Silent Lamb
by xeveningx
Summary: In silence lay secrets that have haunted her for years and she's ready to give up everything in order to take them to her grave. At this point,there's nothing to make her waver.Or is there? In the end,it's her choice: unravel the truth and destroy everything she's come to love, or forever be the scapegoat and lose herself in the process? (Rated M for themes.)
1. The Sound of Silence

_**Chapter One:**_

 _The Sound of Silence_

* * *

A once vibrant sky appeared tainted, red as if reflecting the spilt blood of innocents, soldiers, and trespassers alike. A young woman watched in awe and terror as the city crumbled under the thumb of its own destruction. Eyes normally identical to a clear blue sky were now shadowed, obscured from the lack of light, and instead reflected the vibrant crimson all around her. The sun itself seemed to have disappeared from how the smoke gathered above them, the thick soot darkening the skies as well. From where she stood amidst a harrowing battle, she could hear the screams of the villagers, the victims who had failed to evacuate, the cries of her soldiers, the ones who've entrusted their lives to their cause, and the angry shrieks of those they battled, the petty party that fought against them using technologies of the west borders, magic.

Running head first towards an overwhelmed soldier, the blue-eyed woman brought her sword upwards to parry what would have been a deadly blow before deviating the blade thrusted her way and dealing her own attack causing the other to fall. She heard gratitude from the soldier but ignored it as she continued on trying to lessen the casualties as much she could. But she felt pathetic as this was all she was able to do now. Manipulating what little magoi still remained in her body, she urged _them_ to use it, to empower her and able her to put a stop to the senseless carnage.

They couldn't refuse but neither could they fully oblige. As it was they would be using her very life force at that point; the only thing she could do now was small compared to what she could do where she in any better state. But that choice was robbed from her hands the moment they assumed the city had been filled with simple soldiers; none of them had expected the magical tools, much less those _weapons_ , the dark vessels that were mauling down her troops faster than she could get to protect them.

They had been fooled.

The woman wasted not a single breath to avoid the deaths of her soldiers and to continue and advance forth with them in order to quell the battle that had started because of _her_ inadequacies. She wouldn't have them pay for her mistakes. She raised her sword, commanding the soldiers and few magicians at their army's disposal to advance, and was about to head alongside with them when she heard a distinctive whistling amidst the cacophony of death surrounding her.

Metal, and it was coming steadfast towards her. Her muscles, already at the peak of their pain, could not respond fast enough to what her brain registered in that millisecond and she quickly braced for the impact. One that didn't come.

Instead it hit another, her brother. The boy four years younger than her, one that at the prim age of eighteen was old enough to be considered a man, toppled over onto his back, the arrow piercing cleanly through his left shoulder. Without a second thought, the woman dropped to her knees, worry and dread filling her quickly and overflowing. He groaned in pain as she pressed the wound down, warm blood rushing through her fingers, but not taking it out unable to as she was. Another figure came down next to them. His older twin, she cradled him against her own body and broke the arrow in half, her palms surging with a dark energy, before pulling the tip that had passed through him and putting pressure on the wound. The woman could only stare, ice-cold horror filling her.

The warm liquid in her hands made her turn down to watch the crimson blood—her own brother's—slipping through her fingers. His life threatened after trying to protect her.

The dread she felt suddenly vanished and was quickly replaced with another more alien emotion that she didn't reckoned having. It boiled the blood in her own veins with its fire, tensed her muscles readying them for the pounce, and shut down her mind to any warning.

Standing with a turn towards the roaring battle that continued behind them, the woman reached up to her hair that was primly put in a bun and took the metal feather pen pinned to it, the plumes a dark crimson that matched the blood staining her hands and the rest of her armored body. At her touch the eight-pointed star shone on the feather's base and she felt the surge of magoi, her life, coursing through her with that same fiery rage.

Her siblings yelled, knowing how close to the edge she was, as did her companions, her djinn fervently discouraging her decision. But there was no dissuading her now.

They spilt her kin's blood—blood is what they would pay.

" _You made a vow, my king."_

The reminder from both her djinn simultaneously made her grip lessened but at the sensation of his blood still on her hands—a frightening reminder of what she shouldered—her fervor renewed more intense than before.

 _That is a promise between him and I. But my most important oath was another and it is the reason you chose me._

They were silent at her answer. They could feel the determination and rage that fueled her now. Rage at her own incompetence, and determination to end this battle, one of many to come. And like that they knew she was not backing down. They pitied the fools who would encounter the blade of her wrath.

The woman held steadfast to the feather pen undoing it from its place and brandishing it out, a pale golden light emerging from the eight-pointed star.

 _Spirit of Vainglory and Champions, in the name of my magoi, envelop me to grant me greater power. This I command of you and your household…"_

" _My king…"_ a deep, baritone voice answered her. The sound reverberated in her head as the feather pen shifted in form, the rest of her body shaping as the small surge of her magoi came to her call.

 _Come forth, dwell within my body._

 _Beleth._

* * *

The young woman sat quietly inside the carriage that strode forth on its way back to the capital of their country, Rakushou. The whole ten days of travel that it took from their encampment had been intolerable, especially because she couldn't keep them—or more to the point, _her_ —still in one place.

The twins clamored inside their shared carriage unable to sit down in peace, or at least Suisei, the older, couldn't. Her mouth rambling off at speeds unimaginable to them as they heard her rant about the manic mess that was left behind in their last battle. The youngest twin, Sousei, sat next to the young woman, their older sister, resting his head on her shoulder trying his best to ignore Suisei's shrieks.

"Can you seriously believe the balls on those savages?" Suisei bellowed at the top of her lungs still livid even after ten days. She let out a grunt as she stomped her foot down. "Information, strategy, numbers; I can't believe we were outsmarted like that."

"It was a miscalculation, Sui," Sousei replied with an irritated sigh of his own. Seated, he held a hand to his shoulder at the wound that had yet to heal completely. "Magical tools weren't something we expected to surface, neither that they would outnumber us like they did. We all did what was in our power. And we won over Hakucho; it belongs to the Kou Empire now. As it should be."

" _But we could've avoided so many deaths had we—had_ I _not failed to foresee it."_

The twins stared at their sister's hands as they remained aloft in the air. With no voice, the sign language that the two had created was the only way for anybody to communicate with her. Both gave her an intense stare until Suisei took a quick stride to sit before her and Sousei leaned in, the two siblings taking their older sister's hands in theirs. She felt their hands squeeze hers tightly and she raised her eyes to gaze at them.

Identical faces gazed back at her. Eyes a darker color than her own stark, bright blue; hair darker, as well, than her own caramel brown brushing Sui's shoulders and Sou's neck. They smiled the smiles that made her tremble inside from their love and loyalty.

"We carry this burden with you, Haku-nee," Suisei said, the smile broadening as her hands squeezed hers tenderly. "Sou's right. There was nothing else we could've done."

"Besides," Sousei added with a smirk, "had you not done what you did, we could've lost more than the men we did." He pressed himself closer to her side, his hand tightening around hers as well. "The only reason there are any survivors is because of you. Let's be thankful for that, Kohaku."

Kohaku's brow furrowed slightly at the reminder of what she had done. Back then she had thought that her actions were the right course to take—to save her men and to secure her siblings' safety. Now she doubted her rash actions, ones that had cost many their lives. Despite the dark thoughts that lingered in her mind, she refused to say them aloud lest she worry them. Instead she smiled at them and nodded, accepting their words of comfort.

The carriage continued on its way and reached a rather rough patch of road making the whole thing shake violently. Sousei groaned and shifted in his sit trying not to move much. The two sisters festered over him but he waved them away with a grimace.

"Stop it, you hens." Suisei puffed her cheeks at the insult while Kohaku simply chuckled, not denying it. "It's mostly healed, anyway. It barely even hurt."

Suisei's eyes glinted, a smirk coming to her lips. "Want to test that out?"

Before she even could come close to hitting him, Kohaku slapped her hands away from Sousei, frowning. _"Don't even joke like that."_

Blowing a raspberry, Suisei laid down to rest her head on Kohaku's lap as Sousei rested against her shoulder once more. Kohaku thought that they could finally have some silence for the rest of their trip until Suisei whispered over the noise of the carriage as it traveled.

"You think that the capital's changed since we last saw it?"

"Doubt it," Sousei replied with a sigh. "But I find that we're having a stretch of bad luck. First, Hakucho, and now the news of the emperor's death. What a shitty way to return to Rakushou."

"At least we're going back," Suisei added. "Had father still been in command, we'd be on our way home."

Kohaku didn't comment and instead quietly mulled over their words, knowing about the truth that they so eloquently spoke of.

The Reizei family, of which they belonged to, had been one of the first allies of the Ren family during the great war against the Gou and Kai Kingdoms. Their father, Reizei Koujiro, had been a great armed force for Ren Hakutoku as he aimed to unify the three countries that waged their war against one another. After the empire was forged, their family had been one to receive great status and wealth among the involved. There had even been some talk about unifying their families back when the empire barely flourished, a marriage that she'd heard only whispers of when she was younger. Had the plan gone through, Kohaku guessed that the oldest daughter of their family, Masami, would have married the emperor's oldest son, Hakuyuu. Regrettably, before any actual planning started, the revolt and attack on the royal family took the emperor's life along with that of his two eldest sons.

It didn't take much of Kohaku to notice the sudden change in their father, how on edge he was, after the younger brother, Ren Koutoku, took to the throne of the empire. He hid it well for the year that they remained at the capital after the fire, but after that he took them back to their home, the city he governed over to the south of the capital, Shika. Even after they had returned, Kohaku and Masami asked if they could go back but their father denied their request. He continued his support from his position as General of the Southern Armies but she could tell that he did so resentfully.

Now that the emperor had died, however, his father had sent word to them from Shika where he laid in bedrest, sick, to go and pay their respects. But Kohaku knew better than to believe those words. This wasn't a visit to pay condolences, this was a trip for information. Stubborn and callous, her father was a man who appreciated wisdom more than brute force as his weapon of choice. And in his search for knowledge he seldom left any stone unturned. And now that the tides had turned, he needed to know who would succeed the throne to plan from there—that's what Ren Koutoku's death meant in his eyes from how she saw it.

Despite not sympathizing with her father's views, she knew him well enough to know where his allegiance fell. Even though he viewed his friend's only living son as the legitimate heir, he always thought of the good of the empire first and foremost, something he taught her and her siblings from the crib. If anything, she knew he would support Ren Koutoku's eldest son if and when he became emperor.

Kohaku had her doubts about that, however. As the General Commander, she had heard plenty of the First Prince's ruthlessness in the battlefield. It did worry her that such a person would, more than likely, rule over her homeland. It didn't really matter to her that they had known each other as children, either. That was over a decade ago and people tended to change.

"General. Captains." All three of them turned their heads upwards to their driver's voice as he spoke through the slit that connected the front to their cabin. "We're arriving at the palace."

The twins swiftly moved from Kohaku as she tried shaking the stiffness from the ride without having to stand. As she did so, her gaze wavered over to the window of the carriage to look over Rakushou. The veil of night was all over the city and no light, except the small illumination of the stars and moon, hit the empty roads and quiet houses. The palace wasn't any different either except for the torches lighted up by the few servants that came to welcome them.

Suisei was out the carriage first without even waiting for it to stop. Once it did, Kohaku helped Sousei down with much bickering from his part. As the twins helped unload the carriage, Kohaku kept silent a few feet away. The ominous atmosphere killed her. The quietness did nothing to absolve that foreboding either. At least the gentle flutter of tiny wings kept her grounded, her sensitive ears overhearing the rukh that surrounded the palace as they made their way to the East Wing.

But at nearing the place where they would stay, Kohaku couldn't help but frown at the sight of who waited for them there. Prim and proper despite the late hour, Masami stood with a few more servants flanking her on either side. The sweet smile spread across her lips, her doe-like eyes a dark blue much like the twins eyed them with a welcoming warmth, at least to them. But after so many years of being unable to speak, Kohaku became an expert on reading her sister's moods through simply her eyes. And she knew that look, faking warmth but cold ice on the inside. At least for her.

Reaching them, Masami embraced Suisei and gently kissed Sousei on the cheek, her hand hovering over his injured shoulder. She neither touched nor addressed Kohaku.

"I'm glad to see your travels went well." She smiled at the twins, her hand gently atop Sousei's shoulder, before a slight grimace came to her lips. "I'm sorry I had to leave so soon after the battle. I wished I could have stayed longer."

"No need for apologies," Sousei clarified and touched her hand with his. "Father sent you here before us for a reason. And I'm guessing it's important. Nothing you could've done."

"We had Haku-nee for company, anyway," Suisei scoffed, hooking an arm around Kohaku's. "Even with you gone, Ami-nee, we didn't have to worry."

It was then that Masami finally eyed her and Kohaku could not had felt colder had she been bare in the snow. Wanting to change the subject, she yawned slightly and turned to Suisei with a smile. _"It's late already."_

"Yes," Masami agreed. "I'll take you to your rooms." As they walked Masami boasted about the splendid accommodations that they'd been given. The chatty mood and smile became sullen and it disappeared as she let out a tired sigh, "You will need the rest; tomorrow we'll have a long day ahead of us."

Kohaku certainly agreed with her on that but refrained from commenting as she guided them to their rooms in the inner palace. She quietly chatted with them about the past two days she'd been present and how she witnessed the return of Lady Hakuei and Prince Hakuryuu after having met with the rest of the Ren family. She also mentioned that, with the exclusion of the princesses, most of them had conquered dungeons of their own. At the mere mention of that, Kohaku felt Masami's glare from the corner of her eye. Used to her behavior, Kohaku ignored it the best she could until they reached their rooms. Kohaku sighed at seeing them; the four rooms were separate, and Kohaku realized that hers was the farthest to the right, away from Sou's and Sui's and with Masami's in between.

 _She's definitely glad to see me._

Quickly reminded that they needed rest, the twins went to their respective rooms with a quiet pair of goodnights. Kohaku smiled and bid them goodnight as well but the smile quickly vanished when the two sisters were left to themselves. Wanting to avoid what was surely to come, Kohaku hurried to enter her room. To her dismay, however, Masami quickly stepped in the way of the door's entrance.

A wicked grin came to her lips as she stared evenly at her, "There weren't any problems on the way here, were there, lamb?"

Kohaku bit the inside of her cheek to keep from clicking her tongue. She could hear the ruckus in her head as well as Beleth rung from her feather pen that adorned the bun that sat at the nape of her neck.

" _How dare she…"_ he growled, his voice tainted with anger. She pleaded for him to calm down despite also hating her using such name, one that he had given her the day they contracted.

Relaxing for the both of them, Kohaku shook her head. _"None whatsoever."_

"Good," she replied with a crude smile. "Let's keep it that way during our stay. I don't want you opening your mouth unnecessarily." A scoff came from Masami as she covered her lips daintily with her sleeve. "Oh, my apologies."

The jab being at her muteness this time, Kohaku didn't waste her energy on holding back. _"Don't worry, dear sister. I won't interfere in your schemes. All the more power to me when I see you fail and plead for my help."_

The giddiness in her eyes changed to anger in the blink of an eye. "Don't push it, lamb. I don't want you here anymore than you want to be here. Just be quiet and do not call attention to yourself." Grabbing at her wrist, Masami opened the room's door and shoved her inside. "You better be ready tomorrow. You have to attend…no matter how much that irks me." Kohaku started at her for a second before Masami closed the door with a resounding _clap_.

 _Goodnight to you too, sister dearest._

But as much as she hated their usual routine, Kohaku had resigned herself long ago from changing anything about it. But rest was what she needed now and thinking about Masami wouldn't grant her any sleep. Quickly changing into some night clothes, she sat on the edge of her bed ready to lay down except that she still held her two vessels close.

The feather pen that held her first djinn, Beleth; and the gold bracelet with bone edged on it where the second rested, Marbas. She could feel them both stirring, their fury towards Masami boiling underneath the surface and their concern filling her heart to the brim. She smiled and thanked them for their worry before placing them right beside her pillow where a leather-bound journal laid, a carnation hairpin lying between the pages.

Kohaku laid down with her sight never leaving them, her hair splaying out behind her. Unconsciously, her hand reached up to the base of her neck were a jagged scar protruded. She no longer held a voice, and hat journal held the thoughts she wished she could say. Yet they would stay hidden away from prying eyes. Not wanting to think any more about it, she tried to sleep and from her exhaustion of battle and the trip, she found it much easier than she thought it'd be.

* * *

 _Such beauty at the crack of dawn._

Kohaku couldn't keep the smile from spreading onto her lips as she looked across the expanse of the palace gardens. Having woken up earlier than she thought she would, she found herself going to waste time before the funeral. With three hours to spare, she knew she'd have enough time to simply go look around.

The early sun's rays were barely reaching over the palace walls and spilled over into the inner gardens giving them a glorious glow. Her hand brushed against the railings of the halls as she stepped out of it and onto the beaten path. Memories of days already over a decade old came flooding into her head at the familiar place.

Eleven years had passed since she last set foot on these gardens. The twins were barely six at the beginning, tender cherubs that got into trouble and bullied the poor fourth prince, Hakuryuu. But because they were around the same age, she had wanted them to get along better which prompted her to play with them when she could. Back then her and Masami were in better terms than they were now, too, much better ones. Despite being six years apart as sisters, they would play dress up and bake together and were sometimes joined by the first princess, Hakuei, who was but a year older than Kohaku herself.

Barely ten, she had spent plenty of time within those walls as well, half a year before and a full year after the fire. She recalled well the times when she would follow Hakuyuu, the two becoming good friends after she showed an interest in swordplay. Hakuren often joked around about her being too small to hold a sword or polearm properly making her rage every so often. The rare times that Hakuyuu got Kouen to join them and spar with her. The times she would spend with Koumei and his pigeons, her songs lulling both in a sense of security. Her visits to the two unlikely Ren children, Kougyoku and Kouha, along with the even rarer times where she got them to go out into the gardens together with her rushed through her mind. It truly felt like an eternity ago when all of them would spend the afternoons together in this very garden.

She stepped out of the beaten path and headed for an oak tree, one that had grown considerably taller. Lifting her hand, she placed it upon the hard oak and smiled at hearing the life that fluttered inside, the rukh that made up all life surging within it.

Kohaku may be unable to see them but because of Beleth, a djinn that wielded sound magic, her ears had grown more sensitive over years to the point that she heard the flutter of the rukh's wings. She always wondered what they looked like, what type of bird or insect with wings they resembled, and envied magicians in a way because they could see such life. Leaning against the trunk, she slid down to a sit before closing her eyes and listening to the life around her. At times she found it fitting that someone unable to speak would enjoy the sounds of the world.

Then again, with Beleth's power, her capacity to make sound was her power. And she knew the lethalness that it could have, just like a real voice and words, and how much they could hurt.

"Kohaku…anegimi?"

The rather formal honorific combined with her name made her look up at the high and gentle voice that had called her. Magenta eyes stared back at stark blue, confusion and amazement blatant on both. But recognition quickly came over Kohaku's mind.

 _Magenta eyes, pink hair. Kou…gyoku…?_

In an instant, Kougyoku's confusion shifted to happiness and the young girl fell to her knees to meet Kohaku eye-to-eye, grasping her hands tightly in her own. "It _is_ you! Goodness, at first I thought I as dreaming but I knew it had to be you!" She shook her head and grimaced slightly, "No one told me you were coming. How have you been? Are Masami-san, Sousei, and Suisei with you too? Oh, I can't believe no one told me anything!"

Kohaku just listened as Kougyoku rambled on question after question and simply stared at the young girl before her. Gosh, she's changed. Back when she had last seen her she had been a shy little mouse too scared to speak and instead mumbling away. Now all grown, she was a bright young woman, in both elegance and properness.

 _A little too much make-up though_. She shrugged that idea away and instead listened as Kougyoku kept talking until she stopped abruptly her cheeks slightly dusted in pink.

"S-Sorry," she said, her shoulders slumping a bit but the smile never leaving her lips. "It's just—it's so nice to see you after so long."

 _Way too long._

"B-But I'd like to talk more with you, anegimi," Kougyoku said standing up and reaching for Kohaku's hand as well. "I want to tell you so much about what's happened here and the things I've accomplished. And I also want to hear how it's been with you and your siblings as well."

She wished she could grant her that simple request but knowing that it'd be better to let her know as soon as possible, Kohaku reached up to the ribbon that tied around her neck undoing it. Kougyoku's eyes lowered to the scar and widened, her mouth slightly open.

"W-What…happened?"

Kohaku had gotten used to the question after so long but never really knew how to answer without anyone there to explain. Instead all she did was open her mouth to speak and nothing but air followed. She gave the younger girl a grim smile before shaking her head and shrugging her shoulders. It seemed to take Kougyoku a second before her eyes softened as if understanding. "You…can't speak." Her eyes came down to the hand that Kougyoku held even tighter now and glanced back up to see a sullen expression coming over her gentle face. "I'm really sorry. Whatever happened—I'm sorry."

The sincere sentiment made her smile but a tiny ringing pierced her ears making her grimace. She would have just ignored it had Kougyoku not visibly reacted to it, covering her ear discreetly. She chuckled and slightly rubbed at her ear, "It's getting rather late, don't you think so? We should head inside and get ready?" The thought seemed to hit the young princess, making her stop. "Wait. Is that why you're here, anegimi? To see father?"

She only nodded before standing a few steps back from Kougyoku. Clasping her fist to her palm, she bowed low out of respect as the family of the diseased. Kougyoku, flustered by the action, told her that such things weren't necessary, at least not from her. Instead she asked Kohaku to accompany her back to her quarters to get ready. Seeing no harm in that, Kohaku accepted and walked alongside Kougyoku as the two made their way back. As she kept talking, though, Kohaku noticed the subtle change of tone to her voice, a more sequestered tone.

"It's been quite an uproar as of late." Kougyoku held her hands together underneath her sleeves and held them shyly up to her face. "Many things have happened and Kouen onii-sama has been talking about many a strange topic lately. T-They do go over the top of my head at times but they seem to be a great deal to him."

Deeming it necessary—regardless of how much she found it degrading—Kohaku forfeited her sign language and resorted to simple gestures to ask what she meant. Kougyoku only shook her head as if troubled.

"Truthfully, they are quite a mystery for me to even grasp in the slightest." Kohaku nodded, understanding, but Kougyoku struggled to find her words as she started again. "B-But I did understand that onii-sama wants to unify the world under a single king. Something about it being key to bringing conflicts to an end." She shook her head and chuckled nervously just as they reached her room. "Shouldn't be bothered to think of such matters now of all times, right?"

Kohaku nodded but didn't agree. The things she spoke of sounded rather important, not to mention quite interesting. Unifying the world to bring peace was a concept that she heard her father talk plenty about. It had apparently been the ideology of the first late emperor, Hakutoku, too. But it was one that eluded her own way of thinking till this day.

How could it be possible to unite many peoples with different views and cultures under one ruling power? No matter what angle she saw this from, she couldn't fathom that being the answer to everything. Her mind was brought back when Kougyoku pulled her into her quarters and called for her handmaidens to enter and help them prepare.

Because of the occasion, Kohaku had to dress in simple black and white robes unlike Kougyoku who, because of her place in the imperial family, had to were something a little more elaborate. The young princess, her slight confusion and melancholy forgotten, hurried to change and came to the maids that were currently doing Kohaku's hair. She gave them instructions about how to do it and unable to verbally protest she let them. The maids fought against Kougyoku's excitement as she walked around making their job harder at prepping her for the ceremony. Kohaku chuckled and felt bad for the young women that had to dress her.

But the job, and her hair, was done with quickly and she had to admit that they had done a splendid job given the strenuous orders from the young princess. It was a simple bun held up just a bit low from the crown of her head— _thank god—_ with a simple silver ornament from Kougyoku's to hold it in place. Because of how long it was the rest of her hair was laid to fall over her shoulder. The one thing that she didn't let them do, however, was her make-up and swatted them away to go and help the other struggling maids with Kougyoku. Already twenty minutes before the ceremony started, the young princess apologized for the delay with a sheepish smile.

"You're entering first, aren't you, anegimi?" She received a nod as answer. Kougyoku sat still for the maids as they helped her with what was left. "You should go ahead then. I'll be sure to find you later so that we can ta—I mean…—" She shuffled nervously in her sit making the maids' job a bit harder. "At least I'm…um—"

The poor girl's struggle made Kohaku smile. Conversations like these weren't new to her so she wasn't bothered by it. Waving dismissively at her, Kohaku reached out to touch Kougyoku's hand reassuringly. With a nod, she assured her she knew what she meant and with a cross over her heart promised she'd meet her again to talk like she wanted to.

With that settled she excused herself and exited her quarters to return to her room where she assumed the others would be waiting already. Sure enough, as she got closer, she could hear Sou and Sui chatting away but no sound of Masami. She hoped she had gone on ahead but was disappointed when she saw her standing beside the twins waiting for her. The twins turned to greet her with their cheerful good morning. Masami, to keep up appearances, bowed her head in the only sort of acknowledgement she gave her these days.

"Where'd you run of to?" Suisei asked already dressed. The white dress she had on looked rather nice but Kohaku knew her baby sister enough to know that she was hating every second in it.

"We thought you bailed on us," Sousei jested. He scoffed at the idea while adjusting his own burly outfit, "For a second I thought you'd pitted us with the task."

" _Oh, do you really think me capable of leaving you little devils behind?"_ she signed with a grin.

The two turned to glance at one another before an identical smirk came to their faces knowing full well the answer to that question. Masami cleared her throat, getting their joint attention, and with a sweet smile motioned them towards the west wing where, on the largest compound, the wake was currently taking place.

"Now that we're all here, let us be on our way."

Masami didn't wait and led the way. Sousei and Suisei followed behind her while Kohaku remained a few feet behind. Despite the distance, she could clearly hear all the sounds coming from that place. Footsteps as they entered the wake, murmurs of some people that she didn't bother to pay attention to, and the distinct fluttering of wings that always followed. Oddly enough, though, there was no crying. That alone gave left her somewhat disturbed. Or maybe her previous experiences with funerals had imprinted some kind of standard.

The closer they got to the wake, the more she began seeing people lining up to enter much to her surprise. Once inside she was even more amazed; the whole compound was filled to the brim with people. Most were bowing low, foreheads touching the ground, paying their respects with silent prayers. It wasn't hard not to notice the large group of priests that stood upon the dais where the late emperor laid for his waking. When a faint sobbing came to her ears, Kohaku was baffled that she had missed such sound from the outside. Ignoring its sudden appearance, though, she could easily pinpoint the source since the whole floor was as quiet as a graveyard; it was the empress dowager, Ren Gyokuen.

"Must suck…" Kohaku's ears perked at hearing Sousei's whisper as he leaned closer to Suisei's ear, "being a dowager twice now for auntie Gyokuen."

Reaching up, Kohaku, discreetly as possible, hit Sousei's back. She got both their attentions with that and she frowned, telling them to be quiet and to mind their manners with very minute hand movements. The two apologized sheepishly a second before Masami stopped them at their spot. Kohaku hadn't minded their way until they settled down to kneel before the late emperor. Taking their place, the four bowed low, foreheads touching the ground, and followed suit with the rest of the mourners present.

But a few seconds was all she waited for before tilting her head to the side to glance back at the back and to see where exactly they sat at. True to their previous connections and closeness to the royal family, she supposed, she and her siblings got a first row sit at the wake. From her place, Kohaku needed only to glance upward to see the emperor's dead body up at the dais.

"…father said he died of illness…" Kohaku's ears perked, this time from hearing Masami's whisper. Despite it being at a noise level that would be confused for prayers, she heard it as if it were only them in the room. "…he doesn't believe that."

 _Who would?_

She couldn't be sure without placing the blame but by the state of the emperor's body, their father's suspicions were certainly valid ones. They mostly revolved around the organization that the imperial family had harbored under their roofs. Despite how much they had helped the empire grow, their father had always warned them about the snakes that lurked within the empire, their very home. She suspected that the informants he had in the palace that told him about the organization had also told him about how they had been the ones to not only raise the Magi that now served the Kou Empire but were also responsible for bestowing the majority of the Ren children with Metal Vessels.

Frankly, Kohaku could share the apprehension their father had towards these people now that she stood before them. Despite how much she tried to ignore it, her eardrums were irritated from the high-pitch noise that thundered in the room. At first and from the outside it had been a simple fluttering. It had quickly turned into a buzzing that hadn't bothered her much until she started paying more attention to it. The rukh around these people beat their wings vehemently, contrasting the soothing sounds she heard from nature's rukh.

It bothered her immensely.

Her foreboding thoughts and the noise became nothing but background when she heard the grand doors open again. This time she waited until the new arrivals reached the foot of the stairs to glance up and see who they were. The children of the royal family, of both brothers, stood together to join their mother in mourning and to say farewell to their father and emperor.

"Welcome back…" Gyokuen spoke softly as she held the deformed hand of her late husband, "my beloved children." Nothing but silence answered her. "What's the matter, come here. We haven't seen the princesses since they married; his majesty will be pleased."

Kohaku flinched at hearing Kougyoku's fearful call to her father but all cries ceased when their brother, whom she vaguely recognized as Kouen, moved to silence them. "B-Brother…?" Idle prattle that didn't really matter to her ensued. No matter what the empress dowager said, neither she nor Masami believed that the emperor had died of illness. She focused on the imperial army instead as they walked further up the dais to say their goodbyes.

Even from where she sat, Kohaku could tell some of them apart. The older princesses were all a blur since she never really interacted with them; the only exceptions were Kougyoku and Hakuei, and both she saw among the group. Despite much different now than she recalled, Koumei and Kouha were also discernable among the crowd. One that stuck out like a candle in the dark was little Hakuryuu who was not so little anymore. In his late teens already, she could see the resemblance he held to his brothers, and mostly to Hakuyuu. What she didn't like, though, was the look in his eyes. But if she had to give it to someone, it would have to be Kouen; if anyone had truly seen change since she last saw the whole lot of them, it had been him.

 _I should probably get used to calling them Highnesses._ Pesky honorifics; she never did get around to remember that change after their father took hold of the throne.

Suisei's shifting in place took Kohaku away from her train of thought as did the words she whispered, "…my knees hurt."

"Shut up, Sui," Sousei retorted. "Be glad we don't have to see the corpse up front. Poor Kougyo—ugh."

She didn't miss the baffled expression that came over his face when he glanced up from his place. Following his line of sight, she scowled at what Gyokuen did. Her vision might not be as good as her hearing but the way the dowager clung onto Kouen and the words she unmistakably heard her say painted enough of a picture. The sweet falsetto of her voice reminded her too much of Masami's and sent pure shivers of disgust down her spine. She even heard the children up front share the same feeling at the display, especially the princesses and Kouha although in very different ways. Thankfully, he cut the inappropriate display of affection short moving Gyokuen aside and letting the ceremony continue.

"Gross." Suisei shuffled in place again trying to undo the pain on her knees. "Auntie Gyokuen sure knows how to pick 'em, though."

She intended to remind her of her manners but thought better of it at the truth of her statement. _That she's right about._

First the first emperor, Hakutoku, then the emperor after him, Koutoku. Now her fishing expedition brought her to the next likely candidate for the throne.

"…he'll surely get it." Kohaku couldn't agree more with Masami. Surely Kouen would obtain his inheritance and become emperor, and it would then be open season for Gyokuen if that really was her goal. The priest's words driveled on, through one ear and out the other, as he read the emperor's will to declare the next emperor. But as he read on and the words drifted in hear head, a foreboding sunk in her gut. It bothered her because it rarely failed her.

"The third emperor of the Kou Empire is…Ren Gyokuen. And she shall be assisted by the Imperial Priests in tending to national affairs."

And true to its nature, it hadn't.

The whole floor was silent for a brief second as the information sunk in before the hall erupted into a cacophony of confusion. Kouha's outburst most of all pierced her eardrums along with Sou's and Sui's. Masami was quiet, perhaps having figured something Kohaku had failed to see.

The numerous voices became quieter as Gyokuen gave her reasons behind the decision and why it was paramount that she took the sit as interim empress: Kouen needed to remain at the helm as Commander General of the Western Subjugation Army. A good portion of those present weren't satisfied with that explanation, though. A few seconds is all it took before she felt the floor tremble beneath them. Looking over her shoulder, Kohaku, along with the rest present, watched as the various followers of the Ren family, along with that she assumed were assimilated Household Members, stood in loud protest.

Suisei and Sousei moved to stand as well already knowing fully well who their father, and by extension their family, would support. They were stopped albeit barely by Masami, a hand on both their arms, "You can't."

"We can't stand by and let the empire be broken in two," Suisei protested, already up on one knee.

"She's right. Father would do the same." But before Sousei could fully lift himself, Kohaku slammed her open palm against the wooden floor getting their full attention. She scowled at their foolishness before signing.

" _Don't act rashly."_

"But Haku-nee—" Their words were instantly silenced when Kohaku glanced up at them, her bright eyes appearing rather cold and piercing theirs as she peered at them.

"M-Mother, please reconsider." She turned away from her siblings towards Hakuei as she spoke up to her mother. The panic on her face said it all: she didn't want the empire split, either. "Even if this is his majesty's will, this is—"

"Empress dowager." Silence came over the room as Hakuryuu took the front and spoke loudly as he kneeled and saluted his mother. "Please ascend to the throne. There is no one else who can do so."

Kohaku clicked her tongue and saw the figurative rupture in the empire as the priests surrounding them began to bow before Gyokuen. They spoke in unison, repeating the words that Hakuryuu had spoken, each time with a more fervid intensity.

"This is…" Suisei's voice sounded no more than a whisper amidst the cries. She held onto Sousei as the four of them stood up not wanting to partake with the priests. Sousei held onto Sui's hands as they dug onto his arm from the fear. Kohaku watched them from the corner of her eye, the gesture seemingly innocuous, and glared at the empress dowager and the throng of priests that surrounded them. She and her horrid organization spread terror not just among her country but in her siblings too.

Such audacity, there's no way she would stand for it. Taking Sousei's hand and with Masami following close behind, she dragged them away from the malicious crowd to Kougyoku's side—to where the better alliance fell.

No matter what, despite what her father believed and how much she loved her country, none would deny her the one wish she had. The oath that she had taken upon herself to keep and the reason why she had obtained the powers of the dungeons.

 _This time I will protect them: the people I hold dear to me._

* * *

"What a catastrophe."

Kohaku watched from where she sat, legs tucked away beneath her as she covered herself from the outside cold with a blanket over her whole body, as Masami grimaced and tossed aside a towel she used to wipe her damp hands.

After what happened during the waking the morning of that day, everyone had been put on edge. She had noted that the twins seemed a bit more disturbed that she would have thought at first. Because of how late it was the two had already retired to bed; what was unusual was that they went to Sou's room together. Kohaku supposed they needed some comfort, the kind that they usually found from sharing each other's space like they did when they were younger. In a way, she envied them that closeness, one that she lacked with Masami. And, frankly, no one could blame them. The events that happened were freaky even to her.

Speaking of freaky, Kohaku couldn't keep herself from watching as Masami visibly fumed in her room. The bitching she did wasn't that welcomed but it did somewhat help her calm down.

"Honestly," Masami complained with a hefty sigh, "to think father would be right with his suspicions about the organization."

Now that she thought about it, they weren't known much by any given name. Most of the ones that knew of the group only knew them as the organization. Their other recognizable name seldom surfaced in public, either: Al-thamen. Kohaku stuck her tongue out as even thinking about it left a bitter taste in her mouth. After today she wondered if their father really understood the kind of snakes that their empire nested in their bosom. But from what little she saw they could manipulate, Kohaku feared that they could destroy the Kou Empire from the inside out if allowed to continue on as they did. _That_ she couldn't simply let be.

Her attention got driven away from her thoughts, though, when she caught Masami walking around in circles, panic etched on her face. As amusing as it was to see her so anxious, she had to admit it was making her dizzy, too.

" _Calm down, Masami. You're going to dig a moat there and I like my room as it is, thank you very much."_

Masami didn't take the joke well. She grimaced at reading her signs before clicking her tongue. "Do you not see the severe complications this could have?" She groaned and started up her digging on Kohaku's floor again. "If this country is split in two, we have to choose the winning side in order to preserve the legacy of our family." At saying this Masami stopped and frowned, turning on her heel to glare down at her. "Not like you would care, anyway."

The comment by itself annoyed her but she didn't let it show. Instead she tried to be the voice of reason for once in their lives. _"I do care. But panicking won't help us think clearly."_

"Then what do _you_ suggest?"

Having thought about it since the morning ceremony, Kohaku had all the answers she needed. It would need a little effort to make Masami see things her way, though. _I'll try._

" _Think. From what I see, the imperial family has a higher chance of winning this battle even against that organization. Not only do they have five Metal Vessel users but seven Metal Vessels themselves, not counting Hakuryuu. And if we join them, they'll have me who has two. That's a total of nine against their lot of magicians."_

"You said it," Masami retorted with a scoff. "A _lot._ They number in the hundreds, could even stem to the thousands from what we saw this morning. How much more of a disadvantage do you want?"

" _But we have something they don't."_ At seeing her older sister's peeved look she paused for a dramatic flair that the former wasn't really in the mood in. It instantly made her burst out with a screech asking what in heaven's name she was talking about. _"The people's trust. A country isn't based on royalty; it's based on the people they rule. Without them there would_ be _no kingdom. Kouen's got his share of followers in Kou. Surely that will amount to some merit on the long run."_

Her comment finally calmed Masami down a bit, enough to get her thinking. With a sigh, she gazed up at Kohaku with an annoyed frown, "I suppose it is a viable factor."

" _Good to know we're on the same page. Now we have to let our alliances be known, at the very least to the party we want involvement in."_

That made her sister tense up visibly, something that she enjoyed and took every minute of in. "You mean to his highness?"

Correcting her, Kohaku lifted three fingers from under her blanket. _"Plural."_ Not wanting for Masami to cop out, she stood letting the blanket that had covered her fall and pool on the floor around her feet. Stepping out of the little circle she'd made for herself, Kohaku headed for the door where she stopped briefly to glance over her shoulder at Masami to give her a swift nod towards the outside.

"Now?" Masami cried as if not believing what she meant by the simple nod of her head.

" _Better now than later."_

Masami didn't seem to find a complaint for that but groaned in frustration, nonetheless. Letting her guide, the two headed for the First Prince's study despite the late hour. With every minute they got closer to the library where the study was, Kohaku noticed just how stressful this was turning out to be for her sister. So, against her better judgement, she reassured her that so long as she did what they always did in these kind of situations that everything would turn out fine. It calmed her down a bit but it renewed as soon as they stopped in front of the door.

" _Just follow my lead."_

 _We've only done it, like,_ a thousand _times before._

Not letting her sarcasm get the best of her, she opened the door and let Masami enter first as she walked into the room and down the hall. Treading through tall shelves filled with not only books by scrolls upon scrolls, Kohaku had to keep herself in check. Now wasn't the time to lurk in literature like the worm she was, that would have to be for later. She followed close behind Masami and stopped when they reached the end where, to her surprise, the three princes were; possibly having met for some conference after the fact, she thought. The two bowed low with a salute before Masami addressed the three with respect in both their steads.

The first to acknowledge them had been the Second Prince as he spoke from behind his feathered fan with a bore expression. "Lady Masami. General Kohaku. To what do we owe such late night visit?"

"Your highnesses, if I may so boldly speak…" Masami started trailing a bit at the end. Kohaku only gazed at them all equally, her hands behind her back, a seeming sign of respect, which her sister watched meticulously for the small movements of her fingers as she signed. "First and foremost, allow me to give my sincerest condolences for your loss."

Koumei glanced briefly at his brothers before nodding. "Much appreciated, Lady Masami, but you sound like you have more important matters to address than simple condolences."

Masami's gaze shifted down briefly before replying. "I do. My sister and I have come to inform your highnesses and the General Commander that, as far as the Reizei Household is concerned, we will support you as the heir to Kou's throne despite the late emperor's will."

"What's with this all of a sudden?" Kouha asked with an arched eyebrow, his hands resting on his hips. "Come to take sides before everything goes down."

Well, he wasn't wrong. And although she would've liked the reply to be given more hastily, she saw Masami's hesitation before she spoke up again, repeating what she signed. "Indeed. We are not foolish and do see what is transpiring within the walls of the empire. We do not wish to see our prosperous home be destroyed by—"

This time Masami's pause didn't cause Kohaku annoyance, it made her want to laugh. Masami cleared her throat, her cheeks slightly dusted hopefully from shame, possibly from some slight anger too. Oh, it was hard trying to hide her smile right now.

"By…?" Koumei asked, tilting his head slightly.

"…by petty family matters."

The three men became silent—Koumei and Kouha baffled that she would say such thing, Kouen showed no reaction whatsoever.

Masami shuffled in place and now Kohaku's annoyance came back at seeing her sister's confidence drop so easily. Gosh, she needed some backbone. "Although it's clear that that is not all there is to it, we, frankly, do not care."

" _Just a few more."_

"What we wish is for the Kou Empire to continue its prosperity and we are determined to aid you to the fullest of our individual abilities. That is what we came here to tell you." At finishing her speech, Masami bowed with Kohaku following her example.

The three remained quiet until Kouen spoke up. "I understand." The deep rumble of his voice drummed through her eardrums in a mix between pleasant and domineering, with the latter tilting the scales somewhat. But as she looked at him, she suddenly felt the piercing gaze that fell over her as his eyes, crimson tinted slightly gold, peered straight at her. "And what do you believe is this 'petty family matter' you spoke of, general?"

Kohaku could hear her sister's voice slightly tinged with the anxiety that grew by the second. "Y-Your highness, it was I who—" But her words fell short when Kohaku reached out to touch her arm and stop her, not gazing away from the intense look he appeared to give her.

This man… She and Masami had done this charade more than a thousand times when addressing officials: people that Masami hated to speak to yet found herself obligated to, and people that Kohaku understood more of than her sister. None ever noticed the small movement of her fingers as she signed, much less the miniscule eye movements that Masami had painstakingly developed over the years. And yet he, somehow, had.

This irritated her…greatly. But instead of letting that irritation climb and let it be seen, she smiled sweetly yet somewhat loftily before shaking her head and shrugging her shoulders.

"Hey, you better speak when talking to En-nii," Kouha said with a scowl.

She simply ignored him, instead raising her hand to sign at Masami. Her sister became flustered, cheeks reddened, before answering her in hurried whispers, "Are you insane? There is no way I'm saying—"

Koumei, confused as much as Kouha, spoke up, "What is the matter?"

Masami turned to them with a hint of a grimace on her face while Kohaku did the same, a sweet smile on her lips. "I apologize for her behavior. However, it's not possible for her to answer you."

"What're you talking about?" Kouha asked clearly irritated. "Can she not speak or what?"

"She cannot."

The slight glee that she caught in Masami's voice, the shift in her attitude, annoyed her. All panic gone, confidence came off of her at her favorite topic: humiliating Kohaku. "She suffered injuries during an ambush. We thought her dead but the heavens allowed her to keep her life, not so much her voice." Masami motioned to her with her hand, as if demonstrating them a specimen of some sort. How she hated being toyed with like this. "What you saw her do is how we communicate with her."

Kouha arched a fine eyebrow and turned to his brothers. Koumei's brow furrowed, somewhat confused before turning to their older brother. Neither saw any apparent confusion from him, though. Wanting some answers, Koumei took it upon himself to ask. "How does she command her soldiers then?"

"They're all taught the language. And our two siblings, her right-hand captains, can easily translate her orders to the new recruits or in cases of emergency." Masami placed a hand upon herself, boasting her own intellect next, "The same applies to myself when we're discussing strategies."

Kohaku sighed—her lips parting slightly and air passing through her lips—and tuned out Masami's voice as she continued to talk. Her eyes wandered through the library, her curiosity as to what laid written in those scrolls nagging strongly in her mind. But at feeling an intense baring towards her, her eyes flickered to the front where she met a pair of crimson eyes tinted gold in the candlelight. It was odd; for whatever reason, she couldn't turn away. The look in his eyes was fierce, almost like a feral animal awaiting a prey's mistake, brimming with conviction but at the same time distant, cold, and surprisingly lonesome. At least from what she saw, and it strangely reminded her of a tiger.

The sounds of water pellets hitting the roof above and the walls surrounding them caught her attention; from the looks of it, it must have started raining. The noise distracted her from the man that sat before her, seemingly bored by Masami's ongoing speech, but she didn't waver her gaze away from the three princes as a whole as she continued to listen to the rain as it fell outside.

Fluttering came then as if out of blue. Boisterous and loud, it resounded through her ears, and it had been so sudden that she unconsciously flinched from the flood of noise that coursed into them. Noisy, cacophonous, and radical: this had to be _that_ rukh, the same kind that she heard that morning during the funeral.

Focusing on it, she asked for Beleth's help; pinpoint it, let it rebound in her ear canal and through the room and the outside, and locate it. They weren't far by the sound of it. If anything, they must surely be inside the palace towards the west wing. But then just as sudden as the rukh's noise, she heard a yell and the sound of energy crackling just before something crashed violently through concrete.

Several times.

 _I know that voice…_

"Kohaku, what are—" But Masami's words fell on deaf ears. Before anybody knew what was happening, Kohaku turned on her heel and ran out of the room.

* * *

 _Hakuryuu._

There was no mistaking it. The shout she'd heard and the scream of pain that followed the hit of a building were from the same boy that had raised his voice at the funeral. And despite being on the other side of the palace, she heard them loud and clear. And she wasn't about to stay still and do nothing about it, not when she heard the rukh that followed those dark priests seconds before.

Masami's hollers for her to return were far behind her at the speed that she took off on. Taking the shortest route she could find, she went through the gardens ignoring the rain that poured overhead and quickly drenched her through. She was almost there when the ruckus stopped leaving her eardrums buzzing and raw. Worry crawled through her at the silence but she didn't let it cloud her mind; what mattered was to get there and make sure Hakuryuu was safe.

She skidded to a stop, her lungs burning by the time she reached the place and her eyes wide at the destruction that stood before her. From where she stood under a hallway she could see the damage to the palace, bricks still falling from the recent impact, and not far from there was Hakuryuu sitting and injured from the impact. Not letting her lungs rest or listening to her muscles that demanded some after the sudden sprint, Kohaku ran to him and took a knee to check his wounds.

"Who are—" but she didn't let him speak one word as she grazed his left shoulder with her fingers, prying parts of his torn clothes from the wound. She grimaced at seeing the flesh that tore open, dirtied from the impact against the concrete bridge that had done the damage.

 _But for him to survive this, to even make such indent on concrete walls—_

No, analyzing the situation right now wasn't what mattered. What did was getting him treated. Walking to his side, she grabbed onto his other arm and swung it around her shoulder, accommodating it before doing her best to lift him. Hakuryuu groaned from the pain and started disputing her help until he saw the look on her face. Nothing but genuine concern was etched on it.

"You shouldn't have bothered yourself," he said with a groaned as they took a few practice steps forward. She ignored him and fixed his position so that it'd be easier, if a little, to carry him. "I would have managed, somehow."

 _Sure you would have. Just like you managed with whoever attacked you._

Too bad that she couldn't really say that to him. Stubborn people were not her favorite, more so the stubborn injured ones. Not paying attention to his numerous protests—goodness, could the boy complain—she used her foot to lift his polearm and catch it in her free hand before dragging both their asses out of the rain and back to the hallway where at least the rain wouldn't hit them. Sitting him down against a pillar, she sat down before brushing her hands across his face to wipe away the water and drenched hair, inspecting him for any further wounds she might have missed. But at finding nothing else besides his injured arm, she let out a sigh of relief, her lips lifting slightly at the edges.

"Please," Hakuryuu repeated reaching up with his wooden hand to gently push aside her hand from his face. "Don't bother." This made her frown and slap at his hand; it didn't hurt, it just startled him that she had done so.

 _Stubborn kid._

Relying on her old charades, she tried her best to tell him not to move as that would only aggravate his injuries. She thought about how she'd get help without leaving him unattended but that soon proved to be a futile endeavor when she heard footsteps quickly approaching from where she'd come from. And surely enough, at turning her head in that direction, she saw two distinct figures that ran ahead of the rest all the while calling to her.

"Haku-nee!"

Kohaku wasted no time and, as soon as Sousei and Suisei turned the corner, began giving out her orders shifting back into her commanding persona.

 _Go for the healers and maids. Now!_

"I'll go!" Suisei shouted before running back towards the infirmary. Sousei stayed behind with her and kneeled beside the two.

"What happened?" he asked the two.

" _I don't know."_

"Nothing."

Kohaku had enough of his pessimism and was so grateful that someone was there with her who understood her language. _Boy, get ready to hear it from me._

"Don't be an idiot."

At hearing this, Hakuryuu turned to Sousei with a frown. The younger twin simply raised his hands in surrender before pointing at her. "Don't blame me, prince. She's making me translate and explicitly told me to do so word for word." Kohaku wasted no time and continued to signed away, this time a little faster making Sousei unable to stop for an instant. "You keep saying not to be bothered when you're clearly injured. Prince or not, I won't leave you wounded and drenched to the bone." Pausing briefly, she lays a tender hand on his forearm and gives it a slight squeeze. "I wouldn't want anything to happen to you, dragonet."

Hakuryuu's brow furrowed in confusion, the word swirling around in his head from how familiar it sounded. It seemed vague but he recalled someone calling him by that name when he was little. But the memory fled him when more people started arriving.

Taking the reins, Kohaku instructed them, through Sousei, to clear the area of people in case any collapses occurred. She stayed by Hakuryuu's side awaiting the medical team and told Sousei to go help the others as well to clear off the place. When more footsteps started to come, she hoped that the healers had finally arrived but to her disappointed it was another group. The princes came forth, quickly taking helm of the situation, and close behind them was Masami as they all overlooked the scene in astonishment.

But beyond that, Kohaku saw the lingering anger that brightened her sister's usually dark eyes and instantly remembered what she had done. Running off on her like that, especially in front of the princes, wouldn't bode well for her. It wasn't that she felt bad, either—frankly, she hadn't even thought about what would happen to Masami after she left so suddenly— but she knew that in Masami's eyes it was a sign of huge disrespect. She knew that her sister found such acts highly punishable just like their father did. And true to what she assumed of her, Masami strode right to stand before her.

Kohaku saw her mouth begin to move and clearly heard the air move through her lungs as she inhaled to speak. But the moment she saw the healers and maids rushing around the corner, she forgot about Masami and brought her attention back to Hakuryuu, helping the staff get him up and towards the infirmary. Once done with that, she turned ready to face Masami but what she hadn't expected was for the hit that cut across her face, striking her cheek and making her head recoil a slight bit. Biting her lip, Kohaku wanted to cry out from the force but was shocked to hear Masami's sob as it became slightly louder. Baffled, she turned to stare at her sister's unshed tears just before Masami reached out to cup her reddened cheek, concern visible on her face.

"You ran off without a word. You've no idea…how worried I was. Don't ever do that again."

The moment the tears began to roll down Masami's face, Kohaku had to keep herself from letting her mouth fall open. The action caught her by surprise for a slight second, to say the least, before she saw the same look that she first caught when Masami rounded that corner. Her dark blue eyes, although glazed, held the tiniest of glints in them and it was one that she recognized well enough. Saying nothing, she lowered her head and played along by feigning remorse. Undoing the ao from her ruqun, Masami wrapped it around her shoulders to keep Kohaku warm, an action that belied what she could see in her eyes.

"Let's take you back to your room to dry." The moment she started pulling her along, Kohaku forced herself to stop to look over her shoulder to where the twins were helping the servants. "They will be fine." Kohaku grimaced from the tight grip on her arm. "You need to be tended, too." Dragging her forth again, Kohaku kept her gaze down trying her best to brace herself for what was surely to come.

* * *

So much had happened in the span of the day that Koumei was more exhausted than usual. Having just finished their talk about the actions the organization had taken—the crowning of their empress and the attack on Hakuryuu—it was a day that he wanted over with so that he could rest.

Playing with a strand of his hair, Kouha mulled over a certain meeting that he couldn't keep from his mind. Finally overwhelmed by the suspense and wanting to relieve some of the tension he felt on his brothers, he spoke up.

"How'd that happen?"

"How did what happen?" Koumei asked.

"That mute girl," he clarified with a nod to the door. "How's that commanding a part of our army?"

Koumei tapped his chin with his fan a couple of times, recollecting his thoughts about the subject before answering. "If I recall correctly, Lady Kohaku is acting as interim general in General Koujiro's stead." A yawn escaped him without his noticing but he simply ignored it. "But then again, she has much more potential than her father at commanding, being a Dungeon Capturer and all." This made him turn over to Kouen in slight curiosity, "She possess two, doesn't she?"

"Really?" Kouha asked, astounded. His eyes wandered off towards the ceiling while he scratched at the back of his head, deep in thought. "And why do I have the feeling that I know her?"

"You met her when you were young," Koumei explained, "Around the same time we met you, too." Kouha kept quiet as he rummaged through his brain for the memories his brother spoke off. Meanwhile, Koumei turned to walk closer to his older brother, leaning in and hiding part of his face with his fan. "My brother and king, that the Reizei Household so openly declared allegiance to us is troubling. General Koujiro never approved of the late emperor's crowning. His children, I believe, aren't any different."

"How did she get two, though?" Koumei and Kouen turned up to Kouha who had been so indulged in his own thoughts that he failed to see he'd interrupted Koumei. Half of their younger brother's mind had been on something else while the other half brought him back to the number of djinn the woman possessed. His mind quick to change, though, raced through other questions. "I doubt she could get more, though. Right? It's not like she's as strong as you, En-nii."

Kouen didn't mind the questions thrown at him yet answered none. "The number is irrelevant so long as we have her implicit cooperation. So long as they do no trespass where they shouldn't then what they or their father think is meaningless."

Kouha and Koumei stood behind their brother's decision, though it wasn't to say that questions still didn't linger. Especially for Koumei who had heard the reports of the expedition that General Kohaku had led some days prior through the southwest. Despite his acceding, he knew that his brother and king would be curious as well. After all, that mission had the highest death toll recorded on any of the General's expeditions which said something for a commander that usually refrained from using force. And the ones who survived refused to speak a word of what had occurred.

Something curious, indeed.

* * *

"You wretched brat."

Masami's hand struck down with force where she'd previously hit Kohaku. This time, though, she could tell that her sister wasn't holding back. The slap from before had been one for show; this one had been dealt with the sole purpose of hurting. And Kohaku had felt every ounce of it, her jaw furiously throbbing from the impact.

"Have you any idea the shame you caused me?"

She didn't answer and instead reached her hand up to cup her pounding cheek. Masami, however, denied her that comfort, batting the hand away before it reached her face. "Not only did you embarrass me at that meeting but you also left me looking like an idiot in front of the princes when you ran off like that."

She raised her hand and brought it down but Kohaku, out of instinct, stepped back in time to avoid the hit that would have struck her on the same place. This however only made her sister angrier and she reached out to grab her wrist and yank her closer to her. Her grip was so tight that it started to leave marks on her wrist, making her wince at the searing of her nails biting into her skin.

"You may be a Dungeon Capturer and you might hold father's favor as a general but never forget—" Gasping audibly at feeling Masami's nails finally cutting through, Kohaku felt the pain as drops of blood dropped from the small wounds. "I'm the one that holds your strings. And you know _exactly_ what I'll do if you disobey."

At hearing this, Kohaku stopped resisting and no longer cared for the pain coming from her wrist. Standing still, her shoulders slumped, her head lowered in quiet submission, and simply let Masami do as she pleased.

Smirking, Masami raised her hand and struck the same cheek a couple of times with the same force, perhaps harder; she couldn't tell. When she grew tired of that, or conscious that those would leave visible marks, she stripped Kohaku of her wet clothes only to continue on the rest of her body. Throwing punches wasn't something that she often did but it seemed to be what she favored when she was this angry. One after another they came but, thankfully, Kohaku only felt the first five or so before the pain started to blend together. It was then that Masami stopped and stepped away.

 _Thank god._

Kohaku grabbed at her clothes to cover herself but was met with a grim sight when Masami returned with needles, a dagger, and a candle in her hands. A malicious smile spread across her face before she spoke, "Who said I was done?"

Of course. How stupid of her to think she'd be satisfied with only that. She gripped her clothes tightly around her body for a second before letting them drop to the floor once more. Lying face down as she was told, Kohaku bit her tongue at what shortly followed.

Almost instantly, she felt the magoi inside her stirring and heard the faint voices of her djinn, the feather pen and bracelet laying a few feet away from her, close enough for her to reach. And yet she refrained from doing so. Even without being in contact with them, she could feel their concern for her, as she had times before when this happened, and their revulsion towards Masami. And she could just imagine the outcome if she decided to use either of her vessels to draw her away. It was easy to imagine her sharp fangs tearing into her jugular as vicious bitterness clouded her mind, or her head exploding in a colorful array of warm blood and pink flesh from the rapid vibrations going through it.

But that's all she could do. All she ever did.

In some ways it helped her cope. It helped her forget and detach from what was happening right now. But not even the gruesome ways she could think of killing Masami could keep her from feeling the pain: the searing heat of the wax as if fell on the tender parts of her body, hot needles that pierced through her flesh, the hot flame that touched up against her back, or the welts that started to form from the hot blade on her back.

Kohaku couldn't help but choke on her tears as they crawled down the side of her face at the awfulness of it all. Most of all, she couldn't stand the smug smirk on Masami's face, the glint of satisfaction in her eyes. Where it not for the gruesome things she was doing, one would think her the perfect depiction of eloquence.

And all she could do was nothing. Nothing except bear with it until it ended. And the saddest thing of all was that Masami knew, as well as she did, that after what had happened that night and from how late it was that no one would bother them.

No one would go check on her.

No one would save her.

And despite how much she wanted to scream from the pain, she couldn't, and that only made her spiteful, not at Masami but at herself. In the end, even if she could scream, there was no point.

Nobody would come.

No one would hear her.

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _ ***Nervous laughter***_

 _ **Hey, everyone! Now before anyone says anything, I know that I still owe a couple of other stories. I know I shouldn't be starting yet**_ _another_ _**story when I haven't even finished EoT:Rewrite or started my fourth installment in the KH saga I'm writing x3 (which I know a lot of people have been waiting for). And don't even get me started on the RRP.**_

 _ **But I might start two at once, both of which I have the outlines ready for. It'll just take effort to write the chapters. But that all depends on how well received this one is :3**_

 _ **That is it for the general information.**_

 _ **Now for what matters on this story in particular.**_

 _ **First let me give you the summary on my profile:**_

 _"In silence - and in self-defense - I figured things out in my own little way." (Loretta Young)  
Unable to speak, Reizei Kohaku has never found it hard to express herself within her family and the people and soldiers who are under her command. But behind the impregnable silence lie secrets that have haunted her and her family for years, those of a young child that ravaged through countless of lives. She lives every day of her life in fear that the day will come when the silence of their secrets will be broken. Now as the General of the Southern Army, she must see to the Commander General, Ren Kouen, and the Imperial Princes of her beloved Kou Empire, but through their doubts they begin to figure out what her small family keeps quiet. But Kohaku won't allow it to be found; she's ready to give up everything in order to take that secret where it belongs, to her grave. Her determination starts to waver though the more time she spends with the Imperial Family, and more so with the First Prince. Soon she'll be caught between a rock and a hard place: unravel the truth and destroy everything she's ever loved, or forever be the silent lamb of the family and lose every and all chances of being herself._

 _ **I've gotten really into Magi in less than six months. That's a record with me (not counting Yuri! On Ice). But this manga/anime turned out to be such a complex story that I instantly fell in love with it. And well, you can guess how my mind worked with it. And this happened~**_

 _ **Honestly, this chapter was the toughest thing I've written. It took about four drafts for me to come up with something I actually liked for a first chapter.**_

 _ **Hard but worth it o(*ω*)o**_

 _ **Anyway, this is the first one in Magi fandom and that I'm very excited to start.**_

 _ **So, as always, hoped you enjoyed the very first chapter of Silent Lamb and stay tuned for the next chapter!**_

 _ **\**_ _ **(**_ ๑❛ _ **ワ**_ ❛๑ _ **)**_ _ **/**_


	2. A Battle of Wills

_**Chapter Two:**_

 _A Battle of Wills_

* * *

A thin, rice paper screen.

That's all that separated Sousei and Suisei from seeing as she laid in bed, the sunlight pouring in through the door across the room. Her parlor, where the two were, was illuminated well by the light that came in and what was left of the rays that passed through the screen bothered her eyes, making her curl further into her blanket. Such a thin door kept them from seeing her beaten and defeated.

"Haku-nee, you sure left a mess. Did you even unpack?" Kohaku watched as Sui's shadow moved across the screen. She could see her as she picked and put away the things that she failed to put away the day before—some out of laziness, the rest out of pain.

From the corner of her eye, she saw the other shadow coming dangerously close to the screen. Her breath hitched when she saw Sousei's fingers curl around the edge. "You sure you're okay?" She knocked quickly against the wooden bedrest, just once to assure him that yes, she was all right. She curled up further into her fetal position but regretted it when a phantom pain tore across her back.

 _Raw._

Her head was wracked at the loud _crack_ of her door opening. She buried her head among the silk sheets of her bed, trying her best to keep the noise that was hurting her aching head out. At times like these she hated her acute hearing.

"Is she still in bed?"

Kohaku despised Masami's voice. She heard her footsteps as she strode across the wood floor and closer to her. The twins affirmed the suspicion in unison which got a sigh out their eldest sister. "I suppose…you're still shocked form what happened last night, aren't you, Kohaku?"

Her lip hurt as she bit down on it, hating the double meaning of that sentence. Nonetheless, she knocked once to answer her question. The twins quickly urged her to go with them to have some breakfast. It'd be good.

 _And I would love to but…_

She'll be there. Kohaku wanted to be nowhere near Masami right now. She knocked twice, refusing.

"Go, you two," Masami said, ignoring their pleas. "I'll see to her and we'll join you for breakfast." The twins agreed and she heard the door close quietly as they left. The instant they closed, she curled herself further into the small haven as if that could protect her.

Kohaku flinched when Masami yanked the sheets from over her, leaving her with only the disheveled white robe she had thrown on to sleep. Dark maroon stains marked it at places, mostly on her back from the dried blood. Masami glared at her before nodding her head towards Kohaku's clothes.

"Change."

She sat up, regretting it when the welts on her back burned, not as healed as she had hoped they'd be. _"It hurts. I won't be able to keep a straight face."_

"Oh, I don't think you understood what I said." Stepping closer, she grabbed a handful of her hair that rested undone, long to her hips, and yanked, hoisting her up from the bed. "You _will_ dress and be presentable to dine. We must not lose face any more than we already have. I will not have another one of your missteps."

 _Misstep? If seeing to Hakuryuu's wellbeing is a misstep, then I'm glad I did it._

"Don't mess this up more than you already have," Masami said. "As you saw, I won't hold back even here in Rakushou, so you might want to get comfortable with the idea of listening again." With that said, Masami threw her against the bed. "And don't forget that there's a meeting to discuss the conquer of Hakucho. It'll be after breakfast. I want you there, presentable."

" _Yes...sister."_ Masami smiled but Kohaku was swift to wipe it off. _"After all, they need someone who's actually in charge to present what happened."_

Masami scowled but didn't dare hit her. Kohaku guessed that she was worried about what others would say or ask if there was a fresh mark on her face. But after a minute of thinking, Masami smiled sweetly which sickened her. "Mock all you want, little lamb. Where this is concerned, I'll _always_ end up winning."

This time it was Kohaku's turn to scowl. She hated how Masami so easily could aggravate her with simple words. She may be a mute, a submissive punching bag at times as well, but one thing that she refused to be was a failure; she _abhorred_ losing. Kohaku's obsession with winning at every and any cost clung to her like a disease. Where Masami and her torture were concerned, she may take the punishments to avoid further—and a much worse—retribution but she always came back hitting harder. Always found some way to best Masami so that at least where their lives, family, and political matters were implicated, she would come off on top.

 _Boast all you want, sis. You'll never surpass me out in the world for as long as I live._

Masami, with the last threat given, turned on her heel and left the room. Kohaku let out a sigh of relief, appreciating the silence that ensued. After last night's punishment, all she had wanted for the morning had been to stay in bed and sleep the pain away. She hadn't counted on the twins visiting her first thing in the morning, though. She guessed that they were still worried after all the things that happened the night before but she doubted that had been all. She knew Masami and how her conniving mind concocted plans; she must have sent them to scoop her out of the room.

Thinking of those things tired her more, though, and instead she stood as slowly as possible to go and bathe. Thankfully, she'd learned a long time ago how to care for herself, injuries and all, after nights like these. At least, this time, she could walk by herself. Drawing her bath, she didn't take long to clean up. Once out, though, she paused. Standing before a mirror, she gazed at her body. The welts on her side and back were raw but properly healing; only a few must've been really deep. Thankful for that, she began to dress. But nothing fancy, just some plain blue and white hanfu she kept around and decided to keep her hair down in a simple plait to have it lay over her shoulder. The plainer the outfit, the better.

There wasn't a reason to worry about what anyone would say if they didn't even see her, right? That logic—no matter how backwards it was—was what she stuck to. If Masami was going to be angry at her no matter what she did, then she might as well give her a damn good reason.

Missing breakfast? No, that would be too easy. Now missing that meeting…

 _She'll be livid._

Her lips lifted at one corner, the thought making her giggle. Yeah, that would work just fine. Coming over to her bed, she took from underneath her pillow her two vessels, leaving behind the journal. She clasped the gold and bone bracelet against her left wrist and pinned her feather pen beneath her ear, the crimson feather falling downward slightly.

The warmth coming from the two comforted her. She knew that the two of them worried about her, and that was way before they had started giving her earfuls about those 'punishments.' But they knew her reasons, and after asking for them not to mention it anymore, they stopped. Didn't mean they would stop worrying, though, and she knew this. She knew and felt their anger boiling at times, feeling as it grew and accumulated over time. If they needed to release any pent up hatred for Masami, like she sometimes needed to, she went out and practiced her djinn weapon equips. Physical activities with them calmed her down a lot. And it was much easier than actually letting them kill Masami, no matter how enticing the idea had become over the years.

Kohaku didn't feel like training at the moment, though. No, she had a better idea as to what to do to let out steam. Completely avoiding exiting through the door, she climbed on her bed and through her window, crouching to break her fall on the other side. She winced at the burning on her back but did her best to ignore it and instead walked off to the closest palace outer wall she could fine. Her eyes ran up the length of the wall, measuring it. That thing was double, maybe even triple her height, and that said something when she stood a little over 5 feet and a half.

" _Nothing's out of reach from our sound, my king."_

Beleth's voice ringing in her head made her smile as her fingers reached up to touch the crimson feather hanging from her ear. The eight-pointed star shined briefly on it seconds before Kohaku's hearing became extremely acute, more so than before. Taking a step back, she jumped a tiny bit forth but instead of touching solid ground, her foot bounced against air. Kohaku felt beneath her feet the particles of air as she pressured them to cause vibrations—the same particles of oxygen that they inhaled and that Beleth told her about which sound was made of. The particles collided so fast and so often that they made a tactile surface if for a few seconds, enough for the sound that they made to propel her upward and allow her to vault over to the other side of the wall, leaving only a tiny indent on the ground where she'd jumped from.

She smiled as she rolled her landing to end on one knee. _Thank you, Bele._

" _My pleasure."_

Wiping the dirt from her clothes, she scurried away from the palace and to the city before mingling in with the rest of the crowd that passed through their mornings as usual. Her eyes wandered to every person and place, adoring the sight of Rakushou in the morning. Inhaling deeply, she could tell the kinds of foods, traditional ones made here, that were being sold at the various stands. And the sounds...they were amazing. So many people chattering away in boisterous glee with a sort of energy that she could never fathom. Voices of countless of people with such vitality, spirit, and life.

Frankly, she rarely left home or any place they visited. The battlefields were no different filled with cries of anguish and desperation, especially their last mission in Hakucho. But Rakushou, the capital of her beautiful homeland, couldn't be rivaled. At least the people that lived within its boundaries couldn't be, they held the heart of the city itself.

Forgetting the pain, she sprinted through the marketplace and for once reveled in her home. Eating delicious foods and pastries she hadn't touched for years now, going around looking at shops, and even strolling along the streets was quite enjoyable. She truly had forgotten just how relishing a day like this could be and she wanted to spend it to its fullest.

It was around noon when she stopped, apple in hand, to sit and rest. Her eyes never stopped their wandering, though, and watched the people as they passed by. As she bit down, her eyes lowered at seeing the distinction between all of those who walked through the streets.

White. Green. Brown.

Prominent colors that stuck out like a sore thumb. Really, she understood the idea behind this all: the hierarchy that existed within their citizens and the way to climb social ladders. But understanding didn't equate agreement. Although she agreed it was a much more humane system than most she'd seen in other parts of the world that she'd seen during her own conquers, she would never understand the need to place a certain group of people above others. For her, and in the end, they all died the same, rotting away in the earth. If they died the same, then they might as well live equally.

But those were personal views of hers, and she had no means to support her own ideals by any sort of margin. She did see purpose in the unification of the world to stop conflict but the ends didn't justify the means. They certainly didn't justify violence, either.

A chill ran down Kohaku's spine as she remembered Hakucho, the one city that eluded her treaties of peaceful unity. The memories of what had happened on that battle—what she could have lost—still made her blood run cold. But she shook the thoughts out of her head, thankful that she had decided to skip the meeting. At least this way, without her there, people would be more inclined to testify to what they saw without any sort of duress, intentional or otherwise.

Finishing the apple, she threw the stem away and was about to grab another from her pocket when the brisk sound of footfalls caught her attention. Lifting her gaze, she oversaw from across the street as the owner of the store gave orders to a young boy wearing brown, somewhat clean yet tattered, clothes. Couldn't have been more than eleven and despite that he seemed small. Without checking, the boy turned and sprinted ahead unable to hear the carriage that quickly headed his way, one she clearly heard coming from miles away.

Kohaku sprinted forward without a second thought, the fruit falling from her hands as one of her arms reached out to the boy that now turned, eyes wide, at the horse-drawn carriage that came at them both now. She brought him closer to herself and with her other arm reached to touch her pen, quickly bringing some of Beleth's powers to surface. In the fraction of a second, she hastened the speed of the vibrating air before them. Fast enough to solidify, it created a wall of pure sound slightly visible from the high amounts of vibrations yet low enough of a timbre to not be heard. The horses collided head first with the wall and burst back from the blow of the vibrations. On her side, however, the sound reverberated and bounced back at them, pushing her and the boy she held safely down against the dirt floor.

 _All fucking high hell._

She groaned at her back hitting the ground, but with the boy safely atop of her, unharmed, she couldn't really complain. Kohaku sometimes didn't understand the double-edge mechanic Beleth's powers had. To her it was stupid that whatever force she hit with, the same force would be reciprocated in the opposite direction: namely, her way.

The boy scrambled out of her arms as they sat up, his eyes, a deep mossy green, wide with fear. She smiled at him and patted his head, ruffling dark blonde tresses, the two things she could do to appease his worries. His face slightly relaxed until the whining of the horses stopped as the carriage driver calmed them down. The burly man stomped their way, his face red-beet from his anger, and glared down at them.

"What is the meaning of this?" he shouted.

"I-I'm sorry." The boy stuttered and looked between the two. Kohaku wondered who he really was apologizing to.

"You're sorry! Who's going to pay for damages to my mare if something happened to her, you slave." The man continued his banter at them, mostly the boy, and she was starting to hate the yelling.

"Hey, what are you doing, woman?" Kohaku ignored the man and instead went to pick up the apple she had dropped, still intact. Raising it to the horse, she saw it whine and smell the fruit before fully devouring the whole thing. She smiled and patted it's nuzzle as it ate.

Speaking may be out of the question but actions were sometimes, if not more often, a clearer response. Pulling back and patting the horse away as it sniffed her head, she motioned to the horse with a smile. The man was the most confused; the boy was somewhat, too, but quickly understood something.

"Y-Your horse is fine," he said coming closer to her. "It was startled is all. There wasn't any harm done." Kohaku nodded and patted the boy's head before bowing as an apology to the man. The boy followed suit in a fumble but the man wasn't having any excuse.

"You think I'm going to take the word of a slave?" He puffed his chest out and glared down at the two of them in some sort of power maneuver. Kohaku wished she could somehow show him what real power looked like but none had really seen the wall she'd created so that was out of the question. Besides, using her powers outside of necessity's sake wasn't something she did often.

Beleth's laughter rung in the back of her mind. _"I dare to differ."_

 _You're not helping, Bele._

"There's obvious damages, puny brat. Who's going to own up to it? Ha?" The burly man turned to her this time, his face even redder from the anger. The boy came closer to her and buried his face against her side, his hands grabbing tightly at her clothes. Her eyes went over to the shop from where he had come and to the owner; the man didn't even lift a finger and instead went inside his shop. Turning back to the carriage driver, he found him staring right into her eyes.

 _Oh, it's me?_

Well, they were out of luck then. Not like she was going to pay for unharmed goods, anyway. Taking the child by the wrist, Kohaku walked past the man but he didn't seem to be letting go so easily. A forceful hand landed on her shoulder, gripping it tightly, and she frowned. If he was going to be inconsiderate like that, then she wouldn't hold back either.

"Stop that this instant!"

All eyes turned to the women's voice that spoke above all the commotion. Kohaku had a hard time turning around as the man held her stagnant but saw as all eyes turned behind her to the person who'd spoken. It was a voice she couldn't discern. But some options were quickly scratched out when the multitude that had gathered to watch prostrated themselves.

 _It's either some high-end merchant or land owner._

The man finally let go of her and prostrated himself apologizing profusely. "My apologies, your highness. Such rudeness in front you is unforgiveable."

 _Highness?_

Looking over her shoulder, Kohaku's eyes widened at seeing the First Princess, Hakuei, standing just a few steps behind her. Dressed in her usual pastels and light colors, she looked stunning. Behind her was a young boy, possibly the attendant that had accompanied her out.

Having no choice but to do it, Kohaku saluted her with her fist in her palm. Hakuei smiled down at her before patting her shoulder. "I see you're in some trouble, General Kohaku."

"G-General?"

Kohaku clicked her tongue at hearing the man's apologies as he groveled at her feet for having been rude to her. She hated having people do that when they heard her title, one she didn't really even own.

"I believe the matter at hand can be solved easily," Hakuei suggested as she stood beside her. "Seishun, we can attend to this honorable man's carriage and any damages it received, correct?"

"Yes, princess." The attendant came forth and began talking with the man. Kohaku sighed in defeat not thinking that appeasing such a derogatory pig would help in any way.

Hakuei turned to Kohaku then, a smile on her lips. "It's been a while."

 _Eleven years can be called that, sure._

Hakuei's eyes came down to the boy that still clung to Kohaku's clothes for dear life. When the older woman reached down for the boy, Kohaku instinctively placed her arm between her and the boy. "I don't mean him harm. I just want to make sure he's okay."

"I-I'm okay," he answered with a nod, "because Miss helped me."

 _Miss?_

"Yes, I saw." Hakuei lifted her gaze to Kohaku. "You used your djinn's powers to stop the carriage, didn't you?" Kohaku flinched at being caught but simply scratched her cheek meekly. "You're not in trouble if that's what you're worried about. I would actually like to thank you for your actions."

Kohaku shook her head. She hadn't done much, at least not enough to merit any thanks from her. She tried vehemently to tell her so with her charades.

A grimace came over Hakuei's lips as she looked at Kohaku. "So it's true. You cannot speak anymore." Kohaku didn't even look up to see the pity that was surely on the princess's eyes. She never liked seeing anybody's pity when they first found out about her disability.

Thankfully, though, Seishun had finished his errands and had returned to their side. With that matter done, they decided to accompany her back to the palace. Before they even moved though Kohaku glanced down at the boy who'd surely lost his job. Even for a slave, being left like he had been meant disownment. Without work, even after his five years were over, there would be nothing for him to do afterwards. No experience would get him no job; she would've saved him to have him die, anyway. Trotting away to buy some parchment with a bit little of the huang she had left, she used her feathered pen to write what she wanted done.

Passing it to Hakuei with a grin, the princess took it and read over it with a similar smile growing on her lips. "That certainly is a way to fix his predicament." She passed Seishun the piece of parchment before turning to the young boy that stood beside Kohaku. "What is your name and age?"

"S-Seijin. And I'm twelve…your highness."

"Seijin, the young woman who saved you has a proposition for you," Hakuei explained.

"A…proposition?"

"From what she explained to me, she would like for you to come back and work for her family as a vassal." Seijin turned up with confusion in his eyes and started at Kohaku. She only smiled and nodded to assure him that that was indeed what she asked of him.

Seijin shifted his weight between his feet, clearly nervous from the sudden call of attention. He gulped before speaking, "But…won't the seamstress and her husband be upset? I've been working there for a while now."

"You'd be surprise how easily things can be arranged. But only if that's what you want."

The boy turned up, huge doe-like eyes a dark green color staring right into Kohaku's stark blue ones. She hadn't had a voice to assure him that it'd be better for him to work under her family than out here. After ruining his future, she thought that was the least she could do. But unable to speak those words, she simply patted his head reassuringly.

"I-I do!" he chirped up, a slight pink dusting his cheeks making her chuckle. Hakuei quickly instructed for Seishun to take him back to the palace and get him situated first. When he asked what they would do, Kohaku simply pointed elsewhere towards the city. She didn't want to go home just yet.

"I'll accompany her." Her brow furrowed at hearing the princess's words. Hakuei smiled, assuring Seishun that she would be fine before the two left into the city. Kohaku didn't bother waiting for Hakuei and instead walked ahead wanting to enjoy the little bit of time she had left before the sun started to go down.

Hakuei sprinted after her and walked beside her as she continued to explore. "You seem to be well, Kohaku."

Chitchat. She liked it…when she could partake in it. But seeing as Hakuei neither knew how to translate her language nor had a translator, this would be a rather one-sided conversation. Those weren't her thing. She nodded out of courtesy and pointed at a stand selling pastries. Thankful that she could afford one for both of them. She took them to a small, quiet place where they could sit and enjoy it peacefully.

"I see you're still as quaint as before." Kohaku couldn't help but look out the corner of her eye at Hakuei as she sat beside her, the small cake she'd bought still sitting in her palm. A harrowing silence ensued, one that Kohaku didn't really like. Quickly eating her portion, she was about to stand when Hakuei spoke up again. "At times like these, I envy your peace of mind."

 _Envy me?_

Peeved, Kohaku reached over and pushed Hakuei's hand upward, which was still hovering midway to her mouth, making the pastry collide with her open mouth. Hakuei, startled, stared dumbfounded but at seeing the smile on Kohaku's face she laughed, wiping at the pastry left on her face. A little quietness came over but this one wasn't as suffocating as before. It was lighter, and she hoped that her little charade had, at least, helped Hakuei cheer up somewhat.

Kohaku had no way to know how the princess felt but surely after having seen what happened the other day with her brother, she wasn't in the best of moods. She'd seen it in her face and even in the way she moved. So tense and cautious. Small gestures that she hid behind smiles. There wasn't any mistaking that she was beyond stressed out.

 _Poor thing._

Taking her hand, Kohaku dragged her along as she walked through the streets of the city. With Hakuei coming along with her, it was a little harder to remain inconspicuous but she liked the company. She especially liked to see the princess smiling and it reminded her of the times, years ago, when she did the same. Perhaps they weren't as rich in happiness as they were back then but if she could make her smile like this then perhaps nothing was completely lost.

Soon the sun started to set across the sky, the beautiful hues of blue changing into an array of red and orange. It was as they made their way back to the palace that Hakuei brought up a conversation that Kohaku had forgotten up till then.

"Now that I recall, wasn't the meeting about your mission in Hakucho today?"

At the reminder, her shoulders slumped down as she briefly stopped. Hakuei halted a few steps ahead and turned around with a small chuckle escaping her. "You…forgot?" Kohaku shook her head and turned away with a meek grin. "You purposefully didn't go?"

There wasn't really any way to lie to her now. She'd found her in the city, clearly wasting time. It would look bad but she just didn't want to go. But by now, without a doubt, the meeting would be over and although she would be scolded, she didn't regret coming out.

* * *

That same morning, the twins made their way after having eaten breakfast towards the room where they would be holding the meeting. Sousei had known this would happen with the ruckus that the mission at Hakucho had caused. He understood the reasons but hadn't really seen a need in having all the high ranks in the Southern Army attend it. That didn't just include him and his sisters but it also included other people, those sent from the capital and who had no connections to him or his family.

No connections meant no loyalty.

And if they spilt what had happened at Hakucho, they would have him to face. That promised slight bodily harm. Should they even mention any wrong that his sister, Kohaku, had done—well, they wouldn't have much to say afterwards.

They entered the room that was already filled with other people. The meeting had to be done with early so they had scheduled it in the morning. The three of them stepped in and took their seats, apparently the only ones vacant. As he eyed the ones present, the ones that stood out the most were the first and second princes that were there. The others he vaguely recognized from the mission, the advisors and whatnot that had accompanied them over a week ago. Masami sat beside him with a single empty chair flanking her. Sousei stared at it knowing fully well that its occupant wouldn't be bothered to come.

"You think she's going to ditch it?" Sui asked beside him as she laid her chin on the table. Underneath it, he kicked her shin making her flinch and only hit her chin in response. She scowled at him but he grinned before reminding her to mind her manners.

"Isn't it obvious?" he answered.

"She better not." Both twins turned with a curious look at Masami. She had been slightly irritated that morning during breakfast but she seemed even more now when she could see that everybody except their sister was present.

Sousei sighed already knowing how easily it was to make Masami mad. He loved his family but sometimes he admitted that each one of them had their flaws: Masami was too controlling, Suisei too childish, and Kohaku…

Well, she was something else completely.

"As most of us are here," the second prince, Koumei, stated, getting their attention. "We will go on and hear the report about the conquer of Hakucho. In which case, Lady Masami, as the head military advisor of the Southern Armies, it would be your place to start."

"Yes." Masami stood from her place and began to explain what Sousei and most of those present, with the exception of the princes, knew.

Hakucho: a fairly large city to the southwest. After being away from home for over a year, their last mission had been to conquer it before going home to Shika. That had been the plan. After much research they had concluded that the population was rather small for such city, and most of them had no military training whatsoever. The citizens didn't appear well of, either. There was much hunger going on and small riots that were destroying the city from within, making it an easy target. For all intents and purposes, it should have been an exemplary conquer.

And it would have been had it not been for those… _things._

"Black weapons?" Koumei asked, confused at the words that Masami used.

She nodded. "We've never encountered them before. But they seemed to be some sort of magic. Then again, they were quite different from the magic tools that the mercenaries were using as well."

"What was their nature exactly?"

"That…" Masami pursed her lips and came to a standstill. Because she usually stayed back during the actual fighting, Sousei knew that Masami couldn't really tell them the weapons' nature. Only they could and even that was in a vague context. Kohaku had been the one to defeat the users of those black weapons.

"They were similar to Metal Vessels." Every head turned to him as he spoke. Sousei stood and placed a hand on Masami's shoulder, relieving her of her position. She gladly took it and sat down as he continued his explanation. "The powers they had weren't displayed fully, it seemed, before they were destroyed by our General. She told us that they were akin to the vessels but nothing like magic tools or any other weapons she had seen."

"The few we saw in action had powers similar to Haku-nee's and my own," Suisei explained. Sousei clicked his tongue at hearing her addressing Kohaku so informally in public and not stand before the imperial family. Really, he sometimes wondered how they were twins.

"To Beleth?" Koumei asked, knowing the names but not the distinct powers they possessed.

"No," Sousei clarified. "Beleth's and my own Household Vessel use sound magic. Marbas, and by default Suisei's Household Vessel, use strength magic. We weren't aware they would have such weapons or allies that possessed them."

Koumei turned briefly to his brother before lifting his head and nodding. "We understand that front, then. Now, could you explain how you overcame that?"

 _There it is._

Sousei knew that they didn't need to know much about the mission. At least nothing that concerned their military tactics. What mattered was how they came so close to failing and how they managed not to. His sister and he had already explained the former. To have answers to the latter was the only reason Masami had wanted Kohaku there in the first place. She had fought them off, single-handedly, even with her magoi so dangerously low. She had gone overboard, true, but in the end they had succeeded. He didn't see why the 'how' mattered anymore.

He eyed the rest of the advisors present, those that had been with them, mre intently than the rest. Some of them had seen what Kohaku had done and he didn't want them to badmouth her or undermine her abilities after what had happened. He didn't wish for her to lose face in front of the Imperial family even if she didn't care whether she did or not.

"It was the General." Both twins glared at the old man that had spoken up. An advisor that had helped Masami with their strategies, he didn't seem fazed by their looks and simply continued. "She went on a rampage and used her djinn equip. She ravaged through the enemy lines without care of who she injured."

"She ended the conflict," Sousei intervened.

"She acted recklessly," he added.

"She protected us!" Suisei added, jumping from her seat. Sousei thanked and cursed her at the same time. That was the one thing he wanted to avoid mentioning. And true to his fears, the old man used it against their sister.

"So it was her emotions that got in the way." He turned towards Kouen and Koumei, a grin on his face. "As I thought, your highnesses, having a woman command your armies was not a wise choice even if she is a Dungeon conqueror."

"She's fought her way through our father's acceptance as his replacement and conquered two dungeons. Gender had nothing to do with either," Sousei interjected. "It was her skill and her determination that got her as far as she's come. We follow after her command because of that; we are loyal and would risk our lives because we know that she would do the same for us and her soldiers."

"We had thought of retrieving after the loses we suffered," Suisei added. "She agreed and ran head first to soldiers to save them so they could return."

"She acted rashly. Had she thought out the strategy as a whole, none of that would have occurred."

Sousei gritted his teeth in an attempt to not rip the old man's head off. He was trying to bring their sister down at all costs. But they would fight back just as hard.

"She acted rashly." Both turned to Masami as she sat stoically, not facing anyone in particular. "But she also secured us the conquer. Had she not used her equip we would have lost the whole armada and, most likely, our family would be burying its only legitimate heir."

Sousei grimaced at that reminder and grazed his fingers across his shoulder, feeling through his clothes where he knew a scar had begun to form so close to his heart. "Kohaku did what had to be done and risked herself in the process."

"Besides we won," Suisei added.

He didn't disagree with her on that and nodded. "She might have been wrong in doing what she did and in how she went about it, but in our opinion, the results are more important."

There was nothing but silence in the room with neither of the opposing sides having anything else to say. The one that had the last word was their General Commander and First Prince. Kouen sat still with an expression that neither could read. From his vantage point, Sousei wasn't deterred from his opinion. He and Suisei stood together in this, and in her own way, Masami did as well. It was the one thing that their sister had taught them and what they would agree on no matter what.

"You stand with your sister's decision?"

Sousei narrowed his eyes at the one question their General Commander had voiced. He hadn't used her title because, in reality, it wasn't hers to take. It was their father's and eventually it would fall on his shoulders. He didn't want it, though, and believed that Kohaku was best for the task. More than Masami, the eldest, and more so than himself.

"I do; as both my general and as my family, I will always stand by her decisions. If we think she's wrong then we advise her, and she will listen. She leads with courage and a strong will, and we follow her because of it. And as she tells us every time before we head into battle, we will stand above all…"

Masami pursed her lips but had some fire in her eyes, that glint. Suisei grinned, her eyes sparkling with glee. Suisei remained stoic, but the corner of his lips turned up.

"And surrender to none."

The two brothers watched how close the three siblings stood together as a unit. Even without their General and sister present, they defended her with a fervor that both fascinated and intrigued Kouen. In a way, the oldest prince saw some of that same fervor in his own siblings, specially Koumei and Kouha. Neither spoke in his stead, there never was any need for it. But he believed, if the situation ever arose, they would do the same; they were family, after all.

Exhausted from the roundabout, he dismissed them with a wave of his hand. Koumei watched somewhat used to his brother's nonchalant mannerisms where trivial matters were concerned. Turning to the room as a whole, he spoke, "My brother and king has heard enough. There will be no punitive actions taken against what General Kohaku did in Hakucho."

"But I will have a word with her." Koumei turned, his curiosity piqued at his brother's request. Kouen eyed the siblings present before turning to glance at the empty seat beside Masami. "Relay that message to her; tell her to be at the library after dinner."

"Yes," the three answered, and the meeting promptly ended.

Sousei finally breathed a sigh of relief with the whole ordeal over but knew that they still had one last message to deliver themselves. Tapping Suisei, she blinked up at him before understanding what he wanted. From beneath her, she picked up a set of scrolls, ones that they had brought specifically for after the meeting. Thankful that the princes were talking amongst each other and slow to leave, Sousei hit his sister to follow him to them.

"What are you doing?"

He glanced over his shoulder to Masami whose brows furrowed in confusion. Sousei just thumbed towards the princes. "Delivering a message of our own."

Masami opened her mouth as if ready to ask what he meant when her eyes landed on the scrolls that Suisei held in her arms. Her lips pursed in clear discontent. "You shouldn't bother them with such idiocy."

"They'll need translators," Sousei retorted. "We can't be everywhere at once. Someone's bound to learn."

"Plus," Suisei added with a grin, "it'll be easier on Haku-nee, too, if there's more translators here in the palace."

With a smile of his own Sousei said nothing else and ushered Suisei forward towards the princes. Catching them as they were leaving, the two bowed in respect before going straight to the point.

"We don't mean to take much of your time." Sousei motioned to the scrolls in his sister's arms. "We wanted to give you these."

"Scrolls?" Koumei asked.

Suisei nodded. "The sign language that Haku-nee—"

"That _the General_ uses is in these scrolls," Sousei corrected. "We wanted for you to have them for translating purposes. It's more for the attendants or the like, we wanted them to be in useful hands." Sousei took them from his sister's hands and passed them along. "The Southern army as a whole and us know it, so if there are ever any problems, we would be glad to aide."

Koumei took them both, eyeing them curiously. "Of course."

The two bowed with thanks and excused themselves before they joined Masami outside. Sousei glanced up at the sky noticing that the morning sun was still high up. It was probably high noon by now and Kohaku had missed the meeting as a whole.

"She skipped…" Suisei sighed deflated from not seeing her the whole day. "You think we're going to train today?"

"Doubt it," he answered as they walked aimlessly following after Masami.

"Where could she be?" Masami pondered aloud, her fingers clasping down on the bridge of her nose.

"Could she be in bed still?" Sui asked coming closer to him and looping her arm around his.

He smirked down at her seeing as he was a few inches taller than all of them. "Could be but that would only be if she's feeling sick. She doesn't like sitting around doing nothing."

"She ran away then!" Suisei clamored, her eyes wide and mouth opened wide. Dramatically, she hinged from his arm making it harder for him to walk straight. "Haku-nee's so mean~ She should've taken us too."

Before he got anything to answer with, the two stopped when Masami turned to them. She seemed tired and a bit irritated, most likely from Kohaku not showing up. "I'll have a word about that with her later. What matters now is that she goes to that meeting with his highness." She turned to the two of them with a smile, "Would you do me the favor of finding her and telling her that message?"

The two smiled back at her and nodded. She thanked them and left saying that she needed some rest after such stressful morning. Sousei didn't blame her, it'd been quite a morning. And it was barely noon.

"You got any idea where she could be, Sou?" Suisei asked as she undid her hold on him and skipped on ahead.

"No, but she'll show up by herself." Sousei chuckled at the picture he got in his head. "She's like a cat, after all."

"A stray one, huh?" Suisei added with a scoff.

He laughed at that and nodded. The similarities were truly uncanny if he thought about it. Kohaku would roam far and wide if she was left alone. Most of the times they would find her coming in by herself later the same day or simply lying around either underneath or atop trees. The view changing was what she said as an excuse, it all depended on the vantage point.

And he couldn't agree more.

"We have plenty of time before dinner. We'll catch her then if she still hasn't gotten back. You want to translate for her during the assembly?" he asked with a raise of an eyebrow.

Suisei blew him a raspberry. "I hate political meetings. You go."

He'd guessed as much. "Then let's do something else, Sui."

"What?"

"Well, we still have a few more scrolls to deliver, don't we?" The smirk he gave her told Suisei everything. Before either of them said another word, they sprinted in their little makeshift race to their rooms. Competitiveness ran in their blood, apparently, and so far it was 45 wins to her and 78 to him. But the one with the greatest lead was Kohaku at 145, 89 of which had been won not in the best of ways.

He chuckled to himself as they gathered the scrolls they would go around delivering to the imperial family. Kohaku by far hated losing in any small contest and when cornered she was known to cheat…and she did that well enough.

"Who's first?" Sui asked as she adjusted the three she was holding. She hadn't wanted for him to carry the most which ended with her struggling with three and him with only two.

"Let's head to Princess Kougyoku first. I'm sure she'll be glad to have this," he answered with a sheepish smile.

"Yeah, keep saying that to yourself," Sui said with a shit-eating grin on her face. "It has _nothing_ to do with you having a little crush on her."

"Shut it, Sui!" Sousei shouted and hit her with one of the scrolls. It didn't really hurt but it got her laughing like crazy.

"You're such an amateur where love's concern. It's cute~"

"It's not cute. And shut up." He sighed and stared out towards the gardens.

Vague memories from years ago came to him of them playing with the kids of the royal family. Because of their age, he remembered only a few things. Some of them stuck out to him like when they would bully Hakuryuu and, of course, the times when they would play with Kougyoku and the yet-to-be third prince, Kouha. Back then they were weird kids, Kouha mostly. But Kougyoku was a shy little girl that he could not help but want to protect. They might not have seen each other for over a decade since but the feeling hadn't faded over the years.

Kohaku was the one he told first seeing as telling such thing to Suisei made him feel uncomfortable for some odd reason. He was twelve and she barely sixteen—a few months before the four of them entered Beleth's dungeon and three years before she lost her ability to speak—when he finally admitted to still having such feelings. It felt strange to even think that he could possibly have deeper feelings for a girl he'd known for a brief year and a half. Kohaku hadn't laughed like Suisei had when he told her afterwards. Instead she smiled but in her eyes there was a small glint of melancholy, one that he couldn't help but still wonder about.

" _It's understandable,"_ she said, one hand on top of his head as she ruffled his hair into a mess. _"There's all kinds of love out there, Sou, and what you feel for the princess is a kind of love only you can feel. Even when others may love her in a different way, only through you will she know the love you have for her."_

" _What if she doesn't like me?"_ That had been his biggest fear back then. At twelve, although he worried about a bunch of things, being rejected by the one girl he found lovely would tear him apart. The fear got less dramatic as he grew older but that didn't mean he still didn't have it.

" _It'll be sad, yes. But the love you have isn't a selfish one; in a way, it's unconditional. And if you love unconditionally, then there's a chance that you will get hurt but through it you'll learn. And when you learn you and those involve become stronger because of it. It's what I do and how I think about it, anyway."_

" _Do you love anyone like that?"_

The sadness in her eyes darkened their stark blue hue in a way that till this very day he never once has seen again. _"I love you, and Suisei, and Masami. I love mother and I love father. And I love my country, the world we live in, and the people in it."_

" _Is that the same, though?"_

" _The love I have for you all is unconditional. No matter what you do—no matter if you hurt me in the worst way or if you abandon me for all I'm worth—I will always love you. I'm strong in a way because of it, Sou. You're my family, not just the one I was born to but also the one I accepted."_

" _Accepted?"_

" _Yep. I've told you before, no? Each one of us living in this world has three kinds of families: those we're born into, those born to us, and those we accept into our hearts. I love you not just because you're my family but because you're you, Sousei: my adorable little brother. And when you love someone like that, you will have sad and happy times but one thing's for sure: you'll never regret it."_

Sousei held those words to heart since then. He fought for Kohaku and her ideals because he believed in the kind heart that she had. She disliked violence but fought when she needed to, especially when anyone she cared for was in danger. But in reality she was a gentle person and very opinionated at that. Losing her voice never lessened her way with words and actually made her get creative with them. She was a joyous woman that did her best to see the good in life and somehow brought courage to those who allowed themselves to listen.

The two of them had known this for a long time now and had pledged themselves to her beliefs and ways. There was a reason why only they stood as her Household Vessels. And not even a cataclysm would change that. He had faith that the love they shared as a family would always survive any atrocity that the world hit them with.

They would always stand above all and surrender to none.

* * *

Evening. It was already somewhat late by the time she began heading anywhere near her room. With the threat of another possible punishment hanging over her head after skipping that morning's meeting, Kohaku didn't want to face Masami just yet.

That thought brought her to change her course once more but by then she'd spent most of her time dillydallying everywhere. The palace was enormous so a full tour of the place would be impossible in one day. The city was even bigger and her little expedition after Hakuei joined her had covered only a tiny portion of it. The idea of asking Sousei and Suisei to accompany her next time floated in her head, they deserved a good vacation.

After returning to the palace that afternoon, she'd spent some more time with Hakuei which cut her exploration of the rest of the palace short. They met up with Seishun and Seijin on their way and she had a fun time teasing the boy about his new position. For now, she knew to hide him from Masami so she asked of Seishun to instruct him in how to serve a general. The rest of the time she spent with Hakuei and it'd been fun, so it hadn't been totally wasted. She didn't exactly pour her worries out to her like she'd wanted but some had come up, the most prominent being her little brother, Hakuryuu. Kohaku understood the worry at a personal level; surely, if either of the twins started acting out like that she'd be worried too. Perhaps the little prince needed a good and serious talk.

But that would have to wait. The morning and afternoon came and went fast and now that it was getting late in the evening, she mulled over what to do to tire herself. She liked keeping her days busy and boredom was the worst thing that ever happened to mankind.

At times like these she truly missed home. She would know exactly what to do were she there. The simple idea made her feel cozy and giddy inside. Yeah, nothing ever beat getting a good scroll on poetry or philosophy and sinking down in her…

 _Study._

Her feet stopped in their tracks and she couldn't help but remember the gorgeous study from the other night. Full to the brim with scrolls upon scrolls of subjects she had yet to discover. It would be so easy to just sit down while enjoying a good read and fall asleep to that. She'd have a hurting back by the morning but it'd be worth it.

Without another thought, she headed down the hall towards the study. It was early in the evening; dinner surely hadn't been served yet but it would probably be in the works already. She ate enough when she was out in the city and her appetite wasn't that big to begin with. She got chastised enough by her siblings about her bad eating habits but she didn't mind it. But with dinner so close to being ready, it would mean that there would be less people in there. She could have the place all to her own.

The thought alone…

 _I better run there before anyone comes butting in._

She sprinted, trying her best not to go on a full run towards the study. Thankful that no one seemed to guard the entrance, she slid the door open and closed it behind her before trotting through the aisles, her eyes wandering over every one and imagining what the scrolls could contain. Grabbing a few just out of curiosity, she trotted off to find a place to sit while picking a candle on her way. She found a small corner where a large cushioned chair sat beside a well-placed table. Picking one to start and laying the rest there to wait, Kohaku snuggled up against the chair letting out a relieved sigh before opening the scroll.

Military strategies: good topic to start with, she supposed. As half of her mind read enjoying the time as it passed, the other half wandered off to other topics.

Running away wasn't in her despite being a very instinctual person more often than not. But returning to her room meant facing Masami and her wounds from the night before hadn't healed enough for that. Giving them enough time to heal would be better.

Slight guilt came over her at remembering why she had skipped out on both breakfast and the meeting in the first place. Doing so had left the twins to face the interrogations on their own and although she trusted them enough to leave them be knowing they'd be fine, she worried that one day they wouldn't. Her tiny family, as nuclear as it was, had cracks that ran deep into its core.

The foundation—their parents—wasn't as steady as it appeared in the outside. The relationship between their father and the imperial family broke after the first emperor died. Kohaku felt pity for him the times she saw him so distraught and paranoid about the future of both the kingdom and their family. Her mother was a weak-minded woman taught to do as she was told. Prim and proper, much like Masami, she was a loving woman but didn't dare raise her voice no matter the burdens their father put on them. That was in public, though; in private, she stood on par with their father but it usually ended in verbal fights that didn't end well. With such inequivalent status in the family, there wasn't much surprise about how she and her siblings had turned out.

In her mind, the four could easily be divided in two categories: the instinctual and the rational. Suisei and herself fell in the former while Masami and Sousei took the latter.

Masami was cold and calculative. If Kohaku had to point out any of Masami's most practical qualities, aside from her fake charms, it would be her cunning and manipulative mind. Masami was more thoughtful of her actions compared to her. She formed contingency plans for each and every situation that they came across before even thinking of engaging. Where she fell short was under pressure, which she greatly excelled at. This dynamic had been what their father saw potential in and the reason why they had been sent to so many battles together: one as the tactician and the other as the manpower.

Sousei didn't fall much behind in the calculative department. The kid could see well through her when she would cheat her way through their vast number of little games and during training, not to mention his times in battle. He tended to think a step ahead of everything he did, at times even telling her how to go about some things. The crack he tripped most often on, though, was sharing his emotional state. He was a brilliant young man, there was no denying that, but he could never, for the love of everything sacred, be straight-forward about anything. He was the type to run around the bush unless cornered and forced to talk. Much like herself, they worked best under pressure but were laid-back and carefree if not.

For being twins, that Sui and Sou differed so much from one another amazed her. Despite being the older twin, Suisei acted like the baby of their family. Extroverted and open with her feelings to a fault, she was a strong believer in family values. This explained, at least to Kohaku, why she had been so respectful of their father's choice of putting Kohaku in charge of their armies. It seemed that no matter how much she respected Masami as their strategist and eldest sister, Sui held Kohaku's talents out in the battlefield and as general in a much higher pedestal.

Instinct versus rationale; that's all this family dynamic was about.

Kohaku—although she tilted towards the instinctual side more often than she would like to admit—tried to hold her place somewhere in the middle. She could be powerful and ravage through any situation if she so wished, but doing so would make her a one-trick pony. No use for a general who cannot do both strategize and fight. But she knew that what she was missing was what Masami possessed: knowledge. And between power and knowledge, the latter was more easily obtainable. Because of her competitive and curious nature, Kohaku could easily dig into books to broaden her expertise on what her army needed and for which they had relied on Masami for years. And when the day came that she understood those subjects and more, Masami would no longer be needed in their expeditions.

She could topple her older sister from the position she held as strategist. She could render her useless at least where conquering was concerned. And with her gone, Kohaku would finally have a place of reprieve: a true haven from her torment.

The thought of being safe from her sister's wrath made the studying worthwhile despite the boredom it brought to her. She hadn't kept track of time but by the time she'd finished her second scroll, a scuffling caught her attention bringing her gaze up.

She blinked her stark blue eyes up at the bright magenta that stared back at her. Déjà vu struck Kohaku at seeing Kougyoku, their meeting much to reminiscent of the day's before. This time she wasn't as extravagantly dressed, most likely she had been getting ready for bed seeing as her hair rested loose behind her and her robes slightly more sleep worthy.

"Y-You're—"

Kohaku's eyes darted away from the young princess to see the stuttering mess that was her attendant. Still dressed in his full attire, he seemed to have only been escorting her as he fell behind several steps.

"Anegimi?" Kougyoku murmured under her breath. It was only when she turned back to face her that Kohaku saw the scroll that Kougyoku held closely to her bosom holding it with both hands. Looking closer, it looked familiar, too, but before she got a chance to even ask about it, Kougyoku saluted her and bowed.

The man behind her started to panic at the young girl's actions, blabbering out like a madman. Through his stuttering, Kohaku watched perplexed at his presence so close to Kougyoku. "P-P-Princess, you mustn't—"

"Good evening to you, General Kohaku."

The mention of her title took her by surprise and her brow furrowed in response. Kougyoku stood straight with a small smile spread across her face, one that held a mixture of pride and glee.

"I wasn't aware…that you took over General Koujiro's armada. Then again, I suppose it's only natural seeing your talents."

 _Talents?_

The more she talked the more confused she became. Kougyoku's sight shifted from her to the scroll that she held cozily in her arms. A shyness that she recognized came over the young princess and lightly dusted her cheeks. "It's amazing, really, at least to me. Even with…well, you know—even without a voice you've gain so much respect from your soldiers, even from Suisei and Sousei." Her hands tightened around the scroll. "I find it truly amazing…the things you've accomplished. It…gives me hope, somehow."

 _Ah, I get it now._

That awe in her voice and that expression of fascination, it was the same one that she would see on the twins whenever she would take matters into her own hands. In a way, she understood Kougyoku's amazement. It was akin to the one she once held for Masami back when she was smaller, one that disappeared quickly enough over the years.

 _But hope? How? And…for what?_

Setting those thoughts aside for the moment, she pointed at the scroll that she still held so fervently close to her bosom. The princess's smile grew shyer and it made her hold it closer. "Sousei gave it to me." A grimace dampened her mood suddenly. "I asked him to tell me about what happened to you but he refused to tell me. Suisei won't say a word, either. They both told me that I should ask you instead and gave me this." She shifted between her feet in clear nervousness.

Kohaku turned to face the man that had been quietly standing behind Kougyoku despite the twitch in his eye. The staring made him visibly uncomfortable to the point that he grumbled something under his breath—clearly audible to her ears—before bowing. "I am Ka Koubun, Princess Kougyoku's vassal." At hearing this, she pointed at the scroll while giving him a droll stare. This made him stumble on his words even more as he flustered in frustration. "I-I have offered to learn it but the Princess—"

"No, it isn't Ka Koubun's fault," Kougyoku quickly added. "He did volunteer to become my translator but—" She stood firmly with a stern expression, her knuckles turning white from the hold she had on the scroll. "That's why I came here to brother's study, for references. I want to learn so that I can communicate with you like they do. Like everyone seems to be able to—I want to learn by myself so we can talk again like we used to, Kohaku-anegimi."

 _That's going to be hard._

More than anybody, she knew how tedious and arduous a task it was to learn her language. Hell, it'd taken a good six months to teach herself _and_ the soldiers fluently. People remember words because of sound, they're just easier to learn: you heard, you repeat. But her language demanded active learning; knowing what the hand movements meant and catching up with the speed of those who spoke it fluently was one thing. And it wasn't taking into account the various shorthand gestures she made up herself over the years. It wasn't that one person alone couldn't learn it…it was just incredible hard to do so.

But then again, she knew the best person for her to practice with.

Standing from her sit, Kohaku went over to the nearest chair and pulled it over next to her own. Kougyoku and Ka Koubun simply stared until she was done. Sitting back down, she patted the sit now beside her and smiled at the princess before she came over to take a sit. Taking the scroll so that it sat between their armrests, she laid it fully open. The drawings of hands, curtesy of Sousei, were depicted to represent the letters of their spoken language. Turning sideways to face Kougyoku, she signed one of the letters with one hand and pointed at the scroll with her other free hand. Kougyoku blinked in confusion for a few seconds before fumbling through the scroll.

"…S?"

Kohaku smiled and nodded before going on with the next and then the next letter. Kougyoku, though somewhat sloppy and at times confusing some letters with others, hurriedly figured out the single word that she was trying to spell out.

"…sweets?"

Proud of her work, she nodded with a bright grin on her face. Kougyoku smiled before turning eagerly to Ka Koubun who stood beside the two. "Did you see that, Ka Koubun? I figured it out—ah!" Ka Koubun staggered back startled by her sudden exclamation. "Ka Koubun, bring us some tea and sweets."

He eyed Kohaku briefly before obeying his princess. Once left by themselves, Kougyoku turned back to Kohaku, eager for them to continue. A few minutes into their studies, Ka Koubun returned with the food and the sweets looked as delicious as she'd imagined. She might not have the greatest of appetites but her sweet tooth never changed. "Thank you, Ka Koubun. I think that will be all for tonight, you're excused."

"B-But princess, to leave you alone—"

"I'll be fine. I'm not alone." He tried convincing her otherwise but Kougyoku was stuck on her decision and repeated herself several times before he agreed albeit reluctantly. Kohaku chuckled at the exchange and wondered where the girl got her patience from. The eagerness not leaving her as she prepared her tea, she turned back to Kohaku. "All right, I'm ready. Shall we continue?"

She couldn't stop the smile that came to her lips before nodding. They continued; to get her learning, Kohaku began asking simply questions about her day to which Kougyoku could easily respond to and focus more on translating. Despite what she had thought before, her time for dinner had been a few hours off. It was barely being served. Kougyoku didn't give her a straight forward answer when she asked her why she'd skipped it, she only stammered with the vague explanation she gave.

A good hour went by before their small lessons were interrupted.

Kohaku heard the footsteps before the doors to the study even opened. She turned up prompting Kougyoku to do the same as a pink head darted into the study with night clothes on. Similar sparkling pink eyes stared down at them as the young boy tilted his head, a smirk appearing on his lips.

"Ah~ What's this?"

Kougyoku's eyes widen in surprise and she smiled at seeing him, "Kouha! Good evening, brother."

The third prince eyed the pair as they sat silently staring back at him. Kouha trotted over to his sister before leaning over her with his head atop her own and peered down at the scroll. "This thing? You skipped dinner for this, Kougyoku?"

"Yes," she replied before cradling it in her arms and trying to remember the signs by memory for the moment. "Kohaku-anegimi is helping me learn it."

"Really?" Kouha eyed said woman for a second with an aloof expression; she only stared back smiling. He turned away and scoffed, "Why bother? I'm having Junjun, Jinjin, and Reirei learn it for me. It's much easier than learning such useless thing myself."

 _Oh, really…?_

Annoyed about the jab at her language, she signed at Kougyoku. Remembering the more distinct letters and only glancing down to make sure of a few, Kougyoku said what she'd translated, "Foolhardy." Kohaku nodded and pointed at Kouha, a smirk on her lips. "You're calling brother Kouha foolhardy?"

"Ha?" Kouha exclaimed before standing before Kohaku rather defiantly and giving her a glare she returned with that never-fading smirk. "Who're you calling foolhardy, you mute hag?" Her eye twitched at the name calling and she pointed at him again not willing to fall for such childish play. That only made him scoff. "Oh, yeah? Like you're any better having to speak stupidly with your hands like that." Kouha mocked her signs with his hands and stuck out his tongue.

 _Oh, no you did not just do that, you pretty brat._

She signed away much too quickly having forgotten that Kougyoku, still learning, was having trouble following the speed. "U-Um," Kougyoku glanced from Kohaku to the scroll and back again, greatly confused by how her signing with both hands made the letters meld together and made it much harder to translate. "A-Anegimi, please, slow down."

"Give it here." Kouha snatched the scroll from Kougyoku's hands before trying his best to follow behind her hands and haphazardly translate what she was saying. "Who're you calling a knucklehead?!"

"Oh, wait." Kougyoku pointed at something on the scroll before turning back to her. "I think she's using a shorthand. This one, here." Kohaku watched as Kouha studied the scroll and grumbled something under his breath. He argued with Kougyoku as the two tried to figure out what she'd said.

Waiting for them patiently, she enjoyed the view of them together. Despite being siblings of different mothers, they seemed to have warmed up well to each other over the years that she hadn't seen them. Being the same age, it didn't surprise her much. What did was the fact that they were so different from back then; Kougyoku wasn't as shy and secluded as before and Kouha, well, from what little she'd just seen, his violent tendencies had shifted over to a more perky but still quite vocal personality. Kohaku didn't disagree with it, simply thought it was quite nice to see such good changes in children she'd taken a liking to those years ago.

"Ah." Her train of thought was interrupted when the two spoke up with clarity in that single syllable. Kougyoku gave him a smile as Kouha averted his eyes with a childish pout. "Don't think I'll forgive you easily about calling me a lazy bum just because you called me cute."

The strange reaction made her blink before laughing, the air passing through her throat making a wheezing sound that surprised them both. Her laugh subsiding, she signed in reply.

" _With that face, you're even cuter."_

* * *

Koumei took a deep breath, feeling full from just having eaten, but midway a yawn caught him off guard. Aside from work, eating made him rather tired too but sleep eluded him like always. This time the culprit was a meeting, one that his brother and king had assigned since the morning and now that dinner had passed, it was time for it.

At recalling the face of the woman he had asked for, another thought riled into his head. It was an actual question laced with his own curiosity at a person so bold—or stupid—to skip a meeting with his brother. "She missed this morning's meeting. Do you think she's brave enough to skip this one, too?"

The wording made Kouen scoff. "If she does, it won't be bravery. It will be blatant stupidity."

Koumei couldn't agree more. But he found it both perplexing and astonishing that a person would dare leave such an impression on the first prince of her own country. But in his opinion there was some sort of mixed impression, good and bad. The good came from her siblings' actions and words which, although he thought idiotic to voice aloud with such confidence, reminded him too much of himself and Kouha, and even Kougyoku to some extent.

But that was only what those underneath her thought and that mattered little if anything. What would define where she stood and what disciplinary measure, and to what extent, would be taken, it would be what she gave as an excuse in this night's meeting. He just wished it over with so that he could rest, truthfully. But as they approached his brother's favorite and private study, hurried footsteps made the wood floor beneath their feet tremble. They were running, fast, and towards their direction as they reached the door. It was sudden enough to make them stop briefly.

"…sure she's this way?" a panicked voice asked. Koumei vaguely recognized it as the youngest Reizei daughter.

"Believe me, when she laughs it's distinctive." He recognized the other voice as their only son. Both seemed to be heading to where they stood. "Sounds like a wet bag with holes deflating."

"Ugh, way too much information, Sou," she replied.

"You asked," he retorted. "And I may not have her stupidly accurate hearing but I can focus enough to know, and I know what she sounds like. Haku-nee's near—" Koumei watched slightly perplexed as the two turned the corner and screeched to a halt, Sousei's color visibly paling while Suisei grimaced before stepping behind her brother. "Y-Your highnesses!" He bowed sloppily as did Suisei. "W-What a coincidence. We hope you're having a fine evening."

Koumei glanced up at his brother who simply scoffed from the obvious distraction and watched from the sidelines as he tore through their façade. "Just in time, I see."

"I-In time?" Suisei inquired.

"Your sister's circumstances require a translator. You are here for that job, are you not?"

Koumei watched as the two flinched visibly under his brother's scrutiny, something that wasn't that surprising. But what perplexed him had been the reason he gave them for their presence here. Before he could question them, though, Sousei spoke regaining some of his lost composure.

"Of course, your highness. We told the General of your request and she humbly accepted. She also wanted to apologize for not having attended this morning."

As he spoke, Kouen noted the slight slanted posture he held. With the foot that was lifted from the ground he tapped the floor. It would be innocuous and he himself would have ignored it had it not been in such meticulous sequence. His attention came back to them when the older twin spoke up.

"Y-Yes, she was deeply sorry about missing it this morning. She's still not well, you see, from our trip back from the battlefield," she made gestures with her hands to exaggerate her words. "Injuries and all."

Knowing it as a ruse but trying to be courteous, Koumei lowered his fan to face them fully. "Is that so?"

"Yes," the two answered in unison, surprisingly not losing a beat.

Sousei's foot tapped a few more times before he cleared his throat and smiled. "She's waiting inside, your highnesses. She prepared for the meeting the afternoon after we told her about it, seeing it fit after missing out this morning."

"Very well." Kouen didn't waste any time thereafter and promptly opened the door for himself. Koumei followed suite with the twins coming up on the rear. The closer they got to the deeper part of the study, the more they heard voices which was odd when Koumei and Kouen easily recognized the two.

Coming into the study, they spotted Kouha and Kougyoku talking with the General, who smiled as she signed slowly for them. Kouha replied with an attempt to translating with Kougyoku giving her own input and glancing down at the scroll on her lap for reference and to correct themselves. Even before they entered, Kohaku's head turned sideways before she glanced up from the siblings in front of her.

Following her line of sight, the two stood up at seeing their brothers and promptly greeted them. Kohaku stood languidly from her sit and did the same, smiling.

"En-nii, Mei-nii," Kouha spoke up before skipping over to Koumei. "Great seeing you!"

"You skipped dinner," Koumei chastised, "again. Both of you did."

"I ate too much in the afternoon, though~" He pointed behind himself to where Kougyoku still stood beside Kohaku while the twins quietly made their way to their sister's side in the midst of the family talk. "Besides, it's not like we spent it lazing around. Right, Kougyoku?"

"Yes," she exclaimed, beaming with pride. "We learned plenty from anegi—I mean, General Reizei. We only just started but she said we're doing quite well and that she'd keep teaching us more in the following days, too."

Koumei glanced over to Kohaku as she stood expectantly, not at all nervous or fidgety after the fiasco from the morning meeting. Nor seemingly flustered about a meeting they both knew, from what they overheard of the twins' conversation, she hadn't known about. He ignored this the best he could before he spoke, "You should not bother yourself, general."

She chuckled before replying, _"It really is no bother at all."_ She cringed visibly having forgotten that the two oldest princes didn't know her language fluently or even the smidgen that the younger ones had learned. But before she could rectify her mistake, Kouha and Kougyoku translated the sentence close enough to what she said, clashing here and there on one word.

"And even if it were, they have us to practice with, too," Suisei added and clung onto Kohaku's back out of the blue. She winced but hid it as quickly as she could, not noticing in her effort that Kouen had caught a brief glance of the gesture.

"We would gladly offer our expertise to you as well, your highnesses," Sousei continued with a much politer tone. "That is if you find a need for it."

"Of course there won't be any need for it," Kouha boasted with a dismissive wave of his hand. "En-nii and Mei-nii won't need you bunch to learn something as simple as that."

" _Of course not. It's so simple, in fact, that you keep confusing my vowels. Any moron could learn it, right?"_

Kouha sneered and felt his eye twitch in slight irritation at catching half of that sentence. "Care to pass that by me again?"

" _Of course, my dear prince."_

Kougyoku giggled behind her sleeve at the cute name while Kouha kept egging her on without really gaining anything from it. Having had her fun, though, Kohaku stopped and patted for Suisei to climb down from her back. Doing so, she turned to Kouen and Koumei.

" _I digress, however. It appears we have more important matters to attend to."_

Sousei promptly translated for them. Koumei found the need for a translator rather obnoxious but necessary in his case. He was about to mention the actual necessity, or lack thereof, for his brother and king but before he could his brother spoke.

"Indeed we do." Striding to his desk, he went to take a sit behind it leaving the rest to stand. Koumei followed and stood by his side. Not knowing the reason but wanting to stay and listen, Kouha and Kougyoku stood to the side of his brother's desk while the twins remained to Kohaku's right side before it. The line was drawn, she noticed, and everyone stood in their respectful places.

Koumei gave her a small summary of what was talked about in the meeting before ending it with this, "Most of what occurred in Hakucho was explained thoroughly by the reports and by your siblings, but there are still inconsistencies that remain. The black weapons, for example."

Kouen stared at the young woman that stood firmly and undeterred, a smile, calm but tense, lingering on her lips. She raised her hands and signed as Sousei translated. _"Those weapons were strange, to put it simply. They possessed powers akin to those of Metal Vessels but they seemed to conjure power from another source, one different than normal rukh."_

"What makes you say that?" Koumei asked.

" _Their sound."_ Kohaku chuckled at the perplexed looks that Kougyoku and Kouha gave her before she continued her explanation. _"I might not be gifted like a magician to see it but because of Beleth's power, I can hear the rukh. The white rukh tend to be a calm beating, the black rukh are much more uncontrollable and frenzied. I knew because I heard it."_

"Anything other than that?" Kouha asked curious himself.

She shook her head. _"Their powers were based on magic similar to any other magician's. The source was different, though, and from what I heard, it seemed that Hakucho was plunged in an ocean of black rukh. It explains why they were so resilient even as my soldiers dwindled their numbers. I was forced to use most of my magoi to clear a path for them but even then they remained strong. They seemed to draw from this other rukh in a way I've never seen before."_

"Your brother mentioned you being dangerously low in magoi when you decided to intervene," Koumei mentioned while hiding his face behind his fan. "How did you stop them after being weakened to such a point?"

" _I drew what little magoi I could from the noise around me. I was slightly on edge at the time I made that decision and it made me overuse my powers unnecessarily. So I admit it was, to put it bluntly, idiotic of me to act so rashly."_

"It was," Kouen spoke up and sat straight in his chair. "You lost over two thirds of your soldiers because of your inadequacies. You may have captured Hakucho but the numbers lost should not have gone past a quarter."

" _I am aware of that. And I blame no one but myself, as well. The moment I saw the opportunity to end it, though, I didn't hesitate. I used what magoi I could gather and djinn-equipped."_

"What makes you so sure no one survived?" Koumei asked curious.

" _Sound is everywhere. The moment I released Beleth's magic, I controlled the vibrations in the air, including the ones in their heads. Their deaths were swift and precise. And I heard them die. Unless they could counter or protect themselves with magic, they fell with that attack."_

Silence came over with that finality that she put in her words. Koumei was slightly impressed that she had such answers at the ready. From the little conversation the twins had had on their way to the study, it seemed that they hadn't told Kohaku about his brother requesting such a meeting with her. And yet, be it by coincidence or actual planning, she was here and ready with answers to every question.

It was true what his brother and king had said during the morning meeting, punishment wasn't something they were aiming for. Neither was it any sort of disciplinary action although in this case it was highly adequate. What they wanted, especially his brother, was the information that they could only get from her. There had been only a few sightings of these weapons: one in Balbadd during the revolution that had taken place half a year ago and the other from Prince Hakuryuu himself when Hakuei had told them about his conquering of Zagan. Nothing much had been reported about either case.

In a way, this was the closest to any valuable information that they had gained about them. Even this, though, was not much. Koumei knew this and it only made him more tired knowing that there would surely be a need for scheduling serious research into the matter. That was a hell of its own that awaited him in the future. Sleep seemed farther away still.

Noticing that there didn't seem to be any more questions, he raised his gaze up to the three siblings. "Is that all you have to say about Hakucho and the enemies you encountered there?" Kohaku only nodded. Koumei sighed, his shoulders slumping down. Perhaps the meeting would end sooner than he thought. "If that's all, then—"

Kouen raised his hand to stop his brother and eyed the three siblings with that stoic look of his. Sousei and Suisei seemed uncomfortable under the scrutiny but Kohaku didn't seem fazed. She actually reciprocated the same gaze from the night before, one that said she was trying to figure his thoughts by attempting to decipher his expression but failing miserably at it. She didn't let it show, though, and instead stared back with an unflinching owlish stare, her expression slightly bland.

"You accept that you committed various errors in your latest campaign." He asked the question but it didn't come out to sound like one.

She nodded.

"And can you clearly state them?"

" _Rashness. Negligence. Miscalculations. Inexperience during such situations. But if I had to pinpoint one in particular, it would be the latter."_

Kouen's brow raised slightly at that note. "Not your rashness?" She shook her head. "So that you carelessly went in wasting your army's most valuable weapon before there was any necessity for it is not the major issue you see in your actions?"

" _I agree that I was wrong to use it so early without a need for it; miscalculation, from my part. It links back to my inexperience. I've only had my father's position for a little over two years and most certainly don't have the expertise, say, your highness has. That, added to my negligence of the enemy and of my own knowledge of strategy, greatly hinted towards the results we got. All in all, I got the short stick of the bunch, if you can excuse my language."_

Kouen remained quiet taking in her words. "And your careless disregard cost many of their lives. That will not be allowed to prevail. You are hereby ordered, under my command, to shorten that gap of knowledge you lack."

" _Highness?"_

"Study, general," he clarified at her perplexed expression. "This library, along with the rest in the palace, contain strategies and accounts of battles, both successes and failures, that have taken place over decades of Kou's history. History is the perfect teacher for such cases as yourself. What you lack you can learn and excel in it. It's a matter of putting the effort to reach that state. Do I make myself clear?"

Kohaku blinked for a few seconds before giving a firm nod. Good, he liked the fire he saw in her eyes. It showed that, in the very least, she wouldn't be one to be dampen by one loss. He may have yet to see her real potential in battle but the accounts of the soldiers, strategists, and her own right-hand captains gave him some idea. From them he could gauge what she naturally carried in her arsenal as not just a general but as a soldier as well, and also easily figured what she lacked. Now that those pieces were placed on the table it was now a matter of harnessing what she already had and letting her obtain what she lacked.

Kouen had said what he wanted to but one thing did bother him enough to ask. "One last thing, general." Kohaku's gaze lifted up to meet his, stark blue staring into crimson tainted gold. "All your expeditions have been nonviolent unless explicitly necessary, or so I've been told. Yet on this one, you acted upon your captain being injured. Could you explain your behavior to me on that particular circumstance?"

At this question her eyes widened in the slightest, the stark blue color paling against the light. She lowered her gaze before lifting it to glance at her younger siblings. It shifted then to Koumei who was surprised at the compelling yet gentle look before it came over Kouha and Kougyoku who had simply watched silently. Only after this did her lip curl up in a small smile.

Returning her gaze to him, the smile broadened and she lifted her hands before signing what she wanted to say. He saw her fingers move but heard nothing. Only after she was done did he turn his sight to Sousei and Suisei who stared, stupefied, at the words that their sister had said.

Not giving any other answer, she turned towards the twins and snapped her fingers getting their attention before signing at them. After finishing, she turned to the four of them and bowed, her fist inside her open palm.

Sousei stuttered, the shock from before still sticking to him. "U-Um, she says that she will certainly take your generous advice to heart, your highness, and that she will begin first thing tomorrow. Again, she apologizes for her imprudence this morning and assures you there will be no repeating such disrespectfulness."

"Yes, well, it seems we're done," Koumei replied, slightly confused at what had just happened. "You're dismissed."

The three bowed one last time, bidding them goodnight. Before completely leaving their sight though, Kohaku signed at Sousei who stammered with his hushed reply but after some convincing he turns back and walks before Kougyoku and Kouha. Giving a bow, he stands tall over the two. "My sister asked me to escort you back to your quarters, princess. T-That is if you so wish and allow me to."

Kougyoku tilted her head slightly puzzled but with a gaze over Sousei she watched Suisei and Kohaku as they smiled, the latter nodding in assurance before they disappeared behind the door leading out. With a giggle she turned back to Sousei and nodded. "If you would be kind enough."

"I'll head out with you, too," Kouha quipped up, placing himself closer to Kougyoku and walking out with his arm hooked around hers. As they headed out, he kept giving the younger boy side glares when Kougyoku wasn't looking and the three exited the study as well, leaving only Koumei and Kouen behind.

Koumei watched as his brother slouched back into his chair and languidly opening the scroll that he had left there since the morning. Koumei eyed it and knew the contents but still needed to put it in practice. His brother and king, however, had taken most of the day to learn and memorize what the scroll contained which in his case wasn't hard to begin with.

"Neither translated," Koumei noted with a yawn. "But seeing as you didn't ask them to, I'm assuming you know what she said."

"Go rest." The sudden change of topic puzzled him but when another yawn came, he didn't really question him further.

"If you insist," he responded. "Don't stay too late, either, my brother and king. It'll be pointless to go to sleep then have to wake in the middle of the night to come get you out of here so you can rest too."

Kouen scoffed but didn't let his eyes wander from the scroll he read. "Goodnight, Koumei."

The reminder that Kouen was still his older brother, no matter the title, was always welcomed. Despite how much they both accepted Kouha, Kougyoku, and the rest of their half-siblings as family, blood was still thicker than water. And the two of them, being full brothers, was what stuck most of all. It was only when they were alone that such things surfaced and he held that rather close.

"Goodnight, brother."

Left alone with only the various candles strewn about lighting the vast study, Kouen busied himself reading the scroll that the Reizei twins had given him that same morning. He had mostly memorized it since then, truly it wasn't hard to, but he found it somewhat fascinating the strange way that it so fluently turned into a language of its own.

One that he had grasped how to understand rather quickly.

There hadn't been any need to translate what Kohaku said because he'd more or less done it in his own head. The only reason he had gone back to the scroll was to make sure that he got it correct. And he had; what irked and fascinated him was that the answer she had given was pretty much what he guessed from the smile on her face and by the way she had slowly signed each word out, enunciating them for clarity.

" _I'll phrase it simply, your highness. Had it been_ them… _would you have done any differently?"_

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _ **Well, this went better than expected. Took a while but it was worth it cx 15k word doc, 24 pages. I couldn't be happier. Can't say that all chapters will be this long but here's to hoping :3**_

 _ **Anyway, this is the second chapter but there's already a good handful of people that have been waiting for this. So let me first thank those who have Favorited and Followed this story:  
\- Twilight Dark Angel  
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**_

 _ **And also to the three awesome people that reviewed!  
\- Miqila  
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 _ **Now that that's over with, I hope this is enough for you guys to have for now. I'm not sure how often the updates will be although I have a vague outline of the story. And since I'm taking a few trips in December, there might be little updates next month. I'll do my best though c: Anyway hope you enjoyed and hope you stay tuned for the next chapter!**_


	3. Paroxysm

_**Chapter Three**_

 _Paroxysm_

* * *

" _It's dark out. We should go back soon."_

 _Her tiny head moves to face the girl beside her, eyes paling against the moon's light as she stares. "But I want to stay out here a little while longer with you. Can't we?"_

" _They'll be mad. And, well, they'll worry too."_

" _They will, won't they?"_

 _She sighed. It'd been awhile since they spent time like this together, alone. Here, they weren't a high-class girl and attendant. Here, they were just friends. She liked that, and missed it greatly during the time they spent apart. "Did you…miss me?"_

" _Of course I did!" The girl's eyes brightened with glee at hearing this, her cheeks warm and heart throbbing madly. "You're…my best friend. And besides, I would never leave you alone. We made a promise, no?"_

" _Yeah," she smiled and nodded, "…we did."_

 _But at times when such darkness lurked and seeped in the world around them, she wondered just how much longer that promise would hold. How much longer could she remain happy or pretend to be with everything else being so horrible?_

 _The young attendant jumped up to stand and reached out her hand, smiling. "Come on, Kohaku. Let's go home."_

 _Home…yeah, it's right to call it home. It was theirs. And so long as they could be together, no matter the sadness that was within her, she could overcome it. So long as she had her, it seemed possible. And frankly that's all she needed._

* * *

Kohaku watched from afar, entranced as the two boys skidded across the training grounds. Seishun, using a normal sword instead of his Household Vessels, talked Seijin through as the small blonde awkwardly stood and held onto a sword of his own. He parried a few strikes before shying away, risking a hit to his exposed chest. The exchange in itself made her smile. Leaning against the wooden threshold, she let her eyes linger on the sight of the two training so early in the morning, just after breakfast.

It reminded her of how she trained with the twins, something she still owed them. And even more, it reminded her of her own days of training, those few that she'd received from Prince Hakuyuu himself. The memory somehow calmed her down but as she let herself relax, she felt the raw burning sensation of fresh welts, this time on her thighs. As expected, she'd been punished for her deliberate defiance but she didn't apologize for it. Instead, she relished in the fact that from all the bad, something good had happened: she found Seijin.

She stayed until the two ended in the afternoon and welcomed them with glee. She thanked Seishun with a nod. The young vassal assured her that he had taken the time to learn her language for the princess's sake, and although he wasn't as proficient as her siblings, he was decent enough in a day to catch the meaningful words.

When he stumbled on one, it started to get a little irritating that she had to repeat herself. To her complete surprise however, Seijin spoke up.

"The General said that she would be sure to compensate you for hard work, Seishun-dono, and that she's thankful to both you and the First Princess."

Kohaku and Seishun stared at the young boy with wide eyes, shocked and amazed. Wanting to proof what they were both surely thinking, she signed.

" _You…understand me?"_

"I do," he replied after a brief pause.

" _How?"_ she asked.

"I learned from the scroll that Sousei-sama and Suisei-sama lent me." He glanced down at the floor, staring intently at the wood, before mumbling something to himself while his hands mimicked the signs she'd just done with an eerie accuracy. "Yes, I'm positive this is what you meant to say. Was it not?"

"But…" Seishun let his mouth remain open for a second before pursing his lips. "That can't be. We received those scrolls at the same time last night. How did you learn it so well in such a short time?"

At that his eyes widened before he sheepishly stared at his feet, clearly embarrassed. "It's…something weird about me. I'm sor—"

Before he could even apologize, Kohaku grabbed his shoulder to get his attention. _"Don't be. It's not weird; we're just amazed. Could you explain how you did it without any help and in such short time?"_

Seijin lifted his gaze and his mossy green met stark blue. "It's just—I have good memory."

"How good?" Seishun asked, curious.

Seijin pursed his lips for a second before answering. "It kind of just works by itself. I can…remember anything I read or see." His hand reached up to his head and scratched at it, nervous, as his eyes shifted to the side. "It's weird, I know."

" _It isn't."_ Kohaku patted his head making him stare up at her again. _"It's amazing."_

It made her happy to see his lips quirk at the corner, a smile wanting to come to them as he nodded. It bothered her to think that this was probably the first time anybody told him such thing. With such valuable information, she began telling Seijin how it'd be much easier for him to adapt to her needs this way. That was, of course, despite the fact that he needed serious help with training. That the mind remembered was much more different than the body remembering.

Walking over to the rack of weapons, she picked a staff in her left hand before pointing one end at Seijin's hand with which he still held his own sword. _"Pick it up, Jin. If you're making such an effort to learn, then I'll take the effort to teach you what's truly hard as a General's vassal."_

A grin came to him and Seijin nodded, ignoring the odd nickname she gave him. She ignored the pain on her legs just the same and walked him through several maneuvers using Seishun as their living training dummy. Kohaku found it hard to learn herself but she found early on that teaching others came rather naturally. It was one of the reasons why she personally trained Sousei and Suisei with their Household Vessels and, she supposed, why so many of her soldiers always wanted to spar against her.

As the morning turned to early afternoon, she found herself exhausted and her pain all but forgotten as her body came alive with the light exercise. _"Good job, Jin. You did well."_

"Thank you, Miss General," he said, while taking all their weapons and putting them back in their place.

Kohaku thanked Seishun and dismissed him before turning back to Seijin as he came back to her. _"Kohaku is fine. I mean, I'm already calling you something like Jin, anyways. Besides, honorifics aren't my thing."_

Seijin pursed his lips before giving her a half grin. "Then, Miss Kohaku is fine, I presume? It would be rather inappropriate for a servant to call you so informally, after all. At least that's what Seishun-dono told me before."

" _I suppose so. But mark my words, you'll get used to it. Few tend to call me by my title. Even my own soldiers tend not to."_ Sort of. Then again, the replacement they used—Lady Reizei—wasn't that much different. _"But don't think I'm pushing you. You do what you find comfortable for you, Jin."_

He chuckled before saluting and taking a bow. "As you wish, Miss Kohaku."

She smiled. He was peculiar and she liked that. He was different and she liked that, too. He stood out in much the same way she did and that gave her some kind of comfort in the solace she usually found herself in. And that made her more certain of her decision to take him in.

Days passed and she arranged her schedule accordingly to better suit the changes in her life at the palace. No new orders had been given to any of the Generals present, her or Hakuei included, so she stuck to the notion that her days would remain free for the time being and worked from there. And surprising her further was the fact that, despite being in such hectic schedule, things didn't seem to slow down.

She wasn't bored.

And time passes fast when one isn't faced with such monotony.

* * *

"Miss…?"

 _No…_ She swatted at a hand poking her.

"Miss Kohaku…?"

 _Let me sleep._ She swatted harder at the hand that touched her shoulder.

"Miss Kohaku, it's Lady Masami. She's coming this way."

Instantly, Kohaku snapped her eyes open, jumped from her chair, and started scanning the place. But, thank goodness, the library was empty.

 _Wait a minute._

Library…?

She heaved a sigh, letting her tense shoulders relax. Peeved at what he'd done to wake her, she glared back at Seijin, the blonde flinching at the unnerving sight.

"S-Sorry, but you told me to wake you if you fell asleep, Miss Kohaku."

" _Did I now?"_

"Yes," Seijin assured her with a smile. "You said you wanted to study but that you weren't sure how much you could remain awake, so you instructed me to do this. And I quote 'don't let me sleep even if I hit you'." He grimaced and rubbed at his jaw, "Which, by the way, you did a few minutes ago."

 _Oops._

She apologized about that and chuckled. Situating herself against her chair, she picked the scroll that had fallen when she fell asleep before continuing to study the tactics in it. During interims where she couldn't understand some jargon or strategy, she would sign at Seijin to find a reference to it. They had been at this since after breakfast and it was already late in the afternoon. Wanting some rest, she asked him to bring them both some treats to pass a few minutes with. As they enjoyed their tea and pastries, Kohaku mulled over how far the kid had gotten. What her mind lingered most was how fast time had gone by. She let the aroma of the chamomile tea sink into her along with the fact that a month had already gone by without consequence.

It baffled her how much her and the rest of her family adjusted to life in the palace. Sure, they'd been here before but it certainly was different now that they were older. But the world was so easily prone to change as were they as humans living in it. And after eleven years surely things were bound to change.

Seijin had been a nice addition to her little clan, for one. The boy had learned much from Seishun and, although it took some time, he adjusted to the twins and their antiques. And of course, the amazing skill of his helped him greatly in his studies and in her own.

"It's nothing special, really," is what he said when she complimented him.

But it was. And Kohaku sought the fruit that such valuable mind had and did his schedule accordingly. The mornings he spent with Seishun doing physical training while the afternoons were spent with her studying battle tactics and strategies. To her surprise, it only took him a couple of days to fully learn her language which made it far easier to communicate with him.

Speaking of talking, after the serious talk that she had had with the first prince, Kohaku had made it her priority to learn all she possibly could. Learning such things had always been something she kept in mind in order to one day find her haven from Masami. Now it was something that had to be done. Not only because she was told to but because she never wanted what happened at Hakucho to happen again.

The short month they'd spent in the palace so far had also been good for Sousei and Suisei. Since the day she began to teach them, Kouha and Kougyoku wanted to continue their lessons, but because of how hectic her schedule was now with all her studies, it left her less time to practice with them. So instead she suggested an alternative. The twins could easily help them with it; after all, they had offered since the very beginning. Through the days the four of them would spend time learning from one another; at times all four together, at others in pairs when only one was available. Sousei usually took Kougyoku but Kouha interchangeably got either. It made her happy to see them get along so well after so many years apart. Many a time did it remind her of the peace they had before the fire, before everything changed.

And for them, this change of pace was most likely appreciated. They were just children—although, she supposed that they would always be in her eyes—and they had gone through far too much war and violence to last them a lifetime. They needed a rest and it seemed that spending time with the prince and princess helped them acclimate.

As for Masami, she remained rather quiet to her surprise. After the night of the meeting, there had been no subsequent beatings, at least no severe ones. Because Kohaku had done nothing but stay true to her word of working hard, Masami had no excuse to beat her around. Of course, she hardly needed one when she would simply use her own anger as an excuse to do it. Those she didn't understand but she didn't mind as much as the others. Regardless of reason, she didn't dare fight back. After all, she knew the consequences if she ever took action. But thankfully the days passed on without trouble.

And ever since the meeting she hadn't seen either of the two eldest princes. Perhaps in passing during the morning she would catch sight of Koumei but other than that the two were elusive to her sight. Not that she was eager to meet them again.

Perhaps what Kouen asked at the end of that meeting still bothered her. It was true that she'd never acted so rashly before but the fact that Sousei had been injured had changed everything. At that moment, there wasn't any right or wrong thing to do; at that moment only two things mattered, Sousei and killing those who'd done him harm. In retrospect, it hadn't been the smartest choice but she didn't regret it. But after days of replaying the fight in her head, she couldn't help but be bothered by their enemies, and more to the point those that she knew had managed to escape her attack that day.

But then the logical part of her brain, the one that was starting to thrive with so much knowledge, told her that it'd be better to let those things be for the time being. There would be no use in worrying over such issues when they didn't have any right answer. Deciding to turn in for the night, she instructed Seijin to help her put the scrolls away as the evening became darker outside.

"Miss Kohaku?"

Kohaku turned with a yawn as she rubbed her stiff neck. _"Yes, Jin."_

"Was your routine this hectic before coming to the palace?"

" _Hardly."_

She smiled at remembering the days from a couple of years ago before being sent out into battle. The days before her father fell ill and when she still held no significant stance in her family, something she rather enjoyed. Despite already having captured both Beleth and Marbas, their father didn't deem her fit for commanding an army. The fact that she was a woman was the least of his objections. The most prominent one was that she was too soft. He'd seen her pacifist way of dealing with problems and how she seldom resorted to violence to achieve her goals. Kohaku didn't understand what he despised more: that she refused to use methods that had worked for him and the emperor, or the fact that her unorthodox approach actually worked most of the times. It hadn't been until after his sickness, and a hellish test, that he approved of her taking his place as General of the Southern Subjugation Army.

And that didn't compare to the hell that entailed living under Masami's dogmatic thumb. Thinking back on it now, she would much rather take their father's bigotry over his own daughter's grisly torture.

But Seijin needn't know about that. Nobody needed to know.

" _It's late, Seijin,"_ she pointed out as they headed to her room. She brought the thick robe over her frame as she felt a chill down her spine. Fall was already midway and the chilly temperatures were hitting during early mornings and late nights. _"You should go rest. You've got another day ahead of you tomorrow."_

"I suppose I do," he replies with a mumble. "Will I be learning anything new?"

" _I've told you before, it all depends on how far you come tomorrow."_ It's a question he asked often since she started training him much like the twins would. _"Maybe it'd be better for Sou, Sui, or Seishun to train with you before I go any further."_

"You mean because of their Household Vessels?" he asked, his interest piqued. With a nod as an answer, he glanced down at his hands. "Is it hard to be a Household Vessel?"

" _Ask them. I wouldn't know."_

"Then is it hard being a Metal Vessel user?"

Kohaku stopped briefly at the doors of her room before shrugging her shoulders nonchalantly. _"It's something I chose. Can't really complain even if it were."_

"Almost makes it sound like it does," he mumbled before covering his mouth and saying a small explicit under his breath. "I was out of line, my apologies."

She shook her head and waved her hand dismissively before patting his head. _"Don't be. Your truthfulness is quite refreshing. But let us part ways here, it's getting late. Goodnight, Seijin."_

He smiled before bowing. "I bid you goodnight, my lady." With that he left to the servants' quarters where he was being housed and Kohaku entered her room ready to turn in for the night. Despite the training in the morning, her muscles had tense considerably not being used to such leisure after two years of battles. The training was too mild to be any good and she doubted that training with the twins would be any different.

None of them really fought her the way it should be. They held back, pulled their punches, and she hated being treated like that. Seijin was new so she understood where he came from; he was just learning and his hesitations were something to be expected. Suisei was rough but because her style was more playful and taunting, she was easily predictable. Sousei could fight against her well if he put himself to it but he seldom did. His efforts were spent elsewhere, such as providing support rather than damage.

And the fact that with her acute hearing she had a very distinct _cheat,_ it made it hard for anyone actually trying to fall on par with her abilities.

But such thoughts quickly fled her mind when she noticed something beyond the paper screen that separated her parlor and bedroom. Pushing the screen aside, she watched as Masami sat on her bed, back against the headrest, and her prying eyes reading through the pages of her journal.

Rage took over without her realizing and she strode over snatching the bound book with force. Masami glared up at her, appearing slightly peeved, but made no move to retaliate. Instead she stood up and walked to the other side of the room. "Studying hard, I presume."

Kohaku didn't affirm nor deny her statement. Something was odd about Masami. Anyone with an ounce of intelligence could see that. What she wanted to know was what caused her to be like that.

Masami toyed with something that she hid beneath the sleeve of her hanfu before turning to Kohaku with a frown. "Have you spoken to father about your current state of affairs?"

" _Why would I?"_ Kohaku scoffed at the question that came from nowhere. How much free time did she think she had, really? Ignoring the annoyance that somewhat sprung from Masami, she sat at her bed and started undoing her clothes to change. _"He's recovering, and the fact that I'm studying won't help him."_

"Is that so?" she asked, incredulity clear in her voice. "Then would you care to explain this?" Kohaku caught the movement by the corner of her eyes and stared at the parchment that now laid open on her bed after being haphazardly thrown there. Her eyes quickly scanned what was written.

It was word from their mother about their father's state. He was getting better apparently, slowly but surely. She sighed in relief at reading that but the relief quickly ended when she read the last part. It was a direct order from their father: he had decided that even after his betterment that Kohaku would join him on future battles as his second-in-command.

 _That can't be._

Her emotions hit her like a storm. They ranged from an odd sense of joy to skyrocketing uneasiness. Even the joy was mixed in with some doubt. Because of their father's narrow-mindedness, she had never expected for him to accept her as anything else than one of his daughters. He barely recognized that she had been powerful enough to conquer two dungeons—that being with the evidence right in front of him—which was why she doubted she would ever reach anything other than being an interim general while he recovered. But now, be it from his own recognition or resignation to the facts, he wanted her to permanently remain as part of his army. He wanted her to be part of what their country took most pride in—their military prowess.

That, in itself, made her unimaginably happy but at the same time it rose her anxiety levels through the roof. And it wasn't because she wasn't sure of her father's reasons, those were by far the least of her worries. What did worry her—or more like who—stood right behind her, frighteningly silent.

"Congratulations, little lamb."

Kohaku's whole body tensed up at the coldness that struck her at hearing those words. They hadn't been loud, barely a whisper, but they frightened her nonetheless. Turning her body fully, she froze at finally seeing what Masami had been hiding.

 _No._

The silver carnation hairpin from her journal, the one she had failed to notice missing, was now in the most destructive hands she knew of. Masami held the dainty object in her hands, her fingers holding each end separately and bending the metal as far as she could. A taut smirk played at her lips as she tightened her hold a little too much before releasing the tension on the hairpin; the glint in her eyes became ever so brighter each time when she saw Kohaku gasp and her eyes widening in horror.

"Father must really see potential from what you've accomplished in such a short time." Kohaku's eyes never wandered off from the pin as Masami spoke and walked towards her. "And of course that you're learning here in the palace under the First Prince's orders would capture anyone's attention." She spoke slowly, methodically, and enunciated her words with every step until she stood a few feet before Kohaku.

She watched, her eyes wide, knowing her precious possession was but arm's length away and yet afraid that if she even breathed at her the wrong way, Masami would destroy it. So instead she stood still.

Masami held the hairpin between her index finger and thumb before dangling the thing precariously feet above the ground. It wouldn't break and some part of her brain knew that but she couldn't keep her fear from raising as it slowly slid from between her fingers.

"Too bad you're rejecting the position." Her eyes widened when the hairpin slipped out of Masami's grasp but was caught fast enough before it fell. "Isn't that right, lamb?"

Kohaku only nodded.

"Good girl." A sweet smile came to Masami's face as she tossed it her way without any warning. Scrambling to react, Kohaku caught the hairpin and held it close to her bosom, relived beyond words that she had it back safe. Her fears gone, she turned up to glare at Masami who was already half way across the room. "I just wanted to make sure that you and I were on the same page and that the letter wouldn't get you any ideas. You don't belong out in battle or in public. Neither do those djinns nor whatever strength father sees truly belong to you. And you know why that is, don't you?"

Kohaku glared daggers at Masami but knew the answer to that question: nothing belonged to her. Meeting her eyes, Masami smirked before turning towards the door and waving back at her. "Glad we could come to terms, little lamb. Goodnight."

The sound from the door _clacking_ closed pierced her ears. She stood in her empty room still fazed by what happened. Her fingers caressed the silver carnation emblem on the hairpin and the leaves sprouting from each side. Cold as it was, it held a warmth that couldn't be replaced.

She'd been stupid to leave it unattended and unhidden from Masami. She'd grown so used to her routine that she foolishly forgot about not having her journal and the hairpin with her at all hours of the day. It had been normal back at home where Masami had full reign to traverse their residence without consequence. Here, Kohaku had thought her roaming would be minimal in order to not catch attention. But, then again, if she was crazy enough to punish her in the palace then this didn't seem as impossible anymore.

 _How could I have been so stupid…_

Unable to let it be and still feeling the lingering fear of Masami coming into her room, she vowed to find a better place for it. Kohaku understood that no matter where she may place it, Masami would find it. So the best way to hide it would be in a place where she would be unable to reach it—a place where, even if she could, she wouldn't touch it.

Her mind wandered off to every possible place as she drifted in and out of sleep, holding the hairpin close to her chest. As the metal warmed to her body temperature, her mind dwelled on one possible place to hide it—or more like the right person to hand it to.

* * *

 _Damn me and my exaggerated thoughts._

All night, she'd thought of the perfect place, or person in this case, to help her hide the journal and hairpin. She couldn't risk having it put in danger because, as Masami had shown her the night before, she wouldn't hesitate to break it to pieces. She wouldn't allow that. And thankfully, if everything went well, it wouldn't happen. She had thought that having that to look forward to the next day would give her some peace of mind but it had done the complete opposite. She slept mere hours out of anxiety and because of all the unexpended energy she had, the lack of sleep hadn't done anything to her. But her mind was exhausted beyond belief.

And if that wasn't bad enough, she woke before the damn crack of dawn. Not wanting to go back to sleep knowing she wouldn't anyways, she thought a stroll could help her unwind. Of course, the journal and hairpin were snug between the folds of the simple hanfu she wore. Choosing the eastern extremities of the palace, she walked along the outer barracks. Because of the ungodly time only a few people were awake. Mostly servants, they went about quietly preparing themselves and starting their tasks for the day. Rounding the stables, she headed out towards the expand where the largest trainings grounds where.

As she went into the place, she marveled at the grandeur of the place. Half of the training grounds were outdoors, which was where she preferred to train, but most of them were small, enclosed areas. The mere size of this one, though, made even the largest indoor grounds pale in comparison. Easily more than half the size of the eastern palace, it amazed her as she continued to walk through it that it was connected to the forests that bordered the northeast of the country.

This could very well be used for arduous kinds of training. The thought of the twins and their usual routine came to mind; surely, whenever they brought the issue back, she could suggest this place to use. Walking further into the forested area of the grounds, she took a deep breath and enjoyed the sounds of all the nature around her.

The fleeting wings of birds—real or otherwise—calmed her lingering unease. Following a trail, she walked not expecting to meet anyone but the deeper in she walked, the more a certain noise began to reverberate in her eardrums. She stopped beside a tree and leaned against it as she turned her ear towards where she heard the faint sound.

 _Clank._

 _Clank._

 _Clank—clank._

… _metal?_

It had to be. It was hitting…a tree. The distinct noise made from metal against wood was a bit hard to discern but as she began to walk in its general direction, she recognized it for what it was. A sword striking bark. Skipping her way and avoiding the roots and boulders in her way, she treaded beyond the beaten path and towards the sound. It didn't take long for her to find it and the person who had so forcefully slashed their sword's edge against hard wood.

From behind, all she saw was a broad back clothed by white and black robes. Fiery red hair laid loosely on their back slightly held back. That alone gave away the person's identity although it would have been ridiculous to mistake the man for anybody else but him. Taking different stances, she watched from afar as Kouen slashed, pierced, and stabbed the bark of the tree. The force of each hit made the metal quiver but his firm hold quickly ceased the noise that reached her ears. Each hit bared the tree of its bark as the sharp edge or point marked its place. And with each movement of his body, she could hear the stark sound of his movements.

Her hearing was keen to the point that she could easily hear the muscles in his body as they contracted. She also heard the start of each contraction a second before he moved. And if she really focused—just as she started to do by closing her eyes and letting her hearing sharpen—she could even hear the blood running through his veins, the pumping of his heart as it rushed the blood through, and his controlled breathing as he prepared each stance and subsequent hit.

In its own strange way, it was rather pleasing to listen.

"You would do well to know not to intrude on others. It's uncouth."

The baritone tone rushed into her ears and engulfed her. Akin to an ocean's waves, it consumed her with her honed hearing and sent chills down her spine, she opened her eyes and lifted her head. He had turned her way but was still where she last saw him. From what she heard, though, he could as well have been whispering in her ear from how his voice reverberated.

She couldn't deny being caught, so instead she gave him a sheepish smile and approached him. When she was close enough to be seen, she bowed out of courtesy.

" _My apologies. I didn't mean to interrupt."_

She cringed forgetting that no one was there to translate for him. To her surprise, though, he looked elsewhere before plunging his sword onto the ground and letting it stand by itself. "You stood there for quite a while, breaking my concentration. Whether you meant to or not doesn't matter now. It's done."

 _Well, excuse me._

Wringing her hands together, she grinned fearing that if she were to actually answer she would just be digging her grave deeper. Her eyes wandered away from him and found the small pile of weapons that he kept leaning against another nearby tree. They were few: a couple different swords, a polearm, and a wooden staff.

Unable to help herself, she closed the gap between them completely being ignored as Kouen busied himself with cleaning the sheen of sweat that covered him. Bending over, she picked the staff; out of the bunch, it resembled her weapon when equipped with Beleth. Although the weight distribution between a normal staff and Beleth's weapon were quite different, she guessed that the style of fighting used between the two was relatively the same.

"Is that your weapon of choice?"

Caught off guard by the sudden question, Kohaku turned with a raised eyebrow. Kouen began exchanging it between both his hands and testing each, the metal ornament dangling from the hilt as he moved. Choosing his left, he tightened his grip on the hilt before charging.

But she heard it before he moved. Feinting to the left a split second before, she evaded the assault before twirling the staff up to the side to defend against the subsequent slash against her right side. He held steadfast, the sheer strength of his hit making her shake in her feet for a moment. Her eyes narrowed and she straightened her staff to let his momentum pull him down but he was too smart to not notice. He pulled back before she could even raise her leg to knee him once he began falling down.

Kouen stood a few feet away, still in stance, and measuring her up from head to toe. Intently listening, Kohaku took her own stance holding the staff parallel against her left forearm. "Fast on your feet, I see."

She smiled sweetly with a tilt of her head before signing with her right hand. _"Cheap shots seldom work with me."_

"Is that so?" Kohaku heard it again, his muscles contracting, but this time had a harder time getting her body to react to the quickness of his movements. She clicked her tongue as all she could do was guard against his attacks at the speed he was going.

Goodness, for being such an imposing man he could sure move fast. His strength was something she couldn't begin to contend against, either. Each blow carried a heavy impact and no matter how great she was at predicting his moves, if she kept being on the receiving end of such forceful attacks she would tire before even landing any counterattack.

 _Okay, change of plans._

Kouen threw blow after blow not leaving her a moment's reprieve. On the last hit, though, instead of defending against it, Kohaku sidestepped before crouching down and thrusting the staff upward from beneath him through the opening she saw. Sadly, she clicked her tongue when he fended the hit away with his other hand and redirected his sword towards her. Backing away in a panic, the edge of the blade nicked at her shoulder as she made some space between them. But if he wasn't letting her rest then neither would she.

 _I'm not about losing to anyone. Much less you, little prince._

Taking a step back, she let her grip slip from the forefront of the staff and held it near the end. Not wasting a breath, she sprinted around Kouen as he repositioned himself while she dragged the staff along the ground making noise as it hit against the floor. Catching him by the side, she brought her staff down as hard as she could. Kouen was quick enough to block the attack and felt his sword quiver from the hit while hearing the humming of the metal from the impact.

Kohaku grinned as she quickly changed her grip on the staff, holding it properly again, before twirling it against her arm to strike low at his side. He blocked yet again, feeling the quiver and hearing the humming. The smirk didn't leave her lips as she continued with the dance she'd posed against him. Gyrating the staff around and aiming on different spots of his body, she whirled and spun every which way she could in a myriad of attempts to catch him off guard. On every turn and twist, though, he was quick to block not letting her get to him.

Kouen began to think her idiotic for repeating the same attacks when she clearly saw that none where reaching him. But it didn't take him long to realize that something wasn't right. The more he guarded against her attacks, the more noticeable his reaction times got. That wasn't possible; he knew his body and had trained it enough to know exactly how fast he could react. But as he continued to parry her attacks, and because there was no way she got faster so suddenly, he couldn't ignore that he was, in fact, getting slower.

As the humming of metal against wood continued to buzz in his ears, he understood. He had to stay away. Leaping away from her on the last blow she dealt, he brandished his sword out to stop the metal from quivering and the noise from reaching his ears.

Lifting his gaze to meet hers, she smiled, a taut line on her lips, before she skipped back and stabbed her staff against the ground to propel herself up. It wasn't much but it was enough to allow her to kick at the air, swinging her foot across in a line in front of her. Sensing the slight change in pressure before him, Kouen didn't hesitate in raising his sword and calling for Astaroth. The sword heated in his grip as white flames burst from the hilt enveloping the blade. Bringing the sword down in a clear strike, he sliced through the attack that came straight at him—a sickle-shaped gust of sound that he slashed in half as it reached him—and heard it clash against the trees behind him.

Kohaku watched entranced as the white flames on his sword cut through the wave of sound she had propelled his way. Using a small portion of Beleth's power, she had caused rapid enough vibrations to create the sharp, blade-like gust of sound. But she was amazed he caught on to her so fast and knew to use his djinn's powers to counter her own. But she hadn't expected to catch him off guard so easily, either. He was their Commander General after all; she had to give him _some_ credit.

Brandishing the blade with the flames still licking its edge, Kouen raised an inquisitive brow. She did her best to hold back the laugh that threaten to escape at seeing such expression on his face. And since she hadn't seen any other than his passive and rather contemptuous look, it made it that much harder.

"I wasn't aware we agreed on sparring with djinn."

" _I wasn't aware we agreed to spar at all."_

"It was an assumption," he replied, glancing down at his sword. "Seeing as you took a weapon, I thought it a good opportunity to test your abilities for myself."

" _Other's testimony isn't enough?"_

"I find eyewitness testimony unreliable at best," he said and flaunted his sword, this time with his right hand. "But I don't find this terribly inconvenient. If this is how you wish to show your capabilities, then continue."

Kohaku pursed her lips, mulling over what he proposed. Training like this—Metal Vessel user against Metal Vessel user—didn't sound as bad as she thought at first. Sure, their powers clashing could be destructive but luckily they were pretty far out to fight on equal level without causing significant damages. And as hard as it had been at first, she had to admit that this was quite fun. And if she was going to finally have some time to relax and tire herself out then she would, by all means, take him on his offer.

" _Then how about this?"_ Tossing the staff aside, she reached for her feather pen instead as it laid laced in her bun hair, making the eight-pointed star appear on its surface.

 _If you would, Beleth._

She heard both Beleth and Marbas chuckle at the back of her mind, finding her little bout of energy refreshing. The djinn's deep voice resonated in her head with his answer, _"With pleasure, my king."_

Holding it in her left hand, a line of golden light sprouted from the feathered pen as it transformed into her djinn weapon equip. A shakujo—sounding staff—manifested itself in the pen's place; made of gold with small rubies encrusted on the rings, the staff was of solid black wood with a gold end. Holding it parallel against the length of her whole left arm, the rings ended above her head as their chiming rang through the air.

" _Would it be much to ask for a fair battle then? Weapon equip against weapon equip. Your flames against my sound."_

He didn't answer but instead let the flames consume the blade almost as if charring it with its intense heat. The rather normal, albeit elegant blade morphed into a much larger, longer, and exorbitant sword. Edged in black and coated in some gold and silver, an intricate design ran from the hilt were a symbol lay and traveled along the blade with the eight-pointed star most prominent.

"Very well."

Not missing a beat, she had to force herself to tumble away from Kouen's sudden strike. He'd sprinted to close the gap between them and she had heard it but had to force her body to listen to her brain. Before she could turn around and stand, she heard his muscles contract again and knew he was coming towards her.

 _He's not joking around anymore._

Not trusting herself to react fast enough, she brought her staff up to block the swing of his sword. She held her stance as she stood back up, holding his blade in place against the upper end of her shakujo and staring up at him as they stood face to face. The rings on the circlet of the shakujo shook from the force of the clash and she easily controlled the vibrations, lowering the timbre.

His eyes narrowed and he brought the blade of his sword against the circlet effectively stopping the noise from the rings. "I'm not falling for that twice."

 _Apparently so._

Breaking them from the standstill, she stomped down on the floor giving herself enough propulsion to jump fairly high and away from him. Kouen's momentum broke and the blow from his sword struck the ground; glancing down at the rather deep hole left behind from both hits, his eyes followed the dainty woman that had landed gracefully quite a distance from him. She grinned and waved her staff over her head jokingly making noise with the rings. Not letting him take advantage of the distance between them, though, she began swinging her staff, making more noise, and this time forming it into more blade-like gusts that shot his way.

The change in pressure gave it away for him again. It was more than one this time and they were converging towards him fast. Not having time to avoid them, he struck through them as they came. If Kouen had to describe her fighting style from what he kept seeing, 'annoying' wouldn't begin to hold a candle to it.

Her movements and body control were smooth and precise. Her strength was nothing out of the ordinary, but she compensated well with what other assets she possessed. The fact that she not only could mess with his body and mind with her sound somehow but could also readily, and rather accurately, predict his attacks said as much. But as she continued to bombard him while changing her position, it became clear to him how to end the child's play.

Rushing through the blades and cutting them down as he went, he dashed forward to her. The action made her hesitate for a second. Kohaku could hear the muscles that contracted and it told well where he would strike next: the left side of her body, the most exposed seeing as she was now.

 _I'll risk it and put up a wall. Even if it goes through, the resulting shockwave of it breaking will draw us both back to how we were before._

It was the safest bet when she didn't know what he planned to do afterwards. The moment she saw him dart towards her, his sword ready for the strike, she positioned herself to procure the sound wall. That was until she felt something rigid against the left side of her hip. At remembering her journal, she froze.

Seeing her hesitation, he took the opportunity to emblazon the blade with the same white flames from before and went for the hit; this would end with his victory. Kohaku locked her jaw, her eyes fleeting quickly between the blade and the short, nonexistent, distance between them. Not taking the risk, she pounded the ground with the heel of her foot to propel herself out of range but the hesitation cost her. Instead of slicing through her side, the blade cut against her thigh with the white flame searing her skin and clothes.

She cringed and grinded her teeth at the pain as she somersaulted away from him. Her focus on the journal and hairpin, she grabbed at her side making sure they were still there and did well to ignore the throbbing burn on her thigh. What she couldn't ignore were the white flames that kept licking at her exposed skin now that the left half of her skirt was being consumed by the small fire.

Not wanting to be left half-naked or for it to reach the book, she took it out of her clothes a moment before knocking the end of her staff down. The molecules that ignited the fire dispersed from around her fast enough to leave the flames with no oxygen to burn around her body, ultimately putting the fire out. Her leg buckled slightly from the pain but she was more worried about the left lower side of her clothes being nonexistent.

Kouen watched from afar as she struggled to draw her clothes down and over her exposed body while holding with the other hand both the staff and journal—an object he hadn't realized she was carrying until she pulled it out from the folds of her hanfu. Realizing their sparring was over seeing as she was otherwise preoccupied, he undid the djinn weapon equip before walking over to the flustering woman.

The broad blade that was flaunted in front her face as she looked down on her scorched thigh shocked her. With cheeks lightly dusted from the shameful display and her eyes glinting with resentfulness, she glared up at Kouen as he placed the cool steel against her thigh.

"Phenex."

Kohaku watched intrigued as the ornament that she'd seen dangling from the hilt of the sword shone and depicted an eight-pointed star. A small, rose-colored bird emerged from the blade and hilt ornament and spread its winds brushing gently against her burned skin. A sensation of coolness and relief rushed through her and she looked, eyes wide, as the scorched skin vanished letting flush skin emerge in its place. Kohaku was amazed and intrigued at the same time; was it healing the wound, or expediting the process itself? Life magic had always been interesting to her but this was more seeing as in a few seconds the burns from the flames completely disappeared.

Finding it easier to stand now with a fully healed leg, she stood straight and glanced up at the prince. She was about to thank him when all she saw was his back as he walked back towards the weapons. A tick at her jaw started at his aloofness as he busied himself with sheathing his blade than with her after having fixed damage he caused.

"You're a fair opponent," he said, packing up everything that he'd brought with him as he knelt down to do so. "Too distracted and fidgety but those are fixable problems."

The tick got bigger. _I can't tell if he's complimenting me or simply belittling me in a very subtle way._ Her inner struggle over which it was got interrupted when out of blue a handful of clothe got crammed into her already full hands. Startled a bit by the abrupt action, she glanced down at the black cloak in her hands. Glancing over her shoulder, she only saw the broad back of the men who'd just left her without much of anything except some advice—she hoped—and a way to cover her indecent state.

Dispelling Beleth's weapon equip, she placed the journal and feather pen down on the ground before wearing the cloak properly. It was overly huge but it would do until she could get back to her room and change clothes. Picking up her belongings, a stray ray of light hit her eyes making her shut them and turn cautiously to its source. From between the tree canopy she faintly saw as the sun rose above onto the sky.

Dawn had barely broken through when she stumbled upon this place and with Kouen. Had they really sparred hours into the morning? If they had, she hadn't noticed and the thought somewhat gladden her. The things that took her undivided attention like that were few and far between, much fewer the ones that did so for such a long time. Instead of feeling discontent or abashed from the events before, she felt satisfied…as strange as that sounded.

Shaking that out of her head, she strode back to her room hoping that the palace hallways were still empty enough to allow her time to change and let her keep some sense of dignity.

* * *

Seijin blinked at the object he held in his hands: a bound journal with a hairpin sticking out from between the pages. He lifted his gaze, mossy green eyes full of bafflement meeting determined blue.

"Safekeeping?"

Kohaku nodded.

Well into the evening, the two were at the study: Kohaku with four open scrolls, cross-referencing information, and Seijin working to bring her any other things she needed. She had talked about a special task that he would do for her, just before they hit the four-hour mark of being there, and handed over her possessions to him.

In her eyes, this would be best place to keep them. Seijin wasn't only a vassal of the Reizei Household, in their terms he was a servant. Harming or threatening those who served under another was prohibited in Kou and even punishable. Masami wouldn't dare touch or interrogate Seijin about her belongings even if she knew he had them with certainty. Although she felt bad to an extent for using him for such thing, she also wanted to keep her things safe. And if she had to use Seijin for something as selfish as this then, well, so be it.

 _Sorry, Jin. I'll make it up for you one day._

" _Will you do this for me then?"_

"Of course," he answered with a sigh. "And I know there won't be an answer even if I asked what it was, so I won't bother. But will you want to know where I'll be keeping them?" She nodded and agreed to tell her once he'd decided on a hiding spot.

" _And remember, if you open it I'll know."_

A chill ran down his spine not just because of the underlying threat in those words but because of the sweet smile that she had while signing that sentence. "I won't. I swear." Their routine went on for another hour and as they were packing up to leave, the doors of the study swept open and two figures ran up to her almost tackling her down.

"Haku-nee!"

Kohaku chuckled as the twins hung from either side of her with huge grins on their faces. Suisei's didn't look much different but Sousei's definitely marked the glee that he had about him. Before she could ask anything from them, they beat her to the punch. "Congratulations!"

She frowned but froze slightly at remembering Masami's little conversation from the night before. _Oh, please don't let it be that._

" _What for?"_

"We heard about mother's letter!" Suisei exclaimed, squeezing her arm from the excitement.

"You're going to be father's second-in-command," Sousei added with a smirk on his face. "That's amazing."

"That's beyond amazing!" Suisei said, jumping up and down. "It's a miracle."

Kohaku couldn't help but chuckle nervously at the happiness they shared for her accomplishments. Even Seijin at hearing the news clapped and congratulated her as well. But as elated as the little pseudo party was she had to cut it short before they got too ahead of themselves.

" _I'm not taking the position."_

The instant they read her signs, they stepped back and stared dumbfounded. "What…?"

She gave them a wry smile, knowing they wouldn't like this. _"I can't take it."_

"Why not?" Sui asked.

" _It's not mine to take."_ Knowing it was a cheap shot but that it would work best to convince them, she turned to gaze at Sousei.

Noticing this, he frowned. "No, you're making a mistake if that's your reason."

" _It belongs to you, Sou."_

"But haven't I told you that I _don't_ want it!" he exclaimed, livid at her blatant stupidity. Suisei stood between the two as a clear line was drawn between Sousei and herself.

She knew how much Sousei hated to be reminded of his future, of how he'll eventually end up chained to responsibilities that he didn't want. He didn't want to lead an army. He didn't want to lead their family. And he had told her his reasons and worries as to why he wouldn't take the position even if it were offered or shoved down his throat.

He'd rather follow than lead because, as she learned from him, his biggest fear was making decisions he would later regret.

Taking a deep breath, Sousei frowned but she could see him clearly holding back a glare. "Don't do this, Kohaku. I don't want this."

" _I can't, Sou. Please…understand that."_

Yelling an explicit at the top of his lungs, he stormed out of the study with Suisei crying out for him in worry. She stared back at Kohaku with a perplexed look before running out after her little brother. Feeling torn from having done something like that to him, she sighed. Not wanting to dwell on it and promising to herself that she'd talk it over with him on another time, she and Seijin finished cleaning up after themselves before heading in for the night.

As they walked to her room, Seijin, a few steps, behind spoke up. "May I say something, Miss Kohaku?"

" _Sure."_

"What you did and said…was it perhaps for their sake?"

Kohaku slowed down as those words struck. _How perceptive._ Smiling over her shoulder, she reached out and ruffled his hair.

" _What makes you say that?"_

"Nothing in particular." Seijin reached up to lay a hand on his own head. "Although, maybe it's the fact that you were so calm while telling them your answer. Frankly, I was surprised that you would reject such a good position, too. The fact that you gave such poor reason to answer them with surprised me more but made me understand something too. It's almost as if…" He shook his head unconsciously.

" _As if what?"_

"…as if you did it on purpose. As if you…knew the reason but rather than say it you opted to keep quiet." His brow furrowed as he said each word slowly as if trying to decipher what his own brain was coming up with. "Almost like…you wanted to protect them from…something." The more he spoke, the more she noticed that she had done a good job at choosing him for her vassal. Perhaps much too good of a job.

But instead of giving it away, she grinned and shook her head. _"You're thinking too much into it. Sousei knows I'm right, he's just being stubborn. I'll talk to him later about it and get him to understand."_

Seijin nodded but still looked confused. Not wanting to dwell more on the topic, she excused him from his duties early and got to her room by herself. Once inside, she leaned her back against the far wall before sliding down to huddle down into a ball.

She hated upsetting Sousei or Suisei. This one hurt most seeing as it wasn't even her actual decision. If it were, she'd be a little more motivated to make him understand. But it wasn't. And no matter how much she hated either outcome—not being second-in-command and shoving the task onto Sousei whom she knew wanted nothing to do with it—she had to enforce the decision.

If she didn't, Masami would surely…

 _Don't think about it._

* * *

Sleep had eluded her yet again. But her mind, as blank and distant as it was, had wanted a distraction and guided her to the only place where she'd gained that over the past month in that place. But neither sign of Kouen or his weapons came as she reached the secluded area. Still somewhat dark out, she could hear the cries of the crickets as they went about and even heard the rustling of smaller animals as they came and went.

In the hopes of blanking her mind out she went to train but he wasn't there. And not having slept at all the night before added to her unstable state of mind. She wanted a distraction. Something—anything—to keep herself from thinking about the problem she'd caused.

Exhausted in both body and mind, there was no clear leash on her and she just wanted to let go. Every so often it tended to happen. Having no voice took away an option of distress; she couldn't scream or have a tantrum. But destroying things was always a second best; it's what she's good at doing anyway.

Dreadful thoughts surged forward and before she could think it through she spun on her heels and punched whatever laid behind her. Her bare knuckles struck the bark of a lone tree, ripping through her skin's surface. Neglecting the slight stinging, she continued throwing punch after punch with the same result: the bark laid intact while her fists became more and more bruised and bloodied. As she carried on, she began adding kicks and scraping her feet more and more. The pain increased but she kept ignoring it.

She just wanted to destroy it.

But her hazy mind only saw her blood marring the bark that stayed unblemished from harm. That just made her angrier. It was like everything else; no matter how hard she pushed them they would always shove her harder back—where she didn't want to be.

 _I don't want to lie to you._

Her ears caught the miniscule cracks that resounded from her right hand and fingers. That last punch must've cracked something.

 _I don't want to cause you pain._

Kicking it with her left foot, she felt the impact cut deeper, staining her shoes and the hem of her skirts red. She could see pieces of the tree sticking into the wound, deepening it.

 _But that's all I keep doing._

Damn it. Her ire rose, her strikes getting more forceful with her emotions. Why wouldn't it just fall already?

 _ **Marbas!**_

At her order, dark purple energy coated her hands and feet silhouetting them as claws and talons. Feeling the surge of powers her emotions gave her through Marbas, she turned and with the momentum back kicked the thickest part of the tree's trunk. The claws on her talons slashed the trunk, cutting it across and cleanly through. Panting, Kohaku watched with narrowed eyes as the tree began falling, causing a cacophony to pierce through her ears as animals ran away from the ruckus. Before the trunk touched the floor, she punched a clean hole through forcing her magoi through a single spot and cleaving through it once more, even rupturing the ground beneath it.

The energy on her hands and feet crackled and began surging upward wanting to engulf her in the raw power. It felt good to unleash like this with such unhindered power. It's why she loved using Marbas when she fell to her lows.

Beleth was a destructive djinn in its own kind but it was controlled, precise strength that required thought.

Marbas was a completely different kind of cataclysm; it was unfettered, feral, and simple, pure power.

She couldn't destroy the things or people that held her back. Reason kept her from doing that. But she could ruin other things and she used its powers to surrender her sanity for power. Marbas took away her control and freed her.

But the feeling was short-lived and it left her with something worse than anger: emptiness. The energy receded from her arms and feet until it disappeared onto the tips of her fingers and the soles of her feet. It was only then that she could hear Marbas and Beleth talking, soothing her mind. Exhaustion caught up to her and her legs buckled underneath her as she fell to a sit.

As her mind returned to her, she began feeling the pain of her wounds. As sanity came back, she began to think about the things that mattered.

Sousei was angry. Even after calming herself somewhat and going to see him before going to bed the night before, Suisei had been the one to come out and tell her that he didn't want to talk. Kohaku hadn't pressed on.

Suisei was understandably struggling to choose a side; she held family beliefs higher than anything but choosing one over the other clashed with the beliefs she was taught and those she was born with. Kohaku knew that Sui couldn't choose to be completely on her side even when she knew it was the right one, solely because she didn't want Sousei, her brother—her twin—to be sad.

And Masami simply watched everything from the sidelines. Kohaku hadn't thought about it since she was pretty preoccupied with seeing after Sousei and her own ravaging emotions, but she had found it odd that the twins had found out about their mother's letter. Being the youngest, there was no point in giving them the message to relay. No, if anything their parents would've addressed the letter to Masami, first and foremost. And yet they found out that same night.

… _she must have told them._

Feeling rather idiotic for not having seen through that earlier, she slumped down and laid against the ground, dirt, and leaves.

Of course Masami would do something like that. Despite how much she hated it, Kohaku admitted that they were playing two very different games. She always played her pieces as they presented themselves to her, always being moved by events and people that stood directly in front of her. Masami held plan after plan, assuring that each push put pressure onto the next.

The threat of using her journal and hairpin had put her on the edge. Having her forfeit the position and admit this to the twins— _to Sou—_ had been to throw her over it.

And it worked.

 _Don't let it._

She couldn't. Taking a deep breath, she thought it through. By doing this idiotic tantrum of hers she'd fallen into Masami's hands. Sulking about this wouldn't make anything better; Sousei was still angry, Suisei was still stuck, and she was digging her pity hole deeper.

 _Don't let it._

Repeating that over for a few seconds, Kohaku took another deep breath, remembering words that always calmed her down. _"Don't let anger control you. Because if you let it, it can hold a leash on you. Much like fear can."_

 _Don't let it._

A last breath got her to sit up and gaze up at the hole she made in the canopy. The faint light of dawn was beginning to hit over the sky, changing the dark blue into an array of red, orange, and purples. Catching a faint sound as she gazed into the sky, Kohaku turned to see Kouen as he stood some feet away.

His eyes wandered over her, surely to the disaster she caused, but didn't question anything. Instead he glanced down at her patiently, or stoically, depending on how she perceived him to be.

"Should I presume you to be leaving?"

It was clear by his blasé tone that he couldn't care less about what she did but the fact that he asked was oddly gratifying. And strangely enough, she didn't want to leave. Shaking her head, she sat there not wanting to get up yet. But before she had a moment to rest from her fit, a blade plunged right beside her into the ground. It scraped along some granite, making a screeching noise that hurt her ears and made her wince before lifting her gaze towards him.

"If you stay, I'll put you to use then."

He walked off, leaving her for a moment as he went off to lay down the rest of the arsenal he'd brought with him. Grabbing the hilt of the sword, she hoisted herself up but stopped briefly when she felt a soothing sensation on her hands and feet. A glint of rosy light caught her eye but it came so fast that she thought she imagined it. Besides her wounds where still there, they might not hurt as bad as before but she still had them.

Lifting the sword out of the ground, she brandished it awkwardly. Blades weren't really her thing. But as he brandished his own and told her what he wanted for a warm-up before they actually started sparring, she found it rather refreshing.

It was different. Her anger gone, dispelled somehow, she focused more on bettering herself. And as she trained alongside him—memories of olden days flashing vaguely at times—she mulled over what to do now. There were issues to be resolved and she needed to think about them to solve them.

Surely, though, she could do it. She would find a way. All she needed to do was think it through.

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _Well, here it is! Another chapter c: I wanted to get this one out before I left for vacations. Ten days of no writing when I want to do so much is gonna be frustrating but I'll deal. Things might be somewhat confusing right now—some events or characters, in particular—but don't worry, I'm going somewhere with it. Just hang on tight and enjoy the ride as it goes._

 _Before I leave I want to say thank you to all the wonderful people that Favorited and Followed:  
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 _And also thanks to the people that reviewed! This is mostly to answer those reviewers that I can't reach via PM or whom I forget to answer to before uploading again :3  
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 _Again thank you all so much for being here when this little bud is barely sprouting. The chapters are long but not consistent so bear with me for a time. Know that I have everything planned out though. This story has a solid begin, middle, and end completely outlined just waiting to be written and read by your guys. That's my ultimate goal: get this out for you guys to enjoy c:_

 _Since I won't be seeing you until probably the new year, I'll be wishing you all a Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and a Happy New Year! Hope to see you all in 2017 again! So for now, hoped you enjoyed my last upload of 2016 and stay tuned for the first update of 2017._


	4. To Err is Human

_**Chapter Four**_

 _To Err is Human_

* * *

 _Tiny legs ran through the large garden of the estate, heavy pants being let in and out as the small child wouldn't stop to rest. Her feet sore from so much running finally urged her to come to a halt; once having stopped, her hands went to her knees as she bent over trying to catch her breath and let her burning lungs cool off. But not even the fresh air of the afternoon could cool down the anger that burned in her. Rested, she picked herself up and brought her tight fists to her eyes, furiously wiping at them wanting to make the tears that began to blur her vision go away._

 _She hated fighting with her sister. No matter what the fight, being the youngest of the two meant that she would always be wrong. No one listened. No one cared to. She sniffed hard and gulped back the lump in her throat before wiping her nose with the sleeve of her dress._

 _"You okay?"_

 _The sudden voice that inquired of her wellbeing made the young girl look up quizzically. Her eyes met similar ones to her own and yet not at the same time. Her jaw dropped at seeing a small figure above, hanging by the branches of the great oak tree, cloaked by shadows as the sunshine blazed from behind them. Before she could try and see anything else, the shadow jumped precariously close to the young girl making her yelp and jump back in surprise. Opening her eyes, the little girl was shocked to find another girl standing before her. Clothes ragged and in disarray, she had small twigs and leaves sticking onto her hair and a silver hairpin slipping from the messy bun she had. Dirt smeared everywhere, including on her fair cheeks. Her eyes wide with wonder stared back at the girl, confused. A frown creased the newcomer's brows as she reached her hands towards the girl without a warning. The younger girl yelped but stopped when the other began roughly wiping at her face. Once done, she pulled back and placed her hands on her hips with a grin on her face._

 _"There, all gone."_

 _The little girl reached her hands up to her cheeks that, although rough from the harsh scrubbing, were dry and tear-free. Unable to find any other words, she murmured while hiding her face behind her sleeves. "T-Thank you."_

 _The newcomer's grin widened and she waved her hands dismissively. "Don't worry 'bout it. I don't like much seeing such a sweet thing crying."_

 _Sweet thing? "Um, why were—I mean, up there, you—"_

 _The girl stared up at the tree she'd jumped off from. "Oh, that." She scratched the back of her head nervously. At catching a twig between her fingers she pulled the silver hairpin out undoing her hair before shaking it to let whatever else hung onto it fall off. Putting the pin between her lips to give her hands room to redo her hair, the little girl saw the flower-shaped end that shone faintly in the sun. The other girl took it in her fingers to put her hair back in place and smiled. "I was taking a birdie up to its nest."_

 _"Nest?"_

 _She nodded and pointed up to one of the branches where the little girl could see the faintest clue of a small nest and heard the chirping of the birds._

 _"It fell. Didn't want it to be away from its family. A kid should be with them at all times, so that they can be safe. At least that's what dad tells me." At that she turned to the girl standing before her in such elegant clothes albeit dirtied at the hem with mud and blades of grass staining them. "Which reminds me, what're you doing here, buttercup?"_

 _"B-B-Butter...?" The little girl pondered at the odd name but shook it out of her head when she remembered why she had run all the way out here. "I…I had a fight with my sister."_

 _"Really? What about?"_

 _She mulled on whether she should be talking to a stranger but the girl didn't seem to mean ill. Besides, she was tired of keeping this to herself. Not being able to contain her resentment anymore, the little girl opened up like a floodgate. "Masami one-sama and father want me to have a vassal but they want to choose for me. I don't want that. I want to know the person that's going to take care of me because..." At the reminder of how her older sister had mocked her idea of what a vassal was, new tears started to sprout from the corner of her eyes. She didn't want just any person that would coldly look after her like they did with her sister. Having grown isolated from other children, what she wanted most of all was someone she could call her friend._

 _"Mmm, I see," the other girl said scratching her chin. "And you don't know the person they've chosen for you, do you?" She shook her head and the other girl nodded, contemplating. "Then you shouldn't be quick to judge them."_

 _"Judge?" the little girl asked._

 _The other nodded vigorously and brightened up with a grin on her face. "For all you know you could end up actually liking this person. Besides, it's not like your sister and dad would choose someone you'd hate. They want what's best for you, like any family does."_

 _The little girl pondered silently over that fact. Despite how angry her sister and father sometimes made her, she never could stay mad at them. She loved them. And she knew that they loved her, too. They would never want anything bad for her. At that thought, she nodded, understanding. "I-I suppose so."_

 _"You suppose right," the other girl said and stretched out her hand before her. "Now let's see about getting you home safe and sound, yeah?"_

 _The little glanced at the outstretched hand before her and back at the girl's grinning face before smiling and grabbing a hold of it. Like promised, the other girl took her back to the estate from where she had run off all the while talking about everything and nothing. Dusk was barely falling when they reached the entrance but not before they heard the ruckus of people that were running around._

 _The two rounded the corner and the little girl caught sight of her sister who stood beside their father as he gave out his orders. "Search everywhere and don't return until she's found!" The little girl backed up scared of what would happen if she showed up now with her father as he was, but a reassuring squeeze of her hand by her companion beside her gave her a little courage and reminded her of what they'd talked about before._

 _They care about her...even if sometimes they don't seem to._

 _Letting go of her clammy hands, the little girl ran towards the two and cried out. "Masami one-sama. Father!" Both turned at hearing the little girl call out to them, relief washing over both their expressions as they ran to her._

 _Masami reacted first, running towards her sister. "Kohaku!" Not caring about her dress, she threw herself down on her knees and checked Kohaku for any injuries and sighed in relief at not finding any on her little sister. "Thank the heavens, you're all right."_

 _"I-I'm sorry, nee-sama!" Kohaku sobbed, tears overflowing as regret and happiness pushed her over the edge. "I'm sorry for running away. And I'm sorry, I didn't mean what I said. I don't hate you or Father. I don't." Masami tried to calm her down but before she could, her father ripped her from her arms and held his daughter close._

 _"Goodness, Kohaku," he breathed against her hair, sounding rather irritated, as she continued to cry, gripping his armor tightly. The frustration and anger from a few hours ago, however, quickly drained from him at having his daughter back. "Don't ever do that again." Kohaku nodded vigorously, trying to hold back her sobs._

 _But she knew now that no matter what she did or how bad she acted, they would always love her. Looking up from her father's shoulder, Kohaku searched for the girl who'd helped her and caught sight of her from afar. She was walking away hand-in-hand with a man that looked like her sister's Masami age, maybe older. The smile the two had as they talked shone just like she'd seen from the girl before._

 _Kohaku rested her cheek against her father's shoulder and through her tears smiled hoping to meet her again and thank her._

* * *

"You're a nuisance as you are now."

Taken aback by the offhanded comment, Kohaku blinked twice before mouthing her confusions at Kouen. He sighed not believing that this woman was the same one that had demolished a tree out of apparent frustration only a few days ago. Several days had passed since he witnessed the little tantrum she'd had. Neither had commented on it but he saw plainly how whatever was on her mind had slowly crippled her physically over the span of those few days.

After she stumbled upon his secluded training grounds, she showed up a couple times more but he hadn't minded it much. Because she couldn't speak, she focused her energy on sparring against him and learned quite quickly how to fend against his advances. He also managed to figure out her own fighting style, though. It was like an odd step-by-step session anytime he fought against her. The more he focused, the more he discovered tiny aspects of her techniques that he hadn't before.

What she lacked in strength, she made up in agility. And for him, who was the exact opposite, it turned out to be a rather good exercise to bout against. But after five days, whatever was wrong was now clearly taking its toll. And he noticed it quite easily that early morning when she wasn't avoiding attacks that she easily managed to before. She missed her attacks when she tried and her blocks were disastrous.

And it was getting irritating really fast.

Kohaku shook her head after the confusion of his off-putting words and went for him instead. He clicked his tongue at the predictable advance before sidestepping it and using the hilt of his sword to stab at her side. It was a move so easy to avoid that even a child could've done it. She, as he had expected, received it head-on, leaping back from the hit before holding onto her side.

He sighed frustrated before sheathing his sword. "That's it. We're done."

" _It's not even dawn yet."_

"I refuse to continue when you're distracted. As you are now, you're doing nothing short of wasting my time."

Kohaku grimaced at his words while rubbing at her side but as she thought about what he said she couldn't help but think that he might be right. Quickly, she ran up to where he was and apologized. He didn't acknowledge any of it. Not wanting to be such a nuisance in her current state, she gathered a few of the weapons and accompanied him to put them away.

As they got closer to the palace and the sun finally rose from its slumber, she couldn't help but glance over to the gardens as they were bathed in golden light. Despite its beauty, she couldn't find any appreciation for it. At least not in her current state of mind and that just made her groan. It'd been four days already since either of the twins had spoken to her; ever since their fight, she tried her best to talk to them but that proved futile very fast. Instead she spent her time thinking on how she could fix it.

Masami hadn't trifled with her ever since then, either, most likely thinking she'd won for the time being. But Kohaku wasn't about to give up. Perhaps the distraction that the prince spoke about had to do with her incessant thinking of her problem. But despite how much she mulled over it, she couldn't think of a clear solution. Nothing came to mind.

Accompanying him to the in the West Wing, she put everything she'd brought with her away without putting much attention to what she was doing. Because of it, she didn't notice how misplaced one of the polearms was, much less how it began to topple over her as she continued putting things in their place. It wasn't until she heard a rattling above her head that she snapped it back up to see a firm hand holding the weapon just below the blade keeping it from hitting her. Turning, she met Kouen's impassive glare and, for once, could see the rising impatience that glinted ever so slightly in his eyes.

She grinned sheepishly wishing to simply brush the incident aside as a mishap. But he didn't seem to fall for the ruse. "Don't dare show your face at the training grounds until you've fixed whatever this is."

A chill ran down her spine at hearing the distinct annoyance in his voice. As good as she was at reading people, she began to notice that Kouen's expressions, or clear lack thereof, belied his mood but it became more than clear to anyone who listened closely enough to the tone of his voice. The past few days she'd woken up early to join him because training against him actually cleared her mind and exhausted her body. It helped her think better when under pressure but perhaps this problem was something that needed some quiet thinking.

She sighed and apologized before nodding. Excusing herself, she hated that she was actually having to make up excuses for her state of mind. She disliked apologizing. But the only way to clear up her mind completely would be to think things through with a fine-tooth comb. As she bathed, she let her mind wonder over what she'd done to try and fix the mess she'd gotten into.

So far, Sousei refused to speak to her. Even when they would stumble upon each other, he would avert his eyes and walk away. Not even when she explicitly went out of her way to talk to him in his room did he stay put. He would make up some excuse then leave. As always Suisei suffered in the sidelines, stuck as to whom to support. Kohaku assured her that she needn't force herself; this wasn't something that could tear them apart so easily.

 _At least I hope it isn't._

Sinking herself further into the tub filled with hot water, she pondered further about that. Sousei was smart and faithful to a reserved few which included his family. It wasn't like they weren't accustomed to the casual sibling dispute from time to time. Most had been petty but there were exceptions, the issues where Sou's future was concerned would be the biggest one.

Much like Suisei, Sousei wished nothing but a free life for himself. Despite being the son of a general he wanted to help others more than to lead. If he had to fight, he wouldn't shy away from it like she often did. He was strong-willed and determined to do what was right for those he loved and his country. But he also possessed a kind, understanding heart; he knew that what was right wasn't always the best for everyone. It was in their compassion that she and Sou found their most common ground. It was that same compassion that she knew would make a great general of him.

But he didn't want that position. He didn't want to disappoint them, more so their father. In their father's eyes, Sousei's determination had always been what would bring him glory but also considered compassion a weakness. Much like how he despised the compassion and pacific tendencies she had, she was sure he wouldn't see kindly to Sousei's own. And surely, over the years, she'd been aware of Sou's ever observant eye. He knew their father as much as they did; he certainly knew how he'd react if he knew that Sou, his only son, would much rather hand over the position of their family to one of his sisters than hold it himself.

He didn't want to be chained by responsibilities. He didn't want to be faced with choices he feared he wouldn't be able to make one day.

Kohaku knew this from the numerous talks they've had. Shortly after her third dungeon, he'd expressed how much more suited she was for the role of next head of the Reizei Household. He'd equated power to entitlement, and in their day and age, he wouldn't be too far off the mark to think that way. But he also greatly underestimated himself while severely overestimating her.

 _I'm not as strong as you make me out to be, Sou._

Hakucho had been a clear example of that. She wasn't perfect. Nobody was. She was as human as they were; just as prone to err as he was.

Kohaku took a deep breath before submerging her whole head underneath the water letting the pressure in her lungs steady as she held her breath. If only he'd listen, she could tell him exactly what she wanted to say. But that required for him to actually speak to her. Seeing things as they currently were that would take a huge miracle, though.

A sudden thought made her raise her head through the surface and take small breaths. Her eyes wide and mind working fast, she quickly ran the idea through her head with a small smile forming on her lips the more she thought about it. She sprang out of the bath as fast as she could and began to ready herself for the day knowing that if all went as she planned, it'd be a long one.

All she needed was to create a moment to allow herself time to talk to Sousei. She needed to draw him out. And she knew exactly the person to make that happen.

* * *

Suisei sat still against the wall of her brother's room. Unable or unwilling to do much of anything, she sat watching over her young twin as he went about his room doing mindless tasks. She watched him do a lot of everything but at the same time when she looked at him, it was easy for her to see how stressed out he was. What she couldn't grasp was whether it stemmed from his future duties knocking at the door again or from Kohaku not accepting the position offered to her.

Tired of seeing him and wanting some answers after five days of mindless work, Suisei stretched her legs in front of her and leaned fully against the wall to look up at Sousei as he walked back and forth in front of her. "Sou?" He didn't answer and kept shifting from place to place. "Sousei?" No answer still. Just mindless walking.

She blew her hair out of her face from the frustration. If he wasn't going to listen to her normally, then maybe something else would help. **"Souchi?"**

At hearing this, Sousei actually stopped and turned to face her, his brow furrowing in confusion. She hadn't expected any less. They hadn't spoken to each other with their 'secret words' since they were toddlers. Their own special little language, they left it behind with their childhood but used it still in rare occasions where they needed each other's company.

" **Why are you speaking this now?"** he asked confused.

" **You won't listen otherwise, apparently,"** she replied with a shrug of her shoulders.

His brow furrowed deeper from his frown. "You didn't call me."

"I did," she assured and stood up to meet him. Despite being the same age, it still amused her how much they differed from one another now, height being one of the more obvious factors. But one thing that didn't change was how they could still sense each other's distress. "Now, call me stupid if I'm wrong but you're not this uptight and stressed from the idea of being dad's replacement, are you?" Sousei averted his gaze and reached up to rub at his neck. "It's Haku-nee…isn't it?"

"She's an idiot."

There it is. Suisei pursed her lips at finally hearing what he'd been keeping pent up for five days. "At times."

"She's a bigger idiot for declining the offer." Sousei grunted and threw his hands up in the air out of frustration. "Why the hell would she ever do that? Hasn't she always wanted to prove to father that she's capable of commanding as much as I or he is?"

"She's capable, all right," Suisei agreed with a smile. "But you know that's not how our world works. Merit gets trampled by lineage, hands down."

Suisei flinched when Sousei brought his fist against the wall behind him. His frown had twisted into a scowl at hearing this. "That shouldn't be. No matter the name or blood, talent shouldn't be trampled on like that."

His choice of words confused her a bit but her thoughts were derailed when a knock came to their door. When she saw Sousei going back to her mindless walking, she went ahead to answer the door. She was amazed to find Kougyoku on the other side accompanied by Ka Koubun.

"Good morning, Suisei," she called sweetly.

"Princess." Suisei bowed but Kougyoku waved that away and smiled at her.

"May I come in?"

Seeing nothing wrong in that, she let both of them into the parlor and was heading to the room to fetch Sousei when he walked out. He eyed the two confused before voicing his question. "Princess Kougyoku, why are you here?"

"Can I not visit my friends?" she asked with puffed cheeks. Seeing the sit before a table available, she took it while accommodating her garments as she sat.

"Friends?" Sui repeated, coming closer to her. Sousei stayed a few feet back, refraining from going anywhere near the table.

"Yes," Kougyoku said with a shaky clap of her hands. From the corner of his eyes, Sousei noticed the gesture and that brought his attention to the clothes she was wearing.

"Princess, if it's not too imprudent, why are you wearing those clothes?" he asked while pointing down at them. Simple and bland except a few light pink colors, her clothes could very well be described as common. Certainly far from what a princess should be wearing.

Kougyoku gave them a brief glance before smiling. "It actually has to do with why I came here. I'm downtrodden as of late and wish to go out into the city for a change."

"Why dress like that though?" Suisei asked still confused.

"It's easier to blend in," she assured touching the skirts of her dress. "Much easier to move in too, I might add. I've been overwhelmed as of late and wish to go out with my dear friends. Is that too much to ask?"

The twins gave each other a look that added to their own disbelief. But when Sousei turned back to glance down at Kougyoku, he couldn't look away from the puppy-eyed look she was giving him. A slight pout that made her magenta eyes sparkle all the more. He tried to look away—he really did—but those eyes…there was just no saying no to that.

"I-If you're highness insists," Sousei replied in a mumble.

Suisei's jaw dropped a bit not believing the quick change in personality that her brother just had. Then again, as Kougyoku celebrated beside her, she could understand where it came from too.

"That's fantastic!" the princess exclaimed while motioning for Ka Koubun to bring some other clothes. "Luckily, I'm prepared with some change of clothes for you as well." Hurriedly, he went and came back passing the clothes to each of them respectively.

Looking at her bright teal and gray outfit that was nothing more than a tunic and pants, Suisei chuckled. "I like it."

"Glad you do."

"Is this really necessary?" Sousei asked, glancing at his own set that showed a combination of light and darker blues. Seeing how the colors themselves stuck out so much from the usual ones in town, he highly doubted they'd blend as much as she hoped to.

"Of course!" she called out enthusiastic. "It's what makes it much more fun. Like this we can just let go and relax."

Suisei laughed and agreed. Sousei couldn't help but give her a small smile and nod as well. Despite his foul mood and all he'd have pent up as of late, there was no denying that Kougyoku was a ray of sunshine that brightened even the dampest of moods. So they acceded to her request and changed, each taking a turn to use his room to do so. Once done, Kougyoku dismissed Ka Koubun, knowing that as long as they stayed together that they would be all right. Besides, it wasn't like she wasn't a Metal Vessel user and the two weren't Household Members themselves.

Kougyoku explained that they needed to sneak out through the East Wing where they were situated in order to catch less attention. It was an easy task, especially when Sousei made sure no one was around by heightening his hearing. Once out and near the outskirts of the city, he took in a deep breath and made himself relax. After being so riled up the past few days, perhaps this might actually turn out relaxing like Kougyoku had said.

"We'll start at the market place and make our way around," Kougyoku explained to them as she hooked an arm around Suisei's. She tried to do the same with Sousei but he stepped away, pink dusting his cheeks. Not noticing this, Kougyoku guided them to the first shop and stopped. Sou noticed her smile broaden as she raised her free arm in the air to wave out into the crowd.

Both twins turned and their expressions varied—from shock to relief—as they watched from afar as Kohaku joined them. Dressed as simply as they were, she left aside her usual elegant garments for a simpler dress of sky blue and white. Some of her hair was held back in a small bun at the nape of her neck with her feather pen attached while the rest laid over her shoulders or behind her back. The glint of her bracelet was also visible as she raised her hand to brush a strand of stray hair behind her ear.

Sousei's ire from before quickly rose and he turned about without a second thought. Before he could even leave, though, two separate hands caught him and stopped him in his tracks. Suisei grabbed his left forearm and Kougyoku his right hand. Incapacitated by both, he cursed himself for not having seen through the obvious ruse.

"I can't believe I fell for this," he mumbled under his breath.

"We just want to spend some time together, Sousei," Kougyoku offered. "Is that really so bad?"

"Come on, Sou," Suisei said while pulling at him. "Sulking around won't do you any good."

"I'd rather sulk than see her right—" but his words got cut short at glancing down and seeing Kougyoku's frowning face. Her cheeks puffed slightly in anger and her eyes in a bit of a glare, she pulled his arm closer and walked him herself towards Kohaku's direction. Sousei couldn't find it in him to complain, especially when he was enjoying himself a bit with it. Suisei grinned and skipped, following them to Kohaku's side.

At reaching their sister, though, a slight frown came to him. Kohaku smiled welcomingly at him and he had to try hard to keep a straight face. "Know that I'm coming here under duress."

" _Do you really hate spending time together like this?"_

"With you right now? Don't count me in as the happiest guy in the world."

Both Kougyoku and Suisei flinched at such straight forward answer but Kohaku didn't seem fazed although they could see a tinge of sadness in her eyes. She kept her smile and answered him. _"I know you're cross at me but just for today give me a chance. I'll explain. Before I do, though, enjoy yourself a little. We've been under too much stress as of late. Let's just enjoy each other's company for a while, shall we?"_

The two remained quiet as Sousei mulled over his answer. It took a few seconds before they heard him sigh and glance up nonchalantly from the ground. "Today. That's all you get so it better be good. I'd rather enjoy my time with Kougyoku and Sui, so you'd better think well about what you're going to say."

Stepping out of Suisei's grasp, he pulled Kougyoku and entered the first store that he saw. Suisei chuckled before turning to Kohaku who was smiling as well.

"I thought Kougyoku's sudden visit seemed sketchy," she said as they followed behind them.

" _If anybody was going to draw him out, it'd be her,"_ Kohaku replied with a grin.

She giggled at this but a sullen expression came to her before she glanced back at Kohaku. "You're really not taking that position?"

Kohaku didn't reply to that. Instead she answered with something else. _"I want to have him understand that I don't intend to leave him out to dry. I never did. I'll always support you two in whatever decision you make. I just want to remind him of that."_

It wasn't what Suisei wanted to hear but it somehow calmed her down to hear it. "All right, we'll hear you out then." And if it solved the quarrel between his brother and sister then all the better. She was tired of being stuck in the middle.

* * *

 _So far, so good._

Sort of.

Her little plan of drawing Sousei out of his cocoon by using Kougyoku had worked like she planned it. Although she felt a tiny bit guilty about using his crush for the young princess against him, it was with the best of intentions in mind. Besides, by the looks of it he didn't seem to mind being dragged around by Kougyoku and Suisei as they shopped.

And although she enjoyed watching them get along together as normal children, Kohaku had brought them here specifically to talk. It wasn't helping that she kept dragging the conversation off before it even started. But she needed to make damn sure that what she said would be the right thing. Having Masami hate her was something she could live with, and she did. But having either of the twins hate her… The thought alone made her heart want to sink.

 _I've got to fix this._

Watching them from a few feet away and speaking only when spoken to, she found the day passing them by quite fast. And as they stumbled through the crowded streets looking for a place to eat, she couldn't stop thinking that the day Sousei gave her was quickly running out. If she didn't talk to him soon, goodness knew when else she would get such an opportunity to make amends.

 _It's now or never._

She took a deep breath and lifted her gaze to watch the three of them a few paces away, busying themselves with finding a place where they could eat. Determined to make it or break it, she took a single step forward to them but bumped against another passerby. She was about to bow in apology but the man—at least what she assumed to be one—barely even glanced at her before continuing on his way. The slight glance, though, gave her a sinking feeling. The worst part was that she didn't know why.

His face…where had she seen it before?

"Anegimi!" Kohaku spun on her heel almost bumping into more people as she trotted over to Kougyoku who'd called her over.

"Don't get lost, Haku-nee," Sui said with a grin.

" _I'll try not to."_ It'd be hard, she'd admit that much. With so many people crowded in one place, it rattled the noise together that much tighter. The reverberations that her sensitive ears were getting had started giving her a mild headache as it was. Shoving that ache aside, she listened to Kougyoku as she told the whole group that she and Suisei would go get the food while Sousei and Kohaku would find a place to sit.

Agreeing to those terms—Sousei somewhat reluctantly—the group separated. Kohaku busied herself watching out for any place to sit. Luckily an old couple had just stood from their sit just under the shade. A smile at having found such a good spot, she attempted to grab Sousei's sleeve but when she reached out, he brought his arm back against his side.

Lifting her gaze, she met his—stark blue staring right at a darker shade. He must've seen the same table, apparently; not giving her any remark, he strode over to the table and took a sit, making sure that he'd be facing away from the any of the others. Distraught but not defeated, Kohaku walked up and took the nearest sit to him.

Silence ensued. Despite her previous determination to resolve the problem, she found doubt in herself. Her eyes shifted around, watching the people that passed them by. The few glances she gave his way didn't show him in anyway as troubled as she felt. That worried her somewhat.

Maybe talking through things wouldn't help either.

 _No, they will._

Sousei wasn't irrational. He seldom let his emotions get in the way of what he knew was right.

 _And that will be the death of me one day._

Not today, though. Today she could make this work. She would.

Inching her hand across the table, Kohaku reached to Sousei's sleeve and tugged it. His attention piqued, he turned his head to glance back over his shoulder. Her breathed hitched at seeing the iciness that lined those dark eyes of his. She felt cold—frostbitten in a way that she rarely saw in either of her little siblings, much less directed at her. They quarreled like all families did—Masami being the exception— but never this intensely. And she wanted it over with.

Taking a deep breath for encouragement, she raised her shaking hands. _"I know that…apologizing won't do any good."_ Sousei scoffed and averted his gaze down onto the table. Not deterred, she placed her hands down on the wooden surface and continued to sign. _"But I want to talk. Will you listen?"_

From underneath his lashes, she could see the small movement of his eyes as they followed her fingers. Without a word, he leaned his chin on his palm before glancing down directly at her hands. _"I know…you don't like what I've decided. I don't either."_

"Then why?"

Hearing his words tore her; the way he said them, that he didn't even raise his voice, and the fact that his were the only ones she could hear among the ruckus of the afternoon crowd. _"Some things need to be a certain way, Sou. As much as I'm honored being offered such position, you know I can't take it."_

"Is it…because of Masami?"

At hearing that name, she couldn't help but frown in confusion. _"Why would you—"_

Placing a hand over hers as she signed, Sousei stopped her. "Suisei mentioned that the two of you don't seem to be in the best of terms. The more I thought about it, the more it started making sense. And it's been that way ever since you captured Marbas, hasn't it?"

Kohaku didn't affirm nor deny the accusation. Beleth had been the first djinn she'd captured and the four of them had been present in that dungeon. Out of them and the guards sent with them, the djinn had chosen her: a lamb among predators. Kohaku could only guess that it stung Masami that she hadn't been chosen being the oldest. Marbas had been Masami's second attempt at gaining a dungeon's power. But it failed as well. Despite it only being the two of them present—disregarding the Magi of the organization who'd been there as a guide— Marbas had chosen her. Two failed attempts and a major reproach by their father later, the friction was more than tangible. It only took one other thing— _the only thing that mattered_ — to throw Masami's emotions over the brink and into their current state.

So, in a way, he wasn't too far off.

" _Yes. We talked it over when she received the letter. If we wished for our family to continue prospering in the empire, regardless of who deserves it, you must be the one to take over."_

"What'll the point be of me taking over as weak as I am now?" At hearing this, it was her turn to grab at his hand. She squeezed it tight and with a shake of her head assured him otherwise. He scoffed, this time with a wry smile on his lips. "You say that because you have to. You're my sister."

" _I'm more than just your sister, Sousei. I'm your friend. I'm your rock to lean on just as much as you and Suisei are mine. And even with you as general and head of household that won't change."_

Sousei pondered over the words he read, his hand brushing through his hair over and over. Lips pursed, he shook his head. "You're better at being general, though. Better than Sui, better than Masami, and definitely better than me."

" _But I'm human, too; I err. We've both seen that."_

"And I don't?"

Kohaku rubbed at his hands soothingly with one hand and continued signing with the other. _"You do. But you won't be alone at doing this like I told you. Sui will be with you. Masami will be with you. I'll be with you. We won't let you face this alone."_

"It'd be no different regardless of who took the position," he mumbled under his breath. "They'd do the same for either of us."

 _One wouldn't._

She pursed her lips at the mere thought and how much it saddened her. Shaking it off, she continued wanting to hammer down the point of her sermon. _"Maybe so, but the facts of our lives still stand. I hold no power nor status as a member of our family. Neither Masami, Suisei, nor myself will ever amount to much other than being decorations for whatever future household we're married to. I may wear Metal Vessels, and Suisei may carry a Household Vessel, but the one simple fact remains: we're women. Only you can carry on our family name."_

"Then why send the letter in the first place?"

" _Father's sick. Perhaps the feebleness has rotten his judgement. Perhaps the decision is only temporary until he recovers. At the end of the day, we both know him and he would never willingly abdicate his position to me."_

Sousei sighed and rubbed at the back of his neck. Kohaku stopped for a second to allow him some space to think. She knew him to be smart and that he could easily understand all that she told him, regardless of how harsh it was.

After a few seconds of silence, he finally replied in a soft whisper, "…it's not fair."

 _Seldom anything is._

" _But we can get through this together, Sou, like we've always done."_ Rubbing her thumb on the back of his hand as she held it, Kohaku offered him a small, encouraging smile. _"You can lead and we'll be with you every step of the way."_

At seeing this, he frowned before slumping forward and hiding his face against his forearm as he laid it on the table. Their hands still held together, she waited patiently for him to say something. At last, after what seemed to be an eternity, he muttered what truly, in her opinion, tormented his mind.

"…I'm scared."

Who wouldn't be. Despite having been in many battles over the last few years, she shook at times seeing death and despair covering what had been prosperous lands. The worst had been when she herself was forced to cause it. Sousei and Suisei were no different. They'd each experience their share of torment at having to cause pain and suffering to others. And although they understood it to be for the good of their empire and people, she also knew the grave sin of stealing life before its time.

She felt remorse for killing. She felt anguish over those who died. But most of all, she felt fear for her own small, replaceable life.

Burying her hand underneath his palm, she signed slowly against it so that he would be able to understand the movements. _"Me too, Sou. My biggest fear is the mere thought of anything horrible happening to you or Suisei. But we can't let this fear dwell and nest in us. If you let that fear have you, you'll have fear as a master. It'll tie you down. And if it does, you will truly lose all freedom."_

That alone made him lift his gaze. Seeing his eyes, glazed as they were with unshed tears, tore at her. He sniffed and grabbed the hand she'd been signing with tightly in his grasp and brought up to his lips. "Is that what you're giving up so much to protect? My freedom?"

" _No."_ He blinked a couple of times, perplexed. _"What I'm protecting and always will is the two of you. You and Suisei are my everything. I would never do anything to deliberately put you in harm's way and I would die before I ever let anything happen to either of you. So believe me, compared to you, forfeiting father's position as general is nothing."_

He chortled at this and tried to casually wipe at the tears that had been gathering on his eyes. "Only you would say something so ludicrous."

That he'd manage to at least smile after the past few days of tension brought one to her as well. _"Would my feeding the riches of the seven seas to pigs have been more believable?"_ She shrugged her shoulders at that with a grin on her lips. _"Regardless of the phrasing, the truth of the matter remains. The things that I do, I do them out of love."_

"Consequences be damned, huh?" he asked, eloquently.

" _As long as they only befall me."_

Smiling wryly, Sousei shook his head before bringing their clasps hands closer to his lips. Giving them a chaste kiss, he pressed their knuckles against his forehead, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. "Things don't need to be so black and white, Haku-nee. I'm sure…something can be done where we're all given our just reward."

" _Karma works that way, yes."_

"She's a slow bitch, though," he added with a cheeky grin. "So I'll do my best to search every nook and cranny for an answer. You've done enough if you're driven to forfeit. So leave it to me."

" _And if we're only left back here at square one?"_

"Then…" He stopped briefly to contemplate his answer. "I won't coward away. I'll take responsibility if it comes down to it. Fear won't rein me in; I won't let it."

" _And we'll be there with you to see you through."_

He smiled at that and nodded. "Thank you, **Hakuchi**."

Kohaku's eyes widened at hearing that. It'd been years since she'd heard the twins' little secret language. Being phonetically based, someone like her with such overdeveloped hearing could easily catch the quirks of the sounds. And the endearment that they would mostly use for one another had never been used for anybody else. At least none that she heard.

That mere fact made her smile widen and left her speechless. At recognizing two distinctly high-pitched voices, she turned to see Kougyoku and Suisei coming their way with food in hand. The slight squeeze of her hand made her turn back to Sousei who smiled back at her before whispering under his breath so no one else would hear, "And sorry…for how I've been up till now."

She held him tightly in response before patting the back of his hand, reassuringly.

 _We all err._

* * *

Kohaku found it almost miraculous that one single conversation was all it took to make amends with her brother. He still was somewhat shaky about what would happen in the future but for the time being all was well. As Kougyoku had originally planned when she'd brought the idea to her, the four of them spent the day enjoying themselves. Everything—from studies to meetings—got left behind, forgotten. Regrettably, the day had gone by faster than they had anticipated. Although she knew that some of Rakushou's liveliness occurred at night, she already knew how tiresome the whole day had been for them. Despite the anxieties that were left behind, a rest for the mental and physical exhaustion their fight brought onto them was sorely needed.

She told them this just as the sun began to set turning what had been a bright blue sky now into a hue of dark indigo, reds, and orange. As she expected, Suisei and Kougyoku pouted in reproach while Sousei frowned in disappointment.

"There's still a good half an hour of daylight left," Sousei told her. "Can't we just leave at nightfall?"

" _We have Kougyoku with us,"_ she reminded them. _"They'll worry about her the longer we take."_ At signing this, she turned to the princess with a half grin. _"You wouldn't want your brothers to worry, now, would you?"_

Her pout vanished then. "No, I wouldn't."

Kohaku smiled and patted Kougyoku's head. _"We can come some other time, Kougyoku. Think of this as one day out of the many to come."_

That seemed to pacify her enough to agree to her request to return. They had traveled quite a way from the palace and although not as crowded as it had been in the morning, the streets still held plenty of people that hurried to finish their errands for the night. Kougyoku led the way back while holding either arm of each twin. Kohaku decided best to stay a few paces behind.

"Ah, but I really wanted some!" Suisei's sudden outburst rings through Kohaku's ears rather painfully. Stopping the whole group, she watched as Sui threw a small tantrum wanting to go buy something before they left.

Raising an eyebrow at them, she watched as Sousei gave in to his sister as he always did. "Fine, we can go back for it."

"But isn't it getting late already?" Kougyoku asked.

"It is." Sousei thought over that as well but it got hard to with Suisei pestering him about wanting that desert she'd missed on their way back.

" _I'll get her back safely."_

"Are you sure?" he asked.

Kohaku nodded and stood behind Kougyoku with her hands on her shoulders. The princess glanced up over her shoulder to meet those stark blue eyes before smiling and turning to Sousei. "If it's anegimi, then I'm sure we'll be fine. Besides, I've got Vinea, as well." The hair ornament glinted in the faint gaslight of the stalls that were still open around them as if in agreement.

Sousei sighed with a defeated grin. "I suppose you're right. We'll hurry there so that we can catch up to you two."

With that decided, the four split up: two backtracking while the other two went on their way back home.

"You and Sousei must have made-up," Kougyoku commented sheepishly, her cheeks a bit dusted at the straight forward question.

Taking it to stride, Kohaku wasn't bothered to answer. _"We talked. Air got cleared and we're back to, well, us."_

"That's wonderful." Kohaku watched from the corner of her eye the quiet demeanor that Kougyoku suddenly turned to, shy with her hands wringing her fingers.

" _Is something the matter, princess?"_

Kougyoku wanted to smile but it only became a sad attempt at one. Instead, the concern was etched more noticeably on her face. Not wanting for her mood to be dampen so soon after their joyful excursion, Kohaku waiting patiently for Kougyoku to talk.

Kougyoku brushed a strand of red hair behind her ear, her gaze shifting before her and the road in front of her, before she actually started speaking. "It's just that...today was enjoyable. I don't recall the last time I've actually spend such time like this."

" _Have you been that busy?"_

The question itself made her shake her head. "Quite the opposite, actually. It seems I have _too_ much time in my hands. Tragic, really, considering my ambitions." The moment that last sentence came out of her mouth, she brought her hands up to her lips. She chuckled nervously before dropping her hands from her face. "Forget what I said."

The pace of her walking slowed at this hesitance. Kohaku watched, pained, as the girl before her shrunk to what she used to be: a shy mouse, too afraid or embarrassed to voice her thoughts. Not wanting her to sink in such hole again, Kohaku grabbed her by the wrist and brought her away from the crowd. Underneath a small roof of a nearby stall, she brought her to rest there as the two stood leaning against the wall of the building.

Kougyoku stared up in confusion but was calmed when Kohaku smiled. Releasing the grip on her wrist, she placed one hand atop Kougyoku's conjoined pair, stopping her from wringing her hands red. With the other, she asked, _"What kind of ambitions, Kougyoku?"_

The princess gazed at the hand that kept hers immobile before lifting her head to gaze back Kohaku. Unsure but unable to remain quiet any longer, Kougyoku spoke with the liberty given. "I wish to be like you, anegimi."

" _Like me?"_

"…a general."

Kohaku's eyes widened at that declaration. Her, a princess of Kou, pining for such a position baffled her to say the least. Being general could be a glorious status but that was only out of the battlefield. In it, things changed drastically. And by a simple glance, something told her that Kougyoku would have a much harder time adapting to that harsher reality of what her position stood for. Even as a fellow Metal Vessel user, Kougyoku seemed more the type to fight to save rather than destroy. It was completely different to the Western Subjugation Army's primary goal.

But she didn't have time to question anything before Kougyoku began to jumble everything together in her attempt at an explanation. "I-It's not like I'm doing this on a whim. I understand what a position like yours and Kouha's means; to fight for the sake of and serve our country is something that I've always admired my brothers for. You, as well. Being general would mean that I'd actually be serving a purpose for my people. I—" With shaking hands, she reached up to touch the hair ornament that gleamed lightly at her timid touch. "I'm a Metal Vessel user and I gained this power out of my own will. Both Kouen onii-sama and Judar-chan, they saw something in me that I've always been too afraid to look for. They saw strength and they saw me as the warrior I wish to be."

Bringing her gaze up to meet hers, Kohaku stared at the pair of pink eyes that gazed so intently into her. Although never said directly, that strength that the other two apparently saw she'd seen it too. From the short month after their reunion, she'd seen the blatant change in Kougyoku. It wasn't just that her shyness had considerably decreased, either. No, the change she felt had much more to do with what Kougyoku could be capable of; despite the kind soul she was, Kohaku didn't doubt the young girl before her was a force to be reckoned with. Perhaps she was being biased or too easily swayed by the words of a friend she thought too dearly of, but it was the feeling she got about it.

And her gut feelings were rarely wrong.

" _Then if that's what you're aiming for, how about I help as well?"_

Kougyoku's eyes snapped wide open at this and she blinked owlishly back at Kohaku who only grinned. "W-What did you say…?"

" _Let me help you achieve that goal, Kougyoku. As a friend, I wish for nothing more than to see you succeed."_

The confusion washed off completely replaced by the joy that burst through Kougyoku. Unable to keep herself still, she jumped at Kohaku and hugged her tightly, thanking her in whispers that, unknown to her, she could hear well enough. Kohaku patted her head soothingly in response.

Wilting such young seeds was the last thing she wanted to do. Where there's a will, there's a way; Kougyoku, Sousei, and Suisei had their individual goals and so long as she held breath in her body, she'd work towards accomplishing those goals with them.

Pulling her to arm's length, she promised to talk later about this to settle on something to help her. For now, they needed to get back home. Kougyoku agreed and they headed off again to the palace. But unlike before, Kohaku felt uneasy. And the pricking sensation that ran down her back wasn't helping. As they walked, her eyes wandered sideways, sometimes nonchalantly over her shoulder. She clicked her tongue at noticing something after a few minutes of watching.

 _Maybe I'm overreacting._

"Anegimi?" Kohaku raised a finger for Kougyoku to keep quiet, taking attention away from her suddenly taking Kougyoku's hand in her own.

" _Humor me, please."_

The princess nodded with clear confusion etched on her expression. Taking the lead, Kohaku picked up their step a little and began turning corners. She picked up and turned at random on whichever corner she could see before slowing down to check behind her. Doing this a couple more times verified what she'd feared.

Two…three…four. She counted five men. All of them had followed either closely or a few steps behind them, turning at every corner, hurrying when they did, or slowing to a crawl when they did.

 _We're being followed._

Some thugs must've noticed them. Whether because of their attire or because of the jewelry they wore didn't really matter. What mattered at the moment was to get away from them and get Kougyoku back to the palace. Confronting them would cause a scene and besides it wasn't like she could very well argue with anybody. But losing them was proving to be a futile attempt the more turns and twists she gave. But she was so concentrated on losing them that Kougyoku had to stop her from running into the dead end she'd inadvertently locked themselves into.

Eyeing for any other possible exit, she ignored Kougyoku's worry, "Anegimi, what's going on?"

By the time she had processed what she'd said, the thugs that had followed behind them cut off their only exit. It's was only two of them now. Dressed in odd attire and sheathing even stranger weapons, it took Kohaku a second to recall from that afternoon someone else whom she'd seen in similar garbs: the man who she bumped into.

One of the men smirked at seeing the two as he walked to the right blocking the exit more broadly. "General, what a coincidence to see you here. Truly made our job much easier."

"And look," the other scoffed, his grin splitting his face. "Seems like we caught a little Kou princess in our net as well."

General…they recognized her even as she was now. What's worse they recognized Kougyoku. And by how they were prowling towards them, this didn't seem like the friendly neighborhood conversation she had prayed it'd be.

Kougyoku stood away from behind her to stand beside Kohaku. Shoulders squared, all semblance of relaxation was gone as Kougyoku regained her posture as the princess she was. "If you know so well who we are, then what nerve do you have to threaten us?"

"Oh, our apologies, princess," the first one replied with a smug grin. "But if you thought that was a threat, you're sorely mistaken. This—" from beneath their clothes, they drew weapons that Kohaku had failed to see. Ones that were all too familiar, "—is a threat."

 _Magic weapons._

They're mercenaries.

"But you're not who we're after, princess." The two flanked either of them, the hilts of magic swords Kohaku knew could sprout raging flames or lightning pointed their way. "General Reizei, if you would be so kind to step forth."

She quickly signed to Kougyoku who translated the few words. "Who are you?"

"How unfortunate that you don't remember us, General." As she had guessed, the man who'd spoken activated his weapon letting it spew flames and form a blade of fire. "Especially when you we came here to deliver the same sentence you delivered to our people in Hakucho!"

The first attacked them, the hilt he'd been holding spouted out a ray of lightning that whistled and crackled like a whip. Acting on instinct, Kohaku drew out Beleth and dispelled the attacks that came simultaneously from both magic weapons. Having summoned her sound staff, she whipped it sideways creating a sound wave that shoved them back.

She grabbed Kougyoku and dragged her out, running as fast as the two could towards the palace. The moment she ran out of the alleyway, though, she was bombarded by a cacophony of screams. The people around them were yelling and pointing in the direction of where they'd just exited. More crackling and whistling came and with a mere glance back she saw the nearby rooftops come ablaze. The flames traveled quickly with the evening breeze that had begun to blow setting the neighboring places on fire.

Unable to look away, the two of them stood watching from afar as the people scrambled in fear. Most ran away but some stormed forth to help put the fires out. Their efforts were useless, though, for the two men kept driving them back with their weapons and setting even more houses ablaze.

"Come, General!" they shouted over the ruckus made by the scurrying people. "We've got something to give to you that's long overdue."

" **Vinea!"** Kohaku turned at hearing Kougyoku call forth her djinn with a powerful bellow. Seeing the hair ornament glow in her hands, she caught the glimpse of the water that she controlled from the nearby sources as it rained down on the burning buildings. She brought her hand down, glaring at the bastards that started this. "You will not terrorize our people, you fiends."

"Pretty trick. Dungeon capturers sure have it easy. Too bad you can't be everywhere at once." Before either of them could decipher what he meant by that, several explosions thundered scattered throughout the city. Angered by their attack, she assaulted them with a sonic wave. But, as she had expected, they cut it away with the magic their weapons bore. "It's only fair, isn't it, General? After what you did to Hakucho and our people—eye for an eye sounds just mighty fine."

Before she could attack them again, the two attacked. Not wanting to avoid it and leave Kougyoku to take it, Kohaku pressed the vibrations in the air in a single place. Instead of traveling they remained and formed a firm wall of sound. The attacked bounced off as did some of the power that rebounded back towards her. Thankfully, it'd been a harmless hit but the two had run away.

Kohaku took a step forth intending on pursuing after them and whatever other cohorts they had with them but thought better of it.

 _Kougyoku._

She couldn't leave her.

"We have to go after them!" Kougyoku exclaimed, summoning her djinn weapon equip to more easily control the limited water she had around her.

" _You can't."_

"What?"

" _I need to get you back safely to the palace first."_

"But the people—"

 _I know…_

Knowing she couldn't do this alone, she took her staff close to the bottom before bringing it overhead and slamming it down onto the ground, letting it bounce back up. The rings shook against each other and the sound reverberated loudly, traveling as far as the air took it. Grabbing Kougyoku by the hand, she dragged her along as they ran through the blaring crowd. They hadn't even gotten a few feet away when she heard their voices.

"Haku-nee!" From afar, she saw both Sousei and Suisei running their way. They've heard her call after all. Meeting them halfway, she shoved Kougyoku at Sousei unceremoniously.

He caught her no problem, having to shift the hold he had on his sword before doing so. All three turned up to her for answers but there was no time for that.

" _Take her back to the palace then come back with help to put out the fires."_

"What about the ones responsible?" Kougyoku shouted, trying to get out of Sousei's grasp.

" _They're mine."_

Sousei took a second to look at Kohaku in the eye. Stark blue met dark cobalt and in them he didn't see their sister anymore, only their General.

" _You've been given your orders. Now go!"_

The twins nodded undeterred by the forcefulness of her signs. Kougyoku glanced back worried but couldn't keep them from taking her. They ran against the current of people that headed towards their burning homes and shops, working hard to put out the fires that racked havoc on them.

"This isn't right!" Kougyoku shouted, somewhat starting to run out of breath. "We should be staying and helping to catch those men!"

"We were given our orders," Suisei told her, shoving to make way for herself as she ran.

Sousei gritted his teeth but answered her as well, "Our priority is to take you to safety."

"But Kohaku-ane—"

"I know, Kougyoku." Kougyoku glanced up, surprised at how calm Sousei was. "But Kohaku gave us orders. And as her captains, we must follow."

"She will be all right," Suisei added, glancing back at the fire that spread explosions going farther away into the city. "What matters now is your safety."

"And once at the palace, you'll need to direct the help to stop the damages from spreading," Sousei told her. "It's the other reason she wants you there. To you, they'll listen, and there, you'll be safe."

Kougyoku pursed her lips in disgust. The closer they got to the security of her home, the further the havoc that ravaged through the city spread. And Kohaku was alone to confront the criminals responsible.

 _Please, be careful, anegimi._

* * *

 _Bastards._

Those mercenaries with magic weapons where from Hakucho. At first, she'd thought it odd for such specificity where it concerned her but now it made sense. She'd left Hakucho in shambles after attacking with Beleth's djinn equip, and she'd known that some had escaped her ending strike. What she hadn't counted on was for the mercenaries from the city to come harboring a grudge. To have one against the empire as a whole, sure; that was usually how early conquered people reacted. But because they feared the overall repercussion from the empire's military, they never acted on the urges.

A grudge directed against her, though? The only person she expected that from was her sister, not others.

 _But I did kill many of their soldiers._

Her thoughts and feet both stopped cold as a nearby explosion deafened her ears. It was like nails being driven through her eardrums at each explosion. That many of the people around her were screaming and crying didn't help with the pain. And with all the noise, she wouldn't have a hope at finding the mercenaries by listening for where they went.

But if she couldn't hear them out, then she would sniff them the mere thought of it, the gold bracelet with ingrained bones began to glow.

 _Spirit of Nature and Ferocity, in the name of my magoi, envelop me to grant me greater power. This I command of you and your household. Come forth and dwell within my body:_ _ **Marbas**_ _._

Her whole body became enveloped in light that quickly shrunk into the form of a child with mixed human and animal features. Her long hair had shortened and sprung out just above her shoulders; the color changed to dark orange. A pair of large, pointed ears, sprouted from her head of the same color except the tips were dyed a bright blue—the left with a gold loop earring—while a large upper portion of an animal skull rested atop her head and between her ears. Fur of the same warm orange covered other parts of her body. A tuft circled her neck just above her collarbone and budded out in front of her small chest covering her. A similar one ran from her midriff and came around her hips while a dark cloth wrapped around her hips with gold rings around. The tufts of hair also ran from her forearms and knees, lining them all the way down until her hands and feet became small claws and talons respectively. From her tailbone a trail of hair came down and formed a large tail that swelled from the volume, its tip dyed a bright blue.

Her face turned childish with large, stark blue eyes. From there white streaks ran down her cheeks. And her lower incisors grew a slightly bit larger into an under bite. The sash that hovered over her was of a similar bright blue color with golden rings at the extremities; the ends came around from behind her and crossed over her stomach before trailing off back again.

Ignoring the people around her that fled, she took a sniff of the air. Within a few seconds, she caught a distinct scent that didn't belong to Rakushou's heading out towards the outskirts of the city. They were escaping.

Snarling at the thought, Kohaku got down on all fours and dug down her talons and claws before propelling herself forward on a sprint. Flying in this form was inconvenient. Her power came from hand-to-hand combat and flying was out of the question for that. But she was anything but slow in this form.

 _This time none of you will escape._

Jumping over rooftops to avoid the incoming crowd, Kohaku scavenged after the mercenaries and within minutes reached were their trail ended. Just outside the gates of the city, she jumped over the remaining buildings and landed outside, smashing the ground beneath her and cutting their path. The group of men stopped in their tracks at seeing her, their magic weapons drawn.

"It's her," one shouted, and the rest brandished their weapons fully. She didn't know how they knew her form as Marbas but she wasn't about to ask them.

Standing up straight, she pointed at each person present: twelve of them. That's how many survived. This time, none will. Running her clawed thumb across her own neck put the men on edge enough to begin haphazardly attacking her.

Taking that to her advantage, she jumped out of their way and dove in with her talons, mangling them with each kick or swipe. Most fell on the first strike and laid wailing from their pain and bleeding out from their wounds. Three were left standing.

One clicked his tongue at seeing the carnage she'd left behind and turned quickly to whom she assumed led them. "It's a djinn-equip," he hissed.

"Magic can fight against her powers," the leader commented. But the way he so tightly gripped the hilt of his weapon and by the clear stench of perspiration, she doubted he believed in those words. Feigning a smug grin, he turned to Kohaku. "Are you sure you should leave your siblings unprotected?"

Kohaku bared her teeth at hearing that. Whatever they had planned she wouldn't let them start it. The third man smirked despite his shaking hands. "That palace isn't as safe as you think, dumb bitch!"

All at once, she saw red.

" _My king!"_ Kohaku's ears twitched at hearing Beleth through her clouded mind, making her hang on to the small ounce of her sanity that kept her calm. _"Don't be rash. They must have infiltrators in the palace. You must take them alive to unveil the rest."_

 _I'd rather kill them and sniff the rest out._

" _You cannot."_

Kohaku growled at his words as they anchored her mind. Taking deep breaths to control her anger and keep her rationality intact, it was working well until the leader decided to speak. "We'll kill each and every person here as you did with us." He scoffed and brandished the lightning whip out to attack, "Every last one of them is as good as dead."

" _My king—"_

 _No._

The men drew back at the sight of the beastly child before them. Her skin crackling with dark crimson energy as her snarl grew more ferocious along with her enlarging incisors.

 _I'm sick of holding back._

* * *

"She's utterly unbelievable."

Sousei groaned but did his best to not skip a beat as he ran down the long hallways of the palace followed closely by Masami. At arriving, he and Suisei split ways to cover more ground. Suisei had taken Kougyoku to her quarters to see their orders from Kohaku through. Sousei put it on himself to get Masami and alert the princes of what was happening in the city. Although Kougyoku would surely reach Kouha first to get the magicians to aid with putting out the fires, he wanted to be absolutely sure that the rest of the Imperial family was aware of the attack they had in their city.

In short bursts while on their way there, Sousei managed to recount what had happened on their morning escapade that led them to that moment. Leaving what didn't matter out, he didn't find her outburst surprising. She hated when Kohaku acted on her own without clearing things with her first. But they had bigger issues at hand than some petty inferiority complex.

"That doesn't matter now, Masami," he told her as they rounded a corner. "Are you sure they're there?"

"Y-Yes." He stopped briefly to let her catch up but frustration was making him more impatient by the second. Especially when all he wanted was to get this announcement over with so he could return out there to help. "There was to be a meeting just now. It's surely to have started."

"And they probably haven't heard then."

"The explosions were barely audible from here," Masami explained. "But they were visible."

With the palace some distance away from the main part of the city they were at, he wasn't surprised. And it meant they'd come with news. The closer they go to the meeting room, the more Masami began to sputter, unable to decide whether interrupting was a good idea.

"There's no time for that petty bullshit," he bellowed seconds before tearing through the doors of the room. The instant he set foot inside he felt the piercing stares from the ones present. That didn't matter, though, and he quickly brushed it aside. "The city's being attacked."

Koumei's eyes widened from the shock. "What?"

"A few minutes ago, Kohaku, Suisei, Kougyoku, and I were out in the city. Kohaku and the princess were ambushed."

Murmurs arose quickly but Kouen silenced them when he stood up. He glanced back at Sousei; it was an intense sight for him and all he did was ask one question. "Who?"

"Mercenaries," Sousei replied without missing a beat. Kouen's gaze came down for a second before taking his sheathed sword in hand and striding out of the room. Koumei followed quickly after him with Sousei and Masami following suit. Not caring at the moment, Sousei quickened his pace to stand beside him. "From what Kougyoku told us, they claimed to be from Hakucho. They have magic weapons. They've set parts of the city ablaze."

"Any dark vessels?" he asked straight forward as they headed to the main barracks.

"We didn't see them so there's no telling. My sister—Kohaku stayed behind to track them down. She wanted us to prioritize the city's safety."

But Kouen didn't seem to listen to any of that by the time they reached the barracks. Inside some soldiers trained while most lounged about; a few that he did recognize were the Household Members of both princes.

"Shou En, Seishuu Ri, Kin Gaku, Kokuton Shuu."

The four members stepped forth, heeding their call.

"Take an armada each, clear the streets and stop the damages from spreading." The soldiers that had heard began to mobilize without even being told as they gathered the rest of their comrades. "Mercenaries have infiltrated the city and have magic weapons in their possession. Capture them on sight."

"Yes, young master."

The whole crowd began to move then as all the soldiers available began to move. Kouen turned to Sousei with a slight glare, "Where did she go?"

Sousei shook his head. "She didn't say but she headed towards the southwestern gates."

"They must be trying to escape the city," Masami suggested before turning to both Kouen and Koumei. "The gates should be closed."

"We can't." Both siblings turned to Koumei at that conclusion. "The people's escape routes are through those gates in case of widespread attacks. Closing the gates means leaving them penned inside the fires."

"Our priorities are to stop any further damage to the city and catch those responsible for this," Kouen explained before turning to Sousei and Masami. "Order the Southern unit to the city as well under your command, Reizei Masami, to aid in the dousing of the fires." The sudden call made her jump before she bowed and heeded his orders.

Sousei was about to ask what he could do as well when three familiar voices shouted from different places across barracks as they approached. He turned at their calls to see Kougyoku and Suisei heading straight to him while Kouha ran up to Kouen and Koumei.

"T-The city—" Kouha stammered.

"We know," Koumei replied.

"Take the vanguard's magicians to the forefront, Kouha," Kouen instructed. The young prince nodded and turned to deliver his three magicians the message for the rest.

Sousei held Kougyoku by the shoulders to calm her down as she breathed heavily. Suisei couldn't keep her feet on the ground, jumping from one foot to the other. "What's wrong?" he asked them both.

"She's back," was all Kougyoku said in short breaths.

"Where is she?" Sousei asked, his brow furrowed.

"The west courtyard," Suisei answered him. "Princess Hakuei told us she and Prince Hakuryuu met her at the gate. She's got prisoners."

Before any other words could be exchanged, the two princes started making their way there. Kouha exchanged one look with Kougyoku before the two started after their brothers, the princess avidly retelling what had happened to her brother. Sousei and Suisei didn't lag much behind but the more he listened in, the more he started to worry again.

"You didn't see her?" Sousei asked his sister.

Sui shook her head, concern etched on her face that he was sure matched his to a tee. "The princess said it was Haku-nee though and she brought three of the mercenaries badly injured from the fight but still alive."

Badly injured. That didn't sound good at all. And the dread in him only mounted more all the way until they reached the west courtyard. From afar they caught a glimpse of Hakuei and Hakuryuu. Although together, there was still a noticeable distance between the two. Shockingly, Masami was there too with Hakuei. She must've ordered their men out quickly enough to return to find them before stumbling upon Hakuei and Hakuryuu.

As they reached the most secluded part of the courtyard, Sousei finally spotted the mercenaries and their sister; the three men kneeled in a row, greatly wounded but, just like Suisei had said, not critically so. Regrettable.

But what caught his attention the most was the sight of his sister. Kohaku had djinn equipped Marbas but instead of the small beast child he was used to he saw the djinn's other form: a full grown woman closer to her actual age.

Most of the attributes she had as the beast child were retained except for a few changes. Her fur changed colors: the warm oranges turning into dark reds, and the blue from before becoming brighter, almost luminescent. The short hair of her child form became a longer mane that ran down her back to the middle of her back. Her incisors grew considerably larger as well. The ears on her head became slightly smaller and more pointed and sharper in comparison. The fur on her arms began with two bands around her upper arms and then lined from her elbow to the back of her hands, showing off more human hands with sharpened claws. The lining on her legs started form the upper part of her thigh, tinted in bright blue before the darker red, and coming all the way to larger and more animalistic talons.

The dark clothe from before remained with the same strap of rings around them. Her tail, like her child form, retain its volume and brushed against the floor. A long band came around her neck with the same tuft of hair covering her grown chest and leaving some flesh to peak out from underneath. White markings were written on her bare abdomen while the sash wrapped around her like before; the sash itself a bright blue that faded into dark shades of purple towards the tips with the same rings on the end.

This figure towered over the three mercenaries that knelt before her as she stood behind them.

"Marbas…" Suisei said holding onto the necklace that laid on her bosom: the small diamond-shaped zircon inlaid in silver.

He clicked his tongue at the sight, "She raged."

"Raged?" Kougyoku whispered back overhearing them.

Instead of answering, Suisei shook her head and with one hand brought Kougyoku behind her before turning to Sousei, her brow furrowed in concern. "You think she understands us?"

"She's sane," he assured her before nodding towards the three that knelt before their sister. "They'd be dead if she weren't."

"Kohaku-san—" Hakuei stopped short when Hakuryuu grabbed her wrist. She turned to him but he doesn't say anything instead choosing to keep an eye on Kohaku.

At seeing this, Masami stepped forward getting Kohaku's attention as she tilted her head to glare at her. The blue of her eyes was blazing in anger with bits of red touching around her iris. Glaring back herself, Masami opened her mouth but before a word could come out, Kohaku bared her teeth and snarled. Sousei grimaced at that exchange; perhaps sane wasn't the right word to describe her right now.

But when those bright blues glanced down to meet his, he didn't feel the coldness that he'd seen her give Masami. Instead there laid a small warmth beneath the rage that brewed beneath her skin.

And if she paid even the littlest of attention to him, then maybe she would listen to him. "Kohaku…?" She blinked and tilted her head his way; there was no snarl, just this underlying tension. "Everything's being taken care of now. It's all going to be fine. You can undo your equip."

It wasn't until those last words that she bared her teeth. In that instant, she hauled one of the men from the back of the collar and threw them forward. He fell face first onto the ground and scrambled to his knees, every other second looking behind him at Kohaku.

He cowered down onto the ground at hearing her snarl and admits everything as he weeps. "W-We attacked the city to hurt the General. She laid waste to our people and to Hakucho; we wanted to do the same."

"You're part of the band of mercenaries hired by Hakucho?" Masami questioned.

"We're natives," another answered. "We couldn't forgive the woman that ravaged the city and people."

Made sense why they went after Kohaku then. Masami was about to interrogate them further when Hakuei stepped in, kneeling before the wounded mercenary. "The interrogations can wait." Sousei watched her line of sight and saw the small crowd of servants that had gathered out in the hallways.

Knowing that letting a crowd like this witness such things was not favorable in the least, he knelt beside Hakuei to reiterate their point as they both helped the man to his feet. At hearing a snarl, he turned to face Kohaku who glared down at them both. Although Hakuei wasn't sure of what to do, Sousei didn't falter with a comeback. "This isn't the time or place."

Kohaku didn't agree but she didn't stop them either as she stepped back to leave them some leeway to get to the other two she held captive. Taking this as a right-of-way to continue, Hakuei motioned to the servants and some of her soldiers to help bring them in. "Take them into custody. Be sure they're tended to for later interrogations."

Small groups of maids and soldiers came to each of the mercenaries to help them to their feet and take them away to holding cells.

Kohaku watched every movement of anybody that approached, listening closely to every movement and scrutinizing each person as they came to help. Sousei and Hakuei made themselves helpful as well by helping the man she knew to be their leader. So far all she heard were clothes shuffling and from afar could also hear the fires that were being put out. The cries and screams from the city were dwindling too. That the whole commotion was slowly but surely calming down unwound her a bit. But just as her shoulders relaxed and she felt her anger slipping away, she heard the distinct 'shh' of a blade scraping against its sheath. Her eyes didn't see the movement but her ears heard it loud and clear and it was nearest Sousei.

Not wasting a second or expending any words, Kohaku dashed forward and heard the blade's scraping coming from one of the maids. Although not fast enough to see where exactly it came from, she managed to shove Sousei behind her in time to receive the hit instead.

Anger boiled inside her to the point that she saw red again. Without a second thought, she grabbed the whole of the woman's throat in her open palm before pushing her down onto the ground with strength she didn't bother to gauge. Taking one knee to give her blow all the strength she could, she smashed the woman down so hard that her neck crushed on impact.

Kohaku didn't bother with the warm blood that was seeping through her fingers or the splatter that had reached herself. Neither did she seem bothered by the pieces of bone pulverized under the force of her hit. In one fell swoop, she'd decapitated the intruder.

 _Not this time._

Rage boiling in her blood, she turned to the three remaining. The whole crowd had seen what she'd done, the remains clearly left behind on both the ground and herself. And Sousei saw how deep that anger went by simply looking at her eyes that had turned into a vivid red.

The moment she bent low to strike, Sousei knew he had only a small window to counter it. Unsheathing his sword from its place on his hip, he rushed to stand before the mercenaries and took on Kohaku's frontal attack. The claws on her hands screeched against the steel of his sword as he held it downward to parry the blow. Although shaking, he was grateful that he'd summoned his Household Vessel seconds before stopping her. Sakhiba Shafarat was holding its damn best against Marbas' full strength.

Regaining some conscious, Kohaku's eyes shone a dark red contrasted with specks of blue. Sousei knew that despite the state she was in—being consumed by the rage she'd come to harbor in her—she was still fighting for some semblance of sanity; the fact that her eyes were mixed in color was proof enough.

Holding his position and tightening his grip on his sword, Sousei glared at Kohaku as she took a hold of the blade in her palm wanting to break what stood in the way of her and her prey. But he wasn't about to break down against her when she wasn't even thinking straight. "I can't allow you to kill them. They have information we need." She snarled and held the blade with both hands not caring that the steel was cutting into her palms, blood running down her fur and trickling to the ground. The hold she had on it was so strong that he could feel his arms shaking from the force it took to keep her at bay.

But instead of continuing the hostility against each other, he calmed himself. His lips quirked up into a half smile while his eyes watched her with tenderness. "You did everything you needed to keep us safe. Your job's done then, isn't it?"

He let his words sink in for a second but she held steadfast. In clear contradiction to that, though, he also saw her resolve falter. The grip on his sword began to lessen the slightest bit, letting his arms rest and stop shaking. Just a little bit more would do.

"'There is always another way.' I think if we can take your advice, you should be able to, too." His eyes shifted slightly to the side before returning to her, his smile turning crooked. "Besides…you're scaring them."

He saw the cloudiness in her eyes disappear instantly as she turned to the side and blinked. Her eyes widened the moment she caught sight of Kougyoku and Suisei. The two were leaning against each other, Suisei with pursed lips and glazed eyes and Kougyoku with eyes wide and sleeves covering her mouth. In both their gazes, she saw the deep-seated fear he mentioned. It couldn't have been more obvious and it pained her heart that she'd caused that in them.

A warm touch to her hand got her attention and made her turn back to Sousei as he let his sword down while easily taking her hands off of the blade. She turned not wanting to see the expression on his face—fear too? Disappointment? —but her breath hitched at seeing nothing but warmth in his cobalt eyes and a tender smile on his lips. "We're safe, **Hakuchi**. There's no danger anymore." Sheathing his sword, he spread out his arms to her. "Nothing's going to happen to us now."

Those words made her sob and without thinking Kohaku threw herself at Sousei's open arms as a gold light enveloped her. It wasn't bright and it only encompassed her as she morphed back into her child form before even reaching his embrace. She wrapped her tiny arms around his neck and held onto him with every fiber of strength she had, her tail unconsciously following behind as it wrapped protectively around his waist.

"That's better," he whispered as he patted her head, holding her close as she buried her face against his shoulder, her ears bending back against her head. Lifting his head, he turned to Hakuei before nodding to let her know that it was okay to continue. Hakuei took his word and asked Koumei for help as to what to do with the mercenaries.

Most of the ones present remained quiet as the rest took care of the issue and the gruesome aftermath. Kouha and Kougyoku stuck together mostly because he didn't want to leave her alone after what happened. Suisei stayed close to Kougyoku wanting someone to hold on to seeing as Sousei was dealing with Kohaku. Masami went with Hakuei and Koumei to help with the remaining culprits since she didn't want to be involved with cleaning what her sister had done. Kouen dispersed the crowd of maids and soldiers ordering them to help out with the city's state with what they could contribute. This disbanded a lot of the noise quickly.

Suisei, seeing that it was much calmer now, decided to approach Sousei with the prince and princess following behind. She grabbed at Sousei's back making him turn sideways with the little beast in his arms. "Is she going to be okay?"

He averted his gaze and stopped patting her before calling her attention. As Kohaku raised her head, the three were surprised to see huge tears forming in her eyes. Bringing her to face him, he smiled as he wiped them away. "Are you ready to turn back now?"

She gazed up and sniffed before nodding. He muttered 'good' before leaving some space for her. The light enveloped her again as she undid her djinn equip and burst out in tiny specks of gold as she returned to normal. As she leaned her weight on her feet while still holding onto his shoulders, she winced and stepped back to put her weight on her right leg.

As they all looked down, the two girls cried out in worry at seeing the small blade with its hilt broken sticking out from her left thigh.

"A-Are you okay?" Kouha asked seeing as the wound was still bleeding a bit.

"I'll go get Ka Koubon," Kougyoku added unable to think of anything else.

But before any of them could do or say anything more, Kohaku reached down, grabbed the blade in her hand, and yanked it out in one pull without flinching. The moment she did she undid one of the ribbons from around her waist and quickly went to tie it around the wound that began to bleed more while the others scrammed about like headless chickens.

Being a little calmer, Kohaku chuckled at their concern. It wasn't too deep of an injury. Besides, she'd grown quite a pain tolerance over the years; so although she felt it, the injury wasn't as bad as it looked for her. Her small reprieve didn't last, though. Seeing the shadow that towered over them all, she lifted her gaze to find Kouen. The other three took a step back the moment he drew out his sword, brandishing it down at her.

"What're you doing?" Suisei shrieked coming to Kohaku's side like a stricken cat.

"Wait, please," Sousei called, placing an arm protectively over her. "She's done nothing wrong."

"Wrong." That answer, more than the blatant weapon pointed her way, baffled her. Before she could ask, though, she saw the coral wings of Phenex's healing magic sprout from the metal ornament as it shone. The wings enveloped the three of them as it healed every wound, little or big. Feeling her leg better, she tested it and gently put weight on it to find it like new. She was about to thank him when he saw a small tinge of something else in his stoic expression—something reminiscent of exasperation. "You still haven't learned anything."

Baffled by his statement, she doesn't have time to ask the meaning of his words. The twins begin to thank him for helping them but he doesn't acknowledge them. Instead he leaves, telling Kouha that his vanguard still has a job to do with repairing the damages done to the city.

He doesn't hesitate to agree but looks back at Kohaku. Lips pursed, he dawdles around for a few seconds before turning to Kougyoku. "Stay with her, yeah?" Kougyoku sheepishly complies and Kouha isn't slow to then face Kohaku who's surprise to see his frown. "Go and rest, you got that?"

Confused—somewhat—about his sudden shifting emotions, she can't help but nod. _"Thank you for your concern, Kouha. I'll be all right now."_

"You better," he mumbles, almost like a slight threat, before running off to his three magician attendants that quickly update him what's happening.

"What about the Southern army?" Suisei asked, remembering that Masami had only given them orders and let them go.

" _I'll go—"_

Sousei stopped her signing with his hand. "Nowhere. You, Suisei, and Kougyoku will go rest." She frowned at that but he simply shook his head. "You've been up to too much today. Give yourself some time to recover."

"He's right, anegimi." Beside her, Kougyoku reached out to touch her arm but stopped herself short and instead gave her a smile. She was being careful around her now and it turned Kohaku's stomach to have caused the sudden distance. "You should rest."

Not having enough strength at the moment to fight them about it, she nodded and let Suisei and Kougyoku lead her away to her room. Sousei, now alone, headed out back towards the city where he knew the rest of their battalion was dealing with the repercussions of what had happened. The more he thought about it, the more it never ceased to amaze him how many burdens their last mission had laid upon them.

The worst was that it seemed to be a gift that kept on giving. His eyes wondered over to where Hakuei, Koumei, and his sister had taken the mercenaries that remained. Certainly the rest had been disposed of by Kohaku as well seeing as she didn't bring those around. He sighed at the idea that even those pieces of scum survived but didn't bother thinking more about it, at least for now he wouldn't. After all, he'd be sure that this 'gift' wouldn't give anything more to them.

* * *

It's impossible.

Kohaku sighed for what felt like the twentieth time. The late evening had come faster than she thought. Sick to her stomach, she'd skipped the dinner that Suisei and Kougyoku offered. And although the she appreciated the small slumber party they were having—the two girls and Kouha who arrived much later—she just couldn't conceive any sleep. Even after Kouha had informed them that all the damages had been assessed and most compensated from what had happened, things still gnawed at her mind.

The things she did that afternoon didn't let her sleep that soundly. Killing during war or battles wasn't a foreign subject to her; she'd done it plenty of times, unwilling or not, but that didn't mean that such actions didn't bother her still. Not only that but Kouen's words troubled her as well. What the hell had he meant by saying she hadn't learned anything?

She hadn't spent the last month burning the midnight oil every day from dawn until dusk to not have come even a little bit farther from where she started. And that doubt and annoyance just didn't let her be. Before she could let it gnaw at her any more, she got up and left the room as quietly as she could and headed to the study.

It was well past midnight but she was sure that he would be there. He'd always been there the few times she needed to go into that specific study and she doubted that tonight would be any different. Not caring that she was in her night clothes, she strode through the dark hallways quickly reaching the study. Knowing if he wasn't there then there wouldn't be a need to be quiet, she opened the door without a care and went it. Unsurprisingly, there he sat reading through scrolls, a few already done by the looks of the small stack he'd set aside. Not caring for courtesy as things stood, she walked right to stand beside his chair behind the desk.

He took a few seconds before he languidly strayed his eyes from the scroll he was reading to face her. "I thought you would have postponed your studies for the night."

There it was again. That tone and look of exasperation. The mere reminder of that annoyed her even further and set her free of having common sense when she simply asked him straight forward. _"What did you mean that I haven't learned anything?"_

"I meant what I said," was all he granted but that wasn't enough for her.

That he'd gone straight back to his reading extremely peeved her. Clapping her hands to get his attention back, not caring about courtesy, she continued her one-sided conversation. _"Tell me why."_

His eyes slowly came up to hers and he sighed resentful but found it in him to answer her. "I know of that fervor of yours now after having seen it that made it easy for you to be followed even without having the proper training to hold your father's position. But you still haven't learned anything of what I asked the day you arrived. What you did today—in front of all of us, nonetheless—showed just how little control you got over your own mind. You still have not learned the kind of patience that war requires or the mental strength to reign in your emotions."

Kohaku drew back a bit at that clean hit to her most blatant weakness. That didn't deter her will to get a real answer. _"Marbas is an untamed djinn. I lose some of my self-consciousness in that equip."_

"That only goes to show that you are mentally weak. A strong mind wouldn't lose control when equipped, even with a feral djinn." Fed up with his indifferent attitude, she slammed her palm down against the desk making a resounding _smack_. His eyes wondered to her hand on his desk before lifting his gaze to her. "That there is your inability to control yourself. You let your emotions take over without thinking the situation over."

 _I don't need to fucking think._

But all gall quickly left her though when he raised from his sit. Because they were mere inches from one another now, she had to look up from how he towered over her. His presence and bearing, even in such causal instance, sent clear signs of dominance and power, of authority and poise. And a small part of her feared the man in this state; it feared the person he became when, as he said, he detached himself from his emotions. But all the same there was another part, a much larger one, that didn't want to be intimidated by him.

Kouen didn't stray his eyes from her own and saw the conviction she held as they shown brightly as she kept her brow furrowed in defiance.

"You have potential; multiple djinn wouldn't have chosen you otherwise." At this he frowned a bit in distaste and she didn't fail to see it. "But you're wasting what could be great potential by not thinking things through.

" _It's worked."_

"Clearly," he replied, sarcastically. It confused her though because it sounded exactly the same as anything else he said. "Had I been as irritated as you were, I would have waited until the interrogations were being done. There is no restriction to what can be done to extract information there, away from prying eyes and ears. _Never_ in front of others."

Now that she actually _thought_ about it, he made sense. Her pride wanted for her to deny that he was right but she knew better. Feeling defeated, she lowered her gaze deep in thought. She didn't want to be stuck in the same place. She didn't want to forever be liable for such tragedies again.

" _How…do I fix this—myself?"_

The question made Kouen sigh as he touched his temple, feeling a slight headache beginning to come to him. "You have to invest yourself into it."

" _I have already."_ What did he think she'd been doing the past month? Having fun and lurking around for gossip? Thinking the exasperation contagious, she pursed her lips. _"Can't someone teach me?"_

"Not properly." He stayed silent as he thought for a second before lowly groaning in his throat. "I suppose I could teach you."

" _You?"_

He lowered himself back into his chair before nodding. "As you said, I have plenty of experience dealing with happenings out in the battlefield. Teaching you how I've grappled with such situations would be much easier and effective." Before he even left room for her to agree or not, he spoke up again. "But I won't be doing this freely. If I consider you a lost cause, I won't waste my time in teaching you something you can't possibly learn."

She wanted to back talk for the skepticism he had of her but she swallowed that back and instead nodded. _"You won't. I want to learn to control this and myself and not let it take over again."_

"It won't be simple but it is doable." Kouen sighed but seemed a bit more relaxed this time as he picked up his scroll adamant to continue his studies. "Meet me tomorrow at the same training grounds. We start at dawn."

Kohaku nodded enthusiastically. Finally, some direction. Perhaps he was right and she'd approached her learning the wrong way. Reading and studying had done some good to her but it hadn't been the right way to deal with what she lacked. Maybe having actual training to better herself and her emotional state would be the best way to better herself out in the actual battlefield.

If so—if this would help her keep those she cared about safe—then she'd take it.

* * *

How dank.

Masami treaded carefully so as to not dirty herself through the dungeons. Being good with stealth and seeing how late it was, she gambled there wouldn't be as many guards as there should be. Then again with only three prisoners to guard, she doubted much manpower was needed.

"How distasteful…" she mumbled as she walked through the cobblestoned underground cells.

And yet here she was sneaking in. It was for a good reason, though. Ever since she found out the mercenaries that had stormed the city had been residents of Hakucho and that they had purposefully targeted Kohaku, she'd wanted to have a word with them. Thankfully because of their condition, she knew that they had only been interrogate for a few hours before being left to rest which meant that she still had time to ask some of her own without interruptions.

But her questions were only a few and depending on their answers it would be the last they answered. Finding their holding cell, she was about to turn into the grand cell but stopped short when she heard noises coming from somewhere else. At first she thought it had been them shuffling around but as she peaked over the corner she saw a familiar silhouette that climbed down before the disheveled prisoners.

 _Well, well, well. Seems my cute little brother got ahead of me._

Sousei walked into the cell unnoticed, the sword in his hands with a blade lined in a silver glow. He must've used Sakhiba Shafarat to infiltrate in without being detected. Smart boy. The men at seeing him, stumbled back but their restraints, being bolted to the floor, allowed them little distance from him.

Cold and distant himself, Sousei eyed each and every one of them before exhaling. "All right. Let's start easy. You understand me, correct?" The men didn't dare answer him and that only serve to anger him. Stabbing the ground and letting the noise at the tip of his sword pierce through the hard stone made them all cower in place. " _I said_ , do you understand me?"

The men nodded.

"Good." Taking his sword back, he held it by his side before kneeling before them. "Now, you did a deal of damage to our capital today. And the punishment you'll receive— because, believe me, you'll be punished—will be nothing short of brutal. But it won't be as harsh as what I'll do to you if you don't answer my questions with the truth. Are we clear?" They nodded again. "Excellent. Now that we're on the same page, let's clear the air, shall we? Your lot of mercenaries fought at Hakucho and it was you who fought against Reizei Kohaku. Firstly, what I want to know is where you obtained your weapons?"

"M-Magnoshtadt. They're giving them out like nothing close to the borders."

 _Magnoshtadt, huh._

It didn't surprise Masami, really. That city of magicians, albeit small, had in their disposition great tools but were rather secluded to any outsiders except other magicians. And if they weren't willing to sacrifice some of their own, those tools they made had to be tested somehow.

"What about the black weapons?" Sousei asked.

"Those were given to us by a man. A magician, I think. B-But not from Magnoshtadt." The one mercenary turned to the other beside him for more details.

"We haven't seen him since a year or two ago. He provided Hakucho with the black weapons saying they were a gift to defend ourselves against invaders."

"Did he help get so many people together to fight? Or was it someone else's idea?"

"His. He helped gather the mercenaries and people and armed them."

Now that there was interesting.

"Did he have a name?"

"N-None that he told us."

Dead ends weren't something he particularly liked but if coerced confessions didn't give results, nothing else would. Those were the few pertinent questions he had. If they knew, they had only bits of valuable information. Most of this, Hakuei had gotten out of them with the few hours he got with them. The mention of the man was exempted though or they didn't reveal that detail. But having those questions, the most important ones, answered was what he'd wanted. All that was left was one last question.

"Now, whether I let you gentlemen rest for the night will depend on the answer you give me next." The men shuffled from side to side in fear. Sousei squatted to be with them at eye level. "Now, your lot fought against my sister, General Reizei, when the battle came to an end. She equipped and killed most yet you survived. What I want to know is what you witnessed when fighting her?"

"She was feral!"

Understandable, Masami thought.

"She ravaged through the soldiers like a storm. There were few who could oppose her or protect themselves from her attacks."

Masami started to dislike having come to hear praises on the girl. Despite that she continued listening wanting to make sure that that had been all they've seen.

"S-She went mad—shouted that she would destroy us all for what we had done!"

 _Uh oh._

Sousei stayed still and quiet before he stood up from his place. He brought his blade up to rest over his shoulder; he tapped it a few times against it, mulling over what they'd said. In the end he sighed and glanced down at them with pity. "I hoped it wouldn't come down to this. Forgive me."

Before any of the men could ask or fear the meaning behind his words, he swept Sakhiba Shafarat across creating a sharp blade of sound that cleanly cut through all their necks, decapitating them. The bodies fell back with a hard thud but Sousei softened their fall with a sheet of sound before letting them fall against the stone floor.

He took a deep breath before walking away into the shadows. Masami heard him then running off and out of the prison. She tapped her finger against her lips as she thought over what she'd just witnessed. The answers Hakuei had gotten had been pretty much the same from what Sousei had gotten from them. From the looks of it, they had been nothing but pawns on someone else's game. And she highly doubted they would have known who their puppeteer was.

Regardless of who pulled their strings, Sousei had saved her a lot of work. She hid the small vial with dark plum-colored liquid she'd brought along back inside the folds of her clothes. Deprived from the opportunity of trying her new concoction, she pouted but had to thank Sousei.

With this, at least she'd get to keep her own puppet a while longer.

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _I'm exhausted. I literally start school tomorrow and I'm up at almost one proofreading this chapter for you guys. This beat my longest chapter by a longshot at 29 pages and 18K words. So I hope you guys like it c:_

 _New year sometimes means new people to meet. And I've got some people who Followed and Favorited this story that I've got to thank:  
_ _ **\- Handara  
\- Kaschey  
\- mun3litKnight  
\- krt2614  
\- Shade Sparda  
\- brokenwings1995  
\- shipudden-piece  
\- YukimuraShion**_

 _And don't think I'm forgetting you, Reviewers. Because I couldn't get online to answer you all through PMs this time around, I'll be answering all here.  
\- __**grimxchixshiroxmomoxorixx**_ _: Glad you liked their moments. It's gonna be hard to write them together but I hope the chemistry works itself out. And yeah, he saw cx  
\- __**Miqila**_ _: If I'm making you hate a character, I hope it's because I'm doing a good job at writing her and the story as a whole. And Kohaku, well, we'll see what you think as time goes on. I like your thought process by the way. Aside from being a story, this is a puzzle. One that I intend to drop hints: big or small. Some may be in flashbacks like in last chapter and this one, others in subtler ways or places. I won't deny or admit to any of your questions simply to keep you thinking c:  
\- __**Guest**_ _: Thank you!  
\- __**Handara**_ _: Thanks so much! And yes, there are many questions. Like I said, this is a puzzle and finding answers is what you've got to do ;3 As for Kouen and his inner thoughts on Kohaku, well, they'll be sprinkled here and there.  
\- __**mun3litKnight**_ _: Curiosity is a good friend to have. Sorry I take so long to update. Upside is that they tend to be long for some goddamn reason -w- And don't wish ill on those you don't know about :) This is something that I wanted all to see, if you get to this part of the chapter where I just ramble on, but this story has but one truth that you should all keep while: unreliable narrators. Like that meme: trust no one, even yourself._

 _And that's all for now folks. Thanks for being so patient with me. I'll be a bit slower than usual now that school's back up but I'll try my best to write a little every day. A little goes a long way, after all. So for now I hope you enjoyed this long chapter—the first one of 2017!—and stay tuned for the next chapter._


	5. Occam's Razor

_**Chapter Five:**_

 _Occam's Razor_

* * *

It was barely the morning after the attack and the day already wasn't going so well.

First, her new training session with Kouen fell short in time when he was called to assess the repercussions that were still left from yesterday. She didn't take it much to heart because a few things were still leftover to take care of; the recovery time of the city took her by surprise, however. Most of the citizens were already up and running through their normal routine with only remnant problems. She tried searching for Seijin after breakfast to spar but the boy had shown concern over the people and wanted to help. She let him go to the city and help with what he could if he so wanted. He thanked her and swiftly left without another word. His compassion was something she liked very much but without him she had fewer choices as to how to pass her morning. Neither Kouha nor Kougyoku were free either and the twins had gone out to help as well.

Everybody was busy. It kind of made her wary to not be, actually. But knowing her time could be better spent doing something else, she headed to the study. Perhaps putting in some hours to more studying would help her pass the time. What she hadn't expected was to find the second prince napping there.

Out of everybody, she thought he would be in charge of scheduling repairs throughout the city with his expertise on strategizing and all. Yet here she found him, sprawled across a desk with scrolls beneath him. His mane of red hair spread everywhere, it hid his face but by the soft snoring she could tell he was out cold.

Speaking of cold, it was freezing in the study and it amazed her how he found any comfort sleeping like that. Feeling sorry and a bit of obligation, she removed her outer cloak and put it over him where he sat.

 _At least this way he'll be warmer._

Kohaku's fingers brushed against his hair as it poked out and a rare thought came to her. Despite being full brothers, Kouen and Koumei were distinctly different. For one, Koumei's hair was a slight bit darker than Kouen's. And something she had duly noted after they met had been that Koumei held slightly softer, dare she say more feminine features.

Taking a scroll and sitting herself across from the desk where he slept, Kohaku found her mind wondering to their younger days as she watched. If she remembered correctly, Koumei's attitude hadn't changed much since back then. As he was now, sleeping so peacefully without a care, Kohaku could picture him perfectly laying down out in the courtyard with pigeons lazing around him. Her mind wondered off more remembering how she liked sitting with him humming as he read, liking the nature around them. His pigeons liked it too and at times he would ask her to sing as he fed them. She liked the birds just not touching them; animals, especially birds, weren't too friendly when she approached them. So instead she would stand behind Koumei as he fed his pets.

Other times she found herself napping with him only to be awakened by his brother who'd been out training with Prince Hakuyuu and Hakuren.

 _Ah, that's right._

She forgot that she was actually friendly with Kouen at one point.

 _We're three—no, five years apart._

Back before the fire and before her family left back to Shika, she had been a little over eleven. The twins had just turned five, and Masami was at her peak at fifteen. Thinking back on it, she found it rather curious how much time she actually spent with the two brothers either lazing around or learning how to wield a sword or spear. To say she was an odd child would be an understatement. But before her mind could drag on the past, she shook her head and began her studying.

Already having gone through a quarter of the library in her month there, she was quickly running out of topics to focus on. She understood the basics in most and kept a separate stack of scrolls with those and the slight modifications she'd made through her studying. So far she had three completed and a fourth in the making. Kohaku had a few doubts, however, of how it'd work in an actual scenario. She was brushing the tip of her feathered pen across her nose, thinking, when her ears caught the _click_ of the study's doors opening. The steps, loud and thumping, approached them and she cringed at every one. Her eyes came over to Koumei as he still slept but gasped at seeing him shift. Not wanting anything to disturb him as sound asleep as he was, Kohaku rushed out of her seat towards the entrance and met Kouen halfway across the study.

 _Of course it's him._

Who else walked around making such a ruckus. She swore, for as much as the man was well built he had no grace whatsoever. Dashing forward to stand before him, Kohaku blocked his way.

 _"Please, refrain from making so much noise."_

"Whatever are you talking about?" Kohaku frowned before stomping her foot as lightly as she could, mimicking his movements. He didn't acknowledge any of her remarks and instead sidestepped her to walk further into the study. Wanting the place quiet for his brother, she skipped ahead of him again and blocked his way one more time, a frown now marking her face. In turn, he raised an eyebrow, incredulous of her actions. Instead of wasting words on him, Kohaku lifted a finger and shushed him before slowly walking the few steps left into the study. Following her inside, Kouen finally laid eyes on his brother sleeping and turned to the woman beside him who motioned at Koumei. Her point made, she walked over and took her sit again, tucking her legs beneath her and putting the scroll on her lap. "So this is where he's been."

Kouen sighed and walked over to Koumei before he started reaching towards him. Seeing this, Kohaku scrambled out of her seat, knocking over the things on her lap, and got to him just in time to grab at his forearm to stop him from waking Koumei up.

"As amusing as your previous attempts were, this is getting old," Kouen mentioned, merely tugging at his arm and pulling her along a bit from the sheer strength. "He's been neglecting his duties. Again." She shook her head unable to talk and not wanting to let go of the hold on his arm. Instead she glared at him as if daring him to wake Koumei up. He pulled at his arm again and she came with it, scraping at the floor as she tried to use her minute weight to hold him back. Sighing, he dropped his arm and turned to her. "Fine. I need to speak with you either way."

That caught her attention. She released him, her expression changing from anger to perplex in a second. _"What for?"_

He didn't waste time either. "The three mercenaries you captured yesterday were murdered last night."

Kohaku's blood ran cold at those words, her arms coming up to wrap around herself. _"Murdered?"_

He sighed and went to take a sit himself as she followed wanting to know more. "They were decapitated. Single clean cuts from what the healers could discern."

 _"That's...horrible."_

Kouen eyed her for a moment as she stared down at her lap mulling over the information he'd given her. There wasn't much regret about their deaths but certainly a bit of sympathy. "Every guard assigned to them has been questioned and none know who could have gone in to commit the murder."

 _"Were any proper interrogations able to take place?"_

"A few. There was still more to answer though." It was here that he came to glance at her. The longer he stared the more her brow furrowed until she gasped and glared back.

 _"I did not—"_

"Of course you didn't. You were with me the whole of last night," he replied, reaching over to take one of the scrolls that she had laid on the small table between the two chairs.

She nodded and thought herself dumb for thinking he'd blindly accuse her of something like that. _That's a relief._ And of course, if she didn't do it, then surely the others— That single thought made her stop in her tracks before turning back to Kouen. _"You're not doubting_ them _, are you?"_

He eyed her over the scroll as he skimmed through it before going back to it. "If you mean your siblings, no. I inquired and they have alibis for last night. According to Kouha and Kougyoku, Suisei was with them. Masami claims that Sousei was with her, as well."

She sighed in relief. If they found a shred of evidence, they'd persecute. Murder was something taken very seriously here, against a prisoner or citizen didn't matter. She thought of it as a 'guilty until proven innocent' system and although it was unfair to the few innocent, she knew that most murders, as they were, were pretty open-and-shut cases. That left a bigger question: who did it? But as she inquired further herself about what would become of the case, he only gave vague answers. They'd look into it, was all he said about it. Kohaku supposed that if they wanted to keep some things hidden, they had all the right to. Her thoughts were driven out of her when she heard him starting to move.

Kohaku stood quickly to follow him in case he planned to do what she thought he would. And like so, he began to walk towards Koumei and she instantly blocked him. He sighed, this time out of frustration. "Why are you so adamant of keeping me away?"

 _"If he falls asleep while working, then it's reasonable to think that he's exhausted. Why not let him rest?"_

"This isn't new," Kouen replied. "He's not exhausted."

 _"How can you be so sure?"_

Kohaku sort of regretted not keeping herself in check when she saw a small tick on his jaw. "For having no voice, you talk much."

 _That's a first._ Regardless of her confusion, she stood her ground. Might as well since she already started to dig her grave. But she did try to at least soften the dirt a little. _"It's tactless as both his brother and commander to not let him rest if he's this tired, wouldn't you think so?"_

"He's rested enough, I'm sure." But as he was reaching out to shake Koumei awake, she diverted his hand. Unfortunately, he struck the desk and the sound itself startled Koumei awake. Kohaku pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed as Koumei looked groggily back at them.

"My brother and king." Koumei yawned before turning to glance at Kohaku. "General Kohaku. Forgive me, I must've dozed off. It's been far too long of a day and I haven't slept for three days straight."

"Stop lying," Kouen said rather straight forward and crossed his arms. "I thought you were going to assess the damages."

"Oh that," he said, rubbing at his eyes and yawning again, "I did." He passed the scroll he'd been napping under across the table. Curious, Kohaku eyed the parchment, carefully watching for each number and subtraction and addition of them as it talked over the damages done and their cost.

Before she could read all of it, though, Kouen took it from the table and read it at a surprisingly fast pace before rolling it up. "Go give this to the treasury and let the city officials handle the reconstruction of the damages." But as both turned to Koumei, he had already fallen back asleep. Kouen, out of the blue, slapped at his shoulder with such a resounding _smack_ that Kohaku jumped in her skin and reached to cover her ears as the sound bounced roughly in her eardrums alongside Koumei's cry of pain.

As the two bickered back and forth, she had to fight back a chuckle that threatened to bubble out. Young or not, they truly hadn't changed. And perhaps that made it a little less stressful being in their presence, princely title and all. Both turned to face her at hearing her laughter coming out. Since it'd already surfaced, there wasn't any point in hiding it. She laughed some more before meeting their gazes and shrugging.

 _I'll laugh if you won't._

Koumei scoffed before yawning once more and rubbing at his shoulder. "Where you in need of anything, General?"

Kohaku blinked a couple times at being addressed amidst the 'tender' sibling quarrel before shaking her head. _"I came to study since there wasn't much else to do."_

"If you've got enough time to lounge around with Koumei, then training will do for you," Kouen commented.

This made Kohaku raise a brow, confused. _"It's late, isn't it?"_ If one could call the bright afternoon late that is. But for him who trained before the crack of dawn, she figured it would be. _"Besides, wasn't your highness busy this morning?"_

He clicked his tongue at reading that sentence. "I've seen enough to know you have no respect, so might as well not bother." She flinched but smiled regardless. "My schedule has been cleared. Might as well continue where we left off this morning if you have so much free time."

She couldn't say to the contrary, so she nodded.

"Meet me at the training grounds in half an hour," he said sternly.

Not wasting any time, Kohaku put her scrolls away before sprinting of to prepare for the late session. Kouen remained with his brother in the study; half an hour gave him some time to relax.

"You weren't joking about helping her."

Red eyes tinted gold met the much lighter, almost pinkish eyes of his brother. Koumei stood up, putting away what he'd used to do his work. Kouen, however, sat back onto a chair nearby. "She's a liability as she is now."

"That much?" Koumei inquired.

"In the wrong circumstances she will be if she doesn't fix what's wrong now."

Koumei mulled over that, tapping his chin with his fan. He leaned against one of the shelves and eyed one scroll that she'd neglected to put away. Must've forgotten it. Walking over to it, he unrolled it to find strategies of more recent wars. The first his brother and king had been a part of, actually. What dampened his mood, though, was seeing the names of the late princes of Kou. Thinking back on those times, he recalled spending time with the woman he now referred to as General. "She hasn't changed, has she?"

"She's grown since then, Koumei," Kouen replied not missing a beat as to who he was referring to. "We all have."

"Not in that manner. What I mean is she still has that..." Koumei paused, tapping his chin a couple times more while thinking of the right word to use. "Peculiarity?" When he saw his brother giving him an odd look, he simply shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know what else to call it."

"Stubbornness. Recklessness. Idiocy. There's plenty to pick from."

"Perhaps it's all of those. Then again, maybe not." Koumei rolled his shoulder from the ache that panged at it. "It's the same from back then but I still can't put a name to it."

"Whatever it may be, I'm sure it's of no importance." Kouen stood from his sit before heading for the door, "Be sure to have dinner. You've skipped it the last couple of days."

Koumei blinked, amazed that he'd noticed such thing. But he smiled while watching his brother's receding back as he left the study. The younger prince sighed in defeat knowing that he had more work to do. Turning towards the desk in order to put away the scrolls he'd use, he barely noticed the coat that laid sprawled against the chair he'd been sitting on. It was of a light blue color. A shade lighter than the ruqun that the general had been wearing. At seeing it there, he scoffed.

Attentive. Perhaps that word described a good part of them both.

* * *

 _Son. Of. A..._

"You're falling short still," Kouen declared from across the field as he brandished his sword. "Again."

Kohaku grimaced as she lifted her head from bending over, beads of sweat rolling off her face and down her neck. Being djinn equipped for so long was starting to take a toll on her stamina. Kouen had argued with her that if she wanted to gain control, then training with the form that forsake her of it would be best. And because simply djinn weapon equipping didn't give the same output that fully equipping Marbas did, she knew that he had a point. But after four hours and as exhausted as she was— both mentally and physically—she was starting to lose both her temper and her restraint.

 _No, don't fall for it._

That was exactly why she was training. If she gave up control now, it'd be all for naught. Shifting back into her child form, she squatted down and buried her face between her knees before scratching at her head and ears. Kouen watched as Kohaku scratched and scratched, apparently trying to dispel her emotions. And as she lifted her gaze, he saw the red rims around her dark pupils disappear alongside her mounting emotions.

"Learning a way to get rid of it?" he asked twirling the sword about himself.

 _"It's...hard."_ Her signs were much sloppier in this form, he noticed, and it seemed mostly because her claws got in the way. Falling back to a seat, she brought her front paws against the ground before raising her hind leg to scratch behind her ear. A few scratches were all it took for her to stop in her tracks and turn up, pink dusting her cheeks. _"S-Sorry. Force of habit."_

Kouen supposed that, much like he was in his Agares equip, she too took on some animal instinct. And although he now had better control of it, he remembered a time when he too would be overtaken by such habits on occasions. "Change again."

She stood in all fours, shaking all around before getting up on her hind legs and stretching her arms over her head. She shook one last time before coming down on all fours again. Her tail swayed from side to side as she bent low, readying her pounce. At seeing her claws digging into the ground, Kouen took his stance and readied himself as she dashed forward. Kicking her talon down, she jumped up, tumbling through the air before changing in midair into her grown form and extending her clawed hand down for the impact. Brazing himself for it as well, Kouen stood his ground with Astaroth's djinn weapon equip at the ready.

Her claws clashed against the steel and fire with a deafening screech. The sound that the flames gave when her claws, soaked in energy, dug into his sword was almost like thousands of birds chirping loudly. The sound was so high-pitched and loud; he saw her ears flick back against her head for cover as her head flinched. She clicked her tongue as he blocked it but didn't give him a second to think. Dealing slash after kick after slash, Kohaku's breath came in short pauses every time she attacked but she refused to yield even when all her attacks were being thwarted.

Parrying her away on her last attack, Kohaku jumped back to give herself some distance. He scoffed at the poor attempt to barrage him, making her snarl. But before he could reproach her for being so easily taunted, her Djinn Equip transformed back to her child form. Panting heavily, she sat back. Kouen drew back at seeing her so dead beat; her magoi must be reaching its limits. Almost four hours, he mulled. Not terrible but could be better.

"We're done for today," he told her as he sheathed his sword. "We will resume from this point tomorrow."

Glad to finally have a breather, she laid back but held onto her equip liking much better what she felt now in it. It was somewhat strange and new. With Marbas, her mental or emotional state came closer to fury or emptiness. Never this lightness. It wasn't bad. It actually felt...nice. But as she laid there taking a breath and basking in the new feeling, her ears perked at a strange sound.

A sharp _swoosh._

It was distant but it was coming towards their direction fast. Distinguishing the threat, she jumped out of the way in time to dodge an icicle that whirled through the air. Instead of hitting her, it pierced the tree trunk behind her with the ice quickly consuming the tree in ice. Kouen turned at the noise and watched as Kohaku skidded to a stop, her ears perked and eyes strained where the icicle had shot from. They twitched a split second before she leaped away to avoid them as they struck different places, piercing them all the same. She vaulted from the ground to tree branches and back again, avoiding each ice shard as it came at her. Not caring where she went, Kohaku skidded past Kouen letting one of the shards past her to his direction. Kouen drew his sword and with Astaroth's flames melted the ice to nothing.

A resounding _thump_ was followed by the crackling of ice. He turned about to see that as tired as she had been, one icicle finally caught Kohaku and, although it didn't pierce through her, it burst out to pin her against a large trunk. High and in the middle of it, the ice sunk deeper against her, freezing her over the tree and immobilizing her. Panting and sweating, she didn't relent from undoing her equip and continued to struggle to get out of the ice as it began to freeze the tree to its core.

"That was fucking pathetic, _Taozi!"_

Kohaku's struggle halted for a split second at hearing the voice that called to her. More importantly, she knew exactly who it'd been. Only one person ever called her that nickname: the same person that gave it to her. Lifting her gaze, she saw as her country's magi descended and stopped before her while floating in midair. Judar twirled his wand in one hand while the other laid on his hip. A smug smirk came to his face and those dark red irises gazed into her own with curiosity. "Five years and this is what I find? A weak woman who can't even control her djinn? What a fucking waste you were!"

 _A waste?_

Her ears perched back against her head as she snarled under her breath. Already fed up from exhaustion and training, she forced what magoi she had through her and changed one more time. The change shattered the ice that trapped her and before Judar could stop her with any more attacks, she leaped to catch him in midair. Claws extended, she met the magi's borg. The two quickly tumbled down onto the ground. Kohaku used her magoi to coat her claws before slashing the barrier across, effectively shattering it. But instead of slashing him next, she bopped at his forehead with her fist.

Confused by the action, Judar stared back. She smiled and stood to give him some space to sit up. Taking a deep breath, she exhaled and let her djinn equip vanish for good. Kohaku laughed a little, her laughter somewhat throaty.

 _"I win."_

Judar's confusion left him and he scoffed. "Like hell you did." Getting up, he leaped into the air and floated there while twirling the tiny wand in his hand. "I caught you first anyway, so I won."

"Why are you talking to yourself?" Kouen asked coming up to stand between the two.

"I'm talking to _Taozi_ , Entei. Can't you hear?" he called somewhat annoyed.

Kohaku raised an eyebrow, perplexed, and finally understanding what caught Kouen off guard. She hadn't signed anything. Yet he responded to what she thought.

"No," Kouen firmly replied. "Because she's mute."

"Mute?" Judar's red irises bore onto Kohaku as she blinked just as baffled as Kouen. "I heard her."

And she wondered just how the hell that was even possible.

 _"That would be my doing, my king."_

 _Bele?_

"That's right," Judar added. He stretched lazily as he hovered a few feet away from them. "I don't understand why you've got everybody learning those stupid hand gestures when you can use Beleth just fine to talk."

Kouen glanced down at Kohaku who shook her head vehemently trying to disprove what Judar had said. _"That's not true. Beleth can't do that."_

"Of course he can!" Judar commented with a smirk. "How ya think I hear you even without knowing those damn hand signs?"

 _"He's not wrong."_ Kohaku listened as Beleth's voice rang through her head. _"But my esteemed magi, it is only because you are one of the magicians of creation that you can understand my king through me. So connected are you with djinn that my powers allow as much."_

Judar clicked his tongue and frowned before he 'stood up' and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Use him to talk to me then. Fuck if I'm learning those boring signs."

Kohaku blinked, his demeanor reminding her of the stark image from when she first met him. He'd been but a kid. Somewhat spoiled even back then, but he'd been good-natured as well. Forceful even, but she chalked it up to him not knowing any better way.

And he really hadn't changed.

* * *

Thankfully, the session ended shortly thereafter. Both prince and magi left together on their way, leaving her to herself. Exhausted as she was, Kohaku wouldn't deny that it felt great to be spent. It'd been maybe five hours in total of intense training and it'd been worth it. Not caring for food so much, she opted for a long hot bath to help her unwind. Her bath wasn't large enough for the unwinding she wanted, though, which included some light drinking so instead she headed out to the bathhouse of the palace. And she couldn't have been more delighted that no one else was in. Undressed with only a towel wrapped around and a bottle of sake in one hand, she entered.

Kohaku let herself sink in, loving how the hot water enveloped her as she sank slowly down to her shoulders. Once acclimated, she let out a long sigh of relief as her whole body relaxed.

 _Heaven._

Although most was held up, she still spotted some strands of her hair swimming along as she submerged just up to her cheeks. Blowing some bubbles for fun, she pulled back again and walked to the edge where she could sit comfortably. Leaning her arms over the edge, she looked up to the open sky. Dusk began to come, she noticed, as she watched the orange hues dominate the skies. Soon, evening would come and it'd be time to study then.

The thought alone made her mind tired. Perhaps having a part of her exhausted beyond words made it harder to want to do anything else. A smile crept to her lips, though, as she thought it thoroughly. Pouring herself a cup of liquor, she decided that, if for tonight, she'd show herself some leniency.

 _One day off won't kill me._

The taste of the peach-flavored sake made the idea that much more pleasant to her. But as she drank and the water warmed her so lovingly, her mind wondered to the news of that morning.

The mercenaries from Hakucho murdered.

Decapitated.

 _Executed._

She grabbed at her own neck, her fingers brushing against the protruding scar. Despite how much she despised the men for what they had done to her, her family, and her beloved city, she wouldn't wish such fate on anybody.

And yet someone had dealt that sentence out of their own volition. She thanked God none of her siblings were involved, even Masami. Implication would plant doubt and right now, divided as the palace was, it was the last thing she wanted for her family.

 _Still...who would even be capable enough to do it?_

That's what she couldn't fathom. Anybody could kill anybody, just like anybody could betray anybody. But only a few could get past the soldiers, locks, and traps set throughout the palace, let alone the ones in the prison cells beneath it.

Just thinking of the countless of possibilities made her head hurt. At least the liquor alleviated some of the aching but even that was small. But she wanted something to ease her mind as the bath would ease her body. As far as she knew, alcohol was the best bet for both. After almost an hour there, though, Kohaku thought it better to leave.

All the while she dressed, her mind wondered again. Sneaking past soldiers and traps, magical or other, would take precision and knowledge of the layout. But the latter was workable. One wouldn't need to know the layout if they maneuver themselves well undetected. If anything, had she theoretically done it, it would've been doable.

 _Step lightly. Make no sound. See without seeing._

With Beleth's powers, it'd be comically...easy.

The simple thought stopped Kohaku in her tracks on her way back to her room. Her hand reached out to the nearest wall to stabilize herself, the idea oddly convenient.

 _"My king."_

 _It couldn't have been...could it?_

 _"No, my king. His highness himself said so. Your brother was with the wretched woman the night of the murders. He has an alibi."_

 _Are you lying to me?_

Although she knew that neither Beleth nor Marbas would ever do such a thing, she had to ask.

 _"I would never."_

His reply calmed her but something still unsettled her greatly.

 _I need fresh air._

Maybe she was just feeling sickly from spending so much time in the bathhouse. Yes, that could very well explain it. Walking away from the wall, she stepped back towards nowhere in particular and walked. Didn't matter where just away. She busied herself with anything she could, from listening to the winter breeze bare the trees from what leaves they had left to watching the shapes the shadows took from the gaslights scattered around the dark hallways. The last thing she wanted her mind on was on the idiotic— _highly probable—_ idea.

 _It wasn't him. Beleth said so himself. It couldn't have been._

An odd mix of noises made her mind stop; as she turned about trying to locate its source, she found herself far from her room and in the East ward of the palace.

Part of her mind told her that she shouldn't be there. This was where the private quarters of the royal family and altars of the priests were. General or not, she shouldn't be around those parts uninvited. A loud smacking and fluttering, though, kept her put, wanting to find out the source of that obnoxious sound. Her feet took her where her ears told her to and followed the route towards the inner gardens. Although it was already quite dark out, the gaslight around illuminated pretty decently for her search.

As she treaded through the countless of trees, her eyes wondered around to gander. The trees were mostly leafless. The grass, although green for the most part, began to brown in some parts from the harsh cold their eastern winters brought with them. But as she stared at the floor, a brown seed rolled down from above...right from where the loud smacking noises where coming from. At tilting her head, she also caught the other sound that had been mixed in with the smacking. Fluttering, like wings. Kohaku lifted her head, her eyes widening at recognizing a very familiar young man with his long braid falling off from the branch where he sat. Walking closer to the much larger oak tree that stood around the garden, she watched as the magi ate peaches he had at hand. Carelessly, at finishing one, he tossed the seed over his shoulder where it landed near the base of the tree where Kohaku now noticed a pile.

 _"Judar."_

Glad that at least he could hear her, she smiled when Judar glanced down at hearing his name. Kohaku had to hold back a laugh from seeing the peach stuck in his mouth between his teeth as he glared down. Taking the bite, he chewed loudly—now she knew from where that annoying sound was coming from. Wiping at his mouth with forearm, Judar gave her a smug smirk before saying, "Well if it isn't the little failure."

 _"Excuse you?"_

He scoffed and finished eating the peach in his hand before tossing the core her way. Purposefully by the looks of it. She stepped to the side to avoid it and glared back up at the magi. "You heard me. Now back off, I'm eating." That said, he went back to doing so. Loudly. Mad at his dismissal, she eyed the tree. Surely it'd be fairly easy to climb but in her attire climbing the tree would be a hassle.

 _"Since when have you cared?"_ She scoffed at the comment both her djinn threw at her. Crude yet true.

Hiking the long skirts of her ruqun up and tying them haphazardly with the sash around her hips, Kohaku found her footing on the bark of the tree and began to climb. Exhilarated she went, not believing that something from her childhood would come in handy as it was doing now. As a child, she loved climbing things: trees and some roofs among the few. The latter always gave her parents and Masami heart attacks while the twins would tell her to teach them. Climbing had always been fun, and by how happy she felt at the moment, perhaps it still held a light with everything else she enjoyed. Finally reaching the top, she grabbed a hold of a sturdy branch before hoisting herself up and taking a sit.

Her breathing slightly ragged, she reached over to Judar who sat at the branch over and took one of the peaches that he had about him. He jumped briefly as Kohaku retracted her hand and turned to watch her. He grinned but she could see the slight tick on his jaw. Liking the fact that he'd been peeved, either from her audacity to ignore his request or because she stole one of his fruits, she smiled before taking a small bite from her own.

"Damn _Taozi,_ " he mumbled under his breath before turning his body towards her. "You're annoying."

Kohaku shrugged her shoulders and continued eating.

 _Looks like we have something in common._

But she flinched at remembering that she could hear her think, too. After so long, she'd gotten used to thinking that whatever was in her head stayed in her head because there was no way she'd burst out unconsciously. With Judar, though, it was like having a voice again.

And it was somewhat nice.

 _"What're you doing up here all alone?"_

"Fucking bored of the old priests nagging every five seconds." He took another peach and dug in making Kohaku cringe from the obnoxious sound he made as he ate. "They're stupid and won't let me do what I want."

Is that so. Kohaku took another bite and swallowed before speaking. _"So you ran off to hide. Here. Where they'll most likely find you."_

At having been pointed out the obvious, Judar glared back at her. "Shut up, _Taozi,"_ he called and chugged the half-eaten piece of fruit her way. Hearing it in time to dodge, she glared back at him before throwing her own in reflex. It struck him but sadly his borg activated itself to protect him. The fruit harmlessly fell down before the shield disappeared and the boy's grin grew. "Try harder. But knowing you, you'll fall short just like you're doing with Marbas. Fucking pity, you are."

 _Oh, that's it._

Quickly taking peaches from him, she began throwing them at him. Although they resulted in the same outcome as before, she threw as many as she could. Judar, not one to sit still, began doing the same. Soon the two, sitting only feet away, were throwing fruit after fruit against each other. Some tagged Kohaku on her body, but she got some good shots in. Despite that, she hated that the stupid borg was still up to protect him. A thing that she disliked from fighting magicians was exactly that. But seeing as she herself had a similar shield with Beleth's sound, she couldn't complain. That thing made her shots fall short every time, though, and it irked her. She'd only picked a few peaches and only a couple were left. If she wanted her shots to count she had to put that borg out of commission.

And only other magicians could break it. That and djinn equips. A smirk grew on her lips as she reached up to her hair where her feathered pen laid. Without having to call to him, she activated Beleth's weapon equip. Judar's eyes widened but a grin split through his face at the same time apparently liking where she was taking this little quarrel. She saw his hands reach under his garments for his wand a second before she sent a razor of sound out towards him. His borg caught the attack head on before he could counter it with his own magic.

"Tough shit, _Taozi!_ " he shouted as he floated above the tree where she stood with her staff in hand. "Puny attacks like those won't do."

 _"Yeah, yeah,"_ she bantered, her own smirk still showing. Twirling her staff in one hand, her other occupied with her one last peach, she jumped from her place before propelling herself upwards towards Judar. _"I'm puny with Marbas but I've mastered Beleth enough to kick your ass."_

Liking her response, Judar raised his wand up summoning purple thunder that crackled all around him. Sweeping his arm downwards, the thunder followed striking down at her. In midair it was a bit harder, but she managed to swipe her staff across, producing enough vibrations to raise a wall of sound to protect herself from the magic. As soon as the thunder struck, Kohaku didn't miss a beat. She swung down twice towards Judar, sending razors of sound his way and using the backfiring of her breaking shield to propel even more sound his way. Judar let his borg take the hit, but that'd been what she wanted. Judar's borg began to crack under the immense pressure before it shattered, shooting the magi off from the force. Following after him, Kohaku jumped through the air to reach him.

Eyes wide at seeing her feet away, he went to raise his wand but she was faster. Right arm raised, she threw at him before he had the time to stop it. The peach struck him straight in the face, splattering all over. A triumphant smile spread across her lips as she threw his fist in the air. Judar fell straight down, too distracted by the juices in his eyes, and hit the ground with his borg activating again to take the fall. Kohaku, having more leeway for patience, slowly swept her staff beneath her to temper the sound as a soft cushion. She hovered slowly down until her feet touched the ground just some feet away from Judar. The magi sat there, his wand on his lap as he rubbed at his face angrily.

Cautiously, she approached him and brought his hands away from his face. She chuckled at seeing his face red from his incessant rubbing, parts of his hair plastered whichever way they went, sticky with juice. "Fucking rot. Look what you did."

 _"You had it coming for insulting me,"_ she replied before dissolving her djinn weapon equip. Running over to the small pond in the gardens, she took an end of her sash—at least one of the clean parts—and soaked it in the water before returning to him. Judar snapped at her a couple of times but as she continued to swipe away his hands from his face, he found it easier to just not argue. Quietly, he sat there while Kohaku wiped the wet clothe around his face and hair to clean the stickiness off him as best she could. _"There. See? No harm done."_

"You're still a bitch for dirtying me," he commented. She let the insult fly, though, seeing as he pouted. Instead she went over to the tree where they'd been at and reached down at the floor where some peaches had survived. They were a little bruised but still edible. She took a couple before returning to him. Taking him by the hand, she got him to sit beside her on the floor of a nearby hall. Now that everything was calm, she handed him the peach that was less bruised with a smile. He eyed the fruit for a moment before growling and taking it. "Just because it'd be a waste to leave it."

Kohaku watched as he ate doing her best to ignore the sound of it. He really hadn't changed.

The first time they met was during her time at the palace, fairly early on their arrival. She'd been out climbing trees when she heard someone crying. Glancing down, she saw the little magi dressed, back then, in attire more fitting of Kou. The little boy—maybe around seven—was crying and pouting because the priests wouldn't let him do what he wanted which, to the little pampered wizard of creation, was eating delicious things. Wanting him to calm down, she offered him from the bounty of peaches she'd been picking and ate with him so that he could calm down. Once he did, he introduced himself and what he was. That had been the first time she'd ever heard of magis or magicians in general.

It'd been back then that he'd given her the nickname he seemed to remember even now: _Taozi._ The fruit she'd given him. And despite how rudely he ordered her to eat peaches with him again, she agreed. He'd appeared so lonely back then that she couldn't deny him. Perhaps that pampering was what had turned him somewhat rotten now but she didn't regret it. The lonely little boy that had likened her to a sweet fruit needed some company.

Kohaku placed aside the small core of the fruit as she finished it and turned to Judar again as he ate his. Surprised, she found herself thinking the same thing as she had almost a decade ago.

 _He seems just as lonely now as back then._

 _"You're amazing, Judar."_

The odd comment made him turn with the peach half-eaten in his mouth. He took the bite before a smug smirk came over his face. "What'd you expect? I'm a magi. Of course I'm going to be great."

 _"Yeah, I suppose,"_ she added with a nod. _"But you've come a long way from that little boy who cried because they wouldn't let him eat sweet things."_

At the reminder, Judar began to choke on a piece of fruit. Kohaku chuckled harder as she patted his back. The magi glared back with a tick on his jaw before answering, "You're very preachy for a mute girl."

That again.

 _"A lot of you seem to think so, yes."_ But instead of taking it the wrong way, Kohaku smiled. _"But I can't help myself. It's nice to not have to sign to converse with someone else. It's almost like I have a voice again. And it's because you're you that I can do this. So, in a way, I suppose I have to thank you, Judar. You are pretty amazing."_

He blinked owlishly at her before turning back to his peach. "You got that right, at least."

Kohaku stared up at the sky, letting him eat in peace. She hated seeing people like him— the lonely ones. They may be strong and well off but loneliness was something that anybody could suffer from and nobody could face it alone. Suffering alone was the worst. She would know. But if one can bear that with others, it becomes less heavy. In a way, it becomes easier to breath.

Reaching out to pat his head, Kohaku smiled when he turned to her confused. It was absurd that she would be comforting one of the powerful magicians of creation. But that would be acknowledging a part of him; he might be a magi but he was also a young man. And just like Sou and Sui, he didn't belong in war or in the hands of the organization. And yet things just were. All she could do was try to lessen that burden. All she could hope to do was make it easier for them to breath.

"You're weird..." he mumbled, pulling her hand away from him.

 _"Yes, I'm often told that too_ ," she agreed, smiling. If they saw it as being preachy, obnoxious, or weird, it was fine. So far as she could do something for them.

Out of the blue, the calm fluttering of wings became loud and piercing. It sounded like crackling and it began to hurt her ears. But just as soon as it came, it calmed down, letting a much more frightening voice take over.

"My, what a lovely sight." Kohaku and Judar both lifted their gazes to find the empress, Gyokuen, in their midst. She wasn't alone, either, as a couple of priests followed behind her. Her cold stare came down to them as they sat somewhat in her way. And although smiling, Kohaku felt nothing caring about it. It was just as fake as her tears had been in the funeral. "How pleasant to have you back in the palace, my girl. I never got to say that to either you or your siblings."

Out of respect, Kohaku scrambled to her feet and bowed. At doing so, she noticed that her attire, besides being inappropriate for having gone out, was completely smeared in fruit juices and dirt. Her cheeks dusted slightly from the embarrassment, she swallowed it down and stood her ground. Letting herself be vulnerable wouldn't win her anything. Strength under pressure was what she did best. This wouldn't be an exception. Coming up from her bow, Kohaku smiled warmly while standing straight before signing their way. _"Your Imperial Majesty, what an unexpected pleasure it is to meet you here. I hope you are having a wonderful night."_

"Yes, I am." Gyokuen chuckled daintily and covered her mouth with her sleeve. "But no need to be so tense before me. After all, your father and the first emperor were well acquainted. As such, I do hope you remember that your father and mother were great friends and allies of both him and myself."

 _"Of course. Regardless, I am only their child. I do not deem myself worthy to be so lenient where your Majesty is concerned."_

"If that is how you see it, I won't argue," she replied. "But I am glad that you and your siblings have returned to the palace after so long. It would be a lie to say you were not missed."

 _"Likewise,"_ Kohaku added.

It's then that Gyokuen turned to Judar with a smile. "Judar, you snuck out again."

Turning to him over her shoulder, Kohaku watched as Judar, who'd been sitting down all this time, finally stood up. "The priests were being a nuisance."

"But you must listen, my boy," Gyokuen reminded him. "It's for your own good."

Kohaku heard the distinct clicking of the boy's tongue but was surprised to see him grin back at her, "If you say so."

Before she had time to react, Kohaku heard Gyokuen's soft steps as she came to her. The empress stood before her and although Kohaku was a few inches taller, the petite woman still held an air of dominance. In the end, she chalked it up to sovereignty and how it changed her but another part of her felt that this was something she'd had for a long time. The way she held herself told as much. The older woman reached out her hands and cupped Kohaku's face to bring it down for their eyes to meet—pale blues meeting a pair of a starker hue.

"What beautiful eyes you have," she commented, a sickly sweet smile on her face—one that reminded her too much of Masami. "Much brighter than the rest of your siblings, to my recollection. Bright like a blue sky. Tell me, my girl, wherever did you get these from?"

Kohaku's breath hitched ever so slightly but she recovered herself quickly. Faking a smile, she nodded. _"My mother always said that I reminded her a lot of our late grandmother. That I resembled her very much."_

"I see," she said with a sigh before letting her go. "I'm glad to see they remain so untainted for a war-prone woman such as yourself. Thank you for your services. I am sure you make your family proud. They sure are working hard for you four to remain here, after all. Regardless of their brazen approach." Kohaku was confused at her words but bowed down deeming it necessary before standing. Gyokuen then turned to Judar and reached her hand out to him. "Now come, Judar. Return with us. There are still matters to attend to and I would appreciate your company." Judar sighed but walked up to her. Putting her arm around his, she smiled to Kohaku. "Well, I bid you goodnight, my girl."

Kohaku reciprocated the gesture and bid them all goodnight. As she watched them walk away, she followed only Judar's frame. He seemed just as fake as Gyokuen did, if not more. Perhaps among many is where he felt most alone. So instead of letting him leave in the quiet, she asked Beleth to deliver one last message.

 _"Let's eat peaches together some other time, Judar. Okay?"_

She couldn't be certain if he heard her but he had turned his head slightly over his shoulder. That was enough to convince her he had.

* * *

 _The idea was ludicrous. So ludicrous, in fact, that it could work._

 _"It's really..."_

 _"Pretty, isn't?"_

 _Kohaku's vassal glanced over her shoulder to look at Kohaku's beaming face. She seemed so proud of her idea but the girl had her doubts. Her vassal pursed her lips and stared at herself in the mirror that the two stood in front of. Despite having done this plenty of times before, they never attempted to deceit so many. It was fine when Kohaku convinced her vassal to do this so that they could skip her lessons and run around town together as mere servants. But this—perhaps Kohaku had grown to be too daring after three years._

 _"I don't know if 'pretty' is the word I'd use."_

 _"Of course you are!"_

 _Kohaku came to stand beside her and joined in the gazing of their reflections. Kohaku wore the simply gray clothes of a servant while her friend wore the elegant robes from one of Kohaku's dresses. Despite being apart by two years—one at eleven and the other at nine—their bodies appeared no different. Actually, nothing much told the two apart. If anyone were to look at them, they would appear as each other and no one would be the wiser. Except...maybe their eyes. Their eyes were a slight hue different, ones brighter than the others. But Kohaku assured her only someone who looked very hard to find that difference would be able to tell._

 _According to her, none would bother. Only the two of them would know._

 _"Oh wait!" Kohaku cried and ran over to get something from the bed where they had laid the clothes previously. Clutching it in her hands, Kohaku came over and neatly placed the silver carnation hairpin into the small bun that they'd fixed onto her vassal. "There. Now you're perfect."_

 _"I'm not very sure about this, Haku." Her vassal wrung her fingers anxiously._

 _"You want to see him, don't you?" she asked fervently._

 _Her vassal's eyes widened before she nodded. More than anything and if only to say goodbye. "I just want to see him before he leaves again."_

 _"Then tonight's party is perfect," Kohaku assured her. "You'll go in, waltz around, find him, and pull him away to say—"_

 _"Goodbye."_

 _"No, not goodbye." Kohaku's vassal turned to her as she smiled warmly. That smile, more than anything, reassured her. "You'll tell him that you'll wait for him to come back. It won't be goodbye. Goodbyes are too sad. So just say 'I'll see you when you come back.'"_

 _"He will come back...won't he?" the vassal asked, nervously._

 _"I'm sure of it." A couple of knocks came to the door. Anxiously, the two girls took their positions feigning as each other. If only for the night. The vassal called out for whomever had knocked to enter and before long Kohaku's older sister, Masami, came in. "Oh, Kohaku, you look gorgeous."_

 _"T-Thank you."_

 _Masami, too busy thinking about the farewell party happening for their father and his troops before they went out came up to her and grabbed her hand. "Come along now, father and mother are waiting already. Let's not keep them any longer."_

 _She nodded and was dragged along. She glanced back a bit nervous but only caught sight of Kohaku. Kohaku smiled and ushered her forward with conviction. The girl returned the smile and took a deep breath._

 _It wouldn't be goodbye. Just a simple 'see you when you return.' That will be all. And then all this will be over._

* * *

Startled awake, Kohaku jerked to a sit in her bed. Her breathing hoarse and heavy, she sat fully up, feeling the cold sweat running down her whole body and making parts of her clothes cling as well. That dream—it'd been years since she last had it. Or any related to _her_. Still shaken and seeking comfort, her hands scrambled under her pillow but found nothing. She flew into a panic until she remembered that her journal along with the carnation hairpin were in Seijin's hands. Safe.

But she didn't want them safe. Not now. She wanted them with her. Not caring for the time of the night or her own attire, she dashed out of the room and towards the servants' quarters. Although a fair distance, it shortened in her desperate sprint to have her things close. Sneaking herself in, she came to Seijin's small room. He hadn't much but looking around, she found the floorboard he'd shown her the first time she asked him to hide her things. Moving it aside to open it, she quietly pulled out her journal and made sure that the hairpin was in-between the pages.

Heaving a sigh at having them close to her once more, she put the board back in place before leaving as quietly as she came. She would tell Seijin about it later. For now, she needed them close. Returning to her room, she went over to the farther corner, between her bed and the wall and used that small alcove to safeguard herself. Relieved that everything was in place now, she sat with the journal and hairpin in her arms. Laying it down, she opened its pages towards the beginning—rummaging through loose pieces of paper, letters in between its pages.

 _I dreamed of you again tonight. I cried. It's impossible for me to not cry whenever I dream of you. It's like something compels me to do so. It must be my guilt. I wish I could talk to you—apologize to you—but I know I can't. It hurts too much to even pretend. But it also helps me in a way. But I don't know—does it hurt me more than it helps? If it does, I deserve it for what I've done._

 _I'm sorry— I'm so—_

 _It sh— me. —die—_

Blurred. The rest of the words were unreadable. Tears had smeared the ink away years ago when she first wrote them. It amazed her that even after this long those words described how she felt. Even after so long, those words perfectly described what she still felt. Kohaku closed the journal and held it close, feeling the familiar sting in her eyes. Emotions often stirred in her—anger, annoyance, regret, and glee were a few—but seldom did sadness. Nothing brought her remotely close to the same grief as _this_.

If she was going to weep, she might as well lay down. She knew from experience that once she started with this it would exhaust her just the same. With the journal in hand, she stopped just as she sat on her bed. The journal couldn't stay in her room. Not again. Bringing these back to danger's door was something she wouldn't do. But she also didn't want to return them to where Seijin was and have to go so far to reach them.

 _There has to be a better place._

And it surprised her that she didn't have to think so hard to find one. Picking herself up, she trotted to the study. She listened for a few seconds to make sure no one was inside before opening the doors herself. It was empty as she wanted it. Going off to the furthest corner of the study, she found where they kept most of their western references before kneeling down and searching for space on the bottom-most shelf. Finding a small opening at the far corner, she tucked in the hairpin before pushing the whole journal in. Sitting back, she looked at the full shelf.

 _A tree amongst a forest._

No one would be the wiser.

Happy with its new hiding spot so close to her room, she went back hoping to at least conceive some sleep.

But sleep eluded her for weeks to come.

Who would have known that a simple reminder would trigger such a cascade of nightmares? Night after night they struck like lightning, quick and forceful. And they kept leaving her in tears. In the middle of the night, she would awaken in a panic but the haven of her journal brought her solace enough to bear with it and not weep as much as she used to.

Restless nights with her morning routine wreaked havoc on her health but she knew well how to care for herself so that others wouldn't notice. She knew her body and how resilient it was. She knew her limits. The nightmares would subside with time back into the darks of her mind and then she would be able to rest. The days turned to weeks that went by uneventful; soon those weeks turned to two more months.

The dreams almost all gone by then, Kohaku could say that her life had returned to some semblance of peace. It lasted for only those short months, however. One morning before breakfast, Seijin sent word to her about being called to Masami's room along with the twins. According to him, their older sister had gotten news from home.

Kohaku hurried through the palace with Seijin behind her as she headed to Masami's room. She threw the doors open to see that the twins were already there, Masami patiently sitting and holding the unopened envelope in her hands.

 _"What word comes from home?"_

"If you would settle down," Masami replies, motioning to the chairs surrounding her. The twins take her suggestion but Kohaku opted to stand idly behind them. "That shall suffice, I suppose."

She carefully opened the letter and read it quietly to herself. Kohaku watched closely as Masami's eyes scanned the paper; she saw her eyes widen for a split second before they returned to her usual composure.

"So?" Sousei asked, impatient.

"It's a letter from mother." She reads over it again before turning to them with a smile. "Father's health is getting better." A collective sigh sprung throughout the room. Those were indeed good news.

"That's great..." Sousei said with a grin as he sank back in his chair, relaxed. Kohaku reached her hand to his shoulder and squeezed it, reassuringly.

"Anything else?" Suisei said with a perk to her voice.

"Yes," Masami said. "It appears that father and mother have been exchanging correspondence with the Eastern Isles."

"Mother's homeland?" Sousei asked to ascertain himself. Masami nodded in response.

Kohaku couldn't fathom why they would reach to them. Despite being their mother's homeland, the Eastern Isles stood aside any national power. A band of islands strewn closely together, they were far enough from any large nation that none could influence them directly. Kou couldn't because any attempt to reach them via the ocean would be quickly shut down. The Reim Empire that sat to the other side of the Isles couldn't for the same reason. Even the Kina Kingdom rarely wagered a visit to them. Then again being part of the Seven Seas Alliance didn't leave them room to invade such small yet forceful people. Their purpose wasn't to conquer, just to live and be left to peacefully exist.

The only way outsiders or islanders could come and go was via the trading route they held with the aforementioned nations. It was a small route but because of its rich resources, it flourished even years after its establishment. Father had been a conniving man and knew that if he couldn't reach the place from the outside then he would do so from the inside. Kohaku questioned at times if their marriage had actually been out of love or out of merit. Regardless, none of them could possibly think of anything that the Eastern Isles had for their parents to be speaking to them.

 _"What for?"_

"Treaty. Between them and...the Kou Empire."

 _That's absurd._

"The island chiefs won't accept it," Sousei burst out. "There's no need—"

"There is now, apparently." Masami read over that certain part again before turning back to them. "The Eastern Isles' resources have started to noticeably dwindle. It's not unexpected if you think about. A single land's resourcefulness can only last for so long."

 _"Did they specify the terms?"_

"No," Masami said, shaking her head. "Only that the pact had been made with the Empress' and First Prince's consent."

Kohaku's brow furrowed at hearing mention of Kouen. Why would they need permission from him when this concerned more the state than military?

"Father wouldn't just give over something like that," Suisei called out with a puff of her cheeks. "He's not an idiot."

"Sui's right," Sousei agreed. "What did he gain in exchange for handing over the Eastern Isles?"

"A marriage...between the First Prince and myself."

Kohaku froze.

 _What...?_

"M-Marriage?!" Suisei blurted completely taken aback. Her chair was tilted so far back that she would have fallen had she not recovered so quickly. "B-But Sami-nee is part of the Southern army with us!"

"She won't always be, though," Sousei clarified a tad bit calmer. "Once father fully recovers, he will take over Kohaku's and Masami's positions. I'll...join him as his second-in-command and all of you three will return home."

 _We'll be put back to our original duties._

Daughters of a general due to marry. And their father had already given away Masami in exchange for a better position for the Reizei Family.

Suddenly, Gyokuen's words from months ago made since. A brazen approach for the four of them to remain in the palace...as part of the royal family.

 _Goodness._

Their father had laid out the board and new every move possible. He caged in any other player so they would take the moves _he_ wanted them to take. Did he really outwit both the Empress and Kouen? She couldn't believe it, much less where Kouen was concerned. Despite only being three months, the time she'd spent with him told her plenty. Intelligent eyes refusing to give and the stance of a conscientious man despite his impassiveness. She highly doubted he fell blindly to one of her father's plans.

 _No. If he's agreed to this, then it truly was under his own volition._

That didn't lessen the slight bitterness she felt. What she hated most was that she didn't know where it came from.

"Mother wrote in father's stead what we're to do now as well." Masami continued verbatim the letter from there.

Masami's marriage would be taken care of by them and the Empress. Because of the timing, the ceremony would have to be delayed. Masami stopped briefly in her translation before continuing. "And Kohaku—father's reconsidering the declination of your position as his second-in-command."

That struck her just as hard as the news of the marriage.

 _"But why? I openly declined that position."_

Masami frowned but sighed. "Father's reconsideration was persuaded, apparently, by his highness, the First Prince."

What? That's—

 _...why?_

Sousei and Suisei didn't disagree with it, however. They were more than pleased. Almost too much. Kohaku turned to them both with a frown. _"What have you two done?"_

"Spoke to Prince Kouen," Suisei answered with a smirk.

"Convinced him that you had what it took to lead alongside father, " Sousei added with a shrug of his shoulders. "It worked. We got you a second chance to prove yourself, to him this time. If he approves of you, nothing else will coerce your decision. Not if the prince himself recommends you. And this time, you won't throw the opportunity you wanted away."

"It wasn't something for you to meddle in."

The twins turn to Masami then and together answer her. "Haku-nee deserves it."

Kohaku couldn't have been more pleased. At least one little thing went well.

"Regardless of what you accomplished," Masami reproached, "nothing will change."

Masami turned her way and she saw in her eyes a punishment to come. She didn't like what the twins did at all. Masami stood, placing the letter away before the twins stood and the four of them stood together. "Once father has fully recovered, he will take his position back. And when Sousei's ready, he will replace Kohaku as father's second-in-command. After that, all will go back to how it should be."

* * *

That meeting left a bittersweet taste on Kohaku's mouth. On one hand, she was happy. Once their father returned to take over the Southern Subjugation Army, she could stand beside him. All she had to do was prove to Kouen she was capable of such position. She would still be able to fight for the country that she loved. She would be able to protect the people that couldn't protect themselves. She would aid those that strived to make their world a better place.

Then there stood the other hand—Masami's marriage to Kouen. That left the bitter taste in her, one that seemed to overwhelmed the sweetness of the moment. She knew Masami like she knew her own mind. And she knew for a fact that Kouen didn't deserve such a double-faced person. Sure, Masami could be sweet and extremely caring of those she loved but she hated just as strongly those who've done her wrong. Kohaku's case would be very well an example of such. She doubted that someone like Masami was suitable for him.

 _Why are you even thinking about this?_

Shaking it off of her, Kohaku took a deep breath. That's right. It didn't concern her. If anything, she should be happy about their union. This meant that now she and her siblings would belong to one of the three most powerful global powers of the world. Once done with, the marriage would secure their place in the world.

 _Then why...does it sting me so much?_

Not wanting to think about it, Kohaku sought out a way to push it aside. Having no stomach for breakfast, she excused herself after their brief meeting and had been wandering around the palace aimlessly. When her mind swam with thoughts or problems, her body tended to go on its own. This time it brought her back to the West Wing and towards the barracks.

It was rather empty, however, being so early in the morning. So it amazed her to hear the _clank_ of metal against wood from afar. Someone must be training by themselves. It surely didn't sound like a spar between two people. The closer she got, the easier it got to discern at least that much. She could only hear the movements of a single body along with their deep, controlled breathing. Coming up to the outside of the training grounds, she watched the Fourth Prince from afar as he spun around with his polearm at hand.

 _Hakuryuu._

It'd been quite a while since she'd seen him. Ever since the fiasco with the mercenaries, she hadn't met with him. It wasn't that she hadn't tried, either. The sparse amount of time she had between her training and studies she invested in spending time with those she previously lost connections with. Kougyoku and Kouha were a prominent example. Recently, Koumei had been added to that equation as well. She found it easier to apply what she learned with an actual strategist looking over her shoulder. Funny enough, Judar had also been added to the roster. Although few, they would eat together or simply play, roughly but still. She would admit time spent with Judar was never bland. The times she spent with Hakuei were few, too, but very fruitful. She enjoyed spending time with someone she actually saw as a proper older sister figure.

As for Kouen, well, she spent enough time with him during training and then at times during studying. She'd grown more accustomed to his presence and that meant being less proper when they were together. In a way, it felt like they were kids again.

But Hakuryuu? She'd neglected him for far too long. It was time to attend to broken ties.

Steady and mind made up, Kohaku ambled his way. At spotting her as she approached, Hakuryuu stopped and turned, breath ragged and sweat beading down from his forehead.

"General Kohaku." He quickly twirled his polearm to rest beside him and bowed before her. Raising her hands to bring him up again, she did a few of her charades to communicate. This time, however, he stopped her. "T-There's no need, General. I've taken the liberty to learn your language."

 _Really?_

 _"That's...quite a task you've put onto yourself, my prince."_

"Not at all," he said with a small smile. "It was interesting to learn, as a matter of a fact. But I digress. Where you in need of something?"

That's right. Making her way to the stand where more polearms rested, she picked one that more or less matched her staff's height. Taking it and twirling it a few times to test it, she returned and took a stance with the polearm against her left arm and her right free.

 _"Let's spar."_

"I don't think that would be appr—" his sentence ended when he saw the peeved frown on her face.

Kohaku smacked the blade against the ground, making a high screech to emphasize her decision. _"It's much more boring to train by yourself, don't you think so?"_ Sporting a smile once more, she didn't give him time to reply on that front. She sprinted forward almost catching Hakuryuu off guard. The young prince was quick enough to lift his polearm and block her attack. She didn't stop there, though, and kept going at him; with each twirl she gave of her weapon, he was sure to see it and block. But that's all he was doing.

 _Come on, dragonet. You can do better than that._

She knew of one attack with a spear that'd force him to attack or take it. Grabbing the polearm firmly with both her hands, she took a step back and held it at her side before swiping horizontally at him. Hakuryuu stepped back at the simple attack but when he did, Kohaku thrusted hers diagonally. But as it came Hakuryuu recognized the move. The attack tested the opponent's resilience. If dodged, it would only hurt him anyway he went. He had to take it head on. Coating the tip of his blade with magoi, he remained in place and attacked with the same move.

Kohaku grinned at his figuring it out but seemed perplexed at the strange hue of his blade. Her doubt turned to shock the moment Hakuryuu's blade sliced cleanly through her own, the momentum not stopping there. Seeing no other way, she sidestepped, the blade still catching part of her hair and sleeve. Hakuryuu went forward with his attack and sliced at the ground, the blade coated in magoi piercing through the ground.

Hakuryuu abruptly rose with a shocked expression on his face. "G-General, are you all right?"

Kohaku grinned while brushing her fingers through her hair, startled when she saw some caramel strands fall. Hakuryuu panicked and rushed to her side as she picked at her torn sleeve.

"My deepest apologies," he immediately began. "It wasn't my intention."

 _"Don't worry about it."_ Hey eyes wandered to the blade still somewhat covered in magoi. _"Is that magoi manipulation?"_

"Oh," he quipped. Quickly, he undid the coat on the blade. "Yes, it is. I didn't mean to use it. But I knew no other way to stop your attack." Kohaku then watched with curiosity as his concern changed to perplex. "If I may, General—"

 _"Kohaku is fine."_ When his brow furrowed even further, she clarified it for him. _"I find it quite easier than calling positions."_

"Likewise," he replied before continuing. "Where did you learn that technique?"

She held her tongue for a second. Would telling him do any good?

 _He asked out of good nature. All he wants is to know._

And there was no harm to that.

 _"Yours brothers taught me. Both Hakuren and Hakuyuu."_

He lifted his gaze at seeing her sign their names. "My brothers?"

Kohaku nodded and took him away to sit down before continuing. _"They taught me a lot when I was smaller. It's from them that I learned how to fight well with a staff, and what urged me to learn even after they were gone."_

Hakuryuu remained quiet. It lasted a little too long and she thought she'd spoken too much until he spoke again. "Do you remember them well?"

Kohaku took in the question, weighing her reply. _"I do. They were wonderful people. I remember the times we spent together, happy, back then. I also recall how happy Hakuei and you were back then too, dragonet."_

His mood dampened somewhat at her mentioning Hakuei. That's right. From what Hakuei told her, she and Hakuryuu where still at bitter odds.

It saddened her to see them like that. Of the few beliefs she held close, family was a big part of them. The world could leave and abandoned her but so long as Sousei and Suisei were with her, she could bear a world of pain. And she did.

She didn't wish that on him.

 _"You shouldn't be at such odds with Hakuei, Hakuryuu."_

He lifted his gaze but at meeting her stark blue eyes, he averted his own. "Pardon my saying but that's not any concern of yours."

 _True. But if people keep calling me preachy and talkative for a mute girl, then I have a reputation to uphold._

 _"Perhaps not. But just because it doesn't concern me doesn't mean it doesn't matter."_ That confused him but when he didn't interrupt her any further, she continued. _"It's been quite obvious, at least to me, the toll your mother taking over as interim emperor has taken from you and your sister. I may not understand your struggle but I understand how much it hurts to be at odds with a sibling."_

Kohaku raised her hands, ready to continue, but stopped briefly. For the first time since she got there, she thought about what to say and didn't simply blurt it out. After choosing what she deemed to be the proper words, she raised her hands once more.

 _"It's like fighting a ghost. You can't touch it or hurt it but you feel the pain that being beside it brings you. Those feelings linger and burden the soul. They're hard to carry and seldom are they forgiving."_

Hakuryuu lifted his gaze to look at her for a second. In that split second, though, she saw a part of his defenses fall as his eyes became slightly gentler. "It's hard. She doesn't believe what I've told her. Even though it's for the best."

Kohaku reached out to touch his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. _"Perhaps it's not what you want but surely it's what needs to be done. Understand that much, Hakuryuu. Whatever your sister does, she will always do it with your wellbeing in mind."_

He didn't answer. Instead, he gathered his polearm and hers as well before standing back up. "I will think about what you said." Taking both weapons in one hand and offering the other to her, he smiled. "If it's all right with you, may we continue?" A smile growing on her own lips, Kohaku accepted his offer.

So young and yet so lost. It was sad, really. But she couldn't say she was any better. In the end, she decided to accompany him in his reclusion and spar a bit with him. They spend most of the morning on and off until lunch which they spend together talking. To her surprise, Hakuryuu was much more talkative than she gave him credit for. Not only that but he was an amazing cook. Over lunch, he'd prepared a light and simple menu which she couldn't help but fawn over. Everything was delicious.

But after lunch, he left her saying that he had things to attend to. Before dismissing him, she asked to spend time together again. It'd been nice. Hakuryuu smiled at that suggestion.

"I would like that, yes."

Kohaku left after seeing him leave but as she rounded the corner just outside the small parlor, she met with a pair of pale blue eyes.

 _"Princess?"_

"Kohaku. Hello," she said quietly. Standing before Kohaku, Hakuei fidgeted about, her gaze askance as if trying to figure out what to say.

But just by staring at her it was easy to tell what bothered her. Perhaps calling it her 'sisterly intuition' wouldn't be far off. _"Hakuryuu is doing well. A bit downtrodden but otherwise well, Hakuei."_

Hakuei blinked a couple of times before sighing and smiling. "Thank you…and I'm sorry. I didn't mean to intrude."

 _"You didn't. Besides, I caught sight of you when we were in the kitchen."_ Kohaku walks over to her side before inviting her to walk along with her. _"You care, it shows. But perhaps your sneaking around needs some work. Your footsteps are just a tad bit loud."_

Bringing her dainty hand up to her lips and letting out an airy chuckle, Hakuei couldn't resist herself from laughing. Once over, she smiled and this time it looked a bit more relaxed. "I'll take that to heart, Kohaku. But besides that, I have to thank you."

She raised an eyebrow at that odd show of gratitude. _"For what?"_

"For being there for him when I can't be," Hakuei replied. "And it'd be wonderful if you could continue to do so. At least...for the time being of this quarrel."

Kohaku gave her a grim smile and nodded. _"I'll support him, whether or not you ask it of me, Hakuei. We spent enough days together for me to care about him. I think of Hakuryuu as a little brother and as such I will always do my best to protect him."_

 _I don't wish for anything bad to happen to him, after all._

Hakuei couldn't keep from smiling. "Thank you, Kohaku."

* * *

Despite Hakuei's company for the afternoon, they went their separate ways early into the evening. Kohaku had wandered here and there wanting to avoid nothing and everything. The news from that morning still stuck to her and were hitting hard each time she remembered them. What she couldn't pin was why they even did.

 _I don't give a damn who Masami marries._

In fact, if the world were even the slightest bit fair, Masami would end up with just the right person she deserved for all she'd done. But Kohaku highly doubted that. The world was anything but fair.

 _And I'm living proof of that fact._

Her spirits and energy completed depleted for the day, she thought the best thing to do would be to rest. Surely some sleep would make her feel better. And if she skipped dinner she would have even more time to rest. Yeah, that definitely sounded like a good plan to her.

The evening light started to crawl over the sky and changing it to a darker hue when she started on her way to her room. On her way, though, she saw a familiar, short figure approaching her from the other end of the hallway.

"Oh, Haku!" Kouha exclaimed with wide eyes. Kohaku couldn't keep from raising an eyebrow, perplexed at the fabrics that he held in his arms.

 _"Hey, Kouha. What are you up to with those?"_

"These?" he asked, raising them and letting the gaslight hit them. The fabrics glimmered beautifully under the faint light and caught Kohaku's eye. "Their Kougyoku's. I'm supposed to get her ready for dinner with Mei-nii and En-nii and she wanted to wear something nicer than what she normally does."

En-nii... Her stomach turned at hearing that name.

 _"That sounds fun. Hope you four have a nice time—"_

Kouha struggled holding the bundles of fabric in front of her. Seeing this, her conscious wouldn't just let her go without helping him.

 _Just help him take the stuff to Kougyoku's room and go to your own. Rest up._

 _"Here."_ Before he could protest, she grabbed some of the pieces and neatly folded them in her arms before smiling. He thanked her and led the way back to Kougyoku's room.

Pushing the doors open, he loudly announced their arrival. "Come help us, Kougyoku!"

The young princess turned to them, at first a bit annoyed but it all disappeared when she saw Kohaku behind Kouha. "Anegimi!" she exclaimed and sprinted to them with a gleeful smile. Taking the clothes from Kohaku, Kougyoku set them aside before going to embrace her. "It's been long since I last saw you. You seemed so busy that I didn't want to bother you."

"We saw her last week." Kouha tried calling over the pile he carried. His stature didn't let him maneuver over the clothes and when he kept trying only to fail, he exploded in annoyance. "Help me too, Kougyoku!"

"Oh. I'm sorry, Kouha," she replied with a wry smile as the two women helped him with the rest of the clothes.

Seeing everything ready for them, Kohaku pointed to the door. _"If that's all you needed then I'll—"_

Kougyoku's eyes widened a bit before her little puppy eyes came over her face. "You're leaving already?"

At hearing this, Kouha immediately perked up from where he stood over the clothes. "What?"

"She's leaving, Kouha," his sister announced sadly. Kohaku kept inching towards the door in a weak attempt to reach it before he could do anything about it.

"Oh no, you don't!" he exclaimed and jumped over the clothes to tackle her down. Straddling her, Kouha grinned mischievously before speaking. "You won't be going anywhere."

In the end, half-threatened and half-guilt, Kohaku remained with the two younger Ren siblings as they squabbled about what to wear for their family dinner. All the while they went about searching for what'd be best for Kougyoku to wear, the young princess explained it to her.

"Kouen oni-sama and Koumei oni-sama are always so busy. Luckily, they tend to leave sometime for us when they can." Kougyoku smiled warmly and held one of her favorites close to herself. "It's one of the few things we get to do as a family and it's something I enjoy."

"Yeah but since most of our other sisters are married the numbers have mostly dwindled to us," Kouha explained all the while searching for a good pair for Kougyoku's ruqun. From time to time, he would place two up against Kougyoku for contrast before setting them aside into different piles. Kohaku surmised that each meant he either approved or disapproved of them for the occasion. "Tonight is supposed to be us four only since Kourin has _other_ things to do."

"Don't be like that, Kouha," Kougyoku reminds. By the looks of it, however, Kohaku could tell that perhaps she agreed with Kouha's disdain. "Surely Kourin one-sama does have something important to do."

Kouha scoffed as he continued to dig. "Whatever. She's dissing En-nii and Mei-nii when they're giving up precious time to spend with us. That's a sorry move in my books." His attitude changed when he spotted a couple of clothes that he liked. Taking them and lifting them up against Kougyoku, he frowned. "Damn it, Kougyoku. You match with nothing but pinks and reds."

"Golds too!" Kougyoku added with a puff of her cheeks.

Kohaku couldn't help but laugh at their small bickering. They surely seemed tight knit like her own siblings. But unlike the twins, these two held a different kind of chemistry. It wasn't peaceful but rather rambunctious instead. Nonetheless, it appeared formidable.

At hearing her, Kouha turned her way making her stiffen a bit. His pink eyes wandered down to the garments he still held in his hands. Picking them up to place against Kohaku, he smiled. "Haku's color is definitely blue and silver, though."

 _What?_

"They do look beautiful with her eyes, don't they?" Kougyoku asked as she stared at her too.

 _"No, it doesn't."_ She turned to Kouha then to plead when Kougyoku didn't seem to budge. _"Shouldn't you be dressing her instead?"_

"Yeah, but hers are rather simple to find since she doesn't match with anything outside her pallor." Kouha took advantage of Kohaku's confusion to decide to himself. "All right, you're wearing these then."

 _"Excuse me?"_

Kouha grinned smugly before taking the two garments and setting them aside atop Kougyoku's bed. "Join us for dinner."

 _"I couldn't—"_

But they spoke faster and louder than she could sign. "That's a splendid idea!" Kougyoku burst out, her eyes gleaming with happiness. Turning to Kohaku and laying her eyes on her, she could almost swear that they glimmered. "Won't you, anegimi?"

The more the two got into the idea, the harder it seemed to be to convince them otherwise. So instead she went for the logical path instead of arguing with them any other way. _"It's for your family, though, isn't it? I wouldn't want to intrude on that."_

"Doubt they'll mind." Kouha's words only seemed to light the fire in Kougyoku's mind further. She really liked the idea. "Besides, what's so bad about having dinner with us? Unless...ah—" he gasped, feigning shock despite the glint of a grin pulling at his lips. "You don't _want_ to have dinner with us."

 _This little twerp._

But Kohaku didn't have time to strangle him for saying those words. Immediately, Kougyoku reacted and her puppy eyes returned, this time with a glint of sadness in them. "You don't want to have dinner with us?"

Kohaku gaped her mouth like a fish, her hands fidgeting like crazy not knowing what to do. Her eyes came to Kouha then to Kougyoku and seeing the mismatch of mischief and letdown on each made her indecisive. She didn't want Kouha getting away with pinning her against a wall like that but she didn't want to disappointment Kougyoku either.

 _But I can't say no to her._

Well, damn her conscious.

 _"No, I—I'll accompany you to dinner if that's what you want."_

The two burst out in glee from winning. And although she wasn't at all happy about being tricked like that, she did enjoy that her mere company brought them such joy. Their sincerity was appreciated.

So if enduring a few hours of dinner with them was what she needed to do to keep them that way, then she would go. She'd suffered through worse, anyway. Dinner wouldn't be that bad.

What she hadn't counted on was on Kouha's meticulous hand.

"Stand still, will you?" he reproached for the tenth time. Kohaku grimaced but knew it best to listen.

From her own mirror, Kougyoku stopped applying her make-up and leaned back to see what Kouha was doing. "It's coming out really pretty, Kouha."

"Yeah," he admitted, wiping off a mistake he'd made around her eye. "But if she keeps moving, I won't get done in time."

 _"I didn't ask for you to put make-up on me."_ After having dressed her, Kouha wanted to apply some to go with it. And despite her refutes, he didn't leave any room for her to decline. So in the end, he won the battle.

"If I don't, you'll look plain with the robes you have on now." Kouha finished with her eyes and gently blew away some dust from her face. "Don't move. I just need to put something on your lips." Kohaku let her neck rest for a bit from all the pushing back he'd done and turned behind her at hearing Kouha's exclaim. "Ah, Kougyoku. I've told you before not to put on so much."

"It's not much!" she countered. Instinctively, Kougyoku turned back to the mirror and pouted as she touched her powdered cheek. "It's not."

 _"You look beautiful, Kougyoku,"_ Kohaku signed, using the mirror to let her see.

Kougyoku smiled warmly before she turned to Kouha with a triumphant grin. "See? Anegimi says I look pretty."

The young prince then scoffed at hearing this. "Yeah, pretty painted. Seriously, Kougyoku, what's a woman that doesn't wear make-up gonna know about how much is and isn't enough?"

A grimace came to her at that, not knowing whether to take that as a compliment or insult. Her pride told her the latter. Nonetheless, she let it slide because, in reality, he wasn't wrong. Despite being in her early twenties, Kohaku new little about beauty and what trended. Usually for women her age, it would be a must. Yet seeing as she commanded troops of her own, make-up and the likes had to take a step down on her priority list.

Looking off onto Kougyoku's mirror as the two continued to bicker over the princess's make-up, she saw herself clearly for the first time since they started. Although not complete, she had to admit that Kouha had a hand for such things. Never in her life had anyone done such a number on her. It felt heavy on her but that was because she wasn't used to it. Besides that, however, she could tell the fine details that Kouha had struggled to do. The fine lines that followed her upper eyelashes were prominent and the slight darker blue shadow on her eyelids made her eyes light up. Her cheekbones had always been something many complimented her on but with the faint rosiness that he'd applied, she could see their appeal. Her lips, although small, were full but in contrast fell pale and bland.

Out of curiosity, Kohaku reached up to touch her face but got her hand smacked away by Kouha as he returned.

"Don't you even think of touching it." A small dish in hand, he damped something onto his index finger before turning back to her. "Let your lips fall open and don't pucker them, all right?" Following him as he seemed to know what to do, she nodded. Taking a deep breath, she let her lips fall apart on the exhale. Gently, Kouha rubbed at her lips with the balm. They were simple brushes and only a couple or three before he smiled and nodded. "There. All done."

Opening her eyes, Kohaku saw Kougyoku's shocked face along with Kouha's prideful gaze. All at once, she became self-conscious and it made her want to hide her face.

"Don't!" Kouha exclaimed, stumbling forward and taking her hands away from her face. "You'll mess it up."

 _"It looks weird."_

Kougyoku sprung forward at reading that, shaking her head. "You don't," she assured. "We were just...amazed."

 _"Really?"_

"Never seen you like that. What with all the training and studying you do, you don't get to enjoy being a girl," Kouha suggested while fixing his own clothes.

 _"I don't get what's to enjoy about this."_

"You get to look pretty for one." Kouha went behind her and asked her to sit by Kougyoku's dresser. Once situated, he began playing around with her hair trying to see what fit with her outfit best. Kougyoku stood to the side giving him advice while Kouha kept talking. "And guys fawn over you. Have you not seen the palace soldiers following your sister around?"

She tended to ignore her in general so no. With a shake of her head as an answer, Kouha mumbled a small reply.

"Masami one-sama _is_ beautiful and she does tend to herself quite well, too." Kougyoku gazed away to the ceiling a bit in thought. "But I've got to say, her eyes are nothing like yours, anegimi."

"Right?" Kouha called with a glance over his shoulder. "They're—I don't know—brighter maybe?"

"Definitely," Kougyoku said and came closer to her, leveling her face next to Kohaku's. From that position, she could see Kougyoku's bright magenta eyes sparkle. Surprisingly enough, her own blue eyes shone brightly unlike she'd ever seen them before.

They looked a little more...alive. It was an odd thing to think but she couldn't help it. Years of looking herself in a mirror had given her that impression. Despite their natural brightness, they lacked vibrancy. But now they had 'something' she couldn't place.

"All done," Kouha announced putting one of Kougyoku's silver hairpins on her hair. "It's simple but cute."

Kohaku looked at herself one more time. Her make-up complete with lips a slight peachy tan, her dress in perfect place thanks to Kouha, and her hair styled. He'd grabbed half to spin into a small bun at the nape of her neck, keeping it in place with a small hairpin, while the rest of her hair was let down over her shoulder. Her bangs were swept to the side with a few short strands unwilling to be put into place. It looked nice, however; she had to admit that much.

 _"Thank you, you two. It came out really beautiful."_

"You're beautiful, anegimi," Kougyoku corrected with a tight hug.

"Stop it," Kouha reproached the two with a swat of his hands to their shoulders. "You'll ruin it before dinner. Which we might be late to, by the way."

Kougyoku's shriek so close blew her eardrums away as she began to panic. "Oh no. We have to go."

The little prince grinned before standing to escort the two. "Then let's go."

Kohaku took his invitation and grabbed him by one arm while Kougyoku took the other before they exited the room. She had to admit that it was nice to spend time with them. It contrasted a lot with when she first met them.

Her encounter with Kougyoku had been out of curiosity. All she had wanted back then was to have other girls to talk to. Masami spent most of her time with Hakuei. The twins were too young and mostly played with Hakuryuu—if one could call their bullying that. Kohaku had already paid the other six Ren daughters a visit and although a few of them were around her age, none wanted to have anything to do with a general's daughter. Kougyoku was different, though. The shy six-year-old girl lived in a palace annex being the youngest of Koutoku's daughters and daughter to a prostitute. Back then she knew little of what that implicated, just that she wasn't viewed the same as the others. But in her eyes, Kougyoku was just a lonely girl wanting friends. Kohaku related much to that.

As for Kouha, that had been pure chance. She found the annex where he and his mother resided on one of her evening expeditions of the palace. And he'd attacked her by accident when she startled him. Almost impaled a knife through her palm, too. But letting bygones be bygones, she wanted to know more about the little boy and his mother. So she approached him the best way she knew how: food. Baking small goods for the two, she would often go and leave it for them. He caught her one of those times. It was after she told him that she was glad his mother liked her food that he became a tiny bit less hostile. She didn't get completely through with him but she at least got as far as staying in the same room as the two—a safe distance away—and telling them stories of anything she could think of as they ate what she'd brought for the occasion.

Sadly, before any further progress could be made with either, her family left the palace. The last time she saw them Kouha was still exiled as the son of a madwoman and Kougyoku was still alone and unable to speak above a murmur. Looking at them now, she was amazed at how much they'd grown in her absence.

It impressed her. She didn't have a clue of the hardships they went through but she knew that what they had now they deserved. They won it with their own strength and will. And that was something to admire.

They arrived at the dining hall a little later than the set time. Unfortunately—thankfully where Kohaku was concerned—neither Kouen nor Koumei where there. Kougyoku's spirits plummeted the instant she saw this, though.

"They're not here..."

Kohaku accompanied her to her seat and took a seat beside her. Kouha sighed, taking the remaining seat by her other side before shrugging his shoulders. "I had an inkling but didn't want to say anything."

That was curious. _"How come?"_

"Council meetings. Expeditions. Stuff in the near future and the like." Kouha smiled wryly at Kougyoku and patted her hand. "It's all right, though. I'm sure they'll apologize and set up another date later."

At hearing this Kougyoku smiled before nodding. "Yes, I'm sure they will." She patted daintily at the small tears on her eyes before her smile grew back. "Let's enjoy this, though. Anegimi is with us and that's something to be happy about."

The two asked for dinner to begin being served after that. Kohaku remained generally quiet only replying to whatever they asked. She found it much more relaxing to listen to their amusing conversations about trivialities. But the calm soon got interrupted when her ears caught a couple of voices entering the room.

Lifting her gaze, she blinked at seeing the twins coming into the dining hall. Both stopped utterly perplexed but quickly changed as they ran to her side. Almost tackling her out of her chair, they began speaking all at once making it rather hard to understand them. From above the noise of the four speaking, she barely caught anything.

Someone said that they were glad she was coming out to eat at normal hours. Most likely Sousei. Another that said they couldn't believe she was having dinner with the prince and princess and not them. She chalked that complain up to Suisei. Kougyoku and Kouha ended being the ones saying that it wasn't their fault that she liked them better.

Hearing that, Kohaku finally saw fit to end the quarreling and speak for herself. _"I was caught out, you two,"_ she signed at the twins but did so over her head to be seen by the four of them. _"But I also thought it'd nice be eat with them."_

That appeared to calm them somewhat. Seriously, what was up with them four bickering about where and whom she spent her time with? But as they mellowed down, the dinner for three turned to a dinner for five. And like before, she didn't eat much. Instead she listened.

As the conversations got more interesting, she asked for a bottle of sake for the occasion. If she was going to stay here and idly sit by, she might as well enjoy it too. By the time desert came around, she had already downed a bottle and a half and there was still room for more.

"Oh, peach flavor. For being a rot, you sure have taste _."_

Judar. There was no need to turn to see it'd been him with the rude comment. Instead, she took another cup and poured him some. _"How about you shut your mouth and we have a little drink instead?"_

"Ha!" he burst out, taking his cup and spilling some over from so much moving. "You'll fall over before I even start on my third drink."

Kohaku scoffed; she highly doubted that. But since she was currently on a quest to seek some amusement, she didn't question the high regards he had of himself. _"Is that so. Care to prove it?"_

"Get ready to lose." The first drink was downed faster than she could see. He let out a huge gasp as the alcohol ran down his throat. Kohaku giggled and raised her cup to give cheers before downing her own cup much slower than he had. The table rattled when Judar slammed the cup down onto the table before her. "Fill it, rot."

 _"As you wish,"_ she replied with a smug smirk, filling both their cups. Judar quickly drank his cup again but before she could follow suit, the other four came around to notice their little duel.

"Haku-nee, you shouldn't be drinking!" Suisei gleefully called. Her hand reached over for the bottle but Kohaku withdrew it before she could touch it.

"Didn't you say you were laying off the liquor?" Sousei inquired with a raised eyebrow.

 _"A couple drinks won't hurt."_

"A couple drinks?" Kouha repeated with a smirk himself as he reached down beside her chair to snatch the already empty bottle. "Or a couple _bottles_?"

 _"Same difference."_ Before the twins could keep nagging her, she asked the servants for more cups which she came to fill up to the brim alongside Judar's. Motioning to them with the hand holding the half-empty bottle, she grinned. _"We're celebrating, right? Let's do it right."_

"Celebrating what?" Kougyoku asked. Nearing her lips against the rim of the cup, she grimaced a tiny bit before smacking her lips. The taste of the alcohol vanished pretty quickly and all that was left was the sweet taste of peaches.

 _"That we're here, alive."_ The morbid comment made them all turn to her but she dismissed it with a shake of the bottle. _"What? I've come back to the palace after a decade and I want to be happy about that. Is it so hard to believe?"_

"You're much chattier when you're tipsy, ain'tcha?" Kouha commented smugly.

 _"Alcohol loosens the lips. Or...hands, in my case."_ She shook her head, her smirk widening as she raised her glass. _"Forget about that. Let's just forget about tonight and drink till we drop!"_

"And you'll be the first to fall dead drunk, _Taozi."_ Not minding the underlying promise of defeat, Kohaku knocked her cup with his before raising it for the rest of them. Giving up to her cheerful endeavor, they raised it and called for cheers.

* * *

Many dares and four bottles of peach liquor later, Kohaku realized she'd been right to underestimate their capabilities. Surely, none of them had messed up their bodies with as much alcohol as she had to last past a bottle.

She held still a half full cup as she gazed at the terrible mess the five young ones had done of themselves.

Kougyoku began drifting off after her third drink and dropped to her current mellowness in her fifth. Being the baby among the group, alongside Kouha, she hadn't expected much from her. Suisei dropped along the same time but instead of calming down, she went into this giddy and chatty mood. Yet no matter how much she kept talking, Kohaku couldn't understand a single thing from the slurs that came out of her little sister's mouth. Kouha held on until the seventh or eighth round. He was currently bickering with Sousei about...fishes? At least that's what it sounded like; that or another word she didn't really like to hear from Sousei. Speaking of which, Sousei had lasted longer than she'd expected. He actually lasted until they finished the second bottle. After that, he spiraled down faster than a change of the wind. And he became rowdy as could be. Kohaku got the feeling that the boy kept a lot more pent up than she gave him credit for. They all had their demons, she supposed.

As for the magi that had initially challenged her, well—she patted Judar's head as he laid on her lap completely passed out. Poor Judar had been the first to knock out just a bit before Kougyoku. Oh, he'd never hear the end of it now.

But as the servants began to clean what was left from dinner, Kohaku noted that she had to wrangle five drunkards out of there.

 _Damn. I didn't think this through._

In her head, she heard Marbas snicker and Beleth laugh. The former spoke over their laughter, _"Wanted to celebrate, didn't ya?"_

It couldn't be helped, she supposed. She brought this upon herself. Shaking Judar awake, she got him to wobble up and stand as he rubbed at his eyes, groggily. The image of him tired and sleepy reminded her that she only had a short time before the drunkenness faded and they knocked out like Judar had. Certainly, Kougyoku and Suisei were headed there fast. Kohaku needed to figure out where to take them and fast.

 _"Your room is the closest one, my king."_ Beleth's voice made it a bit easier to think above the slight haziness in her own head. Damn, the alcohol was starting to get to her now. She needed to hurry.

Since she couldn't exactly corral them like a bunch of wild horses, she opted for the second best choice. Undoing the ribbon from her ruqun, she tied one end around her wrist before starting the loop. It was a small technique she'd seen out in town in orphanages or schools with young children; a child train, one right behind the other and a rope around them to keep them in line. That'd be the easiest method.

She needed Judar closer to her since he was the most out of it. And because she trusted Sousei's integrity the most, she placed him at the end. Kouha, Suisei, and Kougyoku lined up after that perfectly. Despite their wobble, Kohaku thought it good enough to work the small distance to her room.

Signing to them as they were would be a waste, so instead she directed them forth and a single tug was all it took. Thanking the servants for the dinner she headed out with her little train of drunkards behind her midst. Thankfully, her plan worked up to the parlor of her room. The first to fall was her back line with Sousei finding a snuggly place to sleep on her lounge. Her front line fell a few steps after when Judar almost made her trip by falling asleep in the middle of the damn room.

The girls and Kouha at least lasted to her bedroom where she arranged them well enough to be comfortable. They took most of her bed but she wasn't about to fall asleep either so it wasn't a big deal. Kouha laid between Sui and Kougyoku with the two snuggling up against him as they slept. She went to quickly check on Sousei and Judar, giving them both blankets and Judar a pillow for comfort.

Her mission to bring them safely to bed done with, she thought it a good idea to undress from the fancy robe they'd let her borrow. Cleaning all the make-up off and undoing her hair, she went into the private bathing room of her quarters to change. As she did so, however, her eyes caught the sight of her bare body.

Despite her mind starting to get foggy, her eyes were just fine. They spotted every inch of her scarred skin from past abuse and battles. The scars ranged from small pricks to medium slashes and those were the ones around her abdomen. The ones around her chest were worse; burn marks even deeper wounds from smaller blades. Thankfully, she still wore the small underskirt from her ruqun that hid the ones she thought most hideous. She hated looking herself in the mirror for that same reason. Before with the Ren siblings, she'd avoided any suspicion because she dressed herself. That hadn't made the fear that they'd peek by accident go away, however. There was no denying that if anybody saw the scars her body held, they would instantly know they weren't all from battles. Some—if not most—were too meticulous to be.

Wanting to get that grim reminder out of her head, she changed into the white robes she usually used for sleeping. But she didn't want to really sleep at the moment. And it had nothing to do with the sleeping beauties scattered around her room.

Not resting after drinking so much would bring her hell the morning after; she knew as much from experience. But back when drinking was a bad habit of hers, she had mostly done it to conceive some sleep without waking every other hour. Now it kept her awake. And despite not wanting to sleep, she knew that it would hit her sooner rather than later. Defeated and knowing it was bound to happen, Kohaku thought best to simply go with it. But if she was going to knock out, then somewhere quieter and more relaxing would do.

 _Falling asleep in the study doesn't sound so bad._

She'd done it before by accident. Sure, her back would hurt but at least she knew she would rest well after letting her mind drift out into far off lands with magic knights and princesses. Fairytales sounded good right about now. Perhaps in this study they'd have some variety like they did back at her home. That thought drove her out of her room and to the study.

Stumbling a bit, she had to catch herself as she reached the doors and quietly opened them. Her hearing was a bit blown from the drinking, though, and were less sensitive than usual. It pretty much was like her normal hearing before Beleth. Perhaps that dullness of the senses was what didn't warn her of the person she found in the study.

It took a couple blinks before she recognized Kouen. Rubbing her eyes to assure herself he wasn't some hallucination from her drunken stupor, her breath hitched. The last thing she wanted was to see him. Not today after all the news. But as she got closer, her ears caught the soft sound of...deep breathing.

Coming closer to the desk, she found him sound asleep. His hand supporting his head as he laid on it while his other hand languidly held onto an open, half-read scroll and a single candle to light the room. Just to put her anxieties to rest, she slowly waved her hand a few times before his face with no reply. Kouen was completely out of it.

That gave her a little peace of mind. But her reading forgotten, she focused on the man that sat behind the desk. Despite how menacing and overpowering he appeared to be, he seemed sort of vulnerable now. And that might be a bit of a stretch. Perhaps vulnerable wasn't the correct word.

Reachable fit best.

When they trained, it was a matter of mentor and student. That was debatable as well. During her studying, he was more of an onlooker since Koumei took over the mentor position there. Anywhere else, he was the First Prince of her country. Any which way, he sat above her. Pedestaled as a prince and commanding general, but never seen for the person he was. It kind of made her sad to think of it that way. His position along with Koumei's and Kouha's changed so drastically after the death of three people. Three lives—insignificant to world itself—that caused a drastic change in the lives of many inside the smaller picture. How easy power shifted.

 _Terrifyingly easy and no one seems to care._

It bothered her that she could easily assay that about people. They would follow those most capable but never wonder about the strain put on those few. It's why she understood Sousei's fear to lead—his fear to disappoint—so well. If people didn't lead, they followed. If they followed, they didn't need to plan. And if plans failed, it didn't fall upon them. The guilt fell on others. It fell on the handful they entrusted, the same they were so quick to turn on.

For her, there was no better example than Masami. Years ago, she was the sweetest older sister she could have ever wished for. She'd been caring, loving, and all the bit protective of her as she was of the twins. Then reality knocked on both their doors and crashed onto them. It destroyed their relationship and no matter how much she tried, she knew there'd be nothing to appease her.

Masami was as vengeful as she was loving, and she would run Kohaku to the sticking place so long as she drew breath. The worst part was that she couldn't blame her for that. At least not completely.

Thoughts about Masami brought back the reminder of the early morning news of her marriage to the man that sat right before her. A man that, despite being so overwhelming at times, was forthright to a fault. Complete opposite of what she knew of Masami.

 _You don't deserve her._

They didn't deserve each other and yet—from what their parents and the empress said themselves—it was meant to happen.

But she didn't want those thoughts now. She wanted peace. Stumbling off to her corner, she picked her journal from its hiding spot and took it back. With only the single candle as light, she had to quietly bring a chair close to the desk to sit before sitting down and attempting to write. But nothing came to mind. Instead she kept doodling. Her fingers brushed against the carnation hairpin and she began drawing sad excuses for flowers, carnations or others. There was no way for her to concentrate. Without knowing it her hand began to write nonsensical words. At noticing this, her eyes flickered down to the page.

 _Marriage. Tied. Gone._

Extremely irritated, she ripped the page and crumpled it up before throwing it out wherever it fell. Even through the haziness, her anger sprung out at being unable to figure out why she was so irked about Masami's marriage. Shutting her eyes, she ran her fingers through her hair trying to sway those idiotic thoughts away.

 _"You're not mad that it's her."_

Her gaze lifted from her journal and the hairpin to the man that still, despite the small noise she made, remained sound asleep.

 _"You're mad that it's_ him _."_

 _That can't be._

Certainly, she could care less who Masami got married to. That was something she didn't give two damns about. But Kouen? Kohaku scoffed at the ridiculous idea. She had no right to care. She was nothing to him and the same went for him as far as she was concerned.

 _"Liar."_

 _I don't..._

She couldn't.

 _"You can't help it. Just like you couldn't be—"_

Quicker than she intended to, Kohaku snapped her journal close with the hairpin stuck in between its pages. She was tired of listening to such ludicrous notion.

 _I don't._

 _"Prove it."_

Her gaze lifted up to Kouen and she watched for a few seconds as his chest slowly rose and fell as he breathed in and out. Blissfully in slumber, he was completely oblivious to the daring conversation going on in her head.

 _"If you think you're so right, then prove it. If you do and it's nothing, you win. If you do and you feel_ something _..."_

 _I don't._

And she'd prove it.

Rising from her sit, she stood idly for a few more minutes wanting to know for sure that he was sleeping. If she was going to prove it to herself, then she'd need him practically knocked out for what she wanted to do.

Her mind raced as she stared unable to believe what she intended to do.

 _Do it. It'll be small. Just a brush and that'll be enough._

It'd be enough.

Grabbing her hair out of the way, she moved her chair aside to leave her some room to maneuver. Fortunately for her, the way he'd fallen asleep was more than appropriate for the smallest of pecks. Using one hand to support herself against the desk, Kohaku took a deep breath to keep it from giving her away before leaning in. Scared at feeling his breath as he slept, she stopped briefly but before she could back down and lose, she brushed her lips against his.

Like she'd planned it, it'd been small. Just a touch of her lips against hers. That was all. And yet as she pulled back—as quietly as she could to ensure he remained unconscious—she couldn't help the slight lightheadedness that struck her.

An instant went by before she felt the blood rush to her face. Stumbling back to her seat, her fingers came up to touch her lips unable to believe the warmth that overcame them at such reckless touch. Heaving a sigh, she laid her head down on the desk just atop her journal.

 _"So...did I win?"_

Not deeming the question worthy of an answer, she snuck the journal from beneath her head and slammed it on her lap. Still, she could feel the blood rush through, a bit of adrenaline and euphoria mixed into the bunch.

It was just a touch.

 _"A kiss."_

It meant nothing.

 _"You're not fumbling over 'nothing.'"_

 _I can't—_

 _"Why not?"_

That simple question harbored much more than she thought possible. Her fingers wrapped tightly around the journal, feeling the hairpin jut out from between the pages.

 _Because...everyone I love dies._

The conversation ended there.

Kohaku felt the tears sting slightly at the grim reminder. She wasn't one to believe in superstitions but that one fact always made it hard for her not to. Anybody important to her died one way or another. Always early, always unexpectedly. Always with her unable to stop it. That prompted her absurd obsession with the twins' safety. If she lost them or even Masami...she wouldn't be able to stand it.

The simple notion of that even happening made her stomach turn. But the alcohol and fatigue were hitting her hard. Her plans of reading or writing left behind, her brain and the little cells still alive after her binge drinking drove her to an edge she tried to fight against. She couldn't fall asleep here. Not after what she'd done. But her body won the battle and before she even realized it, she passed out.

* * *

The action delicate, Kouen brushed his thumb against his lower lip before gazing over at the woman now asleep next to him. Her head on the desk and one arm tucked underneath it, he heard Kohaku's slow breathing. He caught the hint of liquor when she'd leaned in, so the notion of her being drunk hadn't been wrong. At least he surmised as much the moment he saw her stumble further into the study and come back.

He hadn't thought it important to remain awake. As exhausted as he was, he needed his rest. Not every damn day did he give himself up for military benefits. On the upside, Kouen supposed that it would be the one and only time he'd do such thing. The Eastern Isles were a beneficial asset to conquering what remained unclaimed of the east but Reizei Koujiro had been adamant about his terms for over two months. Kouen had, in the end, caved in and accepted the man's plea. In exchange for the Isles, he'd marry his oldest daughter.

Over the years, he bore witness to the benefits his father had sown from marrying his half-sisters off to neighboring countries. They were nothing more than subsidies in exchange for allegiance. And he stood aside seeing the means to an end more valuable than what they were giving. Certainly his siblings understood at least that much just as he understood the role of his marriage now.

Kouen would go through with it if to obtain the Eastern Isles. But it didn't mean that it hadn't caused him a headache or two. Most likely a chronic migraine by how the aching hadn't given way since a few days now. They didn't seem to stop ever since he sent his acceptance letter to Shika. But he knew surely he'd learn to shoulder that burden with time the same way he carried the rest. Yet he felt a bit perplexed at Kohaku's impulsive action. Surely he blamed it partially on the liquor—the bitter-sweetness of it lingered on his lips still. But he also knew what alcohol did; it was but a temptress in excess and it unbridled whomever fell for it. And by the smell of it, she'd fallen hard. And it knocked her out completely.

Rolling away the stiffness from his shoulders, he deemed it about time to go rest himself. But his conscious caught up to him when he saw Kohaku shift a little in her sleep. If he left her there, she'd wake up sore. He'd live through a series of nights like those before and they hadn't done much except irritate him.

A part of him wanted to just leave her. Another part didn't want to be responsible for anything that could happen to her if he left her there.

It'd be faster and easier to just wake her up. But no matter how much he nudged at her, she was impervious to waking. She shifted from time to time but never more than a grimace of discomfort left her before she went swiftly back to sleep. A bit annoyed, he shook her hard enough for her to jerk in reaction. Throwing her arm out, he stepped back to easily avoid whatever she'd thrown at him along with her open palm. He heard the clattering and scattering of pages that made him turn to the side and click his tongue in annoyance.

A journal. It'd been the journal she'd been holding in her lap that she so haphazardly threw in her sleep. A few pages had flown out along with a hairpin that had fallen closest to him. Picking it up, he turned it over in his hand and noticed the motif, a flower.

Carnation.

 _"White carnations. They have a beautiful meaning: purest of love and greatest of luck."_

Words spoken by a ghost of long ago rang through his head. But he had to settle his mind as he set it aside on the desk to pick up thefallen pages. As he turned each upright to tidy them, he noticed something odd. They weren't torn away pages from the journal itself. They were letters.

Inquisitiveness and desire for knowledge were his biggest folly. And this was no different as his eyes skimmed over the letter stacked above the rest.

 _My dearest little Ceara,_

 _What to say to you?_

 _It's only been a few weeks since our departure and since I've last seen you. Yet I miss you so. Even through the battlefields and horrid massacres I've seen in this war, nothing can outshine the thought of you. Simply remembering your eyes keeps me sane, anchored to know that I have someone who needs me. Someone that I need to return to._

 _You have father's eyes, you know. You've mother's name._

 _I can still remember the day you were born like it was yesterday, too. When you came into the world, you cried and it broke my heart._

 _Ever since then I made a vow to myself: I'm dedicating every day to you. Although domestic life was never quite my style, every time I see you smile, you knock me out and I fall apart. It's hysterical, actually. And here I thought I was so smart._

 _Ceara, you will one day come of age with our young nation. Even without father around, we'll live on. And I will fight for a brighter future for you. I'll do whatever it takes—even a million mistakes—to make the world safe and sound for you. I'll bleed and fight for. And make it right for you. Father always said that if we lay a strong enough foundation that it's only to pass it on to you. I don't just want to pass the foundation of our nation down to you. I want to give you the world because I know you'll blow us all away._

 _Someday._

 _I promise. I'll return home._

 _Always._

No signature. No name except that of the recipient's. And as he skimmed lightly over the rest, he noticed a pattern. They all ended the same. A promise to always return home. None where dated, either, but by the looks of it they were all from the same person.

 _It isn't your business._

But it made him curious, nonetheless. Not wanting to pry any further, he opened the journal on one end before placing the letters neatly folded inside alongside with the hairpin as it had been. Turning over to the small woman sleeping still, he didn't comprehend why she held such letters. But again he had to remind himself that it didn't involve him.

Tired as he was, he didn't think she'd wake up anytime soon. And leaving her here wasn't an option. _Her room isn't far anyway._ Foolhardy excuse but he'd take it. While handling the journal in one hand, he lifted Kohaku's small frame from the chair. She shifted slightly but returned to sleep quickly. Kouen knew that, because of the late hour, no one would be out to see this. If for her sake, he thought as much. Securing both the girl and journal in his arms, he made his way out of the study and towards her room.

Getting there was easy like he'd thought. What he hadn't suspected, however, was the people hoarded in her room. The younger twin and Judar were both passed out cold in the parlor. As Kouen treaded into her private quarters, he was slightly caught off guard at seeing his own siblings in the bed alongside with the older Reizei twin.

 _What in hell...?_

But as he caught a hint of alcohol in the room, he could deduce pretty much what caused their rooming together. Because of how the latter three where asleep on the bed, Kouen found himself moving Kougyoku to the side before he could even put down the sleeping woman he held in his arms. After a few minutes, he managed the impossible and placed her down with enough room for herself. Thankfully, the beds in the palace where big enough to make such accommodations.

"Oni...sama?"

Kouen's gaze lifted for a second to stare at groggy magenta eyes. Kougyoku's bleary eyes stared numbly at him as he stood over them. She moved away from Kouha making him snuggle closer to Suisei.

"Go back to sleep, Kougyoku."

"We didn't—" she yawned mid-sentence but continued, "...dinner."

"I know." He reached over and patted her head before undoing Vinea's vessel and letting her hair fall comfortably down. "Next time."

"You promise?" she asked.

 _"Always."_

"Yes."

Kougyoku gave him a small smile before her eyes drifted down to Kohaku who'd turned towards her. Smiling, she laid back down next to her. As if instinctively, Kohaku wrapped her arms tightly around Kougyoku—protectively almost—and both fell swiftly back to sleep.

Kouen couldn't help but watch for a few seconds. After a decade of being away, it took her less than three months to rekindle past relationships. Kouha talked plenty about her. Kougyoku was no different. Simply by this, it was evident they were close to her already. Koumei, at first, had thought her rash. After a while, he changed his tune saying that she was determined to learn; she wanted to better herself. He'd seen such vigor over the past months as well. That, along with the twins' persistence, was what made him send the request to Reizei Koujiro to reconsider his decision of accepting her as second-in-command of the Southern army.

Kohaku had shown she could be formidable, tenacious, and willing. She wielded power and did so with grace and veracity. If she continued on as she did now, soon she'd be a true force to be reckoned with.

It impressed him, really. Such a frail thing having so much power. He'd seen the same tenacity in Kougyoku which had fired his own persistence to give her a chance to prove herself. Kohaku had done that and yet still wanted more. Yet it didn't seem to be greed that drove her. No. Simply by looking at how lovingly she cradled Kougyoku in her arms, even he could tell no such thing as selfishness existed in the woman.

If he had to name her folly, he would have to blame the fondness she had for others. It drove her. It pushed her. And in a manic way, it controlled her. Kouen had witnessed his share of people over the years. He'd seen those controlled by greed, by pride, by fear, or by anger. But by their love for others?

She was the first.

But she was nothing more than a curiosity. At least in the future, his work would pay off. She would be stronger and be able to better utilize her abilities for the empire's growth.

Kouen set the journal with Vinea's Metal Vessel on the bedside table before heading out. For now, that would have to do.

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _I keep writing these chapters and they just keep getting longer -w- I hope you guys like long chapters because I can't seem to write them any other way for this story. I hate partitioning them so here it is. Took maybe two and a half weeks to write (Evernote helps a bunch when I'm mostly at school or on the bus to and from). And editing took about two/three days._

 _Lengthy process. But it's out!_

 _This chapter was more for those who seek to solve the mysteries within this story. Basically, my little children, I took a whole bread piece and spread the crumbs all over this chapter. It may not be complete but they're big pieces. And also don't be scared to be confused after this. It's a huge chunk of information to take._

 _I finally got to include some scenes with Hakuryuu~ He's a little sinnamon roll and I love him. Also, for those musical enthusiasts out there, the letter has lyrics from **Lin-Manuel Miranda's** **Hamilton** , **Dear Theodosia.** It's a really nice song and it fit perfectly with what I wanted to convey with it. So that's credit where it's due._

 _Let's give a quick shout out to those new wonderful people who've Followed and Favorited:  
_ ** _\- Rimefeather  
_ _\- Mitsuyuki-Hime  
_ _\- ailinkliang0  
_ _\- Yoruno Aozora  
_ _\- xXYuseiAkikoXx_**

 _Alas, it is time to say goodbye again. It'll be tough to write for this story, especially since it's sharing a slot with another new one I posted recently. The main focus will be on this one though so don't worry. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and stayed tuned for the next update!_


	6. Differing Notions

**Trigger warning.**

* * *

 _ **Chapter Six:**_

 _Differing Notions_

* * *

Marriage.

The idea was absurd and yet it befit her. Twice already their father had offered Masami for marital gain. The first to Prince Hakuyuu and that proved to be null quickly as his life, along with his brother's and father's, was snuffed out in the fire.

She hadn't been happy with that arrangement just as much as she despised this one. Yet not as fervently. Toying with the opaque silver band around her right ring finger, Masami couldn't keep from sighing in defeat. At least now there was nothing to be heartbroken about.

She no longer had a lost love to mourn over. It relieved and tore into her all the same to think that. All she had left was a ring of broken promises and letters of a youthful romance that never was.

 _"It's not much but it reminded me of you. Pure, simple, yet precious."_

Words. That's all Masami had left. That and one little girl.

 _He would detest you and curse you to the depths of hell if he knew the things you've done._

She didn't care anymore, honestly. He was dead. So was _she._ None cared for Kohaku even when they appeared to. They knew her as something she was not. They didn't know the truth that Masami did. And despite how chagrined she was about the fact, she would keep that secret to herself. For the time being at least.

It helped keep her in line.

And as far as she didn't fall out of line, Masami wouldn't break her deal. Although she accepted the fact of how sadistic her methods were, they worked. They alleviated...something. Never quite filled the emptiness though or dispersed the everlasting grief. And it wasn't like the little wretch didn't gain anything either. With pain she bought her silence.

 _For how much longer, though?_

Masami had to admit that keeping up with this was getting tiresome. Years of quiet had wrung her dry of patience. Violence kept her occupied; it was energy she expended towards war or the wretched lamb. But it was a pastime that, like any other, would lose its charm sooner or later.

And when that time came, she'd have to find another way to keep herself patient and the lamb tamed and quiet. Regardless of her spite, Masami knew that, no matter the circumstances, the secret held by them needed to be kept. For the sake of those oblivious to it.

Masami cared about her family more than anything. And if they were to find out the truth...

 _It would destroy them like it's destroyed me._

She wouldn't allow that. Their family was already shattered enough. A blow of such magnitude would kill them. So she would go on with the charade.

The marriage wasn't something in her power to change. Like before, she would remain quiet and this time truly go through with it.

 _"It must be hard to marry someone you don't love."_

"It was never about love, Cael." Her voice echoed quietly in her room during the midst of the night. "It's about obligation and my family's legacy."

A legacy that not all of them would get to see. But she would plant the seeds of that garden with blood and lies if she had to. Masami would make sure that her family survived the ordeals of this era. No matter the costs.

* * *

Her sister's marriage. Her own prospects to command. Her rekindling of past relations. Her discovery of new ones.

Two more months passed by with those ideas hopping interchangeably in her head. Despite her busy schedule, Kohaku couldn't believe that the smallest details still bothered her through the days that came and went.

Although bothered the first few days, she'd proven to herself that it hadn't been so much Masami's involvement in the marriage as it was Kouen's. And although she knew her place and where her boundaries stood as a mere general under his command, she couldn't quiet the thoughts that surfaced at the strangest of times. Usually when they were alone either after training or when she studied late into the night. She knew they weren't right but she found solace in them and let them be. After all, she would never again act on an impulse such as she'd done that night in the study.

Remembering it, though, brought some candid emotion in her that wanted to be freed. It reminded her of what she felt when she was younger, capturing dungeons. That euphoria and adrenaline of the unknown—of a feeling she couldn't quite place. Was it benign admiration or a blossoming emotion?

 _Whichever it is, don't let it grow._

Kohaku had to remind herself of that constantly nowadays. It would only bring her pain if she let it be. Infatuations were a garden that, if taken care of, could blossom beautifull. Childish as hers was, Kohaku knew that caring for this tiny bud she'd found would prove deadly. Masami and Kouen would marry and she, as their sister, would have to be happy for them.

 _That's just life._

And it hurt.

It was hard to settle that aside at times. Kohaku found herself thinking about it even today when she trained with Seijin. Twirling a staff about her body, the wood tapped against different parts of her before it settled down on the floor. Seijin, with his sword aloft and ready to strike, stepped forward. Distracted as she was, Kohaku failed to avoid it in time and instead took the attack at full strength. But tempered steel was mightier than crafted wood, and the sword cut cleanly through her staff. Quickly noticing the breaking of her weapon and only barrier, Kohaku bounced back but clumsily tripped on her own feet, sending herself down.

Seijin flinched at the loud clattering of wood and of his master falling flat on her back. He strode over to find her blinking owlishly at the ceiling and at him as he bent over to watch her.

"Are you all right, Miss Kohaku?"

Kohaku didn't answer. Instead she nodded and sighed, not reaching a hand out for him to help her up. Seijin took this as a sign that she was done for the morning which was much seeing as they had only been at it for twenty minutes. But he wouldn't complain about some free time. Instead he picked up after themselves, disposing of the broken staff and putting his own sword away, all the while Kohaku remained stagnant on the wooden flood of the barracks. Once done, he came back to her and sat beside her to stare out and accompany her.

"Something on your mind?" he asked without much preamble.

Again, no answer. After five months with her, Seijin knew that to be yes. If she was being so clumsy, then she surely had much to think about. He also knew that asking wouldn't do much. She would talk by herself when she wanted to.

So he waited and waited. Soon they spent the usual two hours of training simply staring out, listening to nature around them as time passed by. It was towards the end of their session that she raised her hands from her sides to sign at him.

 _"You've hit your peak of adulthood, haven't you, Seijin?"_

The boy flustered at such question. Averting his eyes, he nodded and hid his face from her. "I-I'm already at the age, yes."

Kohaku turned to lay on her side and tried to catch a glimpse of him before she asked her next question. _"Is there any girl you like?"_

"E-Excuse me?" he blurted out way too loudly, his cheeks beat red.

Forgetting her thoughts for a second, a grin grew on her lips before she got up and sat only to inch towards him. A finger raised, she poked at his side like a pestering child. _"Oh, is that embarrassment I see?"_

"Please don't, Miss Kohaku," he implored as his face got redder.

 _"Come on, Jin."_ She poked harder at his side enough to make him move her hand away. _"Who's the lucky lady?"_

"I can't."

 _"Seijin. I'm doing this out of concern."_ Throughout signing this, she held the crooked grin which told Seijin that it wasn't just concern that drove her to ask such things. _"Don't make me order you to say it. You know I hate that. So won't you tell?"_

Seijin flinched at that reminder. He'd grown loyalty to the woman that was now teasing him like an older sister. And despite never forgetting his position, not once had she ever technically ordered him to do anything. They were always favors that he was more than willing to do. But they both knew that if she were ever to give an order, he would follow it. Even about such an uncomfortable topic.

"I-It's one of the kitchen girls." Seijin lifted his gaze only to meet Kohaku's expectant eyes. She motioned for him to continue and he sighed at that. "We spend time together sometimes."

Kohaku couldn't keep from smiling. _"That's really great. I hope you get along with her well."_

"That's it?" Seijin flinched when Kohaku raised an eyebrow at such bold question. "I-I mean, your curiosity is usually not so easily quelled. If I may ask, what gives the question?"

This time, Kohaku was the one to refrain from answering. Instead she stood up and gave out a hand for Seijin to take and rise with her. _"Forget it. Let's go have something to eat."_ A mischievous smile came to her and it sent a chill down Seijin's back. _"And how about meeting that little lady of yours so I can get to know her better?"_

Seijin laughed nervously, unable to know whether she was joking or not. It wasn't until she hit his back and he fell a bit forward that he knew it'd been a joke. But all jesting stopped when Kohaku heard something coming from afar. Turning to glance over her shoulder, her eyes caught Masami as she quickly made her way towards them. Seijin noticed her thereafter as both raised to meet her: Seijin with a respectful bow but Kohaku with a simple wry smile.

A breathy 'there you are' comes from Masami before she stops before them trying to catch her breath. Once better, she turns to Kohaku with a steely glance. "Where have you—" She stopped herself briefly before going straight to the subject. "You're being summoned by the First Prince."

 _Kouen?_

 _"What for?"_

"Didn't say," Masami's eyes briefly came to Seijin who fidgeted under her scrutiny. "It's almost afternoon. Shouldn't you have been in the kitchen serving lunch?"

 _"He's not a palace servant, Masami."_

But Seijin cringed at hearing her remind him. "My apologies, my lady. Training with master went far longer than I anticipated."

"I don't want to hear excuses. Just go," Masami ordered.

Just as he was about to step out, Kohaku stopped him brusquely with a tight grip on his arm. With a stern frown, she eyed him before turning to Masami. _"What is this?"_

"I have lunch to prepare for Lady Masami and your siblings," he replied.

Kohaku shook her head at that. _"With who's permission?"_

"Mine." She breathed out through her nose, trying to calm herself as she turned to face Masami. "He's a servant of our house and he is to follow orders."

 _"Yes. Mine,"_ Kohaku clarified. _"He isn't a family servant, Masami. He is my vassal."_ Seijin got somewhat flustered at hearing that for the first time. _"You have plenty of others here. Push them around all you want but leave Seijin alone."_ Masami glared at her, arms crossed before her chest, while Seijin couldn't pry his eyes from either of them. Knowing she had to disperse the animosity out off of him, Kohaku turned with a reassuring smile. _"They'll be skipping lunch from now onward, Jin. Don't bother."_

"But—"

 _"That's an order, Seijin,"_ she signed with one hand while the other squeezed the arm that she still held. _"Leave us."_

Knowing when to obey, he retreated with a quick dismissal. From what she could see, Masami wasn't at all happy as the two saw him leave the empty barracks. Once gone, she turned with a furious glare. "How dare you."

 _"He's not yours to order around as you see fit,"_ Kohaku said.

"And you have no say in that matter." Masami's frown went away quicker than Kohaku thought possible as a grin took over. "In case you forgot, nothing belongs to you."

Kohaku had to frown at that. Despite it being the truth, she didn't see Seijin as an object like many others did. It was more than apparent to her that she owned nothing of what she called hers. Because she was under Masami's thumb, it all would go back to her in the end.

 _"Nothing belongs to me, true. But don't consider him amongst those possessions. He's a human being."_

The smile grew instantly into a full grin, smug as could be. "And that makes him different from you how exactly?"

 _Touche._

But Kohaku did her best to ignore Masami as she sidestepped her to head towards the council room where she knew Kouen would be. It was the best bet this time of day. Ignoring Masami's taunts all the way there, Kohaku's gut turned out to be right as they entered and found him and Koumei both in the council room. They weren't alone, however. Most of Kouen's household was there as well.

Some of them turned at her opening the door and smiled her way. Seishuu Ri was one of the more amiable ones along with Kin Gaku. The two frequented the training grounds where she and Seijin went to practice. Sometimes as spectators and others as sparring partners for the young vassal. More recently, though, they found it 'fun' to spar against her and her djinn weapon equips. There was no denying that she enjoyed it as well. It tended to be hard to find sparring partners that didn't hold back against her, Kouen being the exception.

She'd also met Shou En and Kokuton Shuu, the more reserved of the four Household Members. Kokuton Shuu was a bit more approachable after he'd seen the small child that she became with Marbas. Some kind of kin animalistic sense, she supposed. As for Shou En, he seemed to be a simple onlooker. That didn't mean she wouldn't invite him to some drinks here and there after she and the others finished their sessions.

Regardless of her previous acquaintances though, she felt the slight tension in the room as Seishuu Ri and Kin Gaku lost their grins when she reached the long standing table in the middle of the room. At the head of it, Kouen sat with Koumei standing at his side. The rest of his household stood behind the two at the ready.

Kohaku couldn't understand what they were doing here though. There didn't seem to be any time to wonder, though, as Masami quickly went to present themselves to the First Prince. Kouen's eyes lingered a bit on Masami and Kohaku pouted unable to stop herself.

When he finally focused back on Kohaku, she shook her anxiousness away before standing straight to pay attention. "Training with Seijin went on the long side I presume. Seishuu Ri didn't find you in the study or gardens."

She blinked a couple of times surprised that he knew her schedule so well. Not only that but the places she frequented otherwise too. _"Yes. But I heard you called for me, your highness?"_

Kouen turned to Koumei this time and let him take over. Koumei nodded before he began reading from a scroll he had open in his hands. "A nomadic tribe towards the northeast has struggled for the past few months to survive after the drought that's happened in the area. They have remained out of reach as of recently but they seemed to have settled towards the mountains. Despite their current circumstances, they have been one of the most prominent tribes still living in the northeast. Couriers that were sent prior to their escape north returned a couple of days ago with the results of the negotiations."

"Negotiations?" Masami whispered under her breath. Unable to understand, she pondered. Her face quickly contorted to one Kohaku knew tattled her thinking.

On the other hand, Kohaku could already think of some possibilities as to why they would do such thing. Normally, tribes like the one Koumei continued to describe were easy targets despite their size. Isolated out in the northern plains with no solid fortress to stand behind was bad enough. The drought that had been going on this past year meant that those once fruitful fields would be withering and efficiently making their survival that much harder. Surely, if given the choice now, they would surrender peacefully.

"They have refused our terms."

Eyes wide, Kohaku could hardly believe that. In the situation they were in, why would they sacrifice themselves for a pride that wouldn't feed them?

Koumei rubbed at the back of his neck as he finished the briefing. "Ultimately, the reason both of you were called was to input your thoughts on the matter."

"Ours, your highness?" Masami asked, incredulous.

"Answer."

Kouen's request was clear and to the point. Koumei hadn't been kidding. Their minds seemed already made from what she could discern which made it harder to understand why even ask them for their opinions.

Masami kept quiet for a bit longer, still thinking.

Kohaku, however, already had something in mind. But speaking before her older sister would be disrespectful, especially in front of others. Her troubles were already mildly bad from the fight about Seijin. Aggravating things more wouldn't bode well for her. So she waited instead and simply stared at the two princes as they waited with her.

"You've already your mind made up?"

Hearing Kouen address her, Kohaku nodded. But instead of signing anything, she turned to her side at Masami. A bit flustered at the scrutiny, she finally caved and decided to let her go first. Glad for the opportunity, Kohaku raised her hands.

 _"Offer help."_

Koumei blinked a couple of times. "In exchange for their surrender?"

She nodded in agreement. _"The droughts have brought the northern plains to unsustainable circumstances for tribes like theirs. They will run out of supplies sooner or later if they haven't already. And you said they had been edged alongside the mountains?"_

Koumei nodded as he brought his fan to cover his mouth.

That gave Kohaku a bit more information. _"Sustainability around there is worse. They'll need resources soon."_

"If they're as weak as you claim, then it would be much easier to just attack them and end this quickly," Masami interrupted wanting her two cents in.

Both brothers eyed the sisters, contemplating that each had an idea of their own. Experienced as they were, however, Kouen and Koumei could easily discern the flaw in that plan. And from what they could see of Kohaku's frown as she stared down at the map laid upon the table, she did as well.

"Do you have anything to dispute against such proposal?" Kouen asked.

Not raising her gaze from the map, she lifted her finger and pointed straight at the specific area where they had marked as the location of the tribe.

"What about the ravine?" Masami asked her with a slight glare.

Kohaku stared back as if surprised she hadn't seen it and what it meant if they did go with her plan. _"If they haven't surrendered that means they intend to fight. By the path of their migration, it looks like they headed straight to the ravine for a reason. If we fight them there, even with overwhelming numbers, the terrain won't allow the soldiers to travel through in large numbers. It would be a trickling threat that the tribe would be able to fend off."_

"She isn't wrong," Koumei reinforced. "Since our first attempts to reach them, they specifically traveled to the mountains and have remained there. And they, as well as other northern tribes, have been recorded to retreat further into the mountainous terrains where they can better fend off enemy attack."

"In that case..." Masami audibly clicked her tongue when no other idea came to her. "She's right. The best would be to offer them survival in exchange for their surrender."

 _But they won't surrender._

With all this new information it was easy to deduce that much now. They wouldn't have planted themselves in such place if they didn't mean to fight until they fell. But by the looks of it, either few or all of them would fall.

 _They shouldn't just die like that._

 _"Send me."_

All who managed to read her fast signs were perplexed. Koumei tilted his head, a sincerely curious look in his eye as he laid the scroll down and lowered his fan away from his face. "You, general?"

 _"To negotiate one more time."_

"What can you do that we haven't possibly tried?" Kouen inquired

 _"Actually talk to them as equals."_

There was no ignoring the small gasps that came from the few people in the room. Not because of the mere ridiculous statement but because she had so boldly stated her intentions in such passive aggressive manner. At reading her reason, Koumei looked over his shoulder to his brother who simply stared at the younger sister. Curiously enough he saw a glint of...something in his brother's eyes. Amusement?

His brother lifted a single brow at the statement before asking as question. "Are you insinuating we have not done so before?"

 _Not successfully, no._ But as much as she had gotten used to talking openly with him and Koumei, they were in different circumstances now. Those times where she could somewhat speak her mind were different compared to being out in public. As much as she disliked it, she had to be relegated back to a submissive subject. Not only as a mere general to their commander but as a subject to their prince and future emperor. _I hate power struggles._

 _"Perhaps I can give it a new perspective that could have been neglected."_

Silence came over the room as their General Commander mulled over the options offered by them. Kohaku could only stand back beside Masami as they waited for his answer. Like many times before, Kohaku could hear Masami's blood rushing through her veins from the anxiety. Working under pressure—yeah, not one of Masami's strongest points. It seemed that fighting for so long made her callous against such things. Whether it was good or bad, she didn't know. But she supposed that if it helped her stay cool when out in the battlefield, then it worked for something. Now it helped her stay cool and confident. And being better educated in an area where her sister usually surpassed her help keep that confidence at an all-time high.

There was no more doubting herself. She had the knowledge, the confidence, and the ingenuity to fight Masami on her own playground. And if there was one thing that she actually appreciated about speaking out in public it was that everything was fair. Masami could glare at her all she wanted but here it came down to whomever dealt best with the cards they had. And if Kohaku had done anything in the past five months, it was build herself a deadly deck alongside a mindset to use it.

"Very well." Both turned their gazes up to see Kouen as he rose from his sit. All those behind him stepped back as he came up. "You will join Koumei and myself on tomorrow's expedition."

A brighter grin couldn't have come onto her had she tried.

"She cannot."

Not astonished at the action itself, Kohaku was more amazed that Masami had spoken so boldly out of place. The perfect picture of properness, it wasn't something she usually did. She gave Kohaku a slight glare before turning with softened features back at the two princes. "Our father relegated his army to the both of us for a reason. Kohaku is not ready to go into the battlefield by herself."

It wasn't hard for anybody to hear the underlying tone of her words.

 _'Without me' you mean._

"My brother and king and myself have both spent time preparing General Kohaku for such situations," Koumei commented. "Are you questioning our capabilities on teaching her?"

"Of course not." Seemingly tired that the approach wasn't working, Masami treaded daintily over to Kouen's side. Without a word, she reached her hand out and wrapped her hands around his arm. Eyes wide, Kohaku couldn't believe that she'd mustered the courage it took to walk up to him much less touch him in such intimate way. In front of people. Unaffected, Kouen simply glanced down to meet her gaze.

 _Damn. She grew some_ —

"...please." Her ears perked at hearing the small whisper coming from Masami's mouth. Surely those around would be able to hear a soft mumble. As close as the two were, however, Kouen would most likely hear it as well. And probably unbeknown to the rest, she'd be able to hear it too without much trouble. "I love my sister and don't want her to be hurt. You can understand, can't you?"

Despite the semblance of privacy that she wanted to keep, Kouen didn't seem to care regardless. He didn't keep the pretense she had started, pulling her hands off of his arm. "I vouched to your father about her capabilities. From how I have trained her and from my own brothers' testimony, I can assure you of those as well. More than enough time has been put on her improvement and I do not resign from my word." Letting her hands fall and leaving her with those words, he turned to Kohaku. "We depart at dawn. Koumei will inform you of the rest. Don't be late."

That last sentence perplexed her. After almost five months of training sessions before the break of dawn, she thought if anybody knew about her punctuality it would be him. It actually took her a second to decipher exactly what those last three words meant.

 _Don't disappoint._

 _"I won't."_

Heaving a sigh, Kouen walked past Masami without another word. His household members followed somewhat perplexed with glances at Masami. From their looks, it made Kohaku wonder if their engagement was public news yet. If it wasn't, then Masami had done a very bold move there. And with that thought, if for a second, Kohaku admired the guts. But that quickly changed when she saw Masami glowering at her for a brief moment. It was so short that she thought she'd imagined it but knowing her, she most likely hadn't. That look was a promise for later retribution and she already felt her body bracing for the punishment to come.

Thankfully, as Koumei explained to her further what the plan for the expedition was, she came to forget about what was to come from Masami and instead focused and her first solo expedition. Well, not actually. And yet despite being in the company of the Western Subjugation Army's General Commander and his advisor, she knew that this was her chance to prove herself. For once, she felt thankful to Sou and Sui for convincing Kouen who ultimately gave her a second chance to advance herself. A higher status, even if just in the military, meant her influence could be more widespread. And the more widespread it could get the better.

Evening began to fall just as the meeting came to a close. Wanting to be as prepared as possible, she spent plenty of time afterward speaking with Koumei in the council room. Since it made it easier to avoid his other, more tedious tasks, he didn't complain much taking the time to explain what she failed to understand. As she read one of the scrolls with the records of what past negotiations had been done with the tribe, Koumei decided to ask a question.

"Did Lady Masami inform you about the marriage?" Kohaku stopped for a second before looking askance. Not wanting to lie but neither to talk, she nodded. "Do you approve?" Koumei lifted his gaze to find her with a raised brow, questioning his inquiry. He didn't take it seriously and instead yawned nonchalantly, "I ask out of concern and curiosity."

 _"Mostly the latter, I'm assuming."_

"You assume wrong." Kohaku couldn't have been more surprised. Koumei, usually being the quiet and reserved one of the three brothers, wasn't one to speak without caution. If anything he spoke much too blatantly and yet more indifferently than his older brother. And he never dallied when it came to his family either.

With that clearly cemented between them, silence came for a few seconds. It came so heavily that Kohaku couldn't concentrate on the scrolls she was trying to quickly memorize and dissect. Instead she focused on not letting her conscious eat away at her and decided to at least give him a decent response.

 _"I don't approve."_

It was Koumei's turn to be astonished. His eyes didn't widen but they did remain in contact with hers. "Really?"

Kohaku laid the scroll she had in her hands down on her lap as she searched for the proper way to explain things without actually putting Masami's image down. Then again, any which way she did put it, they all sounded terrible. But oh well, she'd tell the least bad of them.

 _"Masami's a very...hard headed woman, to put it nicely. Sure, she seems like the perfect picture of femininity but—"_

She could easily turn into a raging demon. But then again...blame was where it should be, she supposed.

 _Don't say it. Even if it is true._

"But...?"

She shook her head and instead shrugged her shoulders. _"She can be a handful. Both seem too similar to be able to be together."_

Going with the flow of the conversation, he continued prying. "Similar how?"

But Kohaku was fast to catch onto his intentions. _"You know, asking me would be much faster than trying to wriggle answers out of me with your cryptic questions."_

"Still not one to be caught off guard, I see," he replied with a small chuckle.

 _"Learn fast and learn right. Just like you taught me."_

"Then I'll get straight to the point," he added. "My brother and king shouldn't be degrading himself to marrying for territory."

 _"That's a woman's job. Is that what you mean?"_

"In our day and age, yes."

 _"And yet, huh?"_

Koumei saw her beating around the bush quite clearly. "You seem as downtrodden about this arrangement as we are." Not knowing how to answer that, she simply shrugged her shoulders. Such gesture just made him that much more curious. "Do you believe him worthy of your own sister?"

 _"He is a prince, heir to the throne of a grandiose empire."_ Kohaku twirled her feathered pen between her fingers, exaggerating every point with a stroke of the feather up like a checkpoint. Over the mannerisms, he could see the overwhelming sarcasm. _"Why wouldn't I think him worthy?"_

"Then why do you appear so bothered by the idea?"

Kohaku froze for a second. Was it really that easy to tell? So many things had gone over her head through the excitement of the expedition that for once in a long while she'd forgotten that small fact. She mentally wrote a note for herself to deal with that later. At least try to. But putting that aside, she smiled and turned to Koumei. _"I don't know about Masami but I know my family. Whatever they are doing it has purpose. And while I want to believe they have the country's best interest in mind, I also know what they have taught us: blood is always thicker than water. It's how we were raise to think."_

"I understand." But despite her answer, he still felt she'd just danced about the subject. She was hiding something and trying hard not to let it slide. "Do you believe that?"

 _"I love my family, your highness. Just as much as I know you do yours."_ Placing her pen back in her tresses, she sighed and picked up the scroll to put away. _"But I also believe that whatever foundation we lay will be for prosperity's sake, not ours. I want those that succeed us to never need for what's truly important."_

"What would that be?"

 _"Shelter, food, security. And for their families to prosper once we're gone. It's them who will provide them with those rights once we're gone, after all."_

Rubbing at his neck, Koumei couldn't help but sigh. Here he thought that she'd steer away from any sentimental outcome. Then again, from what his brother constantly said about her, her biggest folly was that unconditional love for others. "You're a simplistic woman."

That comment made her chuckle a bit as she stood aside for him to rise from his seat. Once he did, she gave back the scrolls he'd let her read for the expedition. _"I am, aren't I? I suppose you can say I'm moved rather easily then."_

"Indeed you are from what my brother and king tells me."

 _"He loves to gloat, doesn't he?"_

His turn to chuckle came then when she pointed out such thing about his brother. "Rarely. But when he does, the reason is quite evident."

 _"Am I supposed to be grateful somehow?"_

"You should," he tells her as he accompanies her back to her room. "It's rare to see my brother and king so invested in anything other than history or the good of the nation."

 _"Does this have to do with that reason you mentioned?"_

"You can't tell?" Koumei saw her shake her head from the corner of his eyes. Seeing that slight innocent gaze made him struggle with whether he should even mention such thing. "I'm not one to lay down answers, General Kohaku. I believe you've learned that as well from studying with me."

 _"And I equally appreciate and abhor that about having you as a strategy mentor."_

"I'm sure you will realize it soon." He stopped, making her do the same when they neared the door of her room. Surprising the two of them, they could see Masami standing outside the door as if she had been waiting for Kohaku to return. Knowing it best to leave them to speak, he turned back to her. "But I assure you, he wouldn't waste his time if he did not see potential in you."

The instant he finished that sentence, he saw a small change in the woman before her. Although she was staring at nowhere yet directly at him, he caught sight of it. It was subtle but he saw the slight dusting of her cheeks as she smiled. The simple gesture made her look years younger, her eyes glimmering a bit. Her grin widened as she lifted her gaze to him. _"You were right. I am grateful."_ She took a bow and saluted him before raising. _"Goodnight, your highness."_

"Yes. Goodnight, general," he said with a slight shocked expression, still affected by what he'd seen.

Stepping back, Kohaku headed to her door still a bit dazed. It soon went away at finally noticing Masami standing outside her door. Despite that familiar glint in Masami's eye, she didn't lash right away at seeing Koumei still looking at the two from afar. Instead she grabbed her, tight, and with a smile took Kohaku inside of the younger's room. The door quickly closed behind her and Masami dragged her all the way into the bedroom before shoving her to a sit. Before she could say anything, Kohaku felt the sharp pain of the slap that Masami brought down against her cheek.

"You cheeky little wretch." Pulling the feathered pen out of her hair, Masami grabbed her loose tresses by a handful before pulling her upward. Kohaku gasped from the pain but held in the cry when Masami kept her sitting with one hand while pulling with the other. "Whatever you're doing, you better stop."

 _"What am I—"_

But before she could even finish, Masami pulled harder at her scalp. "Don't play coy with me." Kohaku felt her scalp burning but focused more on Beleth's metal vessel that had strayed onto the floor. "Snaking your way into the royal family's favor, lamb. You thought I hadn't noticed?"

 _"My spending time with them?"_

"Gaining favor." Finally she took her hand away and pulled hard enough to lift her off the sit before throwing her at the floor. "Especially with the First Prince. Now you're not only a wretch but also a whore. Should have known."

 _"You're mistaken."_

"Am I?" she scoffed. "What else but a whore would seek all three of them out? I expected nothing less from you but them?" She shook her head in disbelief. "They must be idiots to fall to whatever treachery you've planted."

 _"Don't insult them."_

Pain for herself she could stand. But for her to slander them—some of the few people that she actually admired and genuinely liked being around—was something she wouldn't stand for. Before she could even repeat what she said, Kohaku felt the pain from Masami's sharp kick to her side. Grunting from the impact, Kohaku tried to be quiet but wasn't successful as more rained down on her.

"It seems you've forgotten who you're talking to." One last kick sent her a few feet away as she incessantly coughed from the onslaught. Masami took the few steps to her before taking a deep breath. "Whichever the case may be—and however you got them to accept an expedition for yourself—it doesn't matter. You still humiliated me there and someone has got to remind you of your place." Quickly searching through the folds of her ruqun for a small vial, she pulled it out, bent down, and held it out in front of Kohaku's face. "Now lamb, this here is a neat little concoction I put together. Some really interesting herbs and poison that I've been wanting to try out. But it seems to be too toxic for the vermin around here; rats die too easily, you see."

 _Oh, this._

This—being a guinea pig to test her sadistic hobby on was the worst of her punishments. The couple of times that she'd been made to do so had left horrible memories. The first had left her sick for a whole week, vomiting and nauseous. The second time around it left one of her legs feeling numb. Luckily, all those times, Masami had provided whatever antidote she'd concocted for the poison she made. Physical punishments were manageable for her because she knew what to expect. They would hurt and sting, but they would eventually heal over. With the poisons Masami made there was no telling what damage they could do to her health because they were all new.

Masami pouted childishly before anger overtook her. Taking Kohaku forcefully up from her forearm she thrust her to a sit. The chair wobbled from the force but Kohaku steadied herself quick enough to catch Masami treading through her room searching.

"I was thinking that perhaps something much sturdier would do to test what it's capable of." Soon enough, Masami came back with cup in her hand and the water jug from her room. Pouring a generous amount of water into the cup, Masami hummed something under her breath as she did so and it kept Kohaku on her toes despite still sitting. Uncorking the small vial, Masami weighed it down so only three drops fell into the cup. "That should be enough." Once done with it and putting it away, Masami took the cup in her hands to swirl it around before coming to stand before Kohaku once more. "Now, shall we?" she asked and brought the cup closer to her.

Incredibly, something compelled her to reproached. _"Please, not this. Hit me and cut me if you want but not this. Not tonight."_ Kohaku couldn't think what possessed her to say such things but she didn't want to be toyed with when she had such an important mission come the morning.

Unable to believe the words she'd signed, Masami raised a fine eyebrow perplexed. "Shall I remind you, lamb, that all I have to do for them—for _everybody—_ to know the truth is say one simple sentence, three little words? And believe me, it'll be enough for them to question, for them to search, and for them to figure out everything. You may be good at hiding, you damn wolf in lamb's clothing, but I know what _will_ kill you." Masami swirled the cup once more and brought it down to Kohaku's eye level. "And believe me, this little brew is nothing compared to the wrath you'll receive from those two once they find out what you've hidden from them for so many years."

Kohaku could do nothing but stare at the cup she held in those frivolous hands. Despite the horrendous screams of her gut telling her to just run and not do it, the illogical part of her that pinned her to her sit was boisterous. It rang in her head a warning bell much louder than the one pleading for her wellbeing—this one pleaded her to buy silence. She hated to admit it but Masami was right—regardless of the consequences she couldn't allow them or anybody to know.

 _Even if it kills me._

Hands damp and shaking, she took the cup and brought it to her lips. Not wanting to back down, she held her breath before tipping the cup to her lips and drinking the contents. Masami tilted the cup upward ensuring that she took every last drop. Kohaku coughed a bit at the bitter taste before a shiver went down her spine.

"Good little lamb." Masami took the cup to check she'd drank everything before putting it down. She smiled before turning to leave the room. "Be sure to take care of yourself tomorrow, all right? Wouldn't want to ruin the tests now."

The closing of the doors sounded much louder when Masami left this time. Kohaku felt weak despite only having just drank it. Her hands were still shaking and no matter what she did, she couldn't stop them or herself from shivering. Something ticked in her now, both a mental and physiological mine biding its time to detonate. And it would—she wouldn't know when or where or how, but it would. And what's worse was that she couldn't just lay bedridden to wait it out. If she didn't attend tomorrow's expedition, she'd lose much if not all of the trust and respect she'd earned.

 _You took both burdens onto yourself. Now carry them and take the consequences they bring._

Biting her lip, she went away and picked up Beleth's metal vessel before huddling on her bed. Her hands held both vessels close to her bosom, the tender voices of her djinn trying to assure her that everything would be all right.

Three drops wouldn't do much. No matter the strength, such dilution couldn't possibly do much harm.

She repeated those words over and over in her head, wanting to believe them. More like she needed to believe them. If she planned to carry on with the expedition the next day, then she would need to control her body through her mind. Thinking one is okay must equate that one _is_ okay.

Mind over body.

But the shallow thought left her dreadful as well as self-conscious. As idiotic as her decision had been, she had made that grave for herself— _in more ways than one._ All she had left to do now was hope that lying in it wouldn't cost her tomorrow's mission.

* * *

"This is it. The tribe of Baisè."

It took their small party a few hours to get through the mountain pass and the narrow ravine to reach where the Baisè hid themselves. Because of the current ceasefire, the chieftain had agreed to one last attempt at negotiations with the Kou Empire if they agreed to meet on his terms. Although Kouen and Koumei saw it idiotic, Kohaku actually agreed to it, adding that it would be a show of respect to follow such simple instructions. Perhaps the tread to and from where they left Koumei and the rest of the battalion would be painstakingly slow without magic carpets but it'd have to do. Mounted on horses, they met with their guide halfway through who then guided them to where the Baisè were located.

The sight of their terrible state turned Kohaku's stomach. The huts they lived in were mostly tattered, some burned at places. The people weren't much better; it didn't take her long to notice the dilapidated state the tribe as a whole was in. Most of the men were absent with just women attending to what they could. What she did manage to notice on their way to the chieftain was the children. The young greatly outnumbered the old, and many were malnourished with clear signs to show it. It broke her heart to see them like that.

"Miss Kohaku." As they stopped their horses, Seijin, who'd been the only one she'd brought along, called her in a whisper. "Are you all right?" An eyebrow raised at hearing this. Seeing her confusion, Seijin pursed his lips before answering. "You seem...jittery."

Instinctively, Kohaku hid her hands underneath her cloak as she stepped down from her stallion, slowly and carefully. Feigning a smile, she signed. _"Yes."_

But as soon as she was done, she hid them back beneath the cloak. As she had suspected, the poison had shown effects soon after it had time to course through her body. At first they were just slight movements of her fingers that she wanted to chalk up to involuntary spasms. But as the morning and their journey continued, they kept getting more noticeable and they were not just uncontrolled convulsions. For brief moments, she could swear that the fingers on her right hand began to feel stiff. Numb almost. But moving her hand and stretching her fingers constantly helped keep it manageable. For the moment, her priority would be to keep the side-effects of the poison hidden and as under control as possible. The spasms would be hard to deal with but she had the stiffness under control so far. That was something.

Leaving the horses behind once at the foot of a particular hut, Kouen stayed behind with the small troops they got to cross the mountain range with and only she and Seijin followed the guide further in. At fully entering, she was surprised to see the actual size of the place and the fact that it was packed with the chieftain and what she presumed to be his confidants. Out of respect, the two bowed and saluted at their company with the chieftain keeping a stoic expression.

"I welcome you."

Not missing a beat, she smiled kindly and signed with Seijin swiftly translating. "We are pleased that you have welcomed us once more."

He raised an eyebrow at what every person always did but didn't fester on it and decided to continue on with the conversation. "We do so with amiability, child."

"General." Kohaku frowned at Seijin who'd spoken so out of place. His stern expression swiftly softened, "My apologies."

The chieftain cleared his throat before motioning for her to sit down. The two followed his instructions and the chieftain continued without preamble. "Let us not delay this talk any longer, General. It is to my knowledge that you have come with new terms for our surrender."

Kohaku nodded. All through their trip to the mountains, she had mulled over how to appear to the Baisè chieftain and his people. At first she thought that opting for default stoicism like Kouen or Koumei would be wise, but after seeing the state of their people—so beaten and downtrodden—she knew that would only be a tactless thing to do. And frankly it wasn't something she felt she could pull off. So instead she pursed her lips solemnly before signing.

"Before that...if it's not too imprudent of me to ask, how has your tribe come to such state?"

Again, he raised an eyebrow perplexed. "I am sure your informants already told you: the drought has kept us limited in supplies and that has dwindled our numbers."

"No." Kohaku paused and took a breath before continuing. "I meant the searing on your huts and the fact that I only saw women and children about. You've suffered through more than just a drought."

There wasn't an answer at first and it wasn't unexpected. In fact, she herself thought the question cheeky but it was one she had to ask. If she was going to do this, then she would do this her way. Finally, he answered. "Raiders. They have taken advantage of other small tribes that have also suffered from the drought. Our men protected the settlement but most of them did not return."

That's why they ran to the mountains. It wasn't only because of the threat brought by Kou but also from those that also resided in the northeastern plains. The more Kohaku thought about it, the more the little pieces that hadn't made sense before began fitting into place. Threatened by all sides, the Baisè sought only to survive. And that was just...not living.

Kohaku sighed knowing that they wouldn't want to prolong this if not necessary, so she didn't. "Then I believe that this is in your best interest. Your people don't seem capable of surviving for much longer."

"What do you propose?"

"As you so wisely surmised, we are fully prepared and at the ready to attend to your people's needs and to your men's injuries in exchange for your abdication," she explained. "Just past the mountain range are the rest of our troops at the ready to help if you agree to those terms."

But he didn't say anything; he simply scoffed. "You people of Kou see nothing but opportunities in the despair of others. Truly disgusting."

Seijin grunted but Kohaku didn't react. Despite not liking the disgrace, she couldn't say she completely disagreed. Kohaku herself saw the advantages they were taking with the Baisè most vulnerable. And although she knew it wouldn't be pretty, she hadn't expected it to be so hard to swallow. But she eventually did and replied.

"Despite what you may think of us, I believe you have your people's best interest in mind. And the way I see it, there are three outcomes depending on your answer to these negotiations." Putting one hand with her palm out, she tilted her head that way. "One: you agree and cooperate. This would be the simpler solution for both parties. You ensure your people's survival and avoid further attack from raiders. Two—" She laid her other hand the same way and her head followed suit. "You refuse and fight back. After being attacked before, your people do not seem capable of such feat. You would only lose more numbers and the conclusion would remain the same."

"And the third?" he asked.

"You run." Kohaku raised her gaze then and met his. "And you expose your people to complete eradication. The way your surroundings are you could possibly last a few months. Longer if you manage to find resources. But you also risk encounters with the raiders again. And, as I said before, your men cannot take another fight. By the looks of it, neither can your people take another step."

"You thought about this, haven't you, General?"

Kohaku nodded. "I wished to provide you with all the possible options, regardless of whether they benefited us. Be sure to know, though, that our General Commander will continue his pursuit if I am to fail. In the end, however, the decision is yours to make."

The chieftain clicked his tongue and motioned his confidants forward as they began to exchange whispers amongst each other—some in angry protest, others in genuine concern. Wanting to deal with a problem of her own, Kohaku signed at Seijin about his outburst. Ashamed about it, Seijin signed back that he was terribly sorry about that. Kohaku exhaled through her nose but didn't think she'd have to reproach him for it. Even after that, though, they waited for a longer time still. Whenever they seemed to finally have an answer, they would ask more questions of her. Some she already thought ahead for while others she had to be quick on her feet to answer. None seem to take more than a few seconds for her to come up with a reasonable answer, though. For once, Kohaku surprised herself. Before, she seldom could think that fast on her feet when attending political council meetings and most of the job would be left to Masami despite being such a nervous wreck at times. Now...it really amazed her how far her perseverance got her.

And they also gave some fruition apparently because after a couple of hours of questioning, they finally decided upon an answer.

"General." Called out of her thoughts, Kohaku and Seijin raised their gazes and met the whole council. "We see the options you have given us and you are not wrong. My people will not last much longer the way we are now. We discussed this previously when your country first sent in negotiators and our prospects have not improved. Regrettably, we have come to an accord." Some of the members tried to stop him but he didn't hesitate after a brief second to sigh in defeat. "We agree to surrender to the Kou Empire."

There was no denying the answer she'd heard with her own ears. They agreed; she'd done it.

 _Why do I feel so heavy then?_

The chieftain and his confidants stood and she and Seijin followed. "We will sign the treaties your previous negotiators have placed on the table as well." He reached out to shake her hand and she reciprocated. As soon as she got close, however, he retracted his hand for a second. "But only after my people have been treated and we are safe past the mountain range with the battalion you have brought."

Kohaku didn't hesitate to nod. He sighed one last time before shaking hands with her. Only after he'd let go did she have a moment to breathe easy. The men allowed her and Seijin to exit first as the tribesmen followed behind her. The chieftain came to her side and informed her that she would have his people ready to embark before nightfall came. She agreed saying that they would inform the General Commander of the situation and prepare themselves as well.

With that they parted ways and she quickly made her way to the small clearing where the group she'd come with were at. Seeing her, Seishuu Ri and Kin Gaku allowed her inside Kouen's encampment. Alone, she saluted him before she hurriedly explained the results and their current situation. It only took a few minutes to retell what'd happened during the last three hours of meeting she'd endured and, thankfully, it'd come to a good conclusion.

"It took you three hours to convince them," he mulled as he stood and walked over to her. "Somewhat slow and that you accepted for their written approval until we cross is amateurish, but the fact that it gave positive results is satisfactory enough. You've learned well." The compliment ran through her head and she smiled, glad that she hadn't disappointed him. Having looked away after speaking, Kouen relayed the rest of what would be done. The heavily injured would be dealt by him, only enough for them to travel across the ravine while she and his Household Members rounded the soldiers for the trek. She accepted her orders and he took that as the end of the conversation. He went off to ready himself but was perplexed as to why she hadn't left yet and instead stood with a slight frown. "Was something unclear, General?"

Kohaku lifted her gaze but quickly averted her gaze before pursing her lips. Kouen knew that expression. "If you have anything to say, say it."

 _"It felt..."_ Kohaku struggled to find the right word as she wrung her fingers, " _burdensome."_

That made him lift an eyebrow at the choice of words. "Burdensome how?"

Wringing her fingers and hands again, she slowly responded. _"To give them such narrow choices, pushing them when they're at their most vulnerable. It felt like placing a heavy burden on them and myself. And I don't know if that's the right word to describe it either."_

Kouen looked at her despite the fleeting of her eyes before sighing. Coming to stand before her, he stared down. Although Kohaku could pull herself together quickly, there was still that glint of remorse in her stark blue eyes. "It's not, but it is accurate to have such sentiment." When she glanced up, her expression more than confused now, he deemed it necessary to actually explain. "They are burdens you will have from conquering those who do not wish to be conquered, of extinguishing the lingering flame they call individuality for the betterment of your own country. It is the same that I and the rest of my family bear."

 _"I understand that. It's just—"_

 _It seems you're the only one burdened heavily by it._

"Just what?" he asked curiously.

She shook her head before quickly saluting him once more and smiling wryly as she lifted her head. _"Thank you, truly, for all the guidance you have given me. If you'll excuse me."_ With that, she hurriedly made her exit. Left alone, he stared after her thoughtfully. After interacting with her for so long, he came to recognize that during somber discussions she would constantly "hold her tongue," for lack of a better word. That, in itself, was quite rare seeing she constantly couldn't keep to herself. What he'd seen a few seconds ago was that same glint that darkened her bright eyes every time he caught her daydreaming during their sparring sessions. It was a far-off and detached look and she always turned quiet after being caught on one of her dazes.

It was the quietness that somewhat disturbed him. But perhaps he was imagining it. After all, this was the first mission she'd gone on without her sister present. Perhaps the nerves is what made her such a demurred women for once. Not to say that such contrast to how she usually was wasn't vexing but it could very well have such simple explanation.

Nevertheless, Kouen finally got some confirmation about her improvement. Although, he'd been sure that the Baisè would agree to their terms regardless, it'd been more of a test for her to find those vulnerabilities, exploit them in their favor, and present them to the opposing party in a manner they would be unable to refuse. And although it took her far longer that he and Koumei had calculated it should have, she at least came out of the negotiations with the wanted outcome. It was a crude example to test her full abilities on, but it'd been enough to see how far five months of studying had brought her. And it'd been much by the looks of it. For the moment he supposed it'd be sufficient enough make a decision as to what to tell her father.

But that would come later. Grabbing his sword, he headed out already having to do much healing before they were ready to escort the Baisè out of the ravine.

* * *

It was hard to gather the Baisè people once they were packed. Especially the fact that most of them couldn't stop glaring her way; that wasn't helping much of her already dampened esteem, for sure. But she had to ignore it and carry on. They still had a few hours of daylight when they finally got everyone ready to go. From before, she could tell that it would take them just the few hours of daylight they had left and perhaps one more before they reached the battalion on the other side. The darkening skies above them worried her as well. She wondered if possibly the drought would finally end but thought it a false warning. At least she hoped so; rain wouldn't help them. But that was a very small probability and so long as they kept together and kept a steady pace, it would be a trek with few problems.

Kouen and his household led the way with the Baisè people surrounded by soldiers to either side while she and Seijin took the rear, making sure no one stayed behind. She did her best to ignore the people that still glared her way and instead paid more attention to keeping them safe as they began to enter the ravine and walk on the narrow trails it had. It amazed her that Seijin didn't seem as affected by what'd happened as she'd been. Then again, he had other important tasks to do, ones which she'd given him.

"The soldiers from the northern peninsula have already sent their responses." He read aloud from a scroll he kept the accounts of everything on. She didn't understand how he could multi-task so perfectly at reading and riding his horse without falling. It actually made her quite nervous to see him do this on the narrow pathways of the ravine. "Your letters have already been sent to those of the south. Also some from last month had already passed away; their families were informed and asked to answer in their stead."

 _"You've taken to this task quite so, haven't you, Jin?"_

The simple reminder made him sheepishly grin. For a brief minute, he held to the reins of his horse as he actually watched the road and people ahead of them. "It's hard not to. It's a really good thing you do, Miss Kohaku."

 _"I do what I can."_

"But this?" Seijin asked raising the scroll with names after names of soldiers and their families on it. "If this is the amount you've got me doing for the past four months, I can't begin to imagine the numbers you've contacted over the years."

 _"They've been many, yes. But such endeavors usually pay themselves off."_

"Certainly, I believe this one would. After all, when so many soldiers go off to fight for their country, seldom any know their story. In the minds of the citizens—especially those of higher class—they are but faceless people who were doing right by their homeland." He turned to glance at her and smile. "To gather their accounts, catalog them, and revise them in order to eventually publish them once the wars are over...it's such a daunting task, truthfully." With a swift motion of his hands, he rolled the scroll back up to pack it. All the while his smile turned somewhat somber, he mounted the courage to ask his next question. "If I may ask, what gave you the idea to start such undertaking?"

Kohaku shrugged her shoulders at the question but her eyes lost quite some brightness as she lowered her gaze to the floor. Instinctively, she began stroking the mane of her mare to distract herself before answering. _"People die during war. It's just a fact. No one gets to know who, what, where, when, or how...they just do. And when they do, only their families remember them but after they're gone, what then? They're forgotten. And people who fight for what they believe is right shouldn't be forgotten. No matter their status—from the most royal to the mangiest of men—they all fight and die for the same cause. As such, they should be recognized and, most importantly, their sacrifice never forgotten."_

Seijin's expression came to mimic hers at reading these words. "Miss Kohaku, have you...lost someone like that to war?"

She didn't answer. Instead, she turned up to gaze at the broken backs of the Baisè. _"They have. And they'll be bitter and angry and sad. But if this somehow helps them understand what I have come to—what I_ still _struggle to understand...then I hope that it'll do someone some good."_

There wasn't anything else he could say. Frankly, he was speechless after such an explanation. One, dare he say, seemed rather genuine to just be something she'd gathered from her years as general. Whichever the case, he didn't dare ask. If anything had grown in him during the last five months of his working under her, it would be his respect and admiration for the woman he served.

 _"Everything all right?"_ she asked.

Seijin nodded with a warm smile. "Yes, miss. Everything is perfectly fine."

Thinking his answer odd but not wanting to ask about it, Kohaku returned her watchful eye to the Baisè. Despite the attacks, she still had to admit that the tribe held quite the numbers. And although nothing bad about it, it became a bit of a hassle to make sure they stuck to the mountain walls as they came to the narrowest trails of the ravine. Since it was the longest path before they reached wider roads, she had to constantly tell Seijin to remind them to keep closer to the walls. At times, she found herself galloping up to a group and ride beside them and keep them away from the edge.

It bothered her that she couldn't see Kouen or the others well enough from how long the line had turned as they crossed the road. She really hoped no one was being left behind. The sound of crackling thunder made her look up at the sky that had already began to darken as night approached. At least that had been her original thought until she noticed that she couldn't see the moon or stars because of the heavy, dark clouds that had rolled their way. It could've been just a thunderstorm; it didn't have to mean—

The thought hadn't even finished when she felt the slight prickling of rain hit her face. Lifting her face to look at the sky, she felt small drops at first that fell gently on her face. Those were just the warning, though. From afar, she heard the curtain of pouring rain that came rushing from behind that reached them in a flash. Cries of discomfort and amazement came to her ears all at once. They continued walking and tried their best to ignore it. But the more they did, the more she understood that this wasn't just a quick pour.

 _At least the drought's going to start going away._

A sudden high-pitched voice made her ears perk up and she turned to watch some feet ahead as a woman struggled with a kid. The girl, probably a year or two younger than Seijin, began to act out, not wanting to walk anymore from what she heard. Their cries rose over the pelting sound of rain; the girl was uncomfortable and tired. Kohaku glanced behind her at the space left and thought for a second. _A small ride won't hurt._ Having that in mind to help the woman, Kohaku slowly started making her way to them when a distinct sound reached her ears.

It was small and sharp but it had been different. She stopped her mare and lowered her head closer to the ground where she thought she heard it at first. Ignoring Seijin as he called her, Kohaku concentrated on the sound that had left as quickly as it came. Maybe...it'd been her imagination. But it came again and quickly left—it sounded like something...cracking. Her eyes widened when the cracking sound increased as more and more of the ground beneath them began to break.

 _The road's collapsing._

Not missing a beat, she signed the last two words at Seijin who quickly moved into action. "Everyone, hurry! The road's breaking beneath!" Despite not liking the chaos that ensued, Kohaku knew that they had to move faster than the granite beneath them broke. The rain...it must've unsettled the terrain. Soon the point came where she could easily hear and see the cracks that began to appear on the ground before parts of the ravine started to fall from the edge. Steadying her mare as she misstepped on a breaking piece of granite, Kohaku stroke her mane to calm her a moment before she heard the loudest crack yet. Lifting her gaze, she caught a glimpse of the ground shifting before a large chunk split the road and began sliding down with people struggling to stand as it fell.

 _"Seijin!"_

"Got it!"

Both jumped down from their steads and raced to the scared people as they scrambled to safety. Before anything, Kohaku summoned Beleth's staff before sweeping at the crowd, effectively pushing the ones she could towards more stable ground from further away. From there, the two worked on bringing people back up before the road completely collapsed underneath them. Kohaku could hear Seijin count under his breath as they put the people on safer ground and they scrambled after the rest of the party ahead.

"We're missing some!" Seijin called over the rain to her.

Kohaku scanned the falling ground until her eyes came to a woman—the same one from before, and she held the girl as she cried, scared. Not missing a beat, she climbed down and held both to either side of herself before jumping. The distance she got out of it wasn't much because of the excess weight but it was enough for the woman to reach Seijin's hand as he helped her up. Lighter now, Kohaku held the girl tightly with the hand that held her staff before making the jump to higher ground. Yet even with that close call, there was no time to rest.

"Miss Kohaku, hurry—" But over his cry for her to make haste, Kohaku heard the loudest crack of them all as the road collapsed beneath her feet and they began to fall. Seijin reacted and reached out to her. Hearing and seeing this, Kohaku stretched her hand out and felt Seijin's fingers just close enough to grasp. But when she tried closing her hand, it didn't respond. Her stark blue eyes widened and looked at Seijin's shocked expression a split second before they fell.

Her ears split with pain from screams of the girl she held in her arms as they dove down the ravine towards the forests below.

 _"Hastily, my king!"_

 _I know!_

Changing the staff from one hand to the other, she was about to strike down to soften their fall when she felt a blow to the back of her head. It came with such force that her hold on the staff came undone. It became hard to think but Marbas was fast enough to remind Kohaku of her presence. But her reactions were painstakingly slow as she djinn-equipped into Marbas just in time to cradle the girl in her grown form and take the full impact of the fall on her back. The moment her body made contact with the ground, all air left her lungs and her vision began to darken fast. In a split second, she felt nothing but cold and could hear the girl's cries before everything went black.

* * *

The path collapsed completely and left them no choice but to hurry on their way until they reached a wider trail of the mountain range. The people were screaming and crying in a panic that was quickly dying down as the veil of safety came over them. It wasn't until Kouen heard a woman's cries alongside Seijin's panicked shouts over the pouring rain that he turned towards the back where those exact two came running to where he and his Household Members were.

Dismounting his horse, he came down to meet them. The woman cried hysterics to other members of the tribe as they tried to calmed her down. Seijin was mumbling hysterics as well and it was extremely hard to understand him. It wasn't until Kouen caught the words "she fell" that he grabbed the young boy by the shoulders and shook him harshly.

"What happened?"

"M-Miss Kohaku." He frantically stared down at his hands and back at Kouen for a few seconds before continuing. "She had my hand. I-I thought she grabbed it but—she fell over as the trail collapsed. Her h-h-head." He reached the back of his own a split second before his face lost all color. "She hit her head as she fell down. B-Beleth—she let go of Beleth. S-She disappeared in the forest holding onto the girl."

"Girl?" he asked.

"Amira!" the woman cried. Kouen turned to look at the women; hey eyes were wide with fear, and her hands frantic unable to keep still. "She t-tried saving Amira but—Oh gods, please, save her."

Kouen clicked his tongue. Quickly he turned to give orders to his men, "Seishuu Ri, Kin Gaku, lead the men and Baisè to the battalion's encampment." They quickly acknowledged their orders and began to mobilize the unit.

He trailed behind them and Seijin quickly grabbed him by the arm. Although daring, Kouen couldn't miss the panic in his voice or shaking hands, "What about Miss—"

"We'll find her."

* * *

Buzzing. A tremendous buzzing and crying voice filled her already aching head the moment she opened her eyes.

 _"My king!"_

A hoarse sound came from her throat, a grunt, as she turned her head away from the pellets of rain that fell harshly on her face. Above their crying voices she could hear not only the rain that poured from above by also the rolling thunder as it clapped every so often. Her clothes stuck to her body as she slowly sat up yet cringed, feeling the throbbing pain that coursed through her whole body. Thinking was a pain too and she had to get up by herself since the little girl kept a few feet of distance between them as she huddled herself beneath a tree. The moment she tried standing, she had to kneel back down as her whole vision blurred and spiraled.

 _"You were out cold,"_ Marbas explained. _"You're not in any good shape right now. Get some cover."_

It shocked her that she had to ask Marbas to repeat what she'd said a couple of times over. Her mind was definitely not working well. The buzzing never left her ears but she could still hear the girl scared out of her mind. Weeping without restraint, the girl huddled closer to the tree trunk and shivered as Kohaku made her way towards her in a slow crawl. Once within reach, Kohaku tried reaching out to her but the girl coward against the tree, holding onto it for dear life. Kohaku tried calming her with quiet shushes while slowly reaching out again. The girl stared, petrified from the fall still, but gave her enough leeway to check her for injuries. Some bruises and cuts on her body, clothes torn and soaked but not any different than hers.

 _Good._

Shivering the girl reached her own hand out to touch Kohaku's face. "Y-You're red."

Red? Reaching her own hand up to her head, Kohaku flinched when she barely touched the back of it. Retrieving it, she saw the splotches of fresh blood washing away from the rain as it fell on her hand. _I'm bleeding...?_

 _"It's from the fall, my king, when you lost Beleth."_

 _Bele?_

Reaching up again, this time to her hair, she noticed it undone and sticking onto her whole body but didn't find a sign of the feathered pen. He was gone. The horrid thought of losing him was driven out when from above more piles of rock fell from the ravine. Hurrying as much as she could, Kohaku brought herself against the tree, putting the now screaming girl between herself and its trunk for protection. The floor shook from the numerous impacts that stopped after a brief moment.

 _"We can get him back later. You and the kid need to find somewhere safe to avoid what's falling from the mountains."_

 _We need to wait the pour out?_

The thought itself scared her. Beleth was out there, somewhere, and she needed to find him. Now.

 _"You can't."_ Marbas' statement made her mind stop that instant. _"You can't even stand. You need to rest and let the danger pass. You will find Beleth; we will once you're strong enough to at least weapon equip with me."_

Marbas wasn't wrong and it took Kohaku a few breaths to steady her anxiety and realize that. With Marbas' weapon equipped, she would be able to at least sniff out Beleth's presence. It would be a certain find then.

 _Yes, you're right. Thank you._

Willing herself up, Kohaku used the tree to stand despite the tremendous agony her whole body was in. She waited a few seconds for the dizziness to stop before she glanced down at the girl and reached her hand out to her. The girl, however, didn't let go of the tree, afraid. Encouraging her to leave would be hard, she was frightened and alone. Her mind hazily went through her options and found a good one. Not one she would ever have thought of doing again.

 _Just for now, though. Until this is all over._

She scanned the place, ensuring that they were alone before bending down a bit to the girl's level. The little girl's dark eyes dilated in fear but Kohaku only smiled and cleared her throat before opening her mouth. "My name's Kohaku. What's yours?"

The little girl gasped at hearing her speak and Kohaku couldn't blame her. Her voice, despite not being completely gone, was severely damaged. It certainly didn't sound like it had many years ago. It was hoarse, raspy, and far from dainty but at the very least it was intelligible. The girl took a few seconds to process what she'd said before answering, "A-Amira."

"Amira, that's a cute name." Kohaku reached her hands out and let Amira take them when she felt comfortable. Once she did, Kohaku smiled warmly despite the chattering of both their teeth. "Amira, we need to look for a place to hide from the rain. Think you can help me with that?"

"B-But what about—" A thunder struck just as she looked up towards the ravine where they had just fallen.

Kohaku shook her head and stroke Amira's head. "I'll get you back, I promise. But I need to rest a little bit first. Can you help me?"

It must've done something to calm her down because Amira nodded timidly before getting up and coming to hug Kohaku's leg instead. The sudden hit made her dizzy again but once it settled, she smiled glad to have gotten through to her before the two started looking for some kind of shelter. Amira found one quickly enough, a small opening of caves some way from where they were. As she helped Kohaku there, Kohaku could hear the sound of the nearby river flowing rapidly. It must be picking up pace with the rain that was pouring. Once inside, Amira helped Kohaku down to sit before she reached out for Amira. Seeing her shake so much told her that the poor thing was freezing in her drenched clothes. If there was anything she was able to do, it'd be keep each other warm.

Amira curled up against Kohaku and she brought her arms around the girl to hold her close. It wasn't until she tried stroking her head to calm her that Kohaku noticed her right hand unresponsive. Her fingers were curled inward and her palm cramped. No matter what she did, her hand wouldn't undo itself. Could it be the hit from her head when she fell? Going back to that, she tried rebuilding her memories of the last few moments before the fall.

They were transporting the Baisè. It began to rain. The trail began to crumble beneath them. She and Seijin went to help and the road collapsed beneath her when she tried saving Amira. Seijin had reached down—her hand hadn't closed.

Her eyes came back to her crumpled hand finding that common factor she missed in the heat of the moment. Her hand hadn't responded. It hadn't grabbed onto Seijin's. And now it wasn't opening up anymore. Paralyzed, it seemed. The wind from outside sped up and swept inside the cave, making it howl loudly like a beast. Frightened by the sudden sound, Amira snuggled closer against Kohaku, her body shaking much more fiercely than before. Kohaku held her closer and rubbed her hands against her tiny arms, trying to keep her warm. At first she thought there was nothing to do to keep her from being scared but thinking again brought her an idea.

"Do you like dogs, Amira?"

The little girl, teeth chattering, lifted her gaze to meet Kohaku's. After a moment, she answered. "Yeah. Puppies and kitties are cute."

"They are. Do you have any?"

Amira shook her head. "Thelma won't let us have any pets. She says—it's already hard enough to take care of us."

The sentence confused Kohaku a bit. "You must have a lot of siblings then."

"I-I don't."

"But you said—"

"The other kids aren't my brothers or sisters," Amira corrected her. "They're just other kids. They're like me. We don't have families anymore. My uncle went to fight when the bad people attacked us. All the kids got put with Thelma until they came back. A lot of them didn't; Uncle didn't, either." The serious nonchalantness that she said it with made Kohaku gasp and instinctively hold her tighter. The little girl didn't complain, but tighten the hold on Kohaku's clothes.

"Amira, you're on your own then."

It wasn't a question. Just a crude statement of the truth and by the time she realized what she had said, Kohaku hated herself for saying it. Amira, however, didn't seem bothered by it. "Yeah, I am." Her tiny hands held her tighter until her knuckles turned white. "But I'm not sad anymore. I got past that sometime after Thelma told me. I cried a lot but—the elder told us that he's in a better place where they're never hungry or thirsty or hurt. A place where they're happy and waiting for us. Do you think he told us the truth?"

"I do think so," Kohaku replied after giving it some thought. When silence came over them, Kohaku became worried when she couldn't feel shivering anymore from the little girl. Glancing down, she saw Amira, eyes closed and breathing slow. "Amira, Amira," she repeated while shaking the little girl. "Amira, please, don't fall asleep. Wake up, Amira!" It took her that last shake for the girl to wake up a bit groggy before she started shivering again, her teeth chattering.

"I'm...sleepy, miss," Amira mumbled, her eyelids drooping.

"I know you are, but you can't fall asleep. Stay with me, okay?" Kohaku said a bit fast between her own chattering teeth. She couldn't let her fall asleep. Amira had already been in a poor diet and with how low her body temperature was the kid wouldn't handle sleep in her condition. She had to keep her awake. "Tell me more about your uncle."

"Uncle?" Amira repeated.

"Yes," Kohaku replied, smiling. She undid her the cloak she'd been wearing and placed it over Amira's body to keep the breeze away from the girl. Even damp, it could serve some purpose. "What did you two use to do together?"

"He'd take me hunting." Amira's grasp lessened but came back at intervals the more Kohaku moved around. "He was a very good warrior. He taught me how to use a bow and arrow."

"Really?" Kohaku asked, intrigued. "Did he take you out often?"

Amira nodded. "A lot of times. We caught a deer once."

"Wow," Kohaku said a little out of breath as she began to raise with Amira still in her arms.

When Amira noticed her rise from her sit, she glanced up at Kohaku. "Where are we going?"

"Out, Amira." Kohaku leaned back against the wall of the cave for a second to get her bearings and calm her dizziness. "We have to go out and search for something of mine to get us out of here."

"That weird..." Amira stopped mid sentence but her own chattering teeth woke her up again, "That weird stick?"

"Yes, my staff. But it's not a stick anymore, it's a feather." Kohaku struggled the first few steps she took towards the mouth of the cave but managed to reach. Even if the pace was slow, it would have to do. She felt a tiny bit better and even in her state it would have to be enough to find Beleth with Marbas. But as soon as she tried walking without much of anything to support herself with, she tumbled to her knees.

 _"You can't search for Beleth and carry the girl, my king."_

"Amira." The girl lifted her head painfully slow and it worried Kohaku. "Can you walk, sweetie?"

Amira nodded slowly and when Kohaku let her on her feet she stumbled a few steps before standing up by herself. Instantly her hands went around herself as she began shivering and her teeth chattering. Kohaku thanked her, telling her she was being a really brave girl before she herself got up. Taking Amira by the hand, she took the girl out with her as they began to search for Beleth.

Marbas instantly helped her with a small weapon equip, long enough to sniff the feather's general direction out. Her head a muddied mess, Kohaku had to concentrate hard to know where she was going. "It's a red feather, Amira. We need to find it to get us out of here."

"O-Okay," the girl replied before turning every which way in search of the feather under the pouring rain. It was unbelievable that the storm hadn't subsided yet. Kohaku had been wrong to have labeled it as a mere warning pour. It meant to start the end of the drought. Their pace, although halting, soon brought them near the roaring river that overflowed out of its banks at a high speed.

"Be careful."

Amira nodded at the warning before the two started inspecting the terrain for her Metal Vessel. The loud thunder disrupted the drumming of the rain an instant before they heard a different kind of cracking. This time a tree that had been bashed against by the river's aggressive flow finally gave way and fell across it, making a path through the ferocious water snake. Kohaku drew back at the sound but slid and fell back to a sit, hissing at the agony a sheer fall like that caused her. Closing her eyes to bear with it as her breath hitched, Kohaku failed to hear Amira's shout over the rain.

Before she knew it, Amira had let go of her hand and ran in the direction of the fallen oak. Kohaku tried getting up but the quicker she did the faster it seemed she fell back down. Opting to shout as loud as she could with her hoarse voice, Kohaku began yelling for Amira to come back. The little girl didn't listen and Kohaku finally saw why as she stared at the crown of the fallen tree. Miraculously, her feathered pen stuck out like a sore thumb, red among the leaves. But her anxiety shot through the roofs when she caught sight of the little girl climbing onto the fallen trunk, anchoring herself with her arms and legs as she slid towards the other side to the feather. In a sporadic attempt to reach her, Kohaku tried getting up only to fall again and again with every step she took. Agony and worry wrenched her gut as she watched Amira finally reach the crown of the tree, her little arms stretched out to touch the feather. She took a foot onto a branch before jumping to get the feather but in doing so the branch broke off, letting Amira fall into the river as it clashed against her tiny body and swept her under.

Kohaku's heart stopped. Not wasting a breath and ignoring all she had in her, she jumped into the river and quickly began getting swept away as well. Unable to move much as one of her legs had already become numb, Kohaku opened her eyes to find Amira; the little girl, despite her tiredness, managed to grab onto a lose root. Using the river's momentum, she managed to move herself just in place to catch Amira in her arms. Kicking the best she could with one leg, she brought both their heads above water. The moment she did that she felt something puncture her hard on her back as Amira wrapped her arms around her neck to anchor herself. Reaching behind herself, she managed to grab Beleth's metal vessel in her good hand.

 _"My king!"_

She'd never been happier to hear his voice. "Djinn of Vainglory and Champions—"

 _"But my king, your body can't—"_

Kohaku struggled to kick herself to the surface as the river swept them further downstream. The moment she broke the surface again, she yelled at the top of her lungs. "Just do it!" The second the river swept her out again, she felt the familiar warmth of Beleth's powers as they surrounded her and enveloped her completely in her djinn equip. Recognizing the wooden surface of her sound staff, she took all the strength she could muster to kick out against the water. The particles vibrated and pulsed back with tenfold of the intensity, propelling them out of the river and high, high up in the air, over the forests.

Her arm with the crumpled hand starting to give way as well, she shouted for Amira to hold as tight as she could. The girl did but weakly and Kohaku focused her vision the best she could until she found blurred lights not far. As gravity began to take her down again, she created a crescent wall of air to let her feet touch. Her right leg dragged along but her left bent low and was enough to let her use at least one ability.

 _Dajij 'Aghlal._

Her feet, hands, and staff were surrounded by circlets of bright green light a second before she propelled herself at high speeds towards the clearing.

* * *

This whole situation was beginning to upset Kouen. After having the Baisè safely allocated further in with proper care and shelter, he mobilized the leftover units for the search. He and Koumei remained behind having to deal with two things at the same time and instead sent out soldiers along with Seishuu Ri and Kin Gaku. But the more the soldiers and his own Household Members returned without sighting either Kohaku or the Baisè girl she'd gone to rescue, the more something festered in him.

"Anything?" he asked a bit impatiently at Koumei who was at standby with the magicians that converged their split search parties.

"No," Koumei replied. Although hiding it, Koumei pursed his lips in concern. "Her vassal said she suffered some kind of head injury. Do you think her capable of moving around as she is?"

"With the Baisè girl with her? Yes." Kouen had the suspicion that that folly of Kohaku's reared it's ugly head again as it'd done to make her risk her life so rashly for the kid. And if he knew anything of that idiotic flaw of hers, then he was more than sure that she'd try something stupid if it safeguarded the girl with her. And that would just make their search harder. "Have Seishuu Ri and Kin Gaku search down the river as well, it could've swept them—"

"General Commander!" Both princes turned at hearing Seijin's shout as he rushed through the opening of their encampment. Out of breath, Seijin could only repeat "she's here" over and over before darting back out. Not missing a beat, Kouen and Koumei followed with Koumei mobilizing the unit of healers they'd kept at bay. They followed the boy close to the mountain's edge where, from afar, Kouen could just see a speck of red. At first, he couldn't distinguish her and it wasn't until they were a few feet away that he saw Beleth's djinn equip on Kohaku.

Hair red as hellfire was held up into an adorned bun high on the back of her head that let long tresses of it run free down to her hips. Thin ram horns curled up once around on either side of her head, the tips pointed slightly upward forming a circlet-like silhouette that was adorned in blooming white lilies. Her upper body was mostly bare; the white doric chiton that she wore was loose on her chest and loosely wrapped around her arms, leaving her shoulders, collar bone, and the top of her breasts bare with the rest falling down against her arms. Thin chains of gold wrapped around her neck freely, the loosest one having a bright diamond-shaped ruby that rested just between her breasts. Two medals held the silk, loose fabric against her chest attached a bit below her shoulders, leaving her back down to her tail bone exposed. The skirt of the tunic was skewed in length and reached just below her thighs with her left one slightly barer. A transparent sarong of gold and red hues was wrapped around her hips, a belt of golden hoops hinging on them, and the fabric flowing down to her ankles. Both her arms and feet were bare except for gold bands around her forearms and dangling around her ankles. Against her gold sash that hovered around her, white lilies, along with other white buds, adorned it.

All was matted tight against her drenched body as she leaned against her sound staff, one of her legs languidly being dragged along. Curiously enough, no more rain touched them as the vibrations from her staff created a sphere that simply toppled the water droplets off. Her eyes dazed and dilated kept blinking until she narrowed them to see them—no, she made direct eye contact with him. Instantly, she began taking steps towards him and Kouen noticed the distinct path her vibrations were making. Every step she took flatten a small pit beneath them, leaving behind nothing but pulverized granite in the hole.

Seijin was the first to burst through the crowd and attempt to reach her but bounced back at meeting the edge of her sphere. Kouen was surprised, to say the least, that she'd purposely kept her vassal away. Her paces were getting slower but she was still determined to reach him. So instead he cut the distance short and walked the steps that separated them. Curiously, she allowed him through the barrier of sound; he felt the popping of his ears the moment he came through and closer to her.

"General." But she didn't respond. Instead she forcefully shoved the girl towards him making him catch her in his arms. Before he could even inquire about her actions, he barely caught the sound of a hoarse voice.

"...heal her."

The initial shock wore off quickly enough before he reached up to the little girl's neck to find a barely palpable pulse. Not missing the stride of what she'd meant by bringing her to him, Kouen drew out his sword and with the hilt facing the Baisè girl, let Phenex's metal vessel fall directly onto the little girl's chest. Summoning her powers, the wings of the coral-colored bird spread out before cradling the body of the young child. Within seconds, some warmth returned to Amira's body as she began shivering fiercely once more. She took a deep breath before her eyes groggily opened, turning to face Kohaku who was smiling back.

"I found...your feather." Innately, her tiny hands reached to take hold of whatever was closest and grasped the metal ornament that rested on her body.

Kohaku nodded a few times, her crumpled hand brushing the hair away from her face. "...thank you, Amira." He'd heard the hoarse voice again and this time, despite its volume just shy of a whisper, he knew its origin.

Amira weakly smiled before fainting, her breathing back to normal despite the shivering. Unable to keep standing any longer, Kohaku fell to her knees, her djinn equip completely vanishing in a burst of golden dust. Kouen immediately called for the healers, that took the girl from him first. Before they even had time to reach her though, Kouen felt the tight grasp she took of his cloak making him hastily turn her way. What he heard genuinely disturbed him. Kohaku was gasping loudly but it didn't sound right. Bending down to get a better view, he lifted her face to see her grasping desperately at her throat, only breathless urgent gasps coming.

"Damn." Not waiting for them, he picked her up and took her himself to the healers' quarters as they followed just a few steps behind. All the while, he kept hearing the horrible breathless gasps she took along with the incessant scratching at her throat. Lying her down, he took his sword and summoned Phenex once more. The coral-colored wings cradled her this time but the horrid gasping of hers wasn't going away. "Phenex!"

 _"It's noxious, my king,"_ she quickly explained as she continued to work. _"It's foreign to her body and it's taking longer to get rid of."_

But thankfully, as soon as she had finished that sentence, Kohaku took the biggest gasp of air that she managed to get. She panted heavily but it seemed that at least now she could breathe properly. Drawing back, he ordered the healers to examine her. With their orders given, they went to work with it while giving him a count of the injuries she'd sustained. Head injury, some external cuts and wounds, fever, cold exposure, and numb or stiff extremities. It baffled the healers to find such distinct symptoms on her, especially when they didn't seem to connect to one another.

 _"It's the noxious material I found in her body, King Kouen,"_ Phenex said. _"The fever from the exposure triggered the extreme effects of it: the stiffness of muscles and the paralysis that came over her internal organs."_

 _You're telling me she was poisoned?_

 _"Yes, my king."_ Kouen quickly informed them of what Phenex had found and they acted quickly, having some antidotes at hand for what she'd described to him. _"From the signs of her body, it seemed it had been coursing through her veins in very miniscule amounts for at least twenty-four hours already. As is, if they had taken their intended course through her body, she would have experienced limb paralysis or at the very least impaired control of her extremities."_

It explained what he remembered Seijin telling him; she hadn't grabbed his hand back then because she couldn't. _What else?_

 _"Whatever occurred during her endeavors after the fall must have aggravated the toxin even in its small amounts. In its full dosage, it could have very well shut down her entire system, effectively causing a swift albeit painful death."_

He mulled over that bit of information until the healers informed him that the antidotes had worked and her muscles had begun to relax which meant that whichever had been the affected organs had already began to relax as well. Ordering them to attend to her and the girl, he exited the tent. The rain had come to a soft drizzle outside and Koumei was managing the situation with the Baisè still. His household members accompanied him along with Seijin but the boy had a more than blanched expression on his face. Coming up to him, Kouen allowed him to leave. Seijin thanked him before he rushed away towards the healers' tent.

Koumei finished his briefing to the soldiers before turning to his brother, "Is she—"

"Yes," Kouen replied. He turned to Seishuu Ri and Kin Gaku before sending them off to prepare the Baisè for departure. Once alone with Koumei, he continued, "She was poisoned."

The second prince's first thought was the Baisè but he quickly withdrew that possibility. Kohaku knew to always cordially decline any offer of food when negotiating; it'd been a lesson he taught her himself. But then...how?

It took his brother adding more information to help him delve on that question further. "Phenex found that it already had time to course through her body."

This interested Koumei greatly. "For how long?"

"A day."

A day? Koumei quickly found his answer then. "She ingested it at the palace." Koumei tapped his chin with his fan, mulling over the information. "That's disconcerting."

"Very," Kouen agreed. "Ensure protocol is followed on that end when we return."

"Of course, my brother and king." Koumei hesitated for a second before asking, "Will she be informed about it?"

"Not of what's to follow; the less she knows, the easier it will be to find who's responsible." Kouen sighed in frustration. This was supposed to be an fairly easy mission for them all and it turned out to uncover some more dirty secrets back home. "Inform me when she's regained consciousness. I'll question her myself on the matter."

But the poisoning was only one of the things he truly wanted to ask about. The other, well...he had questions to ask this "mute" woman.

* * *

At first Kohaku saw nothing but white. It wasn't until her vision cleared that she noticed she was under shelter, a tent. Not only that but she felt warm and her ears weren't buzzing as loudly anymore. Her head still ached, though, and it made her dizzy again when she tried to sit up.

"Easy there." Hearing the familiar voice, she turned slightly to see Seijin as he stood up from his place to help her sit up. Once done, he noticed the puzzled expression on her face and it made him smile. "You made it back safely with Amira, Miss Kohaku. Both of you have been treated and are recuperating well. You're at the encampment on the other side of the mountain range." Knowing her usual routine, he took the small box he had within reach and placed it on her lap. "Both metal vessels are safe and sound as well." Kohaku breathed a sigh of relief.

Testing her hands, Kohaku made her hands into fists before undoing them, once then twice. Nothing felt out of order. With that certainty, he signed his way. _"How long have I been out?"_

"Only a day."

Seijin came up from his sit and began attending to the injuries she did have that were still healing. The puncture wound from Beleth's pen on her back was well. As for the head injury, it seemed to have been just a contusion. The blunt force would have made it hard for her to move or even keep her balance according to him. That explained much to her. All the while he did this, he briefed her on what she'd missed the day she'd been unconscious. So far, the Baisè had already signed their surrender to the Kou Empire. It seemed that after the show of rescue for Amira, the chieftain had changed his mind about her at least. Kohaku could say that was a win on as far as she was concerned. The tribe would be transferred with transfer magic circles once everybody was in condition to move. It seemed that would take place later that day since they were only waiting on a few people, herself included.

"Also, some soldiers came by." At Kohaku's puzzled expression, he elaborated "Some of the northern battalion had been stationed here with us without our knowledge. Their letters arrived a few hours ago and they had wanted to give their testimony in person to you. I took it in the end since you weren't in the best of shape to talk."

 _"Thank you, Seijin."_ Everything seemed fine from what he saw and she thanked him again for it. Turning to the bed beside hers, she caught sight of Amira sleeping soundly in the healers' tent. _"Is she doing all right?"_

"Same as you when you both got here: fever from exposure, some cuts and bruises, and disorientation when she woke up. Apart from that, she only needs rest." Seijin went over to check on the girl when asked and sat between the two beds as he continued their conversation. "She asked about you when she first woke."

 _"Did she?"_

He nodded. "She asked about you, said thanks, then passed out again. Must be tired, the poor thing. Her caretaker came by as well wanting to thank you for saving her."

 _"Thelma's her name, I think."_ At the reminder, Kohaku signed out at Seijin, _"Remember that other list I had you compile?"_

"Other list—you mean the endowments?" Kohaku nodded and signed away at what she wanted him to do. They were quite a few rearrangements he'd have to do on that ledger with what she asked. "Are you certain about this? You're already endorsing two; a third could greatly cut into not only your supply but theirs as well."

 _"I'll figure a way to raise those numbers to make it even between the three without cutting on any end."_

That was a solution, sure, but Seijin had his doubts. Doubts that quickly disappeared when he saw that cheeky grin on his master's face. "All right, I'll do them."

 _"Now."_

"Now?"

Her smiled widened as she nodded. _"They'll need the help once they get instated into our city and the one there is plenty full to make any more accommodations for them. Can you make do with the hours we have left here?"_

"You have too much faith in my abilities," he joked with a scoff.

 _"I have faith enough. I know you can do it, Jin. It'll be easy!"_

The enthusiasm she put on it made him chuckle and shake his head before agreeing. "And I'm not one to disappoint, am I? I'll go ahead and get started but I'll come around from time to time to see how you both are doing," he commented before he got up from his seat and headed out.

Kohaku watched his retreating back and only after he was gone did she lean back against the small backrest of the bed. But whatever peace of mind she thought she could have quickly vanished when she heard a ruckus coming from outside. It wasn't that loud which told her that despite the slight buzzing, her ears had returned to normal. The voices were still indistinguishable, so it wasn't until Kouen walked in that she knew who it was. For once, his expression held a hint of something she seldom saw on him; it was akin to annoyance bordering anger or perhaps discontent spiraling down to frustration. Whichever one it was, it clearly wasn't good.

 _"Your highness—"_ she stopped in the midst of her signing when she clearly heard him click his tongue. Annoyance; it was annoyance bordering anger. His strides led him to the foot of her bed and before she could even sign anything he spoke leaving no room for discussion.

"Speak."

The mere command—so forceful and demanding—left her a bit confused. Wanting to relate that, she raised her hands again. _"I can't—"_ But he clicked his tongue again and that attitude began infecting her as well. Frowning, she tried signing again to finish her sentence, _"You know I can't speak."_ Without saying a word, Kouen took the few strides it took to get to the side of her bed before grabbing both of her smaller hands in his. She tried pulling them away but he kept his hold and simply glared her way.

"I won't repeat myself again: _Do not_ lie to my face."

Red eyes tinted gold glared at her own bright blue and she couldn't stray away from them. Her mind raced with thoughts as to how he could be so adamant about her speaking. It wasn't until she briefly recalled landing near the encampment after finding Beleth that ideas starting coming to mind. She wasn't sure whether she had actually asked him for his help verbally. From what she remembered, everything was blurry and toned out. What she had cared about then was getting Amira the help she needed—if she actually spoke, she didn't recall.

 _But he's not faltering. He's sure of what he's accusing me of._

And that gave her at least some semblance of an answer. Her head turned slightly to Amira who was still asleep and her eyes trailed behind him subtlety making sure no one would hear her this time.

"...I can explain." This time Kouen's frustration was blatant as he brusquely let go of his hold on her hands. Kohaku didn't hesitate then when she saw him with the intent to leave. "No, please don't."

Letting his emotions simmer, he stopped and turned to face her. "Explain yourself."

Kohaku's fingers trailed up to her throat to her scar before swallowing hard. "I couldn't speak...after the incident. It came back like this after a while and it hurts when I speak."

"Magicians could have healed it. If not fully, they could have made it easier to speak if you would have been treated. Why not seek them?"

At that question, Kohaku pursed her lips. He was prying in business she didn't want to dwell in. As it was, she was already on thin ice with him knowing.

 _"My king, please,"_ Beleth pleaded. _"Tell him the truth."_

 _I can't...if I do—_

"Answer me this instant."

The sheer tone of his voice frightened her but she had to answer with something. "I hadn't wanted it fixed so I didn't tell anybody about it returning. It's for the best...if I don't speak."

"It's best?" Kouen's intrigue on her choice of words didn't go unchecked by Kohaku. Damn, she forgot for an instant that every word she spoke would be highly scrutinized by him. For whatever reason— _anger at being lied to, of everyone being lied to—_ he was adamant to have the truth. "Did someone compel you not to get treatment?"

Kohaku vehemently shook her head urgently trying to dispel his doubts but failing miserably. "It was mine. I decided not to." Instead of letting herself be led by the collar into an even deeper hole, she opted to act herself. "There was no point in restoring it when no one listened. Might as well be as subservient as they made me out to be."

He scoffed at this and came back to the side of the bed. "You are impulsive, you are voluble even without speaking, and you have the most non-existent instinct of self-preservation I have ever seen on any person. Where you are concerned, subservient isn't exactly the word I would use."

"Then we'll agree to disagree." Those words were out of her before she even realized it and it made her covers her lips with her fingers. She was so used to having to sign without having her every thought spill that it was happening now inadvertently. "Besides what does it matter? I've done my job fine without it."

"That isn't the issue." Kouen sighed, his irritation seemingly faltering as he thought over things. "Regardless of the reasons, there will be a need to question your family. If not about your voice then about—"

"You ca—" The sudden raspy screech of her voice and the loud thud that came after brought his attention back to her. Kohaku cursed under her breath as she tried getting up by herself but her legs, weak as they still were, weren't responding. Even using the bed to lean on wasn't enough to pull herself up as her arms gave way as well. Cursing again, she was determined to rise and stop him but she didn't need to move much before his shadow came over her. Lifting her gaze, she saw him bending down to grab her left arm against his own and reaching for her right hand to help her back up. Embarrassed of being so feeble but needing the help nonetheless, Kohaku held onto his arm and hand as he helped her back up. Kouen felt her whole body shaking from forcing her body to remain upright even with his help; the poison, despite being mostly gone, had left powerful effects on her system. Despite that he still felt the light grasp she took on his arm and hand before looking up at him with a determined gaze. "Please don't inform them. I'll do whatever I have to but they can't find out."

Kouen heard the slight shakiness of her voice or perhaps it had just been the hoarseness getting offhand with her talking so much. Whichever the case was, he heard the same kind of emotions he saw flourish many times before when he looked at her in the eye or paid attention to her body language. Determined would be an understatement but he couldn't think of any other word to describe what he saw before him. And it only ignited his curiosity further as to what made her be so on edge.

"Does this have to do with whomever poisoned you?"

"Poison?"

Her voice shook again and he plainly heard her shock and confusion. Kouen helped her sit back down at the edge of the bed before continuing with the conversation. And it was one that they needed to have for information she might have. "Poison was found running through your system. It's cleared but it had time to course."

Kohaku looked askance, her hands opening and closing as if remembering the sensation of numbness again at the mere mention. "But...it's gone?"

"All you're feeling now must be side-effects of it exiting your body," he informed her. "Have you noticed any suspicious activity around you?"

She shook her head languidly before her arms came up around herself. "No. I haven't."

The answer itself created turmoil in him. The woman he saw before him clearly was scared but it was hard to decipher what had her that way. Was it the fact that someone had poisoned her or that she actually knew more than she was telling him? If he knew something about this woman was that if he badgered her the right way, she'd cave in but that was the last thing he wanted to do to her in her condition. Not to mention that badgering a woman for answers wasn't what he wanted to do in the least.

But he still did have a quarrel to resolve with her. "You shouldn't let what others think about you or what they do control you to such degree." When she lifted her gaze with a perplexed frown, he elaborated. "You said you didn't want your voice back since no one listened. That's a petty excuse to run away from your problems."

"What can you possibly know about that?" The moment she spoke that, her hands came up to cover her mouth. Like before, he noted how much more truthful she'd become without any physical reign to keep her down. It fired her and brought something new to her. At least new in terms that _he_ hadn't seen before.

"Enough to plainly see you running from them. Without a voice to speak you avoid clear confrontations with deceitful smiles and cordialities. You're far too boisterous to be even remotely satisfied with whatever results that gets you." Kohaku opened her mouth to protest but after a few seconds to think about it, she closed it back up with a slight frown. "Unlike your siblings, you think and act according to what's in front of you, moved by what problems you think most important." He'd seen plenty of that when she put so much importance to her siblings or to his own. She was moved to action and thought when it moved her emotions.

It's what made her an exceptional human being but clearly left things to be desired for her as a general amidst war.

"You could do best with a voice of your own to speak with, both figuratively and literally." This confused her once more but he expected such. After all, he had already made his mind all the while she'd been recovering. "You came here to be tested and I have seen, for the most part, what you are capable of. Although you lack experience in some aspects, you are qualified to lead an army and strategize on your own."

The instant he said those words he couldn't believe how large her eyes became, a slight glint shimmering in her stark blue eyes. "...are you saying—"

"I didn't finish." Kouen allowed her to calm down before continuing. "I am ready to give your father that recommendation. In exchange, I want to amend the terms I had laid in the beginning."

"Amend them how?"

"Let healers treat you."

This certainly perplexed her enough to speak. "I don't think..." she gulped, trying to alleviate the burning sensation. "It's too damaged and it's been far too long since I got injured. It must be scarred past the point of curing it with remedies."

"Then let me treat you with Phenex."

Kohaku shook her head adamant on his stand. "Why are you so insistent?"

"Do I need a reason?"

"Yes," she declared with a glare. "It's my body you are fiddling with. And prince or not, I have a right to have a say in what's done to me and why."

Persistent herself, he thought, but he understood. That didn't mean his answer had to be 100% truthful. "You have potential and it's exploitable. Is that good enough?"

"No." She sighed, however, as if defeated. "But I can tell when I'm fighting a losing battle. You're as stubborn as I am or so Koumei tells me." She covered her mouth again—a tattletale he'd learned in the extent of their conversation to figure she hadn't meant to say that aloud—before shaking her head and redirecting the conversation back. "If you treating me is what it takes for this to remain between us then I'll do it."

"You agree?" he asked incredulous that it had been that easy.

That ticked her off a bit. "Unlike any idea you may have, I learned to recognize when I've been cornered and have to back down. Regrettably that happens more often with you than I'd like to admit."

"That is fine by me." The ruckus that came from outside brought their attentions and made him heave a sigh. "For the meanwhile, we'll wait for the Baisè and for you to recover."

"The healers said I only need a day or so to recover the strength in my body," she told him.

"We'll have most of the tribe moved by then. Focus on resting so you can mobilize the last of the troops by tomorrow's end."

Kouen started heading out with that in mind but before he could leave he heard the faintest 'thank you' before leaving the tent. He didn't know what there was to thank him for. The only thing he had done was blackmail, exploit, and harass her to accept his terms. Even he wasn't sure if she'd been smart in accepting a mere recommendation as her father's second-in-command in exchange; to him, it wasn't worth the payment she'd have to give. Then again she didn't seem as oblivious about what he meant as he thought she'd be. Kohaku seemed to understand all he had told her. A question she'd poised, though, lingered quietly at the back of his mind.

 _"Why are you so insistent?"_

If he had to be truthful, he partially didn't know. Of course he knew that having her at her best, both as a general and Metal Vessel user, would be better for his plans on expanding to the west. It was why he'd trained her himself, why he allowed Koumei to teach her as well. It also explained why he wanted to figure out who poisoned her; she was a valuable asset that he couldn't afford to lose. Then there were the parts he didn't understand. In his mind, he couldn't understand why he'd let his anger fester when he found out she'd lied about being unable to speak. The other thing he didn't understand even more was that he'd offer Phenex to heal her. Had it been any other case, he would've been satisfied with whatever the healers were capable of doing and not prod any further on the issue. With her, while he hadn't lied about knowing that if given a louder voice to speak with, she would become a mightier asset, he also knew it didn't just boil down to that.

The worst part was that he knew it but couldn't define it. And that really bothered him.

* * *

In all certainty, Kohaku had gotten much better with the treatment and a day's rest. Dawn at its peak, she got herself dressed noticing no one was there to bother her. Once ready with both Beleth and Marbas on her person, she headed out. True to his word, most of the Baisè were already gone with only some few tents left, some of which were soldiers left behind to serve under her command. If anything, only a few families were left and they would be left to transfer back to the city. That would be a job that landed on her along with preparing the small group of soldiers that would remain behind to await further orders on what would happen with their new acquired territory.

"Miss Kohaku." Turning, she found Seijin running up to her with a smile on his face and scrolls in his arms. "It's so good to see you up and about again."

 _"It feels good to be up and about again."_ She gave the place a final look around before she took one large breath. _"All right, Jin. Tell me what's this beast I've got to tackle today."_ Pride and happiness brimming of off his smile, he began detailing all that needed to be done by the day's end to officially finish the expedition. Both princes had left with the majority of the battalion and Baisè back into the city in order to accommodate them there. The few still recovering where hers to relocate along with the troops she had prepared.

"The load doesn't seem heavy, though," Seijin commented before turning to her with concern etched on his face. "Are you sure you are well enough to do this?"

 _"No problem. I feel excellent. Let's get the people and prepare channels ready to get them going, yeah?"_

Seijin couldn't help but be infected by the giddiness that his master overflowed with. It certainly helped during the half day it took to get all things in order. Seijin took the Baisè and readied them while Kohaku got the troops to place the perimeter necessary for what would come next to happen as swiftly as possible. The few times he came to her was to verify where the tribe was to stay and before they knew it, they returned to the Rakushou. Because of some issues still left to do, they still had to stay in the area where they had established them to put some things in order. So for the time being they were patrolling the streets of that small place.

 _"Have they all been given proper shelter and necessities?"_ Kohaku asked as they strolled through the area where the Baisè now walked freely.

"Yes and yes," Seijin affirmed, checking things on his meticulous lists. Putting those away he came to take another scroll out. "Also, I managed to put the endowments the way you asked me, Miss Kohaku. The orphan houses in Shika and Rakushou will be fine financially and although it will cumber more cost for its construction, the second house in Rakushou will be done by week's end. For the time being they will remain in separate housing."

 _"Well done. I knew you could do it."_

"Wasn't easy," Seijin added with a wry smile. "Also, there's a meeting this afternoon for you and the rest of your siblings."

Kohaku turned a bit confused about that but before she got the time to ask, she heard the fast pace of tiny feet coming her way. Turning about to see what it was, Kohaku got taken aback when a small child tackled her. Thankfully she had the time to hold her own and avoid falling but the sudden attack left her confused.

"Lady!"

 _That voice..._

Glancing down, Kohaku met Amira's gentle gaze and toothy smile as the little girl grabbed on the skirts of her ruqun. There was no helping the grin that came to Kohaku as she bent down to pick the girl up to hold her tightly. The laughter that rang through was infectious to Seijin as he saw the two from a small distance. Kohaku finally put her down and signed at Seijin to translate.

"How are you, Amira?"

The girl stared at Seijin and then at Kohaku perplexed by the action. But Kohaku simply laid a finger on her lips before she mimicked closing her lips shut. The gesture didn't alleviate any of her confusion but she went with it and answer Kohaku while not even looking at Seijin. "I'm good. Much better too!"

"That's good to hear." Seeing the opportunity, Kohaku asked about their stay. "How are you liking it here so far?"

"It's okay," she said with a puff of her cheeks. She brushed her hands against the green clothes that covered her now, her grimace showing some discomfort. "The clothes are kind of weird. I don't really like green."

Kohaku wouldn't argue with her on that. Green wasn't a suitable color in her opinion either. Especially when it denoted where she stood in society. Not wanting to drop such huge load of information on such young kid, she opted to ask about other things. "What about where you're living now?"

"Oh!" Amira, instantly perked up and the smile returned to her face. "It's a little cramp because all of us are living there but Thelma says we're going to get a new home soon. And it's gonna be just for us!"

"I sure hope you like it then."

"Yeah, I can't wait to see it." Amira jumped a bit and reached out to grab Kohaku's hand before dragging her away.

"B-But the meeting—" Seijin begin to protest as he followed behind them but Kohaku quieted him, signing that a few minutes wouldn't hurt. Amira led them to an old home around the area. Although Kohaku knew it wasn't suitable for housing a large amount of children, she figured that it'd be enough for the week until the new home was finished building. The thing was that when she thought of large she imagined maybe ten or fifteen children. What she found inside was a little more than that.

Amira dragged them into the home without announcment and brought them to the living room where most of the kids were playing. Kohaku and Seijin both gasped at the sheer amount. Seijin counted under his breath before turning to her once more. "Thirty-four. That's odd; I could've sworn I counted twenty-three when I first allocated them here." With that question in mind, he turned to Amira. "Did more kids come in?"

She nodded to the question but didn't seem particularly bothered by the amount of kids. Instead a large grin came to her lips as she came over to the kids, cupping her hands against her mouth and hollering at the rest. Like a pack of animals, they all perked and turned their heads their way. A chill ran down both their backs as they were eyed by thirty-four pairs of wide eyes. and here she thought she was good under pressure. Who would've thought that a hoard of kids, from toddlers to one's as old as Amira, would make her fear for sweet life.

As if sensing her fear, the children rushed their way all at once. Huddling closer to her and trapping them in a circle, the kids spoke all at once asking questions after questions. After a few seconds of it her ears started to hurt. Luckily, Seijin had the mind to shout out louder than them to get their attention.

"How about you all get one question?" He turned tentatively to her and Kohaku nodded. Thirty-four questions wouldn't be bad to answer.

He got them to line up before they started asking away. Some questions were kind of cute. Why was her hair such a bright color? Why couldn't she speak? Was the palace food tasty? Was she there to play with them? To most questions like those, she had simple answers.

Then came the little harder ones. Why did they have to wear different clothes? Would they be safe from the 'bad people' that had attacked them before? Would they be forced to work now that they were orphans? And then the one question that tore her heart that a small toddler asked as she plucked her thumb from her mouth.

"Is daddy coming home?"

Kohaku felt her throat run dry. "No...he's not. And I'm really sorry about that." Kneeling down before the little girl, she picked her up in her arms and held her tightly before signing at Seijin again. "But you won't be left alone. Everyone here is the same and we all have to take care of each other."

The toddler gave the other kids a glance before turning up to Kohaku. "Are they my family?"

"If that's what you want, yes," Kohaku explained. "But I promise you, if you stay together and take care of each other, then I'll be sure that nothing bad ever happens to you again."

The little girl wrapped her arms around Kohaku's neck, returning the gesture. A few of the children, hearing her declaration, came to her and clung to the skirts of her ruqun, Amira among them. The others who were a little older and found no room simply huddled closer around and smiled. Unable to keep her happiness, Kohaku held the girl tightly with one arm while stroking the heads of the others with her free hand.

Undoing their hold and putting her down, Kohaku grinned and turned to grab one of the balls that had been lying about from them playing. Lifting her skirt, she threw the ball in the air before lightly kicking it their way. The mass of children chirped up instantly as they began playing around with. Seijin watched from afar and kept track of time. After a while he intervened, saying she would have to retire back soon for the meeting.

Multiple groans came through the air at hearing this and Kohaku smiled wryly their way as an apology.

"Now children," all heads turned at the booming voice of Thelma, the caretaker the Baisè had previously assigned to the orphans. "It's time to wash up for dinner. Away with all of you now."

Chuckles and giggles erupted at that playful scolding before they scattered about to do as they were told. Amira waved back as she left. Kohaku waved back before lifting her finger to her lips. Reciprocating the gesture, Amira shushed herself before scampering off.

"They're a rowdy bunch, those pumpkins," Thelma called with a huff.

"It's good they're well behaved then," Seijin pointed out.

Thelma agreed before she turned to face Kohaku. A bit self-conscious but able to control herself, she smiled before signing at Seijin. "Thank you for agreeing to continue to watch over them as caretaker of the new orphan home."

"The job isn't anything hard. I like the little pumpkins," she dismissed with ease. "But from what you say, you're the general that the chieftain talked about, the one that saved little Amira." Kohaku affirmed this, quickly saying that it'd been nothing which made Thelma scoff. "I wouldn't call that nothing. And now they tell me you're in charge of that nifty building they're making for the kids and of the education plan for both homes here? That definitely ain't nothing. I thank you, not just for that but for giving these children something to work towards to."

Kohaku smiled and said nothing in return. Instead she excused themselves before they started heading back to the palace.

She had gotten used to the gratitude from the people she inadvertently helped: the soldiers and the orphans. Yet no matter how giddy their gratitude made her, she couldn't rightfully accept it. Everything she did was due to selfish reasons, it just so happened that doing what she did helped others. To her it was a happy coincidence but nothing to be thanked for.

But the surprises didn't stop there. Another one came along during the meeting where Kouen and Koumei informed them about the results of Kohaku's examination.

"I'm sorry," Sousei said somewhat confused but unable to stop the grin that perked at the edge of his lips. "Could you repeat that?"

Sighing in some frustration, Kouen motioned for Koumei to repeat what he'd just said. Promptly, the younger prince followed, "My brother and king has approved of General Kohaku's progress and thusly has informed General Koujiro of her status. That and with both of our recommendations, it has been petitioned for him to annul her previous decision and to institute her as his second-in-command."

"In addition," Kouen interjected before the twins exploded in excitement. "Under my recommendation, there will be no further need for Masami to attend as strategist."

Speechless, Kohaku had to remind herself to breathe when the twins finally burst out in joy. She couldn't keep from smiling at them but had to control herself when Masami stepped up to speak.

"Is that your highness' final decision?" she prudently asked but Kohaku heard a tinge of annoyance underlying her voice.

Kouen nodded. "Despite the fact that there are still things to be desired of her as interim general, she's proved herself capable."

As his brother spoke, Koumei eyed the siblings gathered in their council room that evening. The twins were more ecstatic about the results of their perseverance for their sister. Kohaku, although not explicit about it, was grinning apparently pleased. If anything, he saw disappointment in Masami's eyes. The woman quickly hid it with a warm smile before bowing. "If that is your decision, then I accept, your highness." Turning to the other three, she faced away but Koumei noticed the distinct paleness that took over Kohaku as her grin faltered. "Congratulations, Kohaku. You well deserve what you've earn."

Kohaku's demeanor changed then and become more reclusive. Hanging her head low, she gave a meek grin to Sousei and Suisei to let them calm down. Once they did, Masami turned to face them and all four bowed with a solute.

A wry smile on her face now, Kohaku addressed them one last time. _"Thank you. I am aware of my shortcomings and I won't stop training or studying until I have come to meet both of your expectations."_

"That is what we hope," Kouen announced before dismissing them.

With that the four siblings left the council room and once outside, the twins couldn't help their enthusiasm as all four of them walked to their rooms.

"We did it!" Suisei shouted. It seemed that out of the four she was the most elated about it.

"You mean she did it," Sousei corrected with a nudge at Kohaku. "Got to admit, I was a bit disheartened when you decided not to take us."

"Yeah, what was up with that?"

" _It was a test for me. What good would it have been if I'd taken you guys?"_

"True," the two replied in unison with a shrug of their shoulders.

Sousei stretched his arms over his head with a satisfied sigh. "At least with this father will see past your refusal. With the type of endorsement you're getting, he's got to let you in regardless."

"And Sou'll have someone to learn from when he gets out there too," Suisei pointed out. Sousei didn't reproach her for it but did give her a light punch on the shoulder.

"Now children, it's time to head to bed." All heads turned to Masami when she mentioned this. The twins were a bit perplexed; seeing as it was barely the late evening, they wanted some time to celebrate. This, apparently clear on their faces, got Masami to gently frown. "It's been a long day for us all. And bare in mind that Kohaku's been home for only a couple of days. It wasn't a very easy task either, she must need her rest."

At saying this, Masami glanced back at Kohaku with a small gaze. Despite how small it was, she clearly saw the glint from before during the meeting. Not wanting to anger her any further, she nodded at the twins with a reassuring smile. _"She's right. It's still a little tiring. I'll be fine with some rest."_

The twins shared glance among themselves before agreeing and turning for the night to their rooms. Once the two had left, Masami didn't say one word. Instead she took definite strides to Kohaku's room and opened the door to walk inside, leaving it open. Knowing that whatever awaited her inside wouldn't be good, she took a step forward but stop briefly remembering a few words.

" _You shouldn't let what others think about you or what they do control you to such degree."_

It was easy to think about things in such way when his life wasn't so directly affected by someone. He has a title, a place in the world that belonged to him and that none could take away. Hers was a meaningless existence. One so fragile and unstable that she feared a simple misstep would shatter everything and hurt the people she loved most. That, again, she would make a mistake and lose it all. And for that not to happen, she had to appease the monster inside her room.

Taking one last breath, she went in. As she thought, Masami was already preparing items for what was to come, some Kohaku knew and some she didn't. But her sister tended to get creative with her tortures when she was particularly angry. Those times she hated most.

Once ready, Masami motioned down to the space she'd cleared up in the middle of her room. Kohaku, knowing the protocol, slowly came up to it and stood before her. The first order came quick, "Strip." She flinched at the harsh tone but did as she was told quickly and quietly. Masami came back with a few needles that in the gaslight gleamed a strange dark purple. She eyed them under the light as she came back to Kohaku. "Such a disappointment that my experiments were stopped prematurely. Seriously, they act like I would have killed you. I know my studies, goodness."

Bending down, she stuck one of the needles on Kohaku's forearm making her flinch at the stab. Instead of retracting it, though, Masami left it in place. Kohaku felt a chill run through the inside of her arm, like iced water going through her veins before she felt nothing at all. It paralyzed her arm?

"Now, because of their interventions, I have to perform my own tests. And here I wanted to keep my hands clean." Masami strode to her other side and did the same to her other arm, the coldness quickly changing to numbness. It wasn't until the second one that she knew what Masami was pricking her with: poison.

After the second stab, Masami ordered her to lay down on her bed. Reluctantly, she did so and found it a bit hard to do with her arms unable to move. She hadn't expected the effects to be so fast. Had she heightened its effects somehow? Kohaku fought the urge to shut her eyes, her breathing erratic, as Masami came forward. She ran the tip of the needle across her thighs, scraping as it went.

"That's not the worst part though." Without warning, she stabbed the needle against her thigh, hard enough to make Kohaku gasp loudly. "The worst part is that you present yourself like some kind of hero. A savior, selfless and brave." She scoffed and before her other leg had began to numb, she stabbed the last needle on her other thigh and this time twisting it around for some good measure. "You're nothing but a murderer."

Kohaku bit her lip, wanting the furious digging to end or at least for the poison to take effect and let her not feel it as Masami dug the hole deeper. The latter came sooner and gave her some relief but it also left her defenseless. None of her extremities worked anymore. And she didn't know for how long this time.

"It's new." Masami's words came over the numbness and remnants of the pain from a few seconds before. "A mixture of the poison from before and an anesthetic I got. Combined, we have perhaps, mmh, a good six hours." She reached over to grab the knife she had placed on the bed before scraping it against Kohaku's stomach. At this point, Kohaku didn't have the mind to think and instead her instincts took over. The only things that ruled her mind now were fear and dread. It was obvious anything that came would be bad, it was just a matter of how bad each would be compared to the last one.

Hitting her unexpectedly, Kohaku drew blood from biting down on her lip as Masami slowly brought the blade across her stomach. A redline surfacing, breaking through her skin. "And the twins won't come, you know that, because you will be quiet." She raked the blade across the top of her left breast, making Kohaku yelp. Masami, furious at this, made a deeper slash across her leg and although she didn't quite feel it, Kohaku felt a deep-seated sensation. It burned like hell's fires, and it made her want to cry out from the pain.

Masami put the blade flat against the cut on her leg and Kohaku only felt it burn more. "Funny how different chemicals react with each other. That poison paralyzes but when in contact with another—" she pointed out, lifting the blade from Kohaku's leg, "it has quite the reaction." Masami sat at Kohaku's side of the bed and stared down at her, "You've been getting mighty cocky these past few months. All because you got a few petty men under your thumb. I know you might think yourself _special_ with all the attention you're getting but you're not. And you also might think yourself untouchable now that you're going to be by yourself out in the field." Masami made a slit right on her ribcage and pushed a bit harder making her weep at the pain. "You won't be, lamb. You've never been untouchable. So much power and yet, here we are. You won't hurt me. You don't dare."

"...I don't want to hurt you."

Hearing her voice, Masami flew into a rampage. Taking the hilt of the dagger in her hand, she struck Kohaku right across the face before closing the knife against her throat. "You never talk. Not a word unless I order it of you."

Her jaw throbbing furiously, Kohaku couldn't hold the tears that flowed out from the hard impact. And yet, despite being in so much pain because of it, she turned back to Masami with a deep breath. "I—yes."

"That horrid thing," Masami spat, pressing the blade harder against her flesh. "I never understood how you survived. I never forgave myself for not cutting deeper."

It wasn't hard to recall that night...when everything changed. The night Masami discovered the truth and attacked her—all by accident. The blade pressed closer, so close that she was afraid that if she swallowed it would seriously cut deep this time. "Please...I want to—"

But the sentence ended short when Masami struck the hilt of the dagger against Kohaku's ribs. This time the breath came right out of her from the impact. But it was just one hit, more came raining down with every word Masami enunciated. "Stop—talking—right—this—instant."

The strikes made Kohaku cough furiously while Masami stood up, brushing her fingers through her hair furiously. "You get to say nothing. Nothing but lies come from that filthy tongue of yours." Grabbing Kohaku's jaw in one hand, Masami pried it open before forcefully sticking the blade in. "So stop talking or I'll cut it out for you." Kohaku cried not knowing what else to do to stop her. "Stop crying, you fucking filth!" The scraping of the steel against her teeth made her anxiety rise to the roofs. Frantically, she tried getting her hands to move and stop her but they didn't answer. It wasn't until she actually cut her tongue and part of her lower lip that Masami withdrew the dagger.

By that point, Kohaku was at her limit. Getting scared like that was one of the worst things and it drained all of her strength. Masami paced around the room and although it was hard to, Kohaku followed her around with her eyes as she did so. Talking had been a really bad choice but something in her compelled her to. It wasn't that she was tired of being quiet. It was something else…

"I can't let myself be like this." Taking a breath to get her composure back, Masami turned with a sickly sweet smile to Kohaku. "I can't be too rough with you and risk leaving more blemishes, now. Can I, lamb? No, we can't raze that pretty little face. After all, you're my special toy. I can't let you break so easily." Leaving the knife behind, Masami picked up something else. She wasn't able to see it very well as Masami started tapping her stomach and legs with whatever she had in her hand. It felt blunt, not sharp. It wasn't until she started pummeling her body with it that it began to hurt. And it was all in silence. All she could hear were her own gasps on every hit.

Then the pauses started.

Hit, pause. Hit, pause, hit. Hit, hit, and pause again. Longer pause. Harder hit.

Suddenly, she started tapping between her legs.

Then the dread hit her. "No...please. Please."

"Oh, you spoke?" Masami crooned with a crooked smile, the object tapping back and forward between her inner thighs. "You can't do that. You're mute, remember? You need to learn to be—quiet!"

Kohaku gasped loudly at the horrible pain that came over her entire body. She wanted to curl inward but couldn't. Thatthing was _inside_ her.

"Now...if you promise to be quiet. I will stop." She pulled it out and asked again. "Will you be quiet?" Kohaku was in between nodding when it came in again making her cry out, her voice hoarse and her tears coming out relentlessly. "That's not quiet. Let's try again, mmh?"

But she couldn't. She played this game, switching between hitting her and forcing it inside her. It hurt. She couldn't stop it. True to what she'd said, the poison started wearing off close to dawn. The sun was peeking over her windows when Kohaku could finally move her legs to curl up into herself. Seeing this, Masami backed away.

"What a night," she said with a yawn. "I should get some rest before breakfast. You should stay put, lamb. Take some time off." She chuckled as she retrieved everything she'd brought with her, "Don't worry. You'll have the whole day to yourself. I won't let anybody interrupt you, promise. Good day, little lamb."

Kohaku ignored it all. The buzzing in her head rang and didn't let her listen to her as she left. Her body hurt. The cuts, the hits, the… Her hands came up to her ears and covered them, wanting to vanish the sensation away. But instead she heard her heartbeat. Loud. Thumping.

 _Why won't you just stop beating…?_

No. She furiously wiped at her face but the tears wouldn't stop flowing. How many times had she asked that question after such horrid things? And how many times did she never let her mind wonder to such solution? No, she wouldn't resort to such thing. Even through this—despite how horrible it was—she still had things to do.

Promises to keep. And she knew exactly what it was like to have nothing from someone other than broken promises. She wouldn't let that be her; she wouldn't leave and leave behind nothing but broken promises.

Lifting her gaze, Kohaku caught the brightness of the sun as it rose and shone through her window. It was past dawn. Curiously, apart from the pain, she felt a little remorse. Unable to move well yet, she knew she wouldn't be able to go train. She was already late as it was. But that brought on another pain—she didn't want to lose his respect.

 _I'm not as strong as you think I am, En. I'm not._

Unable to keep herself awake any longer, both from the pain and fatigue, she fainted. It wasn't until hours later that she woke up still sore. Perhaps she might've slept longer had the sound of pelleting water coming down against her window not woken her up. Raising herself from her bed, she watched the rain as it poured down, the outside darkened most likely by the clouds that had found their way to their skies.

Not wanting to stay all day, or night, in bed she forced herself up so she could go bathe. It took a while longer than usual to tend her wounds mostly because it was still a bit hard to move. Eventually she managed to dress her wounds while ignoring the large bruises that started to form around her stomach and legs. Not wanting to spend too much effort, she dressed in the simplest ruqun she had and headed out. Walking around, she noticed that the evening had come quite fast. That or she had really passed out for the whole day.

Not wanting to think about it, she found a spot near the gardens and decided to stop. Her tired and hurt legs could only take her so far. The spot nearest was dry enough for her to sit down, so she took it and stared out the hall to the rain as it fell. Because of the rain not many people were outside. The few she saw as she stared out were servants going about on their tasks. None addressed her even if they came to her proximity. It was good but some part of her wanted somebody to notice.

Somebody that actually cared enough to look past everything and notice that not everything was all right. But she knew that was too much to ask for.

No one cared. No one listened. Even if she could speak.

Closing her eyes, she let the sound of the pouring rain calm her mind. Rain wasn't always something she liked. It depended on her mood, usually. At times like these, though, it felt...comfortable to be out in the cold. It didn't really matter that the edges of her skirt were dirtying from the water that reached her, or that she wasn't very presentable in the clothes she'd chosen. She just wanted to feel comfortable for a few hours before she went back to her room to rest.

But the calm was disturbed when quick footsteps caught her ear. Turning to their direction, Kohaku was stunned to see Sousei practically rushing through the hallways almost slipping to turn a corner as he spotted her. He was shouting her name to get her attention. As he reached her out of breath and incoherent as he spoke, Kohaku stood to meet him. Not even a linguist could have understood him with how he spoke which prompted her to grab him by the shoulders and calm him down. Once he could take a solid breath, Kohaku signed at him.

" _What's the matter, Sou?"_

"Word," he panted. "From home—something happened."

That took away every ounce of pain she had as the adrenaline kicked in. She quickly told him to take her to whomever had those news. Sousei didn't waste a second and dragged her behind him to a small parlor near their rooms. Kohaku recognized it as the place where the twins would go to spend time with Masami. At this time of night, she presumed they were just finishing up dinner by the looks of the plates that were left behind in the foreroom.

It wasn't until she stepped deeper into the room though that she saw the devastation.

Suisei was on the floor in shatters, tears streaming down her face as she hoarsely cried onto Masami's shoulder. Masami herself was weeping, her arms wrapped around Suisei tightly while in her hands she held the letter that Kohaku assumed was the word from home. This perturbed Kohaku a lot and her mind couldn't stop racing at the familiarity of the scene.

 _Oh god, no._

"W-What…" Sousei didn't get to finish his thought. He strode up and took the letter from Masami to read. Kohaku, not wanting but needing to know at the same time, came over to read it over his shoulder. It was a short notice but it was enough to get the message through. Sousei struggled to stay on his feet as he staggered backwards. Catching him, Kohaku brought him closer to her as he began muttering incoherences over and over before he began to cry. Kohaku held him tight as he did the same, his tears soaking through to her shoulder as he wept. Despite it hurting, she didn't stop him from shouting at the top of his lungs that it couldn't be.

 _Not this._

And all she could do was hold him.

 _Not again._

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _First of, allow me to explain what the beginning tag was about. I hadn't planned most of this chapter. After the expedition most of it came ad lib. But as I started writing the latter quarter of the chapter, I noticed that some people may be uncomfortable with it. If some of you were, then I apologize and I hope that the warning worked. If you didn't need it, then I hope my choice of writing didn't offend anybody._

 _Now with that out of the way, I hoped that you liked this chapter regardless of the previous remark. I swear to cheeses, these chapters keep getting longer and longer the more I write them._

 _There were a lot of new things on this chapter: Beleth's djinn equip and Kohaku's actual voice state being some of them. What about the ending though? What you guys think happened now?_

 _I hope you guys are working towards that mystery that will be solved soon. Next chapter will have some clues before the big reveal so I hope you guys look forward to that. As for those who've been wondering if this story will ever meet canon, don't worry, it will. Be patient, my children._

 _Now, I know it's been a long time since the last chapter (or not -w-u) But I've been struggling with school, life, and health. It sucks when one person get sick in an apartment; even worse when that means everybody else will eventually get sick too. So yeah. Luckily, I've been slowly writing this chapter and it finally got done!_

 _First let's say hi to those lovely people who Favorited and Followed:  
\- vnienhuis  
\- stellarroze  
\- Creme Tea  
\- Pookie Luffs Sushi  
\- Crusader King  
\- dawn08_

 _Now I have to leave you all. I'm tired and sick and should be resting but wanted to put this out for you guys to read over what's left of the weekend. Hope you enjoy it and stay tuned for the next chapter._


	7. Cataclysm

_**Chapter Seven:**_

 _Cataclysm_

* * *

" _...Ceara?"_

 _No answer. Kohaku sighed defeated, having expected as much even with calling her vassal. But as she watched the older girl from the doorstep of the room they shared, she felt her heart sink. Kohaku watched from a distance as Ceara broke down weeping on her bed. Her cries had long gone deaf against her ears from how long she'd been crying. And it tore at Kohaku to see Ceara—her friend—hurting to such extent. And as empathetic as she may be, she couldn't fathom the pain of her loss._

 _Ceara had just found out her older brother had died out in the battlefield against the Gou and Kai. The battle had been won and it took their small nation of Kou closer to uniting the three countries, but it had cost many their loved ones—-including a little girl her only living relative._

 _Kohaku clenched her fists against her chest at being unable to fathom such loss. She would be devastated if Masami or her baby siblings were to pass unexpectedly. But she highly doubted that it would be the same. If Kohaku lost anybody, she would have her family to mourn with, to help her through it._

 _Ceara had no one._

 _Wanting to comfort her as best she could, Kohaku entered the room and came closer to her. Touching her shoulder lightly, she was shocked to have Ceara turning as if taken aback. Her stark blue eyes were glazed over, puffy and red from her crying. Her bright features dampened and dirtied by the stains._

" _Ceara…" Kohaku whispered unable to stomach her looking like this. "I'm so so—"_

" _Don't!" Ceara screeched out, smacking away Kohaku's hand. A semblance of fury took over her childlike features. "I'm sick and tired of people saying sorry. Everybody's sorry he's gone. But no one cared to bring me more than a damn sword and apologies!"_

" _I-I know it isn't fair but it's going to be all right—"_

" _No, it's not," Ceara shouted unable to keep her emotions in check anymore. The tears continued to stream down her face as she glared at her. "Cael's dead, Haku. He's gone and I'm alone. So screw off and leave me alone." Kohaku jumped back, startled, as Ceara came off from her bed and ran out the door of the room. Devastated as she felt, Kohaku knew Ceara hadn't meant any of those things._

 _Her friend was the nicest person. She took care of Kohaku who was two years younger, and loved spending time together. It'd been Ceara who taught her to not be afraid of the world as it was now, to embrace it for what it could be. But now, Ceara's world crashed around her. It was clear to Kohaku that Ceara was mourning and would continue to do so. And she couldn't stop her._

 _And now she too was left by herself with no one to talk to. At least no one that would care to hear about Ceara's predicament. Approaching Masami's room, Kohaku had hoped to at least be able to spend some time with her and wait for Ceara but opening the door only sunk her heart further. Beyond the parlor, inside her sister's room, Kohaku could hear Masami's incessant wails. Much like Ceara, she kept weeping and asking 'why' over and over. Kohaku didn't understand why she was so upset but she knew that interrupting her would just be the same as it had been with Ceara. They needed time._

 _That night she fell asleep in her empty room. In the middle of it, a ruckus awoke her. Groggy as she was, Kohaku managed to catch the glimpse of a silhouette: one her size. "Ceara?"_

 _The girl stopped and turned, bright blue eyes visible as the moonlight hit them. Toeing closer to her bed, Ceara smiled weakly at her. "Sorry I woke you up "_

" _Where are you going?" Kohaku asked puzzled at seeing her fully dressed._

" _Kitchen." Kohaku raised an eyebrow but blinked, still half asleep. "Don't worry, I'll be back before you know it." Ceara gently laid Kohaku back down on her bed and tucked her in, stroking her hair. "And Haku…?"_

" _Mmh?"_

" _I'm sorry...for shouting at you."_

 _Kohaku smiled warmly and reached a hand out to touch Ceara's cheek, one she noticed was still stained in streaks of tears even in the dim light. Her tiny hand brushed against Ceara's cheek and stopped her for a breath. "It's okay. I know you didn't mean to."_

 _Ceara pursed her lips before taking Kohaku's hand off from her face and laying it beside her. "Goodnight, Kohaku."_

" _Goodnight, Ceara," she replied with a yawn. Sleep was quickly taking over her but she managed to hear Ceara rustling as she left._

 _The next morning, Kohaku awoke to find her room empty, her friend gone, and no sighting of her since the day before. Kohaku looked but she was nowhere to be found._

 _She was gone._

 _And it wouldn't be until three months later that they would meet again._

* * *

Despite being the early hours of the morning, it was stunning to watch darkened clouds overtake the skies. The rain that ushered itself since the night prior was also quite unexpected when their winter days had been filled with nothing but sunshine and mild coldness. And yet, since late the day before, Rakushou saw nothing but pouring rains.

Koumei watched this from the study as he spent the morning briefing Kouen about the news that had arrived late the night before.

"So, how did it happen?" Kouen began as he stood by Koumei to watch the servants as they struggled by to quickly arrange for what was necessary. Even a small funeral was by no means easy to put together, especially at such short notice.

With a noticeably tired sigh, Koumei reached behind him to a scroll sitting idly on the desk. From it he recited what the magicians had relegated to the Reizei siblings and what had the palace so mobilized on such a dank morning. "As of early yesterday evening, Reizei Koujiro succumbed to his illness, one he'd been fighting against for the better part of two years. His wife, Arianna, and some of the staff that had been attending them passed away as well apparently having contracted the same illness. Others are in late stages and are being attended by healers in Shika."

"I thought word had come of the General's recovery," Kouen mulled as the information came.

"It appears the illness struck harder than anticipated." Koumei contemplated about this as he placed the scroll down again. "After fighting it for two years, it doesn't surprise me that he eventually fell to it. It seems their mother's death was unexpected from what Masami got to inform me, however. None of them knew their mother was even ill." He turned to his brother then, "As per your orders, the four of them have been informed that they cannot travel back to Shika, seeing as whatever struck their parents could inadvertently infect them too. And bringing that back to the palace would only be troublesome."

"Preparations are being done, I see," Kouen replied.

He nodded and continued to watch the surreal image outside their window. It amazed him that outside where much was happening, behind walls it didn't seem to reach them as much. And even with so many people working to ready the funeral for the early afternoon, they had yet to see a glimpse of the now orphaned siblings. "They've recluse themselves, too." Koumei heaved a sigh this time somewhat exasperated. "This couldn't have happened at a more inopportune time."

The council and his brother and king had already finished preparations for their advancement towards the west; specifically, their attack on Magnostadt. In two weeks time, they enact the attack; they had planned to inform the generals involved about it in a few days as well. And seeing as they would employ a full siege—from the eastern plains of the city and South through Balbadd—they would need those involved to be prepared. With this neither Kohaku nor the twins would be mentally adequate to fight.

"They will be ready by the time we start mobilizing." Koumei was surprised at his brother's statement.

"I hope so," he added. Otherwise they would have to accommodate things to better suit this latest predicament. That or, god forbid, delay the siege. Knowing his brother, however, Koumei doubted the latter would come to be.

Kouen stood up from his place and motioned out to Koumei. "We should prepare ourselves to pay respects."

Koumei nodded. Having been a former general of their army, it would be expected of them to do as much. Seeing as he would have been their father-in-law, it also mandatory for them to attend at least to show their respects. It reminded him of the funeral they attended almost half a year ago. Hopefully this one would be much less eventful.

* * *

One year. Two funeral. One she didn't really care for, the other she hated the fact that she couldn't cry.

Kohaku stood amidst the darken room. No sunlight entered, not like there was any to begin with. The dark clouds grayed the skies as rain continued to pour; the same from the night before. The incense burning plunged into her nostrils in harsh tendrils of smoke. Two shrines stood in the middle of the room, the priests littering the sides of it, praying.

Sousei and Suisei were cladded in black and white, kneeling before the two vigils. Their cries were deafening; Suisei's definitely were as she wept against Sousei's shoulder. He simply held onto her tightly trying to drive away his own anguish as the tears fell. A few steps behind them was Masami and she stood as quiet and still as a statue. From her viewpoint at the very back, Kohaku could see her shaking, trying very hard not to shed tears.

She, on the other hand, didn't have to try. It wasn't because she wasn't sad; there just weren't anymore tears to shed. So she didn't disturb their mourning. Instead, she stood back and watched over them, trying to understand and cope in her own way the loss they just suffered.

Death. Both their father, who had been suffering from illness, and their mother, who had contracted it, had been taken by it. The worst part of all was that none of them could even return home to properly see them off. What killed their parents and at least half of the staff back at home was some unknown illness. From how quickly it spread with such mild symptoms to account for it, the healers suspected something lethal; something that had to be controlled. In the midst of that investigation, they had deemed the Reizei manor inhospitable. Even worse, those who'd died from the infection couldn't be conventional buried. In fear of what the illness could be or do, all who perished from it would be cremated, their parents included. Kohaku grimaced while biting at her lip, sure that in Shika the bodies probably were burning into ashes by now.

All they had been allowed to do was stand and mourn two empty caskets under shrines. She thought it truly pathetic and disgraceful for their parents to be given such disrespect, but there was nothing she could do. There was no say for her in the matter even as a general. It came down to a meager ceremony for their sake in the end.

Kohaku's thoughts came to a screeching halt when she felt a rush of air against her. At turning, she saw Masami's back as she exited the place. Grimacing, Kohaku turned from the closed door to the twins, concern marring her expression But at seeing them she was reminded of one thing that remained true even through this whole ordeal: they had each other. They always did.

So she went after Masami. Thankfully she hadn't run far off and stood off to the side of an empty hallway away from rain that fell. She stood ways from the entrance, the guards around ignoring her as she tried hard to swallow her sobs. Kohaku, feeling the sinking of her own chest, stepped forward placing a hand on her shoulder. Masami turned about slowly but the moment she saw Kohaku her face contorted into a glower.

"…get your hands off me."

Pretenses didn't matter. It was more than obviously to Kohaku as she heard every spiteful enunciation of Masami's words. They were the least that mattered now when the pain overrode everything. There was no attempt in hiding the deep-seated hatred that Masami held. Her eyes flared in anger, but also stained in the tears as they finally fell. Kohaku remained still and took the words for once feeling pity, as ludicrous as it sounded.

A major part of her hated Masami just as much as she hated of abuse taught her to fear, to hate. But a much smaller part, one that she retained from childhood, was understanding of what Masami was feeling at that very moment. This wasn't like before, it wasn't hatred from a woman angered at her lies; Kohaku knew it as displaced hatred born of deep anguish. Sorrow, when deeply felt, bred all kinds of responses. Anger was one of them.

 _And stupidity. But that seems to exclusively apply to me, somehow._

Retracting her hand, she signed a few words instead.

" _Don't waste your energy, Masami. It's not worth it. We should be inside with Sou and Sui. They need us now more than ever."_

"We…?" she sneered, her lividness growing tenfold. "You don't even belong in that room. Stop acting like you care."

" _As much as it kills you to hear this, I care. About you, not so much anymore, but I care deeply about Sou and Sui. That's why now isn't the time—"_

Masami smacked Kohaku's hands, stopping her from even finishing her sentence. Kohaku began to raise them again but stopped at seeing the pain in Masami's eyes. Calming her would be impossible.

"You don't have the _right_ to care about them. You've never been a part of this family. No matter how you look, how you act, how you _talk_...you are _not_ her."

The words pained Kohaku. The mere fact that Masami would bring that up showed her how devastated their parents' death had truly left her.

Hiding her face as she lowered her head, Masami spat out the words in a demanding hiss just under her breath. "Leave… I don't want to see your face in there even after it's over. Don't come near Sousei or Suisei. Just stay away from us." She strode past Kohaku, a painful shove against her shoulder clearing a path that laid wide open as she spoke her last words, "If you don't, I'll tell everybody and anyone who'll listen." Kohaku simply stood there letting those words sink as Masami's footsteps retreated back into the funeral, the door closing solemnly behind her.

Turning on her heels, Kohaku watched the closed door as she stood unable to take a step forth. This had been the most open threat she'd placed in front of Kohaku. A very clear ultimatum: take one more step and the world will know.

It would pass, surely, but it wouldn't be wise to test her. So instead she headed towards the inner gardens were the peach trees were bare, some budding in early anticipation of the upcoming spring. Kohaku sat down at the edge of a hall somewhere in the West Wing, as far as she could get from the funeral. As she sat there, her physical pain began to override the emotional. Her legs began to throb as did her stomach, turning in on itself once more. Rubbing her hands against her arms—both of which she still felt some phantom numbness from—she watched the rain fall against the ground. Winter pours coming in for the coming spring. A cool breeze came and swept her hair, some water catching on her cheeks. Not bothering with it, Kohaku bent her legs and rested her chin atop her knees, her hands wandering down to her feet to cradle herself in the cold.

Despite the winter rain making it all the colder, she felt like it helped numb the hurt as the sinking in her chest continued, tearing something in her ever so slowly. It wasn't such a bad pain, though. It hurt but at least it showed they were dealing with it. For now, they would mourn, anger would come to pass, and they would find a way to continue the legacy of their family under the rule of the Kou Empire. It would be what their father would have wanted.

But as she sat there, hugging her knees tightly to her chest, Kohaku couldn't help but hate herself for thinking so bleakly. Had she truly grown so detached from life that even the death of their parents seemed trivial? If anything the mere thought of that made her angry rather than sad.

"Well, if it isn't the rot of the bunch."

In spite of its playful meaning, Kohaku couldn't help the disdain that came from her at hearing Judar calling her. The mood she was in didn't allow her to respond, though. It was curious what a slap from reality could do to someone; how it made them quiet, docile, unresponsive.

The magi, unaware or simply ignoring this, plunged down to sit beside her. Since she didn't turn to glance at him directly, she could only see him from the corner of her eye. What she did see were his feet as they laid before him along with the ends of his braid, Judar not caring that they were getting wet. It was only when he sat down that she heard the distinctive smacking of his lips as he ate. From the watery noise he made, she supposed they were peaches.

"What's with the hideous getup?" he asked as he chewed onto the juicy fruit.

Thinking was tiring at the moment. But she knew that Judar wouldn't stop asking regardless. What was more, she didn't really care at the moment what she said, either. Seeing as neither would care for it, her thoughts came as crudely as she felt.

" _My parents died,"_ she thought, nihilistically. _"They're being mourned right now."_

The smacking stopped instantly. Kohaku didn't put attention to it but Judar didn't comment until a few seconds later. "And you're not with the two mole rats and cuckold bitch?"

" _They—I'm not wanted there."_ At thinking this, Kohaku chuckled and brushed her fingers through her hair, _"No. I don't belong there...with them."_

"That's stupid."

The fact that he came up with such solution astounded her. Not because it was plain but because it was true. _"If it makes her feel better, who am I to argue? I've taken enough from them already. And if I just have to stay away for right now, then...well, doesn't seem too hard."_

"You're talking nonsense too, _Taozi._ Knowing your sappy ass, you wouldn't wander a foot from them." Judar scoffed and out of the blue threw his half-eaten peach out towards the garden. The fruit exploded at making contact with the tree that stood some feet away from them. Kohaku heard the blood rushing through him, his heart thumping a slightly bit harder, his breathing a tad bit shallower all at once. "They're your family."

" _They are, aren't they?"_

But even to her own head, those words sounded fabricated. Their meaning absent. What should have been a clear cut reply to his question ended doing nothing but adding to what Masami already said.

" _You don't have the right to care about them. You've never been a part of this family. No matter how you look, how you act, how you talk...you are_ not _her."_

 _No...they're not._

Masami's words and her own reminder shot that lie dead. Burying her face against her knees and hiding it from the world, she wished for once that she could just go away and disappear. For once just forget everything and leave. But that was easier thought than anything. Too many things anchored her to the life she lived now. What she saw to lose hugely outweighed what she could gain. And that just completely sunk her heart to her stomach.

A small nudge took her out of her depressive mind for an instant. The smacking returned as she lifted her head enough to glance down at her feet where she'd felt whatever it had been touch her. At doing so, she saw a small peach as it still wobbled a bit from being pushed there. Lifting her gaze to Judar, she only caught him eating his own as he watched the gardens. He didn't say a word. Reaching for the small fruit, Kohaku brought it up to her lips before taking a small bite.

Her thoughts rushed further into the despair from before but another tiny bite brought her back just the same. They went back—they sunk into guilt, sorrow, self-hatred—before the sweetness brought her back to the rain and the boy that sat beside her. Such struggle went on for a few more bites until a dreadful realization came to her.

 _It's like back then._

Kohaku was at odds with herself now just like she had been thirteen years ago. Back when it was about a little lonely girl. A girl conflicted with things no one knew of. A girl having thrusted herself in a place she didn't belong. A girl in a role...that wasn't hers.

 _I'm sorry._

Slightly choking on the small bite, Kohaku whimpered softly while holding one hand against her face. The two words repeated over and over in her head as her whimpers quickly changed to sobs. Her voice hoarse on its own only made her sobs that much more horrible. Unable to hold onto it anymore, Kohaku broke down and let go of the barely eaten peach. It fell and rolled away from her into the open and under the rain before them. Judar stopped briefly mid-bite as he heard her crying out. The sound came over the rainfall softly but he heard it. Taking another peach, he placed it beside her once more before going back to eat his.

Judar sat in silence by her side as she wept out in her anguish.

* * *

Unable to be as composed as he made himself seem, Kouha sighed and stretched his arms behind his head. He gandered at his brothers by the corner of his eyes and noticed nothing amiss. As if the three of them hadn't just left a ceremonial burial. Thinking about it now, though, he understood why they weren't despondent.

Reizei Koujiro had been a general but by his standards he didn't compare to those with Djinn like himself, his brothers, or even Kougyoku. It was of much higher value to posses a Metal Vessel than just be a normal soldier. It's why he understand his brother En's choice to have Haku as general rather than her father. But that'd all gone to shit seeing as he was dead now.

Speaking of her, Kouha grimaced at remembering that Kohaku had been sorely missing from the funeral. Kougyoku had been there before them and said that she hadn't been there when she arrived either. Sousei and Suisei knew she left with Masami that early morning but only Masami came back in. They had no idea where Kohaku went. It was sad to see them so downtrodden; they were a noisy bunch, especially Suisei, but they weren't all that bad. To see her so sad to the point she was so quiet was unnerving. Sousei tried being the stronger one for their sake but he was unusually anxious. It seemed Kougyoku being there helped, so Kouha didn't intervene like he usually did. Masami had nothing to say about Kohaku, just that she left and didn't know where to.

Very impolitely too if he said so himself. But her disappearance lingered in his mind as the three of them made their way to his brother En's study. Mei and him had stuff to talk about and since they let him join, it didn't seem to be anything urgent. Yet the one missing sibling from the funeral had his mind wrapped up in confusion.

"Where d'ya suppose she's gone to?" Kouha asked finally unable to keep it to himself.

"Mourn on her own terms, perhaps," Koumei said with a yawn, covering her mouth. "But I wouldn't be able to name you a place if that's what you want."

Sprinting a few steps ahead, Kouha turned about to walk backwards so he could face them both. "You have any idea, En-nii?"

Kouen stayed silent and shook his head. White lie but he needn't have to answer. He had a few places in mind but surely the most obvious wouldn't be correct. At least that's what he thought until they reached the door to his study in the West Wing. As soon as he opened the door for the three of them, he heard Judar's loud voice echo from inside.

"You're pulling it!" His screech echoed along with disparate grunts. "Damn it, be careful." Confusion and curiosity flooded into the three brothers and with Kouen in the lead, they followed the sounds deeper into the study until they spotted their country's magi. And not by himself. With their backs towards them, he and Kohaku sat facing away. Judar's hair had been undone and Kohaku had half a braid done and adorned fully with different budding flowers of varying colors. As she did a fold, she reached down her side where an empty basket sat. Feeling nothing of what was supposed to be there, she tapped Judar on the shoulder. There was silence before the magi clicked his tongue, "You finished them already?"

Kohaku bopped his arm and grimaced before Judar groaned in irritation. Nonetheless, he picked out his wand before twirling it. The few seeds in the basket sprouted and became fully grown with the little bit of Life Magic he poured in them. A small smile on her lips, she picked one from the bunched and entwined it between his hair as she continued plaiting it.

The three had been completely quiet during this small exchange and it wasn't until Kouha snorted that either of them noticed their presence. Annoyed and flustered, Judar opened his mouth and tried getting up at the same time. Not willing to let him go when she wasn't finished, Kohaku pouted and held onto his hair, plunging him down back to a sit. He fought with her briefly about letting his hair go but whatever argument she brought up made him shut up without a reproach.

Incredibly, Kouen had been proven wrong. Kouha skipped over to them and squatted before the two.

"The white ones look better," he added, putting another one as Kohaku continued to braid.

It surprised Kouen and Koumei that she had completely ignored them. Even with Kouha as he continued to give his feedback or tease Judar about the whole ordeal, she remained quiet with a wistful yet empty smile.

Not seeing anything wrong with this, Koumei ignored her and went on what he'd planned on doing. Kouen, however, noticed how unkempt she was and it bothered him. She was still in her funeral attire and it'd been dirtied somehow, the skirts wet and muddied along with her shoes. Not only that but her face was slightly stained and...her lip.

"By the way, Haku, why are you still dressed in these things?" Kouha asked as he lifted the skirts of her muddied ruqun.

Unbelievably, she didn't bother signing. Instead, Judar turned her way with a click of his tongue. "What the fuck do I look like, you're damn messenger boy?" She jokingly pulled at his hair hard enough for him to yelp and grab at his scalp. Getting the message, he replied to him. "The rot said she doesn't care for it." a smug smirk came to him as he added, "Not like she'd care anyway after bawling so ugly—ow!"

Narrowing her eyes at him, Kohaku tightened the fold of the plait while glaring at Judar. He mumbled back at her for doing that but Kohaku didn't seemed fazed about his annoyance. All she did was continue plaiting his hair with the flowers.

The fact that her disregard for her wellbeing was so blatant irked Kouen. She was truly going out of her way to not speak to them directly and spoke only to Judar. And he thought the twins had been reclusive; compared to them, Kohaku appeared bleaker. And it bothered him.

Taking long strides to her, Kouen reached down to grab her by her forearm before lifting her up to her feet. All those in the room were surprised at the sudden action, excluding Kohaku. The woman simply stared dumbfounded at her arm before coming to glare up clearly peeved at him. "You want to remain here, fine. I'm not stopping you. But go and tidy yourself first." Letting her gently off his grip, he hadn't noticed that he'd lifted her up of off the floor to the point that she needed to stand on her toes to touch it. She hadn't complained though. It irritated her more than anything, apparently, that he'd been so forceful.

Judar let out a round of laughter and held onto his stomach. "Oh, wow, _Taozi_. Now you're speaking my language!" His fingers reached up to wipe away a couple of tears coming from his bout. "Entei, you've gotta hear what she just said."

For once, Kohaku reacted and skipped back from Kouen to catch Judar by his finished plait before yanking at it. Judar spat back vulgarities as she tugged at it. From what he could gather from their one-sided conversation, she was adamant about not wanting to leave. The issue was getting more problematic that he intended it to be. But he knew of something else that would prompt her to listen even if she didn't want to.

"Kouha." Curiously enough, all three of them—Kouha, Kohaku, and Judar—turned at hearing Kouen call for his younger brother. "Escort her and make sure she does as I asked."

"Yeah," Kouha replied. Taking Kohaku by the hand, he starts walking away but stops. He turns to catch Kohaku not wanting to budge from her place. "C'mon, Haku. It'll be quick and then you'll be back here. How about when we return we bun up Judar's hair?"

The thought of it made her smile a bit before she nodded. They'd only taken a few steps towards the door when Kohaku remembered a certain loudmouth. Retracing her path, she came back to Judar before grabbing his braid and pulling him along as they left for her room.

The action seemed childish to Kouen's eyes but he caught a glimpse of how tightly she'd been holding onto the magi. She hadn't wanted to leave him behind—whether in fear of him talking about their conversations or because she just didn't want to be alone was unclear to him.

"Were we like this?" Kouen turned to Koumei as he came to stand by his side watching where the three had just left. He grimaced and let his head drop as he spoke just above a whisper. "Back when mother…"

Kouen sighed and lifted his gaze to the ceiling, trying to find an answer to a question that he'd never given any thought to. It'd been years since she passed away and he seldom recalled any memories of that time. It wasn't like he did so often, anyway. "Everyone takes it differently."

Certainly, how they reacted when their mother first passed was different to how the four siblings were taking it. Solemnity like Masami's he anticipated; it was predictable. The twins' reaction reminded him much of Koumei's when their mother passed. But Kohaku seemed detached, somehow. It was clear to anyone that she was devastated, and it showed from her quietness and reluctance to listen. But there was also a semblance of numbness.

What wasn't as clear was where it stemmed from. Kouen reached a hand to Koumei's shoulder and held it tightly, "However it was, it's done with now. They'll learn to live with it."

Just like they had.

* * *

"You're taking too long, _Taozi!_ "

" _Shut up, Judar."_ Kohaku huffed at him from the other side of the screen that separated her room from where the two boys were. As adamant as she had been before about not leaving, she was kind of glad that she had now. Warm, clean clothes did wonders on how heavy her body had felt. Her mind was still running slow, though. The day wasn't over yet and it still hung over her head like dead weight.

Some little brightness came over her depressing day, surprisingly. Judar's company had been peaceful to have. Having him by her made it easier to not act as the grown up she was—it was like having a lease on being a petulant child for once. It amazed her that he'd let her braid his hair, even more that he'd let her put the flowers on it. But he'd noticed the mood as horrid as it was. It just went to show that despite how much of a brat he was, Judar had a tender side to him too.

It took her a bit of time to find the clothes she wanted, a simple set that was comfortable to wear. Kouha kept asking questions that she answered through Judar who in turn gave snarky remarks of his own when he wanted. She didn't mind, though. It was when she began taking her clothes off to change into her clean ones that she began to disregard them.

"She's taking awfully long," Kouha mumbled as he leaned against a wall nearest to the screen.

Judar began to turn impatient, his footsteps thumping loudly as he paced around her room. "Hurry up, rot! I'm bored."

" _I'm almost done."_

"Change faster," he whined.

"You know..." Kouha started as he examined his nails. Lifting his gaze to meet Judar's, he grinned before finishing his sentence. "Surely, if we lend her a hand, things would go faster."

Judar smirked at hearing that. The two held onto the side of the screen and, with a mischievous glint in their eyes, yanked at the screen pulling it aside. The two met bright blue eyes full of bewilderment. Like she'd said, she was almost dressed but the shock had made her scramble mindlessly to cover herself, inadvertently exposing some of her stomach and legs. Judar cackled at the prank as did Kouha until his eyes landed on her exposed skin.

Bruises and cuts were scattered on her stomach and legs. And they looked fresh—bruises mildly dark mixed with red and opaque tans, cuts pink and rutted.

Unfortunately, he couldn't keep staring. Kohaku instinctively took her feather pen from her hair and swept it aside. In an instant, it turned into the sound staff and the sound that vibrated out smashed against them like a punch, sending them off against the furthest wall. Kouha rolled out and landed with his back against the floor and legs up against the wall. Judar, the lucky bastard, had his borg to protect him. It bounced off the wall and Judar landed on the floor, cackling away. Before they could even recover, Kohaku had already closed the screen again.

Judar winced, his laughter stopping, as he picked at his ear. "D-Don't yell. It was a damn prank."

" _I'd crucify you both if I could, you scoundrels!"_

"Relax," Judar scoffed as they got up. "Not much to see anyway."

Kohaku parted the screen open and glared at Judar, her cheeks molten. Holding the feather pen between her teeth as she busied her hands on loosely braiding her hair, she stalked off and out of the room with the two following behind her.

Once back at the study, she left them and stormed off toward a different section of the library they had in the room. Judar snickered before sitting back down and lying back to rest. Kouha, still perplexed, went to Koumei's side and jumped on one of the ottomans laying around.

"Something the matter?" Koumei asked, noticing his behavior.

Kouha shook his head, lifting it when he heard Kohaku coming back from wherever she'd gone to. With a bound journal in her hands, she went over to the biggest desk. The one he knew his brother En used most. Recalling him and noticing him gone, he asked his brother Mei.

Koumei shrugged his shoulders at the question. "Said he had some things to do but that he'd be back soon."

"Are you both done for the day?" Kouha asked, languidly as he stared out the window. The raining had yet to stop, but surely night had rolled around.

"Yes," he replied. " Some preparations for the siege on Magnostadt still need adjusting but they're only minor. For now, our brother and king suggested we rest."

"He did?" Kouha's voice finally perked up at hearing that. It sounded nothing like his brother En. Usually, he was eager to go for anything that meant progress. If anything, he was usually more brazen and upfront about his demands for the generals and soldiers when planned battles neared their time. "That sounds—"

"Odd," Koumei finished with a nod. "I know, but we are not to argue." A yawn escaped him as he took one of the scrolls he had back up again to read as he sat down besides Kouha. "Besides, some rest sounds wonderful."

Kouha chuckled and patted Koumei's head. "You haven't been sleeping right again, have you?" Koumei only grumbled under his breath and it made Kouha snicker again. A few minutes pass with only the four of them being in the study. Finding it so eerily quiet, he went to Judar's side and began pestering him seeing as neither Koumei nor Kohaku seemed to be up to talking.

"Judar."

"What?" he called out a bit loudly. Kouha smacked his hand over Judar's mouth, the magi smacking his hand away. "What the hell?"

"Quiet," Kouha shushed with his finger. "Did you see Haku?"

"Of course I do," he snorted. Although still a little loud, it was still quieter than before. "She's sitting right there, doing whatever she does."

"No, I mean before in the room. Did you see…" Kouha bend over so that he could be as close to Judar's ear as he could, "Her body?"

"Nah," Judar said. "Nothing good, anyway."

Groaning, Kouha smacked his hand against his face. It was like trying to talk to a child, and he knew his share of mental people. Shaking that thought aside, he was about to correct him when he noticed Kohaku lift her head from whatever she'd been writing and gaze towards the entrance. She closed her journal a second before the doors opened and his brother En entered with Kougyoku, Sousei, and Suisei following behind him.

The twins, at seeing Kohaku, sprinted past Kouen and Kougyoku to reach her. Both launched themselves against her chair almost toppling it over. Kohaku tried reaching out to the desk to stabilize it before all three of them fell over but kept missing the edge. Thankfully, Kouen reached the back of the chair and brought it down on all four legs. The twins didn't let go of Kohaku even when she patted their backs to do so.

"Let her breath," Kouen called. It took his word for them to put some space between themselves. Kohaku gazed up at the twins as the two stared back at her. Their eyes were still puffy and red; Suisei's cheeks were tinted in red while Sousei had some stains remaining from crying. Seeing them like that tore her and she came up to embrace them again.

 _I'm sorry for leaving you alone like that._

She'd been so afraid of Masami that she became stupid enough to forget how Sui and Sou would feel alone by themselves. The two held tightly onto her, Sousei telling her that it was okay and Suisei saying that they understood.

Kouha watched from afar a bit confused. It wasn't until Kougyoku came by to sit beside him that she began to explain what had happened. The twins had been worried sick and it wasn't all from their mourning. They didn't believe that Kohaku would just up and leave them like that without saying a word. But they knew she'd be mourning on her own like she often did after any major battle.

"From what Sousei told me," Kougyoku whispered to her brother. "She hates it when they see her crying. It didn't stop them from looking though."

"How did you guys find us here?" Kouha asked.

His sister smiled and ran her hand through Judar's hair as he laid across their laps, his head on hers. "Kouen onii-sama found us. Told them about knowing where she was but not to be too judgemental about her leaving." She giggled to herself a bit at that. "When onii-sama said that, Sousei got so feisty saying that they would never do that." At finishing, she tilted her head their way. Suisei had brought a chair closer to sit on and rest her head on Kohaku's shoulder while Sousei sat on the floor with his head on her lap. "It's heartwarming...how close they are."

Kouha couldn't deny them that. "Yeah, they are." He reached over and took Kougyoku's hand in his, holding it tightly. "But so are we." Kougyoku blinked a bit startled but smiled wide and tightened the hold on his hand too.

Things like these...they weren't bad. Having each other to shoulder any burden that any of them could come across. Knowing that they would be there regardless of the situation.

Kouha had to grow to learn this.

Kougyoku had to grow to learn this.

Judar had yet to learn.

Kouen and Koumei had each other since the beginning but they were learning to give this to their younger brother and sister. But they could very well take note from how close those three were.

"You think…" Suisei sniffled and buried her face against Kohaku's shoulder. "You think they're in heaven?"

"They're just gone, Sui," Sousei added in a mumble.

" _No, they've gone back."_

"Back?" the two repeated.

" _To the flow."_ Kohaku grimaced at mentioning this but continued to explain, wanting for them to know what she'd learned a long time ago about those who died. _"It's where all rukh comes from—where we're born—and where we'll all go back to eventually."_

"Mom and dad…" Suisei said. "They're there now?"

She nodded. _"They've become part of something much bigger, a part of our world and everything in it. Everything it can be. They'll be watching over us now from there."_

"You believe this?" Sousei asked unable to do so himself.

Again, she nodded. _"Someone told me long ago that those who die don't really leave us. They go back to where all rukh goes to. From where they'll come back eventually. It's a cycle of life that continues and will continue till the end of time. And when our time comes, we will go with them too."_

"That sounds—" Suisei sniffled, unable to finish her sentence.

"Nice," Sousei finished, holding onto Kohaku's waist.

" _It does."_

And for once since the day before, she felt some relief. Relief at knowing that mere fact. Two people had taught her that: the first, a strange man, the other not so much. But they were some of the few persons she had innately trusted somehow. And their words stuck to her and gave her hope. Subsequently, it allowed her to put aside the grieve and let her spread that hope to others.

And right now, hope was the best they had to gain.

* * *

It was impossible not to sigh for the hundredth time. His patience was lofty but certainly not high enough to tolerate seven people in studies Kouen was so accustomed to having empty. The reason he used the West studies and libraries more often than the ones in the East was because there were suppose to be less people to bother him there.

Certainly tonight, though, peace was far from the schedule. Kouha and Kougyoku were busy talking with the twins and in a rather loud volume. Koumei was speaking with Kohaku but that conversation at least remained somewhat quiet on her side.

But thinking of her reminded him of a puzzling issue: her lip. He overheard the questions from Sousei and Suisei about it, but she only mentioned having cut herself by accident during training. And although they believed her, it was obvious for him to spot the lie she'd concocted. After all, she trained with him in the outdoor barracks or with Seijin at the training grounds. And for two days straight already she had missed both.

It was obvious to him that she was hiding something. Aside from the noisiness, it was enough of a distraction in and of itself. He was so out of sorts that he didn't notice who approached him, much less the hand that gently came to his shoulder.

His head jerked a bit to it and caught a dainty hand marred in callouses. Crimson eyes tinted gold followed the arm connected to it before coming to meet stark blue eyes. Kohaku retracted her hand with a crooked smile on her lips. Instantly his attention was drawn to her lower lip, a bit swollen and the cut scabbing already.

Raising her hands, she motioned out the door. _"We're all leaving."_

This got him to blink a couple of times before glancing towards the door. Like she said, Kouha, Judar, and Kougyoku were leaving with the twins behind them, whatever their idle chat had been still continuing. Koumei stopped mid-yawn and turned back to her and Kouen. "Indeed you are. You saw need to tell me, why again?"

She wrung her hands before signing, _"It's late. Shouldn't you rest?"_

"It's fine." He waved dismissively at her before going back to stare at his scroll. "You should be on your way. It's been a long day."

His words, although somewhat haughty, had some semblance of empathy and it heartened her. In an eerie way, they did. She smile and nodded before catching up to Koumei and leaving with him after the group. They were almost out of the study when Kohaku stopped.

Seeing this, Koumei turned to her with a tilt of his head. "Something the matter, General?" Awkwardly, Kohaku exchanged glances between the door and the man they had left behind by himself. She did this a couple of times but they were enough to make Koumei understand. "He stays there most nights. If by any chance he doesn't leave to sleep, I'm sure to send him of. There isn't a need to worry."

A part of her couldn't help but do so, though. After hearing Sousei and Suisei talking about how Kouen had found them himself that evening and brought them to her, she felt too obligated not to be concerned. Well, obligation was a small part of what kept her in place. The other was that small _thing_ she had sworn off that still lingered in her.

"If you want…" Koumei suggested with a small hesitance. "Perhaps, if you want, you could stay."

" _We've intruded enough for the night, don't you think?"_

A shrug was what he gave for an answer. "From what he's said, your presence seldom bothers him. It's more your words."

Kohaku raised an eyebrow at that. _"Excuse me?"_

Koumei scoffed at having let that slip. "Go ask him if you're upset about that." A yawn escaped him again and he turned about ready to follow the rest. "I'll be sure to inform your siblings so they won't worry."

He didn't wait for her response and instead continued on to follow the group. Exchanging a glance between the door and the back of the study, she struggled to decide whether or not to go back. Her mind was flooded with 'what ifs' that pulled her inch by inch towards the door to follow behind them. But it took a small one to due the complete opposite.

 _What if I regret not returning?_

She already regretted plenty; today had reminded her just how deep those regrets were and how much they still haunted her. There wasn't about to be another tally on that list. Damning what consequences came for acting on impulse, she turned about and went back. For once...she would do what she wanted. If only this once.

* * *

"I thought you said you were off to rest."

Kohaku shrugged her shoulders and flashed him a crooked smile. _"I left as a courtesy. Truth be told, I'm not particularly tired. But if it's a bother…"_

He stared for a few seconds before going back to his scroll. "I don't see why it would be."

 _I'll take that as a yes._

Going towards the back, she retrieved her journal before coming back to the front. Taking a chair, she came to the desk he was on and sat across from him. Seeing as it was bothersome to light more candles, she opted instead for using the ones he already had on. Taking her feather pen from behind her ear, she reached over for a vial of ink before turning the pages of the journal and beginning to write on it.

Nothing apart from the crackling of the candlelight and the scribbling of her pen was heard in the room. From time to time, he would gaze down at her. Incredibly, she went on about her writing seemingly undisturbed. She would write then stop briefly to swipe the feather's tip against her cheek or lips before continuing.

After a few times of seeing this, his curiosity got the best of him. "What do you write?"

The question got her to lift her gaze from the journal. As if conscious now that he had asked, she placed her pen down in a way that the feather covered the page sideways. _"Nothing."_

The answer bothered him but not as much as her using her hands did. "You know," he began with a sigh as he placed his scroll down on the desk. "There's no one here but us. You can talk."

Her eyes skimmed the area—if out of concern or habit, he couldn't tell. When she finally assured herself that they were indeed alone, she took a deep breath. "I don't like how it sounds," she pointed out. Although barely above a whisper, the hoarseness of it made it easier to hear.

That certainly reminded him of something else. Reaching down, he grabbed his sheathed sword and laid it across the desk with Phenex's Metal Vessel within clear view. "It's something fixable."

"Now?" she asked, incredulous.

"It's the middle of the night." He unsheathed it halfway and held it against the candlelight, seemingly interested at the sheen of the blade. "No one will hear." Placing it back in its scabbard, he motioned at the window with a nod of his head, "It's still raining, after all."

True but it was still risky.

" _No regretting, remember?"_

When put that way, it was easy to listen. Taking the carnation hairpin from the last page and putting it in place, she closed the journal and took her chair so that she could sit across from him. Not needing to unsheath the sword itself, Kouen held the blade by its scabbard and pointed the hlit at her. The metal ornament fell before her.

Instinctively, she reached her hands and cradled the cold metal ornament in her hands. Once seeing her firmly grasping it, he called upon Phenex without a word. The coral-colored wings of a small bird sprouted and cradled against her throat like a necklace. Feeling a bit odd, she lifted her chin and exposed her neck further to Phenex's touch.

" _What do you see?"_ he asked his djinn.

" _Damage."_ The wings moved around further, some sinking through the skin. _"It seems somewhat extensive. Scarred but can be repaired. I just need to search for it."_

Kohaku shuddered at the odd sensation. "That felt...strange."

" _My king,"_ Phenex called. _"Keep her talking, please. It allows me to see which vocal chords aren't working."_

Great. Idle chat. But if it made his job easier at fixing something that had been broken for so long, then what harm would a chat do? He scanned their surroundings quickly for some topic to easily talk about. His eyes instantly came to her journal and the carnation hairpin. Nostalgia hit him again at seeing such a similar piece to another he'd seen years ago.

"Where did you obtain that hairpin?"

"Hairpin?" she asked, her voice stuttering at the odd sensations that still came from Phenex.

"The one in your journal."

Her head lowered to make it easier to see the journal from across the desk where she'd left it. Her eyes lingered on it for a few seconds before answering, "It was a gift."

"From?"

"...a person that was dear to me."

Was. That told him plenty. "How did they pass?"

"I don't know." As she talked, Kouen noticed that the hoarseness was starting to go away. It was mild but noticeable seeing as her whispers actually sounded like they were supposed to, and also by the fact that he could hear the strain in her voice from talking about this. "No one bothered to tell me even when I asked. They didn't care enough to find out, either."

Silence came quickly after that. It proved to be a bad place to start. Then again, how was he supposed to know that it would remind her of that?

" _Perhaps being a bit more tactful might help,"_ Phenex suggested, speaking out of line from her healing.

" _How is it coming along, Phenex."_

" _I've mended a few but the process will be lengthy. Surely not something that can be done in one sitting, my king."_

Lengthy and unable to fix at once. That was just fantastic. _"How much can you fix?"_

" _I will need to find them first. However many I manage to fix will depend on how long you wish to allow of me to mend."_

He sighed and sat back against his chair. Kohaku blinked and swallowed down as the process continued. "Something wrong?"

"It doesn't seem to be something fixable ri—"

"I told you." Kouen glared at her for interrupting. She chuckled and cleared her throat. "I'll just—you were saying?"

"It'll take a couple of sessions to heal you properly." His hold on the sheath faltered but he held onto it firmly when it began to fall. "But it is fixable."

She sighed but it wasn't relief that he heard. "Not much use it'll do, anyway."

That pessimism of hers was starting to irritate him. "You're awfully bleak when it comes to this for being so stubborn where everything else is concerned."

"Well, I have my rea—" She covered her mouth at that but it hadn't been because she'd let those words out inadvertently—at least it didn't seem to be the reason why. Her voice rose a small pitch, and although mildly hoarse, it sounded feminine.

" _That did something,"_ Phenex said with a small chuckle.

Kohaku let go of the metal ornament before reaching down to her scar. She took a few breaths before speaking again. "I-I've never...heard myself like this."

Neither had he.

No...he had. But it had been ten years ago when she used to sing and preach at the top of her lungs. Although he remembered it somewhat higher than this, it was the same voice; the same tone of the girl that used to preach nonsense about peace and whatnot when spending time with Prince Hakuyuu and Prince Hakuren.

He even recalled telling Prince Hakuyuu about what he thought of her ramblings. _"It's not nonsense, Kouen."_ There had been some sort of sympathetic gleam in his eyes as he said this. _"I've heard the same of those people we safe from the battlefield, the women and children that are left homeless and helpless. And only then from a handful who still keep hope despite the bleakness of their lives. It astounds me, actually. They don't have what we do and yet they stand by their beliefs. They're unlike us in many ways. Yet what makes them akin to us is that they see the world not for what it is, but for what it could be."_

Surprisingly, that helped Kouen define the woman that sat before him now. Aside from her folly of unconditional love, she envisioned the world as it could be. And by doing so, it made her capable to face the world as it already was.

"You've been indulgent of peace and yet you are adamant of becoming a general. Even before today and your father's passing, your siblings and yourself—you wanted the same: to have you leading. Why is that?"

The question took her by surprise. Lowering the ornament from its place, the coral-colored bird disappeared as her gaze became askance. "It's something I wonder myself sometimes. Leading...isn't really what I want to do. At least not this way." At seeing the raised eyebrow he gave her, Kohaku chuckled and shook her head. "Don't misunderstand, I do it gladly. But the only reason I can is because I have the power necessary to do so with Beleth and Marbas; they provided me this opportunity. But I mostly do it because they believe me capable of doing so. If they have faith in me, then I have faith I can meet their expectations."

Kouen shook his head as he himself lowered his sword onto the desk, drawing the ornament away from her. "You're defining yourself based on the beliefs of others. That's a stance with a poor foundation and it'll break beneath you one day."

"And I'm sure that day will come." She smile and began wringing her hands. "I'm well aware...that my thought process isn't the best. I'm aware of the faults it has, of the faults I possess. But I carry with me the hope that by being part of the grandness of our nation that this will mean being part of something bigger than myself. That I'll be able to leave some sort of legacy—that those I leave behind will be able to move along even after I'm gone."

Her foot came up to the edge of chair and she held it against her chest, unconsciously. "It's frightening to think that the possibility of being forgotten exists. It continues to be till this day. But it's also somewhat...relieving."

"How do you mean?" he asked.

She took a deep breath but didn't speak. Instead she exhaled and shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. It just feels right to think so." With that thought, Kohaku chuckled, letting her foot drop while her hands came to grab at the edge of her chair. "The only thing that's ever defined it for me was what Prince Hakuyuu told me once: 'everyone shall sit under their own vine and fig tree, and no one shall make them afraid—'"

"They will be safe in the nation we have made," Kouen said, speaking the words he remembered well from the late prince.

Kohaku smiled warmly at hearing him speak such memorable words with her. They hadn't just touched her alone. "When he told me this, I wished to do as he said in the nation they made—the one we are still making even after they're gone. It's what I wish for, the one thing that truly belongs to me. I wish to see the people of this nation and those I love most and hold dearest to my heart—the people I've come to love with every breath of my being—to one day be able to have a moment in the shade under their own vine and fig tree, at home in the nation we make."

Her words echoed through the quiet room and lingered in his head. Nonsense. He heard nonsense like before and yet he understood it somehow. Koumei and he always thought the best way to unify the world was through the military prowess of their country. And yet he understood what drove those who followed her to be loyal. In a way, he could also understand what djinn recognized in her.

Tenacious. Dauntless. Willing. Perceptive. Passionate. Eloquent.

"You have quite a way with words."

"I do?" She chuckled, her fingers lingering up to her lips and her cheeks dusted slightly in pink under the candlelight. "No one's said that to me before. If I recall correctly, wasn't it you who said that I talk too much for a mute girl?"

"No," he said with a smirk of his own. "I said you talked too much for someone with no voice. Now that you're getting it back, I see where it comes from."

"Ha ha," she mocked him but regretted it when she bit down on her tongue that was still healing from the night prior. Her fingers pressed against her lip out of instinct but that just made it hurt more as she accidently pressed her cut lip. She hissed as she lightly touched it to assure it wasn't bleeding.

That brought his attention back to what had been bothering him for a long while now. Without thinking much, he reached his hand out and cradled her jaw, his thumb coming across her lower lip gently. Dumbfounded as she was, Kohaku could barely move. Wide eyes stared at him as he gazed at her cut lip. "How did this happen?"

Her brain, not working properly, went with the default excuse she'd been giving anyone who asked about it. "Training."

That made him scoff, catching her right on the lie. "Now, I would believe that if I didn't know you have missed training for the past couple of days. That and the fact that this is fresh. A couple days fresh."

The color seemed to vanish a bit from her face at this. But her mind was quick to concoct another lie. "I don't always train with others."

"Stop lying." Her hands reached up to the hand still on her face and tried prying it off. It wouldn't budge, though, despite his grip not tightening much. "What happened to you?"

"Look, whatever happened, happened. I'm over it and it's healing. I'll be fine." Her fingers finally pried at his and took his hand off of her. Pulling it down, she unconsciously held onto it tightly as the next words spilled. "What the hell does it matter to you, anyway?"

The subject appeared dicey and it made her shoot her mouth off. Every word laced in light spite and defensiveness. Hearing her so feisty about it finally got to him. For once, he let himself answer without thinking.

"I care. Is it that complicated to understand?"

She shrieked but kept her mouth closed, the noise just coming out as she shot up from her sit. "Yes, it is. I can't understand why you keep asking. Why can't you just ignore it like everybody else?"

"It's aggravating to think others are blind enough to not notice that something isn't right," he replied raising his voice slightly. He swore, someone should congratulate her for being the first to make him snap so foolishly. "What makes it even worse is that you don't seem to care."

That itself snapped something in her too as her nostrils flared slightly and her eyes widened. "Where the hell is everyone getting the idea that I don't care?" But she didn't just stop there and her voice started to raise in volume. "All I've ever _done_ is care! I'm the one living through this! Doesn't that show I care? Doesn't it show I feel horrible? That I would give anything—do anything if I could just make things right?!"

At that point, Kouen stopped as caught off guard as he was. This clearly wasn't about her cut lip anymore. It was clear, at least to him, that she'd gone off on a tangent of her own accord. Triggered by something he'd said. "You're not making—"

"I've done everything and anything in my power to make things right! Yet this feeling just stays, it doesn't go away. I still feel like I'm drowning in air—like I'm alive just to rectify something unamendable!" she shouted. Wanting to calm her down, he reached a hand out to her shoulder but she swiftly slapped it away. "Don't! I'm sick of people putting me down. Tired of them not seeing—not noticing—" Out of the blue, she held tightly onto her own arms, her knuckles turning white. Out of frustration, out of desperation. Her hissing soon turned to sobbing as she began to rub her hands up and down. Choking on her uneven breaths, she stopped all at once and buried her face in her hands. "...why doesn't anybody notice it's _me_?"

At that point, her sobbing was more than audible. Whatever she'd gone off on a tangent on had been penting up for a long time. That much he could tell from how she so easily snapped and came apart. Like it'd been in such a delicate balance that just the feather weight of his one sentence tore everything apart into shreds. Everything fell apart and she just followed suit.

It pained him to see her like that. So...broken. Reaching out slowly, he placed his hand on her shoulder. When she didn't as much as react, he pulled her in and simply held her as she cried. It felt uncomfortable. The few times he'd done anything like this was when he was younger with his siblings and even then it still didn't feel right. But that odd feeling was squandered when she meekly reached around to hold him as she continued to weep. Her weak hold trembled as she spent herself in tears.

He didn't know how long it lasted. What was worse was that he didn't know what else to do. But it seemed that as the minutes continued to pass, her sobs started to lessen and her grip tightened at regaining some strength.

Soon only small snivels came to his ears. She was spent. Pulling back and letting go of him, she wiped at her face with the heels of her hands. They kept rubbing and rubbing as if wanting to erase from her head whatever heaviness had caused her to break down. "I-I'm...sorry," she croaked with a snivel. "I shouldn't have—gods, that was pathetic of me. I'm so very sorry you had to see that."

"Why are you apologizing?" he whispered. She rubbed at one eye as she lifted her gaze to meet his as from the other tears came. Not caring about what she'd say, he cradled her face again, this time to wipe her eye with his thumb.

She scoffed at his question. "Why are you being so caring out of—"

Her ears caught the click of his tongue the second she started the question. What stopped her from finishing it was Kouen pulling her face forward and pressing her lips against his. The action caught her off guard and at first she tried to pull away but the hand at her waist kept her in place. It wasn't until he parted her lips with his tongue that she finally gave up. She simply stopped struggling and gave in.

It was only after she let herself go that the small blossom from before returned with fervor. The small relief it brought at just being set free gave her a little bit of reprieve as well. It'd been so hard to breath—so hard to keep going on by herself—that she could recognize the bliss that just these few seconds gave her. Just for this brief moment, it made breathing just a tiny bit easier.

But a part of her pulled her back and made her seize his hand from her face. Reality struck her as fast as the bliss from the one kiss did. Even worse, it struck harder. "I can't…"

"Can't what?"

"Whatever made you—us do this. I can't—you're marrying my sister, for heaven's sake." Unable to believe what she'd just done, she covered her mouth with her hands and took a deep breath.

"It can work. My father—"

She scoffed at even hearing him mentioning the late emperor. Most notoriously because of the ramifications he was clearly implying. "Let me guess, concubine?" Kohaku sneered and shook her head. "Thank you but no. I'm degraded enough by her to have you also look down on me." Wiping at her eyes to clean herself, she hurried over to the other side of the desk to pick up her journal.

Her fingers brushed against the carnation hairpin for a brief second. _"Don't do this to yourself. Don't push him away."_

 _I can't listen to you. Not on this._

"I hope this doesn't affect how we have come to cooperate. I really...hold you in high esteems. I don't wish for that to change." Taking a quick bow, she held the journal close to her chest, "If you'll excuse me."

With that said, she dashed out of the study without looking back. She sprinted the whole way back to her room and made sure to enter as quietly as possible. Thankfully, it was empty. It was late but she didn't feel like sleeping. Too many things had happened that day.

She held the journal close, the carnation hairpin closer. And like a whisper, she could hear her voice.

" _Why did you do that?"_

Fear caught her tongue for an instant but she would never not reply to her voice. "Masami's marrying him. I'd like to be something more than just a mistress someday." That thought made her scoff and cradle the journal tighter as she brought her legs closer to her chest. "I doubt I'll live long enough to see that day, though."

" _She won't kill you."_

"You're right," Kohaku answered. "She'll just let others do it for her. Believe me, when the day comes everyone knows the truth—and trust me, it'll come—no one will have mercy on me. It's easier to hate than to forgive." She took a deep breath to calm herself, "Masami is a clear example."

" _I forgave you."_

Kohaku smiled at that but knew those words to be empty. She'd done too much—taken so much already—that there was no way real her would forgive Kohaku that easily. For everything that she didn't know, Kohaku was sure that she, out of everybody else, would have more of a reason to never forgive her.

"I doubt you understand what it means to forgive me. You'd be forgiving your murderer."

" _No. I'd be forgiving a girl who didn't know better. One who needs a second chance—"_

Tired of hearing nonsense, Kohaku shoved the journal away under her pillow. No longer in contact, her voice faded from her head after a few seconds.

Finally there was quiet.

 _I hate the quiet._

There was no way she would be forgiven. A person like her, that did what she had done, didn't deserve such thing as a second chance. No.

What she could hope to do before the truth came out was all she had left. It was better if she worked and instead left something behind. Something that others would see and say 'she made this happen', 'she was a part of this.'

Something that people would look and say 'Reizei Kohaku made a difference.'

At least that way, she would leave a legacy behind. That way, the name 'Reizei Kohaku' wouldn't be forgotten. Not like 'Ceara' had.

* * *

The following day didn't bring much of anything better. Early that next morning, the four siblings gathered in Masami's parlor to receive their father's will. It would've been an understatement to say that they were nervous. Sousei and Masami showed it the least but by the incessant shuffling of his feet, Kohaku could tell that he was overly anxious about what their parents had left behind. Suisei kept clapping her hands as she paced the room, more obviously tense. Kohaku was the least agitated of them all, mostly because she could guess what the will had.

Sousei will be head of the household.

Either Masami or Sousei will gain the title of General of the Southern Subjugation Army.

And Suisei and herself would be relegated to stand back and care for the household and for Shika.

 _It's how it's supposed to be._

Masami unfolded the scroll and took a deep breath before starting. All four became a bit teary at hearing their father's last farewells. From the sound of it, they must've written it some time before he passed away. The letter mentioned how their assets would be divided amongst the four and how they would be expected to care for Shika just as he had when it was given to him to govern.

" 'And at last, I can hereby leave my only son, Sousei, as Head of the Reizei Household. Despite being less than forthcoming, son, I know you to have the strength and capacity to guide this family to the future'."

Reaching a hand to Sousei's shoulder, Kohaku squeezed tightly, knowing how much those words weighed him down. Sousei reached his hand over to touch hers before he took a deep breath and let what they all saw coming settle.

It was after seeing him calm again that Masami continued. " "And, when the time arises, you will take possession of my position as general. But you are yet to be suited enough to carry that weight on your shoulders. For the time being, I will leave your sister...Kohaku—' Wait, what is the meaning of this?"

 _What?_

"He left Haku-nee...with his position?" Suisei inquired unable to believe it. By how quiet it was, it appeared none of them did.

Her eyes scanned the letter quickly through before Masami brought her eyes to her. Instinctively, Kohaku shook her head vehemently. _"I had no idea he changed his will."_

"I did." They all turned to Sousei who let his head fall. Taking a deep breath, he lifted it and met their gazes. "He had been contacting me for the past month, ever since Suisei and I first talked to the First Prince about Haku-nee's position. The last response I received mentioned that he would consider what Prince Kouen told him about her. It must've been something good enough to change his mind."

It didn't surprise Kohaku that Masami was the first to disprove. "She cannot."

The twins, perplexed at her, called out in unison, "Why not?"

"She may have djinn but it's much more sensible for you to lead, Sousei," she said. "You know how the world will treat her if she's officially declared father's replacement until you're capable enough. They will belittle her and negate any voice she may have in the war council."

Kohaku couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at the irony. _And that's different from how you treat me, how exactly?_ But she kept that to herself. It was the smart thing to do if she wanted to keep her head between her shoulders.

"You can't go against it, though!" Suisei declared jumping from her place and standing up toe to toe against Masami. Sousei and Kohaku stared wide eyed and mouth gaping at the sudden outburst. Suisei was loud but she rarely stood her ground on any given stance. This seemed to tick her off enough to do so. "It's father's will. We have to abide by his last words. The only people who can negate the decision are Sousei or the Imperial Family."

Masami pursed her lips not wanting to argue. Instead, she turned to Sousei. Suisei did the same and the sudden scrutiny made him shrink in place. Turning to Kohaku, she could see he was pleading for help. But as much as she wanted to, she knew that sticking her neck too much would cost her one way or another.

" _I know it's hard, Sousei,"_ she signed at him with a smile. _"But I can't give my opinion on the matter. I'm biased on this. You'll have to decide from the arguments they've given you."_

She heard him swallow but he turned to his sisters that now stood in opposing sides. It only took him a few minutes before he faced Masami and gave his decision. "Father taught us that his decisions came from experience. I understand your concerns but I will trust and honor his final wishes, Masami. Unless otherwise stated by the General Commander, Kohaku will take father's place as General of the Southern Army."

The air tensed considerably. Kohaku feared having to lift her eyes to meet Masami's. It wasn't until she spoke that they all did. "I understand. I won't argue if that is your final word. As you said we must honor father's word. And as head of our household, we must honor yours as well."

Despite the small happiness that Suisei showed through a smile, neither Kohaku nor Sousei felt like this had been a win. These new roles would be putting strains on them now more than ever. If their family was cracked before, with this it could very likely fracture into factions.

The grace of all that was mighty saved them from the awkward silence when a couple of knocks came to the door. All heads turned and it wasn't until Sousei called for whomever had knocked to enter that Seijin came in. Apparently not as dense as he appeared to be, he stepped in but immediately tensed up.

"Am I interrupting?" he asked, his voice slightly shaking.

Sousei sighed and pressed his fingers against the bridge of his nose. "No. I'm to assume you came in for a reason?"

"Y-Yes." Kohaku found it hard to believe Seijin's sudden sheepishness. He must have really felt how bad the mood was. "The General Commander has requested a meeting with Miss Kohaku and yourself, Lord Sousei."

At hearing this, Kohaku had to try really hard to keep her groan from being heard. Sleep had completely evaded her the night prior because of what had happened in the study. And that this was happening now really wasn't helping either.

" _Did he say what it was about?"_

"No, miss," Seijin replied a bit more at ease that it was Kohaku talking to him. "Just that it was urgent."

"Urgent?" Sousei sighed after repeating the word, his shoulders slumping down as he turned to Kohaku. "I'm already looking forward to it."

All she could do was give him a grim grin as an answer. _"We should see what he wants instead of dragging this further along."_

"You're right." He turned back to Masami and Suisei, "We'll finish this after we return." Seeing their gazes askance, he sighed again this time out of concern. "I don't want to sound bossy, you guys. I'm trying my best here. So, let's try straightening this when we get back, yeah?"

A smile formed on Suisei's lips and she nodded in acceptance. Masami took a deep breath before nodding. Although the mood was still pretty thick for anybody to really breath in there, it felt just a tiny bit better with his words. Leaving them with that, Sousei and Kohaku left being escorted by Seijin to the council room where they had been summoned to.

Once outside the council room, Kohaku stopped briefly. There definitely needed to be some space between them after what had happened last night but like she had said, she didn't want it to get in between what they were trying to accomplish as fellow citizens—fellow generals—of their country. She would swallow her emotions for twenty minutes. The only good thing was that this time she wouldn't be speaking and it would at least help with keeping herself in check.

The three of them entered to find the council room occupied already with others. Aside from Kouen, Koumei, and the Household Members of both, Kouha and his captains were also there.

 _Generals._

A simple glance from Sousei told her that he caught that little tad bit as well. This was about all of them—this meant a siege of a larger scale than usual.

"Nice of you to join us." Koumei's comment didn't go past her mind, especially with the amount of sarcasm it had.

"We apologize for the wait," Sousei replied. "Our father's will—"

"We are aware of its arrival." It was hard not to feel a chill run down her spine at hearing Kouen's deep baritone voice from across the room. "Is it safe to surmise that you are here as head of the Reizei Household?"

"Yes. And my sister was appointed as my father's replacement. That is if your highnesses have no issues with the designations."

For a brief second, Kohaku lifted her head and inadvertently met Kouen's burning gaze. Her stark blue eyes met crimson tinted gold and for a moment her breath stopped. Emotions from last night rushed into her until she forced herself to remember where she was.

 _Right now is not the time._

It most definitely wasn't. Taking an inconspicuous long breath, she let her emotions leave for the moment and met his gaze evenly. At hearing the calm exhale he gave, she blinked and saw a faint...something—some glint in his eyes before he turned to Sousei. "None whatsoever." He motioned then for Koumei to start the meeting.

The two of them had been right at guessing why they were there. This wasn't a simple invasion. They planned to attack and capture Magnostadt. From her studies of other countries around the world, she had paid extra attention when learning about the global superpowers that governed over the rest.

The Kou Empire was a part of the triad that she dubbed the 'Three Great Powers' of their time. The Reim Empire was the oldest of the three. The third and last was the youngest rivaling Kou, the Kingdom of Sindria. By far the most impressive, she had to admit. It was a kingdom built out of the forces of a single man, the king and a legend of their time.

Other powers—equally as terrifying—consisted of smaller kingdoms, most of which had already converged with Sindria and were part of the Seven Seas Alliance. Ever since their establishment, the three nations had wanted to attain the most strength to overpower the rest. Ultimately, she supposed the goal was to obliterate the rest until only one stood. Despite this overwhelming pressure, some refuse to join this race of arms.

This last category was where Magnostadt fell.

A self-proclaimed independent government since the magicians overthrew the late regime, Magnostadt stood as a country built by magicians, for magicians. From what she read, entrance was often reserved to magicians and those who weren't had to be there on some type of national business or other.

They were the most advanced in magic tools, something that she learned both from the books and first hand after the battle at Hakucho, and were protected well by the staff and students of their prestigious school.

And yet the more Koumei spoke, the more Kohaku understood the need to attack. If anymore time was allowed to pass, Magnostadt would take the first step. As ready and capable as they were, it wouldn't be far fetched to think that they could land a solid hit against the Kou Empire. And that would not be counting the fact that the usage of magic wasn't very well known or accepted in the far east. Few, if any, of their soldiers would know what they would be up against.

So they explained the situation and how the plan was set out to be.

"Kouha will take the vanguard and commenced the siege through the northern plains." As Koumei explained this, he moved pieces across a map to better illustrate his plan. "General Kohaku will take the Southern Army and reach Balbadd through fleets."

"Fleets, your highness?" Sousei inquired.

Kohaku smiled, proud that he had the courage to ask for clarification even among a room full of experienced strategists and generals.

 _He's willing to learn. That's the first step._

Raising her hands, Kohaku signed and answered his question. _"It's to cut them off at sea. Magnostadt is close to the western shores, a vast sea separating it from Reim. If by chance there's an alliance or interference by the Reim Empire, us moving through Balbadd and cutting off any contact by shore will be wise. But I'm assuming this is more of a precaution?"_

The inquisition made Koumei nod in agreement. "The majority of your battalion will remain at sea to do just as you assumed. The rest will make way from Balbadd and take Magnostadt through its southern borders." Koumei turned slightly to Kouen, "My brother and king will arrive through the east with his household members."

 _They'll be literally cornered off._

If executed to perfection, the siege would be a success with the least amount of casualties. And everyone understood this. If successful, this would be a major step in continuing their spread to the west.

Dates were swiftly assigned. The Southern Army would leave in a couple of days seeing as the voyage, even through the southern sea borders of Kou territory, would take a most two weeks. The vanguard would leave a few days after seeing as their trek would be more arduous yet less extensive.

 _Couple days. It'll be a tight squeeze for discussions._

"Will you be taking Lord Sousei as your second-in-command, General?" Koumei asked wanting to know every bit of information available.

She nodded. _"I'll be taking both as my right-hand men, your highness."_

"Suisei as well?" he added.

" _They are capable. As am I, now."_ There was no more questioning on that front. It amazed her how wrong Masami's words have been. Aside from the snobby lower class strategists, those who mattered took her word for what it was worth. And she supposed that personally knowing most of the people present also helped gain their confidence in her abilities.

It took a few hours for the council meeting to end. Everybody was aware of their tasks and seeing the limited amount of time they had, it prompted quick action before departure.

Once by themselves, Sousei and Kohaku walked back with Seijin following closely behind them. Two days before departure; that left little time to do much. But they would mange like they always did.

"I'll go announce it the battalion."

Kohaku nodded but stopped him when he almost rushed off to do so. _"Before you do that, let's tell Masami and Sui."_

Sheepishly smiling, he nodded. They went into Masami's parlor where the two were still at and broke the news as quickly but as thoroughly as they could. Thankfully, they understood and didn't reproach. Well, mostly.

"Away to Balbadd? By yourselves?" She became a bit paranoid in a way Kohaku had never seen her before. "Why can't I accompany you?"

"All fleets are battle bound. Only ours will stop at Balbadd's ports to let us continue the siege through the south. You aren't a soldier, Masami."

"I can still fight," she argued. "I've trained—"

"Yes, in self-defense. Not in actual combat." Sousei sighed, not wanting to have the conversation. "You are a great strategist but you will not survive out there. I'm not willing to put you at risk."

"But—" she stuttered, looking for an excuse. Anything, really, to convince him. But Kohaku saw the dilemma she faced. Masami was arguing against someone who thought very much like herself. It was a lost cause but that didn't stop her.

 _Then let's put something on the table you won't want to argue against._

" _Sousei is right, Masami."_ All eyes turned her way, a pair expectant and another glaring back at her. Nonetheless, she continued. _"This is a full on siege. We're expected to succeed. We cannot burden ourselves more than necessary."_

"Are you calling me a burden?" she asked, flabbergasted.

" _Yes. If you come with us, that's what you will be. But I agree with Sousei; none of us want to put you at risk of anything."_

And it wasn't a lie, either. Despite how much she hated her, Kohaku knew that wishing harm or worse on anybody shouldn't be done. So instead she hit her hard with the one thing that would certainly get her to agree as well. _"We already lost them, Masami. We don't want to risk losing you, too."_

Nothing but utter silence followed. Masami heaved a sigh and her shoulders slumped down, defeated. "I understand. I don't like it but...I understand."

Suddenly, this downtrodden expression came to her. She reached a hand out to Suisei and Sui responded by throwing herself into her embrace. Masami raised her other hand to Sousei and just like his twin, he walked into the embrace.

The only thing she could do was watch. But she didn't mind it. It elated her to see them so united even through the havoc and despair.

" **Hakuchi**."

Kohaku raised her head to meet the call the twins gave. Both smiled and reached a hand out each. In that moment, the mere gesture made her forget Masami's hate. For that moment, Masami seemed to forget it too. All they basked in now was their own company.

For a moment, they realized the only thing they had left in the world was each other. And that was enough.

* * *

"Everything is ready to go, miss Kohaku." Hearing this, Kohaku nodded at Seijin.

The two days had passed in a flash. Kohaku spent of that time putting things in order and ensuring that she would take what's essential for the voyage. Although it wasn't to say that she didn't enjoy a couple of hours with people she wouldn't be seeing for a while.

Two weeks at sea. That would be a journey on itself. They had yet to leave Rakushou but by leaving this early, even before the crack of dawn, they would surely reach the Southern ports by mid morning. The fleets were already in the process of preparing themselves and would surely be awaiting them to embark as soon as possible.

" _Let the battalion leave,"_ she told him. _"We'll catch up once I've finished here. And Seijin?"_

"Yes?"

" _You guide them."_

The request took him by surprise. "M-Miss? Are you sure that's a job for me?"

" _They know who you are. Hell, some have trained with you. They are more than aware that aside from my siblings, I have come to trust you. Make me proud, Jin."_

It astounded him still but he shook that aside for the moment. Standing straight, he nodded and saluted her before leaving. With everything ready, she just had to announce her leave to Kouen as their General Commander. It still stung to see him and she had done nothing but further the distance that night brought. She hated it and for once abhorred that she put her family's honor over what she wanted.

Deciding that it'd be best to simply get it over with, she headed into the council room where he and Koumei had been cooped up for most of the last few days.

A few knocks was all it took before she heard his deep baritone voice coming from the other side telling her to enter. Stepping into the room, though, she found it a tad more crowded than she thought it'd be.

It was some sort of family reunion. Aside from Kouen and Koumei, Kouha and Kougyoku were there too. But from how they fidgeted about and the rush she heard in their blood, something had them anxious.

" _Am I...interrupting?"_

"No." The answer was clear cut and quite unnerving. Whatever they had been talking about, they didn't appear to want her to hear about it. Kouen rose from his sit as did Koumei while Kouha and Kougyoku simply turned to face her. "Is all in order?"

" _Yes. Everything is accounted for, double checked by Seijin and Sousei. I have also sent the battalion on their way with Seijin. I'll be following after this with the twins."_

"Very well," he replied with a sigh. But then nothing. What the hell was he hesitating about? All of this was really starting to freak her out.

" _Is something the matter?"_

He didn't answer. Instead the younger siblings came forth with small but warm smiles. Kougyoku was first to speak, her voice timid and low.

"I hope and pray you have a safe trip, anegimi." She reached out to take her hand and squeezed it. Kohaku did the same and showed her a crooked smile. Unnerved by the atmosphere in general, anything that came out of them appeared off. That came true especially when Kouha stepped up.

The young prince averted his gaze but when he turned up to meet her eyes, he grimaced. At first she thought he was angry or mad at her for something but that notion left her mind when he threw himself and wrapped his arms around her. He squeezed a bit too hard and she forced herself to hide the ache from her expression. Three days had past and the wounds were mostly healed but there were some still recovering. Those still hurt to the touch.

Placing her hands on his shoulders, she pried his arms off and pulled him to arm's length gently. _"I'm worried now. This isn't like you."_

Kouha didn't affirm nor deny anything. Instead he simply lifted his head and pierced her with an adamant stare. "Be safe. I'll meet you on the other side of the battlefield."

The words were tender but his tone and slightly rapid heartbeat concerned her. Not wanting to worry either of them, she nodded and turned to both before saying, _"I'll see you on the other side. And don't worry, I won't die that easy."_ She patted both their heads before turning to the two older brothers and her higher officials. _"I'll be setting off now."_

Koumei nodded languidly, the same hesitance in his eyes as she'd seen in the others. With that affirmation at least, she lowered her gaze to meet the pair of crimson eyes tinted gold that hadn't stopped watching her since she came in. Before, back when she first arrived, she'd have thought the sight unnerving. Now she saw something else that she couldn't quite describe.

Giving a final nod, she turned and left the four alone in the council room.

The room remained quiet for a few seconds until Kouha faced his brother's with a furrowed brow, concern clearly etched on his face. "Did you see it?"

It was Koumei who nodded but didn't seem as concerned as Kouha seemed to be about the issue. "That could very well be remnants from sparring sessions, Kouha."

"But they're not just the bruises, Koumei onii-sama," Kougyoku spoke up, daringly. "Yesterday, I caught a glimpse of cuts that…"

Her cheeks became dusted pink. The discovery she spoke of happened the day before when she'd convinced Kohaku to share some time in the palace bathhouse. Nothing had seemed wrong at first. At least not til she saw the bruises Kouha had mentioned to her in private and the unusual cuts on her legs and chest. "I've seen how they are and I have witnessed training that results in injuries. I can vouch that whatever caused anegimi's wounds isn't from training."

"This isn't normal," Kouha repeated. "Don't tell me you don't find it suspicious? Weren't you looking for whoever poisoned her in the first place?"

Kougyoku's eyes widened at hearing that as she glanced between her brothers, questioningly. "P-Poisoned?!"

At irritated sigh came out of Kouen at that. Koumei averted his gaze and hid his mouth with his fan at Kouen's scrutiny. Even after explicitly asking for this to be kept between them, Koumei had talked to Kouha about it. He assumed this wouldn't spread further than that since Kouha wasn't the gossiping type. But in a fit of anger or to prove a point, he was known to go to extremes first and think about things later. Now Kougyoku knew.

Fantastic.

"It's nothing to be worried about," Koumei assured them. "That matter is thoroughly being looked into."

"You don't think whoever poisoned her has been doing much worse, do you?" Kougyoku whispered hastily, her mind racing with ludicrous ideas.

"Enough." Kouen's booming voice stopped all of them in their tracks. Once he had their attention, he continued. "If this is anything, it will be dealt with once we return."

The young prince and princess fidgeted about as if having much to say but not wanting to test their brother's patience. But seeing their worry didn't help, and he opted to alleviate it whichever way he could. "I'll be sure to look into this matter personally if it will put you at ease."

The two gave each other a side glance and nodded. Kouha grimaced that it would have to wait; he seriously hated when others got threatened or abused. But he trusted his brother En to be true to his word. So he remained quiet.

Kouen rose from his seat and gestured out to them. "Go prepare, Kouha. You are to leave the day after tomorrow."

There was no more room for arguments. Kouha saluted him and bowed. "Yes, my brother and king."

"And Kougyoku."

"Y-Yes!" she stuttered at being called upon.

"Don't speak about this to anyone."

There was a hint of uneasiness but she nodded in the end. "If it's what onii-sama thinks best, then I shan't."

"Good. Both of you are dismissed." The youngest siblings left together without another word. Kouen eyed Koumei again for having let that little bit of information escape.

His younger brother cleared his throat not wanting to irritate Kouen any further. "I kept my word up until a couple of days ago."

"Really?" Kouen asked, deadpan sarcasm overflowing from his voice.

"Kouha brought the subject about her injuries the morning after the funeral." Koumei tapped his chin with his fan. "Said he saw them by accident, didn't elaborate much on the how."

"What else?"

"They were fresh. And largely spread for the expense he saw of her stomach and rest of her body. It's also consistent to what Kougyoku saw during their interactions." He sighed and reached a hand behind his neck to rub at it. "You said she hasn't been to training?"

"Yes."

After the poisoning and her cut lip, he made sure to procure of Seijin the state of his master's whereabouts for as much as he could. The boy was meticulous at keeping records, especially with his memory. Although not privy as to why, Seijin made sure to detail every action the woman took. From the information he provided, Kouen was sure that not only did she not attend any kind of training but also rarely left her room even after their return from the expedition. Her contact with others was limited and it made the case even harder to pursue.

"Then perhaps their concern isn't misplaced," Koumei suggested. "At this point, it's null to retain the idea that a stranger is responsible. But I cannot fathom why she wouldn't defend herself, or more to the point, divulge the identity of whomever is harming her."

To Kouen, a few ideas did come to mind. None whatsoever pleasant. But that would be jumping to extreme conclusions and without clear evidence. He sighed, however, knowing that this wasn't what mattered at the moment.

"As we stand, there is no point in pursuing the search at the moment. Like I said to them, it will be suspended until we return."

Koumei nodded, "As you wish, my brother and king."

Although Kouen disliked the idea of putting this off with the injuries starting to outwardly manifest, there was no choice on the matter. Their troops were already sent forth and the siege would commence in a timely fashion; he would make sure of that. But if his suspicions were even remotely correct, then she would be safe away from the palace, at least.

* * *

" _The weapons of war are numerous, child. People and by extension the countries they establish, through their imaginative ways, create means to destroy one another, whether it be from the outside or from within. Sometimes two different ideologies clash and destroy each other. On other much more unfortunate times, it is from within that one falls._

 _Humans are a cunning species. Unlike other creatures in nature, they lie and deceive. They flaunt around showing kindness that they later betray to achieve their goals. Humans are seldom truthful under threat or harm's way. They have shown through history to take whatever and whichever means necessary to get what they desire. It is such ambition that has brought along the progression of mankind, but all the same it has also wrought ruin. Human behavior is an enigma that many have attempted to solve yet none have come close to any substantial answer._

 _Human life is almost analogous to conflict and strife. 'Almost' because, as much as there is war, there are also times of cursory peace. And it is that same momentum that guides towards a better tomorrow, one were 'almost' won't be such a far off dream. Change cannot be stopped. It flows like a current towards the sea where one could attempt to halt its progress. They might even succeed. But sooner or later, the water rises and floods through the obstacles towards the future. Change is the current in which all living things ride—humans, too. It is what many call the ever elusive "fate" of each and every living being on this earth._

 _But fate shouldn't be synonymous to fear or dread. It should be synonymous to hope and the future. A brighter tomorrow where all live better and in peace. A time where there is no longer a need to lie, to deceive. Where words spoken should not be something to distrust but instead be a form of bond, a show of promise. Foolish as it may sound, humans are not hopeless. They have ambitions, they have hopes, they have dreams. They are determined and they are strong. Someday they will see how much is wasted in conflict among each other. Someday it is my hope that they will realize there is much greater value in unity and amity among each other._

 _Apart, people may reach out with their hands and never touch a single speck of dust._

 _Together, they will help one another to reach the stars. "_

Kohaku stared at the one page of her journal. As idiotic as it seemed, she brought it along, as well as the carnation hairpin. But she never left it out of her sight. Aside from that, though, she liked reading the one page. After it had been gifted to her by that strange man what seemed like a like a lifetime ago, she made it a habit to read it anytime she felt downtrodden or when they would soon go to battle.

It, along with the contents she later added and still adds, is what made her hopeful. What make her remember the truth of her life. That despite the horrible things that she was a part of—that she'd done—there was still hope for the rest of the world. There was still hope for those she loved.

" _He was an odd one, wasn't he?"_

 _Yes, he was._ The strangest man ever. Despite his childish nature, he was a man of warm smiles. And the small amount of time they spent was peaceful. And, dare she say, it was that way because of his presence.

" _I wonder if we'll meet him again?"_

 _Who knows._

After meeting with people she'd lost contact for almost ten years now, she wondered if it was _fated_ for her to reunite with other old acquaintances.

" _Fate…"_ _Her_ voice became quiet, the thought echoing in Kohaku's mind. _"Do you believe in fate?"_

 _I believe in many things. So, in my own way, I guess I do._

" _Your own way, how?"_

It was a bleak definition. But in the end, she supposed it made sense. Certain things were destined. When people die and when people are born, for example. How long they lived and when they died was also predestined. What wasn't—what mattered—was how they decide to live, how they decide to die. One can live fighting all their lives and decide to die fighting. Others can live idly, never raising a finger against the injustices attacking them, and die all the same. Every person ended, it was up to each person how. That choice itself was free will.

" _I like that."_

Kohaku didn't. The only reason she believed it was because she had seen it too many times not to. She liked to believe in the words the man left her with. But she'd seen what fate really entailed. And she was a speck of dust among millions. Fate was something she couldn't change.

"Haku-nee?"

Hearing Suisei call to her, Kohaku turned about in her chair and met her pretty dark eyes. _"What is it?"_

"Can you come?" she giggled as she spoke this. "Our head of household's got issues keeping his lunch down."

" _Again?"_

"Yeah, half's gone overboard already."

It was hard not to chuckle but pity kept her in check. Following Suisei above deck, Kohaku blocked the rays of the sun away from her eyes as she breached the surface. It was midday and the sea breeze flew past them. The smell was relaxing. But as she neared the front of the ship, she began hearing the heaving of a certain twin.

"There he is." Suisei motioned at her brother who laid with his head perpetually over the edge of the boat. As the ship moved through the waves, she caught the sound of whatever was left in his stomach shift again and turning over as it threatened to escape. Suisei skipped over to him and rubbed at his back as Kohaku approached and did the same to his shoulder.

He heaved for a second before turning sideways to meet her. "I hate—" he stopped abruptly as bile rose to his throat. Kohaku grimaced at this since her heightened hearing didn't leave much to the imagination. He gulped it down and brought his head again overboard. "I hate sailing."

" _I know."_ Reaching up for her feather pen, Kohaku brushed the tip of it against his temple while calling Beleth forth. The small vibrations compensated for his out-of-balance notion and helped him breath without having to wait for bile to rise.

"Thanks."

" _It won't last,"_ she reminded him. _"Perhaps a nap will help?"_

"I can't. I'm supposed to be here, checking things and—ugh," he slumped his arms and head overboard, this time being overdramatic. "I hate my job."

"You hate it when you get sick like a sissy, Sou," Suisei pointed out as she leaned against the wooden rails to watch the horizon. "We're almost there. Hang in there, lil' bro." Kohaku turned sideways to watch as well and saw what she referred to. Peaking just over the horizon were buildings, bobbing in and out of view. If she was right, they would reach Balbadd in the next day or two.

Thankfully, the voyage had been mostly uneventful. Like it'd been said, the journey took approximately two weeks. It'd been hell for Sousei to travel for so long. It helped that Beleth alleviated some of the ailments but it did hinder his work a lot. Seijin was there to pick up the slack and she was grateful for that. Suisei tended to help more when sea creatures attacked but those had been few. As for Kohaku, she was in charge of the main ship and the fleets that followed, with theirs leading the way towards Balbadd.

Leaning over the rails like her siblings, Kohaku watched as the horizon kept being broken by the tiny roofs of the city that would only come closer; the northern skies beyond somewhat darker. She'd never been this far out west. The east had been her home for many years. The Eastern Isles...like a forsaken fortress she once, long ago, dared to tread. To a little kid the country seems like a vast world of adventures. Hers definitely was. But she soon learned the vastness that the world held. Suddenly it wasn't just 'her country' or 'her people' or 'her family.' Out of the blue, it became 'the world' and 'all peoples' and 'all families.' They were so far apart and yet she wondered if at their core all peoples were alike.

It interested her yet greatly saddened her. Once long ago she'd promised her dearest friend that they would travel the world once the war was done. Now she traveled alone and the war was far from over.

Out of nowhere, the breeze blew and she smelled the salt of the sea, felt the freshness of the water. But all sounds dulled at the fast fluttering that came past her ears. It swept by her so fast that she thought she'd imagined it. Even turning behind her to see if a bird or something had passed, she was astounded to see nothing but clear skies behind them.

 _What in the heavens...?_

"Miss Kohaku!"

The agitated and alarmed tone of Seijin's shriek made her turn abruptly towards the cabin that led below deck. Seijin ran through and past the soldiers that gawked at him but the boy didn't seem to care. In a matter of seconds, he stood before them utterly out of breath.

" _What's the matter, Jin?"_ she signed once the boy had recovered some air into his lungs.

He lifted his head, eyes wide, and stared directly at Kohaku. "Urgent message—the General Commander!"

 _En?_

Running out without a word, Kohaku rushed below deck with them dashing behind her. Heading straight into the cabin where the magicians on board were stationed, she gawked at the grand piece they had at hand. Not quite knowing what it entailed, she knew that they used it communicate between factions of their military.

One of the magicians spun around at seeing them arrive and spoke directly to Kohaku. She was startled by the message they were receiving. "It's the General Commander, General Reizei."

" _What is it?"_

"It's..." the girl hesitated but when urged by Seijin, she rearranged the magoi in the Eye of the Rukh embedded in their equipment to repeat the message that had been sent.

" **Koumei! Hakuryuu, Kohaku, Hakuei, Kougyoku!"** The room shook at the yell and Kohaku had to cover her ears from the intense volume that the Eye of the Rukh was emitting. **"Come forth, immediately!"**

 _Forth? Forth to where?_

"Where did the message come from?" Sousei inquired in a hurry.

"A few kilometers of the north of Magnostadt, my lord." She turned to Kohaku with an urgent expression, "What shall we respond, General?"

Magnostadt? And he called all the Metal Vessel users with no explanation?

 _Something's going on._

" _I'm en route."_

The magician nodded and transferred the message. Kohaku didn't wait to see it through. Instead she stormed out of the place and into her cabin. She hadn't noticed but the twins and Seijin were all behind her and this time were all talking at once.

Hurriedly, she took her journal and shoved it into Seijin's hands. The boy understood without a word. The twins had no time to get any questions answered, no matter how fast they asked them. Kohaku knew as much as they did. They all went above deck where the magicians were already preparing to cast a Magic Transfer Circle near the area.

Double checking, she made sure Marbas was secure on her wrist and that Beleth was ready to djinn equip the second she passed through that magic circle. The magicians cast it in the middle of the deck, and it opened with a scenario of a night sky. She knew how they worked; it still unnerved her that she had to trust them to cast it right.

Turning to the twins, Kohaku faced each as she spoke, starting with Suisei. _"Be on your toes. Whatever's happening could come here."_ Promptly, she faced Sousei, _"You're in charge of the fleets. Get them to Balbadd and try contacting all generals when you arrive. If no response or request for assistance comes, remain there. Await for any notice and stay alert."_

The twins looked concerned but knew what was expected of them. Both saluted and bowed, acknowledging her orders. She smiled and spun about ready to head into the depths of that circle and to whatever awaited her in Magnostadt.

" _Wait!"_ Habit and pure instinct at hearing her voice stopped her as she took as step forward. _"Take it with you."_

Kohaku hesitated entering the circle at this. Sousei glanced back at Suisei as the two watched their sister's unmoving back. "Haku-nee?" But there was no answer from her. Her mind was too preoccupied with a very important decision.

To take it or not.

 _That choice itself is free will._

The call had been urgent. All of them. No explanation. Something was _not_ right.

" _Then take it...and ensure nothing else goes wrong."_

That was enough to convince her. Spinning on her heels, Kohaku walked straight to Seijin and reached out to the carnation hairpin that stuck out from between the pages. It was a swift movement and the hairpin slid right out. Without a word, she slid it through her hair bun, the piece sitting tightly in place. The three looked at her strangely but she only smiled, reassuringly.

" _I'll be off then."_

At seeing that they smiled meekly. Without another word, she stepped through with Beleth in hand.

 _Djinn of Vainglory and Champions, in the name of my magoi, envelop me to grant me greater power. This I command of you and your household…_

" _Be wise."_ Kohaku pursed her lips at hearing _her_ voice. It sounded like her but she knew better. From where her rukh was trapped, she could never reach out.

 _Not unless I use it. Not unless I set her free...willingly._

But like always she was the voice of reason, the one Kohaku least wanted to hear. _"If you see the need to, use it."_

"I won't."

The staff came to her hands as she felt herself beginning to be engulfed by Beleth's essence,"Come forth, dwell within my body: Beleth."

* * *

 _The place was morbid. Cliffs upon cliffs inside deep, interconnected caverns. Moss littered the walls and glowed a bright blue. It was the brightest light there was in the place. The narrow paths that led to different rooms were bordered to the sides by what looked like water. It shimmered white but looked like fog swimming by. The bottom wasn't visible at all._

 _There were strange creatures unlike any of the ones she'd ever encountered. They were mostly black and foggy like the water and had strange marking on their bodies that ranged in colors. None were as bright blue as the moss, though. It was like looking at the sun through broken colored-glass. It was a borealis of life._

 _Everywhere she looked, she saw amazing things. Things she had never seen in her short eleven years of life. Nothing in the world existed like this._

 _She stumbled, her feet aching from so much walking, but she was too astounded by her surroundings to care. Picking up the oversized sword she carried, cracked as it was, she went on through the empty caverns._

 _Everything was so—_

" _Ah!"_

 _Tripping on her own feet as she backed off, the girl fell down with the steel clattering beside her. Funny enough, the beings that had frightened her didn't seem bothered by the loud noise. Backing up against the wall, she gazed at the...things...that stood past her._

 _Languid, gray, transparent. Like the water, they seemed made of fog. She kept a close eye on them as she stood and they continued on their way. They acted like they didn't see her; and by the looks of it, they probably couldn't. Their eyes were white, turned over. Despite their vague appearance, it was clear for her that they were all wearing different types of clothes. She recognized some as indigenous from what she'd seen the islanders wearing. Other's resembled that of soldiers in uniform. They were all different and yet similar. Some walked aimlessly, others simply stood in place staring at nothing._

 _She didn't try aggravating them. Instead, she walked around them and continued forth. It wasn't until she heard growling that she stopped in her tracks. Scanning the area with her sight, she saw where the guttural growling came from. It wasn't until they emerged that she saw the large, black hound that came out. It oozed it's skin, again like fog, but its paws left imprints behind; whatever shiny moss it touched under its feet simply flickered out and shriveled. On its head, instead of eyes or a snout, it had a long bony mask with dark eye-sockets. Strange markings were on its face of the same bright blue color as the moss. It scanned the room aimlessly. At first, she thought it harmless but she couldn't have been more wrong. As soon as it sniffed the air and spotted her, the markings changed to a bright red color._

 _As if provoked, the beings that had been peaceful up till then changed. Their eyes became the same bright red and they began to move...towards her._

 _In a panic, she tried running away but the hound quickly intercepted her and blocked her only exit. This thing wasn't like the others. It wasn't friendly. The beast let its jaw open and she saw it unhinge, opening to ungodly proportions. That was definitely not normal. It snarled at her, baring incredibly serrated teeth._

 _When it launched at her, she scrambled out of its way. It skidded at missing but quickly started again for her. Lifting herself up and dragging the sword along, she rushed away from it but staggered when she ran into something. Looking up, she didn't have time to react as one of the specters grabbed her arm and started yanking at her._

 _It felt cold. Dead._

 _No matter how much she pulled, the thing wouldn't budge. It held her steadfast. It wasn't until others started to reach for her the same way that her instincts and fear kicked it. Out of the blue, she started swinging the sword around the best she could with the unproportionate weight. At striking one, she noticed how it shrieked in pain before dispersing out like the fog it seemed to be—whatever remnants were left simply scattered and floated upward until they disappeared._

 _They could die._

 _Hacking at random and hoping to strike, she dealt with a couple more that threatened to hold her in place. It wasn't until she pierced through the one holding her arm that she could finally move. The blade clattered to the floor, her tired arm unable to hold it aloft any longer._

 _The growling returned along with snarls and made her spin on her heels. The moment she did she caught the sight of the hound leaping into the air and going for the deadly bite. Instinctively she raised her arm to defend herself and the hound took it fully into its mouth. Crying out in pain, she punched and slashed at it while feeling her flesh beginning to tear. It burned; it hurt._

" _Get off me!" she yelled and struck again with the sword. The blade flailed, missing, but the side of the hilt smashed against the skull mask it wore. Her ears caught the resounding crack of it before the hound yelped and jumped back. Holding her mauled arm and the sword in one hand, she watched the hound whimper as it incessantly rubbed at its mask with its front paws. Hers bright blue eyes saw small pieces falling; she'd broken the mask._

 _Not waiting around for it to attack her, she sprinted out towards the way it'd been blocking without looking back. The few minutes after her head start, she heard the barking and snarling of the hound and felt the pounding of its paws on the ground as it ran towards her._

 _The worst fear her mind ran through was that there would be a dead end to the cavern and that she would end up being food for the thing. Thankfully, as the moss illuminated the cavern further in, she spotted a door._

 _A smile parted her lips. Safety. But as she ran onto the door and scrambled her hand around for the handle, dread filled her. There was no handle._

 _Before she could even think about what to do next she heard a snarl too close behind her for comfort. Skidding to the side, she barely avoided the hound as it clashed against the door. It shook its head and spun about to have her at full view. With that, she could see the damage she had done. A quarter of the mask had broken off the top left side and it exposed the creatures face. It's eye was a small white slit and it seem to have bled from shards of the mask digging into its face. The blood oozed bright blue despite the rest of its markings remaining red like before._

 _It snarled and without warning it launched at her. Instinct again took over but this time, it made her thrust her sword straight ahead. Unable to stop its attack, the hound took a mouthful of steel. The hound still bashed against her body and clamored on top of her. She remained still for a whole breathe and could feel her lungs shrink as she held it for another. When nothing moved, she pushed the hound off and to the side with her one usable arm._

 _The creature fell limply, it's jaw unhinged. The mask lost all color before it cracked and completely broke off from its face. Blue blood rushed from inside it, the sword too deep in its throat for her to pull out. Feeling a rush of cold, she looked over her shoulder to see some of the ghouls from before. They'd made their way up to the last chamber but they weren't coming to her anymore. They seemed to have stopped mid stride. A suddenly brush of warmth came over the place and she watched, shocked and amazed, as their white eyes turned over and lit up with a gentle spark of life. Color return to them—all different from one another—and they glanced around as if confused. But the confusion was short-lived as realization hit them. Their expression changed into a myriad of emotions until they all landed on her and the dead hound beside her._

 _Instead of feeling threatened by their scrutiny, she felt calm. Their eyes were much more human—much more alive. Warm smiles came to the ghouls before they spoke._

" _Thank you."_

 _The first to say this, flourished from its feet upward and vanished into a sea of gold that flew away. More spoke their gratitude before disappearing just the same, leaving her alone._

 _Her arm hurt and burned like the fires of hell but she had no way to care for it. Her eyes landed on the hound still beside her and spotted the blue tears that had come out of its white slit eyes. For a moment she felt sorry for it; she hadn't known what it was doing or why._

 _Since she was little she'd been taught that nature never attacked unprovoked. It fought to protect, to feed, to defend itself or its territory. Something that reminded her a lot of humans. Wanting to leave it resting peacefully, she did her best to pull her sword out. It got messy but after a few futile attempts, she fell back using her whole weight to pull the blade out for the hound. The steel broke halfway as it clashed against the creatures serrated teeth but at least now she could close its mouth and eyes._

 _A sudden sound caught her by surprise and she turned to see the door without a handle beginning to open. Air rushed from inside and brushed her caramel tresses away. Stark blue eyes wide, she stood languidly and headed for the room, leaving the broken sword behind._

 _The room itself was larger, a much larger cavern than the rest. The ceiling and walls had the same moss lighting it. The circular cavern stood with many artifacts strewn about, stone shaped like coins or jewels. Towards the middle of the room, climbing up a small set of steps, she spotted a lone pedestal. It wasn't until she approached it that she spotted an object on it._

 _She eyed the thing. Unlike all the others, this one was actually made of metal: a lone golden chalice. She picked it up and looked inside of it. Empty. A sigh escaped her. She could've really gone for a drink of water._

" _Sad to say, I don't believe I can procure that for you."_

 _Before she could freak out about the voice that had boomed through the room, she felt the chalice in her hands warm up an instant before something emerged. Letting go of the chalice and taking the steps down and away from the pedestal, she watched as a being came through._

 _A man. At least what looked to be an overly large man. It's skin was of a light blue. It's hair was long and ran down his back, swept back—at least what she assumed to be hair. White, flimsy, and fading down into bright blue at its tips, it looked more like burning fire than hair. His chest was mostly bare with the same markings she had seen on the other creatures, except these glowed an eerie white. Around his hips, as he sat, she saw the white and black silks that wrapped around him. What looked to be two ram skulls hinged at either side of his hips._

 _Atop his head laid another, much larger skull. It certainly didn't look human or animal. It laid skewed across the top of his head, the skull's right socket overlayed perfectly over his left eye. Through it, she could see the eerie gleam of bright blue but no eye. Not just eerie, ominous. His other eye glinted gray as he took a swig of his pipe. The pipe looked like a weapon to her, a scythe linked to chains. Following the chains, she saw it curl around his neck like a necklace and fall down to his side as it wrapped again around his hips and the ram skulls. It ended beside him with a black iron lantern._

 _The lantern had no light in it. And she swore from just looking at it that she could easily fit inside._

 _The man took a swig of his scythe before blowing out the smoke. She coughed at the enriched smell that hit her much too concentrated. As she rubbed the irritation away from her eyes, she watched the smoke linger as it swirled around them, creating a moat. It looked just like the water from outside._

" _Who's come to awaken me?" he called, his voice booming through the cave._

 _Petrified but daring at the same time, she lifted her one arm over her head and waved it, "Me."_

 _He stared down and blinked a couple of times. "A human child?" Swiftly, he started looking around. "You came alone?"_

 _The disbelief that laced his voice peeved her. "Yes, I did. I've heard about you dungeons and the power of kings."_

 _Taking another breath of his pipe, he bent down to reach her level. "And who are you, child?"_

 _The girl closed her eyes and refrained from breathing as the smoke brushed past her. "My name's Ceara. I came looking for you."_

 _A rambunctious laughter escaped him as he looked down at her. "What could a child possibly want with me?"_

" _You're a djinn, no?" she inquired. "You're powers can do amazing things, right?"_

" _So?"_

" _I want you to bring my brother back to life."_

 _A sombre expression came over his features. "I cannot do that."_

 _Anger burst out of her eyes as they widened. "But I got to you! I've heard so many came but I'm the only one here, aren't I?"_

" _And I commemorate your resilience to brave through my Dungeon but alas my powers aren't as powerful as you imagine them."_

 _Ceara's anger didn't disappear; instead she opted for the second best choice. "Then, if you're still powerful, I'll just kill those bastards that took Cael and Papa away from me."_

 _The djinn took another swig from his pipe, seemingly in a perpetual pensive state. "As if I would contract with a human with such impure motives."_

 _Ceara's eyes widened then. Instead of anger or annoyance, he saw nothing but pain. Defeated as she was, she fell back to a sit; her arm limp beside her as tears came from her eyes._

 _In a way, he was impressed that such a young child was able to traverse along his Dungeon without help. Even more so, that her rukh was so downtrodden at such a young age, and by the looks of it, tainting further. Curiosity obliged him to ask, "Why do you wish to take revenge against those who have taken your brother and father when the act itself won't bring them back?"_

 _She wiped at her face fervently before replying. "I can't stay put anymore. I'm tired of everyone I love dying and those responsible still living."_

" _Regrettably, I cannot condone your motives." Ceara looked up at him with eyes wide—fear, sadness, and anger lingered in them, but what he caught most was loneliness. "I can see what pains you, child. Loneliness has eaten the brightness of your being and loss has only dampened the flame. But as much as life has hit you, it continues to burn. It's faint and tainted but it burns fervently, that tiny flame."_

 _Reaching down with his pipe, he placed it near her and nudged at her arm. Taking the edge of the scythe in her hand carefully, he lifted her up to her feet as he continued._

" _Child, you may have lost them but I can assure you, their love for you remains and is what keeps your small flame alive and away from depravity."_

" _Their love?" she repeated._

 _He nodded as answer. "You may not see or feel them but it remains with you even after they're gone. Death, much like life, is a cycle onto itself; it is one no one escapes from. But it is not something to be sad about." He motioned out towards the entrance of the room, "Those specters outside, do you recall what they said to you?"_

 _Ceara stared briefly over her shoulder, her brow furrowed, before she turned back. "They thanked me."_

" _You know why they thanked you?" She shook her head, eyes a bit wide and still glazed over. "My creatures are harbingers and collectors of souls. Those who've died in my dungeon are collected, and the hounds, like the one you dealt with, take over. Under their control, the souls don't think; they lose any semblance of the rukh that made them themselves. That rukh is trapped here—in my lantern."_

 _With one hand, he brought the metal lantern over and placed it before her. Laying her hand on it, she felt nothing. No cold, no heat. It just felt empty._

" _Those specters outside don't think. The souls in my lantern are aware of what's happening to their spectral bodies but they cannot act. As specters, they manifest my thoughts if I so wished it but it isn't them. They remain trapped here, unable to return to the cycle of rebirth. Not until they are released. But when you killed my hound, you released the hold it had on the collected souls and the rukh left the lantern to guide them back to the Great Flow."_

 _Ceara gasped as realization hit her: she freed them._

 _The djinn smiled at seeing this on her face. "You allowed their return to the world. There are things beyond death, child. Although it is beyond your world of understanding, we return to the world anew in this never-ending cycle."_

" _Those you love may be gone but that love which they left you with will always be a part of you. Don't taint the pureness of their love with your ill will. Instead move along—follow the flow as they have. And one day, if fate so has it, you will meet again."_

 _Newly formed tears streamed down her cheeks. This time Ceara didn't wipe at them and instead let them flow. "...you really think so?"_

" _I know so."_

" _...that's sounds nice." A weak smile came to her lips as she looked up at him, "Thank you."_

 _Before his own eyes, he watched as the tainted rukh turned completely white as it embraced her. By no means was she anything special, but that didn't mean she couldn't live to be special._

 _A ruthless king was one of many. Those who ruled with iron fists, those who oppressed, those who distrusted. There is no unity in power, only in compassion. Sacrificing for the good of those one rules over, being able to see them as people, that is what makes a king worthy of their power._

 _They rule to give. They rule to prosper. They rule, not for themselves, but for others._

 _And if this child grew knowing that, then she would grow to be a wonderful king._

" _Ceara." She looked up as she finally cleaned her face with the skirt of her dirtied dress. "I have decided to form a contract with you, but only if you vow never to use me to take the life of another in revenge. Learn that revenge does nothing for you except taint that love you hold so dear. Raise me, instead, to protect those you still have. Can you promise me that?"_

 _Ceara's eyes brightened as a warm smile came to her lips. "I can."_

 _He knew better than to take a human's word but something beckoned him to the child. He motioned out towards the room. Before her eyes the stone from before changed to glittering gold and jewels. What amazed her the most was the magic circle he created. From it a pillar of light emerged and rose past the cavern._

" _It will lead you to the outside world."_

" _What about you?" she asked sheepishly._

" _I'll remain with you," he said and lightly touched the carnation hairpin that, despite the hectic fighting she'd done, was still on her hair. "Here."_

 _Her hands came up to take the metal hairpin out of her hair, her tresses coming undone. The carnation gleamed under the light of the portal. "My hairpin?"_

" _I can sense it," he began. "It's special, is it not?"_

 _Ceara brushed her thumb over the flower and smiled. "Cael gave it to me. It's part of a pair. He...had the other." Her eyes lifted to meet his, "It's all I have left of him."_

" _Then it shall be a suitable vessel. I look forward to serving you, my little king. And I shall serve you well as Djinn of Innocence and Martyrdom. My name is..."  
_

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _It's not going to be more than 10,000, I said. It's not gonna be less than 30 pages, I said. *sigh* That just shows how much I listen to myself. Especially during finals. I just wanted to write it so bad! I'm glad I finished it though. It gives me the weekend to focus on studying._

 _Anyway, that rant's over. A lot of things happened this chapter. Like...a lot. Not much I've actually got to say about this chapter. Well, nothing except I've placed large pieces into place. If you don't figure it out, well, all of you will get an answer on the next chapter. I don't know when that's gonna come around though cx Last minute edit too: I legit cut out the original ending for this chapter. The last memory was supposed to be longer but I felt this was a better way to end it. You won't get to know what djinn it was until next chapter -w-_

 _Oh, and I've wanted to give such kudos to a lovely person that drew Kohaku! They did a wonderful and lovely job. Like I'm in love. That's exactly how I imagined her. So, if you want a glimpse at the heroine of this story go right here → ( ineeduhnap .tumblr post /157 43298 8867 /sketch -of- xeveningx -s- oc- kohaku -that -story -is) I don't know what FF will do with the link so I just put it here. Take out the spaces and it should work, if not just let me know c:_

 _Now I'll go ahead and thank the wonderful people that Favorited and Followed:_

 _ **\- Taffdog19943  
\- cresent rain  
**_ _ **\- SeaGoddessOfStarlight  
**_ _ **\- kanna-yamamoto  
**_ _ **\- Xelia Lagan  
**_ _ **\- Volpiko**_

 _Thanks again to all the lovely people that reviewed too. I hope that I didn't forget to reply to any of those c: Now, for the time being, it's time for me to go back to studying. Well, friends, hoped you enjoyed this chapter and stayed tuned for the next chapter!_


	8. How to Say Goodbye

_**Chapter Eight:**_

 _How to Say Goodbye_

* * *

 _What in heaven's name…_

Eyes wide, Kohaku could not believe the destruction scattered all around her. The lands, once fruitful and plentiful, had been ravaged completely. What's worse was that, from where she was, the city of Magnostadt stood in shambles—a hollow remnant of what it once was. But her second of awe was cut short when a booming voice ordered them to move along to destroy the Black Djinn that attacked the city. Kohaku hadn't taken notice if the others had arrived but by how they all shot out towards the city after the order was given, there didn't seem to be enough time to double check.

Not wanting to be left behind, Kohaku sprung forward to Magnostadt. The instant they all landed, the focus came to the Djinns that assailed the citizens still trapped in the city. Her sound staff twirling about her, Kohaku slashed at the ones that stood in her way before meeting with the rest of the Kou Metal Vessel users.

 _They're all here._

A small sigh of relief escaped her. Certainly having the six of them here would put a stop on whatever the hell was causing so much destruction and death. Her eyes landed on each person she'd come to know over the past half a year and couldn't help but gawk at them; some of their djinn equips, like Kouha's and Kougyoku's, she'd gotten a small peek of during training. Kouen's as well, but none of them ever in their full equips.

The sound of a slight high-pitched voice, one unfamiliar to her, caught Kohaku's attention. She turned her head downward to see a young boy flying over to them. As he closed the distance between them calling out Hakuei's name, Kohaku's ears caught the distinct sound of fluttering. Touching her ears, she focused better on him as the blue-haired boy came to stay beside Hakuei. It took her but a few seconds to recognize the noise.

Rukh. But this wasn't the normal flow she heard in nature. No, this was unparalleled to being around any person or magician. By the sound of it, the rukh seemed to linger close to the boy, the sound of fluttering wings becoming exceptionally loud around their whole group. She'd never encountered such thing before.

 _No. I have._

Judar. This unparalleled amalgamation of rukh—there was no mistaking it. Only a magi was capable of such feat.

The pervasive train of thought she carried was cut short when another voice, this time of an older blonde boy, came to her ears as the young man that had accompanied the supposed magi flew over to Kougyoku's side.

Incredulous and exasperated at her friendliness towards him, Kouha quickly voiced what she had very much in mind. "A-Alibaba-chan!? You're talkin' to an enemy general, y'know! Why're you being so overly familiar?"

" _I hate to be judgmental but Kouha's right, Kougyoku,"_ Kohaku signed to her. She doesn't miss the puzzled looks on both boys but doesn't bother with them. _"What is this about?"_

"Oh no, Kouha, anegimi, it isn't anything bad," Kougyoku replied as she came to stand by the blonde's side with said boy seeming very much unnerved by their scrutiny. "The truth is that we're very good friends."

The blonde—Alibaba she had to remember—pointed upward. "In any case, our enemy is that absurdly big, black sphere and that thing above it."

Following his hand, Kohaku spun about to find a horrid sight that she failed to see amidst the commotion. Like he said, a huge black, sphere stood over the city and above that, parting the sky, was _something_ reaching down with what looked to be tiny, black hands.

" _Impossible…"_

Beleth's ghastly whisper caught her off guard and made Kohaku turn her head to listen to him. _You recognize that thing?_

" _It's the Medium—one of them at least. And that above in the sky is a Dark Spot. It is from where Ill Ilah can descend."_

 _God...of Illness?_ Kohaku had trouble wrapping her mind around the small information that Beleth dropped on her. Marbas quickly stepped up to give her two cents in worth.

" _You can't let the Medium bring it down to your world! If it does, all it touches, everything and everyone, will die!"_

That definitely matched the urgency she'd heard in Kouen's message. Hearing his voice, Kohaku heard him speak about obtaining the truth. About what, she could only guess. Although knowing him, it would be something pertaining to that history of 'the other world' he so often spoke of. But that paled in comparison to her wanting to safeguard the innocent that were suffering, unable to protect themselves.

 _I will do what is in my power to stop this. Please, lend me your aid._

She felt their warmth emanating from her sound staff and her bracelet, a clear reminder of where they stood in their loyalties. _"For you, always, our king."_

In agreement, a small hum reached her ears. A frown came to Kohaku's face but she decided to disregard _her_ wouldn't use it.

 _I won't lose you._

Determined, Kohaku held her sound staff tightly as the rest headed out to destroy the Black Djinn that rapidly and continuously surfaced from the Medium. Not wasting a second, she followed and began doing the same.

The fighting began in bouts, each destroying as many of the Black Djinn as they could. After a handful of attempts slashing through them with sound blades, Kohaku noted that it took too much effort and wasted magoi needlessly. The more she attacked them, the more obvious it became that this would be a lengthy process. She couldn't continue going about it by mindlessly slashing away.

The slight flicker of black made her spin about in time to catch a Black Djinn in mid-attack. Raising a wall of sound right between them, she countered its attack but suffered the rebound as it pushed her back.

 _This isn't working._ There were too many and despite her attacks being able to affect huge areas, these enemies were too resilient for her sound blades to destroy them in one hit. The vibrations weren't concentrated enough as blades to pierce through their hard exterior.

" _Perhaps vibrations from the inside will work,"_ Beleth suggested.

Yes, she'd thought of that. But planting mines wasn't something easy to do with so much havoc going on. _I need them stationary._

An odd sound made her turn about. Her eyes wide, she couldn't help but stare astounded at Koumei's and Dantalion's powers: transfer circles. Making different circles so that the djinn attacked themselves, Kohaku noticed the odd knack of it. Pausing, she realized that as long as their limbs came through the circles, the djinn were immobile.

 _Perfect._

Flying over the hoard that Koumei held in his tranfer circles, she raised her hand to sign his way. _"Keep them locked, Koumei!"_ The prince didn't question, just nodded once. Kohaku swung her sound stuff across before leveling it horizontally before her.

A pitch that none except those with well-developed hearing like her would hear echoed through the air. Using those high frequency vibrations, she concentrated on these before forcing them to shrink down. The small space caused the vibrations to solidify into small spheres no larger than her palm; the spheres were translucent and the only thing pinpointing their location was the rapid movement of the particles in them.

Once formed, several hovered all around her and stood in place, colliding ever faster against each other in such tight space. When the pitch became too high for even her ears to hear, Kohaku swung her staff outwards. The sphere of sound she created swiftly expanded out, hitting all the smaller spheres she'd created. The impact propelled them all in a strictly linear direction, each finding a target in one of the djinn trapped in the different transfer circles. It pleased her that these were powerful enough to pierced through them regardless of where they hit.

The djinn tried prying at the entry points uselessly. Kohaku could only grin at their naivete; they couldn't well touch something that struck with such force that it penetrated deeper than they could reach. Holding her staff out towards them, she snapped her wrist once, then two more times to let the rings echoes.

 _Dajij' Tanafur._

An instant after the trigger, the djinn began shaking before exploding and leaving behind nothing but bits and pieces from the sound spheres in them rapidly expanding. The happiness from a successful clear, though, was short-lived as more Black Djinn came from the Medium. Even with _Dajij' Tanafur_ , she could only take out so many at a time.

There had to be another way. It was Hakuei's quick reasoning that got them thinking about actually going for the Medium. Seeing as the path was blocked by many more djinn, there had to be a better way to let Alibaba through so he could attack.

"Kohaku-san!" Hearing Hakuei call her, she turned about to face the princess. "Let's create a path for him, together!" Nodding, both—Paimon using the wind and Beleth the sound—cleared a path for Alibaba to course through. But even at attacking the thing full on with his djinn proved useless as it protected itself.

Kohaku recognized that shield, a borg. Much like Judar's. _That thing is using magic?_

" _It is how it's creating the Black Djinn, my king,"_ Beleth informed her. _"The Medium is nothing more than an amalgamation of black rukh."_

What the young magi, Aladdin, said after to Kouha only corroborated Beleth's words—the Medium had a tremendous amount of magoi reserve and used it to create the djinns and its borg. The one tad bit of information she hadn't expected was how many they would have to destroy before even weakening the thing.

 _Ten thousand…?_

That was ludicrous. Although somewhat tired, her reserve would manage somehow but, as Kohaku oversaw the others, she knew that they wouldn't last as long. Even with everyone else so downtrodden by the news, Kouen didn't seem the least bit bothered. It truly amazed her how determined he was—ten thousand was going to be a tough deal to break but Kohaku believed he could deal a big dent in that number. His Astaroth was a great fire-djinn and much more effective than Beleth with large amounts of damage as she'd seen herself before.

Worry and panic struck her hard—her heart slightly missing a beat—when Kouen got swallowed by the hoard of Black Djinn. Hakuei's shout didn't help her.

" _Listen."_ _Her_ voice calmly spoke and drew Kohaku's attention away from her panic. Opening her ears and calming her own startled beating heart, she heard another distinct rapid beating. One she recognized.

 _He's strong. I shouldn't worry._

" _As are you, my king,"_ Beleth added. _"Be vigilant. Around the prince!"_

Her ears caught both Beleth's warning and the approaching djinn as they encroached Kouen while he was still inside the mass of Black Djinns. They were approaching him fast and Kohaku reacted on instinct.

Bending her knees,the circlets of green light wrapped around her ankles, hands, and staff as she conjured _Dajij 'Aghlal_. She dashed forward, leaving nothing but high-pitched vibrations and the rest to cover their ears in her wake. Kohaku sprung for the Black Djinn that came closer to the horrid amalgamation. Using her own propulsion as force, she pierced through the line of djinn and kept going despite the rebound that hit her every time one exploded after an attack. It was a blink of an eye later that she stopped, out of breath from the entourage of rebounds, just before the large mass exploded in a burst of white flames. The wall of sound sphere from _Dajij 'Aghlal_ still protecting her, Kohaku was able to avoid the after effects of the explosion.

So close to him, Kohaku could see Kouen as he dispelled Astaroth's equip and called upon Agares. The tiny beast he became baffled her because of its similarities to Marbas. What amazed her more, though, was the tremendous strength magic he used to dig out a pillar from the earth's crust. Kohaku's eyes followed Hakuei as she began clearing a way while he dug the pillar out. The Black Djinn were lined up perfectly in a circle around them and she felt heat coming from Marbas' bracelet.

" _Let's hunt!"_

A grin came to her lips at hearing her djinn's enthusiasm at seeing the Black Djinns sitting like ducks in a row. _If he's going all out, then so will I._ With that in mind, she undid Beleth's equip and called Marbas forth. Her shape shrunk to the beast child before landing at the top of the pillar that Kouen was still pulling out from underneath them.

"Destroy them," he called out loud. A satisfied smirk showed as she reeled back to spring toward the djinn. Dashing past Hakuei, Kohaku cladded her claws and talons in strength magic before pouncing and ripping a djinn apart in a matter of seconds before hopping off to the next. Despite the ruckus all around, she could catch the voices of those staying back as the three of them worked together.

"A second djinn?" Alibaba called completely amazed.

"It's anegimi's Marbas!" Kougyoku fawned with a proud smile, explaining to him. "She's not as fast as she is with Beleth but her strength rivals even Kouen onii-sama's Agares'."

Aladdin stared dumbfounded at the two, "Uncle and that big sister both have multiple djinns."

"For Kou to have them…" Alibaba didn't finish that thought. There wasn't much need to do so, though. Even Kohaku could know what he meant to say simply by the tone of his voice. Multiple Metal Vessel users were terrifying in their own right—Kouen and she were no different.

At feeling the lava flow that exploded outward as the pillar of earth was finally brought out, she flinched at the intense heat that radiated from it. Jumping back after reaping a djinn, Kohaku stood back to watch with the rest as Kouen re-equipped Astaroth and began taking the magoi from the lava flow. The versatility and quick thinking didn't surprise her; what did was what Alibaba spoke aloud.

"Could it be that he really wants to...destroy ten thousand Black Djinns?"

 _Impossible._ They were too many, even for him. Even if he kept restoring his magoi with the lava flow, it was torture. She'd done that with Beleth seeing as the cacophony of battle often helped restore magoi to her vessel. She had done that only once or twice at most. This?—the pain itself would be excruciating.

From what Aladdin said, he too knew the risks of doing this. Kouen was practically at the verge of dying every time he did it.

"He won't listen to you." Kohaku turned to Koumei, puzzled at his comment. "He doesn't mind hurting himself. My brother and king is that kind of person after all…"

 _Yes, but still._ Kohaku couldn't help worry as they all watched Kouen fighting. This was beyond reckless and she'd done her share of foolish things. But at thinking this, it made her wonder what pushed him to fight so hard. Hearing Alibaba's philosophical spiel didn't stick well with her gut feeling. It just didn't sound like something Kouen would do.

"No, I didn't mean that." Kohaku chuckled at Alibaba's reaction and Koumei's conflicted expression. If her hunch was right then it would most likely be about some unknown knowledge.

 _And knowing him when he's like that, it very well might be about..._

"You know, when my brother and king has that excited face…" Koumei drawled as all their eyes fell upon their General Commander.

Despite being off fighting at quite a distance, Kohaku could hear every word spat out in anger and frustration from Kouen. From her time knowing him, however, it didn't really amaze her to hear such vulgar and annoyed tone. Excited; Koumei's words barely scratched the surface of Kouen's state of mind at the moment.

" _He wishes to speak with the proxy of our past king?"_ Beleth's puzzled tone showed her how much others were confused by this.

 _Surely, knowing him, it's something about that 'other world' he speaks about._ And surely when Kouha explained it to Alibaba and Aladdin, he turned to Kohaku when she asked about that 'conversation with Aladdin' he mentioned.

"Aladdin told Brother En that he would tell him about another world called 'Alma Toran,'" Kouha explained with a bit of nonchalance. When Kohaku nodded with a scoff, he raised an eyebrow.

She shook her head while slightly chuckling. _"It just sounds like him is all."_ He grinned at reading that. No doubt they all knew this for a fact. Telling Kouha to translate, she waved a hand to get Alibaba's attention. _"Your assumption wasn't wrong, just naive in the why. Kouen's a passionate man and can be somewhat obsessive with what he's passionate about."_

"Understatement," Koumei mumbled. The comment only made her smile wider.

A loud, vulgar exclamation from Kouen caught their attention and they all were caught off guard when he shouted at Alibaba. Before she or anybody could ask, he flew over and snatched Alibaba from their group. Kohaku watched them from afar as she listened to Hakuei's very detailed explanation of Kouen's three words.

Kohaku tended to agree but the eloquent way she put it might have been a bit sugar-coated. But the thought vanished when, from the small volcano that had been made from rupturing the lava vein, two small figures conjured their their Extreme Magic.

" _Two at the same time?"_ Marbas called out amazed.

Despite feeling that same bafflement, Kohaku's mind was made up seeing them casting such magic. _Doesn't matter. We need to protect them._ She was glad that she hadn't been the only one with that thought. At hearing Koumei's orders, she changed back to Beleth's djinn-equip and took a deep breath at the sudden fatigue that hit her.

" _Careful, my king,"_ Beleth warned. _"You may be powerful but your reserve is starting to reach low levels."_

It didn't matter. She'd gone through worse with less.

 _How many more times can I switch between you two?_

" _Once. And that would be pushing it."_

Good to know and have that tucked at the back of her mind. Using her sound blades and with Hakuei's help, they lasted enough for the two to cast their Extreme Magics. Kouen's _Astor Inqerad_ struck first, the white dragon of flames purging the Black Djinns that came out of the Medium as they surrounded it. Although she'd never seen it, Kohaku knew of the infinite white flames that Astaroth could create: eternal and destructive. Alibaba struck once the area was cleared of the Black Djinns and she had to force herself to watch closely despite the heat emanating from the two attacks. The fire giant he summoned struck the Medium straight on, it's borg catching the attack and the thing smirking at the failed attempt.

 _Extreme Magic can't touch it?_ It surely seemed like it when he couldn't break through it. But to her surprise, the Medium began to crack after Kouen added his white flames to the giant's sword. The enforced attack finally managed to crack it further and formed a massive explosion. The extreme heat coming from the aftermath was intense and it began scorching her skin a bit.

The feeling sending her into a bit of a panic at what the others could suffer from the residuum, she called for Beleth. Raising her sound staff, she raised a sphere about the group that absorbed the heat wave coming their way.

Aladdin turned to her with a small smile as he lowered his arm after the heat wave ceased and her shield fell. "Thank you, miss..."

 _Kohaku._

His smile grew at hearing her voice even when it had only been through Beleth's power. She guessed a magi like him would surely hear it and, thankfully, she hadn't been wrong. All of their eyes came to the Medium as the smoke dissipated and they saw the pillar connecting the Medium to Ill Ilah broken from the attack.

Kohaku eyed the Medium as Astaroth's flames continued to envelope it, destroying the Black Djinn as soon as they were born. As Kouen explained this to Aladdin, Kohaku couldn't help but frown and direct a question at him. _"The flames may last but what about your magoi?"_

"That's what the lava flow is for," he replied to her before turning with a scowl to Alibaba, raising his voice. "Hey, what are you doing? Let's go recover the magoi we expended by using the lava flow now that we have some time!" Alibaba followed with a slight pause while trying to catch his breath.

Kohaku smiled but the small advantage they had and the small hope attached to it vanished when a guttural sound came to her ears. She had less than a second to spin about and see the hands that sprouted out from the Medium, reaching towards the volcano. In a matter of seconds, the flow lost its fire and turned black. Her ears caught the frantic beating of wings that came back to the Medium; at turning back to that thing, she saw the Black Djinn returning to it as well.

 _I don't get it. What's it doing now?_

Her query doesn't go unanswered for long. The Medium rolls into itself before reforming and falling just outside of the city's borders as a doll-like giant. It landed sprawled hard over the floor with a hand on the ground.

Although Kouen mentioned Astaroth's flames disappearing, she couldn't see it. What she did see was how it robbed the ground it touched from the rukh. She could hear it and had to reach up to cover her ears from the shrill she heard coming from the rukh as that thing….took it.

Her eyes wide, Kohaku couldn't believe the ruin that it left in its wake. Trees and animals—all life that had been in range of it was dead.

It was at that heavy realization that a voice came to echo in her head. The voice itself belonged to someone she hadn't heard from in a long time. It wasn't Beleth or Marbas; it wasn't even mimicking _her voice_ anymore. This time it was him.

" _It courses with stolen lives."_

Aladdin confirmed both hers and _his_ assumption: if that thing got anywhere near the city it would take away all their magoi and kill them. The doll grabbed at its head before it grew and opened like a spider lily blooming. It's tendrils rose over the sky and caught a hold of pillar that remained from the suspended Dark Spot.

Without pause, it began pulling.

Alibaba rushed forth before anyone and Kohaku watched baffled as the thing blocked every single one of his attacks with the borg it created from its palm. Tendrils—from its head or ones that protruded from its whole body—chased after him, the larger hand impacting him and throwing him off.

Kouen assailed it from behind and left no chance for it to counterattack. Kohaku couldn't count the strikes from how fast he delivered them but one thing was clear: they were doing nothing. When the thing caught him in its grasp, Kohaku had to hold in a scream as the small white dragon hovering around gnawed off the Medium's hand, letting it and him fall to the ground. A gasp escaped her at seeing the aftermath of what a mere seconds of its touch had done to both.

Flesh, even their djinn-equip, had been stripped from them.

It was powerful. Virtually untouchable. And it could harm them with a mere touch.

 _This thing...how can we beat it?_

The crackling of energy made Kohaku look up to see Kougyoku. The furious princess' eyes widened before rage took over. "What the hell did you do…to my brother and friend, you monster!"

Swiftly and without another word, Kougyoku struck with her water spears. The attempt didn't work either, though, as it raised its palm to stop the attack. Before Kohaku could go and stop Kougyoku before she got hurt, she stopped dead in her tracks at what she saw. Kougyoku summoned a myriad of water spears more before hounding the Medium with them. Mercilessly. Relentlessly. Kohaku expected them to be blocked like before, and although some were, others went past and impaled the Medium.

"It worked!?" Aladdin's exclaim shared the same incredulous astonishment that Kohaku felt. How could it when neither Alibaba's nor Kouen's had? It wasn't until Kougyoku struck again with the same result that Kohaku noticed something.

 _It's hands...they're the only ones putting up a shield._

Aladdin came to the same conclusion and added that it could only steal rukh with its hands. The boy acted quick, too, and rushed towards the Medium to attack it with sand giants he summoned. The attempt was useless, though, as she saw the Medium simply steal the rukh from the sand.

Her ears perked at hearing Kouen's booming voice. He quickly told Aladdin to abstain from being rash before ordering Koumei to take over. Those orders given, Koumei raised his hands ready to teleport them. "Kouha, Kougyoku, General Kohaku, Princess Hakuei!"

Assessing the situation as the portal appeared behind her, she equipped Marbas again, quickly changing into her grown form. The exhaustion of changing three times hit hard and fast but she knew she had enough to conjure her Extreme Magic.

" _Watch it, though,"_ Marbas cautioned as she teleported herself. _"It'll drop critically low once you cast it."_

She'd deal.

Hakuei hit it first using _Pa'ir Al-hazard_ to shred it with the winds and send it upward towards the sky. Kouha followed suit and aimed _Lelazzo Madraga_ at an angle further up towards the sky and sea.

It was then that the circle transferring Kohaku appeared just above the Medium as it headed her way.

" _Answer my call, great beast of yore. Eradicate with nature's ferocity all that which threatens your holy lands! Sharisat Alttabiea!"_

At Kohaku's call, dark energy cladded her claws and talons, transforming them into something akin to black gemstone. The first two strikes with her claws hit it's sides and pulverized their target, taking chunks of its body from the sheer power of her black-gemmed claws. Somersaulting back into the air and striking it upwards a small distance with one talon, Kohaku used her last empowered kick to strike it downward with all her might.

The impact changed the Medium's trajectory down towards the sea where Kougyoku pierced through it with _Vainel Ganezza._ Aladdin gave the last hit with his fire magic that eroded all around the Medium in a burst of hellfire.

Despite being exhausted, she kept attacking along with the others as Koumei redirected their attacks every which way he could.

" _My king, you won't last much longer!"_

 _Just a little more._

As Alibaba and Kouen arrived and the rest got whatever attacks they could to Koumei's transfer circle, she sent a massive hit of strength magic with a single punch through it. All seven attacks were directed into a massive portal to directly hit the Medium's head, the result amounting to a huge explosion.

Kohaku watched the sea breathlessly and stared at the hole they'd made into the sea where the Medium had been shot through. The moment it rose, however, panic and dread both began to set into her.

 _It's gotten...bigger._..

"I-It's stealing the rukh from the sea...and becoming bigger!" Aladdin exclaimed.

"Can we...really win against it…!?" Kouha panted, eyes wide in disbelief. He was right. Kohaku knew that much from seeing them all exhausted beyond belief. They had expended their Extreme Magics and wouldn't hold on much longer.

Hearing a groan, Kohaku lifted her gaze to see Hakuei grimace while staring down at her staff, "My djinn equip is…!"

"We should be able to win…"

Kohaku couldn't disagree more with the little magi. As much as she wanted to believe that they could, the probabilities of that were close to null. Even with seven of them with djinn and a magi—not mentioning their lack of magoi—none of it mattered when the thing could just steal it back by killing its surroundings.

 _It's hopeless._

Her cynicism—like a sinister premonition—proved correct.

The Medium, as enlarged and strong with the amount of magoi it had, went for their weakest link first: Hakuei. Spinning about at hearing the movements, Kohaku didn't have enough strength or speed to reach Hakuei in time as the thing bashed her against the ground. A small relief came at seeing Aladdin protecting her but it didn't last long as another thing caught her attention.

Kougyoku's sudden exclaim made her turn towards the young princess as she summoned a huge water spear and pierced down at the Medium. The attack proved useless, though, as even without a borg, the spears did absolutely no damage. The air rush out from her lungs as she watched the hands from the head stretch out to catch Kougyoku's legs, her scream filling the air around Kohaku. Slow to react, she watched as Kouha freed her but at doing so put himself in harm's way. The hands reached out once more and engulfed him completely in its large palm.

The one to react was Kouen this time as he cut the hand that held his younger brother. "Kougyoku! Kouha!"

Kohaku followed his and Koumei's line of sight to the two siblings. Kougyoku's legs had been wounded but the one that turned her stomach was Kouha's whole body.

 _Dear gods…_

Her horror was cut short, though, when a rebound of energy burst out in waves. Turning about to see its source, Kohaku saw Koumei's demeanor chang completely. A single swipe upward of his finger is all it took for him to summon another transfer circle. This one hovered over one of the largest mountains around and teleported it right above the Medium. The whole piece dropped atop the creature with no hesitation.

But that thing...it simply emerged from the mountain, eating the rukh with its hands and breaking its way through the mountain. To her complete horror, the Medium let out a screech and crawled out of the makeshift tomb made by the mountain, unharmed.

Something that had slowly crept into her finally cemented itself at seeing the Medium leaning against the mountain, taking even more rukh for itself.

Helplessness.

Kohaku's confidence on her pool of magoi was good for someone holding multiple djinn. That confidence took a mighty nosedive, however, the moment it began to prove meaningless. No matter what they did, it proved useless. The more they attacked, the weaker they got and the more it simply became stronger by stealing the rukh of things it killed.

It was a vicious cycle that left them with exhaustion that kept them from fighting or with the Medium stripping them of their magoi. Both gave the same outcome: death. And even despite still being able to hold onto her form, she could feel it slipping. The cold concept cradled her mind and enveloped it in fear.

Death, not only hers but that of those she loved.

" _You have him."_ Eyes widening at hearing _her_ _voice_ again, Kohaku had to blink a few times to recognize it as fear blinded and deafened her. _"The Medium—like_ he _said it courses with stolen life. It's rukh of the dead; rukh that hasn't gone back to the flow. It's magoi you can take to replenish your own, just like Kouen and Alibaba did to replenish theirs from the lava flow. But you have to use him to have that chance."_

 _I can't._

The answer came with no hesitation. What she was asking of her was impossible. Her hands trembled at the mere idea, her fingers needing to tighten their hold around her staff.

 _I could lose you. This time forever._

" _You lost me years ago."_

Everything in her mind halted at that. Heavy perspiration ran down her face and neck, terror crawling under her skin. But she could hear her own breathing, still and leveled. Her heart beating in tandem with a calmness she couldn't see or feel but could hear. Her eyes lifted to linger at the monstrous shape of the Medium before glancing at Kouha, Kougyoku, and Hakuei.

All strong, all defeated. Yet alive.

" _Protect them, Speirr. Don't lose them too."_

"I won't..." she whispered.

 _I won't lose them._

She stayed behind as Kouen, Koumei, and Alibaba kept attacking in a frenzy. Desperation was clearly in their attacks. They were on the edge, barely able to fight. And yet they continued.

 _I will lose no one._

Quickly and determined, she fluttered down to the beach where Kouha, Kougyoku, and Hakuei laid feet away—one conscious, the other two barely responsive.

"Not today. Not ever again."

With her declaration, she undid Marbas' equip letting her body rest for a second. Reaching upward, she caressed the carnation hairpin for a second. "Will you help me...even after all this time, old friend?"

The eight-pointed star shone on the hairpin and she felt it's warmth—a cool yet assuring heat. The rumble of his chuckle echoed in her head before a reply came.

" _Always, little king."_

A smirk came unbeknownst to her at an old nickname she had, since years past, forgotten. And yet it remained as appropriate as ever. In a world of conquerors, she remained small. A lamb among predators.

" _But in the land they will only reach after death, you are their queen."_

"Yes."

Because if it drew breath, it was sure to meet them.

Holding out the carnation hairpin, she held it up to her lips. A chaste kiss was all she placed upon it before calling him forth.

"Spirit of Innocence and Martyrdom, in the name of my magoi, envelop me to grant me greater power. This I command of you and your household. Come forth, dwell within my body: Murmur!"

* * *

Despite their relentless attacks, Aladdin, Alibaba, Kouen, and Koumei couldn't bring it down. The borgs it kept bringing impeded any and all strikes. The Medium screeched before throwing its head back, its many limbs reach towards the Dark Spot.

"No," Aladdin breathed, veins marked red from forcing so much magoi through his body. Not only him but the others as well were at their limits. Four of them against an unharmed, untouchable Medium. "Don't—"

In the blink of an eye and before the limbs could stretch out skyward, similar appendages reached out from the mountain it stood upon. White limbs reached from the ground and clung onto the Medium, grabbing wherever they could get a hold of and forcefully pulling it down. The Medium struggled, grasping at the hands that latched onto its body but it couldn't grab them.

Aladdin couldn't understand why or how, but the Medium's hand went through the white limbs despite them being able to grab it. They had no solid form but somehow did.

"W-What are those…?" Alibaba muttered, eyes wide.

"I don't know," Aladdin replied. He stared, puzzled, at the strange limbs and noticed something odd. There was no rukh in them. Despite their physicality and force, they possessed no rukh. "Those things...aren't made of rukh."

Kouen's eyes narrowed at hearing this. "That's not possible."

Aladdin agreed completely. Everything in their world was made of rukh. As he stared at the limbs, he noticed something he'd missed before. Despite not having or being made of rukh themselves, there was still a channel—a rather small one—that carried rukh into them. It gave them form as they held on but retreated, making them lose their shape, the moment the Medium tried absorbing them.

Something was consciously manipulating the rukh inside. _"It's her."_ At hearing the soft whisper next to his ear, Aladdin spun around to find a small silhouette. It had no distinct form but he could feel it. A person; their rukh.

"Who—"

His words fall short when the silhouette reached out a languid, figureless arm. First, it pointed out to the white limbs before tracing the channel Aladdin had seen before to its source. Following its direction, Aladdin saw what connected to those limbs—or more like who.

A white, iridescent figure rose from beneath them, a blaze of bluish white fire coming to them. With her closer, it was easier to see the djinn equip. The blaze of blue and white fire had been hair. Most of it white, it spilled down her back ending in tendrils of blue flames. White silk covered her, the top wrapped and haltered tightly as it crossed over her breasts; her stomach bare except for bright blue markings. Armlets of silver and black iron decorated her as small pieces of metal—dark bismuth—protruded from her arms like tiny spiked scales; the scales iridescent blue, silver, gold, and black as the light hit them at certain angles. The scales came down to meld into thin, fingerless gauntlets of the same gemtone. A belt of black iron with ram skulls at either side sat on her hips. From them, white silks, lined in black and trimmed at the ends with silvers and blues, crossed over her hips and upper thighs tightly before loosening to flow freely around her legs. Her feet, like her arms, were scaled in bismuth up and around her knee. Hinging from the ram skulls, a thicker chain was wrapped around her hips and flowed down and over her skirts. The chains didn't look heavy; they didn't sink the loose silk. On one end of the chain and attached to a ram's skull was a black iron lantern, a bright blue flame burning in it. On the other, a small scythe with blades of bismuth, edges gleaming blue.

At first it was hard to see her face. A black iron mask shaped like a lamb hid the top half of her face and a black sash, trimmed in some white on one side, floated around her body. It wasn't until the sash _moved_ to face him that Aladdin gulped at fully seeing its face. The hound—massive and _alive_ —unhinged its jaw, letting it fall open in an unnatural way; the white mask that sat over it's face and snout glowed, its eye sockets a neon blue before changing into a bright scarlet.

It snarled, the unhinged jaw barking as it bit the air towards them. Aladdin and Alibaba visibly flinched back as it came dangerously close.

"No, Nadira."

The sash...hound—Nadira—stopped in its tracks inches in front of them. It snarled before scoffing, its colors turning back to neon blue as it returned to its master's side. From under the mask, stark blue eyes narrowed at the hound that simply cackled at its crude idea of a joke.

Aladdin blinked a couple of times at the woman. She turned her body towards them while lifting her iron mask over her head, placing it at her temple as it changed. It molded itself—like black, liquid iron—into a circlet embedded in jewels. It adjusted itself perfectly over her head, a small blue jewel pinned at her forehead. Bits of flame came down in front of her face, short strands that took on normal texture but remained blue flames at the tips.

Astonished, Aladdin and Alibaba stared at the woman they now recognized as one of the Kou Empire's Metal Vessel users: Kohaku. Koumei and Kouen, though, stared for completely different reasons.

"General Kohaku?" Koumei said, puzzled.

"Y-You have a third djinn?" Alibaba stuttered in disbelief.

She smiled warmly at them both before raising her eyes to meet a gaze of crimson tinted gold. Unlike the others, there was no amusement, disbelief, or confusion in Kouen's penetrating stare. Only a glint of betrayal.

"I will explain," she responded, her gaze turning tender for a brief second before steeling. "Once this is over and everyone's safe."

Aladdin's eyes widened at hearing her voice, this time sure that it sounded just like the one he'd heard in his head before. "You can speak."

Again, she smiled back at the him before pursing her lips. "I know you're exhausted but listen. I can hold it for a small window of time. Once I do, hit it with everything."

"What are you going to do?" Kouen's question was answered with a grin.

"Simple. If you steal from us—" Her hand reached up to pet Nadira, the hound leaning into her hand before unhinging its jaw as a guttural voice snarled, **"—we steal from you."**

With that said, she flew higher to be leveled with the Medium. Grabbing the lantern in one hand, she tossed it in front of her. The iron lantern hovered before her as Nadira slithered down her arm to engulf it in one bite. Its teeth sharpened and grew, mouth glowing blue as the flame in the lantern.

"What folly it is to snatch that which is ours," she claimed.

Aladdin watched alongside the others as Nadira grew in size while the limbs holding onto the Medium became smaller. Knowing the others couldn't very well see, he began explaining what only his eyes could. "The rukh she channeled to the limbs—she's rechanneling it to make the hound grow."

"She said she could hold him down," Koumei muttered, turning to Kouen. "What do you suppose—"

Kouen, however, didn't allow him to finish. Instead he clicked his tongue in annoyance. "Whatever it may be, we can't argue or query about it now. So long as she stops it from moving, we strike."

Unable to contradict him, Koumei nodded. "Understood."

"Get ready!" She yelled, her voice somewhat cracked. _Murur Aistirjae._ Nadira, fully grown and showing more animalistic features, pounced the Medium before unhinging its jaw and gnawing its shoulder. The Medium howled; Aladdin gasped in shock at what he saw.

The rukh in the Medium was being absorbed. Nadira, through its bite, was taking it away in great chunks, channeling it back...to her.

"She's stealing the Medium's rukh…" His eyes widened at seeing some of the smaller hands on the Medium shrivel to nothing.

"I-It's becoming smaller," Alibaba muttered. His grip on Amon's sword tightened before he turned to Aladdin. "This is our chance!" Hearing this, the four of them headed to the trapped Medium to attack it.

From a distance, priests of Al-Thamen watched in disgust at the djinn's power.

"It's robbing the Medium of its rukh," one of them spoke. "Empress Gyokuen, this djinn…"

Across the world in Kou, Gyokuen's smirk faltered mildly. "Murmur, djinn of life. That blight can manipulate anything in the last stages of existence."

"Death," the other priest answered. The two—and by extension Gyokuen—could see the rukh being channeled from the Medium to her. What's more, they could see how quickly her body was filling with magoi.

Unconcerned yet still amused, Gyokuen scoffed. "Rest assured, it will be all for naught. She is human still. No matter how much rukh she's able to rob it of, her body will succumb. It will poison and kill her before she makes a dent on its reserve."

And like she could, Aladdin saw it.

Despite his panting and exhausted body, he kept an eye on her. He could clearly see the influx of rukh that assaulted her body, filling it closer and closer to the brim. Despite this, she kept going. So far, the Medium remained unmoving, unable to remove Nadira from its body as it did the same as the limbs had done.

So long as it remained still, it couldn't regain any rukh from anything it touched. So long as it couldn't regain any rukh, they could exhaust it and destroy it.

"W-We have a chance…" he muttered under his breath. Lifting his flute, Aladdin readied another attack, "Har Har—"

" _Please, stop her!"_

The panicked voice was louder than before this time but was the same one nonetheless. Catching a glimpse of it over his shoulder, Aladdin had to turn fully to see that the silhouette from before was no longer just that. Now it resembled a perfectly clear person, a girl. She shimmered, made of rukh, but she wasn't as translucent. Her attire reminded him of the people of the Kou Empire. What amazed him more was the uncanny resemblance she bore to Kohaku.

"You. Who are you?"

The girl shook her head vigorously, golden dust flying about as she did so. _"I don't matter. Please, stop Speirr. If she continues on like this, her body won't take it."_

"Her body?"

" _You can't feel it,"_ she explained quickly. _"As a magi, the rukh reacts differently to you than it does to her. She is taking in too much. It's going to ki—"_ Her voice stopped abruptly as her body suddenly lost any translucence it had. Aladdin's eyes widened at the clear image of the girl who was no longer simply a ghost.

Tears—tangible, solid drops—spilled from her cobalt eyes as she pled once more. _"She's killing herself."_

* * *

" _You can't go on much longer, little king. You must stop."_

It was hard to hear Murmur's voice. "...not yet."

Despite the rush of magoi and power, she could also feel it tearing her apart. Even after a short time of casting _Murur Aistirjae_ , she could feel the effects of the excess magoi entering her body. Blood rushed through her veins; heartbeats sped to an ungodly pace; muscles tensed to the point she couldn't move. Her vision blurred until it completely left. Her brain fired like crazy, electricity coursing through her body. Her hearing—the one thing she always had—was heavily dulled, almost gone.

And yet she stood firm.

" _When!? Your body can't take much more."_

"Just a bit more," she said. It was hard to distinguish whether she yelled or simply whispered. "I need enough to make it implode on itself."

" _Our Extreme Magic?"_ Murmur inquired in disbelief. Despite it, Murmur remained silent as he began to understand. _"You intend to destroy it with its own magoi."_

She didn't reply. He wasn't wrong, though. The Extreme Magic she could perform with Murmur—the more magoi in her, the more powerful the implosion would be. It would detonate with what is already inside it. It would cause a chain reaction powerful enough to annihilate it.

It had to.

 _We can destroy it._

It didn't take long to reach that breaking point. The noises of the battlefield began to fade fast. Within the second, she heard nothing anymore. Darkness cosumed her. Unsettling as it was, she still felt the rush of rukh as she felt herself slowly disconnecting from her own body.

" _That's more than enough!"_

"Agreed."

When Nadira released the Medium from its bite, it took Aladdin and the rest by surprise. Free at last, the Medium let out a deafening howl that made them fall back. As they did, a bright light caught their attention.

"That's Extreme Magic," Alibaba called as he pointed towards Kohaku. There she stood, Nadira by her side with one hand holding onto her chained scythe.

"She released it to employ everything into it," Aladdin muttered.

The Medium, realizing this, lashed out its hands towards the defenseless Kohaku. Aladdin and Alibaba rushed to her but knew they wouldn't reach in time. Luckily, a streak of white and orange beat them and Kouen fended the attacks of the Medium away from her.

Turning to the others, he snarled his orders. "Keep it at bay!" They listened without question. Their attacks continued, albeit more futile than before as it began to block against them.

"Stand back!"

All of them turned to see her at the ready before they flew out of the trajectory of her attack. Determined, she brandished the scythe out to her side. "Great harbinger of rapture, let their sacrifice become your grand weapon and bring the judgement of the innocent!" All magoi in her body rushed to her scythe as the blade grew in size and took a neon blue hue, glistening like molten gems.

" _Qahr Al'ab—"_

Everything in her stopped, her hearing catching the slight sound of movement.

The Medium reacted, lashing all its hands to attack her. Slowed by her incapacitated body, she was barely able to muster Beleth's power in time to form a shield, even in Murmur's equip. The shield was weak, though, and easily began cracking. The moment she heard this, her eyes widened and dread swallowed her whole.

From where she could see, Gyokuen gave a grim smile. "Pathetic."

With force only it could muster, the Medium broke through the shield in the blink of an eye, engulfing her body whole in its hands.

Beside Aladdin, the girl felt horror drown her as she let out a blood-curling shriek. Panicked, her body disappeared and shot out into Nadira—it's blue color changing to gold.

None of them could move fast enough to stop it. It was Kouen and Alibaba that reacted enough attack and rescue her. Slashing the hands off of the Medium, they gave Nadira enough leeway to break its master out of the deadly cocoon she'd been encased in. What it couldn't stop was her from falling. Kouen clicked his tongue and rushed downward, leaving Alibaba to fend for himself, to catch the bloody mess that remained in his arm. Bringing her body closer to him, he couldn't look away from the seeming carcass. Murmur's equip had almost been completely ripped from her, her muscle exposed like his had been.

What's worse: her breathing was becoming quieter.

"Breath," he whispered, holding her closer. He couldn't undo Astaroth to heal her, not in midair. He couldn't leave the rest by themselves, either. They were both stuck.

A slight movement of her hand caught him unawares but all the same gave him some small respite. It wasn't until he saw Nadira surrounding them that he figured she was reaching out to it. The hound cocooned them protectively, holding its snout closer to its master.

" _You can't."_ Kouen couldn't understand why he could hear the voice of a child echo in the air. What he could discern was that it came from Nadira. _"You've lost all the magoi you took—even your own. You can't anymore, Speirr."_

"I—have—to." It caught him by surprise that she was even mildly conscious. He knew how painful being in her state was; to be how she and Kouha are, completely exposed, was certainly closer to his image of hell's torture. "I can't lose—them—like—I lost—you—"

"Quiet," Kouen murmured, trying not to hold her too tightly. The blood spilling from her exposed muscles was making it hard to hold onto her. The warmth—her life—was literally spilling through his fingers. "Just...breath."

The Medium, being bothered no more, reached out and pulled Ill Ilah from the Dark Spot dragging it down quickly and steadily. No matter the attacks they gave, it wouldn't stop. Ill Ilah came closer and wasn't stopping.

Aladdin couldn't keep his shout, **"Stop!"**

As if answering his pleas, a roaring lightning struck from the darkened skies straight at the Medium, severing its connection with Ill Ilah. All were in apprehension, holding their breaths at the sight of a miracle.

To Gyokuen, this was what they had anticipated. "The 'miracle' born into this world and the existence we detest the most after the 'Great King.' The First Class Singularity: Sinbad!"

* * *

It's unbearable.

No pain—none that she ever experienced—could ever measure to this one. Everything hurt, numbed, then began to hurt again with a much stronger fervor. Every little touch was torture. Despite Kouen's gentleness, it felt like he was sticking thousands of daggers into her very core. And then some. Even in her dreadful state, her mind slowly processed what her ears caught from her surroundings despite how jumbled it all was.

"K—" No. Saying his name hurt too much. _But I've got to remind him._ "—En."

"Don't speak," he said. Unsurprisingly, she doesn't listen.

"The—others—" Thankfully, that was enough to convey the idea. Through muffled hearing, she heard his voice, felt the deep rumble that swept through his body as he shouted at someone— _Koumei?_ It hurt. All movement did. And it became worse the moment she felt the wind crash against her exposed body. She wanted to scream, let out the pain anyway she could. Screaming only made it worse, though. Nothing was safe from the pain.

An eternity later the pain ended. She felt him move, felt him shout out words she couldn't comprehend. Everything was becoming less tangible. It still hurt but the numbness was lasting longer.

" _My king—"_ Beleth. _"—please, hold on."_

" _Please!"_ Marbas. _"Don't die on us!"_

" _Be strong, little king."_ Murmur.

 _I can't._ The numbness felt good. It felt better than hurting. Better than the fear. Much better than anything else. For once, she wanted to embrace the numbness.

" _You can't go."_ Her voice came. It was soothing. _"You can't leave them."_

 _It'd be better. I'd be with you._

" _And they'd be alone. They don't deserve to feel what we have."_

Her voice became clearer. It soothed her more. Felt like smooth silk against her skin, lifting the pain. "I'd rather be...with you…"

" _I know."_ Her voice begins to fade as the pain was almost gone. _"But not here—not yet."_

Without thinking, she reached out for her. What she grasped instead were locks of slithering hair. "Let go."

The baritone voice shook her as it rumbled through his body. Blinking her eyes open, a blurred focus came to them as did Kouen's deep-seated gaze. Puzzled, she tightened her hold and saw him wince. His hair—

"...sorry," she murmured, slowly letting go.

"Hakuei, take her." Her mind still worked sluggishly, so it didn't quite register when Kouen passed her onto Hakuei's arms. She could feel the princess's cold hand, moving. Alive.

"Anegimi? Can you hear me?" That sweet voice—tender, concerned—it was Kougyoku's.

"Yes," she whispered, busying herself with covering whatever she could with her tattered clothes. "I think...I'll be okay now."

She heard their gasps of shock but it didn't matter. Focusing on too many things at once was overloading her barely working mind; speaking or not didn't seem as important right now. Not wanting to be like this, she forced herself to focus. Her body had lost all pain—Phenex's work. Her ears still rang but she could hear without trouble. And as she blinked her eyes to focus, she could finally see the scene before her.

Numerous Metal Vessels and their assimilated Household Members. All of them fighting to keep the Medium down. It's borg was still active though. So long as it was, they wouldn't reach it. No sooner was her thought over that a bullet of silver shot through, shattering the borg.

Following its trajectory, she watched the forces from Reim, the three Metal Vessel users. Two of which were fully djinn-equipped. Her eyes scanned the rest of the battlefield to count. Six—eleven—fourteen. Fourteen Metal Vessel users were here.

Unbelievable.

"We have to use our djinn equip as well!" Hearing his familiar voice, she turned to Alibaba who was close enough to hear from where she stood.

Koumei was quick to answer as he held Kouha in his arms, Kouen busying himself with treating all of them. "But our magoi is already at its limit!"

That's right. She stared down at her own hands, her fingers grasping uselessly at the sand on the beach. Her magoi had been completely taken even before she could cast her Extreme Magic. Now, she was almost empty and barely hanging on by the strength Kouen had given her through his healing.

It shouldn't be possible.

" _Not here—not yet."_

Those words echoed through her head. Her pessimism had gotten the best of her the whole of the fight, but it wouldn't anymore. Even with little to no magoi—even if she had to use what her life had to give—she would not stop until that thing fell.

A sudden warmth came to her body. Gazing down, she couldn't see anything but the feeling was indistinguishable. _My magoi...it's coming back._ It felt fulfilling. It felt rejuvenating.

 _This is enough._

"All right," Alibaba called, his voice carrying over. "We can do this!"

 _Yes, we can._ _And we will._

"Murmur."

" _Of course...my king."_

In an instant, Murmur's djinn-equip enveloped her body fully as she held onto the chained scythe on her left hand. Tightening her grip, she parted with the rest into the air, following their lead. Assembled and ready, she watched the four—Alibaba, Kouen, Koumei, and Kouha—take center on the first square. The remaining ten of them took whichever spot was left.

All together, they called upon their individual Extreme Magics. She felt a slight hesitation as she brandished her small scythe. Gentle hands—ones that despite knowing they weren't there, she felt their warmth—laid over her tight grip on the weapon.

" _For them."_

 _Always._

"Extreme Magic."

" _Qahr Al'abria'!"_

The implosion and subsequent impact's explosion leveled the Medium in blinding power. They retreated as a fallout wave followed from the powerful amalgamation of energy. It wasn't until they reached the beach once more that they saw the Medium breaking down into pieces.

Despite the immense release of magoi, she somehow managed to maintain Murmur's equip. Nadira wrapped around her shoulders, protectively. Many of the others released their equip, exhausted beyond belief. Regardless of whether they could maintain their equips or not, they all watched expectantly.

But the Medium didn't die.

Her eyes wide in shock, she couldn't find words. All their attacks—fourteen Extreme Magics at the same time—did nothing. The Medium still stood. It still reached out to Ill Ilah far into the sky. But at the same time that it did, it suddenly stopped and began to grab at its head.

"It's because...the 'Medium' is hesitating."

 _That voice._

Her mind worked tirelessly at recognizing the man from years ago. His words muddled together as her mind worked on its own but, overall, she caught what was important: the Medium's hesitation is from a small point of white rukh. It was stopping the Medium. The talk about Aladdin going to see the rukh inside the Medium was something she couldn't follow, but his powers spoke for themselves.

 _Solomon's Wisdom. What an extraordinary power._

" _Leave it to the incarnation of our great king, little one,"_ Murmur said with a restful sigh. _"If it is him, he is sure to succeed."_

 _So much faith in such a small boy. Who is he?_

" _Someone important to us all,"_ he answered. _"And to your existence. But that you shall know when you have to."_

Despite his cryptic words, a weight lifted from her. At first she thought it to be relieve, but it isn't until she heard the loud clanking of metal against the ground that she turned, startled. The lantern that had been laying by her side had fallen. The flame within it slowly extinguishing.

A new, all too familiar dread filled her, making her heart stop. She'd used her Extreme Magic—it used all the magoi in her and the reserves of those she'd captured in her lantern. Now that she'd used every bit of it...they—

 _She's slipping away._

"It appears the time for you to say goodbye has come as well, little Speirr."

His voice caught her off guard and she spun on her heels to find him: the man she met after conquering Murmur's dungeon. He smiled, although it quickly turned from wry to grim as his eyes glanced past her. Turning to follow his gaze, her own eyes widen at the scene. The battlefield they'd left behind was all but leveled, every piece of nature destroyed. And yet, among the ruin, the rukh of those trapped in her lantern lingered just like the ones in Murmur's dungeon had. Not only them but also the rest she she used—all those who'd died in the battlefield during this battle as well—lingered as specters. It was a crowd worthy of a festival but none of them cheered. None looked alive; all had that same glassy and clouded look in their eyes until it began disappearing. As the rukh returned to them, they became sentient for an instant before disappearing. Slowly their rukh returned to them before leaving, just like it had in Murmur's dungeon.

Petrified, she acted on impulse. Gripping the lantern tightly, she shouted before letting it open from the bottom, its iron unhinging. Like Nadira's jaws before, it opened to maw at the ground. A surge of power coursed through the ground, touching and chaining those specters left to the ground.

A pulse ran through her body at this. She was negating the natural flow and with so little magoi to force her powers on them, it started affecting her quicker than before. She didn't care, though. Not wasting a second, she ran towards the crowd not listening to any of the calls for her. She was as deaf to them as she was to her own pain.

None of it mattered. Not now.

Her hands shoved through the many specters that howled at her—some pleading, others cursing—demanding for her to release them. Their cries weren't anything new. For years since their imprisonment, she'd heard them. They haunted her when younger. Now they meant nothing.

Pushing through, she rushed to find her. To find the one person she didn't want to say goodbye to. Once inside the crowd, she spun around in her attempt to find her. It wasn't until she saw her back—a familiar scene—that both happiness and grief struck her.

"Kohaku!"

The name escaped her lips louder than any other. Her body felt heavy, her life slipping away, but she ran towards her anyway. Reaching out her hand, she was amazed to feel under it a solid body. The amount of rukh in that lanter must've been extraordinary to sustain her form like this. She tripped a few steps as she hurried, circling to face her.

"Koha—" The name died in her throat the moment she saw her eyes: cold, white, dead.

Her rukh wasn't there.

Everything else was uncanny. Kohaku looked older, the few years younger she should've been compared to her. Even so, she could see their resemblance still. Nothing changed. Nothing but her eyes.

She wasn't truly here.

" _You must release me, little one."_ Murmur's words echoed in her head, sinking her heart further. _"Only then will she be herself again. Only then can you say goodbye."_

"I can't…" she whispered, holding tighter to Kohaku's hand. It was cold. "I can't do it."

 _I'm scared._

" _You cannot hold them here forever. You will die."_ She was about to tell him that she'd rather die than let her go. Murmur seemed to quickly recognize this and spoke before she could. _"She wouldn't want for you to do that."_

He was right. And that hurt her more. Hesitantly, she forced herself to undo her djinn equip. The chains around her disappeared as she returned to normal, the carnation hairpin falling to her side as she let go of her scythe. From the corner of her eye, she saw the chains release the others as they quickly began to regain consciousness before disappearing. Pieces of golden dust floated skyward, vanishing into thin air. It made the blue skies above her seem ethereal, bathed in golden light.

An emptiness came to her. She only had a few minutes before they all disappeared. Looking back to Kohaku, she saw her eyes still white: her rukh still hadn't returned.

Fear clutched her closely once more. She feared the scorn, the hatred. The voice from before—Kohaku's voice—that she heard for over a decade through Murmur had never been hers. Only a mimic to soothe her pain. The forgiveness, the gentleness, it was all a farce.

It kept her sane. It made her think that if anybody would not hate her, it would be Kohaku. But it was a distorted reality she wanted to believe. She knew what she deserved; it wasn't forgiveness. And she knew, the instant Kohaku regained her sense of self, she would only confirm that fear.

But for now. Just for this little while…

"Would you...hear me out, Haku?" she whispered. No answer came. None ever would.

She pursed her lip, willing herself to retain some dignity if only to not cry. It was the last thing she wanted.

"Kohaku, I—" A breath caught in her throat at the sudden whimper, but she quickly set it back. Time was wasting. And she would say what she had to—even if Kohaku would never hear her words.

An empty smile came to her lips wanting to fall. She forced it to stay. "It's very quiet in the capitol. Sousei and Suisei—they like it a lot there. They've grown up wonderfully; their smile looks a lot like yours." Wanting something to anchor herself to, she reached for Kohaku's other cold hand and held both with her own. "I'm sorry...about Masami; I never intended for her to find out. She didn't deserve to suffer like that."

 _Not like I did when Cael and Papa died._

"That pain isn't something I'd wish on anybody. Not even her." Her smile faltered briefly and she could feel the tears stinging, wanting to be shed but she blinked them away. "I know I don't deserve your forgiveness. I pleaded to god so many times—prayed for things to be different. That I could take your place and for you to be here...where you're supposed to be. For you to be with them. For you to smile. For you all...to be happy."

A small sob escaped her thinking of what haunted her every breath. A sin— _my sin—_ took everything away...from everyone. The tears finally won, spilling. She furiously wiped at them with the back of her hand, sternly trying to stop the inevitable.

"A-And nothing I—do will ever replace you." She scoffed grimly, stifling a few of her sobs and gaining some semblance of strength. "I've known pains before—losing Papa, losing Cael—and thought nothing would ever surpass that."

 _I couldn't have been more wrong._

She shook her head dismissively. "You—you were all I had left. You made me feel...like I belonged. Like I mattered. And...I lost you too." Her gaze lowered to their joined hands. Kohaku's fingers were delicate compared to her calloused ones.

Hands that have bled and killed.

Hands that have taken away the happiness of others.

 _Never again._

"But despite how afraid I am of how much it'll hurt me and them, I promise you...I'll tell them the truth. I'll bear the consequences of what I've done." Her grip loosened, her thumbs caressing the back side of Kohaku's hand. "And I'll be brave like you taught me to be. So please—" the prickling of her tears returned with fervor but she held them back. "Just for right now, please, let me stay here by your side."

No reply. The emptiness carved a hole in her chest but she swallowed the pain. Forcing a meek smile, she let go of one of Kohaku's hands before turning to face to horizon. "You would really like it at the capitol. The palace gardens are really pretty." Her smile grew a bit as she chuckled and turned to face Kohaku, "They have your favorite flowers. And the people there are really nice. I've...made friends, too."

Stark blue eyes met vacant white and the emptiness sunk her deeper, grief threatening to drown her completely. A forced smile kept her just above the surface, just enough to breath.

She wouldn't dismiss her with tears. Only with a smile—just like Kohaku always did for her.

"I've seen some of the world too, you know."

Smile. _I have to._

"Maybe...not as much as we said we would, but I've seen some amazing places."

Smile. _I must._

"The world...really _is_ wonderful and...beautiful...just like you—"

Her words fell short at seeing the vacant stare once more.

 _I can't._

Everything crashed on her in a split second. All at once, her knees felt weak—from exhaustion or grief—and gave way under her as she dropped before Kohaku. Weeping her heart out, she couldn't even hold Kohaku's hands anymore as she curled into herself.

Touching her, seeing her, it all hurt too much. Hearing her own words pierced her, knowing she would never hear them. Knowing the instant Kohaku regained the small semblance of herself, she would hate her.

The person dearest to her...would hate her. And that she wouldn't be able to bear. A part of her wanted it to be over with; for her to return and hate her just like everyone would. Like they should. Another clung to a childish hope that maybe—just maybe—Kohaku wouldn't.

She didn't know what to do: brace herself to be hated by the person she loved or hope for the impossible only for that hope to shatter.

Her mind raced but settled on one lone truth: regardless of which she chose, she would lose her all the same. Again. This time...for sure.

That tore her apart completely and she wept uncontrollably, incoherent apologies spilling in between sharp breaths.

* * *

The last of the lantern's fire extinguished, the rukh left behind flying back to where it belonged. Despite only having been a few minutes, the field was clear. All of the specters had returned to the flow. All but one.

Kohaku's vacant phantom stood before her as she wept at its feet. A woman of pride utterly broken.

The rukh that left the lantern flew back to Kohaku before giving her phantom a slight glimmer. She blinked a couple of times before the white of her eyes regained color—a beautiful cobalt. The weeping caught her by surprise and Kohaku looked down to find her friend at her feet.

Recognition of everything hit the phantom then. A small smile came to her lips as she gently knelt before her friend. Her glimmering hand reached out to her side where the carnation hairpin had fallen and lifted her hands over her friend's head.

Swiftly yet quite deftly as well, Kohaku placed the hairpin in the small bun that laid in her friend's hair. Shocked, her breath hitched as her head snapped back to look at her.

Stark blue met cobalt—eyes like Masami's, like the twins—expectantly. Kohaku smiled warmly and reached her hands to gently cradle her face. Her soothing voice quietly whispered then, Kohaku's lips moving to the words.

"It really _is_ quiet, isn't it?"

Silence came for a second. _Quiet_ , she thought briefly.

" _It's very quiet in the capitol."_

Her eyes lingered on Kohaku, equally afraid as she was hopeful. No anger or hatred marred her angelic face. She only gazed lovingly, a warm smile on her lips.

A smile like before. Like when she would—

Her breath hitched again as she began to shed tears quietly, her eyes wide in bewilderment. Kohaku chuckled a bit at this, her ghostly fingers coming to wipe them away as her own tears began falling. Unable to hold back, she threw herself at Kohaku's arms. The two embraced each other tightly as they spent their tears.

In the midst of their incessant tears—a mix of relief and sadness—Kohaku spoke. "I forgave you a long time ago, Ceara. But I'll say it as many times as you need me to." Kohaku embraced Ceara, tighter than the other, as she repeated her forgiveness. Ceara couldn't help but cry at her words. "So please—" Kohaku reached down to pull Ceara back before placing her forehead against hers. "Please...forgive yourself...and be free to live the life you want to live."

Ceara's attention suddenly broke as she saw Kohaku's phantom beginning to disappear, small golden birds flying skyward. Kohaku smiled one last time.

"Goodbye, Ceara."

All at once, Kohaku disappeared in a flurry of golden birds. Ceara fell forward, embracing the nothingness left in her place. Tears silently continued to fall as she sat up and opened her clenched hands. From them, small rukh fluttered their wings before taking flight towards the sky. Ceara followed them with her eyes, seeing the last of Kohaku disappear into thin air.

A meek yet grim smile came to Ceara from the irony of those words. The one thing Kohaku had never taught her was how to say goodbye. Yet all at once and in few words had done it.

"...goodbye, Kohaku."

* * *

"Saying goodbye is harder the second time, isn't it?"

At first, Ceara couldn't hear who spoke. Her ears still buzzed. Even as she turned, she had to blink away the tears to recognize the man from the Eastern Isles. The one who'd help her return to Shika after she captured Murmur.

He stepped closer before he knelt by her side. His eyes were the gentle color of the sky. A small, serene smile came to his lips. "But it shows how much you have grown, little Speirr." Methodically, he reached a hand out to her.

Almost mechanically, Ceara reached out wanting the support. Her grip was weak but he easily helped her to her shaky feet. Once she was sure she wouldn't fall over, she let go of his hand. He smiles at this and touched her arm, "By the way, I believe I never reciprocated your introduction. I am Yunan, a traveler."

 _...Yunan._

Ceara's mind worked slowly and she gave no reply. She was forced to think, though, when a large explosion took their attention from each other. The Medium ruptured into oblivion. Everyone around her exploded into triumphant cheers so loud that she found herself covering her ears.

 _Hurts._

"Yes, I know," Yunan responded and lets his wand hover over her. The feel of magic rushed soothingly over her and lessened the noise of the crowd along with the incessant buzzing she'd been hearing.

Lifting her gaze, her eyes came to where Kouen and the rest of the Kou Metal Vessel users stood. Unconsciously, Ceara took a step forward fully intent on reaching them but stopped in obvious hesitation as she lowered her gaze.

 _I can't go back. They heard me; they know._

A reassuring hand came to her shoulder and squeezed tightly. "What's done is done, child. Like you said yourself, there will be consequences after all that's been done."

 _That's right._

A small resolve came to her. She promised Kohaku to tell the truth. And whatever was left afterwards, she would mend however she could. That's the least she could do. "I'll bear those consequences; I promised that much. And it's not like...I don't deserve them."

From the corner of her eyes, Ceara watched Yunan purse his lips. "Your place isn't to suffer forever, little Speirr. There are yours but they shouldn't define you or your life."

"What are they good for then?" she asked unable to hold back the question.

Watching from a distance what remained made her ask. Magnostadt had suffered destruction, the world almost complete annihilation. Mistakes had been made from what she heard Aladdin say. Magnostadt's Chancellor had caused all of this; he was the cause of deaths on a massive scale. He'd caused nothing but death and sadness to many. Just like she had to a few.

The extent didn't matter, though. Suffering was still suffering. It was immeasurable.

"What can people like us do but pay for what we've done?"

"Teach." The word caught Ceara off guard, making her stare puzzled at Yunan. The magician continued with a smile. "You've committed mistakes, child. Undoubtedly, you will carry them and what is to come for the rest of your life. But you mustn't run from them. Learn from them instead. Learn and continue to live to teach others. Teach them so they don't have to suffer like you have."

 _Teach._

In a strange way, it made sense. Her gaze lingered on the young princess and prince of Kou, children she'd come to treasure as much as she did Sousei and Suisei. It followed to Koumei and Hakuei, both people she admired in one way or another. Lastly to Kouen, a man of strange ways but all the same of great virtue. In a way, she understood. Telling the truth would require for her to teach them to understand. But they had to be willing and she had to be ready.

Although she felt her purpose renewed, Ceara was afraid. And she knew she'd have to overcome that fear before coming anywhere close to teaching.

Nonetheless…

"I understand." Ceara took a few steps forward before looking over her shoulder, a meek smile coming to her lips. "Thank you, Yunan. For this and for back then."

Yunan smiled and nodded. "You are most welcome, Ceara."

Hearing that name made her pause briefly. Ceara. It'd been years since anyone called her that. The name sounded foreign and yet, inexplicably, she'd missed it. Taking a deep breath, she made her way back to the others.

Amazingly, the people she guessed were from the Seven Seas Alliance parted as she walked. They didn't seem to mind her; she wasn't a part of them. All the same, Ceara could feel eyes on her from all directions. Ignoring their stares, she quickly found herself in the middle of a circle of enemies with five people she hoped would give her the slight benefit of the doubt on what they most likely saw happen.

But hell, part of her knew they wouldn't. Regardless of the outcome, she braced herself as she came to stand before them. Their staring was more unnerving than the whole crowd's. Kouha, Kougyoku, and Hakuei had gazes full of disbelief and confusion. Koumei the latter of the two. It was Kouen's that hadn't changed. It was blank.

Ceara pursed her lips, readying herself to explain but the attempt proved unnecessary. Kouha and Kougyoku jumped at her, rambling off about many things at the same time. Questions upon questions hit her at the same time. She caught some about Murmur and her equip with him, others about how she knew Yunan. It surprised her that in the barrage none came about Kohaku or about what happened. Quickly, though, their banter was shut down as Kouen closed the gap between them with Hakuei and Koumei behind him. The younger siblings parted to give him way and Ceara saw slight concern furrow their brows. Shockingly, neither left her side; they simply gave way for their brother.

Unafraid, Ceara met his gaze, stark blue against crimson tinted gold. She waited for a verbal bashing. At least some anger. If not about what they'd seen with Kohaku, then surely about hiding Murmur's existence. Gods knew she'd seen a tick when she first equipped him on Kouen's face. But none of that came. Instead he just bore that gaze into her.

After a few seconds of staring, he sighed and turned away without a word. Overtly confused, Ceara blinked a couple of times unable to understand what that meant. Whatever it meant, the two younger siblings felt assured to come to her, taking one of her hands into each of their own.

Their grip was tight and the gesture got her to reciprocate, smiling. A small whisper came out of her as the three of them followed behind Kouen and the rest. "Thank you."

She stopped beside Kouen as Koumei and Hakuei took his other side. The sudden oppressive atmosphere cut her slight relief short. The six of them were completely surrounded by the Seven Seas Alliance. Despite Kouen able to hold his djinn equip, Ceara knew that fighting this was equal to suicide. She could clearly see the silent threats exchanged between him and King Sinbad. That itself made her become hyper aware of the man known around the world as the King of the Seven Seas.

Threats, this time verbal yet not as hostile, were thrown back and forth. Ceara caught every word and measured their options. If worse came to be, there was still a miniscule part of her willing to fight.

 _Guys?_

" _No,"_ Beleth declared.

" _Not a chance,"_ Marbas added.

" _I have to agree with them, little king,"_ Murmur replied.

All right, she was out of the fight. That left their chances if they fought quite low with only Kouen. At the mention of various trump cards, it made Ceara wonder about Hakuryuu and Judar and why the former was notably absent. Her train of thought was suddenly wrecked when a high-pitched noise caught her attention. It's not loud but it was high; high enough to make her flinch. It rings in the air and, alongside it, she felt Kougyoku's grip on her hand slacken slightly.

 _Beleth._

Using a tiny part of his powers, Ceara managed to disperse the sound, nullifying it. Oddly, she noticed Kougyoku's grip tighten once more. This troubled her but had no time to worry about it right now. It should have been easy to discard it. At least, she would've had she not lifted her gaze and caught King Sinbad's eye. The man stared at her with mesmerizing pools of gold. A crooked grin came to him, boyish yet predatory. It rattled her for some reason, sending a chill down her spine.

That smile...it was haunting.

Yunan, thankfully, smacked said king upside the head with his wand. Ceara tried hard to hide her scoff; she was liking Yunan more and more. The magician reminded him of some steps they'd taken to avoid such scuffles amongst them and the Kou Empire.

 _Scuffles?_ If he referred to such large scale intimidations as 'scuffles,' it made her wonder what the hell he'd call an actual war.

But Ceara understood Yunan's reasoning the moment King Sinbad spoke. "The Seven Seas Alliance and the Reim Empire have formed an official confederation."

Oh, that was a 'scuffle' indeed. And the more he explained the reason behind him 'helping' Magnostadt, the more he added fuel to this growing blaze.

Ceara felt Kouha's grip tighten with fury before he exclaimed, "T-This guy…! He intends to seize Magnostadt all for himself!"

 _Pretty on point._ All those pretty words just to say he'd be taking Magnostadt alongside Reim's alliance. Masami's cunning ways seemed like petty child's play compared to this man's machinations. It hurt her head to even fathom how one man could think so far ahead for such things.

Surprisingly—yet not at the same time—Kouen seemed to be the only one of them unfazed. Instead, he took his prize in exchange.

"Well, in that case, I will be taking this magi with me."

Ceara couldn't believe the image of Kouen holding Aladdin under his arm. It looked snuggly. Clearing her throat, Ceara turned a bit serious as the rest reacted accordingly to the scene before them.

"Is this really okay?" she whispered to him. "That man—Sinbad—he doesn't sit well with me at all."

Kouen turned to look down at her. He stared for a few seconds and Ceara became suddenly aware of her situation. Kouen hadn't said a direct word to her since he questioned her about Murmur. And despite the aloof gaze, she knew the man well enough to clearly see the cogs of his brain working. The sight was brief, though, as he answered her.

"If that person were just interested in gaining more territory and influence, then he would just kill us off here," he explained. "But I guess he's not such a man."

Ceara stuttered, "I-I suppose." The dispersion of tension followed swiftly afterward. Ceara stayed behind as a few things began to be prepared. A slight discomfort made shuffle her feet. At doing so, however, her vision blurred and her knees buckled beneath her. Quicker than the others, Hakuei reached her as Kouha and Kougyoku let go of her hands to help as well.

Her hearing dampened as Hakuei and Kougyoku sat her down to rest. "Thank you," she whispered, slightly out of breath.

"It's all right," Hakuei told her. "Just rest for now."

"Yes," Kougyoku reassured her. "Everything else is being prepared for our departure. You worry about resting, anegimi."

Their concern surprised her, no matter the times she saw it. Kougyoku perhaps didn't fully grasp what had happened but Hakuei was more than aware, of that Ceara was sure. The first princess wasn't as dull or naive as Hakuryuu sometimes made her out to be. The same could be said about the three brothers. If anything, she was certain Kouen could piece everything together if he hadn't already. The thought filled her with a familiar dread—the kind she felt every time Masami would threaten her with spilling this secret. But it dissipated when she remembered Kohaku's and Yunan's words.

" _Be free to live the life you want to live."_

" _Learn and continue to live to teach others. Teach them so they don't have to suffer like you have."_

Remembering brought back the pain of her loss, though.

This was a wound that would take more than time to heal...but at least she would try. Surely the pain wouldn't ever disappear, only dull. But from it she would learn and live to teach. Ceara hoped to find a way to make that theory work in practice. Someday. But acting now would be asking too much of her. She needed a bit of time to rest, for the pain to recede. Just a little. And she wouldn't have it if the truth went out publicly.

Ceara noticed that after barking his orders, Kouen remained behind with Koumei and Hakuei. Kougyoku stayed with her, and Kouha settled in the space between them.

Those five were here. They had been the only ones to see what had happened. The only ones who had an inkling of what they had seen and how it implicated her in; part of it, at least. They knew who she was, not what she'd done. Although she didn't know which was worse, she knew that this way she could at least do some damage control.

Shuffling her legs beneath her, Ceara attempted to stand but found it hard to, weak as her body was. Kougyoku was the first to help her and Kouha, seeing her struggling, raced to her side. She thanked them, not caring that they—or the other three—heard her voice. She only had a few minutes before Kouen's Household returned to take them back to Balbadd. If she was going to stop this at the source—if just to give her time to prepare herself—then she'd have to do it now.

"I know it's not my place to ask this of any of you," Ceara began, turning to look at each of them in turn before continuing. "But please, whatever the five of you saw or heard...don't speak about it to anyone."

Understandably, the majority of them seemed puzzled at her request. The first to ask anything were the youngest two.

Kougyoku's came first rather quickly, "About that strange djinn and the woman from before?"

Kouha's brow knitted together in confusion, "Why?"

To both their questions, she answered with a small smile to placate them. It did neither. Kouen, however, was quick to shut her down.

"What makes you think I'll allow that when we don't know who you are?"

The question—and truth—struck her hard but Ceara took the blow. Taking a deep breath, she gave her reply, "I understand you're upset and wary—" _certainly more betrayed than anything,_ "—but all I did was never with the intention to deceive you. Even if that is what I ended up doing."

Kouen was adamant, though. "It matters not. Believing you is out of the question. Not unless there's strict reason to."

As hurt, mentally and emotionally, as she was, Ceara was getting fed up with his caution. _Had I wanted to do something, I'd had done it ages ago._ But she held her tongue. Antagonizing him would serve only to aggravate his already sour mood. If anything, indulging his obsession would serve her better.

The stupid idea didn't seem so stupid the more she thought about it and it made her bite her cheek. It was worth a shot.

"You let this rest and I'll tell you everything." Ceara's gaze didn't waver from his. She stood her ground. "Everything _and_ anything you ask."

He scoffed at this. "What assurance do I have that you won't lie now like you've done so far?"

"That you know will cost me nothing," she replied without hesitation. "All I want is for this not to spread to my family." Ceara pursed her lips when this doesn't seem to convince him. Instead she goes with what she had always stood by, the only truth he knew of her from actions alone. "It already tore myself and another to pieces. I don't want to cause them anymore grief. We—they just lost their parents. I want to protect them from anything else that would harm them. Myself included."

Silence came quickly thereafter. Ceara couldn't do much more than stare at Kouen as he silently made his choice. The aloofness never dropped, like always, and it made it harder for her to grasp any sort of nuance of what he thought. Thankfully, there wasn't much waiting there for her to keep guessing.

"Fine." A small smile came to Ceara at hearing those words. Kouen swiftly shot any relief of hers down as he turned to face the other four. "None of you shall speak of what happened or what you saw concerning this woman. None of you are allowed further contact with her, either. I will deem whether her word is trustworthy anymore."

To her utter shock and disbelief, Kouha and Kougyoku immediately spoke up, clearly against this ban. Their little turmoil was quieted in an instant though as they cowered against Kouen's stare. Yet, despite quieting their verbal protests, they stayed beside her still holding to either of her hands. This brought a sincere smile out of her.

"I can't understand why you're still by my side," she said quietly. This time it was their turn to glare at her, more peeved than angry.

"I don't care who you are or aren't," Kouha exclaimed, face a tiny bit red. "You're still you, name be damned."

Kougyoku fervently agreed while nodding her head. "Kohaku or not, you're still my anegimi. I'll believe you all the same."

Their words warmed Ceara but her eyes wandered up to the rest. Koumei and Hakuei, even after helping her, remained skeptical. She couldn't blame them, though. Looking at both sides, she noted something that unsettled her. Koumei and Hakuei hadn't argued against Kouen's orders. Kougyoku and Kouha had. In an instant, her problem had created a crack in this family. One that if she left alone, could grow.

 _No. I won't let it._

Ceara squeezed their hands tenderly and gave them a smile before undoing her hands from theirs. Kouha and Kougyoku looked up at her clearly puzzled. She didn't give a reason and instead took them both by the small of their backs to push them towards the rest. The small shove placed them halfway between their family and her; a step closer to where they belonged.

"Listen to your brother," she told them with a meek smile as she held onto herself. "All he wants if for you to be safe."

The two gave her a puzzled look. By being forced, however, it seemed Kouha understood a bit better. He took Kougyoku by the hand and promptly took her to Kouen's side. Their reinforcements soon came, ready to take them to Balbadd. All the while, Ceara remained close but just a few steps behind.

Seemingly a part of them but never truly there.

Frankly, Ceara understood the prohibition Kouen had placed on them. In some way, she thanked him for it. At least, this way, it gave her a reason to stay away.

After all, she had already torn one family apart. She wouldn't do the same to another.

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _After proofreading this, especially so close to a date my family and I find mournful, it made me tear up a little. It's hard to say goodbye and it's never really enough. To see a person you love so much leave the world is painful, I'm sure many of can attest to that. If not, I'm envious and empathetic all the same. I hope you never have to experience this._

 _It didn't hit me as hard as I was writing it, more so while I read it. Regrets hit hard, especially after time has passed. A year really isn't enough to dull the pain. I doubt ten, twenty, or thirty will. But I have hope that we'll get better._

 _I'm sorry there's nothing happy to read in the A/N this time. Although few, I will still thanked the lovely people who Favorited, Followed, and Reviewed (those who I couldn't reach)._

- **Guest:** _First of all, I thank you for the constructive criticism. About Hamilton, yes, I peg myself guilty over that (and not mentioning it in last chapter's A/N). I admit as I reread it, too, it was perhaps too much on the nose. As for the POV change, I caught the instances of that. Although I won't go back to fix them (at least not anytime soon), I will try and avoid that problem in the future. Hopefully my attempt at keeping POVs distinct worked here. (Thanks for the examples too! They help as reference). Overall, I'm glad that despite all this, you still enjoy the story and I hope to hear from you again._

\- **Kiwichan916**

 **\- chocolate-is-the-best**

 **\- XxGrimshadowxX**

 _Again and like always, I hope you enjoyed this chapter and stay tuned for the next update. As a small thing, I'll this behind: a quote I really love and makes things a bit better sometimes._

" _Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."  
_ _ **Dr. Seuss**_


	9. A Vassal's Duty

_**Chapter Nine:**_

 _A Vassal's Duty_

* * *

Fate certainly worked under strange circumstances.

It was the only explanation Ceara could think of when it came to how she and Kohaku met and, how through subsequent years, their paths had kept crossing. The events that transpired during her childhood were years that she had purposefully buried in her mind. It took time—and help—for her to bury them deep where not even she would find them, but now that was exactly what Kouen wanted of her.

 _Fate, you cruel bitch._

But she supposed it also fell on her. After years spent hiding, Ceara had grown to excel at such art of her own accord and necessity.

Kohaku's death had been Ceara's secret. It should have stayed her secret but her melancholy along with her inexperience had blown that lid open during a couple of occasions. One, then another. Those were inconsequential, though. One was dead by fate's cruel hand; the other threatened her with the truth. For years that had been Ceara's norm and she had grown to cope. For years she abandoned her own name and took over Kohaku's place, supplanting the General's second daughter.

After so many years, she thought she had perfected the act to the point that she forgot herself. 'Ceara' had ceased to exist and she rose as 'Kohaku' from the tragedy that changed their lives. Sad to say, though, the tragedy never disappeared. It only followed. Pretending to be Kohaku had not been as easy of an idea as her then eleven-year-old self had thought it to be. Occasionally before, the two had scurried from Kohaku's tutors as simple servants, and because of their resemblance to one another, no one questioned when they saw either. In their eyes, it was Ceara, not Kohaku; a servant not their liege. The reverse proved harder to retain on the long run. When it barely happened, Kohaku's ghost lingering within Murmur could have very well been a blessing in disguise. Although she knew it to be Murmur mimicking Kohaku, hearing her voice, speaking to her, made coping a bit easier. Sweet lies spoken by Murmur to Ceara as comfort for something neither of them could change.

And yet it changed, although not in the way she imagined it would. After Magnostadt, Kohaku had finally left Murmur, her soul—rukh—returned to the flow. And now five others knew the truth: she was not Kohaku.

The first few hours after having left Magnostadt had been spent in denial for her. All the way to Balbadd, Ceara spent in silence and apart from the rest. And despite what the others might have thought, Ceara spent that time convincing herself of the truth. It took Murmur assuring her multiple times for it to cement itself; she had equipped him, used his Extreme Magic, and had freed Kohaku.

" _Not only her, little king, but hundreds,"_ he assured her, as if that made the situation any better. It only served to remind her of how many she had killed in an instant and the many more she unknowingly trapped while learning how to wield him over the years that followed. It reminded her of the reason she had abstained from wielding him in the first place. But using him after so long also brought back an odd feeling: control over the uncontrollable. A djinn of life; Murmur wasn't the conventional definition of it. From her vantage point, when she thought of Life djinn, she pictured Phenex or Zagan, beings that brought and gave, well, life. Murmur could do neither. He was a djinn of life able to control the dead. Grim as it was, he was useful and, aside from that, turned to be a loyal djinn and compassionate friend. Even after Kohaku's death and Ceara's supplantation, Murmur didn't vilify or derogate her choice.

" _I'll stand by you, my king, no matter your choices or what may come"_ had been his last words before she heartlessly vowed never to use him again. At first she had kept him where she could reach when nightmares came to her, sometimes in places she knew were safe, and during times of grief or uncertainty never too far away. Regardless of where it was kept, Ceara knew not to use it. She knew well of the voices that would haunt her, voices of those trapped in the lantern like echoes floating through dense water, lethargic and incessantly long.

Now empty, there was nothing but quiet as she held the carnation hairpin in her hands.

They had arrived safely at Balbadd and the battalion was quick to disassociate as Kouen gave his orders, many of which Ceara turned an intentional deaf ear to.

"General Kohaku." Ceara turned out of habit to meet Seishuu's pensive gaze. The serpent Household Member had been the most amicable of the four and although she could see that such aspect hadn't fully left him, she could spot the slight detriment, like dark clouds over clear skies, that shadowed his sight. "The young master has requested I accompany you to where your siblings are."

Curious, she looked over her shoulder at said man. Unawares of the scrutiny, Kouen continued ordering what officials he had at hand as Koumei followed swiftly behind. Both worked like a well-oiled machine and it surprised her somewhat that they found the time to assign her a custodian, especially one of his own household. It took staring a minute too long for Kouen to finally return the stare. She didn't look away even with the gaze that threatened to bore holes in her. It was a small exchange of a few seconds but she had spent the better half of a year deciphering the man. To her, it was easy to discern what the one look meant.

" _Precaution."_

If against what she would or wouldn't do or to ensure her safety after the battering they took at Magnostadt, she wasn't sure; although, she could take a pretty good assumption and say it wasn't the latter. But Seishuu, or anybody else for that matter, would receive discipline from not following orders where she was concerned. So Ceara gave him a sturdy nod despite hating that she would be babysat from now until she met again to talk to Kouen. And that without knowing if he would revoke the ban on her. If not, then this would have to get use to this and _that_ would certainly take time.

For the time being, however, Ceara nodded and followed behind him despite the stares she felt follow her as they left. Her mind worked slowly taking in every detail of the residence that Kou had built in Balbadd for their royal prince and governor. Odd but expected; she'd seen such abrupt transformations before in major cities or towns she herself had seized in the past. Unification of the world was what Koumei called his brother's ideal.

Unification through cultural and ideological genocide.

Although she agreed that something must be done about the state of the world and all the atrocities and grievances that were happening, she didn't think that such decimation should be the price. History, no matter how flawed, had a purpose. A concept she recently learned.

 _We learn from our mistakes which is why we should never forget about them._ History shouldn't be rewritten to suit a purpose, cultures shouldn't be broken and remolded, minds shouldn't be manipulated. But that was exactly what the Kou Empire, and by extension she as one of its generals, was doing. Contradictory didn't begin to define it.

 _Then again, I've lived a life of contradictions. What's so different now?_

She wondered the same thing.

" _ **Haku-nee!"**_

Sousei's and Suisei's cries cut her train of thought short and, for once, Ceara was thankful for that. Her mind had become a poisonous labyrinth with every thought she had hurting her further and corroding her from the inside out. Hearing the twins and having them there with her cleared up the toxic fog. Her emotions and theirs won out at seeing her and she them, and without much thought, Ceara ran up to meet them and cradled both in her arms. Their bodily warmth washed over her like sunlight, their voices, albeit cracked or crying, were a blissful reminder that cemented her vague sense of purpose in her cluttered head.

 _I may have lost Kohaku but I won't ever lose you._

Ceara held onto them for dear life feeling tears ready to spring anew as her mind raced with what the future had in store for them. Time was wasting; for as much as she wanted it hidden, this secret would reach out sooner or later. Afraid as she was of what it would do to their relationship, she knew the time for lies was over.

 _Not now,_ her heart pleaded, fighting sternly against what her mind knew to be the right course of action. _It'll destroy you._

And Ceara listened to it despite not completely understanding why. To say anything now would mean facing the unthinkable. She had done enough of that to last her a lifetime; she needed time, just some to let the pain of losing Kohaku dull. Let the wound scar before opening it again.

 _How long?_ She had no answer to that question and it petrified her.

Instead of dwelling on what was to come, she immersed herself in the pleasant feel of their embrace, holding onto them like her only refuge from a depthless ocean. Because that was what it felt like. Ceara was stranded with only them as lifelines and, without them, she might as well be dead.

Pulling them at arm's length, Ceara brushed her hands against theirs flushed faces Wiping their tears away as they sprung anew. Their eyes, a darker cobalt, gleamed in their tears but their smiles of relief overwhelmed them. They must have heard about what occurred in Magnostadt, the near-death experience most of them had, from someone. The thought of never seeing them again overwhelmed Ceara and made her eyes sting.

Fear didn't strangle her to silence unlike many times in the past. For once, fear opened her lips letting her vocal chords vibrate.

"I love you both."

Their relief changed in the blink of an eye as whimsical wonderment took over them. For a second they appeared to be younger, toddlers wondering at tricks. But this was no trick, it was the truth.

 _Start small._ It was the only consensus her mind and heart could reach.

"It's real," she mumbled while stroking their heads. "Sou, Sui, it's real. I'm okay." Reaching out to them, the twins didn't falter. They're confusion changed into pure glee as they embraced her tighter than before. She did the same, repeating words she deeply wanted to believe. "We'll be okay. We'll be okay."

False hope or not, it was all she had to hang on to.

* * *

Despite how much more she had wanted to spend with them, Ceara found her time with Sousei and Suisei cut short at Kouen's orders after two days of their arrival.

"The Tenzen Plateau?" She repeated it, the taste of the words sour in her mouth.

Although Kouen debriefed the three of them on the matter, Koumei was the one that decided to clarify. Ceara met eyes with the Second Prince and for a split second saw nothing but a collected semblance. Although used to it, Ceara believed she had built good relationships with many at the palace that went past crude glares and sneers. Whatever walls she had built, however, seemingly crumbled after what had happened. In a way, she felt like time had rewound and she found herself in the midst of the Imperial Family of Kou, citizens before their royals. They weren't Koumei and Kouen anymore, they were the First and Second princes of Kou. And despite spring beginning, warming the already lukewarm air around Balbadd, Ceara couldn't dismiss the chill that came over her.

"Yes," Koumei replied with a nod. "Sousei and Suisei will be accompanying Princess Hakuei and Kouha back to the Tenzen Plateau."

Sousei was first to step up. "Excuse my asking but for what purpose exactly?"

Koumei sighed. "To watch over the Dark Spot that remains open over Magnostadt."

"Is that really a four-man job?" Suisei asked meekly.

Ceara didn't dismiss the low exhale coming from Kouen, clearly exasperated by their inquiries. It sounded odd to her as well but she hadn't the mind to ask herself. This wasn't an arbitrary choice knowing them. Kouen especially wouldn't deviate forces like that, not after what happened and certainly not with King Sinbad looming over Kou with his newly formed Confederation.

 _Then why?_

Questions from the twins kept coming, passive aggressively at times, and Ceara could sense Kouen's temper starting to rise. He might be aloof and collected but he wasn't a man of limitles patience, that much she knew. Not wanting anymore dissonance where there wasn't a need, Ceara gently touched them effectively quieting them down. Silence reigned until Ceara spoke, "Will this be permanent?"

The one question asked more than any of theirs had and she purposefully worded it so. Her eyes locked with crimson tinted gold at asking. Ceara didn't want an answer from Koumei. The only one who could answer her with any sort of definitive response was Kouen.

Undeterred by her gaze, Kouen complied. "No. The deployment will be for a month. If by the end of that month there is no more need for them, they are free to return."

A month. They would be away for a month. There still was no word from Masami either. As far as they knew she had been dealing with their parents' passing in Shika after recently getting approval to return. Ceara doubted she even was aware about what happened at Magnostadt. All three would be away from Balbadd.

 _He's giving me time without them here._

It was the only logical conclusion she could muster. A month without any of them gave her some liberty. It would let her talk to Kouen and keep her side of the bargain without fear of being discovered.

 _How conniving._

This wasn't just to give liberty; it gave her a strict deadline that spoke loudly of what he expected. Kouen wanted her to tell what she promised within that month. The consequences of not adhering to that she could only guess, but in the end it gave her time alone. Ceara only hoped it would be enough.

Reaching out to them, Kohaku got their attention with a tug of their wrists. Both turned to face her still perplexed about the whole situation.

"It'll be fine," she assured them with a small smile. "I'm safe here, and with your Household Vessels, I'm sure you will be too. Besides, you'll be with Hakuei and Kouha and I can't think of a safer place out there."

Suisei pursed her lips, wide-eyed and full of concern. Sousei could only glare, peeved at her words. Ceara couldn't blame them. During their short time back together, she had told them briefly about Magnostadt—what she could, anyway—and about how she regained her voice with Kouen's help. They were grateful she hadn't died and that she could talk again after so many years but that didn't dissipate their worry as they very much told her. She knew the feeling, it was something she felt constantly for them, but she couldn't let it takeover now.

 _Just this once,_ her mind told her, _they'll be fine._

 _For their sake, I hope so._

Ceara gave them a gentle smile before speaking again. "It's only a month, Sou, Sui. We'll be fine."

Sousei was the first convinced, or at least conscious enough to not argue with her quiet plea, and turned with a nod to Kouen. "Apologies about the queries, General Commander. We will do as you ordered."

"Then prepare," Koumei told them once the two heard their agreement. "You will leave tomorrow before dawn."

There was no more arguing after that. As they were leaving, however, Sousei paused before scoffing. Ceara and Suisei stopped briefly, surprised at his sudden noise. "You two go ahead."

"Sou?" Suisei murmured under her breath, holding onto Ceara.

"Don't worry, it's just some issues I have to deal with," he assured her with a pat on the head. His eyes came back to Ceara before nodding.

Ceara's gaze bore into his but she saw no lie or misdirection which made something clear: whatever he had to talk to them about concerned the Reizei Household. Stroking Suisei's hand to calm her, she gave them both a smile before answering. "We'll wait for you to have dinner," as she said this her eyes wandered behind him where Koumei and Kouen were. "Don't be long."

He nodded and Ceara did her best to drag Suisei out without her throwing a tantrum. Thankfully, she didn't and it allowed Cara to hear a snip of the conversation as it began on the other side of the closed door.

"I received your letter." _Letter?_

"Do you have an answer?" Kouen.

"I agree to your terms," Sousei breathed, defeated. "I'll cede—"

"Haku-nee?"

Ceara blinked at Suisei's interruption as she kept dragging her along, farther away from the council room. Through Suisei's talking, Ceara tried straining her ears more but only managed to catch a few more words.

Isles.

Marriage.

Official.

Her heart plummeted. Their engagement—Kouen's engagement. It must be further talk about it. Ceara wondered how much more they would delay the ceremony or if they were already planning for it as they spoke.

 _Don't think about._ Now, more than ever, those words seemed to do more harm than good. She had lost one, still had two, and never had the third. Maybe a whisper of the last—a kiss that had been surprisingly gentle—but nothing more. And she would never be a concubine second to Masami. Never again second to Masami. _Then again_ , her mind thought critically, _you might not live much longer to think much about the problem._

Certainly that would be the worst outcome. One that was too real of a possibility. Thinking more about it, Ceara figured worrying about Kouen and Masami's marriage was idiotic in her situation but there was no helping it. Her mind spoke logic, her heart didn't. She listened to neither instead choosing to spend the day she had with the twins before sending them off with Kouha and Hakuei.

Three days of their company was all she had to console herself with. Ceara hoped for the best and that three days' worth of smiles and laughter would be enough for the month without them. There was no time for her to dawdle on that thought because Kouen appeared to have no intention on letting time go to waste.

"A meeting?"

Seijin nodded with a slight grimace, one she replicated at hearing their first prince's order. Ceara had hoped to spend sometime arranging the soldiers' records and some skewed numbers Seijin had pointed out before but it seemed that Kouen had a different idea of quiet afternoon.

Seijin tidied up the desk she sat before, a habit Ceara had noticed he did when anxious. "His words were a bit more—" he pursed his lips, wanting to find the right word, "on the strict side. He did greatly emphasize that I shouldn't let you slip up like you usually do."

Ceara stiffened at hearing that. Kouen shouldn't have had an inkling about her wanting to relax by going to town.

 _How?_

Beleth and Murmur had the same idea: _"He knows you well."_

She scoffed at hearing that; what Kouen knew was from months on end of time spent together and his calculative mind. But she digressed. If Seijin was there to keep her from running away and ensuring she went to that meeting, then not attending would be bad for him. In the end, she had no other choice.

Dread had piled up in her over the few days of knowing she would have to confess the better part of a lifetime of lies. It'd be hard, of that she was sure. After all, many things were hard to remember after purposefully burying them in the depths of her mind. Even now, thinking as hard as she could and leaving her work aside, she found it hard to recall specifics.

" _You think better when distracted, my king,"_ Beleth explained. _"Forcing yourself won't help."_

" _I could help."_ Murmur meant well with his offer but Ceara knew not to take it. Seeing what a soul and it's rukh harbored was a power of his-sometimes even a able to conjure specters-and it would vividly show her those latent memories. The bad thing was that it would vividly show her those latent memories.

 _Thank you...but no. I would much rather remember by myself._

Beleth was right. When distracted, her mind wandered onto connected topics. Surely, if Ceara let it, her mind would work by itself. But too much distraction wouldn't do, either.

She needed something that would use a part of her mind that could work easily by itself; a task that needed logical thinking to let the rest speak freely.

A brilliant thought came so suddenly that it got her to smile. _Of course._

"Jin?"

Seijin lifted his gaze from the neat stack of papers he just finished putting in alphabetical order. "Yes, miss?"

"I need you to look for something," she replied. "And I need it for the meeting."

* * *

The afternoon came without many troubles overall. Balbadd was a country that despite its previous state ran itself well. The Kou Empire's tactics of changing the country from the inside also helped everything run smoothly. One would says that perhaps it was peaceful enough that even as governor of Balbadd, the First Prince would have little to no trouble managing it.

Kouen highly disagreed. After all, this whole 'governing Balbadd' was becoming cumbersome fast with the plans he had laid on conquering further across the sea that divided the east and west. Although he had wanted to use Balbadd as base to further his objectives, governing the country was a tedious task. More so with the recent issues that had presented themselves recently.

Alone in a study made specifically for his personal use, Kouen sighed exhausted lying back against the sturdy cushioned armchair and letting his hold on a scroll slacken. Truly this was a dull position but it had to be taken. Small things kept him occupied, though, and yearning for the future to come. The promised meeting with Aladdin was one of them. It had been only a few days after they had returned from Magnostadt and the little magi had already sent word of the Summit meeting both Kou and Sindria would attend in two months' time.

"I'll keep my promise," he had said in his letter. "But it can wait."

Not to Kouen it couldn't. Two months would feel like a lifetime knowing that what he'd been searching for years now was just within arms reach. Knowing the truth was there but being able to grasp it was torture in itself and it soured his mood plenty. Perhaps that was what had him peeved now but he couldn't tell and couldn't care less. All Kouen knew was that it infuriated him at worst and kept him constantly annoyed at best these last few days.

The door opening and footsteps quietly approaching caught his attention briefly. A small rattling also accompanied the quiet stepping as a figure turned the corner to the interior of the study.

"Am I interrupting?"

Kouen couldn't keep the sigh that escaped him at seeing her. _Speaking of distractions._

His crimson tinted gold eyes met stark blue ones. As Kohaku—no, _Ceara_ approached, Kouen could tell something was amiss. It was subtle—slightly dark circles beginning to form underneath her eyes, a small paleness that contrasted her usual fair complexion—but he knew to look for subtly where others were concerned. A subtle glint in the eyes or quirk of the lips told more to him than words did; it told him hidden intentions that most thought were perfectly hidden behind petty smiles or conniving words.

Staring at her, though, Ceara showed only a small smile as she came to stand before his large desk. Wrapped in her arms was a rectangular wooden box, checkered in black and the beige of the wood. He eyed the piece briefly before meeting her eyes again.

"No," he replied as he closed the scrolls. "Just looking through documents of Balbadd's state while waiting."

"Must be bothersome," she said with a small scrunch of her nose. "Being governor of Balbadd aside of being General Commander of the whole of the Western Subjugation Army."

Kouen offered no confirmation or denial. Instead he veered their conversation towards another topic. "I'm surprised Seijin managed to keep you within the palace walls."

She chuckled, empty as it sounded, before replying, "I didn't want him to get in trouble. But had you sent him a few hours later, I would've been out already."

Kouen had guessed as much. Their training always appeared to be more productive through the evenings; he surmised after a while to keep more intense things for later in the day. Her being predictable came in handy at times.

Digressing, Kouen gave a nod to the wooden box she held. "What is that?"

Ceara gave the box in her hands a brief glance before putting it down on the desk. Placing some of his scrolls neatly to the side, she took out the wooden pieces of beige or black and opened the box to lay it down. As she began putting pieces in their place, her eyes avoiding his, she spoke. "I had Seijin look for one. Luckily not all were destroyed when we came to Balbadd." Once done with placing each in place, Ceara took a nearby armchair and sat across from Kouen, letting her hands fall to the either side of the board. The same empty smile tugged at her lips as she explained further, "It's very much like Xiangqi, except they call it chess around these—"

"Intentions aside, this time isn't for entertaining either of us," Kouen swiftly interrupted. His tone had grown a bit brusque but he didn't give it much thought. Ceara's expression changed for a mild second, her smile disappearing and exchanged by a purse of full lips.

"I know," she replied lowly as she met his eyes. "It'll make it easier for me, though—this distraction. I'll be able to think clearer about things that...I don't like remembering." She lowered her gaze and reached out for one of the beige pieces, fiddling with it at the edge of her fingertips.

At meeting his gaze again, Kouen's stare became fixed upon hers. There was no hesitation or even sadness; all he saw was an emptiness tinged with desolation. It made her once stark blue eyes seem bleaker. Disregarding his mood for a moment, he found it in himself to agree and gave her a quaint nod in the board's direction. The bleakness disappeared for a split moment before it returned as she made her first move.

"My brother taught me how play when I was younger." Kouen watched as her gaze didn't leave the board. Her nose scrunched up childishly, the light of her eyes returning as she spoke. "I wasn't any good at it, though. I liked watching him and Papa play better."

"You intend to drag this on, don't you?" he asked not moving an inch to make his move. He was already irritated, although it showed only through his mild tone of voice, and having to hear her drawl on about her infancy wasn't something that appealed to him.

There was no missing the small glint of playful mischief that came to her eyes as she smiled. "I promised to tell you the truth. Never said at whose pace. They were vague, after all, the terms you set for me." A long, heavy sigh escaped her lips then as her eyes wandered over to the pile of scrolls he had been reading that she had set aside for their game before turning up again. "Besides, you seem like you could use a break with all that's happening. Maybe this and my little story might help clear your head."

A single eyebrow was all he raised at this before he sighed himself and made his move. Seeing him comply made her smile grow. She peered at the board thoughtfully before making her move and continuing with her tale. "It was calming to see them play; it was one of the few things we did together as a family when I was small. But even those times tended to be scarce back then," her shy smile molded into a thin line, "especially with Kou's seizing of Kai and Gou going on in the background."

Gou and Kai. Those were names he seldom heard with any frequency nowadays apart from his history scrolls. The simple mention of that time painted well the situation she described. Back when Emperor Hakutoku took to arms for that crusade, there had been a conscription for all capable young men of thirteen and older. It had been an unnecessary measure, though. In reality, that conscription served the purpose of gathering the meager 12 percent of prospects that were on their younger years. Fealty was what many had for the Emperor and his sons in spades, himself included. He wondered for a moment if her brother had as well or if he had been one of those conscripted.

"Because of the war, I was left alone in Shika. Caretakers that could've cared less about their own children if they had any took care of the children left behind by the conscriptions. But because of the sheer amount of us, I would easily slip in and out with no one noticing. It was during one of these usual outings that I came across a little girl and helped her back home."

Kouen was quiet and paid attention to the game and her story as bothersome as that was. _Patience,_ he reminded himself, but to ask that after days of pent up frustration was certainly a great task. Nonetheless, he mustered what he could and moved one of his black pieces to take one of hers. Ceara cringed at this.

A small crooked grin came to the side of his lips but he languidly hid it before leaning his chin against his fist, arm propped against the armrest. "Focus."

Mimicking his posture, she stared wholly at the board and every piece that laid there. "My father died a year after he went out to battle. Thankfully, my brother hadn't. He had made quite a name for himself as the right-hand man of General Koujiro; he even said that he was somewhat acquainted with Emperor Hakutoku and his sons. But mostly the general." Her index finger came to tap at her lower lip before a smile came to them and she moved another of hers to take two black pawns of his in return. "It was two years after he joined the military that he told me that it wasn't good for me to be left by myself for such long periods of time. What he was _trying_ to do was softened the news: he had wagered me off as a vassal to General Koujiro's second daughter. And as fate would have it that second daughter was none other than the little crybaby I had walked home two years before."

"Wagered," he repeated. Although it didn't sound like a question, she took it as one and shrugged her shoulders.

"He never really told me any details. Just that he and Koujiro had spoken and that they had come to some sort of accord. I'd be safe, well fed, and sheltered. I suppose that's what mattered to him." She sat back, her fingers drumming at the end of her armrests. "I didn't really like him for a while because of that. Back then, I thought he was doing this to rid himself of me. Like I was some sort of burden to do away with." Ceara scoffed as her left hand reached back to take the carnation hairpin from her low bun. Leaning forward, she held the piece between her fingers, caressing gently the silver flower.

Kouen watched the small action curiously. Intentional or not, he recognized the same fondness she often saw the twins, Kouha, or Kougyoku with. It appeared to be of considerable importance aside from being Murmur's Metal Vessel. She only affirmed that assumption.

"He gave this to me before he left that first time. It's part of a set; he has—… _had_ the other."

He was reaching for another piece of his with the intent of ending the game as soon as possible when he heard this, stopping him in his tracks.

Carnation hairpin. Light brown hair. Stark blue eyes. Issues with temper. Before, these only seemed to be coincidences albeit eerily uncanny. It could have had been his subconscious reminding him of what had happened long ago when he was younger and had recently captured Agares.

 _Perhaps not,_ he thought.

"What was your brother's name?"

Ceara looked up, her blue eyes wide, bewildered by the sudden question. Her lips parted slightly but she said nothing. It wasn't until she shook the initial surprise away that she answered.

"Cael of Ériú."

Quiet filled the space between them for a few seconds. Ceara watched his hand closely as he reached over to another piece and simply moved that one-instead of taking three of hers like he'd previously intended, he took nothing. Her eyes scanned the board and quickly found a move; she took three of his own instead and called, "I believe that is check."

Kouen sighed at this and shook his head lightly. Cael of Ériú; of course, it was. He promptly took one of his pieces, undoing her check and coming to one of his own. "Check."

The elation she had deflated at that and Ceara sat back with a groan, watching the board meticulously with her eyes tracing every other pattern available. He stared at this as it was clear that her mind was elsewhere as she had yet to notice him staring.

"I hated it at first," she confessed, arms crossed before her as she huffed in her sit. "Headstrong as I was, I hated having to follow orders. I suppose having been so carefree when I was younger led to that."

Despite his aloofness, Kouen couldn't help the scoff that escaped him. "You make it sound like you've outgrown that part. I certainly can attest to the contrary."

Such statement made her chuckle. Another beige part moved. "Time quickly went by and the more I spent with Kohaku, the more I began to realize that it wasn't so bad—she made it fun. Back then education was prominent in my schedule as vassal; I had to know how to read and write, and that was besides the arithmetic. I abhorred it, I suppose, like any child would. The things Kohaku taught me, however, were a completely different story. It was from her that I heard about the world, about other cultures, about things my young mind could have had never fathomed. The topics fascinated me as did her take on them. It truly astonished me that she had grown so much in those short two years. We became friends very quickly. It came to the point where she became as important to me as Cael was. Unlike the rest of her family, she treated me like her a equal."

He heard her take a breath and took the chance to move one of his knights. Once he placed it down, she touched the ebony horse idly with one of her fingertips, fidgeting with it. "I never understood how, it just happened gradually and I accepted it as fact. She was the closest thing I had to a friend." Kouen's eyes followed the glint of her blue eyes as it returned and a flush came to her cheeks invigorating her features as she airily chuckled. "There were times when we would sneak out of the estate when she nagged me about being too bored of her studies. Other times, she would simply ask me to go in her stead. And truthfully, through the years, I became eager to learn and her lessons were most intriguing, so I didn't really have a reason to say no."

Kouen's brow furrowed. "What do you mean to say?"

"We would switch places," Ceara admitted. It took a few seconds for her lips to purse into a thin line but the dust of pink and glimmer in her eyes remained at recalling those moments. "When I would go to her lessons, she would wear my clothes and I hers. When I took her out to enjoy Shika's marketplace, she would dress in a spare change of mine. In either case, no one was the wiser."

This perplexed Kouen. "How come?"

Ceara kept quiet for a moment, the light atmosphere around her steeply declining. "A cruel jest of fate, I presume. It's all I can find to explain such thing." She exhaled before leaving his piece and moving one of hers: a bishop. "We weren't related, of that I'm sure. I've gone extensively through records before, and aside from our mothers originating from the Eastern Isles, there was nothing else connecting us. But considering this was years ago, it makes sense now."

It did, indeed. Kouen could see how that, despite being highly improbable, could very well happen. The Eastern Isles—or Isles of Icaunus as they were known back then—had remained secluded to themselves for years before they opened their ports to foreign trade. Isolated as they were, it made it likely for its denizens to have been of very specific ethnicity.

 _But for two unrelated girls to appear that much alike,_ he thought. The chances of what they had found were truly unbelievable.

"It still amazed me, though." Kouen came to look at her as she stared up at the ceiling, contemplatively. "Even after three years of serving her, we grew to resemble each other just the same despite my being a couple of years older than her."

But that must have meant that their resemblance had to be eerily uncanny. Even with the absurdity of their similarity accounted for, the fact of their age difference didn't fit. "Two years? I'm having a hard time believing that with such gap you would still be so much alike appearance-wise."

Ceara shrugged at this and stared at the board, waiting for him to make a move. When he didn't, she sighed knowing what he wanted from her: an answer at best or an opinion at worse. She decided for the latter. "I've had problems before because of my birth. Cael told me that I was born prematurely so it made sense. My mother lived to take care of me for almost a year before she died of complications after trying to conceive again. I never questioned it—are you going to move or not?" The terse tone she took made Kouen raise his eyebrow. She pouted as her brow knitted together, annoyed. "You're taking an awful long time."

He waited a few more minutes staring her down just to annoy her more. It wasn't until her childish pout turned to a frown that he scoffed and made his move, taking two beige pieces in his wake. Ceara groaned frustrated but stopped and took a deep breath before releasing it. The action caught his attention, it was how he had taught her to calm down during stressful situations that made her anger spike. All this was stirring her emotions.

"I digress," she called, her tender voice back to normal. "The fact of the matter was that we grew closer through the years and it made Cael's absence bearable. He came and went, at times lasting longer than I would have liked. He always came back, though; that was something that I could count on." A grimace came to her as she leaned her chin in her palm. "That changed the third year close to my eleventh birthday. The battalion had returned from a six-month expedition but...Cael wasn't with them. I had to beg Kohaku to take me to General Koujiro for information. I wished I hadn't."

Leaning over from her chair, Ceara breathed deeply through her nose as she stared intently at the board yet at nothing at all. "He told me Cael had died. That's all he and anybody told me." The grimace from before turned into a full-blown scowl. "That, a cracked sword, and monetary compensation as if that would have quelled the grief of losing him. The bastards took him as another casualty of the many and hanged me out to dry in my grief. Their ignorance only made me angrier. The night I found out about his death, I ran away from the estate."

"What exactly had you in mind after leaving?" he inquired.

Ceara didn't reply immediately. Instead, she reached for a random piece—a knight—but did it so clumsily that she toppled it over. Rather than putting it back in place, she made a rash move. Rashness, that was something he hadn't seen from her in a long while. He said nothing as he watched her take one of his rooks.

"I just wanted to get away," she answered matter-of-factly. "The Eastern Isles were all I could think of from stories Cael told me of back when he and our parents lived there. Miserable as I was, I snuck into the first ship I could to get there. Once I did, I began hearing strange rumors."

"Of?"

"A strange structure that had risen out of the blue. Some were saying that it was much like those that had appeared in Parthevia and around the world."

Kouen didn't need to guess. Making a simply move of one of his bishops, he managed to check her. "A dungeon."

Ceara continued undisturbed by his interruption or move, much more focused on her story. "I overheard the people saying those dungeons contained immeasurable power, something beyond anybody's wildest imaginations. Powers known to do extraordinary things; things some even considered miracles."

Kouen watched closely as her eyes glazed over. Her hands closed around each other and her fingers began to dig into the heel of her palms, white surrounded by red forming from the pressure.

"A miracle was exactly what I wanted," she murmured, "no matter how stupid it sounded. So, like the idiot _I_ was, I entered the dungeon with Cael's sword and the few supplies I had left from the journey and ended contracting the djinn inside."

"Murmur." Neither of them needed to verify what he said. But one thing did confuse him from such rushed explanation. "You captured Murmur at the age of eleven?"

His surprise didn't shock her, either because she didn't notice it or didn't care for it. Undoing the grip on her flesh, she took the hairpin from where she had laid it at her lap and stroke the flower again. This time, though, the gesture seemed much more conscious as if she were trying to qualm some sort of inner demon. The action itself contrasted greatly with the meek smile that came to her, calm yet troubled all the same. The two emotions bled into each other, changing her expression to one of cool nonchalance. She was trying to hide.

"He convinced me not to hate death or want revenge. He said I shouldn't taint the love they had left me with my ill will. I understood somehow even through my sadness. In the end, I made a promise: I vowed I would use him only to protect, never to kill."

Either daring or helpless, Ceara took her queen between her fingers and moved her to take a knight and rook from him, leaving it defenseless in the process. Kouen saw the move for what it was: risky but necessary.

"It's a promise I have kept to this day. Murmur said that he recognized his virtues in me; I never figured what he meant, though."

Mention of her third djinn made his mind wander back to Magnostadt. Her pledge to summon it made him recall of the other two she possessed and to what her djinn represented about her.

Vainglory and Champions.

Nature and Ferocity.

Innocence and Martyrdom.

Each suited her one way or another. Those traits described parts that made her whole, the good and the bad. Especially the last one.

"Innocence and martyrdom: they suit that trait of yours," he added.

Unable to understand, her nose scrunched this time out of confusion. "Trait?"

"That unconditional affection you give to others." It sounded corny to his own ears but he couldn't find any other way to describe it. What he had seen of her any time she was with her siblings, with Kouha or Kougyoku, with Seijin, with his own Household Members, with Koumei, even to some degree, he believed, with himself. Her affection—be it out of respect, familiarity, or sheer kindness—was earned but after it had been it was akin to the very air they breathed.

Always present and never faltering.

A laugh came from her light like it had been when she recounted her times with Kohaku. Kouen's brow furrowed though unable to comprehend what had been comical. Seemingly wanting to appease his confusion, she shook her head and waved her hand dismissively. "It's just that you've never called it anything other than a folly. Hearing you call it a 'trait' for some reason—"

"You find that amusing?"

"Plenty," she admitted, a chuckle bubbling as she tried to control herself with a clear of her throat.

He hadn't. Not when he was being truthful for once.

Despite keeping his guard at knowing her previous lies, he couldn't help the serenity that he had come to expect from her presence. Although it had been far from peaceful when they first met, he had to admit that she brought a sense of calm after they had become comfortable with each other's company. He found her nature quite aggravating at times because of how extremist she was. She could show affection with the same intensity that she showed hatred, loyalty, or grief. Yet all the same he found that effortlessness to express herself compelling. To his surprise he couldn't keep such sentiment to himself.

"It's proven its worth." Ceara's laughter died at his stern tone, her eyes coming to meet his blankly. "It makes you loyal and powerful yet fragile all the same."

He couldn't dismiss the quizzical light in her eyes. "That is—I don't understand how that makes sense."

This back and forth was getting lengthier than he anticipated at first and her lack of understand was also running his already thin patience low. Deeming an example much simpler to explain and to understand, he chose one. "You're a diamond-edged sword. Used correctly, you are a massive weapon able to fend of anything in your way. Used wrong, you will shatter under the gentlest wisp of air."

Clarity shone in her eyes but her expression shadowed instantly. "I disagree." The answer was curt and short, and he could see why she would give such reply. After all that had happened, what still remained to come was looming ever closer threatening to encroach and engulf her. A month would go by in an instant and broken as she was now it was evident to Kouen that this diamond sword was close to her breaking point.

It was apparent that it wasn't just him that needed to forget about duty for a while. Kouen sat back, leaving the game for a moment, as his mind came with the one question she had still to answer.

"How was it that Reizei Kohaku died?"

A bitter grimace immediately fell upon her at the query. A hand of hers brushed through her hair anxiously as she placed the hairpin back in place. With nothing else to hold, her nails began digging again onto her flesh this time biting and dragging lines of red at her palm. Kouen clicked his tongue at seeing this and rose from his sit to reach over. His large hand dwarfed both of hers in his hold, her eyes wide staring back up at him.

"Don't."

A whispered apology came and she separated her hands, letting him sit back down. "Force of habit," she rectified as she rubbed at the scratches. "Pain distracts me." She shook her head before smiling, the emptiness returning and the gesture not reaching her eyes anymore. "I'll do my best to stop."

She was proving to be more trouble than he expected. Distractions; now he understood the reason for the game. Not wanting for any further self-harm, he made his move and a knight fell to one of his bishops.

As if threatened, she sunk back into her sit, hugging her legs to her chest as her eyes and mind became lost watching the board and the tiny pieces still left.

* * *

"Back when Kou had just been established thirteen years ago, do you remember the attack that struck the Reizei estate?"

Her question was only to delay the conversation but if she had to start anywhere it would be wise to know what he knew about that incident. Kouen's aloof expression didn't change—not like it had during their whole one-sided conversation—but Ceara did notice the scrutiny as he searched for an answer.

"Yes," he replied matter-of-factly. "It had been an ambush in the middle of the night, one that left a good number dead. And if I recall correctly, it was an attack by a foreign force and they burned the estate to the ground."

Ceara nodded at that description. It certainly left some things up for debate but at least records didn't steer too much from the truth. The fact that it had been attacked by 'foreign forces' and had burned down weren't wrong. It was why the Reizei family had gone to live in the Imperial Palace for a year over a decade ago. Emperor Hakutoku had wanted his oldest friend and ally, along with his family, to be secure from any that might pursuit such ambush further.

 _But by then, all had been set in stone._

"In fact—" Ceara lifted her gaze to watch as Kouen sank into a thoughtful posture, his back straightening and sight searching far off. "Witnesses claimed to have seen some of the soldiers that had attacked: soldiers of white being killed but not bleeding and disappearing without a trace."

Hearing the description of Murmur's power made her stomach turn. _Aldundina Almarida_ —the same magic she had casted to summoned the dolls that drew back the Medium back in Magnostadt—were nothing but her control over the rukh of the dead. Hundreds upon thousands that she had collected and bid her will upon…just like the specters from Murmur's dungeon.

A light of recognition came to Kouen's eyes an instant later, narrowing on her. "You attacked the Reizei Household thirteen years ago?"

The accusation hit her harder than she thought it would, moreso coming from him, but she was quick to dispel what clear-cut conclusion he had come to.

"I-I hadn't meant to," she countered but stuttered, rendering her objection mute in her ears. Nonetheless, she continued wanting to clear his erroneous assumptions. "That night, I overheard General Koujiro planning to send off a vanguard of conscripts to the southwest for the continuing expansion to the west."

The memory ignited remnants of her anger. Even after their countries had been united, there was no peace. Cael's dream of wanting her to live and grow in the peaceful nation their sacrifice created died with him with nothing being done to stop the nonsensical violence. The establishment of Kou hadn't been enough—Emperor Hakutoku wanted to continue expanding, continue conquering.

"They wanted to expand and more young men—boys like Cael ripped from their homes and loved ones—would die." Her stomach turned again, her palms clammy and the feeling of Murmur's chained scythe still palpable in her fingers. Her mind struggled to decide whether she wanted the feeling to leave or remain and in the end simply grasped at empty air, making fists with her hands. "I couldn't let that happen again." Taking a deep breath, Ceara attempted to relax but was unsuccessful. The anger was still there, crawling under skin raising the hairs at the back of her neck. "I headed to the barracks that night, and even when I had only just managed to djinn weapon-equip Murmur, I knew there had to be something I could do."

"You attacked the barracks."

His answer told Ceara that he was following her jumbled train of thought just fine. He knew like she had back then that if she would have destroyed the barracks, possibly even run some soldiers out and mildly injure them, they'd be unfit to participate in battle. In her childish mind, it was the better option. Rather they be injured than dead.

She reached out to take a knight in her fingers to move it but when she felt a throb of an increasingly painful headache, she unconsciously reached up to massage the pain from her temple. The beige knight stabbed at her head and Ceara quickly released it, the piece clattering against the board clashing against other pieces and ruining the game. Frustration came out of her in a long, heavy sigh and instead of fixing the game, she clung her legs closer to her body with one hand while rubbing at the side of her head with the other.

 _It hurts._

The throbbing only grew as she thought more about it but she forced herself for once and continued. "I tried but…things went wrong."

 _Much like they've done before._

Murmur's warmth and soothing words echoed in her head as she struggled to remember that night, but not even he could qualm the emotions that ran rampant even now. "I resented that no one had tried helping Cael like I was doing for strangers. That anger triggered the empty shells created by _Aldundina Almarida_ to act. They're nothing but extensions of my mind taking form with the rukh of the dead, they act from what orders I give, conscious or not."

" _You couldn't have stopped them,"_ Murmur reminded her.

She knew. And perhaps the fact that she had unknowingly sentenced so many to die that night was the true horror of what she had done. They were innocents she had judged and had called for their execution.

The soldiers only followed orders.

Dread and guilt sank hard into her stomach, a ball of heavy lead sitting and poisoning her from the inside, as she shrunk even further into her chair, wishing to disappear as her mind rushed through what she could remember. Ceara scanned the board in front of her, the only distraction left even in its state, her eyes fleeting rapidly back and forth as if searching for an answer that wasn't there.

She was forcing herself to remember now and it was making it harder to do so. But no matter what she did, all she could recall were loud sounds, scenes that flashed behind her eyelids when she blinked, or harsh smells impregnated in her nostrils, but nothing concrete. Closing her eyes, Ceara searched through all the pieces she saw before finding one to focus on.

It was Kohaku, shouting for her.

"Ce—" The deep baritone sound of Kouen's voice, along with the sudden touch on her shoulder, wracked her brain at the sudden interruption. On instinct, she jumped out of her chair, toppling her chair as she untangled her feet from beneath her. She began falling back and out of fear reached out luckily taking hold of Kouen's arms. Standing up, she could feel herself panicking, the loud _thud_ of the chair clattering to the floor making her jump in her skin.

It sounded like wood breaking under pressure. Crackling from fire. Panicking screams of people running. Kohaku shouting her name. Kohaku's body and Ceara's tiny hands holding the dying girl in her arms.

Her hold tightened at recognizing the few instances from the plethora of fragments, her fingers digging into fabric as she grasped desperately at Kouen's arms. A muffled voice called out to her—Kouen's—but she couldn't answer. The commotion that echoed incessantly in her head didn't let her make out anything of what he said.

There was no need to, though. She felt his touch, warm against her chilled body, as he walked her to a windowsill and sat her at the edge. She felt the solid form of it but for a second had to look around to remind herself of where she was. Warmth came to her shoulder and made her gaze up to meet dark crimson irises specked in gold.

 _En?_

The sudden focus allowed her ears to clear from the voices in her head. "You're not there," he said, repeating the same phrase a few more times. "You're alive; you're here."

 _I am?_

That's right. She wasn't at the Reizei estate. This place wasn't ablaze. Kohaku didn't need her help. Kohaku was already dead.

The facts that ran through her head dampened the noise in her head to a low ringing. They were there but quietly at bay. It wasn't until she could hear her own breathing that she blinked and looked down at her hands still grasping tightly to his arms making him bend down somewhat as she sat on the windowsill. Feeling how strong her grip was, Ceara slowly released it as she stared blankly at her hands.

 _They're not small._ She ran her hands down his arms, wanting something secure in case she lost it again, but stopped as her hands came to his. They were bigger than hers but both were larger than the ones she remembered holding Kohaku's dead body. _They're grown._ She felt the pressure in her chest ease as she took long breaths. The panic ebbed the more she took deep breaths, shaky as they were.

" _My king?"_ Beleth's, Marbas', and Murmur's voices mingled and bled into each other, their concern more than obvious from her little episode.

"I'm okay," she said to them and to Kouen. "I—I think I'll be fine…for now."

Kouen took his hands back and Ceara hated how much she felt his absence. Wandering back to his desk, he straightened the chair that she had thrown before going for the pieces of the game that had fallen.

Nothing but the sound of him as he went about came to her ears. She didn't speak; neither did he force her. There was a quiet agreement of ceasefire after the unexpected episode. Her thoughts wandered, the noise still resonating at the back of her mind, as she recalled having them when she was younger. Back when she had just taken Kohaku's place, night terrors woke her early or didn't let her sleep at all. They were torture and often appeared too real not to be. She had outgrown them, only having them the rare times Masami's punishments reminded her too much of something, or so she taught. Never had something as simple as a question or touch provoked her like it had a few minutes ago.

"We have a month to do this." The sudden break of the silence she heard with those words made her turn to Kouen as he stood before her. His eyes were fixated on her as he continued. "Forcing you to the point where you suffer a panic attack won't help either of us. Go rest."

 _No._

The tight hold she managed to take on his sleeve made him stop in the middle of his leaving. His eyes stared down at her while she stared at her hold on his sleeve. "No," she repeated, "I want to go on."

Despite the terrifying episode she had just suffered, Ceara felt a tinge of relief amongst the pain and panic. Telling someone about who she was and what had happened felt relieving. The only other person she had ever told this to had died long ago but it had felt similar.

" _The truth shall set you free, little one,"_ Murmur explained, the buzz from the noise coming behind his words.

But unlike Hakuyuu, Kouen asked when things were unclear. Hakuyuu offered solace; Kouen offered clarity.

 _I need that._

"Can I…continue?"

Her question went unanswered for what seemed an eternity and for a moment she thought Kouen would just outright refuse her. To her surprise, however, he just sighed and walked to the other side of the windowsill and took a sit. While she faced the study with the window to the outside gardens at her back, Kouen sat to face her with one leg propped against the pane while the other reached to the floor below.

"I'm listening."

Ceara nodded once, her arms coming to hold herself as a chill ran down her spine when she laid back against the window.

"I ran back into the estate when I saw the fire the soldiers started. I couldn't dispel them, no matter how hard I tried and undoing my equip did nothing." Thinking back about it, she remembered Murmur telling her how the soldiers functioned. They were an attack hard to control and wouldn't disappear unless forcefully disbanded or destroyed, or if her magoi ran out. The latter happened much too late. "I ran searching for Kohaku and found her crying, searching and shouting for her sister and parents. I didn't think—I took her hand and dragged her behind me to look for a way out."

She let go of her arms but stopped shortly when she tried digging into her hands. Instead she occupied her hands elsewhere, brushing her fingers through strands of her hair.

"There was no way out," she said. "What's worse the specters were coming after Kohaku. I fended off as many as I could with Murmur's scythe. But I was tired. I didn't see…"

A pause came before her whole body began to shiver as she curled into herself and away from the window. Not wanting to face the floor, she turned to the side to face Kouen. Unfortunately, his gaze was lost to the outside garden. Tucking her legs closer to her body and leaning her chin on her knees, Ceara followed his line of sight to watch the night that had come sooner than she had expected. Outside the leaves drifted down in the evening breeze, dew glimmering in the moonlight. For a moment, she forgot they weren't in Rakushou. For a moment, she imagined herself back in the palace with the twins, Seijin, Kouha, and Kougyoku. That calmed the growing turmoil in her mind.

As sad as it was, the time she spent there had been the most blissful and tranquil time she ever had. And soon those times would be spiteful to remember when she found herself without them.

 _Because once this is known, I'll lose them all._

At least someone will know her side of the story. That itself brought a small semblance of comfort and enough strength to resume. "I heard Kohaku yell my name just before she pushed me and I tumbled out of the way. When I turned, all I saw was Kohaku's—" Ceara gulped as her hands crawled to her abdomen, a pain hitting her at the mere thought. "One of them pierced her." Ceara shook her head as her hands scratched at her temple as she struggled to recall the scene.

She felt Kohaku push her and heard her scream cut short. She turned to find her pierced through the stomach in her place, a soldier standing behind her.

"E-Everything's muddled after that." Taking a deep breath, she let her hands fall from her hand and went back to staring outside, ignoring how badly they were shaking. The darkness from the gardens contrasted much with the orange-yellow glow she remembered from the fire or the translucent white of the specters. "I r-remember running to her. I remember holding her."

Her eyes wandered down as she opened her quivering palms; they were clean but she could spot, even now, where the blood had stained them. No matter how many times she cleaned them, she couldn't rid her mind of the image. The sight of Kohaku weak and dying, her blood pouring, warm and thick in her hands as she tried stopping it from flowing.

"She was warm, she was shaking, her eyes were wide." Ceara could feel herself shivering as her hands shook faintly at first before it became more than noticeable. "I think…" her voice trailed off as she closed her hands, "she said she was glad…and cold. I screamed and I—…I passed out."

Drops fell to her closed hands, shocking her. Reaching her fingers to her eyes, she wiped away at the tears that had begun to fall without her knowledge. "I killed her," she confessed, "and I imprisoned her."

"She's gone back." Kouen's reminder is stern but gentle at the same time and it shocked Ceara to hear those words from him. "All did when you released them back in Magnostadt."

Blinking a couple of times, she nodded. Out of habit, she asked Murmur to reassure her of what they all knew.

" _She's gone, little king. All of them are."_

The assurance calmed her but also stung deeply. The tears fell more at that reminder. Wiping them away, she took a few deep breaths to calm herself. "When I woke up, Masami was there by my side. I tried speaking but my throat and lungs burned." Her hands reached to it feeling the scar but knowing that it hadn't been that which prevented her from speaking. "The smoke I had inhaled had caused damage; I couldn't talk for a while. Not even when she kept calling me Kohaku. I knew I had to tell the truth and I had convinced myself I would the moment I regained my voice."

"You didn't."

That was more than obvious. "It was odd. When people thought I was Kohaku, they treated me kindly and lovingly. Koujiro and Lady Arianna called me their 'daughter,' Masami called me her 'little sister'."

 _I forgot…what it felt like to have a family, to have people who loved me._

"It came to the point that, even after I could speak again, I couldn't bring myself to tell them the truth," she whimpered. "I didn't want them to suffer like I had. Losing Cael had been the worst for me. I couldn't bring myself to cause them that same pain." Ceara's eyes closed as she leaned forward against her legs, "So I decided to keep Kohaku's death to myself to save them the pain. Better that I carry that burden myself than have them suffer for my mistakes."

Her fingers reached back to touch Murmur's Metal Vessel and felt his warmth like a shawl keeping her from the cold. _"And I support your choice even to this day."_

Taking one last deep breath, Ceara turned up to Kouen who was now looking at her with that same intense stare. She hadn't noticed when he had stopped looking to the outside but was glad she wouldn't have to catch his attention. "And, well, I made my choice." She gave him a small smile that barely tugged at the corners of her lips. "Thank you, Kouen, for listening so patiently."

She had lost count of how many times silence had come over them. By now, it didn't feel awkward anymore. It was just another part of how it had come to be between them. For once, she appreciated the quiet. It allowed her to think and realize that someone finally knew.

That truth held a lot. It terrified her, haunted her, but now it released her. If just for a little she felt herself breathe a little easier.

"Who else knows?"

Unconsciously, her body stiffened at that reminder. When she began shaking her head, she stopped at hearing Murmur.

" _Tell him the truth, little king. Kohaku wouldn't want for you to suffer for what she already forgave you for."_

Ceara nodded her head slowly, his words seemingly enough to convince her. "One other, but I can't tell you their name."

"How come?"

"I'd be risking the same secret I told you," she admitted. "You and the other knowing is manageable. But if either of you knew that the other does, then everything will be revealed whether I want to or not."

"You are making this much too complicated," he declared sternly. "This web you've built won't last forever. Secrets like these eventually rise to the surface—yours more so than any other."

Even she wasn't stupid enough not to see that. "But it'll give me time."

"Time for what exactly?" he asked, his voice slightly tinged in annoyance.

"To keep it away from Sousei and Suisei."

"Then when do you intend to tell them the truth?"

Her lips pursed, uneasy. "When I'm sure they'll be fine without me. Until I can make sure they'll be all right, I do whatever it takes."

It somewhat amused Ceara how much of Kouen she had seen in one night. The man had remained his usual nonchalant-self for the the majority of her exchange but somewhere along those lines he began to falter. Her anecdote had kept him enthralled enough for him to be lenient with himself. Even if only a little bit, she had seen a couple of emotions she had never seen from him before. They hadn't shown in his facial expression; they never did. But his actions spoke louder than his features ever did.

Moves he refused to take. Words he chose carefully before saying. Actions he took with a clear intent to help her. Despite what animosity had grown between them because of her lies, she couldn't deny that in a very peculiar way of his he cared.

"You're not afraid of them not being all right without you. What you're truly afraid of is that they will be."

 _What…?_

Wide stark blue eyes stared back at him, astonished at such declaration. But her heart tore at hearing a truth she knew too well but ignored with every breath she took. Sousei and Suisei were the last good thing about her miserable life as Reizei Kohaku. She had grown caring for them as she knew Cael had for her; she taught them and grew with them. They were loyal to her as Household Members and as her siblings. But that loyalty was only skin-deep. When the moment came for them to find out the truth, they would leave her…just like everybody else had.

 _But this time it will be much worse because…I brought this upon myself._

* * *

Ceara of Ériú.

Kouen doubted that the woman in front of her remembered that name. By the way she so blankly stared at him, he could tell that much about her as Ceara. The woman understood by her sheer reaction to his statement what truly had her stranded, pleading for time. She was trying to protect where she believed she belonged.

After what she had told him, he could surmise as much. Being alone for so long, unable to substantiate her place in life or the people in it, she had grown lost. No place took her, no person claimed her, and the few who did died. Only people accepted her which explained her dependency on those who did. She anchored her existence on the relationships she had with others. Losing them to death was like losing a part of herself, but that was the kinder option when compared to them utterly rejecting her. If the latter were to happen and they knew of the truth and hated her for it, it would shatter her sense of belonging. If they didn't accept her, there was no place in the world for her to be.

It was easy for him to understand with this that Ceara never intended for her secret to be discovered. She had intended to take the secret to her grave to uphold whatever sense of self-preservation she had.

But now, if unconsciously, she sensed that self-preservation being threatened and was fighting to keep herself afloat. That was a losing battle, though, and he knew one when he saw it. A single person keeping a secret could work. The same couldn't be said about a group.

 _No one can keep to themselves for long._

His train of thought stopped short when he heard Ceara take a deep breath. He met her tired gaze and vacant blue eyes stared back. "I hope my answer was satisfactory."

"It was," he answered nonchalantly, "I understand what circumstances brought you here as well."

"Mm," she hummed, breathing deeply and brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. Her lips pursed as if wanting to say something and Kouen, not wanting anything to be left unsaid, urged her to speak if there were still things to be said. "It's more of a request," she admitted. The mention of such piqued his interest and allowed her to continue. "I know it may be too much to ask but could you possibly postpone whatever plans you have for my execution for as long as possible?"

"Execution," he repeated the word, feeling the thought somewhat souring his mood.

She nodded. "I came to terms long ago that if anybody were to know then I would surely be sentenced."

Listening to her reasons brought some clarity to her thought process. Legally speaking, yes, she had committed murder and not just any, either. She had caused the death of a Kou General's daughter. If word came out of what she had done, she would be executed.

 _However…_

"There would be no merit in executing you." His words brought confusion to her and made her query what he meant by that which he answered. "You are a multiple Metal Vessel user and that in itself makes for a better counter argument in favor of pardoning your life. Of course, the condition of you swearing fealty to the Kou Empire and to our cause as Ceara of Ériú would be mandatory to consolidate your vow."

"But without a doubt, after you achieve your goals, the Reizei family will call for retribution," Ceara commented, her hand reaching up to her neck and fingers brushing against her scar. "It's only just."

"It would appear you and I have differing notions of justice."

"If so, then my respect for you has greatly diminished." The statement took Kouen somewhat by surprise. She could certainly be argumentative but she had never voiced her displeasure about others. At least not verbally which is why that outburst caught him unawares. "I have committed murder, treason, and impersonation; those are hefty grounds by themselves. Pardoning should be out of the question. You want to keep me alive to use me, fine; do it. But don't take away what's due to the Reizei family for what I've done."

"You search for appeasement where there is none," he explained. "All you want is to buy more time to achieve an impossible goal. You claim that you wish to protect them from the truth and avoid their resentment, but you can't have it both ways. You are fighting a losing battle and no one will go unscathed from it."

Her stark blue eyes glazed over contrasting much with her glare, her hands shaking as she gripped tightly at her skirts. A frown came to her before Ceara shook her head to clear it. "I don't care what happens to me. I love them too much to see them hurt because of me. They're my everything…and I would give anything to protect them." The animosity she had mustered disappeared in an instant. A crooked grin came to her lips as the unshed tears began to pool, "But they've made carrying this burden easier. With them, I have what I did with Cael and Kohaku. But—" the tears finally fell as her voice cracked, "it'll always haunt me that they love the idea of who I pretend to be, not who I am. I've already been hurt enough, so I can deal with more pain—they shouldn't be subjected to the same because of me, though."

Despite her roundabout logic and the jumbled ideas, Kouen could understand what she meant. She cared enough about them that what befell her was insignificant but at the same time they were what she had pined for: a family to love her. Her mentality didn't change reality, though. The course of action she was dead set on taking would inevitably destroy her as dependent as she had grown.

Her goals contradicted each other. No matter what course she took, they would all suffer from this secret when it surfaced.

 _But that doesn't mean the pain can't be ameliorated._

"I will not back down," he confessed after a quiet moment stretched between them.

"You're an idiot." Kouen felt a small tick at his jaw from the childish jab. Regardless of how genuine it sounded, he knew it was meant to instigate him. Masochistically, she wanted to be punished for what she had done. Certainly, guilt brought that upon her. But he knew better than to fall for such childish attempts.

"Regardless of your opinion, I stand by my decision." Kouen straightened as he could in his position and stared her down as she glared at him. "I will not condemn you based on actions you took as a child. You have grown to suffer through the consequences of your actions alone; that is a life sentence of its own you will not escape."

Action, or the lack thereof, created guilt where there was a difficult choice to be made. If he knew anything about it, guilt drew people to extremes as it almost drew him to after he returned from conquering Astaroth. He had been absent from the fire that overtook the palace close to a decade ago and anger and resentment almost drove him to attack those responsible. But he refrained after a mind full of grief and anger had dulled and he could think rationally once more. He couldn't go against _them_ no matter how much he wanted to avenge the Emperor and princes. Instead, he nested both that regret and evil amid their country to better use them until the day came where he would rid himself of them.

That day certainly fell well into the future but he would make certain that it came. In a way, he understood how regret could poison her so easily. Unlike him, she had lost everything through her own choices and that made the guilt that much heavier to carry. Regardless of how the future treated her, she would carry that regret for the rest of her life as he knew he would carry his.

"A child like you that knew nothing of the power she carried or how fickle her own emotions were shouldn't be liable for actions you now regret." Her disbelief was clearly etched on her face, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape. "When the truth comes out, I will waive your execution sentence as I previously stated if you vow loyalty to the Imperial Family as well as to our cause."

The confusion and anger her eyes had for most of that exchange simmered out like a small ember being doused. The gleam of light never left them, though, and simply softened as a crooked smile curved her full lips upward. "I couldn't possibly vow to your family more than I already have even if I wanted to," she told him softly. Her eyes came down to her hands as she wrung them. "You've all grown on me much like my own has."

"Very well." Kouen sat back as his mind rushed through what other things were still left to be discussed. Despite his promise in exchange for the truth, and apart from the few discrepancies he wished to talk about, one problem still plagued his thoughts. But it could be fixed with one small arrangement. "In addition, I would also like for you to make a more personal agreement."

"Personal in what way?" she asked curious.

"Tell them the truth." Instantly, the color drained from her face and her eyes widened like a small rabbit caught in a predator,she sight. Before she could form any coherent thought to refuse, he spoke, "I'm not asking for you to do so now. Thirteen years of keeping this secret will not allow such thing, of that I'm certain. But you cannot go on covering the sun with your finger like you've done so far." That fearful expression didn't leave her and instead grew with his words.

The idea itself had never crossed her mind it seemed and it didn't surprise him. All her efforts had gone to hiding the truth for as long as possible, not confront the situation. But passively approaching this as it was would not work anymore, he was sure for that, and Ceara needed to understand this.

"Some of us know already and from what you said, only I and another know the whole truth," he commented, collected for the two of them. "Rest assured, I will keep my word, but even if I order them to, I cannot be as confident about what others will or won't do. Your little glass case has begun cracking. It's only a matter of time before it collapses on you."

"And I'll be ready for that when it happens." At her answer, Kouen shook his head.

 _She's still running._

"That is exactly what I'm warning you against," he said. "Don't let it come and catch you off guard. Make the first step and manage what happens as you let it come to you."

Offense was the better defense. In her case, it was more than true. If she let this spiral out of control, it would strike her hard. If she controlled it instead, she would be prepared for whatever came at her own discretion.

But the mere idea seemed to disheartened her. Ceara shrunk back into her sit, wrapping her arms tightly around legs as her eyes averted from his. "I can't" was all she whispered before shutting her eyes. "I'm not ready."

He sighed at hearing this. "I understand what afflicts you now."

"...what is it?"

"It is difficult to explain," he began as he let his head fall back against the wall. "What I can tell you definitively is that you need to learn to detach your existence from that of others." The scrunch of her nose and furrowed brow made it even clearer to him that this would be harder to explain to her more than anybody.

Ceara of Ériú had incurred a blindness unto herself the moment she became Reizei Kohaku. Illustrating his point to her on this matter would certainly be like describing the wonders of the world to a blind man.

But he would try.

"You are your own person, with or without them, Ceara." Hearing her own name made her blink furiously as that blankness disappeared from her gaze. She met his then and listened intently like a small child. "You exist and belong because of what you've accomplished. Perhaps their well-being might have been on your mind which gave you purpose but you yourself took on the challenge. It's your strength and perseverance that has brought you to where you are now. That's who you are and to where you belong."

"I don't—" She shook her head vehemently a few times before averting her gaze. "What you're telling me is hard to grasp."

 _Blind man._

The world as it was to him would be hard to explain when she never experienced it. It wasn't impossible, though, but first he needed to assure himself that this wouldn't be time wasted.

"Do you wish to understand?"

"You say this will help?" she asked instead.

Kouen nodded. "If you learn to understand it might lessen this burden of yours. It could even allow you to find a more plausible solution to what is to come when Sousei and Suisei find out."

That reminder dampened the small hope she had mustered but something else outweighed it as her blues eyes shone scared but determined. Perhaps this wouldn't be as much of a lost cause as he first thought.

"T-Then…I'll try even though…I don't like it."

 _She could very well be as selectively blind as she was mute._ But only time would answer that question. So long as she was willing, he would aid her.

A dry laugh caught his attention as he looked at Ceara wiping away at her face with the heels of her hands. "I don't understand how you remain so trusting of me. I lied about Murmur and who I was. Were it me, I'd be livid."

"I am." The abrupt halt of her hands told him that she was caught off guard by that. He wasn't going to lie to make her feel better, though. Pity wasn't something she would ever get from him. "But I came to know you for your actions. Names or titles hardly linger in my mind; actions speak much louder than words and that is what I base my decisions were others are concerned. Yours have spoken volumes. You took in a slave from Rakushou into your household, those under your command have been outspoken about your leadership, you rashly and selflessly care for those that can't help themselves, and you've shown you care for my siblings as you do yours; such actions have related to me how tenacious, hotheaded, candid, and passionate you are." He sighed, audibly, and closed his eyes briefly, "Frankly, you are an outlandish woman."

 _And a true memorable sight to witness._

Her chuckle this time wasn't dry but instead held the same lightness from before. Kouen could tell she was slowly regaining some confidence simply by the shine in her eyes or the sound of laughter.

"I think I heard a compliment somewhere in there," she jested, smiling.

"You're imaging things," he rectified.

"My apologies then." Unfurling from her little cocoon, Kouen moved slightly to the side not bothered as Ceara stretched her legs outward. Resting his arm against the windowpane, he brought one leg closer to himself to leave space for her. "I can more or less see what you meant to tell me. It's still puzzling but I want to understand."

One of her hands came undone from around her legs and rested against the windowpane close to his. Despite her eyes closing on their hands as she shortened the small gap between their fingers, his remained on the small woman before him.

Fragile as a brittle, beaten flower, her roots steadily freezing under the unforgiving cold of an endless winter, but strong enough to withstand it if given the smallest ray of sunshine. She was beaten, distraught, and about to give in. All she needed was a hand to stop her from falling over the edge. And help was something he could provide.

A voice at the back of his head incessantly asked him one question over and over though.

 _Why go so far for one person?_

He had no answer. Not until her fingers gently laid between his, just barely interlacing her small fingertips with his calloused ones. The touch was small and meek yet somewhat bold. He never cared before; everything had been out of obligation or merit and it still was. But even he could see the absurdity of his actions now.

Pardoning her would not come without cost.

 _And I shall carry that burden as she has hers._

If he would teach her, then he would teach through example. And to teach her this properly he would need to relearn who she was. This time he wouldn't be teaching Reizei Kohaku. This time Kouen would be teaching Ceara of Ériú.

"I..." Ceara lifted her gaze to meet his. In the faint moonlight that flooded through the window, her eyes gleamed as she gave him a small smile. "I don't want to run away anymore. It may not begin to describe my gratitude for the help your offering but for now it's all I can think of: thank you, En."

"You are helping yourself," he corrected but didn't undo the grasp of their fingers. "I am merely assisting you. This will be difficult but, I assure you, it is not impossible."

"Mm." Not sheepish in the least, she tilted her head to the side, "Do you mind if I stay here for a while?"

There was a small pause before he gave his answer. "I do not."

A smile spread evenly across her lips before she leaned in, her cheek resting upon her knees. "Thank you."

Kouen found himself tied to his sit as he himself laid back to rest in the peace and quiet that had developed after the long night. Like usual, her presence was calming and he found that the tension from the afternoon had lessened. A grand puzzle had just been solved for him and the result had been satisfactory. There were still a few pieces that didn't quite fit—that _other_ person who knew which he had an inkling of, the poisoning she had suffered, or what she knew about the magi name Yunan—but those were questions that could wait for another day.

After all, they still had the better part of a month to talk. And between preparing her for when the twins returned to tell them and dealing with how they would poise her status from now on, they would have plenty to talk about.

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _Still alive! Studying has hit like a truck with seven books I've got to finish before the end of June but I'm working on it. This chapter was supposed to longer but I decided to cut it short. So I had to compromise with about 32 pages._

 _Not much was planned for this part of the chapter so it didn't move the plot forward much. This was to clarify things from last chapter, give a proper backstory, and place a turning point for what's going to happen from this point onwards. It might have been a little too on the nose with how I put their relationship but I hoped you liked it. As always, if anything is confusing feel free to PM me._

 _Now is the time to thank the lovely people that have Favorited and Followed:  
\- __LunarOdyssey  
\- chasseurdereve  
\- serioushugsies  
\- Rena Talmay  
\- The Melon Lord. Toph_

 _Now I've got tons of things to do so I'll leave you lovely people with one last message. I appreciate every single one of you who favorite, follow, and review. You're the reason I keep writing and will always be. So give yourselves a pat on the back for being such a positive influence on my writing and work! My uploads after this might be a bit slower than usual but I'll keep working on it when I can. So for now I hope you enjoyed this chapter and stay tuned for the next update._


	10. The Reality of Nightmares

_**Chapter Ten**_

 _The Reality of Nightmares_

* * *

 _The darkness swallowed her whole, the night's embrace a frivolous companion for a little girl. The usual quiet occasionally disturbed by the noises of nature, crickets chirping their ballads to the moon or koi nipping at the surface of their ponds for a late meal. But even through their veil, her muffled sobbing still rung through the hallways of the empty palace._

 _Ceara sat nestled against the bark of one of the largest oaks in the gardens. The flora surrounding her birthed its beauty with moonlight bathing them making the petals that fell from nearby peach trees glimmer like tiny gems. But Ceara saw no such thing in the night, her heart too heavy with melancholy to care of the beauty encompassing her. Instead, she sought solace in the night; the palace was empty, everybody asleep, which gave her the chance to finally relieve the emotions that had wanted to claw their way out of her chest all day._

 _Kohaku's tenth birthday had been today and as such the Reizei family had celebrated. In spite of arriving at Rakushou only a few weeks after the fire at their estate, Kohaku's family did not want such tragic event to incur negativity in them. To appease the anxiety that the family had gained from the incident, they had adamantly proposed the celebration, small as it had been, and all through it Ceara had fought hard against the tears that wanted to escape and drown her._

 _They had celebrated what_ would _have been their daughter's—her friend's—tenth birthday._

 _At the thought resurfacing in her mind, Ceara couldn't hold onto the sob that escaped. Her small hand clamped down on her mouth at feeling it bubble, trying to suppress the cry uselessly while the other held tightly to her carnation hairpin. But she couldn't hold on forever; sobbing as gross as she had been, her nose was congested unabling her to breath through it. She had to open her mouth but every time she did another nasty sob escaped._

 _Apologies rang through her head as she wept and shrunk deeper into herself, holding even tighter onto the hairpin. Murmur's gentle voice echoed through her mind wanting to sooth her._

" _Breathe, little one," he said passively. "You must or else you will suffocate."_

 _It felt like she already was. Breathing was hard, her heart hammered painfully against her ribcage, and her head ached. Everything hurt and she was tired of the pain. Regardless of that, though, she still couldn't bring herself to tell the truth. Her voice had returned to her a week after the incident but she had yet to say anything. She played along liking the warmth and love they gave her. It made her happy but at night when she was all by herself was when the full weight of everything would hit her._

 _It wasn't real._

 _They didn't love her._

 _Everyone who did died._

 _It was why Kohaku had died._

 _The tears choked her again causing a guttural snort. Her hand came over her mouth and nose wanting the noises to stop but the urge to cry was too much._

" _Kohaku?"_

 _She turned at hearing the deep voice that called, not necessarily because of the name that it had called but more because it had startled her. Ceara's breath hitched as her head snapped up and fear clutched her heart to a dead stop—it was Ren Hakuyuu._

" _P-P-Prin—" Her voice failed her overtaken as she was by her crying. Scrambling to her feet, Ceara staggered back and held onto her hairpin tighter than ever and closer to her racing heart._

 _Hakuyuu's brow knitted together in concern as he looked down at her, making his way to her. Ceara didn't want him close when she was like this. Not when she wouldn't be able to hold herself together for much longer._

" _P-P-Ple—ase!" she hiccuped, shaking her head furiously back and forth. "S-Stay—aw-w-way!"_

" _Koha—"_

" _Please!" she cried. Her emotions and desire to be protected triggered Murmur, the eight-pointed star shining on the hairpin as his power surged through the gardens. The small magic that she casted rounded what little rukh remained from perished beings and managed to gather enough to create a stout soldier that sprouted from the ground in a mist of white._

 _The First Prince jumped back startled but not losing his concentration as he kept his bright eyes on her. Panic engulfed her at seeing the soldier, flashbacks running through her mind in a crazed frenzy. The memories still fresh, she cried and staggered back until she fell to a sit afraid of it all happening again._

 _No, she prayed in her head, please not again._

" _It's all right." Hakuyuu's voice came softly to her ears and she blinked her tears away to see him. He stood undeterred despite the soldier that stood firmly between them blocking his path. One hand was raised at the wraith as if to keep it at bay while his eyes fleeted from it to her. There was no fear in his blue eyes, only concern. "I didn't mean to scare you." His eyes came to the eight-pointed star that still shone on Murmur's Metal Vessel. "Let's calm down," he proposed, stepping closer as Ceara's sobbing began to decline. Their eyes locked for a second before his sight went to the wraith and back to her. "Will you call it off?"_

 _The thought of having no control struck her and brought fear back to her. "I can't," she wept. The soldier reacted, lowering its spear and aiming it at Hakuyuu. The young prince didn't flinch and instead stopped in his tracks, locking his eyes with her completely._

" _No, don't be scared," he spoke softly, his gaze turning gentle as a warm smile tugged at his lips. "It's okay. Just calm down. Are you scared of me?" Ceara thought about it for a second but his gentle eyes calmed her, her grip on Murmur lessening somewhat. Not trusting her voice, she shook her head. "All right. That's good. Are you scared of hurting me?" The idea made her want to cry, her eyes glazing over. The soldier took a strained stance, its hold on its spear tightening but shaking. Hakuyuu caught this for a brief second. "Don't be. You won't hurt me."_

" _I c—an't control it," she wept._

" _Yes, you can," he assured her. "Trust yourself. Ask it to leave."_

 _Ceara's eyes wandered up to the soldier, taut yet shaky in its position. It hadn't worked before during the incident. They had killed and killed and nothing she said or did stopped them._

" _They react to your emotional state, little king," Murmur told her. "The young prince is correct. If you request it of them, they will abide, but you must be calm."_

 _She didn't want to kill anymore. She didn't want to break her promise again._

 _Her sobbing was still there even with the few deep breaths she took but she was more relaxed by taking them. "P-Please," she stuttered weakly. "Go. I'm—I'm okay."_

 _The soldier remained standing and fear threatened to clutch at Ceara being unable to call the specter back. Repeating Hakuyuu's and Murmur's words, she pleaded in her mind holding her Metal Vessel. A couple of sharp but long breaths was what it took to calm herself down enough to be certain of her position. "Go." Her voice trembled but didn't lose conviction. All she wanted was for it to leave._

 _Finally, the soldier faltered and retracted its spear to stand still for a second before sinking into the ground into a pool of white fog that vanished with it. Tears stung at the corners of her eyes as she gawked at the empty space between them, incredulous. Letting out the breath she had unknowingly been holding, Ceara couldn't hold her tears back anymore. She was too tired and too afraid. Ren Hakuyuu had seen her use Murmur, after all, and she was sure the First Prince would be anything but lenient with a murderer like her._

 _The thought itself made her cry all the more._

 _A warm hand came to her shoulder and she recoiled back holding Murmur like the lifeline he was, but at lifting her gaze, she met his gentle eyes and warm smile. The sight baffled her._

" _You—" Ceara flinched at how he said that. You—it sounded so...foreign. A shadow came over his eyes that tinted their gentleness. "Have a Metal Vessel, a djinn. You're a dungeon capturer." It wasn't an accusation, just a mere reaffirmation. The shadow left his eyes and Ceara saw the full weight of realization hit him. "Who are you?"_

Who am I?

 _For weeks no one had dared ask that question, they all assumed. Despite them knowing, even if a little, about Kohaku's vassal, her little doppelganger, none had asked for reassurance. They had no reason too._

 _But Hakuyuu did the moment she used Murmur. Only one other in the whole of the Kou Empire was a known dungeon capturer: the first son of the Emperor's younger brother. Murmur, the one friend she had left, inevitably gave her away._

 _Ceara's lips trembled, her sobs threatening to overcome yet again. Hakuyuu came closer and knelt before her to place his hand over hers as they clamped onto the hairpin, the sheer force turning her knuckles white._

 _The heat coming from his body as he towered over her even as he knelt sent a shiver down her spine. Hakuyuu glanced down at her Metal Vessel, a grimace coming to his lips, as he wrapped his hands over hers._

" _You're...Cael's sister." The mere mention of her brother's name made her tears pour over in silence, and the pitiable gaze he returned to her left her wide-eyed. "Ceara."_

 _No. She shook her head vehemently in her feeble attempt to dispel the truth but his hold on her hands and Murmur's words broke her already weak resolve._

" _It is all right, little one. Tell the truth," her djinn said soothingly. "No matter what may come I will be with you, of that you can be sure."_

 _His loyalty and support along with Hakuyuu's caring gaze tore her completely and, unable to control herself, Ceara threw herself at Hakuyuu to hold him as she cried once more, pleading for forgiveness and weeping her apologies. The prince, caught off guard as he was, only held her, stroking her head as he would any of his upset younger siblings._

" _There, there," he cooed as she wept onto his shoulder, Murmur's hairpin digging into his shoulder. "It's—" He caught himself and stopped. Ceara knew what would usually follow that sentence; she had heard it countless of times when Cael passed away._

 _It's going to be all right._

 _You'll be fine_

 _It'll get better._

 _But it didn't. And after Kohaku, she doubted it ever would. The thought only deepened the hole she already felt in her chest. Wanting the security and comfort, she held on tighter not caring where Hakuyuu was taking her to now. By the time she had spent herself in tears she managed to gather her surroundings. As she sat in the middle of a plush bed, Ceara noted the huge room, spacey, and too decorated to be hers._

 _It was his._

 _She hiccuped and tried to speak through them. "W-Why—?"_

" _You seemed overwhelmed. Talking helps, I've found, but I need you to calm down first for us to talk."_

 _Ceara shook her head. "N-Nothing to t-_ ugh _...talk about."_

" _Don't, Ceara." She flinched at hearing her name. "I heard about you from your brother in passing conversations. May I call you Ceara?"_

" _That's not m-m-my name anymore," she stammered as she held back a croak. "I'm...K-Kohaku. S-So plea—se, don't t-tell any—body."_

 _Hakuyuu's lips tightened to a grim line as he sat before her, his weight on the mattress making her small body sink closer to him. He reached out to pat her head but in fear she recoiled, trembling. Hakuyuu hesitated for a second before soothingly stroking her head and making her lift her head as she sniffled tears away, her stark blue eyes red and puffy._

" _If I promise not to tell, can you tell me how this came to happen? Why Kohaku isn't here and why you have a djinn?"_

 _With a heavy heart and dry throat, Ceara nodded unable to do much else. Afraid as she was, she also wanted for someone to know. This burden was too heavy for her alone, she figured that out the hard way, and it crushed her under its weight. If she wanted this to work, she couldn't break like this again._

 _But by telling him the truth she could be risking everything all the same. A part of her assured her though that she needn't worry, not with him. Hakuyuu reminded her a lot of Cael; they both seemed caring, strong, and understanding. If anything, she felt compelled to tell him and after a few more minutes of quiet hiccups and calm breathing, Ceara told him everything. He never once stopped her and merely rubbed her back when she felt like she would cry again. It shocked her how much she had cried but it didn't drag her story much. She finished well into early morning just as the dark night was beginning to change hue with the coming sunrise._

 _Ceara rubbed her tired eyes, her tears long having dried, and looked up at Hakuyuu. Pleas wanted to come out but she held her tongue quickly as the prince took a deep breath. He paused for a moment before sighing._

" _You're alone?"_

 _The moment she began to nod she stopped herself and held tightly to her hairpin. "I have Murmur."_

 _Hakuyuu's hand came over hers to grip her hold. "But where everything else is concerned…?"_

 _Ceara didn't want to answer the obvious and instead shrank into herself. "It's okay."_

" _It's not," he refuted with a heavy sigh. Ceara rubbed her eyes again as she watched him lean back and the sunrays began to sip in through the open windows. It was a hot morning. "This can't go on any further."_

" _No, please!" she exclaimed, jumping from her sit to him. "You can't tell anybody else!"_

" _I didn't mean it like that." His reply shocked Ceara as she sat back down and waited for him to continue. "If what you say is true—"_

" _It is," she protested angry._

" _Then you won't bear this much longer by yourself," he finished, not minding her interruption. He gave her a smile that reached his eyes and Ceara could only stare wide-eyed at the sincerity that accompanied his words. "Let me help you."_

" _Help...me?"_

 _Hakuyuu nodded and took her tiny hands in his with Murmur laying in her left palm. "You mustn't hide this. It is too cruel to keep their daughter's death from Koujiro and Arianna. Most of all, it is harsh on you to keep this facade."_

" _B-But I can't—I'm scared," she confessed._

 _A lopsided smile came to him at hearing this. "It's understandable but you don't have to be. Things aren't good but there's no reason for them to become worse. Let's work together and find a solution to this, all right?"_

 _It didn't make sense. By all accounts, Ceara's mind knew that he was too optimistic about the whole thing. But a good part of her wanted to believe him and his words._

 _This could be solved. It wouldn't be better but they could try to not make it worse._

 _Ceara sniffled a bit before nodding. "O-Okay." Hakuyuu offered her a genuine smile and held tightly to her hands._

 _Too tightly._

 _Irrational fear crept up her spine sending alarms through her head. Instinctively, she tried pulling away but his hold was too strong. "Y-You're hurting me." Her eyes fell to their hands but at seeing them, Ceara gasped in horror._

 _His hands, they were melting away like wax and oozing through her fingers, trapping them in place. The fear tripled making her blood rush through her veins. Looking up, her eyes widened at seeing Hakuyuu's face beginning to melt as well as the whole scenario around her changed in the blink of an eye._

 _The room wasn't empty anymore. Countless of faceless shadows stood around them as a fury of flames spewed from the recesses of the place consuming the room in seconds. Fear and panic set quicker than ever as she hurried but failed to take her hands away from the melting corpse. The wax fell slowly shifting his once gentle smile into a macabre grimace; curiously, she could still hear his voice—a horrid mixture of tones—as the blaze began to lick at the bed's wood posts, the curtains of the canopy catching on fire in an instant._

" _ **But things**_ **have** _ **gotten worse, haven't they?"**_

" _Stop!" she cried, feeling the burn on her legs and crying out. The only place untouched by the flames was Hakuyuu's remnants but she refused to go near him, preferring the slow excruciating burn to being near him—it. She tugged harder, pleading with him to let go and with Murmur to act but neither listened. "Let go of me!"_

 _He didn't and instead he kept talking._ _ **"And now the world will know the truth. Sousei and Suisei will hate you, the people will crucify you, and all will cry for retribution."**_ _His hold tightened even more and Ceara cried out as his scalding touch corroded through her flesh, blistering and burning it as tears sprung anew this time from pain._ _ **"You will pay for your sin with death."**_

" _No!" she shouted at the top of her lungs. "Kouen said he'd help! I believe he will!"_

" _ **Like Hakuyuu tried to?"**_ _The wax phantom cackled, the sound irritating to her sensitive ears._ _ **"You saw were that ended and you know that the same will befall Kouen for trying to help you. When will you learn? Those you love or that love you will die. Just end it, Speirr. Don't waste anymore lives on your wretched existence."**_

" _He won't die!" she cried out with all her might despite the pain that scorched every part of her, inside and out. "I won't let it happen!"_

" _ **Then you're the biggest fool of them all. You will die just like before: scared, betrayed, and alone. None will save you from the penance you have to pay, Caritas. Not**_ _her_ _ **nor Entei. No one will."**_

* * *

Her lungs hurt at the sharp gasp she took the moment Ceara opened her eyes. Petrified, she sprung upward and wrapped her arms around herself trying to extinguish the makeshift fire that still scalded her cold and clammy skin. Her eyes fleeted through the room searching for Hakuyuu, the wax corpse, or the blaze that had consumed the room but at finding none of them she found herself sinking to a sit.

A dream.

 _A nightmare._

Grabbing at her head, she tried remembering but all she felt was the cold sweat that ran all over her body. Despite how cold she felt, she could still remember the fire licking against her skin, the wax's tight hold on her hands, Murmur not answering.

Murmur.

In a hurry, she reached under her pillow and sighed as she took out all three of her vessels intact. Their worried voices flooded her mind and brought a slow calm to her racing mind. The dream that had started as a bittersweet memory had broken apart to an unbelievable horror of her own mind.

Sad to say though that this wasn't the first time. For the past few days since their return from Magnoshustadt, dreamless nights had been fitful and dreams had turned to nightmarish guilt trips of her own making. Either one resulted in sleepless nights that quickly began to take their toll. Five days into this insufferable routine she was already exhausted beyond belief and her days had been thrown awry as a result. During the day she found solace in the small naps she could find at the price of neglecting duties she otherwise would never skip; at night, her dreams negated her sleep and she found it better to just not sleep at all.

This was tearing her apart slowly but very effectively.

" _You cannot continue like this,"_ Beleth said. Ceara paid little attention as she sat back against the far wall that hugged one side of her bed. _"You must rest."_

"I can't," she deadpanned, her tone rising in irritation. "It's useless. Maybe it's right and it's better if I just—"

" _Don't even dare finish that idiotic sentence!"_ Marbas blurted out, her voice cracking.

Ceara scoffed, a crooked grin coming at their protectiveness. "What's the use in faking this shit anymore," she admitted. "If they won't kill me, sleep deprivation and guilt surely will."

" _They haven't before,"_ Murmur said, much calmer than the other two. _"What have you done before when this happened?"_

When she couldn't sleep from the nightmares was back when the Reizei had spent the better part of a year in the Imperial Palace at Rakushou. They kept her up just like they did now. What _did_ she do back then?

"I walked," she whispered to the emptiness of her lackluster room. Despite being a good size and not lacking in much commodity-wise, she could still feel the emptiness that dragged the room to the ground. It trapped her, held her down. Freedom had been a hallmark of her childhood and feeling that freedom, even if imaginary, helped at times to clear her mind of nihilistic thoughts that came. "Anywhere I could and as far as my feet could take me."

" _Then go,"_ Murmur replied.

 _Yeah, it sounds nice._

Her rationale quickly stepped in to intervene. "The guards." She had forgotten about them completely. Two stood outside her door in shifts. Despite their talk a few days ago, Kouen did not trust her fully yet and the detail at her back said as much. The ones that followed her during the day had been noticeably absent, however, but she guessed that Seijin sufficed. Ceara wasn't as blind as Kouen took her for; she knew that Seijin was sending him information about her. Whether it was good or bad, she couldn't possibly know, but surely the young boy gave enough to Kouen to put him at ease during the day.

The obstacle still stood just a few feet outside her door, though.

Beleth chuckled in his throat. _"That is easily dealt with, my king."_

Knocking them out with sound magic would be good but a little too conspicuous. Then again, they wouldn't remember and think they had fallen asleep. Deciding on that, Ceara took a shawl for the mildly cool night before coming closer to the door. Her ears heard them just on the other side, shuffling in their boots as they worked to remain awake for their shift. Tired already? Good, it'd make Beleth's job easier. Taking her pen by the feathered-end, she tapped the metal against a nearby metal lamp. The sound reverberated through the air and came to her ears but she knew that the sound was low enough for anyone aside from herself to hear. Waiting a few seconds was all it took before she heard two loud thuds coming from outside.

"Thank you, Bele," she said before opening the door and treading outside. Like she thought, the guards were out cold and sprawled on the floor. _Not good._ It'd be too obvious that she used her djinn to go out. An idea quickly came and using Marbas' strength to pick them up, she propped them well against their weapons or nearby wooden posts. "Good enough," she muttered before wrapping the shawl closer to herself and walking away.

The palace in Balbadd was still pretty much foreign land to her. The only place she knew by heart was Kouen's private study and the dining room but other than that the hallways were unfamiliar and the dark of the night didn't help. The shadows that danced against the light of the torches spread about creating shadows too reminiscent of the ones from her dreams. The fear drove her out from the hallways and to one of the larger gardens of the estate. There the moonlight shone brightly and allowed no such shadow people to terrorize her.

Then again, it hadn't been just them. Finding a good spot under a distinct floral tree, she glanced up at the species that had to be indigenous to Balbadd. The flowers budding were a creamy white with veins spreading through of a blue color. Their scent was mild but sweet like lavender and helped calm her. As she sat down with her back against the trunk of the tree, she felt the breeze that passed by. Ceara held onto strands of her hair as the breeze blew, taking with it petals of white and blue that fell on the surface of the pond that stood some feet away. The petals touched the water surface creating ripples and playing with the moon's reflection.

Fresh air. Cool breeze. Sweet flowers. And the soft beating of wings.

Even in the quiet veil of night, her ears could hear the soft drum of the rukh's wings as they hovered about the place. Their presence calmed her more than anything despite being unable to perceive or touch them. She heard them, though, and as far as Ceara was concerned that was enough.

 _At least_ _ **you**_ _haven't abandoned me._

Neither them nor her djinn ever had. It was nice knowing that even when the world attacked her relentlessly there was still a part of it that stood by her side. No matter how broken she might be.

Her head heavy and eyelids drooping, Ceara shook her head and the sleepiness away determined to remain awake. Glancing back at the pond she figured it would be enough to keep her up. Stripping her feet of her shoes, she scooted closer to the water and dipped her feet in faster than she could think while holding the skirts of her nightgown away from her legs.

The freezing water sent shivers up her body creating goose flesh across her exposed legs. It woke up her all right and leaving them there seemed better than exposing them back to the cool night air.

 _I'll deal with that when I pull them out._

But as her body accustomed to the temperature, her mind began to wander. A month was all she had left to prepare herself before the twins arrived from the Tenzen Plateau. In a short month she would have to understand this 'backwards thinking' that Kouen had described she was so adamant in holding onto. Ceara was glad that despite the estrangement, Kouen was still willing to help her. It amazed and perplexed he, but she appreciated the thought deeply all the same.

It baffled her how he could be so understanding. But perhaps 'understanding' wasn't enough to explain what his help meant to her. Kouen understood and beyond that attempted to clarify things for her. He saw the error of her ways—something she clearly saw as well but in a completely different light than him—and went a step further to try and explain them.

Kouen's words had given her the hope that perhaps not all was lost. That perhaps some things were still salvageable among this wreckage that had become her live. A part of her even wanted to believe that he saw her as redeemable.

 _And I want to see what is it he sees worth saving._

"Anegimi."

Turning at the faint voice that called her, Ceara locked gazes with Kougyoku's magenta eyes. The young girl was dressed in night clothes with a shawl draped around her shoulders, her long red hair falling down her back, and her eyes staring at Ceara. Almost immediately, Ceara rushed to stand, taking her feet out from the pond and letting her skirts fall before bowing.

"I apologize," Ceara said, head bowed low. "I did not mean to startle you, princess. Excuse my rudeness." Intent on leaving, she spun on her heels ready to sprint back to her room but before she could even take a step away, Kougyoku's dainty hands wrapped around one of her wrists stopping Ceara in her tracks.

"W-Why are you being like this?" Kougyoku mumbled.

Ceara didn't want to answer. Even five days after Magnostadt, she had only been in constant contact with a handful of people: the twins, Seijin, and Kouen. The ban notwithstanding, Ceara knew that those who'd witnessed what happened in the battlefield that day could infer enough from what they had seen. Koumei and Hakuei already showed their distance; despite his help, Kouen had reverted back to some semblance of aloofness as well.

Kougyoku shouldn't be any different. As such Ceara should show her the respect she deserved as the Eighth Princess of the Kou Empire. But the question the young princess threw her way made that resolve waver. It would be almost a year now that they had befriended one another and she had enjoyed that. It felt good to have friends, something she hadn't wanted since Kohaku. Something that eluded her ever since.

With Kougyoku, Kouha, Seijin, Koumei, Hakuei, and even Hakuryuu, she had that. They were all different and in spite of her odd approaches, they saw it fit to befriend her. And those friendships grew by themselves into different experiences that were now toppled and destroyed by her own hand.

"Answer me, please." Kougyoku's plea tore at her chest. "Why have you not spoken to me?"

"Kouen forbids it," Ceara replied going for the safest answer. "I'm not trustworthy to be around anymore. Not after what's been found."

"What?" Kougyoku cried and turned up to frown at Ceara as she glanced over her shoulder to stare at the young princess. "That you're not really who you say you are? So what?"

"What do you mean 'so what'?" Ceara asked, turning fully to face her as the grip on her wrist remained. "Kougyoku, do you really not understand how bad I've deceived you all? The lie I've told and what it implies?"

"Yes, I do," she replied as her cheeks flushed red in anger and annoyance. "You're not Kohaku. You're not Masami-san's, Sou's, or Sui's real sister. But that doesn't matter."

A sigh escaped her at what Kougyoku understood and what by default she failed to see. The girl only had half the story and that would be pretty much the extent of everybody else's knowledge with the exception of Kouen. They would know that she's not Reizei Kohaku, not that she killed the young girl when they were children.

"You know why?" Kougyoku cried, her eyes shining in the moonlight. "Because you are no different from Kouha and I."

"Kouha and you?" she repeated, puzzled.

"Exactly," Kougyoku continued with a strong yet quivering voice. "Kouha and I...we're related to Kouen onii-sama and Koumei onii-sama by our father but the relationship we have with them now is nothing compared to what they have to one another. I could never get along with my other sisters, either. We were family but we were never united, and what I have now with my older brothers took much longer to be than I would have wished. But you—" she sniffled audibly and raised one hand to wipe messily at her face. "You and Sousei and Suisei aren't like that. Even if they don't know who you are, you loved them all the same. You never let that love falter. I've been envious of that ever since you returned but now—I...I'm angry that you're throwing that away so easily after what's happened."

"Throwing it away?" Ceara shook her head vehemently and closed the gap between them to lift Kougyoku's face with her hands. "No, Kougyoku, I would never do that. I love them just as much as I love you and Kouha and Hakuryuu and every one of your brothers."

"Then why haven't you talked to us!" she cried out in anger, her voice raising and making Ceara flinch as the high pitch reached her delicate ears. "Why haven't you talked to _them_!? They should know—they deserve to know the truth!"

"I can't, Kougyoku!" the shouted surprising both of them and making the young princess flinch. The resolve from before completely shattered at the truth that Kougyoku had shouted. One she didn't want to accept. Ceara stopped herself and took a short breath to calm her own annoyance before saying what really bothered her. "I'm scared of them, of what they'll think, of what they'll say."

 _Of what they will inevitably do._

Kougyoku's magenta eyes widened at hearing this, her lips falling slightly agape. Her flushed cheeks made her pale skin bright in the moonlight and the glaze over her eyes made Ceara want to kick herself. This wasn't what she wanted; she never wanted to hurt anybody.

"I'm sorry," Ceara apologized genuinely, letting go of Kougyoku's face. "I shouldn't have yelled—"

"Kouen onii-sama told me that it's okay to be afraid." Kougyoku's words brought Ceara's attention back to the young princess as her eyes wandered to her own hands as one still held onto her wrist. "Back when I was to leave to capture Vinea, I was scared out of my mind. I had trained and perfected my swordplay for years but I was still afraid. When I told him this, he...he said that it was natural for me to feel fear. But that I shouldn't let it stop me, that I should use that and press forward because, in the end, the only one causing that fear and holding me back is myself." Her eyes came back up and Ceara was baffled to see something in them—a glint she recognized having seen in her brothers. A light of strength, determination, and fierceness, and it was staring her dead in the eye. "All this that you're scared of...it's okay to be scared of it. I'm still scared about a lot of things too, and maybe they're not as bad as what you're going through now but you shouldn't let them hold you back either. The anegimi I know would never back down or run away. She would never stop just because she's scared. She would keep going to protect what she loves."

"All you knew about me was a lie, Kougyoku," Ceara deadpanned not wanting her to keep deluding herself.

The young princess was undaunted and shook her head. "No, I'm saying this from what I've seen of you. I remember little of when we were younger when we first met but I remember this past year clearly and nothing you have done has proven my beliefs wrong. K-Kohaku or not, whichever you are, you're still anegimi to me. The person I look up to like I do my brothers. I'm proud to call you my friend and as such I have a duty to you."

"Duty?"

Kougyoku smiled, her flushed cheeks giving her a childish appearance without the glint in her eyes disappearing. "To listen if you want to talk. If you're too scared to tell them, practice telling me. Practice until it isn't scary anymore. Until you feel okay telling them. And if there's anything else I can do just say the word."

Ceara gave her a crooked smile and shook her head slowly in disbelief. "You're too nice, Kougyoku. You shouldn't offer such things to a nobody like me."

"You're not nobody," Kougyoku replied with fervor. "Anegi—" The young princess stopped for a moment before her smile widened, "Ceara, you're my friend and nothing will change that."

A ball of anxiety and guilt threatened to explode in Ceara's stomach wanting for her to cry but she held them back and smiled instead. This girl…

 _You're much stronger than I am, Kougyoku. Of that there's no question._

She couldn't deny her this. Not when it made her equally as happy to know that where most everybody else had spurned her, this little princess held her ground and beliefs. Not even war, the world, or others would change her and Ceara was glad to have her as a friend.

Prying her hand from her wrist, Ceara held Kougyoku's hands in her own and held them tightly as she gave the younger girl a smile, one that reached her eyes and heart. "Thank you, Kougyoku...and I'm sorry."

Kougyoku's smile broaden and she shook her head. "It's all right."

"No, you're right. There's no question about that. But I still need time," Ceara admitted. "This has been hard for me and it's not something I can say easily but I have to try. I do want them to know the truth. You, too. I just...want to understand why I'm afraid first."

"Yes, of course," Kougyoku nodded. "I'm sure if it's you, you'll surely figure it out, anegimi. And rest assured that I'm here to help you any way that I can."

Ceara chuckled at Kougyoku's blind faith but it also touched her. With a nod, she accepted the offer, saying that she would come to her if she needed help. "And I'll be sure to come tell you, too, Kougyoku. Sousei and Suisei aren't the only ones that deserve the truth."

The young princess nodded eagerly but yawned quickly after. Ceara minded the time then and noted that the dark sky wasn't so dark anymore. Dawn was coming in a few hours but strangely she didn't feel that tired anymore. She offered to accompany Kougyoku back to her room and the princess accepted. In a few minutes, the two stood before the closed doors of the princess's room. Its owner turned to face Ceara as they readied to part ways then.

"Be strong, anegimi," Kougyoku whispered with a smile. "I'm sure together anything's possible."

Her optimism brought some into Ceara's bleak mind reigning some of her fear from the night in. She nodded and opened the door for her but at doing so a body stumbled out to fall onto the wooden floor between them. And strangely enough, Ceara could swear she'd seem him somewhere before.

"Ka Koubun?"

 _Oh, right. Her vassal._

"P-P-Princess!" Ka Koubun shrieked in concern. Ceara noted him fully dressed and found it strange until the sun began to peak over the horizon. Surely, Kougyoku would wake up this early to prepare for the day which would explain his presence in her waiting room and his anxiousness. "W-Where have you been? When I came to wake you for the day you were gone!" His eyes finally landed on Ceara as if he had barely noticed her and screeched, "Y-You!"

"Don't be rude, Ka Koubun," Kougyoku chastised.

"But princess," he hissed as if that would keep his words from being telligible to Ceara. "His highness forbade you and the rest of your siblings from interacting any further with the general. You mustn't disobey."

"Kouen onii-sama would understand," Kougyoku assured Ka Koubun as she lifted her chin. "Besides, anegimi would never harm me."

"She's right," Ceara said pointedly.

"Even so," Ka Koubun began but was promptly overridden by Kougyoku turning to Ceara.

"Would you accompany me for dinner this evening, anegimi?"

"Dinner?"

"Princess!" Ka Koubun called out. "This evening you cannot. You have a previous appointment with the war council and his highness."

This made Ceara raise an eyebrow in confusion. A princess meeting with her brother was normal but also with the war council? Kougyoku acknowledged this with a gasp as if she had forgotten and at this, Ceara just had to ask. "War council?"

Pride filled Kougyoku to the brim as she smiled. "Yes. Kouen onii-sama said that after what happened in Magnostadt that I have what it takes to become a general in Kou's army."

Ceara couldn't help the grin that came to her lips. "Congratulations. Never doubted you would for a second."

The princess's cheeks brightened as she flustered and smiled meekly. "Yes, so maybe dinner tonight won't be as possible as I first thought."

"Later then." Kougyoku turned to stare at Ceara at what she had said. Ignoring the shocked expression from both, Ceara gave her a smile before clarifying. "We can have dinner some other time and celebrate your new position."

Kougyoku reciprocated the smile and nodded before leaving her and following Ka Koubun inside of her room. Finding it necessary to return since morning meant that the servants and her guards' next shift would soon come to her room, Ceara made her way back. Despite her calculations before, she found a group of servants and guards quarreling before her door. Interestingly enough, they were bickering about someone's incompetence and whatnot, surely from the guards that let her slip for the night.

 _Not their fault, really._

Feeling pity for the guards that she had knocked out, she didn't bother hiding herself or sneaking into her room and instead stepped into the full view of the group gathered there. All eyes turned to her and she gave them a small grin before spreading her arms out to welcome them.

"Sorry about that," she said with a shrug of her shoulders. "But night gets pretty boring when you can't sleep." Making her way through to the door, she opened it and glanced at the handmaidens that had been appointed to watch over her. She didn't mind them, but much like the guards, she thought they were a little too much when Seijin was more than enough. Nonetheless, she humored them and gave a slight nod towards her room. "Let's start the day early, shall we? I might actually try to do some work today."

The handmaidens blinked at each other before turning to her baffled. Ceara scoffed at their shock but ignored it and entered her room, hearing their small footsteps as they followed behind her.

Ceara knew working would be hard and time consuming but it would calm her. And truth be told, she needed it since Kouen had asked to speak again soon. No doubt to further their discussion from the other day. There was still no set time but she knew that he wouldn't let her dawdle much. It'd be hard but she felt more determined than ever to go through with it.

She hadn't lied to Kougyoku, after all. Ceara knew why she was afraid, Kouen had made it clear to her that the twins being fine without her—being able to leave her behind—was what she was scared of. Now more than anything, though, she wanted— _needed_ —to understand why.

* * *

As the end of the week approached and no concrete date had been set yet for them to speak again, Ceara began to worry. This was unlike Kouen; she knew how punctuality was a big peeve of his from experience. But no matter how much she wanted to find out what was keeping him, the reinforcements of guards that had grown after that one night escapade kept her from deviating from her schedule.

The one time she had managed to lose them and whisk away she had been found by Ri Seishuu on her way to Kouen's private study. At least getting caught by one of his Household Members allowed her some answers.

"The young master has been tied up as of late with preparing for the Summit meeting," he had said as he accompanied her back to her quarters. "Both princes have been pent up in the study and ordered to not let anybody interrupt."

Summit meeting; Ceara remembered hearing about that from Seijin. A meeting between Sindria and the Kou Empire, a meeting between King Sinbad and the First Prince Ren Kouen to discuss the story of the young magi, Aladdin—at least that's what she could conclude from the pieces Seijin told her and what she herself had overheard. The palace and its many servants were bolstering with a seemingly infinite amount of tasks in preparations and she saw how it affected the poor guards and handmaidens that had been assigned to watch over her.

Ceara could overhear their hushed voices as they talked from across her room as she sat at the table in her waiting room working on what she could. The orphanages at the several cities that she had established still needed work and funds, and she knew that those soldiers' letters wouldn't sort themselves. In spite of this, she couldn't take her mind away from the gossip that she heard coming from the servants.

"She betrayed the empire."

"His highness would not have allowed her to live if she had, idiot."

"She's a dungeon capturer like they are, though. Wouldn't that warrant a pardon at least until the war is over?"

"Then what good will we do guarding her when she can easily kill us?"

"Prince Kouen must surely know if he assigned us. We're not alone either; Master Seishuu certainly helps."

"They're right. If she were really any threat, we certainly wouldn't be here."

"But why are we here then?"

To watch her. Ceara knew that all of the Imperial Family saw her in a suspicious light now and keeping an eye on her wasn't something they could waste time on. Certainly not now.

The whispers ended abruptly seconds before the sound of her door opening made her turn up. From the threshold, Seijin walked into the room with piles of scrolls in his arms that he settled onto her desk without much preamble.

"And these?" she asked, taking one of the scrolls and unfurling it.

"The accounts from the past few months," Seijin pointed out while he neatly separated them into piles. With a motion of his hand, he continued to explain. "There's been inconsistencies."

That didn't sound good. "Of what kind?"

"Financial," Seijin began with a heavy sigh. "With the one you have planned for Balbadd, it's four orphan houses in total. Your encumbering yourself with over a quarter of a million huang. At this rate, I won't be able to situate the funds properly to them. At least not without affecting either one or all."

She parted her attention between Seijin and the scroll that she had unfurled to read. It accounted for the house that she had planned to start in Balbadd, but as Seijin had said, the numbers weren't adding up. Wanting to get to the bottom of it, she asked for his help to look for some answer as they looked through the scrolls.

 _Get from here? No, that would incur debts. Cutting here would lower their portions and maintenance. And there's no way I am cutting off their education._

Every and anyway she saw it, the numbers didn't fit. Even with the funds of her work and family inheritance, they weren't enough to substantiate the heavy costs of all four equally.

Balling her fists against her temple, she felt her head pounding at the problem at hand. _Think, Ceara, think._

 _There has to be a way._

"Miss Kohaku?" Ceara turned up at hearing Seijin and watched as the boy balanced himself on the balls of his feet. Hesitant at first, he incurred enough courage to raise his voice and ask, "If I may...I don't think establishing another house is best."

The comment made Ceara's brow furrow. Not many knew about her projects—she purposefully kept them anonymous from the government after all—from the moment Seijin had found out about this and the memoir for the soldiers, he had been on board with the idea. This came completely out of nowhere for her. "How so?"

He pursed his lips before replying, "With all due respect, you are not in the best position to be rushing these projects like before."

 _Not in the best position..._

"You've heard the rumors." It wasn't so much a question as it was statement. The kid was too fidgety and it showed just how much he had heard. "Do you believe them?"

"Of course not!" His outburst surprised Ceara somewhat but she kept a cool head wanting to hear what he had to say. Luckily, once undone, Seijin didn't seem to be holding back much anymore. "B-But it is infuriating how they can so easily turn on you without knowing the truth!"

"And what would that be according to you, Seijin?"

At being put on such spot, Seijin's cheek flushed red in embarrassment but despite this, he continued with the same fervor from before. "I don't know, honestly. But I do know that someone as kind as you would never betray the very people she's working so hard to protect and safeguard."

His words tugged at her but Ceara didn't let it show beyond a smile for a few seconds. "But they've incurred enough doubt in you to ask me to stop."

"No, never!" he rectified, clearing his throat when he noticed he had just shouted that. "Miss Kohaku, I would never doubt you, but with the rumors that are spreading, those same people and soldiers you're trying to help might not be as understanding. With what they hear, there's no telling what their minds will come up with; what's worse, there's no telling what they might be convinced into thinking."

The boy was smart, she had to give him that. At twelve, he was certainly sharper than she had ever been at that age. When correctly persuaded and with lies sprinkled with just enough truth, people could be tricked into thinking anything. Ceara could certainly attest to that much.

"What do you suggest then?" she asked putting the scroll down to give him her full attention.

"Lay the plans for Balbadd's house to rest, at least until what is going on can be cleared," he answered. "Money aside, without the support of the people you cannot hope to accomplish something they won't support you in."

He wasn't wrong. The reason she had done so much in the few years after she had started was because she had the people's help. With the memoirs, soldiers and their families gave their accounts out of their own volitions. With the orphan houses, it was the widows or young women that felt inclined to help with the children's care. Because of them, her job had been simple: she provided the resources, they provided the services. Without their support, she would be burdened with everything. As things stood, she couldn't afford that.

 _But I can't just let them be until I put my life back together either._

There was no telling what the future would bring for her. Ceara wanted to believe that she and Kouen could work out something that would help with what she would inevitably have to face in a short month. She wanted to believe that there was a way to make this the tiny bit better. But for all she knew her dreadful nightmares could be right and she wouldn't see the day of light for much longer.

Whichever came to be, she wanted to assure their survival.

"I'm glad and touched that you have thought about so much for my sake, Seijin." A smile spread across Seijin's face at hearing her words but at seeing the crooked smile she gave him, his faltered. "But I don't plan on stopping. I'll see that this is done like I have before but with how this is turning out and because of what you told me, I know I cannot do this alone." Ceara gave him a small smile, one she didn't have trouble making genuine. "I apologize for asking and I know how imprudent it is of me, but I will dare ask: are you willing to aid me even with how idiotic this endeavor will be?"

Seijin stared for a few seconds before his smile returned, he gave her a curt nod and saluted her before rising to meet her eyes. "There is no need to ask, master. My answer won't change, no matter the task." He stood tall and the seriousness overtook his smile as he spoke again. "If you believe it to be achievable, then I trust your decision and will sacrifice all of myself to accomplish it."

Ceara gave him a wry smile when he said this. "You're too morbid with words."

All seriousness escaped him as a boyish grin came to him, "It's the truth. Pardon my language but screw them and their gossip." Ceara scoffed at that; the boy had certainly learned that from her. "They know nothing of what you stand for or who you are. Half of them don't care enough to find out. I do and you've taught me much about yourself simply by what you've done. Knowing what I know about you, no person would be sane to believe those rumors. No one that does what you do for your country, its people, and those you hold close would ever betray them. At least, that is what I think, master."

Finding him to be so loyal and faithful was refreshing in its own. The young boy had no fear of talking freely to her after almost a year of serving under her. And like Kougyoku before him, Seijin had changed in their short time together. They had changed and were trying to help her change in the process. Even without knowing the full truth, Seijin kept to his beliefs and she could admire that of him. "Then let us work towards a solution for this, Seijin. After all, if we don't, who will?"

"Of course," Seijin agreed with a smile as he saluted her and bowed. "I will do everything in my power to aid you."

She smiled but before she could usher themselves to start working, the doors to her room opened unceremoniously with a loud clatter. Ceara sighed somewhat irritated that ever since the assignment of her detail, no one respected her privacy anymore. They would knock but seldom waited for a response before entering. Thankfully, this wasn't one of the times the guards or handmaidens had abruptly come in unannounced. The fact that it had been Ri Seishuu that had entered made her forget about her annoyance and instead she stood from her place to meet the Household Member.

"Seishuu-dono?" Seijin asked, surprised that he would enter uninvited.

Seishuu gave the boy a curt nod before walking up to Ceara's desk with a brief salute. "The young master has requested your presence at his study."

 _Finally…_

Not wanting to waste any more time, she began rolling the scrolls back up but clumsily doing so with how anxious she was. Seijin took her hands away from the mess on her desk and smiled as she lifted her gaze to meet his. "I will take care of organizing everything on this end for when you arrive. I'll also begin assembling what ideas I can to solve this problem. You go on ahead, young miss."

Young miss—she scoffed at the forced title. He must've gotten it from what Seishuu and the rest of them called Kouen and she found it sort of adorable that he would attempt to mimic them. Rustling the top of his head, Ceara nodded before following behind Seishuu to Kouen's private study. To her surprise at arriving there, Kouen wasn't as alone as she would have liked. Koumei was there as well and although she didn't dislike his company—on the contrary, he was a wonderful person to have in depth talks with—she wasn't so sure she felt comfortable talking with him in the room. As luck would have it, though, she caught the tail end of their conversation that stopped when she and Seishuu entered the center room of the study.

Kouen swiftly dismissed Seishuu, thanking him for delivering her, and the two princes bore their stares down at her. It felt uncomfortable, especially because Koumei's was a gelid stare that wouldn't subside.

After a few more seconds of nothing but that, Ceara found herself irked enough to raise her voice. "Was I called for a reason or just for this?"

The older prince scoffed and sat back against his chair, resting his elbow on the armrest and bringing his hand up to lean his head against it. "Leave us, Koumei."

"As you wish, my brother and king." Ceara wasn't surprised by his agreeing but didn't miss the light in his eyes as he passed by her that told her she wasn't as unscatched from guilt as his aloofness made it seem. That didn't surprise her either. For as calm as he appeared to be, Koumei was the most perceptive of them all in her opinion. Kouen had his own expertise which he excelled in, all of the Ren siblings did, but Koumei worked in a completely different level. If she had to call it anything, it would be pure genius.

"I was told about your midnight crusade."

"Oh, that." There wasn't much to say about it, frankly, but she went with the simple truth. "I couldn't sleep. I needed air."

"You understand why the number of guards was incremented then."

Ceara nodded but was quickly getting tired of this roundabout chitchat. Here she thought that he wasn't good for that—he wasn't, really. This just prolonged things that, for once, she actually wanted to talk about. Taking the sit that was across from his desk, she sat straight and kept her gaze upon him as he disregarded her presence to read.

This just made her angry and very impatient. "I'm sure you didn't just call me to have me sit here while you read." Kouen let out a sigh that made her sit straighter, her muscles stiffening in anticipation. He raised his gaze but at doing so, he scoffed. That just blew her temper off completely. "All right," she called, pushing herself up and letting the chair scrape against the floor as she stood, "I didn't wait this long for you to simply deride me."

"Sit," he ordered, their eyes locking instantly.

"Not if you won't take this seriously," she told him. "You promised to help me."

"And I shall make good on my word," he assured her. "But you cannot let your emotions take over so easily." He scowled after having said this and let his scroll fall onto the desk. "If I recall, we spent the better time of a year working to fix that. It'd be a shame to have you regress."

"You—are—" but she didn't finish the sentence she had began to punctuate and instead sat down against her chair once more. "Nevermind." She took a moment to compose herself which he took to go back to reading. The action made it a bit harder for her to calm down but she somehow managed. Letting one last breath out, she leaned in eyeing the scrolls he was reading. "Balbadd?" A small 'mm' was all that he gave as he continued. Leaning closer to manage and read some of the characters upside down, Ceara mused about its contents. "It's going well, it seems. Any problems?"

"Some citizens rioting," he admitted before furling the scroll back up. "But they will be taken care of like the others."

"There's been others?"

He nodded and leaned back against his chair as she stared up at him, her chin leaning against her palms as she rested her elbows against the desk. "A handful but not enough to be of any consequence. Do you care?"

It was her turn to nod then. "They're people—our people—and they're scared; it'll take more than just a year or two for the citizens to acclimate. At least that will be true for those that fought hard for Balbadd's independence."

"They will acclimate soon," Kouen corrected. "There is no option for later."

Ceara couldn't disagree with that. Not without any good counter argument at least. This was how things were and there was little she could do to change them. Least of all now when she was in such perilous position.

Especially mentally. Rubbing her eyes, she sighed and cupped her hands against her mouth before groaning into them.

"You seem worse for wear."

"What a gentlemanly thing to say," Ceara pointed out as she let her chin drop onto the desk. He wasn't wrong, though. "I wasn't lying about why I snuck out the other day. I haven't slept much in the past week."

"I can imagine."

"No, you can't," she mumbled, pressing her face against the wooden surface.

"They're nightmares." The odd yet accurate statement made her think that it might just have been more than just a guess. Before she could ask about it, though, he added, "It's natural to regress after a provoking event. Certainly, Magnostadt did that to you."

"You sound like you've experience this before." Her unasked question went unanswered. Knowing she would get no reply if he didn't want to, she opted to start the one conversation they had delayed for a few minutes now. "I kept thinking about what you told me ever since we last met."

"Did you happen about any realization?" he asked curious.

Ceara shook her head and raised it from atop the desk before coming back against her sit and staring up at the ceiling. "Nothing new. Just—I've realized how badly I want to understand." This caught his full attention and she noticed it so she continued on with her train of thought. "Ever since I let her go and I told you the truth, I've felt stranded. Although I feel the weight both physically and mentally, it's more mental than anything. I can't sleep, when I do nightmares haunt me, and I can't help but be irritated that I know the how but not the why." Remembering something from before, she lowered her face to meet his eyes. "You said you had some idea. Can you explain it to me again?"

He kept her gaze for a while longer before he answered. "I've thought about it and I suppose that I can try explaining it to you again in a different way." Stopping briefly, Ceara scooted as close as the chair allowed, lifting her legs so that her feet could rest on the cushioned bottom. "You're afraid of rejection."

Ceara's brow furrowed at that simple yet complicated answer. It rung a bell but she quickly quieted it with a fist to the side of her temple. "I don't—"

"Understand," he said with her as if knowing what she would say. "I feared as much."

"Is something wrong with me?" she asked straight forward with a tilt of her head. She was equal parts scared and curious about what the answer to that question would be. There hadn't been much thought to it but she wanted an answer.

"In the sense of the word, yes."

"Can't you give me a straight answer just once?" she asked back as she drummed her fingers against the wooden desk.

"This isn't something that can be sorted with a 'straight answer,' Ceara," he reminded her with a stern tone. The moment he said this, Ceara flinched slightly as her fingers stopped their repetitive motion.

 _He's right._

"Is it too hard to explain in a simpler way then?" she asked. "I know you're trying, I can tell by how annoyed you're starting to get."

"I am not."

"You are," she corrected. "It's easy to tell now. Like you said, we spent the better part of a year working on my temper, remember? And I could tell when I was getting on your nerves. Kind of like how I'm doing right now, so I'm going to let you continue."

Kouen took a second to compose himself; Ceara could tell by the the fact that he took a whole minute to do so that she might had been pushing him too far. Once he was ready to continue, he settled on an example that brought her own temper to rise again.

"Pretend that I intend to strip Kougyoku and Kouha of their status."

"That's an awful start to this."

"Be quiet," he said sternly, slamming one hand against the desk. " _Pretend_ that I do that because I deem their heritage unfeasible. That I strip them of all they knew and will know because, despite being my own father's children, they are not fully my siblings."

"I don't like it...but all right," she agreed.

"What would you have to say about that?"

"That you're out of your mind for taking all away from them because of something as inconsequential as their blood."

"Why?"

"Because heritage shouldn't matter where skill is concerned," she confessed. "Kouha is smart and courageous and has the respect of the many he's accepted that are like him. Kougyoku has the best swordsmanship I have ever seen, is compassionate, and holds you in the highest esteem. Not to mention their infallible loyalty to you and Koumei. All in all, it wouldn't make sense—."

"No," he immediately stopped her with that one word. "Logically, I know it makes no sense. We both know that. But why would it be erroneous to do such thing to them." Ceara's brow furrowed unable to understand how her words had failed to answer his question. His fingers came to the bridge of his nose for a second before he thought of something, "For once, don't think with your head. Think like you did back in Hakucho, before I taught you to think rationally. Be rash—don't think, feel."

 _Feel…_

The request was unusual, especially when it came from Kouen who often opted for a more logical solution. But his request wasn't hard to do. Thinking rationally took some effort where empathy didn't. And with that mindset on, Ceara could very well imagine what he spoke of. If he ever where to disown Kougyoku and Kouha simply because they weren't fully related…

"It would tear them apart."

"Why?"

"Because…" she closed her eyes and tried imagining the scene. It wasn't hard to do. She could imagine Kouha returning to his fits of violence, unable to take that the two brothers he valued had disowned him like their father had. She could imagine Kougyoku receding back to that meek girl that couldn't stand for herself because she would think herself useless once more by being disowned by them. She could imagine them both lost without a place to belong. And she could understand what they would feel. "When you don't believe in yourself to begin with, that the people you hold closest to you—that you would do anything to prove yourself to—reject you like that would destroy what sense of yourself you already have." Her hand came up to her chest being unable to ignore the tightness in it. "They would lose any sense of belonging they had. They would be lost when all they wanted was your approval."

Kouen's hand reached out to touch hers to make her lift her gaze. At doing so, her blue eyes locked against crimson. "And them spurning you is what terrifies you. What they say or do won't matter—not when you hold them in the highest of esteems. They could kill country after country, torture each and every person that stood on this earth and you would still hold them as saints. But the moment you stand on the receiving end of that hatred, you are the one they are destroying. A being of their creation that they can destroy as easily as they have built you."

Ceara felt a burn at the edge of her eyes that she quickly blinked away. Picking her hands up, she rubbed the heel of her hands against her eyes.

"Do you understand?" he asked, his voice suddenly a bit softer than before.

"A-A little," she replied with a small sniffle. "B-But isn't that normal?" she contradicted somewhat mad. "Isn't it normal that I would be scared of them spurning or hating me? They're my everything."

"That's exactly what they shouldn't be," he countered. "They can be important to you—siblings or not, family or not—but they cannot be everything. By placing them there you're putting them in the most optimal place to hurt you, to destroy you. You cling your existence too much to what they perceive of you."

She could feel her chest tighten further, squeezing her heart painfully, and this time she let the tears that came flow over. "Is that really so bad?"

"Yes," he replied. "Existing for the sake of others can make you strong but your mentality leaves you at a disadvantage where one would find strength."

"I don't see how that is bad, though?"

"If it came down to you or them, who would you—"

"Them."

Kouen couldn't keep the irritated sigh that escaped him and that bothered Ceara simply because she didn't see why he thought it was so bad that she thought this way. "You find strength in such decision but it will be at the cost of your existence. Tell me, what good will you be if you're dead?"

Her mouth opened, ready to give a retort, but her mind came back with nothing. She was at a deadlock because of his words.

What good would she be dead?

 _I wouldn't be able to be here with them. I would never see Sousei's cheeky smile or hear Suisei's giddy laughter. I wouldn't be able to laugh at Judar's silly antiques, tease Kouha, or even laugh with Kougyoku. I wouldn't have time with Seijin or even spar and talk with Hakuryuu and Hakuei. I wouldn't be able to learn from Koumei. I wouldn't be able to be here with En._

A sudden realization hit her—one that both scared and elucidated something way too quickly. Unable to keep herself still, she got out of her seat and began pacing the room. Kouen didn't bother her sitting up and instead allowed her the room to think, a gesture she was grateful for despite not noticing it straight away.

 _I don't want that._

"Ceara—"

"I don't want that," she repeated under her breath as she stopped with her back to the desk, her mind starting to clear from the mess it had turned into. Turning to face him, Ceara held onto the back of her chair to keep herself balanced as she held herself with shaky legs. "I don't want to leave them."

Kouen's eyes narrowed on her but asked her his subsequent query all the same. "Why don't you?"

"Because—" she exclaimed, exhausted and annoyed that he couldn't understand her. "I just don't _want_ that!"

It wasn't until after she had said this that Ceara noticed she had raised her voice considerably higher. Not wanting to meet his penetrating gaze, she kept her own on the floor and chair before her. The silence let her hear things that she hadn't paid attention to before; she could hear her heart beating fast, her breathing shallow, and could hear how her muscles tensed with her growing anxiousness.

But the tightness in her chest had left. It flew away with her voice and claim.

"You're beginning to understand then."

Equally shocked as she was confused, she lifted her head in time to see him rise from his seat. Ceara stood in place as Kouen went about as if nothing, taking some of the scrolls he had been reading to return them.

"Kouen, I don't—"

"Bring me those if you would," he interrupted, pointing at the few scrolls he had left behind. Ceara paused for a second and groaned before going back to retrieve the few he left behind. Holding them to her bosom, she trotted after him wanting some clarification. She stood behind him as he put each scroll meticulously in its place. His fingers traced each shelf as if he could read each inscription that denoted their place and finding were the ones he had taken belonged.

"I shouldn't have said that," Ceara instantly declared after her mind had time to think things through. "It's selfish of me—"

"It's not." Her arms wrapped around the scrolls tighter at hearing this. Kouen stared down after having finished replacing the ones he had in his hand. He reached out and grabbed the end of one of hers and pulled it out. "It's natural to think about yourself before others. It has kept many alive during times of hardships, what kept you alive after losing so much."

"But being selfish like that can't possibly be good for anybody."

"Not when it turns into greed or envy. But caring for yourself is normal. Not wanting to be alone is normal; wanting to fight because you don't want to lose those close to you is normal."

"But you said that I _shouldn't_ cling myself to them." All this roundabout was seriously giving her a headache. "Isn't fighting because of them the same thing as clinging?"

"I didn't say fight because of them. I said fight because you don't _want_ to lose them," he corrected, taking a couple more to put into place. "Be and live for what you want. If you truly care for them then their safety and wellbeing will fall in accordance to your desires. It's simple nature."

"Nature?" she repeated.

He nodded and took the last of the scrolls leaving her to stand as he finished. "Nature's course is deliberate, nothing ever left to chance. Survival—physical or mental—is no different. All that we do is ensure that survival. They benefit your mental health as skewed as that is for you at the moment. They have kept you sane through this whole ordeal, have they not?"

Ceara averted her eyes to stare at her feet. As embarrassing as it felt to have that said aloud, she couldn't deny the truth of his words. It was because of them that she felt valued, loved, and like she belonged. Just as she was about to say this, Kouen continued as if not having expected an answer to what he thought obvious.

"Did it never occur to you that perhaps you're persistence of sacrificing it all for them is not for their well being but for your own?"

Ceara couldn't keep her breath from hitching at that statement. Reaching to the shelf beside her, she leaned closer to it wanting some support as her mind and heart fought each other. Things she remembered hearing from both recent and times long gone rushed in that reminded her too much of what Kouen asked.

" _We, as an army, fight because we want a better future, because we want the suffering to end. I fight because I want you to live in a grand nation of peace."_

 _Cael._

" _Be free to live the life that you want to live."_

 _Kohaku._

" _What I want?"_ A woman's soft chuckle resonated in her head making her grab onto its side as it began aching much more than before. _"I guess I want to help build this country. If I do, I know that you and the others and myself will have a place to call home. We'll be safe and you all will be free to do whatever is it your hearts desire."_

 _Who…?_

"Ceara?"

The echo that rang through her head died down when Kouen's voice overwhelmed her hearing. She was so indulged in her own head and memories— _can I call such thing a memory?—_ that she failed to hear him calling her and even missed his hand over her shoulder.

"I-I'm fine," she muttered, trailing his arm to find his hand and remove it from her shoulder. "Just...overwhelmed, I suppose."

"Let us stop for today," Kouen told her. As overwhelmed and slightly confused as she was, Ceara could do nothing more than agree.

As he walked out of the aisle, she stayed behind wanting to have some time to compose herself before leaving the study. That time was cut short when Kouen's voice rose over the silence, reaching her ears and bringing one name to them.

"Did you need anything, Kougyoku?"

 _Kougyoku?_

"Y-Yes." Ceara walked quietly to the edge of the aisle to hear the small voice the girl held when talking to her older brother. "I was wondering if you had seen anegimi by any chance, onii-sama?"

"Who?"

"Oh, that's right. Um…"

Poor girl was flustered. Wanting to safe her from any further embarrassment, Ceara stepped from out of her hiding spot and called out to Kougyoku, "I believe that would be me."

Ceara saw Kouen mouth Kougyoku's reference to her as if puzzled but Kougyoku's enthused exclamation cut both their trains of thought as she approached her. "Anegimi, I knew I would find you here if anywhere," Kougyoku called out with a small sense of pride. "Would you accompany me for dinner tonight?"

"Dinner?" Ceara asked. It took a moment for her mind to work again and with it she remembered the promise she had made to the young princess a few days prior. "Oh yes, your celebration. Tonight?"

The princess deflated at the question, her eyes widening slightly in disbelief and pouting as her shoulders dropped. "Is it not possible today either?"

"It's not that!" Ceara quickly corrected, raising her hands in small protest. "Of course I'll go. You just caught me, well, in the middle of something is all."

"Something?" Kougyoku blinked at her a few times and turned to do the same to her brother. The princess did this double-take in disbelief a couple of more times before ending back with Ceara. It was then that out of the blue her usual porcelain skin brightened into a flush of red all the way to her ears before she started mumbling incoherently. "I-I-I-I'm so s-s-sorry about i-i-interrupting the t-t-t-two of you!"

"Kougyoku, you're muttering," Kouen reminded her but it did little to calm the nervous wreck that she had become with what Ceara could only assume was a ludicrous assumption concocted by the young girl's wild imagination.

"It's not like that, Kougyoku," Ceara clarified with a small chuckle. At hearing this, Kougyoku snapped out of her stupor and went into a whole new tirade about how sorry she was about assuming such thing.

As Ceara waited for Kougyoku's tirade to be over, she glanced over to the prince that simply raised an eyebrow at his sister's odd reaction. The fact that he hadn't caught any meaning behind Kougyoku's words told her how little he minded the idea. Ceara couldn't blame him for it, either. As the two of them stood now, Kougyoku's little fantasy would stay as such. And a part of Ceara felt somewhat depressed about that reality.

Not wanting to think about that anymore, she turned to Kougyoku feigning a cheery smile. "Forget about that, we're done anyway. Is everything for dinner ready?"

"Ka Koubun assured me it would be ready by dinnertime," Kougyoku told her when suddenly her expression changed with a glint in her eyes. "We should go back and dress you."

"That's unnecessary," Ceara dismissed with a wave of her hand but stopped when the princess' eyes widened and she pouted. "I-I mean, wouldn't it take far too long to do that when dinnertime is just in an hour?"

"It's more than enough time!" Kougyoku assured her, grabbing her hands in her own and shaking them. Ceara pondered it as the young princess kept begging her for it. She was about to decline again when Kougyoku brought out the real hitter. "Won't you do it for me?"

 _Cheater._

There was no use fighting against that look. Years of trying to against Sou and Sui had been utterly fruitless and she was sure it would only be the same with Kougyoku. Giving a curt nod and a defeated sigh, Ceara gave in with a small smile. Instantly, Kougyoku invigorated like the happiest child she had ever seen but as she rambled on about what she could wear, Ceara's gaze wandered off to Kouen. The prince had already dismissed their presence and was merely going about gathering other scrolls to read.

The thought came to her as she watched him place the pile of scrolls onto his desk. Asking Kougyoku for a second, Ceara walked up to him and warranted enough attention for him to lift his head.

"Join us."

Behind her, Kougyoku instantly became a mess of putters certainly at the audacity of even asking such question. Kouen didn't seemed fazed in the least and instead turned his eyes back to the scroll he had opened.

"I'm afraid I will have to decline."

Despite it only being a quiet disappointed breath, Ceara heard Kougyoku exhale against her sleeves. Not wanting for the young girl to feel so deflated when it was supposed to be a celebration for her, Ceara was not going to take a no for an answer. Stepping closer, she reached out and laid her hand atop the one he was using to keep the end of the scroll propped up and lowered them both, forcing him to stop and gaze back at her.

He wasn't angry. He seemed slightly irritated but beyond that gave her his attention. That was more than enough.

With a quiet whisper, she continued in her attempt to convince him. "She just got promoted as general of your army—a woman and young princess—I think that's worth celebrating."

"I am fully aware," he replied, his brow knitted down into a frown. "I gave her the position. If you intend to celebrate, by all means do so. However, I don't see the need for my presence."

Ceara tightened her hold on his hand and nodded but smiled all the same as she gave it the best try she could. "She's your sister, En. I think after all we've been talking about, you would understand why this would be the best celebration for her if her older brothers would join us."

Even after she finished, his gaze didn't leave her and neither did he push her away. Quietly, Ceara pleaded for him to give her this—if not because she asked, then for Kougyoku.

It took a few minutes but after that he sighed and sat up to glance over at Kougyoku. "Be sure to tell the staff that Koumei and I will be joining you."

"The both of you?" she asked, surprisingly not stuttering.

He nodded and began rolling the scroll he had back up only to leave it aside with the rest. "I'll have Chuu'un inform Koumei so that he attends as well. So be sure to inform them." His gaze turned back and bore unto Ceara with a raised brow, "That is all, correct?"

Ceara couldn't keep the smile that tugged at one corner of her lips. Trying her hardest to keep it hidden, she nodded and turned to her side to grab Kougyoku's hand as the young girl burst out in giddiness. Dismissing themselves to go prepare for dinner, Ceara walked out dragging the princess who, once they were outside, would not stop thanking her about convincing Kouen to join them.

"It's very nice to see Kouen onii-sama in such high spirits as of late," Kougyoku seemingly pointed out from nowhere, surprising Ceara. The man certainly appeared a bit more stressed than usual but at the same time, she also noticed something off about him too. She just couldn't pinpoint what exactly but high spirits wasn't exactly what she had imagined.

"How do you mean?"

"Well," Kougyoku began as they reached her room. She gave some requests to her handmaidens before turning back to Ceara. "The summit meeting has him expectant but I can also tell that the few times he has talked to you have also...calmed him? I'm unsure if that would be the correct word."

"Calm how?"

"In a way, he looks sort of at peace," Kougyoku suggested. "I-It's a little hard to explain. But I certainly notice a change in you, too, anegimi."

There was no hiding the cynicism that escaped her then. "It certainly doesn't feel like that."

"But it is somewhat visible, if one cares to look," the young princess suggested. "You don't seem as distracted when I do get to see you, as hard as that has become."

The conversation ended there without either of them wanting to, the subject being untouched grounds since their arrival. The silence between them remained as the handmaidens arrived and began preparing them for dinner; the time it took to do so, Kougyoku's mood brightened apparently as she began to care for her clothes and makeup alongside Ceara's. Not wanting to bring her down anymore for the day, Ceara didn't even complain and agreed to whatever Kougyoku wished to dress her in. Apparently, she had learned much from Kouha and that helped with her choice of wardrobe for Ceara. Despite the girl's usual extravagance, Ceara's hanfu was a more simple white that shifted down to a pastel but with gold outlines of birds sown closer to the ends of her skirts and sleeves. Her sash, in comparison, was a bright royal blue tied behind her with tinted black ends and embroidered with darker flowers, leaves, and birds. She wore fitting shoes of a black color which were comfortable. To wrap everything up, she took a sit for Kougyoku as the young girl dismissed her handmaidens and she began to do Ceara's hair and makeup herself. Surprisingly, and unlike before, Kougyoku had actually finished before her.

"You seem pale," Kougyoku mentioned as she began applying the foundation on her skin.

"I've had trouble sleeping as of late," she replied, trying not to move for her. But as her mind wandered, she began to wonder if Kougyoku had questions about all that had happened and changed in the short week back. _Of course she would._ There was no way she or anybody that saw the detail that followed her ever since their return wouldn't. But after their talk and her promise to seek help if she ever needed it, Ceara could sense the faith that Kougyoku had in her. But Ceara could also tell how much it hurt the girl to have this distance between them, how much she herself was pushing her away.

Lost in her own train of thought, she had completely missed everything that Kougyoku had said and caught onto the trail of the one-sided conversation as soon as she could. The young girl was worried, apparently, about how her complexion had changed and how she seemed fairly tired all the time now.

Ceara couldn't agree more. She felt tired both physically and mentally. As Kougyoku finished with her makeup and went on with her hair, she simply raised her head and stared at the pink-haired girl that stood behind her through the mirror. Kougyoku was more preoccupied with finding something to do with her hair and wasn't noticing Ceara's incessant staring.

 _Why does she believe in me?_

She had told her why already: they were friends. At least she thought of them that way. Ceara wasn't so sure she did herself. After all, she had realized long ago that people came to love a part of her that wasn't real.

" _Now you have the power to change that, little one."_ Murmur. Having set Beleth and Murmur on her lap while Marbas remained on her wrist, she tightened her grip on the carnation hairpin out of security and query. The djinn noticed without a problem and responded in kind as he explained the meaning behind his cryptic words. _"They know you are not who you've claimed to be. That bridge has been made as broken as it may be. If you can fix it, it will ease their crossing; they could understand you better, and could come to understand your choices as well."_

 _I'm not ready for that._ If she couldn't fathom telling the twins, how could she muster any courage to do it with anybody else that wasn't urging her to?

" _But you want for them to understand...do you not?"_

Want. It amazed her how often she began hearing that word as of late. But despite the irony, she couldn't deny that a part of her had always wanted for others to question, to understand. Hakuyuu had done so. Kouen was doing so. But those had all been coaxed confessions, and they had taken a long time to come to that understanding.

The mere thought brought back Kouen's words from their first talk when she first confessed to everything. _"Don't let it come and catch you off guard. Take the first step and manage what happens as you let it come to you."_ As well as the words from just mere hours ago, _"Be and live for what you want."_

Doing what Kouen asked would take a lot of strength but it would give her something she hadn't had in a long time: control.

 _I want that._

Not noticing the quiet, Kougyoku rummaged through her drawers for a hairpin to hold the small bun she had made to fall just on the nape of Ceara's neck. Reaching down between her sleeves, Ceara procured Murmur's Metal Vessel and reached out to Kougyoku. The young princess stared at the ornament, her eyes widening in recognition of the piece.

"That's—"

"Murmur. He's the first djinn I captured, even before Beleth, back when I was very young. But after what...what happened, I couldn't bring myself to use him when I knew Kohaku was inside...trapped. So I left him by himself. I don't want to do that to him again." Ceara's eyes wandered down to the piece before coming up and locking with magenta again, "Would you use him to hold my hair in place?"

Kougyoku paused for a second before a small smile came to her lips and she nodded, taking the hairpin in her dainty hands. Ceara closed her eyes as she felt Kougyoku's gentle hands placing the hairpin to hold the bun in place; at opening her eyes, she saw her reflection and how the carnation reflected the faint gaslight.

" _One step goes a long way,"_ Murmur said with a chuckle as Ceara saw Kougyoku's face beside hers in the reflection. _"And fear of what might happen should not stop you. If it does, you will never know what could have been: the good or bad. But if you overcome it, it all will be under your control."_

 _I understand better now. Thank you._

"There," Kougyoku mused with a quiet hum. "Perfect."

"Thank you...and Kougyoku?"

"Mm?"

"My name…" Ceara felt her throat go dry for a second making her gulp. But after quickly mustering what courage she had, she muttered the sentence. "M-My name—it's Ceara...of Ériu ."

Fear crawled up her spine and made her stomach turn at Kougyoku's wide-eyed expression. Praying in her head that she had done the right thing, Ceara almost felt like crying as the quiet extended past the second. Before she could drown herself, though, a warm smile came to Kougyoku, one she noticed was genuinely touched by the gesture.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Ceara of Ériu," she replied and came to stand before Ceara's sit. Stretching her hand out, Kougyoku's smile widened even further. "I am the Eighth Princess of the Kou Empire, Ren Kougyoku, and I truly hope that we can be friends."

The gesture warmed Ceara in an unimaginable way. _We're starting over._ Gulping down her sobs, Ceara stood and bowed before taking Kougyoku's hand in her own to shake it. A strange strength filled her and helped her speak through the knot in her throat as she smiled back.

"It's my pleasure, Kougyoku. And I certainly would love to be your friend."

* * *

As Kouen had promised, both he and Koumei attended the dinner, the younger brother obviously having trouble staying awake as it was. The poor man must have been asleep when Chuu'un went to him. But it didn't seem to bother or even catch Kougyoku's attention. In fact, the princess looked childlike as her eyes shone brightly and cheeks dusted a light pink at the sight of her brothers. Ceara just felt a surge of joy seeing her that happy and practically trotted after her as Kougyoku quickly made her way to meet them.

Giving them a curt bow, Ceara stood behind Kougyoku as the princess thanked them for coming, apologizing for interrupting their schedules. Koumei denied such thing despite how obvious it was that he'd been sleeping and congratulated her with a smile. Kouen didn't speak once but the mere fact that he was there seemed to be enough for Kougyoku. The two joined them at the table and dinner promptly was served. Ceara was grateful for the invitation, she had wanted to celebrate her status as general for sometime now, but even with the celebration as an excuse, her stomach refused to work with her. Tied as it had been for days, she barely ate as it was and with this feast it was sure to be noticeable. Thankfully, Kougyoku said nothing and instead focused more on talking her ear off. At least with that Ceara had some distraction and reason to leave her plate untouched.

As Kougyoku told the kitchen staff to bring in dessert, Ceara nonchalantly pushed her plate away for it to be cleaned up by the staff but at doing so caught someone else's attention.

"You didn't eat."

Her eyes came straight to meet Kouen's red gaze and she inwardly groaned, hating for once how much unnecessary attention he gave her when she least wanted it. "I ate too much during the midday."

"You were with me all of midday." Ceara cringed at having forgotten that so easily. Kouen wasn't fazed in the least and rested his chin against his fist leaning to the side. "You are a lousy liar."

"At least I try," she muttered under her breath. This unintentionally caught Kougyoku's attention as she turned to see what her brother had said and with concern knitting her brow down, she questioned Ceara about it. Not wanting to be rude to her when all she meant was well, she had to downplay her lost of appetite by giving her a more convincing version of having eaten too much earlier that day.

"Are you lying to me?" Kougyoku asked with a tilt of her head and a sincere look in her eyes at the innocent question.

"What a callous thing it is to lie to a child." Kouen's mightily vocal taunt didn't do anything to alleviate Kougyoku's doubt; quite the opposite.

And adding to that pyre, most likely out of ire for interrupt his sleep, Koumei saw fit to agree, "How heartless would you have to be to lie to her like that?"

"You two need to be qui—"

"Anegimi?" Guilt rising to catch her throat like a bound rope, Ceara gasped and turned to face the princess who's eyes were slightly glazed over. A part of her wanted to believe they were fake—Kougyoku sometimes did that to pull on Sousei's or her strings—but another didn't care. She couldn't have her sad, not today.

"I-I-I'm not!" she quickly replied but her stutter and the fact that her voice had ever so mildly cracked at saying this told a completely different story. "It's been coming and going with my troubles sleeping that I told you about before," she admitted with a faint smile. "It's just gone for right now is all."

The two brothers raised a single eyebrow each as if in between believing her excuse or not. Thankfully the one person that mattered believed her and Kougyoku gasped in horror as if having remembered that minor detail from their previous conversation. The young princess went on to ask something of a staff member all the while Ceara glared back at the two grown men across from her.

"You are children," she groaned through gritted teeth.

To her surprise, Koumei's lips tugged up in a half-smile. And although she could still sense his guard not leaving him, she could also sense that the familiarity they had grown to have towards each other hadn't completely disappeared either. "It's well merited. You weren't supposed to speak to any of them without permission after all."

 _True but…_

"And you turn to childish jabs as payback?" she asked in disbelief.

"Threats from us seem to do nothing," Kouen mentioned as the staff began coming in with the dessert. As they placed the sweet bread before him, the first prince groaned in his throat and pushed the plate away. "We figured hers would work better."

"We were not disappointed," Koumei added as he began eating his and unlike Kouen seemed to genuinely enjoy the sweet curd treat placed in front of him.

 _These two…_

Brothers or not, they were conspiring against her using Kougyoku as their weapon. The girl didn't seem any wiser about it, though, and instead caught her by surprise by placing a tray in front of her, one that had a teapot and a couple of cups, before placing one before her and serving her. Lifting her gaze from the darkish liquid in her cup, Ceara saw a smile grow on Kougyoku's face as she poured some for herself on another cup before setting it down.

"It's helped me when I couldn't conceive sleep before," she mentioned taking a bite of her dessert before smiling. "I'm hoping it will help you too."

Ceara thanked her and ignored the brothers for the time being as she took the cup in her hands to take a sip of the tea. Valerian. It smelled and tasted divine but her stomach rumbled against the unwanted food.

" _Try, my king,"_ Beleth suggested.

 _I will. I'm tired of being helpless._ Sleep had been restless for the past week and it quickly had taken a toll. Not a large one but still one that bothered her everyday. Forcing herself to drink it bit by bit, she managed to down the cup and quiet her stomach. The warmth of the liquid made her body feel relaxed as the flower's root did it's thing.

"Valerian," Kouen said in a quiet whisper that reached her sensitive ears. The giant man reached over to the pot and served himself a cup more to breathe in than to drink it. "Effective for what it's worth."

"Isn't it?" Kougyoku asked sheepishly as she continued eating her dessert. "Ka Koubun was the one who introduced it to me. It's pretty good, too."

"Are those almond biscuits?" Ceara asked nodding at the cookies that sat beside Kougyoku's curd on her plate. The princess only nodded and offered some which Ceara took for a small bite.

How familiar; she often gave some to the twins as bribe to be good when they were smaller, a tactic she'd learned from Cael. They weren't overly sweet, the right amount of sugar having been added to them, and despite her stomach, the valerian tea and mild sweetness of the biscuits made it calm down as she forced herself to eat little by little.

The conversations shifted from topic to topic over the course of dessert—Koumei's incessant complaints of not having time to sleep now or any other time, Kougyoku's wishes to help them in their endeavors, or Kouen's off-topic, random comments that would lead nowhere. Ceara remained quiet as much as she could not wanting to interfere in the lovely sibling interactions she never got to see. Now she understood why Kougyoku often wanted for her brothers to join her for dinner; she could only imagine the ruckus it would be if Kouha were there with them.

Close to an hour had passed with already two pots of tea having been emptied when a couple of servants came in. Ceara didn't recognize them, possibly messenger soldiers by the looks of how Kouen left the table without a say to meet them. Koumei and Kougyoku followed him briefly with their eyes and fell into a quieter conversation between each other as if knowing this would soon be the end of dinner. It made her wonder if their usual scheduled dinners ended the same. Out of curiosity, Ceara waited, drinking the last of the tea in her lukewarm cup until Kouen returned giving each of them a glance and ending as he spoke to them individually.

Kougyoku was first. "It is time to retire for all of us, late as it is. Kougyoku?" The girl perked up with a shy 'yes,' lifting her head to meet his gaze. "We're proud of you." Ceara could feel the blood flow on her arm stop briefly as Kougyoku gripped her arm tightly in excitement. The first prince then turned to his brother with a sigh, "You go rest."

"Gladly," Koumei replied with a small yawn.

"As for you," Kouen mentioned with a curt nod to Ceara who only stared back wide-eyed. "We need to talk."

Despite how cryptic he was being, no one questioned him and even when she wanted to she found herself following him outside as they walked back to his study. Dinner had taken them longer with all the chitchat, which even she was surprised even happened, and the sky had already darkened with the night that came. Remarkably, Kouen didn't talk about whatever it had been he wanted to talk about until after they were behind closed doors in his private study, a gesture she appreciated.

"Shika's in a state of stagnation," he quickly began and headed to his desk without waiting for her answer. Ceara had to let the information sink before she had the mind to ask him what he meant by that. "The people Koujiro governed have heard his will from Masami. They appreciate Sousei as the only son and legitimate heir, however, they do not want him as governor."

 _What?_

The idea sounded ludicrous to her ears and made her shake her head. "That's idiotic. Who are they claiming to want as governor then?"

"You."

 _Fantastic. Because of course they would._ Ceara groaned and sank back onto the chair that fell across from him, a position she had began to find rather appeasing when her mind scattered. Her fingers rubbed at the bridge of her nose wanting to wane the pain of an oncoming migraine at these news. "I can't."

"Obviously."

"Did Masami attempt to persuade them?"

"From what I was told, she had to do so multiple times to convince them of the better choice," he explained. The fact that he added the 'better' part stung her pride but there was no denying the truth in his words. "She's returning to Rakushou and from there coming to Balbadd."

 _Coming...here?_

"B-But I thought she was to remain in Shika. Now that Sousei is to govern it, shouldn't she remain there as interim governess while he's out in the battlefield with me?"

"In theory, yes," Kouen replied with a groan and rubbed at his temple. "But she went against all orders given to her saying she was concerned about the news of what happened in Magnostadt."

 _Oh god…_ Ceara felt the blood drain from her face as she heard this. Who told her? What did she know? What _didn't_ she know? A bunch of questions popped one after the other as the dread of having her there in Balbadd sooner than they had expected felt all too real.

"She was told only what the public knows," Kouen assured her. His words made her take a small breath and calm herself down as he continued. "But she will be returning in a few weeks."

"Weeks?" she breathed out in disbelief. "Weeks aren't going to be enough for me. I can't get better in weeks."

"This isn't something you'll get better from in a few weeks or even months," he clarified with a furrowed brow. "If you thought so before, you were wrong."

"Well, thanks for letting me know now, I suppose," she said with a heavy sigh. She wasn't stupid. She knew that this wouldn't be better in a few weeks or the month she had been originally given. The best she could have hoped for was a way to deal with whatever pain would come from telling the truth. Now that she knew the problem and was easing into understanding it, she hoped to search into how to 'ameliorate the pain' as Kouen had put it. But weeks…

"This isn't good."

"It isn't," Kouen agreed and sighed heavily. "But it just means we'll have to work faster with what time we do have."

It amazed her how much he was trying to make this work. A few weeks was so little time compared to a month, and that was counting for the actual travel time or arrival to Balbadd. If she was lucky, a huge storm would hit the ship Masami traveled in and strand her in some remote island for a few months or years, preferably for life, but Ceara knew better than to wish ill on others. Especially for the poor soldiers that would be escorting Masami there.

"But you already have your hands full, don't you?" she asked and leaned her head forward slowly until her head came into contact with the wooden surface of his desk. Another groan escaped her at the idea of Masami coming back. Peace was highly overrated in her life. "Between Balbadd and the summit meeting in a couple of months...I don't think this is such a good idea anymore."

"Are you doubting my capabilities?"

"I'm doubting you'll have enough time to rest or even eat at the rate things are going."

Kouen sighed and groaned almost at the same time as he breathed out, humming the words against his throat in the lowest of whispers. "...and I doubt that trait of yours will ever stop caring about others over yourself." Ceara shrunk into herself knowing full well that hadn't been meant for her to hear. He raised his voice quickly after though to refute her claims. "Worry about yourself first. I will manage. You must as well with your own health. Which reminds me, you need to start eating properly."

"I eat properly," she refutes.

"No, you don't. And I'm not only talking about tonight."

This time it was Ceara's turn to groan from irritation. "You know, I still can't discern why you bother putting guards and handmaidens to follow me on my every waking hour when you can simply get all the information you want from Seijin."

"Not all."

That simple statement made her curious and she lifted her face to lay her chin on the wooden surface to have a better look at him. "What do you mean?"

"The boy tells me what I need to know, seldom what I want to know," he responded. "Like how you're struggling with sleep, interfering with your guards—"

"One time."

"—or missing meals to work instead."

"I'm being productive, aren't I?" she argued with a frown. "I thought you out of everyone would understand and appreciate that."

"Working yourself until you drop sick won't help anybody, least of all you," he countered, his voice getting sterner. "Having to deal with Koumei's fits of sickness from overexerting himself is trouble enough. I don't need you to add to it as well."

"I don't get sick," she pouted, having lost any strength to keep arguing.

"Tell me that when you faint in the middle of the day and have to stay in bed to recuperate for two."

 _Sounds like he's had his share of trouble with Koumei, indeed._

But she wasn't that stupid. She knew her limits; it's how she trained herself to djinn equip. Knowing where her limits were and how to best exploit herself when not fully recovered were things she did best. Having been bullied by Masami for years had helped nurture that ability of hers too.

"It's not like I can do much about it even if I wanted to. And believe me, I do," she admitted finally lifting her head and resting it against her folded arms on the desk. Sleep evaded her like a lost sheep from a shepherd boy and the nightmares—which she never remembered much of except for her incessant fear and mania—didn't help much either. The unbalance in her sleep only aggravated her already low appetite that she qualmed with tea or fruits. Never food. Not after the one time she forced herself to eat three days after their arrival to find herself puking it a few hours later from the nausea. The only reason she could think of that the small biscuits from dinner remained settled in her stomach now was because of the valerian tea.

But she could feel the tea taking its effects as her eyelids grew a tad bit heavier while staring out toward the shelves of scrolls and books. Raising her head from its place, she rubbed at her eyes just as a yawn came out of her mouth.

"I beg to differ from what I'm witnessing," he smugly said with a lopsided grin.

"It's the stupid tea," she pouted as another yawn came. "I don't want to sleep."

"Going on like this isn't good, Ceara," he reminded her. "You have to rest and find a way to eat."

"I hate my nightmares." The confession seemed to take the prince by mild surprise but by that point her grogginess and irritation were showing and cutting her patience shorter than usual. "I can't sleep and when I do, I dream of fires and people dying. I'm tired of seeing those things."

"What fires?"

The sudden change of tone took Ceara aback. It was stern but there was some other underlying tone as well. Interest or perhaps, dare she think, concern. Either way, she was too mentally exhausted after a week of not sleeping and too sleepy from the tea to care what she answered with.

"Sometimes the one from the Reizei estate of when Kohaku passed. Others of the one in Rakushou..." And then there were those she had no idea of where they were. And despite that, she could swear they felt familiar. "I meet people but then they burn and the fire consumes everything. I can't run away. I burn too. Then I wake up."

"Are they that vivid?"

Ceara only nodded. "At least from what I remember. It isn't much more than small parts. I don't remember what we talk about although I'm pretty sure we do talk a lot." She rubbed at her eyes again as they began to feel heavy, "I've had them ever since we came back."

"Kohaku's release must have caused them," he said bluntly. At this point, she had to agree as that was the same conclusion she'd come to. She knew the cause; she only wished she could find how to get rid of them.

She really wanted to sleep. Kouen continued talking and the sound of his voice reverberated in her ears, an easy and deep baritone timbre that eased her mind. After sometime listening to it, his voice had become a sound that calmed her the more she heard it. Right now, it lulled her. Soon enough, she didn't bother rubbing at her eyes and instead indulged in the sound of his voice before closing her eyes.

* * *

"Honestly…"

Kouen sighed as he stopped briefly to look at the woman that had been leaning back against her chair quietly. A little too quietly. It wasn't until he raised his gaze that he noticed she had fallen asleep with her arms wrapped around her knees as they were brought close to her body and her head falling to the side to rest against her shoulder.

The tea had done its job well enough. Her incessant eye rubbing had stopped as quickly as it had started and ended with her falling asleep. At least she would be dealing with a problem of hers with that. Even before he had heard from her about her troubles sleeping, he could tell how her complexion had changed. It was subtle but evident even after a week. It also brought concern to his mind for some reason. The woman was slowly starving and depriving herself of rest, most likely subconsciously, and she was having a hard time dealing with that. This would certainly not help her or make his job any easier on helping her with her other problem. She needed to be fully focused on the task for it to be beneficial.

Being sleep deprived and starving would not help either of them. But bringing her to her room now would only be a hassle. Instead, he stood and picked her up from the chair. Like times before, he could tell how small she was even more so now with what he could only assume to be a week of starvation. Bringing her closer to the window, he laid her down on the windowsill where the sit was wide enough to accommodate her even with the small shifts she made as he settled her there. Groaning in her sleep for a second, she rubbed at her face before going back to sleep quietly.

So peaceful. He wondered what kind of nightmares could disrupt such peaceful sleep. It intrigued him, especially because of what she dreamt of. Fires...of Rakushou and Shika. Those were nightmares he had had himself over a decade ago when the fire and subsequent deaths of the emperor and crown princes came to happen. He had been away and the guilt drove him to have fitful rest. It lasted for a while but they eventually decreased until they ceased to be.

Kouen had tried his best to ignore them and the hectic time of his father taking sit as emperor certainly made that an easy task, but Ceara had only worse things to think about other than bouts of nightmares. Her affliction, that wrecked mindset of hers, didn't allow for many positivity, he would imagine. And a part of him felt empathetic towards her.

Brushing the sentiment aside, he moved a single chair closer to where she laid asleep and grabbed a couple of scrolls before sitting down to read them. From time to time, when she moved, his eyes would wander up to her only to wait for a few seconds for her to go back to breathing evenly. In one of her many shifts, he watched as the tresses of her hair fell onto her face making her nose scrunch like it usually did from the feeling. Her hands sluggishly swept at her face in an attempt to move them but only managed to make the problem worse. Compelled by her struggle, he reached out and brushed the locks of caramel aside and away from her face. The scrunch of her nose lessened until it went away and she returned to sleep.

It was hard for Kouen to understand how the young woman before her had gotten herself into such a problem. And calling it a problem was a colossal understatement. For all his attempts to help alleviate the situation—as foreign as the urge to do so was—it never ceased to baffle him how a little girl had set all those events into motion.

A little girl stuck by her longing to be loved and belong when it had all been taken away.

 _And I was a great part of what put you in that course._

Was that it? Was it guilt that drove him to help her in whatever way he could? What made him feel concern for her wellbeing? Or was guilt only a part of it?

 _It can't be._

It felt irrational. It couldn't be the only thing that spurred him into action. No, this wasn't simple guilt for being the cause of Cael's death. Although, that certainly made up a good portion of why he was doing all this.

No. This was something else. It had to be.

Kouen sighed exhausted from thinking so much for once as he let the scroll in his hands fall to his lap. "I'm overthinking this." But a part of him—an overwhelming part at that—spoke to the contrary.

A sudden groan made him look up at Ceara who was frowning in her sleep as she shifted from side to side. Surprised since she had been asleep for a good hour, Kouen watched expecting this to be just more tossing and turning. Her hands, though, began to grasp at everything and anything, holding her clothes or the pillows of the windowsill sit. It took a few minutes for her to fully start thrashing until she hit the window hard enough to push herself off from the windowsill. Out of simple reflex, Kouen dropped everything in his hands and caught her just in time to avoid her falling head first onto the floor. The moment his arms came to hold her, she gasped loudly a moment before her eyes shut open. Wide and wild, they flickered back and forth until the stark blue eyes found his face and all at once her shallow breathing hitched in disbelief.

"...En?"

"You fell asleep. You were having a ni—" But before he could even finish, Ceara threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing her face against the crook of his neck. The close proximity felt odd for a second until he began hearing her small, quiet sobs.

"You're—you're okay. N-Nothing's wrong. Nothing's going to happen." Her repeated assurances mingled with her sobs, her grip around him tightening and her body trembling. "I-It's you, right? Y-You're really here...right?"

The simple yet shaky sound of her voice startled him. She wasn't just scared; she was horrified. An urge came over him, one that prompted him to wrap his arms around her and hold her closer to himself. As he did this, he felt her stiffen at his touch, her sobs halting for a brief second, before she completely relaxed and the sobs returned but in a much quieter volume. But a mere reassurance from him drove her past the point of quiet whimpers.

"I'm here."

At hearing that, he heard her weep as she pressed her face against his shoulder and held onto him for dear life. He didn't understand where her sudden fear came from or even what she was afraid of but it was clear that whatever it had been had ingrained itself into her brain.

She was afraid about him, for him. About what, he could only guess. But at the moment, as he repeated those same words to calm her down, what mattered to him was to get her better, to reassure her that he was fine.

That he would be fine. That nothing that she had dreamt of would happen because it had just been that: a dream. A really, really bad dream.

* * *

 _Cael of_ _Ériu. Ceara of Ériu._

An empty grave beside an incorrectly engraved one.

That's all that stood near the shores of Shika were the waves could lap at them. The rise and slight beating of the waves had corroded some of the stone from each but besides that neither had suffered much deterioration. For them being over a decade old, Masami found it shocking.

One bore the name of a man she once knew—loved even—the other the name of a little girl that still breathed and lived when she wasn't supposed to.

"That there grave is where her remains are."

Masami didn't want to look at the young man that had guided her there but something in her compelled her to. His face hooded behind a dark cloaked, all she could see even in the bright daylight were strands of dark gold as they peeked from underneath it while the ends of a long plait of the same color ended near his legs. What she could see of his hair and the odd attire he wore told her that he was no native of the Kou Empire, a traveler perhaps, and it certainly made it that much stranger that he knew where these graves were—and most importantly who they belonged to.

"How can I trust your word?" Masami asked. After all, this stranger had met her just outside her family's estate claiming to know where the remains of two beloved people of hers rested.

"The same reason why you followed me here, little miss," he commented, stretching his arms to either side and shrugging.

The same reason… That in itself was shady as well. The only reason she had followed him to these graves out in the shores of her town was because he had explicitly claimed that he knew of where a little lamb had buried her sister. The exchange had happened away from prying ears but it had been enough to pique her interest. At first she hadn't believed him—still didn't; even though the construction of their new estate had been elsewhere, the grounds of the fire had been left undisturbed as tribute to those who had died. How could have anyone, especially _she_ , known where Kohaku's remains had been when everything had been burned to the ground.

"How did she find them?" Masami asked instead.

"Same way she was able to talk to the girl," the man explained falling a few feet behind her to watch the sea instead. "The djinn allowed her to talk to her and from there they found where what remained of her laid. What they could find she buried here along with what remained of her brother's belongings." He tapped against his head and chuckled, "Except that hairpin, of course. There's no way she'd part with that."

Gritting her teeth, Masami couldn't keep the anger and grief that overwhelmed her ultimately making her drop to her knees before the graves. She abhorred the name engraved on it but she loved both of the people that rested in them.

"What a thief, really," the man said coming closer and patting Masami on the back. Flinching at the sudden touch and moving away, he didn't seem to take it personally and instead crouched down with his arms leaning against his knees and his hands cradling his chin. Being this close, Masami could see the fair complexion of his skin marred by burn scars that ran down his neck and underneath his cloak. A sly yet gentle smile laid on his lips as he stared at the grave marked with the woman's name. "She was the reason why your beloved worked so hard to fight in the war and what ultimately caused him his death, she was the one that killed your sister, and she still lives. Pitiful, really, that things never change."

"Why show me this?" she asked, voice hoarse from the sobbing that wanted to be let out. "What do you even want?"

"To help, miss." He stood and stretched as if nothing was wrong with the world. "You see there's a lot of wrong happening in the world and a lot of people are trying to right it. I'm one of those people. And I've come from a very far away place to rectify those wrongs. And that one—" he pointed at Ceara's grave, "is a mistake I'm responsible for."

"What are you going to do to her?"

"What I have to," he said rather cryptically. "But it's not a job that I _have_ to do with my own hands. So long as the job gets done, it's a win for me. Which is why I've come with a proposition." Having Masami's attention there, she turned up to glance up from beneath. As the sun hit him from above, a crude shadow came over his features darkening his golden tresses and letting a small amethyst sheen come from his eyes. From beneath the folds of his cloak, he took out a vial with bright purple liquid inside and showed it to her. "I hear you're a connoisseur of fine poisons. This one here is Brugmansia, a bloom that grows in the Dark Continent."

Dark Continent. She had heard of that place and of the rarities that bloomed in its soils. Things never before seen in any other part of the continent, east or west. But to actually have a sample that had been carefully and correctly extracted was hard to believe.

"Don't worry," he assured letting the bottle sit before her on the ground. "The one who extracted the poison is more than an artisan on her line of work. I assure you that this is one of the finest poisons known to mankind: it's fast when applied directly, gives hallucinations with bouts of pain, and it's hard as hell to detect and even harder to extract even with magic. It's one of the ones that were used to tranquilize Fanalis back when they were commonly hunted. It wouldn't kill a Fanalis but it would certainly do in a human with the right amount. And what's more it'd be a torturous and painful experience."

"What do you want in exchange?" she asked.

"Just one thing," he said stepping back as he started to walk away from her. "Make sure the job is done. I'm sure you'll have no problem with that, Reizei Masami."

She didn't bother with him after that. The man had just left the vial there. It was enough for her. She didn't care who he was or why he wanted her to do it, so long as she could it would suffice.

 _You can't kill her yet._

After seeing this, how a shallow grave was all that marked Kohaku's remains without even her name, was enough for her to think otherwise. She would deal with the consequences of her actions but all what she wanted now was for the girl who caused all this tragedy to pay for it.

 _And she will._

Without a second thought, she grabbed the vial and stood to turn and leave. The trip to Balbadd would take long but it would be worth it in the end. She would be sure to make it so.

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _I told myself I wouldn't upload. I have so much stuff that needs to be done besides school work. Seriously, take some advice and try to lease apartments during summer time and don't deal with this crap of having to move out the weekend before finals week T.T Anyway, rant over. I really didn't intend to upload this. I was going to let it sit for until after everything calmed down, or when I had a little bit of time, but I just really wanted to put this out._

 _This and the next chapter have been sitting in my google docs for about 2 weeks now with the last having barely been done about two days ago. I won't be uploading that anytime soon (at least I hope I can keep myself in check till then) but hopefully this won't be a month long wait either. I have lots of stuff I need to do and not to mention that I want to write and upload for another story that I have been sorely neglecting because of how much work I've been putting into this one cx No regrets though. Certainly not, just sad that I can't get inspired for the other one._

 _Anyway, I'd like to announce one thing before I give my thanks and everything. Recently, I created a twitter account specifically connected to this writing account. I tend to disappear from the radar at times and that tends to lead some people to ask about me. I love you all who do that :) But I realized that maybe twitter would be a better way to keep you guys updated with what's happened with the stories I'm working on and just random stuff that I tweet. And, well, if any of you are interested just search for xkeyoftheabyssx (Evie)._

 _Now let's talk a little about this chapter that brought some little things into play. Some tiny things won't be really talked about in this story—they're hints that link into this overall three story series (maybe four) that I want to do. They're all independent of each other but they will be connected. Two, which includes Silent Lamb, have mostly been thought out, like about 85%. The other two...not soooo much. But that's for the future. If you don't like that sort of thing, that's fine too. All these stories will be their own thing, just interconnected in parts. The one thing that will appear more is the mystery blonde man that 'helped' Masami during the end of this chapter. He will be prominent in all stories and he will surely appear in the future of this one (and ya'll thought I was done, pfft)._

 _Now let's give some thanks to the wonderful people that have Favorited and Followed:  
_ ** _-pemberleys  
_** ** _-SpicyCrazyLove2013  
_** ** _-Green. Piratee  
_** **-Drake-Seriel  
** **-COLORLESS. LYFE  
** ** _-Wydven  
_** ** _-Kororo-pudding_**

 _And now, seeing as it's 2:30 am, I think it is time I retire. I will start focusing on the other story but I won't wholly stop working on this one. Just like I've been writing on the bus ride to school or between classes, I'll find a way to work on it -w- For now, I hope you enjoyed the long (-w-) chapter and stay tuned for the next update!_


	11. Silencing the Lamb

_**Chapter Eleven:**_

 _Silencing the Lamb_

* * *

" _You hear that, Speirr?"_

" _Nope," Ceara called out making Cael laugh at her blatant reply. As they sat near the shores of Shika, the young boy of eleven sat fishing for sport while his baby sister ran and jumped around playing with the coming and going of the waters. Chuckling at her brother's giddiness, the little girl ran off to be closer to the waves as they washed to shore tiny bits of shells and smaller crabs. Barely four, Ceara really liked her fishing trips with her brother, especially because she got to pick up pretty shells that their father would make into necklaces or earrings whenever he returned from any military expeditions._

 _As tiny of a fishing city as it was, Shika had good natural borders that allowed it to be well protected from attacks and gave it purpose as a base to attack the Kou and Gai kingdoms further northeast. Despite knowing how on edge all was, the Ériu siblings knew happiness and some semblance of peace within each other's company. So Cael found himself with no qualms as he watched Ceara from his sit while she ran around picking shells or starfish into her dress skirt to bring them back to him._

 _Wanting to continue his previous conversation, Cael patted her head to get her attention before throwing out his line far towards the bright blue sea. "You don't hear the sound that life makes?"_

" _You say funny things, Cae-nii!" Ceara giggled before shoving a starfish into Cael's lap. The poor boy, despite his age, didn't like the crusty feel of the animal and cringed but didn't remove it as Ceara kept piling more of her findings into his lap._

" _They're not funny, they're true," he countered with a nervous chuckle as Ceara laid a seaweed around his ankle._

" _What do you hear?" she asked genuinely curious and turning to face him with a tilt of her head, her total attention on him._

 _Bright blue eyes like the ocean itself stared back at her stark ones before he replied. "Some...thing. It's not wind or the waves crashing onto the sand. Close your eyes, Ceara and listen." Obliging to her brother's request, the little girl shut her eyes tightly, making her nose scrunching up in the effort. "Now tell me what you hear."_

" _Waves."_

" _What else?"_

" _The people, the wind. Oh, and my tummy rumbling!"_

 _Cael chuckled but remained somewhat serious as he asked again. "Anything else?"_

" _...I don't think so."_

" _Focus," he added fervently. "Don't pay attention to what you normally hear. When you do that, what do you hear?"_

 _Ceara scrunched her nose more, a bit confused but did as she was told. Soon enough the different sounds she heard before faded into the background. Before she knew it, all she heard was nothing until the smallest of chirps came to her ears. She gasped, her eyes snapping open as more of those noises flushed through her eager eardrums._

" _Birdies chirp-chirping! But not normal birdies."_

 _Cael smiled. "It's soft and light, isn't it?"_

" _Like fluffy almond cakes!" Ceara added with a gleeful grin._

" _Sure, fluffy almond cakes," Cael agreed and sat back as he plunged the end of his fishing rod into the sand. "But you can hear it, can't you?"_

" _Mm. What is it, Cael?"_

" _I don't know," he admitted. "But mama could hear it too. Said it sounded like many birds flying about and chirping happily around everybody."_

" _Can people hear it?"_

" _No, Speirr. Not everybody. It's rare."_

" _Rare?"_

" _It's...special," he said, trying to find a good word. "There are special people who see and hear what the world's made of—those same birds you hear," Cael explained. Having read so much about mythical beings and magic, he knew some things about the subject. Enough, at least, to try to explain to her what he and their mother had been so attuned to. "But you don't see lots of those people around here."_

" _Why?"_

" _I don't know, actually," he said with a small smile. "What I do know is that it's a special gift from god."_

" _Do we have that gift too?" Ceara asked, curious._

" _No," Cael replied with a wry smile. "Only those that can see it have a special gift. We can just hear it."_

" _Oh," Ceara answered a bit unamused by such blatant and anticlimactic answer. At least that had been what Cael thought until a bright grin came to Ceara's face. "Well that's okay! The birdies sound very nice. It's like they're singing!"_

" _It's a pretty song, huh?" he asked to which Ceara only nodded, enthused. Going away to pick up more shells, Ceara ran back and forth trying to pick the prettier ones as they came to shore and before the bigger waves took them away._

 _As the sunset came and their excursion would soon end, Cael watched as Ceara came with her last batch of findings. Her tiny hands held a sand dollar and inspected it. After a moment, though, she stopped and watched the air around them._

 _Curious, Cael asked her what was wrong to which she answered, "Does mama hear us from heaven like we hear the birdies?"_

 _The sudden question caught him off guard but he reached out his hand to her which she took to mean that he wanted a hug. Letting go of the sand dollar, she jumped in to sit on his lap as they watched the sun fall signaling their time to leave for home. "She always told me about how pretty the birds' singing sounded to her and that she always thought how our laughter reminded her of their singing. So, yeah, I'm sure she can hear us. If she could hear the birds from here, surely, from where she is, she can hear us."_

" _That's good," Ceara muttered before taking a deep breath and cupping her hands against her mouth, "We're okay, mama! Cae-nii, Papa, and Speirr too! We're happy together, so no worries!"_

" _Yeah," Cael hummed, holding Ceara from behind in a hug and making his sister laugh giddily. "We're okay. And we're always going to be. So long as we're together and have each other, we'll be fine."_

" _You'll always be with Speirr, right Cae-nii?" she asked turning her head up to face him._

" _Always," he answered and planted a kiss on her forehead. "And even if I'm not, I'll be like mama and always hear you and be with you even if you can't see me. No matter what."_

* * *

 _Cael._

Ceara tightened her grip on the tautness that she had her arms wrapped around. It felt warm, comfortable, familiar, and it beckoned her, making her curl and bury her face against it. Doing so, she inhaled deeply feeling strangely calm but finding no smell of the salty sea or Cael's scent of mint and dirt. Instead what calmed her was the scent of the earth, the small sweetness of almonds— _vanilla?_ — and the slight hint of spices. To her mind it was an odd combination—all three infused into one another almost equally—but nonetheless it infused some kind of serenity that she couldn't discern but appreciated very much.

As she buried her face in further to relish in the comfortable space that lulled her on, a sudden tug of what she held broke her out of her sleep for a second. A couple more finally got her to wake up and she slowly released what she had from her arms and instead grasped at the ends of it tightly with her hands.

Ceara buried her face a couple seconds more before groggily opening her eyes and looking up at the deep voice that came to her ears. "Good, you're awake."

"Mm…" It wasn't really an answer since she hadn't really registered what had been said. But as she began to wake fully, she noted the deep stare from red irises that bore into her own.

 _Red? No, crimson...and gold._

"...Kouen?"

"Obviously," he replied with a small sigh as his gaze left her to stare down at whatever he held in his lap.

"What are you doing…" she muttered with a yawn she covered with one hand before continuing. "...my room?"

"Yours?" A small scoff escaped him but he didn't tear his eyes away from what she now recognized to be a scroll on the hollow between crossed legs. "You are still half asleep, it seems. We're in the study."

"...stu…" Words failed her, so instead her eyes scanned the room. Instead of finding the silks and vibrant colors of her room as she had come to expect, Ceara saw nothing but shelves upon shelves of scrolls and bound books from all corners of the world. Oh.

 _His study._ _Why…?_

"How…?" she asked but began remembering in the middle of her question. Food—dinner with Kougyoku. Not only her though; Kouen and Koumei went too. Kouen wanted to talk and they came here. They talked—he kept talking and she…

"I fell—"

"Asleep," Kouen finished for her. The out of the blue comment made Ceara turn to him but instead got distracted by her hands still holding the sleeve of his robes firmly in her grip.

"Oh," is all her brain could come up with as she let go and brought her arm back to herself. "Sorry." Glancing behind her, she noticed that she sat with her back against the windowsill sit, the cushions tossed haphazardly about. One was behind her back and another between her legs and she saw a couple cushioning Kouen as he sat beside her while the rest laid where they might have fallen. Leaning against her hands, Ceara was surprised to feel a soft woolen quilt pooled beneath her. It matched the cushions. "What's with...all this?"

"You wouldn't let go," he simply said and sighed tiredly as he let his scroll rest against his lap to roll his neck back and forth. Ceara cringe at the small yet audible popping she heard coming right next to her ear. "I had to improvise for both of our conveniences."

"Wouldn't let…" Ceara groaned and rubbed at her eyes. Oddly enough, she didn't feel them as itchy as last night but they still felt heavy. But her body and head didn't ache; all that was left was a sense of rest. At recognizing that sensation, she also recognized the reason for it. "I slept through the night?"

"Almost," he corrected as he began to roll the scrolls closed. "You had fits through the night. But that's here nor there. It's almost noon and—"

"Noon?!"

The shriek Ceara let out made Kouen flinch as she jumped up to stand and turn fully to the window. Just as he said, the sun was high in the sky illuminating everything in sight. Even from outside, the heat of Balbadd's spring could be felt and it only assured her of the time it was.

Time. So much lost time that she should have been working to fix things was lost. She groaned and turned on her heels ready to leave. Halfway through the study she skidded to a stop and bounced back around just as Kouen stood up and rolled the rest of his sore muscles. He'd stayed there— _with me—_ the whole of last night most likely in uncomfortable positions. He'd lost hours of work just like she had and his weren't any less important than hers _—some would argue the contrary even_.And here he stayed all the same.

Trotting back to his side, Ceara bent down and began helping him clean the mess that she had made by falling asleep there. Her mind wandered a bit on how she'd ended up near the windowsill or how she wound up having held him as she slept— _embarrassing as that thought is_ —but her hurry quickly raced the thoughts away. There wasn't time to waste for either of them. More in a hurry that he seemed to be, Ceara helped put most of the scrolls onto his desk and put together the windowsill sit more or less how it had been when Kouen waved at her dismissively.

"Go."

"Yes. Sorry about this," she said with a small bow before trotting away, holding her white hanfu that was now wrinkled and somewhat dirty. Another thought entered her busy mind that made her turn one last time and walk to stand before Kouen as he stood in front of his desk. Having to look up to meet his gaze, Ceara took what her mind thought up and spoke without filtering through first. "Thank you for talking to me when you're this busy and for not waking me when you should have."

"I didn't have—"

"I know," she agreed unable to stop herself. "Which is exactly why I'm saying this. You did it when you didn't have to and it ended up becoming a nuisance. It was kind of you—what I'm trying to say is that I'm really grateful, so just say 'you're welcome' so we can both go on and salvage what we can of the day."

The words made his eyes slightly widen but he hid it pretty well before nodding. "You're welcome."

"I'll be leaving now," she declared, still in the same hurry as before. Picking the skirts of her hanfu, she jogged out of the study and straight to her quarters where her handmaidens and Seijin were already in wait. No one, not even the guards that met her outside her room to let her in, was shocked at her late appearance or the absence of her throughout the night.

After she bathed and as the girls helped her get ready for the rest of what would surely be a busy day, Seijin kept telling her each and every idea he had come up with through the night and that morning about their predicament with the orphan houses and the status of the memoirs. The memoirs weren't in much peril—some soldiers were refusing their inclusion due to gossip but after encouragement from others, as per Seijin's accounts, they had willingly given their narratives.

"Are you sure it was willingly?" she asked as she waved away a couple of handmaidens. The young girls wanted to put her hanfu a certain way, something that she could guess was fashionable nowadays, but Ceara had grown accustomed of dressing herself and Kohaku a certain way. It had stuck after doing it for so long and felt more comfortable that way.

"Yes," Seijin assured with a flap of his quill in her general direction. The poor boy had his back to her only because they had been talking all through the expanse of her bath and her getting dressed. Despite the embarrassment and bashfulness of his, he was professional enough to know that they had a limited number of hours in a day and that their problems needed to be fixed quickly and efficiently. "I myself made certain of that. Went and triple-checked."

"I believe you," she said as the handmaidens pestered her with what she would like to eat. She asked for whatever would be easiest for them and as soon as they were gone, she turned to Seijin. "The houses' financial problems: what other ideas did you come up with?"

Seijin promptly began naming them off, each and every one in detail, but even after a couple more hours debating his ideas and whatever she managed to come up with on the spot, there was nothing better on the table. Every one of their plans came with a downside that would affect the houses negatively. Even when she also suffered loses, the orphan houses seemed to suffer greater ones.

"There has to be a way," she muttered tapping her red feathered pen against the papers full of scratched out numbers and words.

"Maybe relocate them to Shika and Rakushou?" Seijin suggested.

"No," Ceara replied, quickly shutting that down. "Shika is full and renovations will cost more. Even the ones in Rakushou are undergoing reconstruction after some damages they endured from the last storm that hit the city a few weeks ago." She stood and leaned against her desk, tapping the end of Beleth's Metal Vessel against the paper and letting the ink taint it more. Her eyes peered the paper as if some answer would magically appear but she knew none would. Not now at least with how they were. With a heavy sigh, Ceara smiled and lifted her gaze to meet Seijin's. "Go rest, Jin."

"Young miss?"

"You've been up all night, haven't you?" she asked. The boy didn't respond but he didn't need to. The dark circles underneath his eyes and the fact that he had come up with enough ideas to last them hours said enough about his work ethics.

"But you need help."

"Not at the expense of your health, I don't," she argued and smiled. "Go sleep. And when you wake up, go eat and take the rest of today off. You're done for the day. I'll continue with this and we can reconvene the brainstorming session tomorrow."

"Morning or afternoon?" he asked.

"I'll be sure to be up by morning, don't worry." Ceara dismissed him with a wave of her hand. "Thank you, Jin. Now go rest. It's enough with one of us half here and half asleep."

A small scoff escaped him but he nodded, any qualm of his having been pushed aside by those last words. "Then I'll see you later, young miss."

"Rest well, Seijin. You did good today."

* * *

The young boy was restless as more days went by and they seemed nowhere closer to solving their problems. Despite his master's best efforts to calm his rising anxieties of what they were facing, he could see how much of a toll everything was having on her and how unbalanced her recovery from whatever had happened in Magnostadt was.

Seijin wasn't blind or deaf; he knew something wasn't right and could see the highs and lows that his master was undergoing after a couple of weeks came and went.

The young vassal knew the young miss for the bright and easy going person he'd come to know, the same one that had taken him in almost a year ago; that side of her had become quite scarce, however, after the day she had been away in Magnostadt fighting and only seemed to come exclusively for certain things. Despite her ban from contact with the Imperial family of which he had been informed of upon their arrival, the young miss didn't seem too bothered by it. As it was, the ban was seamlessly falling out on its own the more time she spent talking with the First Prince, almost completely disappearing as time went by. Now, she could spend time with the Eighth Princess which actually seemed to help with her sleepless nights and bouts of starvation he had seen her have. Not only that but she had just recently been allowed contact with her own family after they had left for the Tenzen Plains. Her sending letters back and forth helped her mental health that he'd seen crumble at times. He managed the delivery of them through the magicians' court—aside from contact with her siblings, though, he also saw letters to the Third Prince and even to the Fourth. At first, only a few responses came from the latter two. After a while, Prince Kouha came to respond whenever she would write him but in the same span, Prince Hakuryuu's correspondence ended rather abruptly. Seijin noted her worried look when it stopped but didn't question it.

Times like those made her seem almost like before, normal. But that seemed to completely change on a dime at times, too; those were the lows he saw.

Those were the times when she was a bundle of nerves from her work or otherwise, the times when sleeping spells overtook her and rendered her helpless for a couple hours of the day. Times when she declined Kougyoku on her invitations to eat, and times when she would work through the night and into the morning. Time when she spent nights at the First Prince's study only to arrive later in the day where Seijin and she would work tirelessly through what hours they had left of the day. She looked rested but struggled to keep focus on a single subject without properly being reminded of it every so often. Her mind was scattered, it seemed to him, struggling to decide what needed her attention most.

Seeing her like that made his worry grow bigger than he could manage. Seijin was glad that he could at least voice these worries to someone that could actually do something about them.

"Anything else?" Kouen asked once the young boy was done explaining all he had witnessed of his master in the last couple of weeks. Prince Koumei stood by his brother's side as the two listened to what he had to say about his master. Seijin didn't particularly like the fact that he had accepted to be their informant on what the young miss did but he also knew there was no room for objections. All the same, however, he knew when things were better off left unsaid—specifically her correspondence with Prince Hakuryuu.

"Nothing else worth mentioning, your highness," Seijin stated, not technically lying. "Her work and meetings with your highness have taken the whole of her days and the young miss seems to be struggling to keep up with maintaining her personal health as it is. It is worrisome to say the least."

"What work exactly?" Koumei asked. The young vassal eyed the second prince for a brief second. Prince Koumei had once been quite close to Seijin's master but just like many things after Magnostadt, their relationship of tutor and student had deteriorated in the span of a short day.

"Of the Reizei Household," Seijin replied. Again not technically a lie. What she did consisted of helping the people of Shika and those of Rakushou and Balbadd which she did through her status as the second daughter of the Reizei Household and successor of the Southern Army General. "Because the young master is away and Lady Masami is coming to Balbadd to see her family, Shika and the subsidies that were given to the family after the Master's death were given to her and she has had her hands full dealing with them."

A quiet came over the council room that Seijin didn't like at all. Thankfully, it wasn't anything foreboding like he had thought. They believed his word and Prince Kouen promptly dismissed him. Seijin excused himself and was about to walk out of the room when he noticed the time of day—afternoon. His master had said she would have lunch with the young princess: today would be a high. But it wouldn't last long, of that he was sure. After all she had explicitly taken Princess Kougyoku on her offer for lunch because she wanted to spend more time brainstorming in the evening. But after weeks of doing it, he was beginning to see how even their conjoined ideas were becoming quickly exhausted.

There were few things left to explore but he doubted any would reach the expectations she had for the houses. And despite her wish to keep the government out of these specific matters, Seijin knew when he was facing a losing battle. She would need help other than his. Help that could actually do something of value.

Turning towards them, Seijin caught the puzzled look of Prince Koumei and the raised eyebrow of Prince Kouen. It was frightening and unnerving to ask something of them, especially when his status was nothing in their eyes. But if this could ameliorate his master's struggles then he would risk the punishment for insubordination.

"Was there anything else you had to say?" Prince Koumei inquired.

"No," he confessed and quickly spoke before fear could strangle him to silence. "But there is something I would like to ask for my master."

"What about her?" Kouen asked.

 _She will hate me for this._ But if it helped…

"Her work—it's more personal for her than I first led on. It's in jeopardy of being halted and we are running out of ideas to keep it afloat."

"What exactly are you asking?" Koumei inquired seemingly peeved at his roundabout speech.

Seijin took a deep breath before he let it all out, "For help."

* * *

A month had run by in a flash for Ceara and it had been more hectic than she could have ever imagined it could be. The whole of it had been so inconsistent without a routine, more of a go-with-the-flow agenda with every day to day. The idea of such irregularities had wrecked havoc on her health but few things salvaged her decaying mind.

Talking being a major part of what did. Ceara talked to whomever she could about mindless things to ease herself into the idea of merely talking. Mostly, though, talking to Kougyoku and sending letters back and forth between Kouha and Hakuryuu and the twins helped. But because of how little Kougyoku knew—how little Ceara had been able to tell her with what courage she could muster to do it—they could only help so much. What did most of the heavy lifting in helping her get more acquainted with her issues and in finding some kind of a solution was talking with Kouen. He was the only one who knew it all and was actively helping her find a solution.

Despite their time restraint, Ceara could tell he was trying his hardest to meet with her at least every other day to speak and if he couldn't afford to give her time, then every evening after dinner. Slowly but surely, Ceara could feel herself becoming comfortable with the idea of her shortcomings. And although she knew she would never truly be prepared to what the twins' reaction would be, she was assured, at the very least, that she wasn't going to face this alone.

For all the good it was doing, she could tell that working so hard on her mental health had cost her great time that she could have used to work on the issues that had cropped up over the weeks on her personal projects. The Balbadd house remained unbuilt with no resources or capital to built it with, and the houses in Shika and Rakushou weren't better with how the recent storms had hit them. Over the weeks, though, the orphan houses weren't the only thing being threatened to collapse if something wasn't done. Her memoir as well had began to suffer because of the people. Gossip had traveled fast from within Balbadd's palace walls to the soldiers and even back to Rakushou. Soldiers, veterans, and even families of the deceased had began questioning what her real intentions with their accounts were. More blatantly, some had even accused her of being a spy for the Imperial family against the common people—her ultimate goal to obtain any information of insurgent activity within the military under the guise of a memoir.

The idea sounded ludicrous even to her.

 _People's minds can be so easily manipulated by false information._ And it seemed that it was false information and gossip that spread the fastest.

That's why she had announced a few days ago that there would be a gathering for the Kou soldiers stationed in Balbadd, to any and all Kou citizen in Balbadd's soil interested actually, in order to fully disclose what her intentions were with their accounts and the future of the orphan houses stationed over their eastern cities. She and Seijin had worked on a memorandum to convince them to show to the meeting by promising to answer any and all questions they would have concerning the projects she had started with their help. She hoped that by being inclusive of their worries and doubts that she would be able to dispel them with the truth.

" _And the truth is the right answer, my king,"_ Beleth assured her as she dressed for the afternoon meeting she had set. Because she anticipated that many would attend, it would be held in the training grounds near the barracks were a crowd could be held without calling much attention. Many a crowd often came and went to the training grounds of the foot soldiers, so she hoped to not bring any unnecessary attention from political officials with the location. _"You have worked endlessly this past month learning this. Surely it will show."_

" _They will listen for sure,"_ Marbas added with a gleeful snort. _"You're way too passionate to not be sincere about it!"_

As she dressed in a simple blue and white hanfu, she felt Murmur's warmth as she reached down to her hairpin to place in her hair. _"They're right, little one. Once they hear you, they shall understand. Sincerity is much too blatant in your words where this is concerned."_

Ceara knew they were right because that was exactly what she felt. She had worked hard even before all this to make these projects work. Selfishly as they had started, they had evolved to mean something to her and she wouldn't let them fall apart. Not without a fight.

Before he even entered, Ceara heard Seijin approach her door, knock and enter after she had acknowledge him. The young boy smiled telling her that everything was ready and that people had already began to show, filling the unused training grounds almost immediately.

"It worked," he said, brushing a hand through his golden locks and sweeping them back. Dark mossy green eyes stared back at her and she noted some sort of nervousness in his gaze. "They're here."

"And we will give our piece," she said with a smile, patting him on the shoulder to assure him as they exited her room. The detail she had grown to expect waited outside to no surprise.

The maids hid their faces behind their sleeves and averted their gazes while the guards attempted to look as presentable as they could before speaking. "We would like to attend, General. All of us, if you would so allow it."

Ceara smiled and nodded. "My invitation was to all who wanted to listen; if you are willing, then you have no reason to ask." With that she walked past them with Seijin close behind her. Soon after, she began hearing the tapping of their feet as they followed them to the barracks and into the training grounds.

The sight she saw before her at entering was unnerving to say the least. As soon as she stepped into the building, the room became quiet, any noise rushing out like a wave leaving shore. The people parted ways giving her ample of room to walk to the forefront were a small area was cleared for her on the second floor balconies which were used for overwatching the training of others. Once there, Ceara gave herself a second in order to acclimate and look over the crowd she had gathered with a simple notice: soldiers and citizens alike had come, even citizens originally from Balbadd.

Because she wanted her memoir to include as much of the history of their soldiers as it could, she had begun to spread her search for stories further than just Kou military. After her arrival to the capital almost over a year ago, her interest and curiosity had been piqued because of the different arrays of soldiers that had come to be that she wasn't aware of. From Kouha's magic unit and vanguard, to Hakuei's entire Kouga Clan Household, Ceara realized that a military's history spanned to more than just its own soldiers. It also included those who joined after the fact because they saw value in their cause. Those people were there too, curious and wanting their doubts and questions answered.

 _And I'll try my hardest to do that._

"It pleases me that so many of you have willingly come here at my request." She didn't give herself time to hesitate and began with a voice that spoke over all the crowd. Despite her nervousness, she knew that they deserved to be heard. Most of all, she wanted to listen and be heard all the same. "I won't dawdle; you all came here for a reason. Be it curiosity or doubt, you are here to be heard as am I. And if you will allow me to speak, I can assure you it will be succinct. So I ask, will you allow me the first word?"

She awaited for a moment and found many heads nodding, some verbally telling her to speak. Ceara took a deep breath before she continued. "All that you have heard—all the gossip that has been spreading the past month—I assure you none of it is true. Although I can see how my word would be the least believable in this kind of situation, I wish for you to at least listen. The reason I search for all of your accounts—from soldiers, their families, and those who have survived—is because I wish for your story to be told."

Disharmonious whispers began to spread like wildfire. They were quiet but she could discern nothing because of their sheer amount. Instead she quieted them as she went on, "I know what you go through—how you lose husbands, fathers, brothers, cousins, and sons to a war and cause the Imperial family started and to which my own family is a part of. A war for unity, for peace. But that is not what drives me to do this; what does is seeing how those same husbands, fathers, brothers, cousins, and sons remain unnamed, their efforts and deaths left to fade away with time. I have witnessed soldiers accomplish astounding feats of bravery, camaraderie, and selflessness. All for a better future for their country and for their loved ones. They fight for a purpose, one that I have seen lost one too many times, never to be seen again. And I am ashamed to say that I have forgotten many who have helped me, many who have sacrificed themselves because they believed in me and I couldn't live up to their expectations."

The hold she had on the railings in front of her tightened, her knuckles turning white at remembering a certain battle. "Almost a year ago, I committed one of the biggest mistakes I could ever have done as a general: my inadequacies, inexperience, and ultimately my recklessness resulted in the loss of many great soldiers. Soldiers who trusted me with their lives; soldiers whose families may even be among you today." A few muffled cries reached her and it made Ceara stop for a brief second to search the crowd. But even doing so proved useless. She couldn't see any faces she recognized at first glance. But knowing they were there helped make it real. "Families whom I have reached to so that they could tell the story of their loved ones. I have reached to those who are still fighting and to those who have fought because I know that no one deserves to disappear. I don't wish for their efforts, for yours, for anybody's, to be lost without recognition. I want for future generations to know that the peace that will come to be, the peace they live in, came to be not just because of a handful of great, powerful leaders. No, I want them to realize that it came to be because those leaders joined together with the people in their country. That it was the people themselves that fought valiantly and ceaselessly and united for that future. That all of you here, those who have passed, and those to come matter."

 _We matter._

"You matter," she repeated louder, letting her voice resound through the crowded room. "And I want the world and all to know your stories. We may not choose who lives or who dies, but we can make sure they are all remembered. And I know for a fact that this isn't a job I can do alone. Far from it. This is something that I need all of your help in which is why I ask of you to stand united to help me. Together we can create the narrative of a century for generations to come. Together we can make sure no one disappears from history ever again. And I won't let anybody erase what we will create. No matter what I have to do, I won't let anybody else's existence fade away or be forgotten."

 _This is why Kouen and Koumei are wrong. Rewriting history and letting all that ever happened be erased...is wrong. I know that neither of them will agree. But that's okay._

 _So that people like my father, like Cael, like Kohaku will never be forgotten, I will go against what you believe. Everybody needs to know the truth—I know that now—and I can show them, teach them, how to never let their memory fade away._

There was silence for a brief second. Abruptly, a couple of soldiers, ones Ceara recognized from the detail that had been assigned to her, shouted their agreement, telling her to tell their story. More voices joined, the crowd soon shouting in unison the three words, the noise hurting her sensitive ears. She didn't care for the pain though. It gladdened her way more that her words and sincerity had reached them. Her chest tightened from the happiness of having conveyed her thoughts to them, the reality of what she wanted to do being louder than the lies being spread.

But as she tried to quiet them down, she began hearing protests from others. These protests grew in volume the same way the cheering had before it. Soon the two opposing sides began arguing amongst themselves and no matter what she did, they wouldn't cease their shouting.

"This is getting out of hand," Seijin shouted over the ruckus. Ceara nodded, having heard him over the ruckus even as she covered her aching ears.

Taking Beleth's Metal Vessel, she used some of his power to mimic the magic tools she had seen developed in Rakushou. Augmenting the vibrations for a broader range, she only needed to raise her voice a slight octave before telling them to stop. That itself was enough to silence them and get their attention back. Returning to her normal voice, she glanced down at the protesters and asked about their qualms. Many came at once but she managed to organize them as they each spoke in turn. She took their questions and did her best to answer them. To some she could easily answer, others not so much and she admitted that to them. Although some didn't like that she had no concrete answer to their questions, the majority understood that she wouldn't have an answer to everything. It helped make things easier that they were actually open to listen.

After a good half an hour of conversing with them, Ceara finally found herself confronted with one of the issues she truly had no answer to still.

"I've heard word of the orphan houses that you built in the cities of Shika and Rakushou." The statement had come from a young woman, one holding an even younger boy by the hand as she stood beside a group of women. From the looks of them, Ceara could tell they were those left helpless after their families had died. They were the widows, the orphans, the people she could most relate to and understand. The young woman shifted her weight between her feet anxiously before speaking again, "There were rumors of one establishing in Balbadd. Is that true? Are you going to help us too?"

Ceara smiled but she tried her best to hide the bitterness that she felt rise at hearing the girl's expectant voice. "I…"

 _Go with the truth for once._

"It's true that I wish to establish one here for those left without a place or family," she admitted but smiled wryly as she prolonged the words she didn't want to speak. "But as things stand now, I don't think—"

"As she stands now, her efforts alone will not enable her to build such institution."

All heads turned at the deep voice that Ceara knew all too well to not recognize. Lowering her head towards the entrance, she saw as the multitude of people she had brought together saluted and bowed behind them—some reluctantly, others with respect—to the opened doors of the training grounds. The crowd parted to allow both Kouen and Koumei passage to where she stood. As they climbed the stairs to the side of the balconies where she and Seijin were, Ceara couldn't keep her eyes from the two as they came to stand before her.

Kouen's gaze never left hers as they approached them while Koumei eyed the crowd that stood below them. Unable to understand, Ceara mouthed inconsistencies unable to make up her mind on what to say. As if entertained, Kouen scoffed and a guttural sound came from his throat that sounded akin to a cough. Hearing it, Ceara's brow furrowed recognizing that as his odd version of a chuckle. That itself made her snap out of her stupor and allowed her to focus on one single question.

"What are you doing here?"

The inquiry made him raise an eyebrow as he stood before herm making her crook her neck back to meet his piercing gaze. "As patron of this project of yours, I am allowed to join in on these meetings, aren't I?"

"Patron?" she repeated in a mutter, equal parts astounded and confused. Before he could answer, though, Seijin's let his voice rise above the confusion in spite of his stutter.

"P-Prince Kouen and Prince Koumei have agreed to fund the establishment of Balbadd's orphan house and to also help support the ones already built in Shika and Rakushou," he explained as he shifted his weight nervously on either foot.

"What?" she called out, furious at this. Turning to the young boy, he cowered and took a step back to avoid her anger. But he wasn't getting away that easily. "Explain yourself."

"Your vassal told us about your little 'plan,'" Koumei spoke, stepping forth from beside his brother and saving Seijin from having to explain in the process. "He also explained in detail about how you were suffering financially to support them."

"Suffering…" Ceara groaned and held the bridge of her nose to keep the headache from expanding further than her head. But it didn't matter now. Not when they knew and it had been her vassal who'd clearly told them. "Seijin, why?"

The blonde simply shifted on his feet before returning her gaze. She wasn't mad anymore; if anything, she was more disappointed that he failed to consult her before making such a rash deicision. There was a good reason why she had fought hard to keep this under wraps and away from the government. And he more than anybody understood that reason.

"I'm really sorry, young miss," he said, his cheeks slightly dusted pink in shame. "I know what you've always told me, but I couldn't bare seeing you struggle anymore. You worked too hard and spent too much time on this for it all to fall apart. I know this is the last thing you wanted but I saw no other way to help."

"I don't understand why you are making such a commotion about it," Kouen confessed with a long sigh. "This fixes the problems Seijin spoke of. It gives you liberty to focus on what is more important and that certainly lightens both our loads. Besides, this was explicitly and extensively conferred between Koumei a and myself. We both agreed this would not bring any trouble."

"This _is_ important," she corrected him still annoyed and slightly less angry than before. "It's because I know how governmentally run facilities function that I left this as an anonymous project. I know who you appoint and with what purpose they work for." And she absolutely didn't want old, aristocratic geezers that didn't care anything about the people to control what she had worked so hard for.

"Don't misinterpret," Koumei replied with a furrow of his brow. "My brother and king subjected me to reading through the instructions you proposed for this little project of yours and we arrived at a consensus. To give government officials power over a system you have carefully and diligently crafted would put it all to waste. My brother and king and I have agreed that it would be wiser to leave you as head developer instead."

"That's ludicrous," she mumbled under her breath unable to believe her problems could be solved to easily. "You're giving me resources and power even though—" Her lips pursed when her mind almost let some information slip through. "Even though you're aware of certain things, you're still willing to give me resources that amount to so much? I find that hard to believe."

"As do I," Koumei assured her with a sigh but the fact that his gaze averted to his side where Kouen stood told Ceara something about who'd actually made the decision on it. "But if my brother and king deems it harmless enough, then I have no reason to oppose."

 _Really? It's really..._ that _simple?_

"Young miss, they're waiting," Seijin's call made her turn about to see him as he stood over the railing to look down where the crowd had heard some of the exchange the four of them had had. It was clear that they had heard but it also seemed like they were awaiting for some kind of confirmation from her.

Ceara pursed her lips in an attempt to get time to think of what to say. After a couple of minutes, she turned to address the expectant crowd. "Their highnesses, Prince Kouen and Prince Koumei, as you have heard, have agreed to fund our efforts. His highness was correct, I alone cannot do this anymore. I have not the sufficient resources to do so. But with their help, it is possible still. With their help…" Her stark blue eyes came to the young woman from before as she and the little boy looked expectantly at her as if hanging by her every word.

She wondered if that was how she looked at Sousei and Suisei.

Shaking that thought away, she finished what she had started. "With their help, the facility that I initially intended to be built in Balbadd will happen." Almost in the fraction of a second it took for Ceara to say that, the faces of the women and children brighten. "And as I have given this personally to overlook, I will assure you that these facilities will be as well crafted as the main houses near and in the empire's capital. There will be no discrimination from me, that I can guarantee you."

Cheers rose from those same people and the soldiers from before joined them. It shocked her that this had gone as well as it had but she was nonetheless glad about the outcome. It had taken time but they understood. She smiled before addressing them one last time. "This will be a joint effort all the same. The memoirs can only come to be if I have your anecdotes. The houses will function under the management of volunteered caregivers. I can only provide the resources and methods, you all are the ones truly responsible for making such improbable idea come true. So let's continue helping each other to make all this a reality for our future."

For a brief second there was a quiet that sent chills down her spine as they all saluted her with a bow, citizens of Kou and Balbadd alike. It seemed like they found a common ground with her ideals, and Ceara only wanted it to remain as such. She could only do so much without their help. So long as they were willing, this would work like it had for so long.

With all she had wanted to say said, she dismissed the crowd. It wasn't until it had greatly dissipated that she saw Kouen and Koumei leave and head back to the palace. Calling Seijin to follow, the two went after them as they headed to Kouen's private study. Despite what had happened and the fact that she was grateful for their help, there was still a part of her that wanted answers.

Once they arrived and everyone came to a full stop—Koumei to the side of the desk where his brother sat and Seijin beside her as the two of them stood before their royalty—Ceara didn't hesitate to ask.

"Why are you doing this?"

"Again…" Kouen muttered unable to believe her obstinence at the subject. "Was the explanation given not enough?"

"No," she replied sincerely. "Especially when I know there would have to be a good reason for Koumei to agree to such lenient use of a part of Kou's economy." Having spent enough time with the second oldest prince to know, Ceara couldn't deny that it had been a little too easy for him to agree. Koumei, like Kouen, believed in practicality over sentimentality and sentimentality was the raw definition of her project. Hence it was understandable why she found it hard to believe he would agree so willingly to give up a quarter of a million huang to her cause.

"That my brother and king asked it of me is reason enough," Koumei corrected as he hid his lower face with his fan. "That you cannot understand such simple concept is beyond my powers to teach."

"Fine, mock me," Ceara called out with a furrowed brow. "But I want my answer: why are you helping me?"

"No specific reason that would make sense, of that I can assure you," Koumei answered with a heavy yawn that made him lower his fan. This made her groan since it wasn't an answer itself.

"You've had your time to ask questions," Kouen announced as that conversation quickly ended. "Now I have mine. Seeing as the Imperial family is endorsing this, I want to see for myself what kind of project you have seemingly undergone for the past two years."

She had no reason to answer when they themselves had not. But Ceara couldn't dismiss the fact that they had just financially saved something she was glad hadn't fallen into ruin. So instead of arguing like she usually would, she opted to give them the benefit of the doubt and answer instead. "All right, I'll yield. What is it you want to know?"

"Everything."

The answer itself made her groan in frustration but the logical part of her that knew him best told her that he wasn't kidding. On the contrary, actually. So instead she turned to Seijin but before she could ask anything, she stopped to look at the fidgety boy in front of her. He was a ball of nerves and it made her remember what he had done. Seijin, her vassal, had gone behind her back and done what she had explicitly asked him to never do.

 _And yet he saved my ass._

It proved her point from long ago: she was prone to err. She could see how her arrogance to fix this by herself could have come between the projects' original purpose to help. So instead of the scolding he was surely expecting, she raised her hand and patted his head before ruffling his hair. When the boy struggled to speak out of sheer confusion, Ceara chuckled and patted his head again.

"You did what you thought was best, Jin. It turns out you were right," she declared. "You did well. Now, it seems our patron wants to see our work so far. Would you go and retrieve everything we have?"

Seijin stared wide-eyed at her, his mossy green eyes unblinking until he recognized the pardon she'd given him. With a small grin, he nodded and left the room sprinting. Knowing that two years worth of work would take a long time to explain, she began taking armchairs and bringing them closer to the desk that she intended to use.

Offering one to Koumei, she saw him refrain from sitting and turned to him with pursed lips. "It's obvious that you still doubt me."

"With good reason, Ceara of Ériu," he answered straight away. He was never one to prattle, much less than his brother. "And with good reason. I have searched wide for any record of your existence."

"And you're vexed as to why any record of Ceara of Ériu ceases to exist about thirteen years back," she finished for him.

Of course it would be about that. Kouen sought out the truth personally when he couldn't find it—his approach was always more brusque and upfront. Koumei's was the complete opposite. He searched first on his own and confronted only if necessary which rarely happened since he had a gift for research. Ceara had always found it odd that the second prince could be so versatile with his resources; there was no question he could have that a mere search would not answer. Understanding that gave Ceara a good idea of what had him so irritated with her aside from her impersonation.

So instead of dawdling and giving him nothing, Ceara chose to give him what he asked for if he wanted it. "I did my best to make it like that. Marked the grave and all."

"I am aware," Koumei said as he tapped his chin with his fan. "The grave was found near the shores of Shika marked as 'Ceara of Ériu.' Tell me, are any real remains resting there or is it a mere vacant slot?"

"It has remains," she confessed with a shrug of her shoulders. "I scoured what was left of the fire after we returned to Shika. It wasn't much if anything really but I thought it would be better than an empty marked grave for her." Ceara turned to Kouen and gave him a half-crooked smile, "Couldn't help keep what I told you to yourself?"

"I don't keep secrets from him," Kouen told her certainly sounding genuien. "He knows what needs to be said and what should never be spoken of again. This is clearly the latter."

"I hope you can do so," Ceara said facing Koumei.

"I have no intentions of letting anything of what I was told be known." The second prince finally took a sit on his chair and languidly laid back as if overtly showcasing his exhaustion. "There would be no merit."

"I beg to differ," Ceara responded.

"Even if it did," Koumei corrected with a wave of his hand, "if my brother and king wishes for it to remain unsaid, then I will oblige. It's bothersome enough to know and have to keep it hidden; it's much easier if I just pretend I know nothing."

Ceara couldn't help but chuckle at that simple answer. He saw no merit in the knowledge he had of her, and even if he did, because of Kouen, he was willing to forget he knew anything at all. Truly, they were more united than they let on to be.

"Then I thank you regardless of your intentions," Ceara admitted. Her head slightly turned towards the doors as she heard the faint footsteps that were quickly approaching the study. "Really, Koumei, you have no idea what this means to me."

"I have some idea," he said and both he and Kouen turned to the doors as they opened. With the few seconds of privacy they had left, Koumei spoke the last piece of his mind where that whole ordeal was concerned. "And it is because I am aware of the context that I do this by choice, not just because my brother and king said not to."

There was nothing much she could do except smile. Despite how distant he had become, he was still the same. In spite of so much changing, not much really had. Just as that conversation was over, Seijin burst through the hallway that led to where they were while carrying in his arms the numerous scrolls and journals that logged her previous and their more recent records. Helping him set everything down and organize it the way she preferred it, she asked Seijin to join them as they all took a sit.

"Now," Ceara started with a clap of her hands. "Where do you want to begin?"

"Wherever it is you began," Kouen said and sat back ready to listen.

She chuckled and grabbed the scroll to the far left. Unfurling it, Ceara sat up to lay it before them so that she could explain as she went along the written lines. "This is what started it; these are the first records of the interviews I took in Shika about two years ago."

* * *

In spite of thinking it a childish and unnecessary task, Koumei had to admit that Ceara had done an impressive job at accounting for so many people, their whereabouts and statuses included, without anyone's help for the better part of two years. What she had accomplished over the short span of time was indeed plenty and she had worked to see that it all remained meticulously recorded. From teaching her before, Koumei had had some idea of her intellectual prowess but this showcased it at a level military and strategic education would never have done. Despite having started this during midday, she had gone on and on with the accounts giving brief summations of how, when, where, and who she interviewed. Koumei recognized names and places, some generals that had long retired, unable as they were to fight, while others were known military families that had lost part of said family to the wars. She had gone through centuries of their peoples' military generations with a fine comb, cataloging everything in a way she seemed to understand. Her young vassal seemed versed on the topics as well, giving his input where she failed to remember details written down. The two worked arduously to concise the information well for them without overwhelming them too much with unnecessary background.

Finding himself so entranced by the accounts, Koumei couldn't help but add his bits of knowledge about families she'd interviewed and about a few unknown or illegitimate children that she had not known of and had no records of. Whenever he pointed out any of this, she would excitedly forget for a moment what she was doing to jot down what he had said with her red feathered pen. Seijin had to snap her out of the small instances for her to return to explaining them just as vivaciously as before. Koumei found this exchange rather familiar and it wasn't until his brother began connecting the records to which wars and historic events the soldiers had spoken of that he understood why.

Ceara's enthusiasm for hearing people's life stories was just as bad as his brother's obsession with history. The only difference was that it looked to be more of a healthy joy for her. Then again, remembering that she did look worse for wear, maybe not.

Hours into the night, Koumei yawned and found Seijin doing the same and hiding it behind his hand. Seemed he wasn't the only one tired from this. Unlike his brother who kept on reading and unknowingly ignoring him, Ceara turned to Seijin and exhaled softly.

"Go rest, Jin," she told him. "We've worked enough on this for weeks now, so take tomorrow off as well."

"Are you sure?" he asked with a small rub of his eyes.

Ceara chuckled and nodded. The boy began reaching down for the scrolls they had already finished but she stopped him, telling him that she'd take care of everything and for him just to go rest. Gladly taking the offer, he excused himself and left the three of them. Wanting to rest as well, Koumei stood from his sit and got a small glance from the woman in their midst.

"It's late," he simply said as if that was enough of an excuse. Certainly was for him. "There's still preparations for the Summit meeting and a month has proven to go by quick. Work still needs to be done in the morrow, so I'll be leaving as well." Koumei eyed both of them and spoke to Kouen before leaving, "Be sure to rest as well. I would really appreciate a full night's sleep without having to come get you."

"I will," Kouen assured him with a dismissive wave of his hand. His brother was engrossed in the records enough to have completely missed Koumei's general direction but it was normal when he got like that.

When a small airy chuckle broke through the quiet, Koumei turned down to look at the young woman that sat beside his brother overlooking what he read. As if feeling his baring stare, Ceara lifted her head to look at him.

"Have a good night's rest, Koumei," she said with a small smile.

Even when he knew there was no trust he could give that would remain for long, a part of him still wanted to bestow some to her. It was the same part that had enjoyed their lessons and found promise in the woman that was a general of their army. And it was that same part that got him to reciprocate the gesture, bidding them both a good night before leaving the study.

And yet as he headed to his quarters, Koumei couldn't help but question and most of all wonder about many things.

Despite what his brother and king had chosen to do, Koumei still wondered why he chose to do it. When he had asked back when Seijin had come to them, Kouen had given a rather vague answer: there was no harm in helping her.

Was there really none, though? A person who had as much power as she had could have done plenty during the time her secret had remained as such. But surprisingly she had done nothing of the kind. Instead, she had focused her efforts on this, a scavenger hunt for the history of the people she encountered and found. In spite of the project having its roots in Kou territory, she had taken a more versatile and broad approach as she continued over the couple of years. What she had was a small but detailed history of what amounted to half of their world's culture—all of it through the interconnected stories of its people.

A young woman that had caused such devastation to a single family had done great things with what time life had given her. Great things, impressive even, but at the cost of someone she had treasured greatly. And from what his brother had insinuated perhaps even loved.

And his mind felt conflicted with all the information he had of her. From what he had gathered, Ceara of Ériu had accomplished little things in her short recorded lifetime. And that didn't account for the mass murder she caused as a child. As Reizei Kohaku, however, she was doing right for the people he and his brother often left to Kou's city officials. But, as his brother pointed out, names and status didn't matter. What she had done, she had done out of her own volition and judgment.

Actions spoke louder about a person's motives. And this woman, whether as Ceara or Kohaku, had swept into their lives with actions akin to the washing waves of the ocean. She had crept up to interact with them and ebbed away leaving impressions, marks on rocky shores.

Before and even after all this had been known, she had become a small part of their lives. Kougyoku and Kouha admired and liked her for who she was with them. Hakuryuu as well had seem to enjoy the company of one who didn't patronize him. Hakuei had found a kindred spirit who understood her familial affections. Their high priest even had found someone who wouldn't back down with his crude and overtly mischievous nature. Even Koumei had to admit that he had found someone he could converse with that would understand his point of view and even challenge his ideas with some of her own. She had the mind to disagree but an open enough mind to discuss it; at least now he understood how she was so good on the latter.

Most of all, though, he had noticed the change in his brother and king even long before she was revealed to be Ceara of Ériu. A change that became much more prominent afterwards. And Koumei would have to be blind to not notice that it had been her presence that incurred such change. It felt to be something akin to what they all had found with her but perhaps not as platonic.

Regardless of name, this young woman was overall and foremost a giving person. To be charitable seemed to come naturally to her. And by giving, she received: good or bad and one way or another. And the fact that he had come to such a conclusion on his own went to show how his brother was right yet again.

" _In spite of all that has happened, it astounds me still,"_ he had said the day he told Koumei everything Ceara had confessed to him. _"Afflicted as she is, she went down a self-destructive path. She kept giving even when it began to destroy her. It intrigues me and I want to understand why it does and why she cannot derail herself from such path."_

Koumei could fathom some answer but doubted it was correct if the only one: Ceara was a child at her core. And like a child starved of affection and a sense of security, she clung to what she could, pleading for it to never leave. But it was possible to grow out of such state, especially when she was as conscious of the problem as they were.

Koumei knew the merit of keeping her secret hidden, it gave them reign over a multiple dungeon capturer without any effort from their part. But helping her overcome her mental affliction would cripple that reign making it almost nonexistent. Nonetheless it's what his brother had chosen to do. He wanted to know her, to know her circumstances, and to understand.

The idea by itself made Koumei pity her. When his brother wanted something, nothing ever stopped him from obtaining it. And despite everything that had happened and what was now known, Koumei couldn't deny that he had come to know her as she was. Whichever name she went by, it changed nothing of who she was and it showed. So maybe, like his siblings had done so far, he, too, could allow himself to understand and forgive.

A long yawn caught him by surprise and showed him just how bad his exhaustion was. So much was going on to prepare for the Summit meeting that he found it hard to sleep or even concentrate. But despite how much he wanted to rest, work still clouded his mind. There was so much to do tomorrow: paperwork that needed to be finished, preparations for when they left, accommodations for those staying there in Balbadd's palace. That lay thought bothered him for some reason; almost like he was forgetting something. Was someone coming to Balbadd's palace? If he remembered correctly, yes. But when was it that they would arrive? He doubted it would be that night. Tomorrow? In a couple of days?

He yawned again as he finally arrived at his quarters. Thoughts fleeted around in his mind and settled on what he assumed was the right answer.

A couple of days sounded right. He would have to let his brother know. But it could wait till the morrow.

* * *

Had this been any other time in the past, Ceara would have to admit that it would have been awkward or simply unnerving. But the silence that came over the study as Ceara and Kouen read felt much more pleasant. Ceara found herself taking a sit next to him after he continued to ask questions about the records she made; it was much easier to point at something while sitting beside him than from across the desk.

He gave short nods as she explained them, giving her his full attention and yet appeared to be completely taken with the read. It put her at ease talking about this, something that she felt proud of and was more than happy to talk about. It was after they were almost done with the penultimate scroll that Kouen lowered it onto the desk. Ceara barely noticed this being more engrossed in what information Koumei had given her to mention it. It wasn't until Kouen spoke up that she stopped scribbling and looked to the side at him.

"How did you start all this?" he asked.

"I told you," she replied, a little confused he'd asked something she had already answered. "Two years ago. Around the time I took over General Koujiro's position."

A small hum came from him but it sounded somewhat defeated. "Maybe I'm not asking the right question." Putting the scroll fully on the desk he turned his full attention to her, crimson eyes tinted gold staring directly into her own stark blue. "Why did you start taking soldiers' interviews in the first place? What got you interested in recording their anecdotes?"

"What got me interested?" she repeated a bit caught off guard. Ceara tapped Beleth's Metal Vessel against the paper she'd been writing on as she thought about it. It only took her a few seconds to find the answer she knew to be true. Laying back against the chair's back, Ceara twirled the feather pen between her fingers. "I suppose it was when I started searching for what happened to Cael."

"Your brother?"

Ceara nodded and took a deep breath before continuing. "Remember how I told you that I never knew much of what happened to him or how he died?" When Kouen nodded, she simply turned back to stare at the ceiling as she let her mind work through the years. "It had always bothered me that no one ever knew anything or that they didn't want to tell me. But it wasn't until after…" Ceara pursed her lips, somewhat uncomfortable mentioning it, "It wasn't until after the fire at Rakushou that I began to search. When I learned that Hakuyuu and Hakuren both had passed away and saw how Hakuryuu was so badly injured, it reminded me of what I had lost. What hit me hardest had been seeing Hakuei; it was strange but I could clearly see myself in her. It reminded me of what I had lost, what I had felt, and that I still had questions that needed answers." Playing with the feather pen, she stroke the plumage against her opened palm, letting the sensation soothe and distract her. "When we went back to Shika after spending a year and a half in the capital, I began searching. Because many of the soldiers that were in General Koujiro's unit were stationed there, it was easy to go to them and inquire about him."

"I imagine they found it bizarre for the General's daughter to ask about one specific soldier," Kouen pointed out, his hands laced together and resting before him. "What was your excuse?"

"Research," Ceara replied straight away. "That or just curiosity. They seldom questioned a little girl's curiosity so long as I gave them an excuse. It didn't have to be believable to them." To calm herself as her anxiety mounted with the memory of that, she kept brushing Beleth's vessel against her skin liking how even that minute touch made a soothing noise that reached her ears. "But even after months of searching, I found nothing but scraps of what gossip they had heard. It seemed he wasn't with Koujiro's army when he died."

"Was that where you heard their stories?" he asked seemingly grasping where she was going.

As answer, she nodded and brought Beleth's vessel up to brush the feather against her chin pensively. "They might not have known about his death but they had fought alongside him." A crooked smile curled one side of her lips as she chuckled. "Their tales about him and how they met or knew about him were...intriguing. Even when some had nothing to do with Cael or when they weren't such good storytellers, I couldn't help but listen. It was like—" her hands moved around as she found it hard to find the right words to describe it. Finally though, she settled and went back to twirling her pen. "I can't even describe it. I was just so captivated by their lives, what they've done—everything about them. It was like every new thing I heard was just as relatable, or maybe enjoyable, or even sad sometimes. It's a little hard to explain."

And even thinking it over in her head was hard to do. She just found it so fascinating to know about people: their lives, their achievements, their failures, their regrets, their hopes, their dreams. It was like finding a new world to explore and discover with every one of them.

It was like…

"It's almost akin to being bewitched." Ceara turned to Kouen at hearing his words and watched as he stared down at the scrolls, lifting his gaze to stare at the boundless of others on his shelves and the countless histories that they held. "You can't deter your eyes from it and neither can you ignore the yearning that comes over you. You wish to know and understand, one way or another, and when you finally do—"

"It's satisfying," she murmured and was astounded that he had spoken those same words allowed. Yeah, she supposed that if she had to describe why she enjoyed listening to so many stories, then it would certainly be because of how satisfying it was to know. "Not many appreciate how just listening to what others have to say can bring solidarity and understanding when the world is so desolate. They've all said to some extent that they feel so disconnected from others, that they're different or wouldn't be understood, but when you look at their individual life stories and their fears and joys as a whole, it just gives you such a broader perspective. One that they neglect. They think they're all so different from each other when they're not. And it's sad that only I get to see that."

"You want to show them," Kouen surmised.

Glad that he was following her just fine, Ceara nodded and smiled. "That is why I started recording their anecdotes with the intention of publishing them. I want them to know they're not different. I want them to feel like I do and understand that the divide that separates us isn't truly there. It's man made and it's breakable. We shouldn't be fighting against one another because we believe others are wrong and we are right. We should stand united because we all share something in common: we're human. If I can show even a small portion of people that, then maybe real understanding can happen. That dream of the world being united as one could become true."

"Ignorance often brings about with it hatred and bigotry." Kouen sat straight as he waved his hand across the scrolls that still laid open for them. "There is none of that when people simply tell their tale. They're biased, there's no avoiding that, but—"

"But selfishness is normal, isn't it?" she teased lightly, her nose scrunching up and a grin spreading across her face.

"And it's plain as day because of it," he continued not one bit fazed by her interruption. "When people care about something they will protect it at all costs. And when what they care for is threatened, that's when wars begin."

"Where'd you hear that?" she asked curious.

"From Emperor Hakutoku years ago when Koumei and I had just joined their brigade to unite Kai and Gou under Kou."

"You and Koumei? How old were you?"

"I was just shy of sixteen," he said. Reaching up, he began stroking his chin, his fingers sometimes stroking all the way down his goatee. "A few months before I captured Agares, if I remember correctly."

Ceara briefly counted in her head; if Kouen had been sixteen, that would've made Koumei around fourteen. "Why bring your brother? Was he conscripted like the rest?"

Kouen shook his head. "He wanted to come. The emperor allowed it so long as I stayed by his side. Back when we started we weren't allowed to linger far from the main battalion or from them. His majesty never wanted for us to perish—he was a man that cherished his family almost as much as he did his country."

"He sounds like a great man," Ceara muttered, turning to face Kouen. "Despite spending so much time in the palace during that year, I never really got a chance to meet him. We just saw him from afar."

"Emperor Hakutoku was one of the greatest, most brilliant men I have ever had the honor to meet and fight with. The same can be said about Prince Hakuyuu and Hakuren."

Ceara didn't miss the very slight change in tone that his voice suffered. She had known Hakuyuu and Hakuren for a short time and she thought the same. But knowing that Kouen had spent much more time with them put that in another perspective for her. She had seen when they were younger how much he had admired the three of them, especially Hakuyuu. And Ceara couldn't say that she wasn't surprised.

"I know that's true of Hakuyuu and Hakuren," she said briefly with a small purse of her lips. "Hakuyuu reminded me a lot of Cael, at least from the way he cared for Hakuei and Hakuryuu. It was always nice to see them together."

 _And in the blink of an eye, both of them had lost what they loved most. Just like I had._

A disturbing quiet came over them at such grim note. It was Kouen who reminded her of what they had actually been talking about as he rolled one scroll and opened the last to read as she spoke.

"Where did I leave off?" she asked having lost her train of thought.

"You began writing their anecdotes," Kouen pointed out. "Much too detailed, I might add."

She took that as a compliment even if it hadn't been. "It was after sometime of writing their stories that I began to notice the families themselves. Some of the soldiers that survived not only lived with their families but had taken in the families of their comrades. It shocked me that there weren't good compensations for those who lost their family members in war."

"There is," he corrected.

"Not enough," she countered straight away. "Had I not been living with Kohaku, what little I was given after Cael died would not have lasted me more than a few months. I saw that clearly when I got to meet the widows and orphans left behind when their fathers, husbands, or sons died in battle. Compensation was all they got, and they were extremely lucky if they got anything to bury. When I began noticing this, I wanted to do something for them but at my age and without any money I couldn't do much aside from planning for the future. It wasn't until I began being compensated for my work as interim general that I managed to do something."

"Even as interim general, the compensation was minimum seeing as you were volunteering yourself."

"I volunteered because of what it would give me and because I had been fed the idea that as daughter of the Reizei family, I had to be loyal to my family first and foremost." Ceara shrugged and averted her eyes. "I understood their values, though, so a part of me went along with it. In either case, it gave me enough to have some foundation and what Koujiro and Ariana gave me as their daughter made it possible for me to start working for those that the war left behind without anything."

"The orphan houses," Kouen stated while he reached for a particular bound journal and opened it. The writing in it was different from the majority of the other scrolls and books; the few different ones were ones that she had Seijin working on and it showed by the difference in handwriting. "The first one was in Shika."

"It's fairly new," Ceara explained, pointing at certain dates that Seijin had transcripted from her old scrolls. "There's still much to improve on."

"For being a two year old institution that was run privately, one wouldn't think so," Kouen told her. Despite how nonchalantly he said it, Ceara caught the slight hint of the assurance he was trying to give. "You added an education system to it?"

"Yes," she said leaning closer to read the notes she had written back then. "It's better for them to learn and be able to work in the society Kou builds. I didn't just want to safeguard their present but also their future. I knew that if they didn't at least learn the basics they wouldn't be able to get anywhere once they reached a proper age to start working."

It still amazed her that a plan like the one that she had thrown together the best she could with how pressured she felt to start it had worked so well. The children didn't just get shelter and food, they got security and education. The latter was most important and gave them an edge in a society that functioned on the merit of work. The more knowledgeable they were and the more they were prepared for the world they would eventually rejoin, the better it would be for the empire as a whole. The empire would gain finely educated citizens that would work more efficiently. The children would be guaranteed a future and given the opportunity to prosper when they had nothing left.

"Learning gives them purpose, and with purpose comes hope," she explained with a smile on her lips. "I've found that hope is the best motivator when they've lost it all. I've helped built the facility in Shika and the two in Rakushou. Balbadd is another large country whose citizens suffered greatly from their previous regime, so I wanted to establish another here as well."

Kouen kept reading the journal, dividing his attention between her and the book. "These names…" he pointed out those that he talked about, mostly non-native people of Rakushou or Shika. There was only one population among the hierarchy of Kou's society that consisted of different races. "You've been buying slaves?"

Ceara gave him a wry smile before nodding. "I haven't been as successful about that as I wish I could be," she confessed. "Turns out people aren't fond of letting go of their slaves if they can help it. And even when they are, they place ludicrous prices on them. It's been hard and has cost me resources I could've put on the facilities but it is worth it on the long run. Citizens or not, children don't deserve to live in servitude. No one does but I can't do everything by myself. What little I can I do, but it's only a small percent in one of our largest populations. Despite what you or Koumei may say, I'm greatly against slavery. Even if it is a necessary evil, I can't condone it."

"It's a fairer system than most," Kouen reminded her.

"A system nonetheless," she retorted. "But it's not as hopeless as I thought at first. Koumei was the one that told me when I disagreed with him that if I could come up with a better answer then it was possible to consider an alternative. It's hard but I'm working on it."

"And you have done all this alone?"

"I started it alone," she confirmed with a small nod. "Seijin has helped me greatly and has taken a big interest in the project, though. But as for the facilities and memoirs, I've had more than my share of help. The soldiers willingly give their histories and it's the people that manage the orphan houses and education. I provide the resources and help when I can at the houses but it's mostly them that do the hard work." Ceara placed her feather pen upon the desk with her left hand, the light faintly catching her bone encrusted bracelet. "What I said to them was the truth: they shouldn't be forgotten. No one deserves that. The memoir provides an account of those that fight and those that are lost to the wars presently. The facilities give those left behind a hope for the future."

"Answer me this." His sudden change in tone made her turn expectantly. It wasn't harsh or demeaning, just bland and somewhat confused. "Why do this when there was a chance of it all crumbling down where you to be found out?"

Ceara blinked a couple of times and averted her gaze unable to meet his eyes at the question. "I...never really thought that far into the future. My mind was on what I could do tomorrow, in a week, or in a month even. But years?" She shook her head as she took a deep breath. "Looking towards the future meant thinking about being discovered. Up to recently with you, I have never thought about the possibility of it all falling apart." Surprisingly, she found herself smiling lightly at one thought, "Thankfully, I have Seijin. Even if I'm gone, he will continue. He has enough passion for it to do so.'

"I understand." The conversation stopped briefly with neither of them saying or doing anything. Again the topic had turned sour but this time Kouen chose to continue down that road. "Is that the kind of legacy you want to leave behind?"

"Legacy?" she repeated somewhat taken aback by the type of question. Was it? In a way, she supposed it was. "I suppose so. I wish to leave a good legacy for Kohaku's namesake. This way, I think people will remember her for doing good. If that happens, then I'll be happy."

"That's not what I meant." His tone changed again and it was clear to Ceara's sensitive ears. It became somewhat annoyed but all the same gentle. Before she could even ask what he meant, he clarified his question. "I didn't ask what you want Kohaku's legacy to be. I asked what you want _yours_ to be—Ceara's."

"Mine?" Genuinely puzzled that she couldn't come up with a concrete answer, she began brushing through her hair thoughtfully. "Mine…"

 _What_ do _I want?_

It was hard to think about it. All this time she had worried much more about others, seldom about herself. Now that she knew that, it was easy to pinpoint instances of that and even times where it had put her in harm's way. But knowing the problem didn't automatically solve it. She still had a hard time separating her actions from her emotions, and even the bits she could control felt bizarre, like she was doing something she wasn't supposed to. Now that Kouen was trying to help her deal with her affliction, it made it better but not by much. He'd been right: this wouldn't be fixed overnight.

Hell, she was still petrified about confronting the twins and the days were slowly dwindling towards their arrival. It would come, inevitable as it was, and she understood that. But again…

 _Just because I know now doesn't mean it will fix me all of a sudden._

This felt similar to that. Not as harrowing but just as puzzling to think about all the same. But by talking about her problems, Ceara found that it was easier and it helped her work them out. Maybe this wouldn't be that different.

"I'm...not entirely sure," she confessed with a purse of her lips. "I know what you mean to ask but I can't make up my mind."

"How come?" he inquired leaning forward in his chair, apparently intrigued.

"I don't know." When he urged Ceara to think of at least something, anything really, she found herself bursting out with whatever her mind came up. It didn't matter if it made sense or not. "I-I guess it's because I've been so immersed into being Kohaku for so long."

Kouen raised an eyebrow at her answer. As she repeated what she had said in her own mind, Ceara could see how that was so unnecessarily convoluted. Surprisingly, though, Kouen hummed in agreement and sat back against his chair. "Can you explain further?"

She knew that tone of voice. He wasn't asking to know because he'd already surmised the answer from her words. He was asking to make her think for herself and find that same answer. She both hated and appreciated the effort to make her figure things out for herself.

"I think it's...useless really to even leave something behind. After all, Ceara doesn't exist anymore. I buried that name along with what I found of Kohaku's remains a long time ago. To even want to leave a legacy under my name sounds..."

 _Impossible._

She shook the thought away and finished her original trail of thought. "Even if I do, it wouldn't matter. I no longer exist to the people."

"Surely with this your name will resurface," Kouen reminded her.

Instead of bringing her the sense of assurance he must've meant, all Ceara felt was dread. He wasn't wrong. Once she told the twins—a chill ran up her spine as she wrapped her arms around herself—everything would surface again. People would know who she was and more importantly what she had done. And she had prove with Masami that the response wouldn't be anything positive.

"Even if it does, no one would want to remember a murderer."

Scaring and shocking her at the same time, Kouen exhaled and in the same breath grabbed the armrests of her chair to turn it completely. When the screeching of the chair's legs stopped, she was facing him fully as he turned his without much effort either. The words of protest she wanted to give died in her throat the moment she caught the pure annoyance, bordering anger, that marred his face.

 _What the hell is wrong now?_

"Stop that." His voice rumbled deeper than usual through her eardrums. The vibrations were so slow and forceful that they caused a tingling sensation in them, making her reach up to stop the sound by covering her ears slightly.

"Stop what?"

"That self-loathing shit you keep reverting to."

 _Oh yeah. He's mad._

"I don't—"

But he didn't let her finish and instead plastered his hands on either of her armrests effectively enclosing her there. The action itself stopped her vocals cords from working along with her mind. It was enough to get her full attention.

"You cannot blame yourself for something you could not have possibly stopped."

Ceara wanted to protest. She really did. But she buried the urge fearing that poking the sullen tiger before her would make him snap further.

"Djinn are historically unknown beings with arcane powers that have barely been studied. As a dumb, depressed orphan, you wouldn't have had the slightest idea of how to control Murmur. It doesn't matter that you managed to contract with him at your age, you were still young. Tell me, would you punish a child for being careless and accidentally killing it's pet?"

That flimsy comparison gave her back her voice. "That doesn't compare to what I—"

Kouen slid the chair a tad bit closer, her knees touching his as he repeated his question. "Would you?"

"No."

"Then you shouldn't blame yourself," he concluded to her. "A child knows nothing until it learns or it's taught. You had no one to teach you. You learned and did so the hardest way possible. You are no different than that child because you were one then. You were stupid, scared, and alone."

 _He's really hammering down the stupid part._

And Ceara understood his reasoning. She just didn't like it. Not one bit. "Who is to blame then? Because I can assure you that the people will want someone to crucify and I've proven to be the easiest target."

"No one is," he said sternly yet quieting down from his previous fit. His hands slid back from the armrests of her chair as he sat back against his own. "Death, unlike the rest of this world, doesn't discriminate—it simply takes. That it took your father, brother, and Kohaku didn't mean they deserved to die, or that you deserved to be left alone. It just meant that their time had come."

"You're the last person I would ever peg for believing in fate," she relied with a furrowed brow.

"I don't."

 _What?_

"But sometimes it's the only thing that makes senseless occurrences the least bit conceivable. If they happen for a reason, then what happened isn't meaningless itself. Death comes to all and like you said before, we don't get to choose who it takes. But how one dies doesn't matter in the end. What matters is what one does while alive. You've undergone a grand task for the sake of others, for the sake of what you wanted for them, and it's paid off; people will remember you because of it. And even when they might one day know the truth, it's possible that they choose to overlook it. To sully what good has been done because sheer petty anger would be a waste."

"They will, though. People aren't that understanding," she muttered but the small quiver in her voice made her shut her mouth quickly. _They never are._ "They can't forgive what they don't understand. And with how they're told to think here, they won't even try."

"We have."

A scoff bubbled from her lips as she felt a mix of relief and bitterness come over her. "Then you're all idiots." But as those words sank into her mind, she began to believe them. She wanted to believe them.

In a way, it reminded her of Murmur's words: even when they were gone, what they represented was still left behind. She remembered them little in death and recalled their time alive much more. And it had been her desire to know more about them while they were alive that brought along the greater change.

"They lived their lives and passed. It's time to live for yourself like they did. Learn from them, learn from their example, and live your life for what you want to leave behind."

"You make it sound like a perfect fairytale," she whispered with a wry chuckle. "If I want to live like that, then I'd have a short life as things stand. No one that knew would let me live."

"I already told you that won't happen," he reminded her. "I won't allow it. It doesn't matter how fatalistic you are about the truth being found."

"I see it more as being realistic," she corrected. "After thirteen years of the life I've lived, I've experienced a broad spectrum of people. I've gotten to know how the society around me works. Many are nice, some not so much, but when angered or in fear, they will retaliate. And as bleak as it sounds, I've found that it's easier for them to hate than to forgive. It's easier to deal with for me as well. I've learned to live expecting such things and I've learned to work with it. I've experienced my share of deep-seated hatred from another. And if she couldn't find it in her heart to forgive me, I don't think anybody can."

Ceara caught the small airflow of his lungs with her ears: he wanted to protest. But before he could, she cut him off by standing from her place. She didn't feel like talking anymore. Letting the chair screech in protest as she pushed it back to give herself space, Ceara gave the last piece of her mind. "It's getting late and I'm tired of talking about this."

As she busied herself cleaning up the mess, Kouen stood aside for a few moments. Ceara half expected him to intervene and bully her back to a sit to continue talking but to her surprise he didn't. Instead, he began helping her tidy up the scrolls and books she'd brought in.

"Unrelated to that—" Kouen's voice came to her ears and she was about to protest saying she was done talking when the words processed. He was willing to let it go for now but he still wanted to know more.

 _What the hell more is there to know?_

"What?" she muttered under her breath.

"Did you ever learn what happened to your brother?"

Ceara debated whether to answer that question. It was personal but as he had said it wasn't related to what had made her snap at him. Slowing down as she was quickly finishing the clean up with his help, she sighed, tapping her fingers against the desk. Finally deciding to reply to him, she turned her head slightly to let him hear her better.

"Cael died saving a young boy out in the battlefield; that's what I got from what information I gathered. He died the same way he lived: a hero." She shrugged her shoulders at saying this knowing he could and would certainly badger her for her dull thought. "At least that's what he always was in my eyes. And that's how I'll remember him. I...didn't want to know any details after that, or at least I got over it since then."

 _I suppose...I'm just at peace that he didn't die in vain._

Surprisingly, there was no chastise or ridicule from him; Kouen only nodded showing he had heard her. After that, Ceara focused on trying to carry the scrolls back but found it hard to do so all at once with so many. She really tried every way she could think of, though, because she really didn't want to come back with how her temper was still piqued.

"Leave them here."

Kouen's words made her turn up with a raised eyebrow. "I can't," she replied. "I don't want anything to happen to them."

"Nothing will. Not so long as they remain here." He motioned out with his arm at the large study that seemed more like a private library than anything. "This was made for my private use. No one is allowed entrance unless specifically granted access. Leave them here and you will have access, day or night."

"You're kidding." At hearing this, Kouen raised his own questioning eyebrow which made Ceara chuckle a bit at the out-of-place gesture. She waved her hand dismissively and nodded at that, "Right. I forgot who I was talking to for a second." But if he was offering such haven for her records...maybe it'd be worth it to keep them there. "And you can assure me nothing will happen to them here?"

"You have my word."

And he had proven that he could keep it. With a nod, she smiled and asked him where she could put them. Taking her to one of the empty shelves, he helped her put them away seeing as she had a system of her own that helped her keep organized.

* * *

Her whole collection took most of the top half of the shelf, but seeing as Kouen had prepared much spare space for his own private library, he knew there to be enough to house her own. And as he watched her place every individual scroll or bound book in place, his mind began to wander to what she had told him.

Cael had died protecting a young boy in the battlefield. Whomever had said that got it correct. Cael of Ériu had certainly died protecting a boy—a young, idiotic boy of sixteen that had barely captured his first dungeon and had yet to know how those strange powers worked. That had been one of his first battles after having captured Agares. Kouen had been offered more time to train with the djinn before returning to the battlefield but in his youthful arrogance he had wanted to return as soon as possible after having attained such power that could help their cause. And in his arrogance, he had been an utter fool.

The reason he kept reminding Ceara that a djinn was hard to control especially to someone young who knew no better was because he had lived through such experience. In his arrogance, he thought he could use Agares to end a feud that had started weeks prior. In his arrogance, he had failed to control his powers fully. And because of his arrogance, utter stupidity, and rashness, a young man had sustained a grave injury protecting him from an enemy attack. When the crown princes and Emperor Hakutoku were too occupied to have his back, a young unnamed soldier had come between him and an enemy's sword. What was meant to be a blow to end his life had shortened another's. Not as fast as it should have, though. The young man still fought even after being gravely injured. He fought alongside Kouen and the remaining soldiers until the enemy troops had been driven out of the small town.

It wasn't until everything was done that he fell due to his injuries. He could have lived, of that Kouen was sure. Prince Hakuyuu had said as much after Kouen had told him what had happened. At that time, though, it had meant little to Kouen. Just another soldier dying for the prosperity of their country.

Now, the knowledge of who that young man was scoured him. Now, Kouen knew him to be more than just a soldier. He had been someone's son, someone's older brother, and the only living relative of one little girl.

"...I'm…"

"Mm. Did you say something?"

Hearing her speak, Kouen lifted his gaze to meet hers, eyes full of confusion and interest. Her hearing; he hated her acute hearing. It made him watch his tongue around her. Most of all, it made it impossible for a secret to be kept from her. So long as it was spoken and she wanted to hear it, it would be heard.

Something in him, though, didn't want to tell her. Not yet, anyway.

 _Is this what she experiences with the mere thought of the twins?_

If it was, he could find it in himself to pity her somewhat. "Nothing," he replied and gave her the last of her scrolls to put away. Not finding anything odd, she shrugged it off and finished organizing her documents.

"There," she whispered proudly. "All done." With bright eyes and a small smile, Ceara turned to him and walked on forth. "We should go rest now. It's pretty late and Koumei did say you had some work tomorrow. I've got things to figure out too with what you two have given me to work with." As she walked, her foot skipped a few steps which, he supposed, was out of giddiness. "There's much to do."

"You seem elated," he pointed out unable to keep it to himself.

"I am as hard as it is to believe. At least a little." Her blatant confession wasn't surprising; that she stopped and turned to face him just as they reached the open area where his desk was had been. She had stopped and that gave him enough time to do the same. It didn't seem to bother her that they were just within arms reach of one another. Instead, Ceara turned up to meet his gaze as her lips curled into a small smile. "And I suppose I have you to thank for that."

That gaudy grin and glint in her eyes told him plenty: she was trying to annoy him on purpose. It amazed him somewhat that she still had that gall to do so when she knew from experience that taunting him never ended well. "You suppose?" he asked, his voice raising a tad bit.

"Yes, I have Koumei more to thank than you in reality," she said thinking aloud as she tapped her chin with one finger, her small smile shifting into a crooked grin. "After all, he's the one in charge of the economy of Kou, isn't he? I think I'll thank him tomorrow."

 _Give gratitude were it's due._

But the words didn't exactly come out as he had wanted them. Actually, they didn't come out at all. Instead, his body reacted, his hand reaching down and grabbing her wrist to pull her until her back came against the nearest shelf. Shock and surprise were mixed in her eyes as they widened looking up at him as he cornered her. Despite the brusque action, he was no closer to her than before, a foot or two still creating a space between them.

"After almost a year of helping you—this month especially—I was under the assumption that common courtesy would oblige you to show some gratitude," he commented.

The small shock receded as his words seem to sink. She regained some composure and that grin came back to her. "Isn't it petty for a prince to expect gratitude from his charity?"

Unable to keep the scoff from escaping him, Kouen turned away before laying one of his arms above her head to support himself as he leaned forward, still keeping the space between them. "I believe you're confusing me with yourself."

"Oh-ho," she breathed, bringing a hand to her chest in feigned pain. In the midst of her bluff, though, he could see her backing up against the shelf. "Now that's a low blow."

Kouen gave her a slight shrug of his shoulders. "Not if it's true."

"Don't be greedy now," she countered with instead. "Good comes to those who wait."

"I've waited enough. And you have no right to preach patience to me," he replied. "Not after taking that chaste, albeit drunken, initiative back in Rakushou." When Ceara began stuttering about what he meant, he choked a bit—something between a chortle and scoff—before smirking. "You were dead drunk and stumbled to the library. Do you wish for me to fill in the rest of the details?"

"Unnecessary," she declared, raising her hands to cover his face completely. "I admit that was uncalled for. Besides, like you said, I was drunk. That hardly counts as anything significant."

"Significant." The word slipped from his lips and before he knew it, Kouen was leaning in closer, bringing her hands down to fully see her. At noticing her suddenly standing still, though, he stopped, hovering a few inches over her. "What would imply significance to you then?"

"Meaningfulness."

The answer got him to roll his eyes. "Redundancy aside, Ceara, what would you consider meaningful?"

"Having a choice, for one," she replied quickly and backed herself against the bookshelf. Looking over her shoulder to see it there, her head spun back to meet his eyes.

"Then I won't do anything you don't want me to," he whispered being close enough for her to hear it. "You may stay—" he lowered one of his arms before he continued, leaving the path to the exit fairly open, "or you may leave. As you requested, it will be your choice."

* * *

 _Mine…?_

Curiously, Ceara turned her head sideways to her left were, without his arm, a path was laid open straight to the exit. But the thought of leaving drowned as his words echoed in her head. Not only his words but his actions. Ceara knew Kouen but this, dare she say, playful side of his she had never seen before. He was so forthright with his invitation, overtly so even for him. But she didn't dislike that of him either. Kouen was usually forthright about anything he wanted as she had seen that many times before.

It was one of the things she appreciated and liked much about him.

" _Do I sense something rekindling, little king? Something like l—"_

 _Shush, Mur._

It couldn't be.

" _Why not?"_ Marbas spoke with a chuckle. _"You're not Reizei Kohaku anymore, right? So what if Masami's marrying him? It don't implicate you as Ceara, right?"_

So what? They had to be kidding. This couldn't be; if anything, she should ignore it.

" _Like you say, tomorrow is only a promise,"_ Beleth reminded her. _"Are you certain that you will not regret not taking this opportunity if tomorrow never comes."_

Regret. There were a lot of things she regretted. And like they kept telling her, she didn't want this to be one of those things. Tired after years of hiding, she finally had people who knew. More than anything, she had people that understood her, who supported her, and who forgave her. She had yet to tell the whole truth to everyone but that day wasn't too far off; her gut told her as much. But after releasing Kohaku, after all her past finally coming afloat, Ceara had started living anew. Ceara had promised her that she would live the life she wanted, as hard as that would be and as absurd as it sounded.

And she wanted this man to be a part of it for as long as that would be. It made her unimaginably delighted that he was seeking her openly like this. All the same, though, he was sourly reminding her of other things that couldn't be changed. And yet she dared want the impossible—she dared want him. Even in spite of what was happening, of what felt like an impending demise, or even the fact that so long as he was engaged he could never really be hers, Ceara wanted him. And selfishly so.

 _And it's normal._

It took awhile but she understood that now.

 _Then just for now, before everything falls, I'll build a tiny bridge to a peaceful island. I'll be there where I can be myself. Where I'll just be Ceara._

That was enough for her and got her to take a step forward. That was all she needed to do to close the space between them. It wasn't much to begin with and to fully close it, Ceara only needed to raise herself somewhat on her toes to brush her lips against his. It was chaste, quick, and just enough for her like it had been before. But it didn't appear to be enough for him. Instead of standing still like he had promised, Kouen moved closer as she pulled back and caught her lips again. In slight surprise, he caught her lips somewhat parted but even being a little forceful didn't stop him from continuing. Unable to keep her hands to herself, Ceara brought them up placing them against his chest as he continued the slow yet intense kiss. As she closed her eyes, she felt his arms as they came off from the shelves and around her, felt his calloused hands as one slid down to her hips and the other took her by the side of her jaw to tilt her head. Smitten as she was, Ceara followed his lead and drowned in the unfamiliar yet welcomed sensations.

It was indescribable—the heat that remained everywhere his fingers touched, the contrast of his rough hands with the softness of his lips against hers, the pure sensation of having his body flush against hers as he pinned her back against the shelf. He was quickly taking over and as much as she had told herself that this would only be a fast little kiss to qualm her mind and his, at this point, she knew they were past that. Especially when he left her lips to lightly nip down her jawline towards her neck.

"What are you— _mm..._ "

"Like I said…" he whispered against her neck, his breath warm against her skin, making her shiver in his grasp, "My patience has been long gone."

"Mine isn't," she rectified as sternly as she could but having a hard time saying no when his small ministrations kept her mind focused on him. "You said it was my choice."

"It is," he agreed with a long sigh. Having said that, he pulled back to fully face her, parting himself from her by a few inches. The few seconds gave her enough time to breath; it also gave her time to notice how shallow her breathing was from the exchange. "I may have no patience but I will keep my word. Tell me to stop and I will." At saying this he drew back a small distance, just enough for them to breath their own air. "Tell me to continue and I will." His hands, though, reached up to take a strand of her hair in between his fingers. His gaze came down to the delicate hold before returning to her blue eyes. "Tell me and I will listen, Ceara."

 _That..._

"Say it again," she whispered.

He took a second before repeating, "Ceara."

The fact that he stared right into her eyes as he said it made her even more conscious of the blood that rushed to her face. Somewhat embarrassed that she had asked that of him, she let her head fall against his chest, hiding her flushed face. "Why does it sound so...comforting?"

The rumble of his scoff—or was it a chuckle?—traveled through his chest and onto her ears as she laid her head there. "When was the last time anybody called you by your name before this?"

"Years," she confessed in a defeated sigh. Lifting her head, her stark blue eyes met with his crimson tinted gold. Out of curiosity, she reached up with her hands to envelope what she could of his face with them. Her hands were small themselves and only covered his jaw and cheeks, her thumbs landing just above his cheekbones. Swiping them gently over them, she stared straight into his eyes and chuckled. "But it sounds nice hearing it from you."

He didn't answer and instead grabbed one of her hands in his. Pulling it back down, he leaned in once more and this time she didn't bother stopping him. Instead she fell in tandem with him and stood straighter to meet his lips. Again, the exchange began slow but quickly shifted as he leaned further against her to deepen the kiss.

Because her mind was so blank and focused solely on him, Ceara couldn't help jumping out of her skin and hitting the shelf behind her hard after hearing a ruckus just feet from them. Both turning to the source, they found stacks of scrolls and books on the ground, scattered after being dropped. But whether it was an accident or on purpose was the last thing in Ceara's mind. What made her forget completely about the last few seconds was the person that began to hurriedly gather the collections and apologize to Kouen at the same time.

"How clumsy of me," Masami muttered with a small nervous chuckle. Having a few seconds to collect herself, Ceara snuck out from Kouen's range to be at a safe distance from him before she opened her mouth. But before she could say anything, Masami stood up leaving half of what she'd dropped on the floor to gaze at Ceara. The sudden turn of Masami's emotions—going from somewhat embarrassed to complete relief—shocked her and more so when she ran up to embrace her. Stiff and caught off guard, Ceara couldn't react properly or even feign to seeing as she was genuinely bewildered by the action itself.

Pulling back, Masami brushed her hands across Ceara's face and sighed as if in relief of seeing her there. "Thank goodness you're all right," she whispered loudly and smiled. Instead of being touched by the gesture, Ceara felt nothing but cold distance, and something else broiling underneath all that sweetness. Something darker. "When I heard you'd fought in Magnostadt and almost died—oh." Masami grabbed her again to hold her tightly, her nails seemingly digging into her shoulders. "Forget it, I'm just glad nothing happened to any of you. And your voice—" The mere mention of that made Ceara's blood run cold.

 _Who?_

"Sousei and Suisei wrote to me the moment you got to Balbadd and told me everything." Masami turned her gaze behind Ceara's shoulder towards Kouen and smiled warmly. "Truly you have my gratitude for all you've done for her."

Ceara couldn't speak in fear of what she would do. But she didn't need to, not when Kouen was there to explain despite her not wanting to.

"Everything was done in order for her to better herself," he said calmly, as if nothing had happened a few minutes ago that Masami might or might not have seen. "She fought well during the battle both as a dungeon capturer and general."

"Yes," Masami sighed as if glad to hear that. "She's part of the pride and joy of our family. She will always do what's best, isn't that right?"

Ceara couldn't move as Masami ran her hand down her arm, her nails scraping against her skin sending chills down her spine. "Y-Yes, but Masami we shouldn't—"

"Oh, of course," she called out, the sudden change in the pitch of her voice making Ceara jump in her skin again. "I'm sorry, I was just so happy to see you well that I didn't even think. We should leave you be your highness. I have so much I wish to hear from Kohaku."

All at once, Ceara's heart stopped.

 _Leave?_

The myriad of things that could mean—and the most likely one—petrified her, especially when Masami was clearly trying so hard to hide her ire.

Instinctively, Ceara pulled back bringing her hands up to her chest defensively but feigning concern the best she could.

"B-But work," she countered weakly. Knowing it was her chance to avoid whatever punishment Masami wanted to deal— _for now_ —Ceara opted to go down the most logical route. She turned to glance at Kouen briefly before addressing Masami, "There's been so much work that's piled up. It needs to be finished and with so many things to do tomorrow it's best if I finish tonight."

Masami frowned and sighed, "But Kohaku, you shouldn't exert yourself so much. Not after what happened. One night won't kill you."

 _I beg to differ._

Fear driving her, she turned to Kouen with pleading eyes. Thankfully, he turned to Masami to reinforce her words. "This must be done by tomorrow morning and it can't be neglected for a later time. She has had more than enough time to recuperate from Magnostadt."

"Then she can wake up early and finish." With the same fake concern, Masami turned to Ceara. "You must rest, little lamb." Ceara froze when Masami grabbed her by the wrist and pulled her closer to herself. Pulling her into another embrace and hiding her face against her shoulder, Ceara caught the words that albeit muffled against her clothes were more than audible to her.

"...convince him…"

Fear rushed through her and struck her to the core. The sheer commanding tone of her voice and the fact that she held onto her so tightly reverted her back to how she was. All at once and out of nowhere, Ceara was petrified of the consequences like before. And like before, she abided.

Grabbing Masami's hand to leave some space between them, she turned to Kouen with a smile, one that pained her to wear even as she felt her lips quiver.

"I-I think—" The small hesitation cost her as Masami's grip on her wrist tightened ever the slightest. Enough to send a message while being discreet. "I am quite tired. I might just take Masami's suggestion and finish tomorrow early."

Kouen's expression didn't change but Ceara could tell there was something he caught onto— _please notice._

"Are you certain you will be able to finish in time?"

It was a silent game of charades—one they had played before—and Ceara wanted for him, now more than ever, to hear what she couldn't possibly say.

"I am," she replied. "B-But I assure you that it will be done before morning. I'll work to have it done by the usual time."

 _Notice, En. Please._

Ceara knew that it was impossible to escape from Masami now. But the way Masami was acting—so much differently than before—frightened her. She knew she could endure a few hours of Masami's punishment as she was—hopefully—but a whole night…

 _I have a really bad feeling about it._

After a few seconds of quiet, Kouen nodded and excused them. With tears threatening to fall as she left, Ceara braced herself for the worse. But she doubted that that would scratch the surface of what was to come.

* * *

Her room seemed darker than before with what few oil lamps had been left on but Masami didn't seem to need to see to throw Ceara, hurling her by the grip on her wrist. Mindful of her surroundings, Ceara barely managed to steer her fall away from the bed's edge and onto the bed itself. It still hurt just not as much as a badgering against a wooden post would have. Quickly, she stood back up only to meet Masami's maddened expression.

"You little rat."

"Masami—"

"You sneaked your way in?" she hissed, grabbing onto whatever was closest and throwing it at her. Unable to speak and dodge at the same time, Ceara opted to do the latter and avoid the vase that shattered against the ground. "I knew it was only a matter of time before you whored your way to Prince Kouen like that!"

 _She saw._

There was no time to refute her accusations, though, as more of her things began to fly across the room towards her. Ceara chose to focus on avoiding them instead of talking and got to hear Masami's unfounded logic while doing so. "I knew it was only a matter of time before you did so. But it doesn't matter. Whatever you do won't change anything. No, it's worse that you dared get help to speak again."

"Kouen found that out himself," Ceara countered stepping around the bed to put some distance between them. "He offered—"

"And you had no right to accept!" Masami shouted not caring about the volume of her voice. "You've ruined so much! All the work I've done reduced to this. You've whored your way, gained so much favor, and now think you're so untouchable, don't you?"

"If you would list—"

"Be quiet!"

No matter what Ceara tried to say, Masami wouldn't listen; not like she expected her to listen in the first place with how livid she was. But Ceara at least wanted to try because this time she wasn't just going to submit to her punishments as willingly as before. She felt scared, yes, but there was no way she was going back to just sit by and take it. But Masami was quicker and despite her hearing, Ceara found herself more preoccupied about not hurting her by accident that she didn't notice the knife until it was already too late to avoid it. The wound on her leg wasn't deep but it wasn't normal either. It burned and it instantly began hurting.

A few seconds of walking back after the slash was all it took before Ceara couldn't support herself with that leg. The numbness came so suddenly that at taking a step backward she scrambled to the floor barely holding onto one of the poles from the canopied bed to remain upright.

 _What in the hell?_

"You shouldn't talk," Masami hissed as she began walking towards her. Ceara scrambled back with the one good leg she had trying her hardest to remain upright, pulling herself up with the canopy bed poles as support. At seeing this, however, Masami aimed at one of her arms and gave a wide slash that caught her by the forearm. And just like her leg, all sensation left her arm in less than a few seconds; in the blink of an eye, she couldn't feel it, much less use it to grab the wooden post. Unable to reach out with her other hand in time, Ceara fell down on the hard floor.

 _It's coated with something..._

"You never were supposed to talk again." Masami crouched down in front Ceara and before she could even move away, she plunged the knife deep into the thigh of her other usable leg. Ceara hissed and pushed her back with her good arm, making Masami pull the knife out at an angle, making the cut deeper.

"You pathetic, little girl," Masami muttered under her breath and quickly stood back up to stalk her as Ceara tried desperately to pull herself away with her one working arm. But the dead weight was much too heavy for her one arm alone. Whatever poison coated the blade of her knife, it was acting faster and hitting her much harder than any others Masami had ever use. "You shouldn't bother running away. All you've ever been good for is being my cute little puppet. And now you rebel against me, threatening to cut your strings, thinking you're strong enough for that?" She chuckled and shifted the knife in her hand letting the light hit it. As she did that, Ceara noticed the purplish hue that shone on the blade, a clear sheen of amethyst. "I don't know what delusions of grandeur you got after our time apart but let me assure you, you're not worth the damn air you breath. You don't deserve to be alive. You deserve to suffer for taking the life of my little Haku; you should stay there and receive the punishment you justly deserve!"

Masami launched at her but with the working arm she had, Ceara did what she could and smacked the knife, deviating it from her and making it fly off Masami's grip. The blade cut against her palm, though, and the poison did it's work fast. None of her limbs worked properly now.

"No, Masami," Ceara called out. Despite being unable to move any of her limbs anymore, she still felt compelled to speak. She'd been silent for too long. There was no way she would remain quiet anymore. "I'm deeply sorry for what happened to Kohaku, and I understand that I caused it, but I won't condemn myself any longer."

 _I've learned better._

"And I'll take responsibility for what I've done," she confessed fully. "But I won't let you continue doing this to me."

"What about us!" she exclaimed. "You took Kohaku from us—from me! You're a mistake that's brought nothing but suffering to us. You deserve this and more!" Without a warning, she plunged the blade into the side of her hip, the blade hitting and scraping against bone making Ceara gasp and cry out in pain, her vision blurring somewhat as she looked back at the crazed woman before her. The sudden rage that had consumed her changed into such a sudden calm that Ceara was baffled for a moment. With a clearing of her throat, Masami smiled and twisted the knife against her hip making her grit her teeth to deal with the pain that wracked her. "But all those trivialities won't matter for much longer. You might have opened this little box but you can still close it in time." Taking the blade out, Ceara could feel the warmth of her blood seeping from the injury and felt the numbness that was beginning to spread through her body at a much slower pace than before.

 _What—How?_

Masami crouched just before Ceara as she leaned against the canopy bed in her room, the sweet smile never leaving her lips. "Voice or no voice, you're still just a little servant girl under my command. As such I will ask, will you be my little obedient servant girl again or do I have to reveal the truth to them?"

Panic racked in her chest at the mere mention of what used to send her fully into submission. But unlike before, remembering the words of others—support and encouragement—helped her see that the threat wasn't as horrible as she had once thought.

"It'll happen sooner or later, Masami," she told her through her pain and gritted teeth. "They will find out...and I made a promise with Kohaku when I released her that I would tell Sousei and Suisei the truth."

 _They will know and I will be the one to tell them. Under my own terms._

The calm shattered again in that instant. Masami's face contorted to rage a split second before she plunged the blade into the outside of her left thigh. The numbness took some of the pain away from the initial wound but as it went deeper and she twisted again, Ceara couldn't help but shout. Her cry of anguish was cut short, though, as Masami yanked her by the hair to slam her face against the bedsheets, suffocating her screams. Twisting the blade again and pulling it out, Ceara could do nothing but scream into soft silks as she felt the warmth of her blood coming from the open wound.

It shocked Ceara to hear Masami chuckle as she lifted her head by her hair so that she could face her. Even with that, though, Ceara was beginning to have a hard time perceiving her in the dark with how blurred her vision had turned. And it wasn't going away. She could also feel the shallowness of her breaths; it was almost like something had a grip on her lungs and wouldn't let her breathe. And all of it was getting worse, fast.

"You may act all high and mighty, thinking you'll have the guts to tell them, but you won't. I know you too well." Another chuckle filled the room, and her hearing being as acute as it was, it caught the tapping of footsteps as Masami walked away, leaving her head to rest on the bed as she felt something hot begin coursing through her again. It was like molten lava—like the poison from months ago—but different. It hurt and then left only to come back and hurt worse than before. The constant coming and going of the pain barely let her listen to what Masami was saying as she paced the room.

"And even if you do have what it takes, you won't," she said with an airy tone to her voice that made Ceara want to puke as it mixed in with the agony. "Can't you just imagine?" she asked, feigning sadness with a frown on her lips. "Poor Sousei and Suisei knowing the truth: that out of revenge for your brother, you, who had conquered a dungeon unbeknownst to us, came and plundered the Reizei Household when they were young with the intention to kill all of us."

At hearing this, Ceara's breath stopped and her heart sank to her stomach with disgust. _What…?_

"That because you want us to suffer just as much as you had from Cael's death that one wasn't enough for you. That when you killed Kohaku, you took her place with the intention to destroy us from within." Masami feigned a gasp, a hand coming to lay upon her chest as if in disbelief of her own words. "And when I found out, you threatened to kill me or worse, kill them, if I ever said one word about who you really were. That through all these years I've been but a pawn thrown around by you to accomplish the annihilation of the Imperial family that sent your brother to war and the family of its general, Reizei Koujiro, who failed to protect him. They would be...absolutely horrified and so, so heartbroken."

 _Unbelievable._

But even knowing that it wasn't true—that no one could possibly believe such ludicrous story—panic began to set deep in her mind. It settled there and spread like a plague, holding her sanity hostage.

"...n-n-no one will believe you…"

"Won't they?" she asked with a smirk on her lips. "Who am I but the firstborn daughter of the Reizei family, right? And what's more, who _wouldn't_ believe me when I have such strong evidence right—" reaching down to her head, Ceara felt Masami's fingers as they slid the hairpin out from her hair, letting it fall around her; the dread in her suddenly became too real. "Here." She twirled the hairpin in her fingers, a gleam coming off of it as the candlelight hit it. "After all, Kohaku's first dungeon was and has always been Beleth. Murmur only belongs to you, Ceara of Ériu. And that is an undeniable fact that not even you can change." Her grin widened and she stepped back as Ceara tried but failed to reach her even if she had to throw her body at her now that her limbs failed her. Ceara scrambled as she could, trying to reach Masami in vain. "And all I need to do is thread in enough pieces of truth to make it plausible. If there is truth, no matter how fictitious the rest is, it will create doubt. And doubt is all I need against you. Because who's ever going to believe a pathetic, little murderer like you over me?"

 _No. It can't be that easy._

But it was, and she had seen such thing work. What was Kou's introduction of itself into other countries but an erasure of the truth by a fabricated story? It worked and when played correctly, it worked extremely well. Ceara had no doubt that the tale that Masami had spun could most certainly put everyone against her. The truth wouldn't matter.

As she struggled uselessly to raise herself from the ground, nausea and despair began hitting her hard. From the corner of her blurry vision, just to the side of Masami, Ceara could see a faint silhouette. One that she recognized as a melting body—Hakuyuu—and when it spoke, the ruckus in her ears resonated with such dissonance that it hurt her ears. The melting figure strode forward so painfully slow and shakily that Ceara couldn't discern whether it was walking towards her or away. It wasn't until it came to be just beside Masami—who by this point had turned into a messy array of colors—that she saw the wicked sneer that spread on its face.

" _ **She can make them hate you before you even speak."**_

Terror spread in her as everything around her began to sway in her vision; this, sadly, didn't impair her mind completely and she could understand why the melting figure would say that. Even if she did tell the twins first, Masami was right. They would always believe Masami over her. It's how they were taught to think: blood ever thicker than water.

"You realize it now, don't you?" she asked with a faintness to her voice that she faintly recognized. It wasn't angered or indignant, just calm and collected. Just like Masami always was when she knew she had won. "They will only see you for what you have done: killing Kohaku, taking her place, and fooling everyone for your own selfish reasons."

A small part of Ceara's mind screamed at her—the one that had been nourished the past month, hell, past year—and gave her a very weak voice to speak with. "...It's not true. I-I cared for Kohaku more than anything. I cared for her...just as much as I care for Sou and Sui. That's something you will never be able to twist into such a horrid lie!"

"No?" she asked, "Then your disappearance for three months after Cael's death is nothing that they wouldn't question? After all, they both knew of Ceara, Kohaku's vassal, and they had seen Cael and you around. All I have to do is connect the dots on who you and Cael were; after that, I just need to tell them that you were so distraught and warped by revenge after losing him that you snapped and decided to avenge him by killing us all."

It wasn't possible. She couldn't spin that so morbidly and get away with it.

Out of nowhere, her stomach turned which for her to dry heave as the room spun in her eyes. At opening them back, she noted how another horrid apparition came to be by the corner of the room. Like Hakuyuu's melting body, this one wavered in its appearance—almost like fog—and pranced up to them, looking at Ceara over Masami's shoulder. The apparition's cobalt blue eyes stared down at her, her dainty lips in a jeering grin as Ceara stared up at Kohaku's wraith.

" _ **Yet she will. And oh so easily."**_

"See?" Masami said with a softness to her voice that seemed out of place. "It doesn't have to be true. It just has to be told correctly for it to become an irrefutable truth in their eyes. Once I do that, it won't be a matter of if they'll forgive you or not." A wicked grin came to Masami's lips and she covered it with her sleeve as a chuckle came from them. "It'll be a matter of whether they'll let the government execute you or do it themselves."

"Please...don't." Ceara had no idea what took over her—fear, desperation, dread, panic—but she didn't want it to become true. She couldn't just let Masami twist the truth when she had just began to get comfortable with the idea of telling it. "Don't poison them with so much hate. Even if it's against me, they shouldn't be forced down that path. You, out of everybody, should know how much it hurts to know the truth. Don't make it worse for them by lying to them."

"Well, that's out of my hands at this point," Masami answered. Walking up to the canopy bed, she undid the ropes that tied the drapes against the poles and held them apart, testing their sturdiness. "But you are right, I do know. Which is why I know what your answer will be to my offer." Ceara watched intently, or tried to, as Masami's disfigured image approached her while the foggy apparitions stood behind her like a horrid audience, mocking her. "So allow me to repeat it for you one more time—will you be my obedient, little servant girl or would you let them suffer and hate you just like I have?"

 _What kind of choice is that...?_

Both Hakuyuu and Kohaku sneered and sudden figures joined them, sprouting from the macabre shadows that the flames of the oil lamps made. Figures whose faces began to distort into some she vaguely recognized as soldiers—people she let die, that she killed herself. All of them crushed her under their scrutiny and mocking jeers. They were all her judges and jury. And by what she could see—a sight that brought tears to her eyes and utter torture to her heart—they had already handed their verdict to the executioner.

 **"One you can't refuse."**

Without another word, Ceara lowered her head and nodded once.

"Good," she heard her say while their cackles continued in the background. Warm hands came to her wrists, the contrast between them and her cold skin being so much that she felt every touch as it froze her. She felt the roughness of the rope wrap around her wrists and felt herself being pulled upward. It wasn't until she could remain upright, feeling the floor just inches away as her toes scraped against it, that she felt Masami tie her to the top of the canopy bed and against the pole to hold her in place. Giving it one more yank, Ceara winced at the odd sensation that having anything touch her skin gave.

It was hot and rough, like a serrated blade against her wrists and back, but at the same time numbing. Her vision, too—she could barely see anything at this point that wasn't right in front of her face. Everything except those ghouls. They remained to mock and gloat in their victory. She could feel how her lungs were beginning to constrict more and more. At that moment, despite feeling the pain that came from them, she couldn't move neither her legs nor arms. Whatever poison she had used, it had broken her to a point that she had never felt before.

 _And the people..._

This was completely surreal...but too realistic at the same time.

The worst was that it didn't affect her hearing. On the contrary, every sound was jarring and distinct—Masami's racing heartbeat, the cackling of the people—and that made things all the worse when she heard Masami's words as she brandished the knife and a vial of purple liquid.

"Now...be silent, little lamb."

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _Don't edit it yet, I told myself. You haven't written for the other story yet, I told myself. And yet there's this huge part of me that just won't let me work on anything else knowing I have this chapter in my google docs. Nope, my conscious has failed me. And so you have this._

 _Such highs and lows in this chapter, holy cow. I know it's only been like, what, a week since I uploaded the last chapter but hopefully this puts you guys on edge until next time. 'Cause if it doesn't, then I'm not doing my job right :D_

 _Anyway, I still want to thank everyone who Reviewed, Favorited, and Followed but because I don't have much time to do so individually, I'll give you all a huge 'thank you' and send you lots of hugs too! You guys make writing this so worthwhile and it gladdens me that you guys enjoy reading it as much as I enjoy writing it._

 _Speaking of writing, I have a little treat for you guys. It's a small omake that didn't really fit into the story. It's a fun tidbit about Beleth's Metal Vessel and hints to that little series I was talking about making in the future for Magi. So, before I let you guys go, enjoy this little morsel._

* * *

 **Omake: When A Sparrow Flies By  
**

 _ **Shika—8 years ago  
**_

 _I hear it._

There was no mistaking it. She clearly heard the chirping of birds around and not just any kind. She remembered hearing them before in the beach, soft and happy. And she wanted to go see where they were.

But…

She turned back to the desk where she had been sitting that was littered with papers. Homework from her tutors that she definitely didn't want to do. Especially when they were nothing interesting: etiquette, poise, embroidery. The only interesting bits were the history—if one could call what they had given her that—the calligraphy, and arithmetics. She missed training and learning about the economy, things she had studied briefly back in the Imperial Palace. But that had been already a year ago before the fire. Now General Koujiro didn't want them to return to Shika despite how much she and Masami had complained about it.

So they stayed home...and Ceara was already bored out of her damn mind. Despite being thirteen, her body was still growing at its own pace, ignoring what would usually be the norm for most girls her age. It was something she was glad for, at least, because Kohaku would barely be eleven this year.

Still…

Taking the small carnation hairpin from between the folds of her hafun, she caressed Murmur with one thumb as she laid on the floor of her room, staring up at the ceiling.

"I want to go out."

" _Then go, little one,"_ he said and chuckled. _"Not much stopping you but yourself."_

Turning over to lay on her stomach, Ceara glared at the door were she knew a couple of guards stood. She had already snuck out a couple of times from her quiet study time. Neither Koujiro nor Arianna had liked that. Now this was what she got for it.

"I can't." She huffed and planted her face on the floor. "The guards. They'll tell."

" _Come up with another plan. You're good for contingencies."_

"Contingencies?"

" _Plans for in case your original one fails."_

"I think that's more luck than anything," she mumbled but couldn't continue their conversation as the sound of the doors came to interrupt her. Not bothering to rise, Ceara only heard an airy chuckle that got her to smile and lift herself from the floor, knowing exactly who that was. "Ami-nee!"

Masami knelt before her as she stood back up. "Bored?"

"Yeah," she answered and turned to her desk only to stick out her tongue at the mountain of papers. "Etiquette is such a hassle."

"It is but it's something you must learn," Masami agreed. Ceara pouted at this but became curious when Masami turned to the door before leaning in to whisper to her. "But how about we go out for awhile?"

"Out?" Ceara repeated desperately needing that.

Masami chuckled but covered her lips with one finger to quiet them both. Once Ceara was quiet, Masami continued explaining, "For only a couple of hours but yes, so long as you promise to study hard after we return."

"Absolutely!" Ceara exclaimed and clapped her hands over her mouth before chuckling and nodding. "I promise," she whispered.

And like she had promised, Masami managed to get her and even Sousei and Suisei out into town. Because of the festivities of the new year, the town was pretty boisterous and even beyond the noise, Ceara could swear she heard the birds still. They were everywhere and they were giddily singing with the people.

"Kohaku!" Ceara turned about noticing that Masami and the twins had gone a few feet away from her. Running back to them, the twins, barely seven, giggled at their sister as Masami took their hands. "Don't go off and dawdle by yourself."

"S-Sorry!"

But it was really hard not to. The new year was something that the Kou Empire celebrated with a lot of glee. One of the few things actually celebrated when their culture was so lacking, it was a huge festivity that brought lots of the citizens together and brought a lot of jubilee to such quiet city. The fun she had for the few hours completely made her forget about her studies for a while, but as the two hours were coming to a close, she let herself fully relax and just enjoy the end of their outing.

The last thing they would watch, as per what Masami had told her, was going to be the dancing troupe that was in the city. Ceara was so entranced with it that she had just stood quietly up at the front with other kids as they danced, leaving Masami and the twins a bit behind. It didn't bother Masami much that she was way ahead since she could still see her and the twins were simply dancing along in place. After they were done, however, the crowd began dispersing way too quickly. Ceara turned back to Masami but she was more preoccupied with the twins not getting trampled instead. That left her to herself in the sea of people that only seem to be getting denser. Soon enough she lost sight of them as the people continued to come and go around her.

" _Get out of here, little king."_

"I'm trying," she groaned but as she was trying to push her way through, some person shoved her from behind and pushed her to the ground. Hard as it was to get back up with so many people walking through, Ceara struggled to even turn over from her back. "M-Masami!" she called out but there was no answer. She must be too far from Masami. And as more people began to go around or over her, Ceara began to worry that she would really be trampled.

"Oh, what'd we have here?" A lilting voice called above the ruckus a second before an arm wrapped itself around Ceara's waist. Out of the blue, she felt herself come off of the ground without much effort; Ceara could only watch and thrash as whomever had her took her out to the margins of the streets were there was space to breath. Once out of the crowd, Ceara was placed on her feet by the same hands that had grabbed her before.

Lifting her gaze, her stark blue eyes met bright, sharp eyes of an emerald sheen. They reminded her of an eagle's keen eye. It had been a woman that had helped her, a tall one too. Despite the cloak that covered her clothes, Ceara could tell they were foreign—not from Kou or even from the Eastern Isles—and her complexion was an olive color, as if the sun had kissed it, something definitely not seen around those places. Her long auburn hair hung in waves evenly as it was held up in a high ponytail with a tuft of feathers of a golden tinted crimson color sprouting from behind her right ear and hanging off and down like an ornament.

She was definitely strange and an outsider but the second that she grinned, Ceara felt like the sun had just shone down and a soothing calmness struck her. The woman crouched before her and wiped away at some dirt on Ceara's face before speaking.

"Careful, kiddo," she said, her voice lilting almost as if she were singing. "You almost got trampled there. Where're your folks?"

"My sister and baby siblings," Ceara corrected, thinking she understood the colloquialism the woman had used. "I came with them, not my parents. I got lost when the crowd broke."

"Ah, I see," she called and stood up to look about the place. The crowd had begun to dwindle but there was still a sea out there that would certainly impede her from looking for Masami and the twins. "And I surmise they'd be smelling like you too then."

 _Smell?_ "E-Excuse me?" she asked unable to believe what she'd heard.

The woman turned back giving Ceara the same toothy grin from before, the feathers behind her ear shining like gold in the sun and slightly perking upward. "Your smell, kid—like mint and 'nilla from a library with a good ol' collection."

 _What's 'nilla?_

" _Vanilla, I would suppose,"_ Murmur suggested sounding just the bit confused as she was.

"No worries," the redhead woman told her while folding her arms before her and lifting her nose into the air. "They're still here and coming along this way by the smell of it." She turned her head to the right and grinned, "Told ya."

Following her line of sight, Ceara turned over to see Masami popping in and out of view from among the crowd. Happy to see that she wasn't as lost as she had thought, she began heading to her but stopped briefly.

 _I need to thank her._

If not for her odd help then at least out of common courtesy. Turning, Ceara opened her mouth to speak but found nobody behind her. The space where the woman had been was completely empty and even looking through the crowd, Ceara saw nothing but nameless faces.

A faint glint of gold caught her eye and she glanced downward. Right near her, a feather hovered, swaying back and forth as if it had just fallen from a bird and landing at her feet. Bending down, Ceara picked it up and let the sun hit the bird's feather—it was gold with the ends tinted in slight crimson.

 _Like the woman's feathers._

A sudden gasp escaped her when the crimson of the feather began to spread like ink and cover its golden hue. Within seconds it had changed completely and was now a normal red feather and much lighter than before. She examined it all around unable to understand what had just happened.

 _What in the—_

"Kohaku!"

Instinctively, Ceara hid the feather within the folds of her hanfu, next to Murmur, before turning to Masami who was red from all the running and dragging the twins around. The tiny toddlers whined about it being too hot and being tired but Masami was more focused on Ceara as she began to scold her for not keeping close to them. Ceara took the scolding knowing that she deserved it but as they made their way back to the Reizei Estate, she couldn't help herself from thinking about the strange woman that had helped her.

She shone bright, like the sun, and it was hard to look at but even harder to look away.

And the feather…

As she sat in her room back in their estate, trying to study, Ceara couldn't help a thought away as she stared at the small jar and feather pens on her desk. Bringing the red feather up and overlapping it over the rest of her pens, she tilted her head curiously.

 _I wonder how hard it is to make a pen._

* * *

 _Cute. And it's also kinda sad to see how the relationship with her and Masami used to be back then. Anyway, yeah! Short but adorable._

 _As for updates, there won't be any anytime soon. This time for sure because I don't have anything written nor an outline for the next chapter, although I do have a good idea of what I'll write. Anyway, now I can let you guys go properly. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and stay tuned for the next update._


	12. Opened Floodgates

_**Chapter Twelve:**_

 _Opened Floodgates_

* * *

Dawn came within a few hours, the sun rising and kissing the lands of Balbadd, yet Kouen felt there was a qualm infesting the sanctuary that was his study. Despite the usual calm that such reclusive ambiance brought to him, Kouen couldn't fully enjoy it like he usually would. Unease gnawed at him and did so the most the few minutes prior to sunrise.

" _B-But I assure you that it will be done before morning. I'll work to have it done by the usual time."_

Usual time—surely he understood the underlying meaning of her words correctly. It had been a little less than four hours since Ceara left with Masami. He had yet to understand why she had lied about work but Kouen could tell that fear had something to do with it. The horrified look in her eyes—he'd seen it before as a mere ghost in her gaze, lingering and never receding. After finding out the truth, he assumed that fear had been about being discovered. And he had been right for the most part. Yet there was a small part that hadn't been accounted for until last night. That fear had been prominent the moment Masami barged in.

 _She's scared of Masami._

What he wanted to know now was why?

"My brother and king?"

Raising his head from the scroll he'd been reading for the past ten minutes, Kouen met his younger brother's eyes. Unlike his that resembled their father's more, Koumei took most after their mother. Every time Kouen saw his brother serene or concerned, he could almost see their mother's earnest gaze portrayed on Koumei. He could see those same eyes now as Koumei stared wide-eyed and somewhat puzzle.

His head tilted, Koumei spoke up. "You stayed?"

"Couldn't sleep," Kouen simply replied. "You've woken quite earlier than I expected you to."

"Yes," Koumei agreed, massaging the back of his neck. "I wanted to get preparations started." At raising a questioning brow, his brother didn't waste time and explained what he meant. "The Reizei siblings will arrive tomorrow."

"Masami already arrived."

"She did?" Koumei asked rather surprised. He tapped his chin a couple of times with his finger, brow furrowed in confusion. "Odd. The ship that she was supposed to come with isn't set to arrive until three more days."

"It hasn't docked?"

Koumei shook his head. "None of the reports I have say it has."

That didn't bode well and it certainly made Kouen's uneasiness from before grow. How had that woman gotten to Balbadd without their fleet? By all accounts, it shouldn't make sense. Eager to put an end to this ever-growing qualm, Kouen stood and motioned for Koumei to follow him. Puzzled, he obliged and walked beside him as Kouen exited the study and led the way to Ceara's chambers. Despite Koumei's queries about his sudden behavior, Kouen remained silent and instead focused on settling what irked him so much.

The instant they turned the corner, it appeared Koumei understood where they were headed."Eriu's?"

"Reizei Masami came and the two left the study last night," Kouen explained. "Eriu lied to me—fabricated an excuse in order to leave. For what or why exactly, I do not know." But he had his suspicions—for a while now, actually—and for once, he hoped to be wrong.

The detail that had been assigned to her being notably absent from their post was the first red flag. He heard Koumei muttering his puzzlement as well. Bringing himself to it, he opened the doors to the receiving room and found it empty. Not surprising but that wasn't enough to settle his mind which prompted him to barge into her room. Surprisingly, it was just as empty as the antechamber was; everything seemed in order except for the thin drapes of the canopy bed covering it all around and the scent of smoke in the room. It was Koumei who pointed it out, having heard a noise near the bed, which prompted both to approached it.

It took Kouen pulling the drapes apart to find Ceara in her horrid state—hanging by her wrists tied up on one of the canopy posts, her body barely covered with the stained sheets from her bed but not enough to hide the numerous wounds that marred her—proved the worst of his suspicions. Turning sideways to Koumei, Kouen could see the shock that he hid well in his brother's eyes but quickly snapped him out of it.

"Bring the healers and guards." Koumei didn't hesitate at his brother's stern orders and left the room to find what he'd asked for. Turning back to the young woman that hung injured, he unsheathed his sword and brought it up to cut the ties. Once free, her body fell limply, making Kouen lean in to support. At the mere contact, though, she began struggling, frail as she was, kicking and slapping him away. The hits were nothing but harmless punches yet she kept fighting. She didn't want to be touched. Regardless of that, he tried to placate her to see if her injuries were as bad as they looked. As he did so, he felt the heat seeping from her body; it baffled him seeing how pale she was, too. Drawing the sheet slightly back, he was able to assess her wounds better. Most were shallow cuts, although numerous, with only a couple deep enough to cause some major blood loss. Those didn't worry him much as he laid Phenex's metal vessel near her body to begin healing the wounds. What did concern him was the way her barely opened eyes were fleeting around, unfocused. Despite the shock that finding her in such state had given, Kouen had noticed that she had been somewhat conscious. She'd been talking and looking around the room, but those were mutterings to herself and her eyes seemed to be scanning everything around her. He could deal with wounds, but whatever was happening to her internally, he wasn't so sure.

" _My king."_

"What happened?" he asked aloud.

" _My apologies but I cannot heal her completely."_

"How is that possible?"

" _I've healed her wounds—most blood loss has been stopped as well—but whatever is causing her fever and hallucinations, I cannot stop."_

Hallucinations; it did explain the erratic mutterings and fleeting sight. "Do you know what is causing them?"

" _No,"_ she said with a murmur. _"What I managed to discern was it's overall toxicity. It's a rather powerful poison."_

Poison again. What bothered him most was that Phenex, a djinn, could not heal such human borne weapon. "Heal and ameliorate what you can for now, Phenex." The djinn obliged and the coral-colored bird sprouted from his ornament as she began healing what she could.

Her wounds had healed for the most part, leaving the scars of the gaping holes that had been left on her hip and thigh, but the fever and hallucinations weren't subsiding or lessening. If anything, they were worsening. It was after minutes of his constant healing that he heard the doors of the room open again. Instead of it being Koumei and the healers like he had hoped for, Masami stepped forward gasping at witnessing the state of her sister. The woman started screeching and crying loudly and the noise at such time was greatly irritating him.

It wasn't until she started approaching the bed that he finally paid any attention; stopping the healing, he turned about to set her back. She stopped in her tracks, her eyes wide and glassy, but something about her still bothered him.

"W-What's happened?" Masami cried out unable to catch a good glimpse of Ceara as Kouen stood between the bed and her. "You were healing her, w-weren't you? What happened to my sister?"

"She was attacked," he offered. Nothing specific, not like he knew any, but he needed to word his sentences well if he wanted to test his suspicions. Understandably, Masami gasped and the tears began to fall. He didn't bother with her and instead turned to begin healing Ceara again. "What time did you leave her last night?"

"T-Time?" Masami hiccuped for a while, thinking, until she replied. "I was only here a-an hour or two."

"Why are you here this early?"

"I wanted to take her to breakfast," Masami answered sheepishly but with the answer quite at the ready. "Why are you asking me all these questions instead of finding the monster that did this?"

"We will." Kouen glanced over his shoulder at hearing Koumei's voice ring through the room. Accompanying him were Chu'uun and a group of healers with the latter group hurrying to the bedside. Kouen ordered them to take her to the infirmary ward, telling them what he found with Phenex, but the moment they tried to touch her, Ceara began acting out. The healers stepped back as she started throwing weak punches and feeble kicks at midair. All her hits were aimless and frail but just as incessant as before.

Kouen clicked his tongue and laid Phenex's ornament close. The coral-colored bird appeared once more, its wings cradling her head and soothing whatever pain she seemed to have. It calmed her enough for her to stop struggling but her muttering continued just as unintelligible as before. Once calm, the healers took their chance to work on lessening the fever that ravaged her mind.

"Please, help her!" Masami cried wanting to walk forth to the bed.

"Stand back, please," Koumei told her politely. "They are working, so let them. Panicking won't help here."

She grunted and stepped aside, giving her back to them. At doing so, Kouen spotted a glint of silver that stuck out from her sash; a piece he recognized.

"That hairpin." Hearing him speak, both Koumei and Masami faced him confused at what he meant. "Why do you have it?"

"Hair…" her hands went behind her back a second before frowning. "She gave it to me as a gift."

"That's not possible," Koumei told her. She eyed him wearily and as response, Koumei looked askance at his brother. He'd spoken out of turn but both Kouen and he knew a lie when they heard it. And whatever web Masami was trying to weave, it wouldn't pass by them. It would only serve to entangle her more.

"What is this you're implying?" she asked, fingers slightly fidgeting at her side.

Kouen had to think for a second about what to say next. If his suspicions were correct, and knowing the temper of both women, a simple insinuation would be enough. A risky twist of words if he was wrong which he could deal with. But if he was not...

"No more lies," Kouen spoke out turning to Masami. "I know what that hairpin is and I know for a fact that you would need to pry it out of her dead hands before she gave it away." A sudden glint passed Masami's dark eyes as they narrowed at his approach. "And from the looks of it, she is at that doorstep."

"Your highness—"

He didn't let her contend with his words. "Poison was used to do this to her. Just like it was used before the Baise expedition. For Baise she refused to name her assailant; it wasn't until afterwards when she recounted the circumstances of that hairpin, and some persuasion, that she confessed the abuse had been ongoing for a long time." As he was now, Kouen stood before Masami who was now backed against the dresser in the room, the items on it rattling as she bumped into it. "And she named her abuser."

There was silence in the room even with the healers worked diligently to lessen a fever that wouldn't come down. Kouen didn't relent his stern glare at the woman before him, her eyes fleetingly scanning his expression. The front lasted a fraction of a second before the worried facade shattered, replaced by a face of pure ire.

"You knew?" she said through gritted teeth. It wasn't until that anger settled and broiled in her that she had the gall to step forth and shove him aside, barely moving him an inch with the attempt. "You knew and you haven't executed her!?"

 _There it is._

Sometimes he hated being right.

"She's a valuable asset for the west front," Koumei spoke up. The fact that he didn't sound nor looked confused about what she and Kouen spoke of only served to add fuel to her anger.

"Valuable?" she spat in disgust. "She killed my sister!"

"And her trial will be delayed until after the conquest of the west is done," Kouen told her. But at being called over by the healers, he stepped back and left Koumei to deal with her. Ceara needed to be transferred quickly, they informed him, to be examined by magicians.

"Whatever it is, we cannot heal it, your highness," one of them told him.

"Then do what you must," he replied.

"How can you say that!?" Masami exclaimed, stepping forward yet again but being stopped by Chu'uun from approaching any of them any further. "She's a murderer and a menace! She should die!"

"That's not your decision to make," Kouen told her.

"And neither was it in your right to inflict such punishment," Koumei added. With a swift nod in Chu'uun's direction, the Household Member reached out to Masami who jumped out of his grasp and glared back at the two brothers.

"She's property of my household!" she told them. "I have every right to do with her as I please."

"Whether it be a servant or a slave, it is law that neither shall be inflicted punishment upon by their masters." Masami glared daggers at Koumei while he appeared not the least bit repentant of his accusations. "As such you will be punished."

For an instant, Kouen saw a flicker of panic rush through her eyes as she stared at his brother. It wasn't until she turned to him and locked his gaze that something akin to hope filled them. "You can't punish me. I'm still your fiance. You can't have the First Prince's fiancee jailed or executed!"

Kouen couldn't keep the scoff that left him and neither could Koumei hold back a long sigh before turning to her once more. "The argument you pose is null. You are correct that execution is farfetched. But as for you being unable to be imprisoned due to being my brother and king's fiancee...you couldn't be more wrong."

"W-What?" she stuttered in complete disbelief.

Having had enough of this roundabout and wanting to have all this over with, Kouen spoke up to put one last nail on the coffin. "The head of the Reizei Household negotiated a new agreement. In exchange for negating the marriage and for their sister to have a choice on whether to remain as General of the Southern Armies or not, Sousei, as head of household, ceded the Eastern Isles to the Kou Empire. You and I are no longer tied by compromise or obligation."

The hope was completely erased from her eyes at those words. With her guard let down, Chu'uun was able to grab her by the forearm and keep her at bay until Koumei gave his orders. Kouen busied himself on what a healer told him, while the others struggled to get Ceara to remain standing. She was most lucid than before; she'd stopped muttering and fighting back seeing as they had lowered the fever enough for her to listen to them. Whatever poison was in her system, they would need to identify it and cure it, the healer told them. There was no telling for how long it had been in her but the sooner they could treat her, the better chances there were for her to survive. Those news, despite the bleakness, were good. So long as there was a chance for her to make it past this, they were good.

The quiet, however, didn't last.

"...use," Masami muttered under her breath. "So long as she's of use to you, she lives." She chuckled before trying to pry Chu'uun's grip from her forearm. Rage filled her eyes again but the pain in them made them tear up. When she couldn't relieve his grip, her free hand went behind her and dropped the hairpin onto the floor. "Then let's see how much use she is without these!"

Before anybody could stop her, Masami stomped as hard as she could on the old hairpin effectively breaking the silver piece. An instant later, a loud cry rang through the room as Ceara pried herself from the healer's hold. The strange surge of strength she got, managed to take her to where Marbas' vessel laid forgotten alongside Beleth's. Once in her hand, half her body changed into her equip a second before she lunged at Masami, throwing her against the dresser and smashing the woman's head against the mirror's glass. But the strength she got left her as quickly as it came as did her equip; still conscious, Masami shoved her away and fell down to a sit as the blood flowed. Ceara, still somewhat lucid, cried out while writhing in pain, shouting incorrigible sentences at her as tears marked her face.

Tired and sick of what was allowed to happen under his own watch, Kouen ordered for all to be cleared out the room. Chu'uun took Masami away to be treated and later imprisoned to await judgement as per Koumei's orders. Kouen helped the healers subdue Ceara to take her away despite her protests and her fever rising once again. She clawed and fought against them, tears streaming down her face and teeth grinding, as for once Kouen saw a pure, deep-seated hatred showing in her eyes.

Even in the infirmary, she kept struggling against the healers even after being tied down to be treated. Afraid that subduing her with drugs would aggravate the poison, Kouen found himself using Phenex to put her to sleep. It was only then that they managed to start work on her. Knowing that leaving it to them would be best, he exited the infirmary only to be met by Koumei.

"How does it look?" Kouen asked him.

"The hit cracked her skull." Koumei shook his head before massaging the back of his neck. "But aside from the pain, she will survive. What of Eriu?"

"Weak from blood loss, delirious from the high fever. Nothing concrete otherwise." Kouen crossed his arms before his chest and stared out at the palace grounds. Everyone was busy, trying to help her and what afflicted her, but even those who'd heard Masami's outcry had no clear idea of what accusations she had thrown around. "I healed what I could with Phenex but something else is causing her hallucinations and fever."

"Poison?" Koumei suggested.

"I'm assuming from what Masami said."

Koumei lowered his gaze for a second, thinking, until a thought came to him. "Did Eriu really accuse Masami of poisoning her?"

"No." Kouen sighed and looked his brother right in the eye. "I had previous uncertainties and saw it fit to pursue them at that moment."

"You took a huge risk accusing her," Koumei replied. "Had she not burst mad like she did, this could have ended badly."

"It didn't."

"Right." Koumei gazed back to the door of the infirmary. "But Reizei Masami's move does cripple her, both physically and on her usefulness. As she is now, Eriu cannot fight. Not mentioning the theatrics Masami threw destroying one of the metal vessels."

"Where are the others?"

"Safe with Seijin," Koumei replied. A tapping of approaching footsteps made both turn to catch said boy and Ka Koubun following Kougyoku as they ran breathless towards them.

The three stopped before them, Ka Koubun a few steps behind and somewhat out of breath, before bowing and saluting them. It was Kougyoku who didn't lose a second to inquire of what had happened.

"Nothing that should be of your concern, Kougyoku," Kouen assured her but it did little to calm her anxiety.

"May I go in?" she asked instead.

This time it was Koumei who answered her with a more soothing smile. "You can't. At least not now. She's still in a perilous condition; you must let the healers do their work."

Her shoulders slacked as her gaze fell. Seijin patted her shoulder for small reassurance before turning to Kouen and Koumei. "If it is no problem with your highnesses, may we await for news?"

"Do as you please," Kouen told him. Kougyoku gave them a small, tight-lipped smile before bowing and racing to the waiting room with Ka Koubun hot on her heels.

Seijin however stayed behind and spoke through gritted teeth, "What was done to my master is a most despicable thing." Raising his face, the boy looked at the two in the eye, pleading for an answer. "But I can't understand? Why would Lady Masami—"

"Don't think too much about it, Seijin," Koumei told him. "It's of no use."

"Y-Yes." The boy looked at the infirmary door before nodding. "You're right. Right now what matters is seeing that she gets better." He met them with renewed determination. "And rest assured, your highnesses, I will keep Beleth's and Marbas' vessels safe until she wakes up again." With that said, he left and followed after Kougyoku's wake.

Kouen promptly left thereafter with Koumei following after him. This time they arrived at Kouen's bedroom where he busied himself with changing from the slightly bloodied clothes he'd gotten. Koumei sat at the side, the look on his eyes telling Kouen that his brother was deep in thought.

"What's the matter?"

"Mm?"

"You're never this out of it," he explained as he finished dressing, placing his sword at his side. "What's bothering you?"

There was no hesitation and Kouen expected no less. Between them there was nothing but full disclosure. "The timing." Given the thought, Kouen could see why it filled his brother's mind but allowed him to talk on his own. Listening was what he did best, and listening to Koumei often brought out good outcomes. "The summit meeting is in a few weeks. With what's happened, and seeing how there's no telling how long it'll be until she recovers, she can no longer come with us to the summit meeting like we had planned."

That was true; they had planned to take her as part of the convoy to the summit. It wasn't in their best interest to leave her behind by herself while they were away. Despite the small show of confidence they had demonstrated, they had agreed that the best course of action was to keep that trust at a bare minimum. And that also implicated keeping his own head on what mattered and not on what he wanted. It was why taking her with them where she could be watched was the better option—it was what they had decided on. This greatly dented that plan, however.

"Not only that." Koumei took a moment to gaze at the floor lazily as he continued talking. "This attack seems planned: the limited contact with Shika we've received, the twins arriving tomorrow, and even Masami's own untimely arrival. This just appears too thought out to not have been arranged."

"Interrogate Reizei Masami as soon as she recovers," Kouen told him. "Inquire about how she got to Balbadd and the poison."

Koumei nodded. "I'll also ask how long this abuse has been going on and just how long she's known about Ceara of Eriu posing as Reizei Kohaku. After all, if she knew, no matter for how long, then she's just as guilty as we are."

Guilt. That seemed to be something a lot of them carried nowadays. But that changed nothing.

"Guilty or not, it does not matter at the moment. What does is finding out why, how, and who instigated this. And I want all this information before our departure."

"You will have it," Koumei assured him before standing up. With a swift bow, his brother left him to himself in his room. As Kouen was about to leave, the image of Ceara's maddened glare shot through his mind. But beyond that ire, he recalled seeing the grief that marred her from having seen the hairpin—a possession dearest to her—shattered to pieces.

Irreparable—he knew that much the moment the frail thing broke. Scouring through a small box he brought wherever he was, Kouen sought through the items to find a small pouch. Opening it, he dug in with his fingers and pulled out the first piece he touched. What he drew out was a broken piece of a carnation hairpin—the other half of the set that Ceara had lost. The piece he held in his hand was what had been given to him; it belonged to the young man that saved him. Cael had held onto it so tightly while fighting that he broke it, the pieces recovered by Prince Hakuyuu and given to him.

" _Don't forget their sacrifice, Kouen,"_ he had told him. _"Their lives matter just as much as yours or mine. They fight alongside us, they suffer like us, and one day we will die like them. Don't forget why we fight, Kouen, because if you do, their lives—and most importantly, their deaths—will have been meaningless."_

Kouen had kept those words in mind ever since. He turned the broken piece in his fingers, debating what to do. Silver _—_ silver pieces. Metal can be melted—reforged to serve a new purpose. And with her original hairpiece and metal vessel broken and unusable, she'd need a new one.

 _It should do._

* * *

 _What a tragedy._

Kougyoku couldn't remain still even as she sat in the waiting room adjacent to Ceara's. Only a few hours had gone by, breakfast time had come and gone, and no word or healer had left the room. Even after sending Ka Koubun to help with his Household vessel in whatever he could, there was nothing to be said about her condition. At times during the past couple of hours, Kougyoku flinched at hearing screams coming from behind the closed doors. And she knew for a fact that they came from her friend.

The doors to the waiting room opened and Kougyoku jumped out of her sit to find Ceara's vassal, a boy she knew as Seijin, walk in with a tray in hand and someone following behind him. With a small smile, the boy set the tray of tea and food beside Kougyoku's chair before bowing.

"You must eat, princess," he said. "It'll do you no good to starve yourself with worry."

"Mm." Picking up the pot and serving herself a mere cup, Kougyoku stopped briefly as the person who'd followed behind Seijin, a girl, pointed towards the sickroom. "Who is this, Seijin?"

"A magician, your highness." Seijin motioned his hand to her and she—girl surely no older than fifteen—bowed in her direction with a candid smile. The girl bore the clothes reminiscent to that of Kouha's magician vanguard, her hair a light shade of lavender and her eyes a bright shade of gray. Tucked between the folds of her clothes was a small metal wand encrusted with tiny pearls. "She's from Balbadd and joined Lord Kouha's vanguard of magicians."

"Parthevia originally, your highness," the girl corrected with a soft voice. Her cheeks colored a bit letting the paleness of her skin come alive. "My name is Parisa. It's an honor to meet you, princess."

"Yes, of course," Kougyoku muttered a bit confused. Turning to Seijin, she furrowed her brow and, as if knowingly, the boy answered her unasked question.

"Parisa is a magician that studied at Magnostadt before the war. Well versed in Life magic and plants."

"I still don't understand—"

"What's plaguing General Kohaku's health," Parisa interjected, fumbling a bit at interrupting Kougyoku but continuing when urged. "I'm well versed in poisons, your highness. Maybe I could help with the general's situation."

Not wasting time, Kougyoku walked over to open the door. Not prepared to see Ceara writhing in pain while bondaged and cursing to all high heavens, she turned aside to take a deep breath. But even that unsettled her stomach as nothing but alcohol and bitterness filled her nostrils. The healers and Ka Koubun halted in their work as they turned to their princess. Kougyoku took one step forth to introduce Parisa and voice her request.

"Allow her to help you."

"Your highness," one of the healers said. "With all due respect, your highness, we can do this. There is no need for a barbaric, not to mention foreign, magician to aid. We already have this under control."

"I dare object, seeing as anegimi is still suffering," Kougyoku replied sternly but a glance at Ceara's condition only served to remind her that right now it wasn't about who was right or wrong; it was about getting her better. "Just allow her to take a look at her. That's all I request."

The healers looked at each other before turning back to Kougyoku and bowing. "If that is what the princess wishes." With a nod, Kougyoku urged Parisa forth. Having confidence to work, the girl tied her hair up and took out her wand before standing beside Ceara's bed to attend to her.

Kougyoku turned to Ka Koubun as Parisa began her work. "Give her what she needs. Even if this ends futilely, we will hopefully at least gain some sense of what we're fighting." Ka Koubun nodded and listened to Parisa as she began listing off things that she needed for her examination.

With that set, Seijin accompanied her back to the waiting room where he served her food and a new cup of hot tea. Kougyoku sat and accepted the cup, feeling the warmth of the tea calming her upset stomach.

"Thank you, princess, for allowing this."

Kougyoku nodded with a smile. "If it'll help anegimi, I think we should try it." And she hoped that such an approach would help Ceara. As her friend, she wanted to aid in whatever way possible. And although she knew it was none of her concern, Kougyoku wanted to know why someone would do this. More specifically, she wanted to know why Masami would do this. Did she know the truth and hate Ceara because of it? If she did, then Kougyoku could fathom an idea as to why. But even so…

Harming another to this point, there was nothing just about it. Justice should be served, yes—even Kougyoku as absent-minded as she sometimes was recognized the kind of crime that the usurpation Ceara of Eriu carried out was. It was a crime and as such should be dealt with justly. But this—this wasn't humane. This was just vengeful and she felt that nothing good would come from it. For neither of them.

With such thoughts in mind, Kougyoku remained and for the first time in a long while prayed. She prayed to whatever god her people believed in—even to gods outside of her empire—to let everything be well in the days to come. She prayed for Ceara's recuperation and for her own patience of mind. The latter because, for some reason, Kougyoku felt she would need in the future.

* * *

"How does it look?"

Parisa didn't lift her head or concentration from the patient before her even after Seijin's call. It had been about half an hour since she began treating the young general but this had turned out to be a much tougher case than she first thought it would be.

"I can't say yet," she replied honestly. After doing her preliminary analysis of her current state, Parisa had found out plenty. Some facts the healers had already gotten: the cuts and wounds she had received had been the entry point of the whatever toxin plagued her body now, but since they were closed, there was no way of examining them for residue. By helping her, the First Prince had cut them off of a great source of knowledge. They had also constructed a vague timeline for her exposure; again, because of the fever, muscle paralysis and hallucinations, they had little to go on, but they had managed to mark her exposure within the last nine to twelve hours.

That itself, though, sounded quite inaccurate to Parisa. Because of the general's current condition—her fever spiking to high levels and her hallucinations worsening at times— an exposure this high lasting longer than eight hours would leave damage. The only way to prove prolonged exposure and damage was to assess her mental state. But since the patient in question was non-responsive there was no way to assure themselves of that outcome. And she had the inkling from the small intervals where her hallucinations were briefly gone and she would ask coherent albeit misplaced questions—sometimes about her siblings or about her djinn—that the general hadn't been that affected, if even, by a long-lasting high fever. That could very well mean that the fever wasn't the underlying cause but a symptom like the hallucinations and previous paralysis were.

Those were good news since it was better for them to be able to treat a symptom without fearing they would lessen her own body's reaction to whatever was inside of her. Bad news was that if the fever, muscle paralysis, and hallucinations were mere symptoms, something else was causing them.

Talking this out with Seijin, though, gave her some insight. "She's been poisoned before?"

Seijin nodded. "Some kind of plant original from Shika's shores."

"That's good."

"That she got poisoned?"

"That she's been exposed to others," Parisa corrected with a wave of her wand. From the vines wrapped around her wrists, a small piece grew outward until tiny blossoms fell from the overgrown plant that hung from her left pinky. Plucking one of the blossoms, she ripped the petals off and took the small seeds into a small bowl of water. Boiling it with a wave of her wand, the small seeds broke open from the intense heat, releasing an oil into the water that took a while to mix together. Parisa stirred the mixture until it became mildly thicker before taking a small spoonful. With Seijin's help, she got to open the general's mouth for her to force the mixture down her throat.

"What did you give her?"

"Medicinal flower that I keep handy," she explained. "It'll help with the fever and the weak muscles that suffered from the paralysis."

Seijin nodded as she told him this but was still caught on what she had said before. "Why is it good that she's been exposed before?"

"It strengthens her against any future exposure, including this one. Treating the symptoms that worsen it and having that in our favor gives us more time."

"Time for what?"

"To find out what toxin she was exposed to," Parisa told him.

"This isn't a toxin," one of the healer's said to them. "We have already thoroughly inspected her and found nothing of the like."

Turning back to the healers who had stood by, she faced them sternly. "Whatever this is, it's a toxin. I don't know how neither you nor I can detect it, but it's in her. It's ravaging her body and plaguing her mind."

It was the man that stood out from the others, the princess's vassal, that spoke up then. "But she's been in our care for almost three hours now. Had it been exposure to some toxin, the symptoms would have lessened. Instead, they've done the complete opposite."

"I know," she agreed. "But none of them point to a single cause. They're disparate effects with no common cause. We need to search the room where she was found. Despite being so unequal, my timeline and yours fall in some common ground: about four to five hours prior to finding her."

Seijin turned to the ceiling, losing himself in thought as he muttered incoherently under his breath. It wasn't until he recalled what he wanted that he turned back to them. "According to Prince Kouen, my master had already retired to her bedroom by then."

"We must search the general's bedroom, then," Parisa told him. One of the healers spoke out then, a small man with his back hunched over, mentioning that the Prince had also told them the same: this was some kind of poison. Which what prompted their search for one, but at finding nothing there wasn't much they could do but keep treating the symptoms. The young girl nodded understanding their place. "If Prince Kouen, who carries Phenex, concluded what I barely can with my own magic, then I think it's worth searching that room for any remnants of whatever could have poisoned her."

"Then while that is being done," the princess's vassal told them with a raised fan, "we shall continue treating her spiking fevers and muscle paralysis."

Parisa thanked him and turned to Seijin, "Please take me to that room." Without a moment's hesitation, Seijin broke into a sprint out of the room, excusing himself and Parisa as they bypassed Kougyoku. With the sprint they took, they got to the room that had left guarded so that no one could tamper with it. Thankfully, Kougyoku had followed out of curiosity and with her there, they were allowed access. At telling the princess what they were looking for, the three began to look around the room and antechamber.

But after wasting almost half an hour searching through every nook and cranny and finding nothing, the three were quickly losing hope.

"There's nothing here," Kougyoku said a tad bit out of breath from searching so diligently.

"Nothing," Seijin repeated and walked back to the bed. The sheets and bed had been left intact from that morning and were now dirtied with maroon stains. But aside from that there was no other mess, no signs of much blood. "The two deep wounds—they were on her stomach and thigh, weren't they." It wasn't a question but Parisa nodded all the same. "How much blood would she have lost had those injuries gone untreated for hours."

"She would've lost too much to survive," Parisa told him.

"Then why is this room so relatively clean?" Seijin asked with a raised brow.

Both Kougyoku and Parisa raised an eyebrow, the latter girl gasping at understanding. "Clogging. The blood was flowing out of the wound but if the poison was directly on it then one of its properties could have stopped the bleeding from being fatal."

"The poison saved her from bleeding out?" Kougyoku asked barely catching what Parisa said.

The young magician nodded vehemently. "A poison that causes paralysis, hallucinations, fever spikes, and slows bleeding."

"Do you know what plant it is?" Seijin asked hopeful at hearing Parisa's voice so uplifting.

"No," she deadpanned. "But there's only a handful that could cause that set of symptoms so quickly. We can treat her for all of them to delay the effects but we still need to know the exact toxin. Otherwise we'll just be shooting blanks at what's causing everything."

With a click of his tongue, Seijin narrowed his eyes while glaring at the floor. "We need to get that information from Reizei Masami."

There was a quiet after the name was called. It was Kougyoku that raised her voice to give her opinion on that matter. "She won't speak. Masami has recovered from the injuries she suffered but she refuses to say anything. At least that's what Koumei onii-sama said after going to interrogate her."

"We need to know," Parisa told her and Seijin. "Treating for everything will cost time and that's something we don't have."

"Can it wait till tomorrow?" Seijin asked.

"Twenty-four hours after exposure?" The young magician pursed her lips and shook her head to herself before lifting it to face him. "If treating the handful slows the effects she's already suffering from then I'd say...dawn would be pushing it."

"Then let's pray that they slow it down and that they get here before then?"

"They?" Parisa repeated with a furrowed brow.

It took Kougyoku a second to understand and it showed on the princess's face. "Sousei and Suisei."

Seijin nodded and took a deep breath. "If anybody can convince her to speak, it's them."

* * *

 _Stop._

 _Please, stop._

 _Just...be quiet._

Her eardrums rung constantly—hadn't stopped.

Her head spun, a blurry room swayed, and it hurt.

Moving did nothing. So she didn't move. Or did she not feel it? But what else could she try to do? All she wanted was for everyone to just—shut—up.

A bittersweet chuckle filled her ears and made her plea to have them cut off. She didn't want to hear her or anybody anymore.

" _ **Tough luck, Speirr. You have us now."**_

Something touched her—cold like ice—and it hurt. _I don't want you._ Another touch—just as icy cold, just as painful. _I don't want you!_

Another cackle came to them and she screamed—did she?—clawing at the figures that danced around, always near but never near enough.

" _ **So let us keep you company."**_

A small quiet hush came and drowned everything else. Suddenly she sunk underwater, drowning, but still breathing. Her head hurt even more; it felt ready to explode. The hush came again, drowning away any noise left.

Soothing; suffocating.

" _No good deed goes unpunished, Ceara. Remember that because yours aren't the exception, and they're just as fragile as you are."_

A scream left her then, she was sure of it this time. Claws took hold of her thrashing body—their touch this time like scalding fire pressing against her skin only making her struggle more. The inside of her throat burned as she tasted iron, and panic got her to thrash harder.

She wanted out.

And she wanted out now.

" _ **Fight all you want,"**_ the two wraiths cackled, accompanied by a myriad of others that clouded the small light that had been lighting everything around her. _**"Nothing will change—you can't change it. No matter what you do."**_

" _Fight it. Change it. No matter what."_

"P-Ple—ase." Was that her voice? It sounded foreign, distorted, and yet familiar. But above her voice, the cackling, and her own crying, she couldn't tell. "S-St...op."

 _Just be quiet._

* * *

Sousei needed to get out of that room. Pulling Suisei out with him, both twins stood in the antechamber of the sickroom where their sister thrashed in pain while shouting incoherencies. Kougyoku came closer to Suisei as the older twin cried into her hands, panicked and fearful. Sousei couldn't blame her—Kohaku had just recoiled from their touch, screaming bloody murder.

Prince Kouen had not meant his words lightly: she wasn't in her right mind—this wasn't their sister.

Struggling to swallow back his own tears, Sousei took a deep breath before he turned to both Imperial princes. It had stricken him as strange when Household Members of theirs had been waiting at Balbadd's borders to receive them that night. Arriving a bit earlier than scheduled, Sousei could guess nothing good would come of them expecting them there.

'Nothing good' didn't even begin to scratch the surface of what this their arrival to the palace, they had been immediately taken to the two princes who briefed them on what had happened and spared them no courtesy or compassion.

Masami had attacked Kohaku. Kohaku was in critical condition and spiraling down fast. And the only one who knew how to help her was their eldest sister who now was imprisoned in a room tightly secured. Appearances needed to be kept, or so Koumei told them, because the termination of the marriage had yet to be publicly announced. It wouldn't do to have Masami jailed like a common thief but that wouldn't mean that what she had done wouldn't be dealt with.

"Did she say why she did this?" Sousei asked dryly. It took him much to find a voice to speak and this was the best he could come up with.

"She's taken to her silence," Kouen explained. "When we asked about the poison, she made only one request."

"What was it?" he inquired.

"To speak with you and Suisei alone in exchange for all the information of the poison that she possessed."

"She's dangling her life on the line for that?" Suisei exclaimed, choking mildly on her own tears. "What the hell are we waiting for then?"

"A good question," Sousei said calmer than his twin sister. "Why did you not take us there as soon as we got here?"

"I know your sister would not want you to speak with Masami," Kouen told them.

"Her opinion is void on this," Sousei told him. "We will listen to what Masami has to say. But only after she tells us what she knows and as soon as Haku-nee recovers."

"She won't accept those conditions," Koumei added.

"She'll have to," Suisei growled through gritted teeth, her fists balled by her side. "Otherwise she can hang for all I care."

"Suisei." At Sousei's stern tone, his twin averted her gaze and instead took to Kougyoku like an anchor. "Frankly and with a due respect, what any of you think doesn't matter. She will accept my terms or I will obtain the information my way."

* * *

Understanding, Kouen took them to where they were keeping their sister. Where all this was concerned, he had few words to give. Suisei, much like Ceara, seemed too overwhelmed by her emotions to think straight, although she did have the right idea if he would say so himself. Sousei, however, had his head screwed on better but only by an inch. That underlying threat on his last statement had been more than clear and he was somewhat surprised that he could voice such hostility towards his own flesh and blood.

It wasn't strange just unexpected from what he knew of them.

He stopped briefly before the guarded room's antechamber. The guards informed them that Masami was there right now and had done nothing but dawdle around in meaningless conversation with any who approached her after Koumei's interrogation. When Sousei took a step forward to enter, Kouen stretched out his arm to stop him. "If you enter, bargaining your willingness to listen would be meaningless." Sousei understood and let Kouen enter alone.

The young woman sat primly against a cushioned chair while staring out of the window at the night sky over the palace garden. Wearing simple clothes rather than the elegant ones she was usually seen wearing, the casual dress didn't seem to bother her in the least. Neither did the ropes that bound her wrists, keeping them together and her restrained. She posed no danger to him either way but it was all protocol.

"Evening," she said unexpectedly before looking over her shoulder. "Oh, you. What do you want?"

"I'm here to speak on your siblings' behalf."

Her dark eyes narrowed at him and she stood from her sit. "Suisei and Sousei are here?"

"Arrived a few minutes ago," he told her. There was no point lying to her, not when only she had the information they needed. "I relaid your request from before. And—"

"And?"

He sighed at the interruption but continued nonetheless. "And both are willing to listen in exchange for the information you have first. And they will come to you after she shows signs of recovery."

Masami scoffed and turned halfway towards the window. "What kind of fool do they take me for? They know me better than that."

"Apparently not."

She clicked her tongue and glared his way. "You have no say in this. None of you do after what you've let pass. They should know the truth behind my actions. Whether she dies or not doesn't matter."

"It matters to the empire's poweress," he corrected her. "You interfered with that and it makes it our business. Now, whether or not you accept the terms given to you is your choice, but your brother did say he would attain the information his way if you refuse to cooperate."

"His way?" she chuckled. "His threats rely on powers that aren't his. And as she is now, I doubt any of her Household Vessels work. He can threaten me all he wants but my answer is no. They listen now or she dies. I have no qualms of letting the little wretch kill over."

The doors of the antechamber burst open when she finished that sentence and Sousei sprinted in followed Koumei, Suisei, and Kougyoku. Kouen knew he should've let them behind in the sickroom; at least there, they wouldn't have caused problems.

"Tell us what you used on her, Masami," Sousei growled.

"Or what?" Masami retorted. Sousei didn't bother with words to answer her. Instead, he unsheathed his sword and pointed it at her. Masami glared at it and then at him. "You dare raise that against me?"

"You leave me no choice," he told her, his hold tightening on the grip of his sword.

"Tell us," Suisei called with a loud voice. "What did you do to Haku-nee? Why did you do this?"

"I did it for you!" she yelled, stepping forth. "To protect you from that—"

"Enough!" Kouen shouted at the top of his lungs freezing everything in place. Turning to the group that had barged in, he barked his orders. "Leave, all of you." The tone itself told them he meant it. Koumei urged Kougyoku and the twins to follow him out. The twins glared at him for a second, equally confused and annoyed, but followed nonetheless. Once they were gone, Kouen turned to Masami and swiftly unsheathed his sword.

"W-What?" Masami scoffed but her stutter showed her underlying fear. "Are you going to threaten me too?"

"I've lost my patience with all of this," he confessed truly angered.

"That the lying whore you picked is croaking?" Masami chuckled at the absurdity of his words. "What a blessing in disguise."

"And I've lost my patience with you." Plunging his sword onto the ground, Kouen called upon Phenex. "Ring of Admonition." Despite no previous egg having been implanted in her, the Ring functioned all the same. The bloodlust and deep-seated hatred Masami held activated a small, immature ring around her head. The instant pain that she felt made her fall to her knees, grabbing at her head and shrieking. "Tell me what you used." Through gritted teeth and pain, Masami spat at his feet. The ring only grew as did the pain. "Now or die suffering from your own hatred."

"I-I'd rather d... _augh_ , die!" she managed to groan out.

"Then so be it."

But before he could fully let Phenex cast the ring on her, the powers of his vessel flailed as some energy ruptured through. It was short—he felt it pass through the room even—but it'd been forceful. Immediately after, Phenex deactivated and the ring around Masami's head crumbled, letting the woman breath as she laid on the floor. Despite the ring having broken, though, she still writhed in pain caused by something that Kouen couldn't see.

That fact alone was unnerving but he decided to take the opportunity in stride. Kouen raised his sword once more and plunged it down beside her head, "I have no qualms on killing you. Tell me now or I will let you die this time."

She was silent, choking on her own spit as she struggled to breath. But once she could something felt off. Kouen couldn't discern what but the woman that had been so fervently adamant to remain silent spoke through gritted teeth. The anger and madness was still clear in her eyes but _something_ seemed to compel her to speak the words she did.

"B-Brugmansia." He narrowed his eyes at her. She bit her lip but a pain wracked her until she spoke up again, this time with pain and tears in her eyes. "The flower—it's from the Dark Continent."

"What else?"

"T-That's all—I know! I swear!" The pain that had been plaguing her body then left as she took a hefty breath in before coughing vehemently.

"You better not be lying to me," he warned but took what he'd gotten and left the room. Telling the guards to attend to her, he occupied his mind with the information he'd gotten first. Reaching the sickroom, he found the group from before there. Ignoring them and heading inside, he saw the same scene he'd seen for the fifth time that day. Still as unpleasant as the first.

"Brugmansia, a plant from the Dark Continent."

The magician assigned to attend stopped in her tracks, her eyes narrowing at that information. It took a few seconds before she trotted off to a few books she'd gathered to get antidotes from. "There's little archived about Brugmansia. Flora from the Dark Continent isn't that well known."

"Can you make an antidote for it?" he inquired.

Parisa didn't hesitate to answer. "I will." Leaving that for what it was, he left them to do their work and returned to the group outside who stood anxious and ready. He only gave them what he'd obtained in order to calm their tension. "They know what's causing it. It should be easier to treat it now."

A collective sigh of relief swept across the room amongst the youngest ones. Koumei however seemed to read him like an open book. Motioning for his younger brother to come out with him, the two left the room as he led them out to the northern part were most barracks where at, and where, out of his own soldiers, some of Kouha's own vanguard had remained behind, including magicians.

"What happened?" Koumei asked as he trotted after his brother.

"I used the Ring of Admonition on her."

That didn't appear to surprise him like Kouen thought it would. "That explains why she conceded."

"It wasn't the Ring that made her yield," Kouen told him and stopped in his tracks, making Koumei stop before him. "Something neglected Phenex's powers and broke the Ring of Admonition—something else made her confess."

This time, Koumei's shock mirrored the unease he'd felt the moment it happened. "That's not possible."

"Apparently it is because it happened." Kouen motioned back towards the barracks where Kouha's vanguard was. "Take the vanguard of magicians, disseminate them across the palace perimeter. I want a shield capable of detecting magic coming in or out of these walls. Whatever did this, negated Phenex's magic with magic of its own and breached our security."

His brother didn't hesitate to oblige. "At once."

This wasn't normal. And it only made Koumei's words from before ring that much truer. This wasn't all a coincidence. This was too timely to be mere happenstance. No, someone was toying with them—causing all this. And he wasn't about to allow that, not on his watch.

Whoever dared flaunt themselves with such gall against the Flame Emperor would soon learn what dealing with him meant.

* * *

Dawn came but not much sunshine came through the open window. It was cloudy, the faint light that breached the clouds showering the courtyard and barely illuminating the inside of her sickroom. Seijin had left it open— _or had it been that little magician girl_ —because she had asked, having wanted to taste the air from outside.

Ceara didn't know for how long she'd been awake now—an hour, maybe two—but the time felt skewed in her head. At times her wakefulness seemed to extend by the days when it had only been a few hours; at other times her sleep would seem no more than hours when in reality she'd been asleep for most of that day.

Four days had already gone by according to her vassal and her mind remained scattered, still largely lost and dazed. Trying to piece together only brought parts to her mind, parts that never seemed to fit together.

She remembered what brought her to this plight or more like who. She hadn't heard anything about Masami just that she was imprisoned. But that was when she heard anything at all. Because of her constant spells of lethargy, she barely saw anyone. It had been luck that on the few times she'd woken up in the middle of the day, somewhat capable of understanding the time and place of where she was, that Seijin was there. He was the only one she'd seen so far and she was saying that with the little certainty she still had.

In spite of the incessant pain from before greatly lessening, her mind had yet to recover into any decent shape. Time fled her as she lost chunks, she slept more and remained awake less, and the mirages...

" _ **Mirages?"**_

Ceara's breath hitched at hearing Kohaku's voice and completely stopped when, at lifting her head, she saw the specter at the foot of her bed. Not wanting to listen, she hurriedly covered her ears and cowered back until her back hit the wall. She curled and buried her face against her knees but nothing seemed to deter them.

" _ **Come now, Ceara,"**_ it said in Kohaku's sweet voice. The sound of it, however, hurt her ears. It sounded similar but not exactly. She could tell with certainty that this wasn't Kohaku. It wasn't her. _**"We're here; we're real. Why can't you accept that?"**_

"...you're not real…" Ceara muttered through gritted teeth, biting the inside of her cheek as distraction. "...you aren't real…"

" _ **Shh, Speirr."**_ Cael, but his voice sounded distorted. It wasn't him. _**"Rest; sleep. Let us accompany you."**_

"Leave me alone…"

" _ **We won't, little Speirr."**_ Hakuyuu. But it was that same gurgling and guttural noise from the wax carcass. Ceara didn't want to see that grisly thing again. _**"Because without us, you'll end up alone. And you know that. That's why you beckon to us. That's why we answer."**_

"...I don't..." she muttered, her voice cracking as a sob escaped her. She just wanted quiet.

 _Please, just—_

"How about letting us have some peace and quiet for a moment?"

A lilting voice she didn't recognize bounced in her eardrums, one that didn't sound distorted or full of ill will. Opening her eyes she hadn't realized she'd shut, Ceara lifted her head to see a young man making his way across the room and around her bed to reach the bedside table that held the medicines and food that was brought to her.

His long golden hair was plaited loosely at his nape and tightened neatly into a fine end that ended around his knees. Vibrant yet solemn amethyst eyes gazed her way while he gave a warm tight-lipped smile to her. The warmth and lightness of his presence grabbed her attention and soothed her; it certainly took away from the large burn scar that wrapped around his neck, almost like a pair of hands gripping it tightly. He wasn't any of the healers she'd seen in her times awake, at least none that she could remember seeing. But the fact that he was so peculiarly dressed also caused her some uneasiness.

Despite all this, though, her skeptical mind rose to be heard: Y _ou're sick. You're not better yet. This is another hallucination. It isn't real._

But her lips and voice still worked in accord against her mind. "...who…"

The man smiled, raising a hand to halt her quiet question. Reaching out to the bedside table, he took a glass and filled it with water. With a small touch of his fingers against the bottom of the glass, Ceara watched as the water cooled with small bits of ice beginning to form in it. Once done, he passed the glass to her but Ceara refused to grab it. It would just disappear.

He smiled and chuckled before reaching gently for her hands and wrapping it around the cool glass of water. "Drink. It'll do you good."

 _What's happening to me?_

Maybe it was a real person, but not the person she saw. Maybe she was just imposing the blond man's face on somebody else—someone real who was actually there. She couldn't understand why her mind would choose a face she didn't recognize, though. But that excuse, whether true or not, was easier to believe.

Looking down at the glass and crystalline water, she took a few sips liking the coolness that soothed her sore throat. Sip by sip, she finished the glass with sigh.

"Thank you," she whispered, her throat hurting a little less.

"My pleasure," he replied, taking the glass as she gave it back. Setting it aside, he walked closer to the edge of the bed before taking a sit at the opposite end of where she sat. "How do you feel?"

"Strange," she replied. "I feel...weak, no matter how much I rest. I see things, too. Am I going crazy?"

"No." The lilt in his assurance along with his smile placated some of her restlessness. "Your body and mind both suffered greatly. Even if you were only exposed for one day, Brugmansia is a potent poison. It could have killed you."

"Why didn't it?"

"They figured out how to treat you," he told her. "You just need to rest for now, Ceara. Sleep and get better. There's much to be done once you're well again."

Ceara's brow furrowed at the odd statement. "What do you mean?"

The warmth that had sparked in his eyes dulled, his smile leaving his lips as he pursed them. "Threats are rushing to destroy what you have built. This—this was but a welcome. You must rest and recover as soon as you can."

Cryptic as the message was, her muddled mind couldn't decipher what he meant. Shaking her head, Ceara held onto it and buried her face against her knees as she tucked her legs closer.

 _This isn't real. It is just another hallucination._

But the warm hand she felt stroke her head told her otherwise. Afraid of how this could mess with her mind, playing with her sense of reality, Ceara shut her eyes tightly and refused to lift her head. Nonetheless, her ears still heard his lilting voice.

"I don't mean to rush you," he whispered. "But you must recover. You must act fast or you will regret not having done anything against those that threat what you've built and love." The hand lifted from her head and all at once a small pressure left her chest that let her heart beat normally. Raising her head, Ceara found herself truly alone for the first time since she could recall—no blond man, no wraiths.

It was finally quiet.

And she'd just imagined it all.

Holding tightly to her head, Ceara balled herself under the sheets of the bed and sobbed. She wanted to get better. She wanted to be sure of what she saw with her eyes as her ears failed her for the first time. Everything sounded real, not everything looked that way, though.

Not until this one.

 _It isn't real. It isn't real._

She repeated those words in her mind, shutting herself out from everything else on the outside. Repeating it didn't conceive her any sleep but it at least kept her better company than the voices that haunted her.

* * *

"You're really going?"

Sousei sighed for a moment as he turned up to face his twin. She was furious, as was he, but Sousei was better at controlling his emotions than she was. Understandably so, too. Even nine days after having returned and taking care of Kohaku after her poisoning, their sister was still not completely healthy.

Physically, yes. She could walk again and did so inside the confines of her sickroom and always supervised by a healer. Mentally, however, she was far from well. The poison had been removed from her system as much as magically possible, but the small remnants still afflicted her. Most of the times now, she was aware of who they were and what they were doing there. On the rarer times, however, she cowered and shouted for them to 'leave her alone' saying that she wanted the room to 'be quiet.' It was like a different person each time.

But the magician that had been in charge of the poison extraction and her treatment, young Parisa, had told them that at most it would take a few weeks for whatever was left to fully run through her body. Once gone, whatever remained would be repercussions from the damage done. That could range from mild to frequent but they could be dealt with.

She said that what was important was their sister had survived, and he agreed. Now that she was relatively better, however, he and Suisei had a bargain to uphold.

"We owe her nothing."

Sousei sighed as Suisei brought that up for the tenth time. He wished it could be that simple but something told him that it wasn't. His gut urged him to talk with their eldest sister because despite what she had done, she was still family. Part of the broken one that they still had left.

"We owe her Haku-nee's life, Sui," he corrected her. "Had Masami not confessed, Kohaku would have—"

"Had Masami not assaulted Kohaku, we wouldn't be having this conversation in the first place!"

 _Brilliant point._

But inconsequential from where he stood. As head of their household, Sousei had to deal with this issue. Ameliorate as much of the problem as he could. Hopefully avoid any plans of execution the imperial princes could have come up with, too. He definitely had his work cut out for him.

"Agreed," he confessed. No matter how unbiased he wished he could be, Sousei still struggled with keeping political and familial issues separate and that they were practically one and the same didn't help his case much either. His agreement came from a slight slip of consciousness; that had been Suisei's younger brother talking. But he couldn't be that baby brother right now. Right now, he needed to be that pillar of authority that he had been bred to be. That pillar of authority that he abhorred being. "But I won't sully the trust placed on me. She held her end of the bargain—how or under what duress shouldn't matter—and we will do the same."

"Don't expect me to follow with whatever morals you grew overnight," Suisei retorted with a frown.

"I don't expect you to," he replied. "It's an order." She gasped at that sentence and her anger tripled. The state she was in, however, didn't allow her to speak clearly. "Believe me, I hate this as much as you do but _we_ have a duty to fulfill."

Suisei raised a finger but lowered it when Sousei gave her a grim tight-lipped grimace. "I hate this. And you for making me do it."

"It'll be harmless," Sousei assured her. "Whatever Masami says won't ever justify what she's done."

His sister scoffed and nodded, "Damn right."

That bridge having been crossed, Sousei sheathed his household vessel onto its scabbard by his hip and urged Suisei to follow him as he left the room. It was early in the morning and a good time to get this talk over with. Nobody would overhear except maybe the guards stationed outside the room. Even that could be easily nullified by Sakhiba Shafarat making the room soundproof. Nobody but them would hear whatever it was that Masami wanted to talk about.

The guards swiftly let them in once they arrived at the room. The two passed the antechamber and entered the room to find their sister simply sitting by herself drinking a cup of tea as if nothing was wrong with the world—as if she hadn't attempted to kill their sister a week ago.

Once she saw them, Masami dropped everything—the cup and every facade she had worn—as her eyes turned gentle like he had always remembered them being. Her hands free, she stood and lovingly reached out to them but neither took to her invite. They weren't in the mood.

The smile that had appeared out of nowhere dulled but didn't completely disappear. Taking her arms closer to her body, Masami nodded and tilted her head. "Thank you for coming."

"A deal was made," Sousei explained, not wanting for this to be mistaken as anything but political. "We were taught that a Reizei always keeps their word."

"As it should be," she complied peacefully. "You would do father proud."

"Which is the least that could be said about you," Suisei interrupted but swiftly got reprimanded by Sousei.

Masami's smile completely disappeared and she pursed her lips. "I did what I had to to protect you."

This time, he had to keep Suisei from speaking by placing a hand on her arm and physically pulling her back. "Protect us from what?"

"Her lies." Masami shook her head at seeing their puzzled expressions and motioned them to the vacant seats before the small table where she had been having tea. "This...won't be easy for me to tell you, much less for you to hear. I know you won't believe me but I have more than enough prove. And I'm sorry that I am the one who has to tell you this."

Hearing this, the stern yet genuine tone of her voice, alarmed Sousei and made his stomach turn. "What are you talking about?"

Masami sighed defeated but took a sit before lifting her head to address them both. "The truth...of who you've believed to be Kohaku for all these years."

* * *

"You sure you're okay to walk?"

Ceara scrunched her nose at Seijin's overprotectiveness and dismissed it with her a wave of her hand as she walked over to the windowsill of the sickroom. The boy sighed and came over to her, telling her of the progress Parisa saw in her.

"I'm okay, mother," Ceara replied, grinning at the distasteful frown the blonde gave her. "I can walk just fine, Jin. It's just my head that's not screwed on right, right now."

"You still…" he motioned his head to the side unable to finish his sentence.

"See things?" she finished for him. When he nodded, she reciprocated the gesture. "At times. They're less frequent, they still don't let me sleep well, but they are...manageable."

What she neglected to mention was what was making them so manageable: a kind smile and warm amethyst gaze that she kept seeing. A young man—surely, a figment of her mind—that talked to her when she sunk to her worst lows. A kind man that quieted the ghosts that plagued her and all the same urged her to hurry because there was no time to waste.

" _Act before they do,"_ he'd said the last time her head had conjured his image. _"Don't let them dictate the course of this. Beat them to it and corner them down before they do this again to you, or worse, to those you care about."_

That warning struck her deep, especially when she had suffered years of previous abuse so others wouldn't be hurt by the truth she fought to kept hidden. But everything teetered on a thin lifeline—a line that felt taut, just ready to snap.

Seijin's mindless talk about how in a few weeks the Summit meeting would take place in an island between Reim and Magnostadt—neutral grounds—got her mind to wander. There, all would be equal with no metal or household vessels or magicians to speak of, but Ceara doubted either of the three global powers would go without a shield to fall back on. She knew for a fact that Kouen wouldn't dare arrive barehanded; how he would actually avoid that was beyond her. And although she had only seen the king for a few minutes, Ceara had the feeling that neither would Sindria's king, Sinbad. Those two—they appeared much too similar to not know one when knowing the other.

Ceara wanted to attend. Despite the obvious power struggle that would ensue from having Sindria and Kou gathering in supposed 'neutral grounds,' she yearned to know, too, what the young magi, Aladdin, had promised to tell them both. But as things stood, she wasn't too sure whether she would be allowed.

The Imperial family already suspected her, no matter how amicable they still appeared to be. She wasn't enough of an idiot to not notice that. Ceara was still being held by an invisible string—one last one after the rest had been severed. But it was taut and plucking it further was something she didn't wish to do.

 _This whole mess is still salvageable. Somehow...it has to be._

" _It's mendable."_ Ceara touched the red-feather pen that hung low from behind her ear at hearing Beleth's calm voice, his presence soothing. _"We'll find a way."_

" _He's right."_ Her fingers brushed against the bracelet encrusted with bone that so warmly sat against her wrist. It almost felt like Marbas held her hand tenderly. _"So rest. You're still not in your best shape."_

Rest. She wished she could. But a lot of things were flooding her mind at the moment—the hallucinations, the summit meeting, the twins, and Murmur. Falling from her bracelet, her hand clutched at the small velvet pouch that hung at her hips. Feeling through the fabric, she could discern the pieces of her hairpin. Broken in pieces, the eight-pointed star broken in half and visible.

 _Murmur…_

" _It will be all right, lamb,"_ Beleth assured her. _"He is there. However, a new metal vessel must be found for him."_

Marbas hummed, her tone making Ceara imaging a smile on the beast girl. _"And then he'll be back in a jiffy! Just find something as valuable for him to transfer to."_

Valuable. There wasn't anything as valuable to her as Cael's gift, the one piece she had left of his memory.

 _No. Not the only thing._

"His letters."

"Pardon?" Seijin called but didn't have time to ask again when Ceara sprinted out of the sickroom to her old chambers.

Her journal. It wasn't in the study. It had been the one thing she hadn't brought with her because it was hers to keep. Her own private thoughts and regrets. Ceara had hidden it in her room but had completely forgotten about it. But her anxiety only seemed to escalate as the guards before her own room did not allow her entry. They apologized profusely but denied her entrance all the same, and she was becoming more paranoid as she pleaded for them to let her in for just a few minutes.

"What is the meaning of this?" For once in a long while, Ceara was glad to hear Kouen's baritone voice behind her. Spinning on her heels, she ignored Koumei's presence and simply focused on him.

"I need to check on my journal," she told him. "Tell them to let me in."

"Journal?" Koumei asked with a furrowed brow. "I'm afraid not. That room is still being investigated, as is Reizei Masami's, for anything—"

"It has my brother's letters!" she cried out not caring that the guards or Seijin overheard her. "Please, let me in."

Kouen sighed in frustration but with a single nod of his head, the soldiers backed away. Thanking him profusely, she rushed into the room and went directly to a small board on the floor beside the foot of her bed. Dislodging the floor board from its place, Ceara's breath caught when she found nothing underneath it.

"Young miss?"

Ceara ignored Seijin's query as she shot up, her head turning every which way in an attempt to find her journal. Everything still laid trashed. Since they were still investigating it, she supposed, they hadn't moved a single thing from place. She paced the room, her eyes scanning every which way, searching for the leather bound book.

"Here."

Spinning around, she trotted over to Kouen who had his back turned to her. Ceara walked quickly around him expecting to find the journal in his hands but instead only saw a pile of mostly ashes in a metal box, a ripped up journal haphazardly lying next to it. Kneeling before it, Ceara frantically skimmed through what was left of the book. Some pages were ripped, other torn, but there were no loose papers. No matter how much she shook it to let any out, the journal had nothing. Her hands darted out to the bin and dug through it, her hands tainting black as she sifted through the ashes, until she found pieces of legible paper.

Charred fragments of letters. Unable to believe it, she clutched the largest piece she'd found—a piece of parchment with '- _eday. Prom-'—_ and gritted her teeth.

"...she burned them."

"You don't know that."

Rage filling her, she faced Kouen to protest the absurd excuse. "Who else would have?!" she shouted at him. "I never told anybody about his letters. These were mine! And now…" She felt her throat constrict as she fought desperately against her tears. "They're—"

"Out of the way!"

Shocked and startled by the commanding voice that came from outside, Ceara saw the door of her room burst open as Sousei and Suisei stepped into the room. Her previous anger vanishing into thin air, worry came to her expression at seeing them so upset, both of their eyes red and puffy. What she failed to see until it was too late was the fact that they had ignored everybody else in the room and simply made a clear way to stand before her. The shock from that realization came just as both of them called out one question to her at the same time. "Who are you?"

Her blood stopped cold in her veins. "...what?"

Suisei was the one to shoot out first. Her emotions being much more volatile, she took a step forth and cried out, anger boiling underneath her words. "Are you really Haku-nee?"

Ceara's grip on the small piece of paper tightened, her heart beating loudly against her ears, almost deafening her. "Where did you—"

"Masami," Sousei replied, his eyes narrowed, suspicious. "She told us what she did and why she did it. And she told us about who you are and who you aren't." For a brief second, his anger set aside, he faced her with a gentler gaze. "But it's not true, right? You _are_ Kohaku...aren't you?"

Her hand shook as both of them stared her down, their dark eyes angered, confused, and pleading. They wanted an answer; they wanted the truth. But when she opened her mouth, nothing came out; her voice, just like everything else, didn't seem to be working. Even as Beleth and Marbas' familiar warmth cradled her, she still felt frozen, unable to speak or even move.

" _It will be all right, my king."_

" _Be brave, Ceara."_

 _But...I'm scared._

Terrified that it would be just like when Masami found out.

Out of nowhere, a hand reached out and touched the small of her back. Blinking out of her stupor, she felt the warmth from Kouen's hand encouraging her. The fear didn't disappear, she wasn't able to move, but at least her voice worked again.

"I...—my name is...Ceara of Eriu." Her eyes stared at both of them as every emotion left them and was replaced by utter disbelief. "I'm—I was your sister's, Kohaku's, vassal. Her friend." Gripping the piece of paper tighter, her knuckles turning white as she held her own hands together, and leaning slightly back against the hand that held her in place, Ceara voiced the answer they deserved to hear. "I'm not Kohaku. I'm not...your sister."

"Don't lie!" Suisei called out, tears finally falling and tearing at Ceara's heart. "One of you—one of you is lying!" The outburst didn't make sense to Ceara, but Suisei didn't seem to be making sense to any of them. Sousei brought her closer to him to console her and quiet her tears.

Holding his own back, Sousei had to take a few breaths before lifting his head to ask, "A djinn. Masami—she said that you would have another: a third djinn that Kohaku shouldn't have."

Touching the velvet pouch at her hip with shaky hands, she opened it and drew out one of the larger pieces, a part of the carnation, and held it with the eight-pointed star visible to them. Sousei didn't seem shocked but did grab tightly onto Suisei before whispering something in her ear. Ceara didn't understand despite being able to clearly hear his words; it was their language. But whatever Sousei had told her only made her cry harder as she held onto his back.

Sousei lifted his head from the side of Suisei's to face her, "...since when?"

Despite the sting that bothered her eyes, Ceara didn't look away from him. Even as she struggled to breath through her small whimpers, she answered quietly. They deserved to know. "The fire at the house. She—Kohaku died protecting me." It wasn't until his eyes widened in shock that she hung her head in shame and pain, "I didn't have the heart...to tell you. Any of you. I'm sorry."

"...s-sorry?" Suisei raised her head from Sousei's shoulder and cried out, "You're sorry? After lying to us for all this time!"

Panic raised her voice as she took a few steps towards them. "I didn't mean for it to happen! For any of this! I wanted to tell you; I did!" She stopped just in front of them as they held onto each other. "But everything just happened so fast. Before I knew it...things just _were_."

"And you lied. To all of us." Sousei gritted his teeth as tears fell down his cheeks. "Father and mother died knowing nothing."

"I'm sorry," she repeated. "But even so, even despite the lies, I always loved you. You became my family. I have loved you and I always will. Nothing will change that."

"You're n-not our sister," Suisei sobbed, a few hiccups rushing out as she cried on, and the statement hit Ceara hard. Anger took control of her then as she snapped at the princes that stood behind Ceara. "And you? You knew and did nothing."

Kouen was the one to reply to the accusations. "We only discovered this recently during Magnostadt, but as we told Masami, she is an asset. Nothing will be done until after we have utilized her powers. That entails that her identity must be kept hidden which is why we will give you the same order given to the witnesses at Magnostadt: this will not go beyond us."

The looks in their eyes told Ceara the deep-seated anger towards Kouen at forcing them to do such thing. They didn't want her to go be known by Kohaku's name anymore. What was worse, she knew they wouldn't want to be anywhere near her, much less stand beside her in the battlefield. But they couldn't say that.

"Fine, but in exchange release Masami." Sousei's request came out of nowhere as he stepped out from Suisei, the two standing side by side.

"That's not acceptable," Koumei replied to him. "She still committed a crime."

"And she didn't?" Suisei called out, pointing at Ceara. "If Masami is guilty, then so is this... _Ceara._ She killed Haku-nee. She should share the same fate."

At hearing that, Ceara couldn't keep herself from whimpering but did quickly quiet herself. She didn't have a right to cry, not when they were the ones justified their anger.

"And like I said previously, that judgement will be withheld until after she's deemed unnecessary to our cause." Kouen stood his ground against the two. "I understand your ire and grief, but I will not throw away a weapon that could be useful for my conquest of the west."

The three fell suddenly into a deadlock. They wanted for her to expose to truth and for the overdue execution. Kouen wanted to keep the resource that could serve him.

"Then let us have this instead." Sousei addressed Kouen, the young boy standing before his commanding general in utter defiance and yet still composed despite the streak that his tears had left behind as he wiped them. "Release Masami and we won't call for the truth to be known or reveal it ourselves. We will even lay the notion of an execution to rest."

"What?" It amazed Ceara that Suisei was just as shocked about the proposition. _What's the meaning of this?_

"Sou—"

A swift hand raised her way, quieting her protests. Instead, he gazed up at both Imperial princes before asking, "Will that suffice to have her released to us?" Koumei turned to Kouen who, after a minute to mull over the options, accepted.

"But Sousei!"

"No, Suisei. Freeing Masami is our priority. But I do agree with you; she should be punished." A crooked smile came to his lips—grief and bitterness etched on his expression—as he unsheathed his sword. He took a glance at the sheen of the blade before going around Kouen to toss his household vessel at Ceara's feet. Her breath hitched at hearing the metal clanking against the wooden floors until it stopped. Once it did she met his eyes that didn't leave hers, a deep cobalt staring right into her. "We hereby forfeit our right for imperial punishment against the woman who murdered our sister. And I also forfeit my position as captain of the Southern Subjugation Army so long as she remains its general." Sousei's gaze shifted slightly to Kouen, "I hope you find that acceptable."

Ceara couldn't believe the words Kouen said then, "I do."

"I don't." Suisei's outburst echoed through the room as she turned to her brother. "She shouldn't be let go. Not after all the lies."

"Killing her won't stop our pain, Sui," he whispered to her with a hand gently laid against her cheek. "It'll only stop hers. Our mercy, on the other hand, she doesn't deserve. Which is why—"

"...it's the worse punishment…" Suisei whispered under her breath that despite being only an exhale, Ceara heard every word of. Resolved, she reached behind her neck and unclasped the zircon-silver necklace, tossing it at Ceara's feet—her heart jumping as metal hit metal—and absolving herself of her position as captain as well.

With that done, Sousei addressed both princes, "We will keep our word. Now keep yours."

Kouen nodded and looked over his shoulder at Koumei. "Release Reizei Masami of her imprisonment and charges. There will be no persecution against her."

"Yes, my brother and king." Koumei stepped forward and told the two of them to follow him. Without another word, only a sidelong glance from Sousei, the twins left and with them Ceara felt something being ripped out of her.

The doors hadn't even closed behind them when she felt her legs weak. Stumbling down, she grasped onto the sword and necklace—her gifts that they had turned into their worst weapon against her.

Her mind felt broken again. This time, though, it was out of a mixture of grief and confusion. All these years, Ceara had expected nothing short of pure hatred. She had expected them to be like Masami and hate her for what she had done. And they had...until they didn't.

Sousei had been right. Ceara had always expected their hatred, their insults, and for them to curse her to the high hells. Not this sparing.

 _Not something I don't deserve from them._

And this—she wrapped one arm around the blade while holding the necklace in another hand, tucking both closer to her chest—this desertion she hadn't ever imagined. The gifts they had earned from her djinn because of their loyalty and trust—for Sou and Sui to forfeit them...

 _It's gone. There's nothing left of me with them._

Neither in their minds not their hearts. They made that clear.

"Ceara."

The sound of her own name revolted her and she recoiled from the hand that touched her shoulder.

 _Get out._

"...get out…"

"What?"

"Get out!" she shouted, holding the blade so close to her that she felt the tip dig into her side. It didn't pierce through but still hurt, like everything else did. Ignoring the tears that fell down her face, from both bitterness and sadness, she stepped back away from the two that remained in the room and glared at Kouen as he remained the immovable wall that he was. She hissed the words under her breath and stood back until she hit the post of the canopy bed. The prince didn't answer her nor adhere to her demand, he only stood there. And it was getting tiresome.

"I said **get out!** " she shouted, her voice reverberating. Strangely, she felt the air around her ripple and her eardrums ache as her voice augmented in volume. Must've been Beleth's power accidentally activating.

" _My king, it wasn—"_

"Fine," Kouen finally replied, turning away from her to head to the exit. "Seijin." The boy jolted at the deep voice that commanded him now but spared a glance at Ceara as she pressed against the bedpost. He opened his mouth but was shut when Kouen repeated his name, this time in a much harsher, sterner tone. Obeying, he lowered his head briefly at her before trotting after him.

Finally alone, Ceara couldn't help but fall apart in an instant. The last thread that had been so tautly strung had finally snapped and with it so did her family. All this time, she had feared this would happen, but no amount of fear or worry could have ever prepared her for this.

"I'm sorry."

"...fuck off," she snarled, recognizing well by then the lilt of that man's voice.

He didn't however. Instead, she heard his steps grow closer and stand beside her before falling as he sat beside her. A warm hand came and wrapped itself around her shoulders, bringing her head down against a warm body. "You're in pain and I understand that you wish to be left alone. But right now, you mustn't be."

The words, despite their vagueness, made her doubt why he was even there—why she was even hallucinating after a day of not seeing anything—but his warmth and tight hold soothed her. Just the proximity and care of another person was enough to give her some leeway to let go.

And she did, crying at the top of her lungs until her voice became hoarse. All the while, he sat beside her simply being there. By the time she could no longer weep from how her throat hurt, she undid the tight hold she had on the household vessels left to her. Reaching out with her hands, she brushed her fingers across the steel blade and bright blue zircon.

"I tried to warn you, to urge you so you would understand," he began as he retrieved his arm from around her, "things like this happen when you don't take action. You refused to take that first step—you're reactive—and it cost you."

No. She had this coming since long ago, even she could admit that, but another part of her couldn't help but agree with him. Masami took every initiative to make this a complete fall for her: incapacitate her and get to the twins first. Kouen had been right, prolonging things out of fear was the worst thing she could have done.

"Learn from this, Speirr," the man told her, tilting his head to give her a sidelong glance.

"I had this coming, though." Ceara felt stupid answering a hallucination. "And if they believe this is best, then I won't deny it from them. No matter how much it hurts me."

"You shouldn't have to suffer simply because you love too much," he retorted.

There was no answer for her to give to that. Not one that she wouldn't regret later, anyway. As much pain as she was in, Ceara couldn't fathom how part of her logical mind told her to just be quiet. And she did and for a few minutes everything, including him, was silent.

"I see you still doubt what I say despite what's happened," the blond man responded with a heavy sigh. As he stands up, his golden plait flows back and forward behind him, and again when he turns about to bend before her. "But that's all right. I won't let you suffer alone again, Ceara, but you have must learn sooner or later. Preferably sooner."

"Just leave me be."

"If that's what you want, then I will. But if you ever want my help, rest assured, call me and I will answer."

"Call you?"

"Yes," he said and reached his hand, managing to brush the tip of his forefinger against her temple. A strange electricity surged through her whole body, like a small shock that came and left, before a single name popped into her head. "Just call my name and I will come help you anyway I can. All right?"

Ceara felt idiotic for answering but felt compelled to as the man's silhouette began to lose color and become transparent. "I will, Rakah."

Rakah grinned, a glint coming to his amethyst eyes a second before he became fully transparent and the light refracted, breaking his form and vanishing. Staring at empty space with wide-eyes, Ceara couldn't fathom what she had just seen. She wanted to think herself crazy, that the poison had damaged her brain permanently somehow, but every time Rakah appeared, it seemed less likely.

And yet he'd been there, more than once.

 _Just forget it. I won't ever call whoever or whatever that man is._ And Ceara swore she wouldn't. Forgetting about everything, she stood and laid in the bed of what used to be her room, not caring for the sheets dirtied in dried blood—her blood—and cried, holding onto the household vessels that no longer held power and thinking of the brother and sister that left her.

* * *

Kouen absolutely abhorred meddlesome issues that interfered with his plans. In the last week, it had been the poisoning with Ceara. That morning, it was the Reizei twins' recusal as captains. Now, as the evening came to settle over Balbadd, it was Reizei Sousei, head of his household, that brought him a new problem; the youngest son of the late General Koujiro prostrated himself before Kouen, only standing when told to do so.

The boy seemed to still be downtrodden about what had occurred but a few hours ago, the news that had turned both his sister's and his own life upside-down. That same boy, however, appeared as composed as could be. All except for the redness of his eyes that belied his actual emotional state.

"I apologize for our sudden recusal from the army, especially with the Summit meeting so rapidly approaching."

He dismissed the issue with a wave of his hand. "I allowed you to do as you did frankly because without those household vessels you are like any common soldier." There were always citizens of Kou willing to join his army and two lost kids wouldn't put a dent on that number. The morale of those that fought with them, though, would be another issue itself. One he would deal with later. "But I digress. You aren't here just to apologize, I'm assuming."

"Yes." Sousei took a step closer to Kouen as he sat at the head of the council table after the last war meeting of the night. "His highness, Prince Koumei, assured us that Masami would be released by the morrow. But what I came to request if for your permission to return to Rakushou."

"Why?"

"Your highness, regardless of what's occurred, neither Suisei nor I wish to forfeit completely from your army or purpose," he explained. "We wish to fight to unite the world as you have said. However, after what you hid from us, we cannot so readily do so. Are you still adamant on not punishing Ceara of Eriu?"

"As I made clear to you before, she is a valuable resource as a multiple dungeon capturer." Kouen sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, not knowing how many times he would have to repeat himself for them to understand. "And as we agreed upon, you've forfeited the right for Imperial interference where she is concerned."

"I am aware," Sousei replied with a crooked smile, lowering his head with a small scoff. "In all honesty, Prince Kouen, I don't think I would have been able to stand her execution even if it had been the right thing to do to get Kohaku some justice. But despite there being a part of myself that doesn't want to see her harmed, I can't readily forgive nor forget the truth of the fact that she lied."

Something about Sousei's words piqued Kouen's interest and he decided to pursue this. "Is that what you're upset about?"

The youngest twin stiffened for a second before coming back to his normal stance. "Yes. This whole situation, I feel, could have gone several different ways had she only decided to speak to us about the truth."

"Killing a friend and taking her place isn't exactly the easiest topic to open with."

"I agree." Sousei raised his head and shook it, "But still…"

 _He knows more than he lets on._

But he shelved that idea for later. At the moment, it mattered more to settle this as quickly and cleanly as possible to put his attention were it mattered most. "If that's all you request, then go ahead. Fleets are constantly leaving from Balbadd to several of Kou's ports, including Shika—I'm sure some are leaving tomorrow morning. From there, it'll be a few days to Rakushou. Just ascertain yourself that neither of your sisters will speak of what you know."

"I will, you have my word on that," Sousei assured him. "Then we will depart on tomorrow's earliest fleet home. We shall return to the fronts with your army once we have settled our issues. I thank you as head of the Reizei Household for this time."

"Don't," Kouen responded. "I am doing this out of courtesy; you yielded the Eastern Isles without pushing the agenda of your family first as your father attempted to before you. You are capable of seeing the larger picture which we're fighting for and I respect that."

The young head of household bowed and thanked him one last time before excusing himself. Kouen had a moment for himself then; a respite that was made quite short as Ri Seishuu entered and bowed before addressing his reason for breaking his peace.

"The silversmith's assistant came to deliver what you ordered, young master." Seishuu withdrew a small hexagonal box from the folds of his clothes before placing it before Kouen. The box had appeared dwarfed in his Household Member's gigantic hands, but in his, as he opened it to examine the piece that laid inside, it was just the right size.

Closing the box again, Kouen stood up, thanking and dismissing Ri Seishuu, before heading towards the west part of the palace. Surely, even after the hours that had passed, Ceara would not have moved an inch from that room. Despite having wanted to stay and assure himself that she would be fine, her volatile emotions drove him against that. After such heavy-handed blows, one after the other, the girl was more than devastated. And with how vehement she was about being left alone, Kouen thought it best to comply with her for once. But as things stood, he could only let her dwell in her grief for so long. She needed to return to her sickroom as well, seeing as she had not completely recovered.

The guards stepped aside the instant they saw him, informing him that she had indeed never left the room. Not bothering to knock, he came in to a slightly differing scene from when he left her. Instead of the floor, she sat on the bed, giving him her back as she leaned against one of the bedposts on the foot of the bed. From where he stood, Kouen could see her hands resting upon the blade, the blue zircon necklace beside her, as she rested her head and stared at the ceiling.

"If you're here to patronize me, don't bother," she whispered, not bothering to turn around. "Whatever you might tell me, I've thought over about ten times."

"Then I won't." Taking his full strides to reach her, he sat across from her, leaning against the headboard. "How are you—"

"Feeling?" she finished, refusing to look him in the eye still. "Curiously enough, I don't feel anything anymore. At first, I was just devastated, grief-stricken, and then after I kept repeating in my head what went wrong, what I could've done to make it better, I realized that there was nothing I could have possibly done that would have changed anything. That spiraled me down a never-ending hole of...well, disgust and despair, frankly."

"You're still there by the sound of it," Kouen pointed out.

"Astute observation," she drawled sarcastically before lowering her head to finally face him. Kouen could see the dry streaks of tears and the redness of her eyes as she glared at him. "Now that that's out of the way, how about leaving me to my hopelessness?"

"You need to return to the infirmary," he simply replied. "The magician healer needs to see you. You haven't recovered completely yet."

"I don't feel like going back." Her gaze fell against the steel blade that she let her hand slide against, the smoothness gleaming in the dim moonlight that spilled in through the window. "I'd much rather stay here and wallow."

"And die." Having no denial from her, Kouen assumed he had guessed the right answer. Predictable, especially with how her emotional state was at the moment. "Don't waste yourself like that. It won't help anybody."

"Right." Ceara scoffed and shook her head, "You still need me for conquering the west, right?" Her cynicism suddenly vanished from her expression as she frowned. "Tell me, once that ends, what will you do with me?"

"More than likely," he said, wanting to be truthful, "you will be imprisoned."

"No execution?"

"No."

"Shame," she breathed against her sigh. "It'd actually give me something to look forward to."

Acrimonious, nihilistic, and suicidal: like there wasn't enough to deal with already. Kouen knew from before that dealing with her was hard when she fell to her lows. Now it would be much more difficult to dig her out of it. But he would try.

"The twins and Masami are returning to Shika on a fleet first thing tomorrow morning." Telling these news bought him her attention as she lifted her face to meet him. "You wish to see them off?"

There was a pause before grief stole into her gaze. "For what? They'll just curse at me and hate me all the same. Besides, I don't want to see Masami. She'd only gloat and that's the last thing I want to see."

"Then merely watch from afar," Kouen suggested. "See them off that way and ensure at least with your own eyes that they'll be heading there safely."

"Are you inviting me to go?"

"If that is what you want, I'll have Ri Seishuu and Kin Gaku escort you as per protocol."

Her brow furrowed then as she brought her knees closer to her body along with the sword and necklace. "Why?"

"You're grief-stricken in a way I've never seen you before, excluding Kohaku's departure."

He sighed and leaned forward. The bed was small enough, and him overtly larger, that it was easy to reach her. He took the zircon necklace first, undoing the clasp and wrapping it around her neck, before clasping it closed after a bit of a struggle. The zircon fell just above her chest, the blue of the gem contrasting against her eyes. Standing up, he strode forward and helped her to stand, careful to maneuver the sword she held tightly onto. Undoing the belt strap from his own sword, he laid Astaroth's metal vessel upon the bed as he adjusted the leather belt to her size. Once done, he wrapped it around her hips without much protest from her. If anything, Kouen could tell she was just puzzled at what he was doing. She wasn't the only one. He took the hilt of the sword from her hands and took it before carefully putting it in place without a sheath.

"But Sousei and Suisei are alive still, Ceara. Which means you still have a duty to protect them."

"What's the point," she protested, reaching to caress the necklace that fell upon her chest and the sword that laid snugly at her right. "They don't want to have anything to do with me."

"And I have seen you be more stubborn than a mule where their safety is concerned, whether they wanted it or not. Does it really matter now that they don't want you or your protection? Does that fact make you care for them any less?"

The question didn't seem to deserve any thought. "Never."

"Then I fail to see what this whole problem is about." Kouen took Astaroth's vessel in one hand while digging with the other underneath the folds of his clothes. "You or what you feel so strongly about won't change no matter what others do—even them. I understand you're grieving after what's happened but being here won't help them or you with whatever may happen. Fighting for us will ensure their safety, and isn't that what matters most to you?"

"Yes."

"Then fight with all the power you've obtained to protect them," he urged her before taking the box out and showing it to her. Her eyes widened a bit at seeing the odd box he placed in her unexpectant hands. Confused, she glanced up at him a couple of times before he became irritated. Taking his hands, he grabbed the box from underneath, covering the one hand she was using to hold it was well, while the other opened the box.

In it was a finely made hair comb. It was silver, she could tell, and although small the flower she saw decorating the center of it was a silver carnation with light touches of reds and pinks. Swirls came out from underneath the silver flower, encrusted with tiny pearls colored a slight metallic green and blue.

"Keep it," Kouen told her, taking it out and placing it in the palm of her hand. "Use it for Murmur and regain that power you obtained for yourself. That power is yours and no one can take it away from you."

There was a brief pause as she stared at the small piece. Aloof as could be, she closed the box and whispered, "I will. Thank you, Kouen." Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath before continuing, "For this and for coming for me."

"Are you going to go back to your sickroom?" he asked and she nodded. As if reminded of something, Kouen saw her brow furrow as she took a minute. "Is everything all right?"

"I think so." She sighed and frown before facing him. "It's just that I'm still having hallucinations and it's worrying me."

"The magician that's taking care of your treatment—"

"Parisa."

"—she said that the poison's effects could last for at least two weeks," he assured her. "For you to have a few hallucinations shouldn't be that alarming."

"But I'm seeing things that don't make sense." Her hand reached to her head and brushed through her hair as she tried to calm herself for a second. "Dead people, sure I get that, but strange men that I don't know or think I kn—"

"Strange men?" he repeated.

"Well, one in particular actually." The correction didn't help the small irk that came to be in him as she continued her description. "It's weird because...he seems too real to be a hallucination."

"It probably is."

"You think so too?"

"If you don't think about it for a while, then it should go away, Ceara." Reaching behind her, he took her by the small of her back and urged her forward so that she could get to the sickroom. "Your mind isn't in the best condition, neither are your emotions—that could be affecting your health overall. Just go rest and let Parisa work on you."

"Y-Yeah," she stammered a bit unsure but taking his word for what it was worth. "I'll do that."

Kouen took her all the way to the sickroom and left her in the hands of the healers and Parisa before leaving. Despite leaving, though, he still couldn't forget what she had said about her hallucinations.

One too real to be fake; a strange man in particular. If he didn't know better, Kouen would say that she actually had contact with the bastard that was fooling around in his territory. If so, then he would personally hunt and strike him down. Nobody would infiltrate his base of operations without a care and not pay for it.

* * *

"Don't go far." Ceara glanced over her shoulder at Ri Seishuu and nodded, pulling at the cowl over her head to hide her face better.

She was grateful that Kouen had told her about the twins leaving but she would have appreciated some faith that she would return. Although she liked both of the household members, the fact that they were assimilated actually made it hard for her to walk around incognito. Already at the ports, it amazed Ceara that Balbadd was in such a rush so early in the morning. People, from sailors and merchants to locals, meandered the streets, overflowing them to the brim. From what the two household members had told her, Sou and Sui would leave with a fleet headed to Shika and from there they had been instructed to return to the Kou Empire's capital.

It took a couple of minutes but she finally found the ship that was almost finished loading by the looks of it. Ships were constantly coming and going, and as she tried getting a better look of the entourage sent with her family, Ceara couldn't quite see them as more people flooded through the port. Stepping out into the crowd, she overheard Seishuu's and Gaku's calls but ignored them all the same. She wouldn't go far anyway, just close enough to see them leave. Shoving through the people that walked against her, she pushed up against a building's wall near an alleyway, climbing over stacked crates to get an overhead view.

Standing up there got her a good bird-eye's view and she watched Masami and the twins from afar. All of them looked tired, devastated, grieving. Much like she had been. Yet it pained her that they would part on such horrible terms, with her unable to explain herself or refute any of Masami's bogus accusations. Sousei and Suisei had denied her that chance—they wanted to know nothing of her—and no matter how much that broke her heart she would oblige with their wishes. It was the least she could do.

"Sad to see them go."

Startled to hear him there, Ceara looked over her shoulder to see Rakah standing a few crates down but tall enough still to look over and see the same scene she did. Cloaked in a heavy dark coat, most of his figure was hidden but she would recognize that lilting tone anywhere. But as she had assured herself by telling Kouen about him, Rakah wasn't real. Just another hallucination.

"You're not real."

Rakah chuckled, throwing his head slightly back before looking up at her. "Still on that bandwagon, huh. When are you gonna face the truth? I'm as real as you are, Speirr. And like you, I understand how unfair this is."

 _Unfair?_

"I've seen the things you've done, what you've accomplished. You've saved so many and given so many hope, and you do all those things simply because, well, good needs doing, right?"

"You don't know why I do the things I do."

He chuckled loudly at that, holding onto his side. "Come on, it's plain as day. Sure, you regret what you've done—killing off the girl—but wouldn't taking care of that family of hers be penance enough? And you did! For thirteen years, you took care of them as she should have and that should have been more than enough to calm that guilt of yours. So why do the orphan houses or even those soldier memoirs? They don't repent for anything."

"They're for others."

"Charity," Rakah scoffed and climbed another crate to come closer to her. "Admit it, Speirr, you do good out of your own volition, it's comes naturally for you. But that makes you predictable, and it's because of that—" Stopping briefly, he lifted his arm to point out towards the docked ship that was boarding the few passengers it would take, including her family. Ceara watched from afar as Masami boarded the ship with one twin in either arm before disappearing to the inside. "—that she's strolling out of here, free of punishment for what she's done, with them in tow."

"It's their choice," Ceara refuted but had a hard time believing her own words as her hands grabbed onto the edge of the crate before her.

"And yours?" he asked, curious. "Are you going to stand here and let her take them away like that, after all she's done to you? If you're fine with them hating you, then okay, you win. But you aren't, are you?"

 _No, but it's not up to me what they feel or think._

Unable to voice that thought, however, left Rakah another opening to speak. "I warned you countless times before to act before she did. Ofttimes the people who do the worst end up with all the good in the world. My case in point, you did everything right and yet she's the one walking out of here with the two people that have mattered most in your life."

His words riled Ceara to a point where she couldn't keep quiet anymore and before she knew it she snapped at him, turning about to meet his amethyst eyes with her stark blue ones. "Yes, it's extremely infuriating that after all she's done to me, threatening to hurt them and using me to get what's she's wanted, they leave with her. It's fucking frustrating that I can't go up there right now, and tell them the truth; convince them of what is right. And what annoys me the most—" Her voice lowered as she spoke through gritted teeth, trying at the same time to keep back her bitter tears, "—is that I keep thinking that I deserve this."

"And the worst part is that you don't see how wrong you are to think that and how right it is that you feel all that," Rakah told her, stepping closer until they stood in equal footing, making her lift her head to look at him. "You've been selfless long enough, Ceara."

" _Don't."_

 _Murmur?_ His voice was weak, forced almost, but she could hear it. She could even feel how much magoi it was taking from her for him to say a few words.

" _You promised—love. No matter what…"_

 _Promise?_

That's right, she promised him…

 _I promised to Sousei that no matter what they think of me, even if they hate me for all I'm worth, I would always love them._

"But hating her for everything won't solve anything," Ceara confessed, lifting her head and wiping at the angry tears that had surfaced. "Sousei and Suisei made their choice as did Masami, just like I made mine years ago. And I decided that, no matter what they do, I'll love them all the same."

"You're leaving things up to chance in other words," Rakah groaned, clearly irritated.

"No, leaving things that concern us to them isn't leaving them to chance. I leave them in the hands of people I trust." Taking a page from the months of training, Ceara took a deep breath to calm herself from the bout of rage that had sprouted out of her before addressing him again. "Masami won, and I'm not happy about that. I am actually angry beyond belief but I won't go after her. She hurt them by telling them the truth; in reality, though, I would have done no different. They will come to accept and form whatever ideas they will, and I can accept that of them. Masami won't be punished but now that she has everything she wanted, there's no reason for her to antagonize me or those I care about anymore. As for me…"

 _I'll hurt for a very, very long time. And it'll be sad...to be alone again._

"I will go back to how my life was before them—" _I have to learn to live alone again._ "—and I'll survive without them by my side. Just knowing that they will be safe, I think is enough for me for now. Besides," Ceara smiled, feeling her grief anew, as she watched the fleet leave the docks, before climbing down the craters to the ground. Turning back up to Rakah who still stood above her, she simply gave him a small smile. "You said it yourself, I do good because good needs doing. I don't know how long it'll be before Kouen and the rest decide to make this public, but until they do, I have much of my work cut out for me."

"Don't do this to yourself, Ceara," Rakah warned her. "You're underestimating the situation— undermining what horrid things people are capable of doing to themselves and others for no reason—and that error can cost you more than you think. People like Masami, they don't stop at just hurting you; you're a fool if you think that. If she has the chance, she'll destroy you."

"Then let her," Ceara replied. "Let her hit me as hard as she can. I'll do what I've always done and hit back harder. So long as it's me she's aiming for, then it's fine. I'll handle her better next time." Giving her his back, she waved. "Goodbye, Rakah."

Ceara didn't bother looking back, knowing he would be surely gone, and instead walked with the crowd to find her escorts. The task itself wasn't hard as the two were frantically looking over the crowd for her. Reaching out to wave, she made her way to them, the two giants reprimanding her for leaving their side.

"I wanted to see them leaving," she replied and side-stepped them to head back to the palace. "They're on their way home now."

 _Home._

To where Kohaku and Cael rested, to where their parents passed and rested as well, to where their lives were made. Home where she lost it all and found something else in return: them.

 _And I' won't be digging any more graves for those I love. I'll regain Murmur's power and have the three of them always with me. I'll use everything and anything I have to to protect them from whatever comes our way, no matter what I have to do or who I have to fight._

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _Almost a whole month! Damn, I took my sweet time cx I legit wrote this chapter in chunks, twitter can attest to that slow-ass progression but I've done it! A bit underwhelming, I must admit (especially in the reveal), but it worked out :) There were so many breaks because of everything that was happening but it needed to happen. Some old characters, some new; one won't have much to do with the plot, the other will, and I'm pretty sure you guys are smart enough to guess who._

 _Lots of emotions and stuff happening, for sure. A couple of chapters ago, back when Kohaku got released, I finished the first part of the plot I'd written. With these past couple or three, I went through a backstory and through the first piece of the second part, so we're in the midpoint! (if my math is correct). Some of you may question, "well, everything's out in the open, right? What more could you possibly do?" Well, you'd be surprised! There's much I could do, plan to do, and why this chapter ended the way it did._

 _Because of certain things pointed out by my readers and others who enjoy my writing, I was made aware of some good criticisms that I've had to fix about my plot. Moreso about the paragonness of the character I created. Well, as things turn out, the fact that she ended up as a paragon, although not completely planned since the beginning, will serve a purpose! Because, let's face it, when someone thinks they do good and right because that's who they are and what they do, it's much harder to throw them out of their stubborn-sit and convince them otherwise. Paragons are scary little shits!_

 _(Sorry if this whole spiel was a bit to into my mind and writing process -w- )_

 _Anyway, with that whole talk over with (honestly I just needed to let that off of my chest cx). It's time to give some thanks where thanks are due! :D First to the wonderful people that Followed and Favorited._

 _ **\- NeverStory**_

 _ **\- E. M. M. 030996**_

 _ **\- XxLostInTheMusicxX**_

 _ **\- Crimson Killer**_

 _ **\- Premium. Carbonation**_

 _ **\- Arithus**_

Now to reply to the reviews that I couldn't answer to :)

 **\- Esme** : Haha, thanks for that cx It's hard to get those reviews but so long as I know people read it, it's something for me. Sorry it took so long to update too. And wow, Holland! That's amazing :D

 **\- Guest** : Frankly, I have to thank you very much for the review and constructive criticism. I'm glad at least some thing's got you onto this story and I was a bit afraid that Kohaku/Ceara would rub off as that. I cannot say it was completely accidental either but I will do what I can (without damaging my original backbone of the plot) to fix this problem. Thank you, truly, for what you said, and I hope it didn't completely deter you from continuing to read this story.

That's all this time folks! Since I'm on a little break before summer session starts, I will be working more on these stories. The series of writing for Magi I want to write will be worked more on c: If you guys don't want to wait so long for updates, check up on my twitter ( xkeyoftheabyssx) for small ones on progress I make on each chapter :)

That aside, I wish to thank you all who read, favorite, follow, and review the story c: You truthfully will always make my day and are the ones that make this whole thing worthwhile :) Love you all! So I hope you enjoyed this chapter and stay tuned for the next update.


	13. Seedling of Chaos

_**Chapter Thirteen:**_

 _Seedling of Chaos_

* * *

There was a quiet impasse that crawled its way through the palace, leaving any who could remotely sense it on edge. Even after only a couple of days of the Reizei siblings leaving to sail back home to Shika, those few who had overheard bits of small chatter or gossip were quick to speculate as to why such close family had so suddenly fractured.

Some said that there were inner quarrels about who should lead the family, which put soldiers of the Southern Armies beside themselves with frustration. Some spoke about the general herself pleading for them to leave for their safety, putting many who believed that in a quiet panic as to what such powerful people could possibly be running from. The most prominent by far, though, was of Masami no longer supporting her sister because, as rumor had it after the news of the disbanded marriage between herself and Prince Kouen, it was said that the Prince had actually been in affairs with the second daughter, the general herself.

But Seijin believed none of those. Not only because they were the most ludicrous rumors he'd ever heard, but because he knew the truth.

The woman they all had known as General Reizei Kohaku was actually one named Ceara of Ériu. Not a noble or familiar; simply a girl who once served the actual second daughter of the Reizei family.

Even that, though, sounded ridiculous to his ears and he would have not believed such thing had he not himself heard her say those exact words.

His mind in turmoil, Seijin could not figure where he stood now. Prince Kouen had assured him that if he so wished, he could serve under the Imperial Family and withdraw from serving the Reizei family all together. It certainly was the sounder decision. He had been a mere tailor's servant back in Rakushou and if he didn't want to return to those days of menial labor and poor treatment, he was better off taking the prince's offer.

Yet he couldn't bring himself to just accept and part from the same woman that had defended and freed him from such life.

"I don't know what to do." Leaning back against his chair, Seijin brushed a hand through his golden hair before meeting a pair of silver eyes that met his mossy green ones with indifference.

By telling Parisa all that he knew, he was basically breaking every order that Prince Kouen had given them, but he still needed to talk about this with someone. That night had replayed so much in his head and every detail was so vivid that there was no way he could attempt or feign to forget something like that. Besides, he trusted the older magician; despite being a few years older than himself, the two had become trusted friends in the short time after he arrived to Balbadd. The girl was more mature than she let on, and absolutely abhorred gossip which is why he felt he could tell her at least the minimum of what caused him so much conflict.

Serve the imperial family or return to serve a woman that was not who she said she was?

"Quite the conundrum." Taking a leaf from the vines around her wrist, she popped it in her mouth to chew it, her eyes locked on his.

"I don't need the obvious, Risa," he said, restraining from raising his voice as steps from other servants hurried outside of the quarters. "I need answers."

"Well then if you wanted that, you're wasting your time talking to me," she deadpanned. Giving her a long stare, Seijin exhaled, exasperated about the situation as she was apathetic to it. She waved her hand dismissively and leaned forward to keep the conversation between them as maids rushed in and out. "Jin, I can't choose for you. This is your problem and your life."

"But not the easiest choice of that short life," he added.

"What's so hard about it?" she asked.

"Are you—" Lowering his voice, he scooted in further and hissed back, " _Are you serious?_ What about this is easy?"

"Well," Parisa drawled, tapping her foot on the floor. "You said she saved you from being run over by a carriage, right?" Seijin nodded and gave her leeway to continue. "And you said that she didn't even announce her status when you guys were in trouble, either."

"Kinda hard to considering back then she couldn't speak."

Parisa waved the comment away like a pesky fly before patting his knee reassuringly. "But even after, when she offered to take you in, you accepted, right? Why?"

 _Why?_ "It was better than staying jobless and starve to death."

"See, I would believe that answer if you were not in such a predicament against your own conscious," she said plainly. Her finger came up to stab him right in the chest, slightly pushing him back against the chair. "Ask yourself: why did I really go with this woman?"

 _Why?_ Seijin couldn't think of one concrete answer to that. At least not immediately. Sure, he had been afraid of being left homeless to starve but unlike many other nobles or high-class customers he had served in his young life, she had been different _—felt_ different. And her first impression was only the tip of that feeling he'd gotten. Through the year he served under her, that woman had been one to confide in, one to trust, one who would work hard and do good. Perhaps, he thought, some of that was out of guilt from what he'd discovered but he found it hard to believe that it was all out of remorse or for simple penance.

She truly was happiest when helping others or her family. When she cared, she did so with everything she had; the same with whoever she deemed her enemy. Acting on extremes was what she did best and although he could tell it sometimes wasn't the best, she didn't back down once her mind was made.

 _Why did I accept to go with her?_

"It felt right." A chuckle escaped him as he remembered that day. "She saved me, had been so nice about it, and even defended me. She did all that and didn't even ask later for recompense."

After a while, the treatment she gave him made Seijin feel like he wasn't just a servant of her household but actually a part of it. She had made him a part of her family and he didn't even know how she'd manage that.

"She makes me feel like I have a place I belong. And the life I have now—the toiling alongside her, the training to better myself, and even just the fun I had—" Seijin sighed with a small chuckle as he finally seemed to understand something "—it makes me realize where I'm supposed to be now."

Parisa gave him a wide grin and, tilting her head, asked, "And where is that, Seijin?"

"By her side."

* * *

Quiet and yet not so at the same time. This felt truly disconcerting for some reason—almost like standing in the eye of a hurricane.

Ceara caught the sight of the bright outside that the day brought by the corner of her eye while pacing her room. Having been cleaned after everything had settled down a bit, she had promptly returned after being released from the infirmary just a few days after the twins' departed.

The poison had mostly left her system and, according to Parisa, whatever was left would swiftly follow as well. The young magician still checked-up on her daily as per requests from Kougyoku but Ceara found them unnecessary. She felt better, physically at least. Her mind still whirled with everything that had transpired in a short month and it bothered her sleep and appetite again.

But nothing bothered her more than being alone. Ceara thought that she would be able to deal with it. After all, during long expeditions or the like, she would often times go alone or with Masami which was practically the same. But she this was different; back then, she was assured that she could return to them and be welcomed. Now, she couldn't fathom what she could do, if anything, that would allow any sort of welcome from them anymore. Being alone now was smothering her slowly and it showed.

Even Kouen's kind words—a sentence she never thought she'd say—had done little to alleviate that pain. Having their household vessels close, along with her own metal vessels, did somewhat calm her but it also reminded her of what she no longer had. Of what another had so brazenly taken from her.

" _Offtimes the people who do the worst end up with all the good in the world."_

Rakah's words looped in her head, ringing a little truer every time, and it agitated her that she couldn't shake them away. Murmur's brief reminder the day the ship departed had kept her on the right track, reminding her of her promise, of why she did what she did.

 _I'll love them no matter what. And I'll do anything and fight anyone who gets in my way of protecting what I love._

She had been idle and submissive for too long. They had left, that was their choice, and as such she would respect it, but she wouldn't allow anything else to get in the way of what she wanted: to protect them.

His words, though, still rang on repeat: _"You're underestimating the situation— undermining what horrid things people are capable of doing to themselves and others for no reason—and that error can cost you more than you think."_

Part of her wanted to disprove that; after all, she had seen what good people carried in them and what a common cause could bring them to forgo. Another, however, couldn't help but agree because she had borne witness to the opposite as well. What her mind fought to agree upon was which would win over the other when everything was said and done.

Two knocks startled her out of her rattling mind and got her to immediately letting whomever had knocked in without thinking. Wide-eyed, Ceara stared at Seijin as he stood before her, hands poised behind himself. No one but those who needed to had met with her ever since a couple of days ago, much less those who had been in the room when the twins had burst in.

The young blond boy, however, stood firm and composed like he always did. But she worried the instant it sunk that he was there. Seijin held no obligation to her, much less now when he knew who she was.

She didn't want to drag what was surely to come any longer than it had to be. "Kouen told me about what he offered. You should take his proposal; it'll at least leave you in good standings."

Seijin's stern expression suddenly broke into a cheeky smile that baffled her. "No thanks."

The brashness of his speech took her by surprise as well. The boy that she had before her was much less polite than the one she'd raised for a year, and although somewhat reminiscent of the boy that had grown accustomed to her, he wasn't exactly like that either. This was different; _he_ seemed different.

"Why?"

"Frankly?" he said, stepping forth, "I don't want to serve him."

Such answer made her brow furrow in confusion. "But it'll secure your future. After what's happened, serving me—"

"Is what I want to do."

Ceara felt like someone had punched the air out of her at the same time that her heart felt a bit lighter with hope. _What?_

Seijin smiled. "I'm not joking, if that's what you're thinking. I'm very serious."

"But Seijin," she refuted, "you heard what I said, what I confessed to. You can't serve me."

"Says who?" he asked haughtily. "After all, it's not known publically, right? And Prince Kouen said you wouldn't be disposed of until after the subjugation of the west was complete, true?" She didn't see where he was going with all this, but she didn't have to wait long to hear his point. "Then there's absolutely nothing wrong with me continuing to serve you. All that everyone will know is that I serve under my master, Reizei Kohaku."

"But you know that's not true."

"Yes," he replied. "Which is what makes me all the more certain of my decision. I know the truth, and although I can't fully say I understand why you did the things you did, I honestly don't think they matter much."

 _How can it not?_ "Seijin, please." She grabbed him by his shoulders and met his eyes to get her point across. "Think about yourself. Think what's best for you."

"I am," he assured her with a smile. "And the last year I spent serving you has taught me more about the world, people, and myself that I ever thought possible. Most of all, I learned who I serve: a strong, kind, albeit stubborn master. And that latter part seems to have been contagious."

"Seijin."

"This past year I worked under a woman who has done extraordinary things for those in need. And now, I think I understand why. But I'm sure that not everything was out of guilt. I'm sure some was also because it's just who you are, Miss Ceara." Him calling her by that name made her flinch and her hold on him slacked. Stepping back from her hold, Seijin took a knee and saluted her with a bow before lifting his head, a warm smile on his face. "And I was proud, just as I am now, to call you my master." That cheeky grin from before returned, the boy that she had yet to meet surfacing again. "So, please, don't leave me here to look like a complete idiot."

The last comment got her to chuckle, her hands coming up to cover her mouth and the gesture making his grin widen. This boy, the Seijin that now let himself be known before her, was just as stubborn as her, she had to admit. And knowing them, neither would back down.

 _I guess I'll have to be the bigger woman then._

Bending down, Ceara grabbed him by his forearm to help him up so that they could stand face to face. Smiling at him, she let go before nodding. "If that's what you want, then I would be delighted to have you, Seijin." Reaching her hand out, it only took Seijin a few seconds before he took it in his to shake it. "My name is Ceara of Ériu and I'm more than pleased to meet you."

"Likewise, Miss of Ériu." Letting go, he chuckled while scratching his cheek sheepishly. "But I guess I can't very well call you that in public. If it's all right with you, may I continue addressing you as I have?"

"Do as you please, Jin," she said with a smile of her own. "It's what I'll do."

"Then I shall, master."

A glow from her pocket took both of them by surprise and made Ceara pulled out the velvet pouch from her side. The light came from the broken metal vessel inside but the intensity grew and concentrated into a small sphere of light before snuffing out. But despite being unable to see it, Ceara heard it: the rukh that flew to Seijin's side. And the small light that came to Seijin's left earring—a small leafed-vine of silver—amazed Ceara because she had only seen something similar happen twice in her lifetime.

She vividly remembered Sousei grinning the widest he had ever done before while holding his blade and Suisei ecstatically jumping from her joy grabbing at her silver-zircon necklace when the same thing had happened. Both had shone the same way. Both had received something from her djinn.

First from Beleth to Sousei. Then from Marbas to Suisei. And now…

"...Murmur."

"Master, what happened?" he asked nervously grabbing at his ear as if something had cut it off.

Ceara did her best to calm him before explaining something that, although she couldn't comprehend seeing the state of Murmur's metal vessel, she nonetheless was grateful for. "It's Murmur. Even as he is, he recognized you."

"Recognized me?"

Humming in agreement, Ceara couldn't help the smile that reached her lips. "As the first of his household."

* * *

"Seijin obtained a household vessel from Murmur?"

"Strange, I know." The fazed look quickly changed to a gentle smile at the mere thought of it. "But it's fine by me. I trust Murmur and know we both made the right choice." Turning to him, Kouen saw the sheepish smile that she gave him. "I guess he won't be joining your entourage in the end."

"Never thought he actually would." Kouen sat back against his chair, returning to reading the documents that still needed to be read before his departure tomorrow. There were some matters that needed to be dealt with in nearby cities; nothing critical but they needed to be done with before they left for the summit.

Interest seemingly piqued, Ceara tilted her head. "You...did?"

"Considering the amount of time you spent together and how loyal he's been to you, I expected nothing less, truthfully." His eyes skimmed each word, sentence, paragraph, and took all the information in despite talking with her at the same time. It somewhat amazed him that he became able to tune her out just enough to where he could answer her and read simultaneously.

"Even after all this…" The clattering that he heard, made him look askance for a brief moment to see Ceara as she placed the sheathed sword from her hip onto her lap. "I thought he would leave me too."

"Not everyone will react exactly the same."

"I suppose so," she sighed, coughing a little as she did so. When the coughs didn't subside after a few seconds, Kouen let his scroll down and reached to serve a small glass of water before passing it to her. Taking her time to drink it down, Ceara kept clearing her throat every other moment she breathed.

"Are you all right?"

"Parisa gave me some new medicine." Ceara reached over to get herself another glass, taking a few sips but mostly leaving it aside. "It's disgusting and leaves a horrible aftertaste. She said it would help my sleep and appetite problems, though."

"Again?" he said, remembering well the last time she had gone down that path as not the best of things.

She nodded with a small chuckle. "Both her and Seijin keep reminding me that I have to take better care of myself if I want to get better quickly. And well, I want to get better this time."

"No more dark thoughts like before?"

"Dark thoughts?"

Breathing out while thinking for a moment, Kouen replied. "The 'I rather looked forward to dying' ones."

A tiny 'oh' came from under her breath as she shrunk back into her chair. It took a few minutes for her to come back to the present and out of her train of thought. "I just…" she sighed through her nose as she pursed her lips, "it was kind of hard not to think like that—still is somewhat. But I've decided that even if they hate me, I will still protect and love them all the same. And if I'm going to do that then I have to be ready for anything that may come. Ergo, I have to be healthy, or at least relatively so."

"Your hallucinations have decreased as well, have they not?"

"Is Parisa part of your espionage too?"

"She's part of Kouha's vanguard. Kouha's part of my army. _Ergo_ ," he drawled out the word she had used, _"_ They answer to me, regardless."

"Chain of command does not equate servitude."

"For our military it does."

She shook her head at his baseless replies but went back to answer his original question. "They're few nowadays. They mostly wake me up now, although, I did have another one while awake yesterday."

"And you were alone?"

"Yes but I managed," she replied with a shrug of her shoulders. "Just breathe—" she mimicked, breathing in deeply with her eyes closed "—and exhale as so. I was told that hanging onto anything of substance also anchors me to reality, too. It helps when I am by myself."

"Be sure to be accompanied." Kouen's eyes shifted between the scroll and her, his concentration teetering to the latter at what she told him. "At least until after the two week period Parisa talked about is over."

"I'll be fine." But her assurances meant little to him. Blind couldn't guide the blind, after all. He didn't trust her lucid much less when she was lost in delusions. A moment before he was to voice that, she beat him to it, her hands tightly gripping the sheathed blade on her lap. "I wanted to ask you something actually. And it's something personal, too, so I want to make sure that it's fine if I do."

 _I shouldn't be digging that grave any deeper than what it already is._

"What is it?"

The sheer confirmation gave her enough confidence to speak despite her eyes laying right on the blade. "Why is it that you conquer and keep expanding the Kou Empire?"

Odd. He heard nothing even remotely close to personal in any of that. Regardless, he answered. "It was what my father wanted and what Emperor Hakutoku, Prince Hakuyuu and Prince Hakuren began. As part of Kou's army and the imperial family, I wanted the same even after they passed. I continue their legacy and wish to unify this world."

"No." A heavy sigh came out of her as she laid her head back a little too hard against her chair. Confused by her reaction, Kouen waited for her to elaborate on how he had failed to answer her question. She mumbled under her breath about 'not wording things right' before attempting once more. "I'm not asking you, the First Imperial Prince of the Kou Empire. I'm asking you, Ren Kouen. Why do you use this amazing power you obtained to conquer and expand the rule of an empire?"

Now that sounded like what she meant by personal but nonetheless it wasn't as bad as he expected it to be. "To erase war from this world by unifying it."

"Erase war?"

"War creates a vicious cycle of hatred that amounts to more of its kind," he began, giving the simplest explanation he could. "Humans are incredibly fearsome creatures capable of horrendous acts of violence and destruction. But it's not for nothing. War is nothing more than two ideologies differing from one another; people are no different. But what breeds hatred is when the things they love are threatened."

 _You are the perfect example of that._

"Erasing war would erase the ultimate threat. Where there is no threat to what is loved, there is no reason for hatred to be born. And where there is no hatred, there will be no more reason to fight. The endless cycle of hatred would thus end."

"That's...quite the circular thinking."

"But it is an end that is achievable."

"I wish I could believe that as strongly as you do," she admitted and paused briefly to take a deep breath. "Then let me ask, what if there's a flaw in that argument. What if hatred is born without their loved ones being under threat. What if...there exists people in the world that cause havoc and suffering without motive? What would you do with them?"

"There exists no such thing."

"Humor me."

 _What a ridiculous idea._ "Ideally?" She nodded. "Keep a watchful eye and let it sort out as it will."

"What about that whole cycle you mentioned? If all they're going to cause is chaos, why not rid the world of it? It would be the right thing to do."

"Right or not, killing someone because they disagree with you will lead nowhere." He placed the scroll down and fully faced her as she did the same to him. Her gaze was intense, inquisitive, wanting an answer to the query she had. "You will find so many that fit that criteria, especially if you base it on personal views."

"But regardless of bias," she continued arguing, "wouldn't ridding the world of someone like that be the right thing to do?"

"There is no right answer to what you're asking."

"How can there not be?" she argued, her voice rising a pitch. "Shouldn't it be common sense to eliminate a mindlessly destructive and universal threat like that?"

"Where are you getting all this from?"

That question got her to stop briefly, though the fire in her eyes at the argument didn't cease to be. "N-nowhere. It's just a question. Rhetorical."

"Does not seem likely," he refuted. "Not from the way you're arguing."

"I'm not arguing," she grumbled before taking her sword and raising from her sit. "If you're going to be unreasonable—"

"Did you bite your tongue?"

Her cheeks took a slight dust of pink at that accusation but she frowned instead of answering the childish jab. Pulling at her skirts that got stuck at the armrest of the chair, she stalked over to the windowsill and sat down the farthest she could from the desk. Laying down her sword and taking a nearby scroll without looking at it, she ignored him after that and simply settled down to read.

Scoffing, Kouen didn't bother with her tantrum and went back to reading himself. But as silent hours passed, part of his mind meandered to a loose thought that he couldn't understand or quite let go off. That whole talk about a 'universal threat' and 'people who destroy without reason' bothered him. Especially when she seemed so adamant about being right.

 _Where have I seen that before?_

A pair of blue eyes, one a shade paler than the other, flashed in his mind as he recalled from where. Hakuryuu. That same intense fire he saw burn in Hakuryuu's eyes was the same one that he briefly saw flicker in her stark blue ones. She held steadfast to her idea; one that, the more he thought about, sounded more like an excuse.

 _And with what's been happening recently, it's obvious for what._

His grip on Hakuryuu's mindset, as nonexistent as it may have been, was greatly distorted. The boy was too far gone, lost in both revenge and hatred to ever be a liable king's vessel. Ceara looked to follow in that path without realizing it and her motive, despite being much more reachable with the target he knew she had in mind, was becoming just as distorted.

 _But it's preventable._

Without making a sound, Kouen raised from his chair, his sheathed blade in one hand, and came to stand before Ceara who laid asleep from her medication on the windowsill. Peaceful as she was, Kouen could almost accurately predict the kinds of thoughts she was concocting to justify her means and ends. Even a pacifist, when threatened—when what mattered was threatened—would attack. He needed to avoid that.

Taking his sword in hand, the hilt hovering over her along with the metal ornament, he let Phenex's powers come from a mere thought. Small rose-colored bird's wings sprouted from the metal vessel as it flew from its nest and perched just on Ceara's forehead. The small bird swept its wings across her temple before sinking in, leaving a hue of rose light across her skin and disturbing her mildly in her sleep. As soon as the hue left, though, the slight frown that had come to her face disappeared as she fell soundly back to sleep.

Caution, that was what he was opting for. Placing an egg in her was for the best, just in case she thought of doing something absurdly idiotic.

" _She is capable of destroying that egg before it even hatches, my king,"_ Phenex told him. _"She does posses Murmur, a djinn of life alike myself."_

"One that does not work at the moment," he reminded her in a quiet voice. "This is for the best."

Phenex didn't answer until after a moment of quiet. _"As you say, my king."_

It was. Whatever hatred or bloodlust she may have for Masami could not possibly be as great as Hakuryuu's for Gyokuen but he would rather be prepared than sorry. And if anything, Kouen would be sure to save at least one of them from whatever hatred consumed them.

* * *

Ceara took a deep breath of the outside, pulling the cowl a bit over her head as she meandered the streets of Balbadd while the people went about their day. After being cooped up in the palace for days on end because of what had happened, she had wanted to escape the walls that caged her. Thankfully, with Kouen being absent until later that morning, she had enough leeway to convince his retainers, including his household members, that she would return. They urged her to do so before the meeting with Sindria's ambassador, news that she had only just heard of then.

But with only three hours, she doubted it would be enough to enjoy her leashed freedom. Especially when En Shou and Shuu Kokuton, on behalf of their master, appointed both Seijin and Parisa to accompany her and make sure she returned before the welcome of the Sindrian ambassador. With them on the line, Ceara couldn't afford to mess around which meant she wasn't going to be missing the ambassador's welcome like she had planned to.

King Sinbad was a man she felt wary of. Without even a need to exchange a single word with her, Ceara had noticed his ill intentions and even the high-pitched noise that had rung when he was near. Everything about that man spelled trouble and she wanted nothing to do with him or his country. Now, though, she would have to deal with whomever had arrived that day.

And as her free time quickly drew to a close, she found herself much more bitter than she thought she would be. Choosing to forget about that matter until she was forced to think about it, Ceara smiled down and waved back at the children of Balbadd's orphan house as she, Seijin, and Parisa left the premises after having inspected them themselves.

"Everything looked well." Seijin had a skip to his walk as he jotted down a few things in a small parchment he'd brought along. "Thanks to the patronage, Balbadd's, Shika's, and Rakushou's have made splendid progress."

"That's a pretty neat thing you've done for them," Parisa called from her other side as the two flanked her.

"Nothing either of you, or anybody for that matter, wouldn't have done," she assured her.

"I've got to say, though," Seijin spoke, waiting for them as he walked a bit ahead. "They're beginning to fill up quick."

"No space?" Parisa asked.

"Not enough caretakers," he corrected before turning to Ceara. "The current staff seem a bit overwhelmed with the number of children."

Ceara sighed and began giving it some thought. Surely there had to be others who wished to help as the current staff did. Voicing this to Seijin, he agreed and vouched that he would search for such people to get a proper ratio of children to caretaker. Thanking him, Ceara focused more on enjoying the rest of their walk that was quickly leading them back to the the palace for that meeting.

"Sindria's ambassador?" Parisa asked as Seijin explained what bothered him and Ceara alike.

The boy nodded and began explaining to her. "We don't know who Prince Kouen asked for but whoever it is, it was said that they'll be the ones guiding his highnesses and his entourage out into the island were the summit meeting is supposed to take place."

"And there's a magi that's supposed to be there too?"

"Aladdin," Ceara offered, giving a name to their conversation and remembering well the bright blue eyes and pleasant smile of the young boy she'd briefly met. "Although, I doubt he'll be the only one going if that meeting's supposed to be as important as they keep saying it is."

"Will you go, lady general?" Parisa asked, curious.

Ceara couldn't help but chuckle at the odd title the girl gave her. After telling her about what he'd told the young magician, Ceara couldn't have been more cross with Seijin. But after speaking with Parisa about it, the young magician had been anything but condescending or ill willing. Out of everything, she called it tragic but said she wouldn't judge, stating that after seeing her fight so valiantly at Magnostadt that she didn't have a reason to. Ceara never thought that she would meet anyone that had come from that magic school, especially after its destruction, but apparently Parisa had gone to Balbadd in order to return home to Parthevia. In a turn of events, though, Prince Kouha and his magicians met her as they had left themselves to the plateau and the young prince seemed to have convinced her to join their cause. Ceara didn't know how but wasn't about to pry about her motives, not when she was so accepting of her own.

Remembering her question, Ceara shook her head and calmed their vocal bafflement with surrendering hands. "The meeting is quite interesting, I must admit, but I have a bad feeling about it."

"Bad feeling?" Parisa repeated.

She shrugged her shoulders in response. "Powers that huge assembling in one place? No matter how quiet the location and meeting's purpose has been kept, there's bound to be people that go with ill intentions."

 _Besides, I don't want to be in the vicinity of a man that I feel even worse about._

"But I thought Prince Kouen—"

Seijin's words, however, got quickly interrupted when a ruckus came to Ceara's ears taking her attention with it. Some feet ahead, a huge crowd had gathered and circled like vultures around whatever they were looking at.

"What's that?" Seijin muttered, he and Parisa stepping up as Ceara led them in.

The crowd was heavy and thick, making it harder to even push through. Once she managed to, however, the scene she saw before her hit heavy. A child injured, badly from the looks of it, with a group of young people around him. What revolted her the most were the imperial officials she saw but a few feet away from the boy. Simply standing there, doing nothing.

The crowd around them remained immobile even when there was a strong sense of urgency that small group to help the boy.

"You bastards! What the hell are you looking at?" one of the guards next to the official shouted out menacingly waving his spear about. "Do you want your tax points voided and rationing reduced so you all starve to death! Get out of here, now!"

And just like that the crowd began dissipating. Without thinking, Ceara stepped forward, surprising both Seijin and Parisa, and made her way to the young boy as the blond man held him in his lap. Kneeling down before them, Ceara stared at the makeshift bandaging they had made for him but his wounds looked too severe for that to work by itself.

"What is wrong with him?" she asked, lifting her head to meet the man before her, her breath hitching a bit at recognizing the ambers eyes with which he stared back at her.

 _This boy—where have I seen him?_

But as stupefied as he was, it was one of his companions that answered him: an older, taller woman completely decked in light armor and long sword at her back. "He was hit by a carriage. He has a head injury with a wounded left shoulder, arm, and ribs as well."

A young redhead girl, one who also appeared rather familiar to Ceara, spoke up alongside the warrior woman. "He needs a doctor."

With a nod, Ceara glanced over her shoulder and called Parisa over. Both her and Seijin walked up to the group as Ceara stood up to give her space. "Treat the boy for what you can, if you would."

"At once," she replied.

"What insolence!" There was no other response Ceara could muster but a groan at hearing the slimy old official that spoke as the guards stepped forward against her and her retainers. "Aiding a slave will have you stripped of your benefits! How dare a woman go against the law!"

"The law," she states turning to him with a snarl, "states that no slave will be harmed during their time enslaved, either by their owners or the government. You dare hide behind of the law and leave a child to die?"

"You're overstepping," he called out, his pale features growing red from his anger. With a swift motion of his sleeved arm, the old man beckoned the guards following him. "Arrest her this instant."

The moment the soldiers took a step forward, though, Seijin did as well, his arm outstretched to keep them separate despite her hand already reaching for her sword. "Dare raise your weapon against my master and you're the ones that will be arrested."

Before anyone could say anything else, either protest or be indignant about his interfering, Parisa spoke up from healing the boy. "He's out of the woods. But keeping him under care would be best, lady general."

One of the other young companions with the amber-eyed blond spoke up at hearing that. "General?"

 _So much for wanting some secrecy._ Pulling off her cowl to reveal herself, Ceara tilted her head as the official and soldiers stiffened at seeing her and immediately bowed without raising their heads, profusely apologizing about the confusion.

"Apologize all you want," she snarled through gritted teeth. "Trash like you disgust me. Jin—" Seijin quickly stood back to listen "—take him to the house."

"But master, the house is—"

"I know," she replied and smiled, "but we can't leave him here. We'll deal with that problem later." Understanding, Seijin went to the boy and took him in his arms as gently as he could. Parisa stood aside, assuring Seijin he'd take care of Ceara which made her chuckle before he left, before going back to Ceara's side. Turning to the group of young kids, she smiled down at them and bowed with a small salute. "Thank you so much for aiding the young boy. And rest assured, he will be taken care of where my retainer took him."

"Will he?" Ceara couldn't help but stare at the amber-eyed boy who had finally found his voice. Instead of replying, Ceara couldn't help her staring, wanting to know where she knew this boy from.

" _Magnostadt, my king,"_ Beleth offered. _"He's one of the metal vessels that you fought alongside with; Amon's master."_

"You have my word," she finally answered and took a step forward to him with a gentle smile. "Excuse my rudeness, but I believe we have met before. Back in Magnostadt."

The blond and the redhead girl took a minute to look at her, eyes narrowed, before they widened with the young man answering that query. "You're one of Kou's metal vessel users. The one with thr—"

"This is the ambassador sent from Sindria." Ceara groaned at the old man as he stepped forward to keep their conversation at a minimum. "He's the former third prince of Balbadd, exiled from his country."

"Irrelevant," Ceara told him, getting tired of his incessant talking. One thing did stick to her mind and she turned instead to the boy. "Sindria's ambassador?"

"Yes," he answered, his eyes somewhat lost and sometimes fleeting in the direction Seijin had left. "My name is Alibaba Saluja, General…"

"Reizei Kohaku." The name tasted bitter in her mouth after all that had happened, but she knew that there were still things to be done under that name. "But please, Kohaku is fine. After all, fighting alongside you was quite the event." Turning away toward the palace, Ceara sighed with a weary grin, "But I believe you have more important matters to attend to than chitchatting with me. Isn't that right?" His nod was all the answer she needed.

Sindria's ambassador, the same young man that helped them fight against the medium in Magnostadt: Alibaba Saluja. She had only seen him in passing and when he and Kouen had fought together but it had been a sight to remember all the same. The boy had been strong then and it made her wonder just how much stronger he'd gotten since.

Addressing him and his companions, Ceara asked if she could join them on their way back to the palace. Alibaba was the one they let answer and he agreed. It only took a few minutes to reach the palace by carriage. Near the entrance the official called out to her, saying that she needed to reconvene with the other military personnel that were attending.

But she had other ideas in mind. "I'll enter along with Sindria's ambassador."

"G-General?" the old man stammered. He clearly was taken aback by her statement and he didn't seem to be the only one.

"I'm sure his highness won't mind," she replied, waving a hand dismissively his way. Not waiting for him to leave, Ceara walked before the group and motioned a hand forward at Alibaba. "If you would follow me, I'll show you the way."

Alibaba simply nodded with the same far-off and bleak expression she'd seem on him since they met in the city. Taking that for what it may be, she walked ahead, hearing them walk behind her, and entered the grand foyer.

The people all around peered down, practically throwing daggers at all who had entered with Alibaba. Even she could feel some directed at her, whether they were or not was something she couldn't discern and frankly didn't care for. One of the many officials in the room called out over the silent, prostrating crowd, announcing their prince, general commander and governor.

 _So many damn titles. How cumbersome._

Nonetheless she played along. Stepping aside and apart from the small group, she and Parisa both showed their respect with a swift bow and salute. Everything was quiet for a brief second before a gruff voice rang through the room.

They reprimanded Alibaba for not prostrating, claiming that he had no royal standing and as such should do as his retainers and show respect. Another voice, one she recalled as that old official from before, called to the contrary; Alibaba needed not prostrate. The Saluja Household no longer existed and the boy was but a mere ambassador with no ties to Balbadd.

 _Well, they placed him neatly between a rock and a hard place._

He either forfeited his heritage and country or showed complete submission to the Kou Empire. Neither of which were good if his position was considered. _Poor kid._

But the time she felt sorry for him didn't last long before Alibaba took a knee and bowed. He made his choice, apparently. Not like either would have been any good. But that quickly changed when out of nowhere he called out to Kouen, "Here in Balbadd, we have an old custom. That is, the act of touching the ground with one's head is to pray for a pregnant woman to have an easy delivery. Are you still fine with this?"

Ceara had to actually undo her salute to cover her mouth lest the laughter that bubbled in her actually surfaced. Pregnant?That was priceless. The single comment raised havoc as whispers crossed the entire room and it wasn't until one of the military captains present barked out for everyone to rise that Ceara let out a small chuckle before rising with everybody else.

 _What a bright kid._

Her ears suddenly rang when out of nowhere Kouen let out a loud laughter. It lasted a few breaths but it shocked her all the same; the closest to that she'd ever heard was the small half-scoffs that sounded like chuckles. That, though, had been a full half second of it.

 _What a kid indeed._

Raising from his throne, Kouen discarded the fancy wardrobe he'd been wearing over his usual outfit, letting it fall haphazardly before stepping down towards Alibaba with his household members following suit. She stood to the side as Kouen talked to Alibaba as if nothing; even Kin Gaku addressed the redhead girl from before with a 'long time no see.' It was only after he had invited Alibaba to discuss about the answers he sought that his gaze leveled to the side to meet Ceara's indifferent glance.

"You left the palace without a proper convoy." It hadn't been a question. Ceara knew for a fact that En Shou and Shuu Kokuton had told him what she'd convinced them of and apparently their choice of detail hadn't been good either.

"That's not true; I took Seijin and Parisa with me." The gaudy reply wasn't going to cut it, though. "I got tired of inhaling nothing but alcohol and antiseptic."

It was the truth but he didn't seem to acknowledge it as a good enough excuse for leaving from what she could see. Even through his impassive expression, Ceara could tell the small glint of annoyance that lingered in his crimson gaze. That all changed, though, when out of nowhere his voice took a rather uneasy tone. "You're pale. Are you certain you're feeling fine?"

"What?" Parisa instantly perked.

Ceara couldn't help but cringe. Despite the concern that Ceara knew those words would usually mean, she was well aware of what he had intended by them. And it had worked to work up the magician that was obsessed with keeping her as healthy as possible. Flocking over like a mother hen, Ceara had to push Parisa away constantly but ended up getting dragged to the infirmary ward for a check-up, completely missing Kouen leaving with Alibaba and the rest of the group.

She wanted to go. She wanted to listen to what those two had to talk about with each other. But the mother hen that Parisa was didn't allow her to leave the infirmary until she checked her well-being completely. Because of Kouen's simple words, Parisa took over an hour to finish and by then, Ceara was hurrying to one of the many war council rooms with Parisa and Seijin trotting after her to keep up.

Luckily, it seemed the meeting was ongoing still as from afar she caught the sight of Kouen's and Koumei's household members standing outside of the meeting room. Shockingly, however, Kouen was not inside the room and instead waited outside for some reason.

"Did the meeting end?" she called out, running up to him a bit out of breath.

He eyed her for a moment before turning away uninterested. "I assumed Parisa would take longer."

Ceara couldn't help but get annoyed by that, especially because it was such a blatant confession to what he had intended his pseudo-concern to cause. All the same, she pulled a smile despite one end of her lips twitching. "She works very efficiently. Of course, that's besides the fact that I was completely fine."

"Shame."

He was clearly avoiding her question. But frankly, she had just asked out of courtesy; she didn't need him either way to listen.

 _Bele._

" _Of course, my king."_

Standing still and letting his powers surge through her, Ceara enhanced her hearing beyond what it already was to listen in even beyond the walls. It wasn't needed—she could have just as easily heard the muffled and distinct sound of their voices had she focused by herself—but she didn't want to miss anything that either Kouen, or Koumei, by the looks of it, would say to Alibaba to convince him of whatever it was they wanted.

And Koumei, boy was he giving a flawless argument. And it was one Ceara had heard plenty of times from both brothers. The way Koumei was telling it to Alibaba, though, appeared to be much more forceful, as if to make him understand something he didn't seem to grasp. Almost like a parent reprimanding and teaching a child a lesson.

"He's quite a brat."

Ceara couldn't keep the chill that ran across her body when Kouen spoke, her delicate hearing uptaking way too much detail from someone so close and making her stop.

Brat. Ceara wouldn't deny he was young, perhaps some years younger than herself, but he was human too. That he believed in the world as he did, that the means didn't justify the end, didn't make him a brat. Just somewhat naive but brave all the same for believing in them when they lived in such world.

 _He's braver than me with how dauntlessly he voices his opinions._

And if anything, Ceara could admire one who didn't back down before authority. One who thought by themselves and didn't adhere to common sense regardless of whichever they happened to believe in. But the more their conversation went on, the more Ceara was beginning to realize that Koumei was cracking down on the boy.

The moment he questioned Alibaba for an answer and Kouen made his way to the door to reenter, Ceara followed suit, ignoring every household member that called out for her to remain outside. Being the last to enter, she closed the behind her so nobody would reach to bring her back out. Out of the three, only Koumei eyed her and even then it was for the briefest of moments. They weren't bothered by her intrusion it seemed. All the better for her honestly.

Facing Alibaba, she could see how distraught the poor thing was because of what Koumei had told him. He said he understood, that the talk did open his mind to a far wider point of view, but that he couldn't throw away all the small things for such greater good.

It was the never ending question with no answer: was it worth doing everything and anything in the present, even disregarding it, for a better future. It even got him to compare the Kou Empire with Al-Thamen, a name she hadn't heard before being used to refer to the organization. And then he let loose completely, letting the conviction in his beliefs bring him the confidence to speak out against Koumei and Kouen's views.

Ceara could very well see where these two seemed to fare, they wanted a better future, but they clearly differed in the how. Where Koumei saw logic and prosperity for the future, Alibaba saw honesty and compassion for the present.

What tore at her was that she agreed with both. Having studied under Koumei, she comprehended the need for a better future, but like Alibaba she had fought with tooth and nail to safeguard the people now. She couldn't agree with only one because her conscious didn't allow her to disregard either completely.

Her train of thought got derailed when Kouen disregarded him completely, telling him that simply by barking nothing would change. He wasn't wrong but he certainly wasn't making things any better. Ceara had certainly expected this kind of callousness from Kouen and even saw the underlying threat of harm also coming, but this was driving the kid against a corner. He was tearing Alibaba piece by piece until he agreed, and she had seen this done before and hated it every time. Inclusion through force never worked for the better; it reigned through fear and power. And she knew fear and power could only control a person for so long. All Kouen was doing with his words was wrapping a rope lightly around Alibaba's neck and letting the boy decide whether to jump or simply teeter on the edge to survive.

 _It shouldn't be like this._

Ceara knew the two of them would be furious with what she wanted to do. All the same, though, she ignored that logical part of her for a moment and took a step forward. The moment she did the unease that showed in Alibaba's eyes lessened a small bit. Good, at least he felt less threatened by her.

"I understand where you are coming from, Alibaba," she began with a small smile, approaching him enough to hopefully block off his view of the two brothers behind her. "Balbadd, this country and it's people, is like a family to you. The fierceness and desire to protect your people is something I can comprehend. I protect my own and those I cherish with the same dedication. And I must admit that in the effort to do so I have done things I am not proud of, horrible things that I regret doing."

 _Many indeed._ She paused briefly to let those thoughts come and go, but as another surfaced, her hands came to rest on the sword at her side and the necklace that laid upon her bosom. "But when I think of my sister's smile or my brother's laughter, I understand the necessity for sacrifices."

"You condone this oppression and erasure?" he asked somewhat incredulous.

"Not fully," she replied frankly. "But I do what I can to not let everything be gone when the unified world comes to be. I came to terms a long time ago that there is no such thing as a peaceful world without sacrifice. And sometimes drastic changes are needed so that as many of those sacrifices can be avoided."

"What you're doing is sacrificing the few for the good of the many," he explained, at this point he himself trying to make her see something she didn't appear to. "Those few matter just as much!"

 _He's right._

"And it's a deficit that I fight to ameliorate because I know it cannot be fully remedied. Like you, I don't agree with the methods, especially the forcefulness that their highnesses are using to influence your answer. After all, your alliances clearly lie elsewhere with King Sinbad. And I'm sure he does seem like this brilliant man capable of anything which is what makes you hesitate." _But this king isn't what he seems._ At least that that was what she felt because after having met the man and seen how he ployed, it was clear that he had something clearly hidden behind those smiles. And she couldn't think it was anything good.

Shaking the thought aside and smiling at Alibaba, she stepped forward placing her hand on his shoulder and meeting his eyes, "But I assure you, by joining this cause you will be working towards the betterment of your own people and for Balbadd as a whole now and in the future. And in the process of helping Balbadd, you will be aiding us on a much bigger and brighter future for the world itself."

As she finished, though, Alibaba's gaze fell from her own. "I understand what trying to tell me. But even so…"

Ceara felt a bit surprised that he hadn't budge as much as she'd hoped. It had been plainly obvious that Kouen and Koumei were instigating him because they wanted him on Kou's side. And although she couldn't tell why exactly, she didn't want his free will robbed from him because of their coercion. But he refused to choose them.

 _And I've done all I can to make this transition easier._ Because despite whatever Alibaba thought, Ceara knew that the two brothers, especially Kouen, would do anything to convince him.

"Enough of your petty arguments." Unsheathing his sword and aiming it at Alibaba, Ceara was forced back by the sheer presence of it. "Alibaba Saluja, become my right hand man."

 _There it is._ And he didn't stop with that _simple_ order. Kouen demanded he cut all ties with Sindria and join them as a general of the Kou Empire. And he was hitting the boy with everything he had, essentially breaking him to pieces like she feared he would. And the final blow just destroyed him.

"Fine," Kouen called, giving him his back. "You can live the rest of your life under Sinbad, if you want. And you can also forget everything about Balbadd."

 _He won't._ To live under someone's shadow and forget everything of what made him who he was—

"If you just say 'follow me'...then I don't have any other choice..."

"Unbelievable…" she muttered under her breath walking up to one of the chairs around the table and taking a seat. And here she had thought that the boy would amount to more. He had the power, he had the right values, but he seriously lacked conviction in himself.

" _You cannot judge the circumstances of another,"_ Beleth told her. _"Whatever he's been through—"_

 _Is honestly none of my business._ But as things stood now, it didn't matter either way. Koumei was already setting down their conditions for his joining them. Cut ties with Sindria, present a concrete and presently lacking viewpoint for ruling Balbadd, and marry into the Ren family .

That last one caught her off guard. And it bothered her even more when Kougyoku's name came forth. Unable to sit still as they threw her name around for such thing, Ceara rose purposefully making her way to Kouen. But before she could even raise her voice to debate the usage of his sister—what was more a general he himself named—Koumei stopped her.

"You've done enough."

His words and the stare he gave her kept Ceara at bay. They clearly hadn't appreciated her speaking up and without even saying a thing seemed to have agreed on keeping her from interfering any further.

Thankfully, Alibaba wasn't enthuse about the arrangement either. Ceara hadn't been wrong at thinking he had the right values with how against having concubines he was. The sudden subject of being called a 'cherry boy' clearly took its toll and out of nowhere, Kouen let out a massive laugh that echoed and made Ceara cover her ears from how loud it had been. With Kouen's crude comment afterwards, Alibaba equipped his Amon's sword, threatening to attack him but was luckily stopped by Koumei who immediately ushered him out of the council room.

Once out, Koumei came back and closed the doors behind himself before heaving a sigh. "He is a capable person that we can use."

"I agree." Ceara couldn't fathom how they could speak so freely even with her there but it didn't seem to bother them in the slightest that she was clearly in earshot of their conversation. They kept talking and she merely listened closely.

So that was it: they wanted Alibaba to bring Aladdin to their side. The two had seemed close when she met them in Magnostadt but they must be very good friends if they believed he would follow with Alibaba on their side.

"As for you." Ceara raised from her seat the moment she heard Kouen's stern tone directed at her. "It appears I greatly overestimated you. I knew you were naive but to ally yourself to his idiotic ideals is something that I didn't think you capable of doing."

"Just because they're simplistic in your eyes doesn't make them naive."

"It's not just simplistic," Koumei corrected with a tilt of his head. "It's ignorant. And I thought you would understand what is truly at stake and what there is to gain from all this because of what you've gone through."

Kouen turned to her with an eyebrow raised, looking rather peeved before letting out a deep sigh. "Is this how you convince those you conquer?"

He wasn't the only one. "You've known this since I took over General Koujiro's army. I do admit that I sometimes found myself using violence and force to accomplish my tasks but I never did so with pleasure and seldom saw them as absolute control. People should be allowed the freedom to choose, not forced to submission."

Unable to keep it to himself, Kouen scoffed with a shake of his head. "You're beginning to sound as idiotic as Alibaba. Surely you'd fit best with Sindria and that king, Sinbad, as well."

 _Where the hell did that kind of childish jab come from?_ In spite of knowing how low that was and that she shouldn't even consider answering, her annoyance that was quickly starting to turn for the worse controlled her and got her to raise her voice.

"King Sinbad sounded like a formidable man and a terrifying force." Her tone suddenly turned sour, remembering the ill feeling she'd gotten when she met those eyes of melted gold. "But he's a man that hides too much behind smiles. And I've seen my share of liars and deceivers to justify my hate for them."

Kouen was quick to retort. "And you're no different. Frankly, had I not known you, I would say you spun that talltale about your siblings for the sake of convincing that brat. And whether it was true or not, it wouldn't have made a difference."

Hearing that made something in Ceara snap. For a second she saw nothing but white and felt her body moving still as it drove her forth, lifting her hand and bringing it down with force. As her vision returned, her stark blue eyes glared at crimson tinted gold, his head unmoving despite the hard blow she'd given with her open hand against his cheek.

But as anger corroded her mind, making her eyes sting, she corrected him on the absurd suggestion he just made. "You can question my judgment, my ethics, and even where my loyalties lie where you and this empire are concerned all you want. You can call me anything you want because I assure you there's nothing you can say that hasn't been spat at me before. But don't you _dare—_ " her quiet hiss turning to a louder snarl "—don't you ever dare question the love and fidelity I have for them." Too livid to think straight, Ceara stormed out of the council room leaving in her wake nothing but silence.

* * *

Blissful quiet.

Rakah had forgotten a long time ago what that was like. Nothing but the quiet of nature entered the room he was in while he awaited for its owner to come back. As he did, his fingers fidgeted with the small magic item that hung around his neck hidden beneath his clothes. The small, crystal sphere bore nothing but Light magic that glowed a faint gold after being half-used. He seriously hated borrowed magic but there was no other way to travel aside from her magic. At least she was still on his side and he could use her to refill it whenever he was close to running out.

 _How useful that small sparrow turned out to be._ _And easy to work with too._

The same could be said about this little Speirr. Just as the thought of her came to mind, the doors to the room got thrown open before getting slammed closed with as much force before the little girl burst into the bedroom.

And she looked beyond furious the instant her eyes met his. That look lasted a single breath before she stormed away from him to the opposite side of the room. "Get the hell out of here. I don't feel like talking."

"Seems like it," he agreed with a scoff. Not fearing for his life like he knew he should have at meeting an angry woman, Rakah stood from leaning against her bed and walked her way. "What happened?"

"Leave, Rakah. Now," she snarled but couldn't hide the tears that sprung from the corners of her eyes.

 _Oh, little lamb is hurt._ It didn't look like something meaningless either. Rakah could guess a couple of things that could make her mad enough to the point of crying. And he gave his most likely guess a shot. "Was it that prince?"

Feeling the hit that came, Rakah stepped back to avoid her punch before she shouted, "Shut up!"

"It was him," he said, realizing he'd guessed correctly. But it didn't seem to be just about him. "Did he badmouth you? Or was it them?"

"You have ten seconds before I throw you out. Ten." The eight-pointed star on her bracelet shone as her hands became enveloped in the dark energy from Marbas' powers, the powers even starting to change her features as her incisors grew. "One."

"Calm down, now." But she didn't listen and lurched forward instead. Easy to read but knowing she would destroy half the place if he let it go by, Rakah called forth his own powers, enveloping his hands the same way hers were before taking her attack head on. Clasping her hands against his, he nulled her magic with his essentially breaking her out of the half djinn-equip she'd gotten into. Startled that it was gone but still angry, she jerked her hands trying her hardest to break away from his grip. "Now listen and relax, Ceara," he whispered as she continued struggling. He kept repeating those words until she only struggled a few times. Rakah could tell she was still in a rage, he could see it clearly in her eyes, but at least she was listening.

"Now, what happened?"

"He's an arrogant asshole."

 _Whoa._ It still baffled him every time he heard such vulgarities out of her mouth, especially when before all he would hear were sweet, meek words. This wasn't that. And with the pieces that presented themselves now, he needed to work with them. "Let me guess," he said lowering both their hands, "he said something about your siblings."

Yanking her hands, she broke away from him and began pacing the room to let her anger boil out. But it didn't seem to be enough as she began kicking at walls and the furniture around her. "He's the idiot that insinuated that I used them for sympathy!" she screeched. "All I did was tell the truth and he derides me for doing so."

Good. Both of them were playing against each other. It made his job much simpler. "And it's how you always do things, isn't it?" She didn't answer; she just kept pacing around, occasionally kicking at the wall. "He doesn't understand you. The way you do good is by advocating for the lesser evil. And even then you're better at it than most I've seen. Those two claim to do good for the sake of the future and leave you and the rest to deal with the vermin that infests the present."

That comment seemed to make her slow down a bit as her head lowered and her arms came up to warp around herself. "And even when I told him, he doesn't understand. It's just not right for the people like her, like those bastards from this parliament, or anybody else to be allowed to do such horrendous things without any consequences."

 _Contradict then advocate._

"What about you?" he asked. "Where's your due punishment?"

"I lost their trust and love," she instantly responded. "I'm left alone without them. Sousei was right; this is the worse punishment. But those others?"

Rakah nodded. "They're allowed to do all those things because they fit into the hierarchy of this empire's rule. And you're right, none of them will be punished because, let's face it, why would a prince care? After all, he let Masami go, right?"

"Yeah."

 _Oh beautiful._ He needed to spin it more. Better. Tighter. Just enough to have her where he wanted her. "He let her leave and take them?"

"He did."

"And he's beginning to let you fall as well, just like he's done that other boy. I'm sorry, Speirr, but you have to face the truth. He doesn't care about you; he never did."

"He..." Her voice drawled as her gaze left his and went past him towards her bed. Rakah couldn't stop her as she sidestepped him to reach her bedside table. He turned to see her taking a silver carnation hair comb from where it laid atop the table.

Slowly, Rakah saw how the anger began to leave her eyes and started being replaced by confusion. He watched her as he backed up and sat at the edge of her bed, holding the piece tightly in her hands with her eyes closed and lips pursed, deep in thought.

He walked closer to her and reached out to touch her. "Ceara?"

Before he even reached her, she shot up completely ignoring him and left the room. As she left, Rakah didn't feel the malice or anger follow her like he had when she had arrived. Instead, all he felt was turmoil in her wake; a confusion that she was fighting to understand. _Damn it._ With her anger leaving, those ideas from before didn't have enough time to fully plant themselves in her mind. Something about that stupid comb made her think twice about her ire. Uncertainty haunted her still.

She wasn't as isolated as Rakah had thought she had been. Here he thought that driving those brats out of her life would be enough. He hadn't accounted for the relationships she had built there with the imperial family. Rakah needed her completely isolated for this to work.

 _And she won't be unless I break her conviction in them._ But that was doable, especially when he'd seen what pitting their contradicting beliefs did. And seeing how easily it had been for them to fall out on their own, Rakah could simply factor out the commonality that triggered her and use that.

He only needed to set the pieces in place like before and let her play it out. And he had just the pawn to do his work for him again.

"Don't worry, Ceara," he whispered to himself. "You'll see I'm right. Just like little sparrow, you'll call for my help. And I'll be here to answer when no one else will."

* * *

Still panting heavily, Ceara stood back for a moment to let herself breathe, the sweat running down her body as she undid Marbas' equip. There were no widespread woods near Balbadd, but the outside barracks that were rarely used at that time had to do. No one had gone to bother her. It surprised her that she hadn't even seen Seijin or Parisa hovering over her like before. But surely they must've been told not to after she ran out of the council room.

After hours of mindlessly bashing things with Marbas, Ceara had finally cleared her anger-clouded mind. And without it, she had been able to think straight about what had happened that afternoon. She didn't quite understand why their bantering started. Sure, perhaps he had been mad about her crude interruption with Alibaba but had he been, he would have stopped her the instant she opened her mouth. Instead, Kouen had let her speak and she had done so without restriction to whatever result that had given.

But as their conversation had gone on, it took turns that she didn't understand no matter how many times she replayed their exchange. Their bickering had been like two children fighting over nothing.

" _It certainly sounded like it."_ Beleth pointing that out didn't help. _"And your reaction did seem a bit…"_

"Don't say it," she urged, hiding her face behind her hands.

" _Oh, I will!"_ Marbas called out. _"Over the top, over reacting, unnecessary—"_

"I get it!" she exclaimed and fell back against the floor. Pursing her lips, she glanced up at the sky that was changing in color as dusk began to fall and clouds began to quickly roll by.

After hours of thinking it over, she hated that she agreed with them. She'd been so overcome with anger and the bitter grief that resurfaced at his misplaced comment that she acted without thinking. She hadn't even known what she'd done until after it was over. And even then her emotions drove her past it to talk back too.

Ceara wouldn't deny that his words hadn't hurt or that it had been right for him to say them—it hadn't—but she hadn't done any better by hurting him. In fact, she felt that she stooped lower by doing that. Times like these when she couldn't control her emotions were the times that she doubted Murmur's sanity.

 _Vainglory, champions, ferocity, and nature I get but innocence and martyrdom?_

It didn't make sense to her.

But their choices seldom made sense to her; they were djinn that nobody knew anything about. Her own choices were beginning to seem muddy even. Was she really doing the right thing? Why had she even gained these powers? What the hell was she even using them for?

" _That's an answer only you have, little lamb,"_ Beleth replied. _"And whatever it may be, rest assured that it will be true so long as it comes from you."_

So long as it came from her…

 _Why and for what do I have these powers?_

Not to fight. Not to conquer. She wasn't like them; she knew that from the bottom of her heart. But she felt like she had answered that question before. Many times, actually.

 _To protect those I love._

 _Is that the right thing to do with them?_

As a king vessel, should she be like those others she'd met and try to lead people into better things? Be like Sinbad and create a country or like Kouen and lead her own people to a better future or even like Alibaba who fought for what he believed.

No, that wasn't right. That was them. That wasn't her.

Whenever she had any power, Ceara would use it to help herself and those who needed it. With Beleth, she had been able to help Koujiro fight and reduce casualties in the Southern Army. With Marbas, she been able to help her own sanity by being able to be herself. With Murmur…

 _I killed._

No, she did more than just that. With Murmur, Ceara had learned the value of life. She learned the value of death. And she learned to forgive and move forward.

 _I learned to live._

And living meant making mistakes and learning from them. Ceara knew she made a mistake by acting without thinking, by letting her emotions take over her. By acting like she wasn't still hurting from the twins leaving her.

And she needed to learn from those mistakes.

The roar of thunder surprised her somewhat as the storm that came out of the blue quickly took over the once orange skies to let a pour fall. Staring up at the now darkened sky, Ceara let the droplets that fell drench her to the bone, liking how the coolness somewhat soothed her aching muscles.

 _And when someone makes a mistake they should apologize._

That was as good a start as anything. Brushing her wet hair back and grabbing the hair comb tightly in her hand, Ceara ran out of the open barracks towards the first place she had in mind. To her surprise, though, the study was empty. Or so she thought until a familiar silhouette came out from behind one of the shelves.

"What do you want?" Oh, yeah. Koumei was indeed mad at her for what had happened, too. And he had a right to be.

"Where is he?"

"You really expect me to tell you after what you did this afternoon?"

"Look, I'll talk things out with you later. I promise," she said, childishly raising her hand, "but right now, I really need to talk with your brother first."

"I doubt talking is the only thing you'll do," he retorted.

"I'm sorry about that," she replied. "I really am, and I want to tell him that. Now, would you please tell me where he is?"

Koumei hesitated for a moment, his gaze askance, before he sighed and came to meet her eyes again while rubbing the back of his neck. "What a pain you are. He's in his bedchambers."

"Thank you, Mei," she muttered before spinning on her heels, slipping a bit from her wet shoes, before taking off towards the Eastern side of the palace. Thankfully, the layout of the royal edifices anywhere was mostly alike which made it easier for her to get to his bedchambers.

As expected, though, she could see his household members standing guard for their imperial prince. And she doubted they were going to let her through even if she asked.

 _But desperate times, right Bele?_

" _They are household members, my king. This might be bit harder."_

Sliding off to the side before she even got close to them, she took her feather-pen and weapon-equipped. "...let's try then…" she whispered before ringing her staff and letting her own voice mix in as she hummed. She rarely practiced with her sound magic to control others, mostly animals, but never really had done it with people. But as she hummed, her only thought was to pacify them enough to make them impressionable. After a few seconds of that, Ceara took the risk and stepped out before going straight to them. As she came closer she noted that it was En Shou and Shuu Kokuton standing guard but their usual alertness seemed cloudy. Close enough to the door to reach it, Ceara extended hers hand slowly to open the door but gasped when En Shou's arm shot out rather languidly.

It was working but they were still somewhat alert.

"It's okay," she whispered between her humming. "I just want to speak to him." Reaching up, she lowered his arm slowly and it surprised her that he complied so easily. Careful not to get spook like that again, she opened and walked through the door before closing it behind her. Once she noticed the antechamber was empty, she made her way, staff still in hand, towards the bedchamber doors. Taking one of the handles in her hand, she slowly began sliding the door open but the moment she got the full thing across, a flash of steel crossed her vision a half second after she heard it whistle through the air. Instinctively, she brought her staff up to block the sword that had been aimed at her neck.

The instant her stark blue eyes met crimson tinted gold, she heard the loudest groaned of annoyance she'd ever heard from Kouen.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?"

Despite the odd encounter—partly because of her sense of urgency—Ceara cut right to the chase. "I came to talk."

He groaned again before letting his sword fall and eyeing the door that led outside of the antechamber. "What did you do to En Shou and Shuu Kokuton?" Lifting her staff meekly, she gave him a small smile as the rings hit each other making the soft noise. This time he sighed while pinching the bridge of his nose. "Undo it."

"F-Fine," she muttered and undid her weapon-equip. A solid minute after that, the doors to his antechamber opened brusquely as both household members hunched over to enter the room in a rush, nasty looks directed at her.

"We apologize, young master," En Shou said first and foremost with a bow. "We will rid you of this intruder."

"Forget it." Ceara couldn't have been gladder that she wouldn't be manhandled by them. "Return to your post. I'll deal with her." The two household members gave each other a sidelong glance before bowing and excusing themselves, closing the door behind them.

Turning to thank him, Ceara instead watched as Kouen walked back to the inside of his room. Following suit, she had to take a moment to admire the luxurious bedchambers that he had. The bedroom itself was far larger than any other she'd seen in the whole palace and the same could be said about the bed itself. Some other doors were to one side of the room, surely leading further into the chambers. A large array of shelves stood against the other wall along with a desk that had a lit oil lamp and scroll spread across it.

"You were reading." It had been the reason why she had gone to the study first. "Why aren't you—"

"I don't need a reason," he quickly said, shutting her down. "And I knew that it would be the first place you would go to."

"You did?" she asked with a tilt of her head.

Kouen only glanced over his shoulder before shaking his head and sighing. "You said you're here to talk?"

"Yes," she instantly spoke up coming closer as he went to the desk. "I wanted to…" Her words quickly died in her throat though the moment the light hit his face. A reddish mark marred the left side of his face and the sight of it made her feel horrible. Reaching out without thinking, she pursed her lips as she laid her fingers gently on his cheek. Tender still from being a few hours old, Ceara barely got the fleeting of his eyes as they landed on her hand.

Unable to form any other words, she simply let herself talk. "...I'm sorry." Sliding her hand against his cheek, she could feel the warmth against her cool palm.

He raised an eyebrow in disbelief. "You didn't seem apologetic before."

She grimaced taking her hand back before answering. "Let me explain—"

"Do," he simply said while setting his sword aside and leaning against the desk with arms crossed over his chest.

Taking a deep breath, she let her thoughts sort themselves out a bit before speaking. "What I did...I shouldn't have. Not because you're the prince but simply because...I shouldn't have. I didn't mean my anger to get so out of hand. I didn't even realize what came over me until afterwards."

"What about what you said?"

"What I said?"

He nodded. "Does this mean you retract what you said as well?"

"Excuse me?" she said springing forward a bit annoyed, her semblance of regret somewhat gone. "I wasn't the one that went overboard with the remark about my siblings."

"You were the one that resorted to violence."

"And I'm apologizing for that." Ceara stopped briefly to take a deep breath. "It was my mistake and I see that now; I shouldn't have, especially in front of Koumei, no matter how mad I was. But I won't back out of what I said. For as much of the wrong I hold, you also hold some of it. And don't say you don't because we both know you do."

Staring her directly in the eye for a moment, Ceara had to hold her ground against him again. She was sorry about what had happened but she wasn't going to back down on what she said. She had meant every word.

"You're an idiot" was all he replied with before standing straight and pointing at the chair. When she only stared quizzically at it, he sighed heavily before saying, "Sit." It struck her as odd but as he went off to do something else, she took a sit on the chair, with her legs out to the one side facing the desk with the chair's back to her left. Skimming the scrolls on the desk for a second, she saw some annotations on a map before her whole vision was obscured by something soft and somewhat heavy landing over her head and face. When she struggled to turn or stand, she only felt steady hands holding her down. "Stay put."

She opted to listen and it was then that she felt his hands rubbing the towel over her head, her hair going every which way as he did that.

"I knew you would recognize what you had done wrong; that you had overdone it." Ceara didn't move as he began talking, his hands moving slower around her head. "And I also knew you wouldn't retract what you said regardless of what I told you."

"Really?" But he didn't answer that. Instead, though, she asked, "So are you mad?"

"The only reason I am is because you forgot months of work and let your emotions get the best of you," he explained. "You need to learn."

"I know," she murmured to herself, lowering her head and turning his hair comb in his hands. "But it's like it gets harder the more I try. The only thing that seems to have gotten better is how fast I calm down afterwards. So I took my time to cool off and started thinking. About a lot of things actually. And I know what I did wrong, what I regret and what I don't, and what I need to learn from this."

"Good." There was quiet for a moment making Ceara think he was done but she heard his voice as he started once more. "I will admit that I also made a mistake. I shouldn't have said what I did."

"About?" she inquired wanting to be sure of what he was apologizing for.

"Resorting to childish bickering, those comments about Sindria's king," he said as if he could recalled the conversation like she could from thinking about it so much. "But mostly about the twins."

"I accept your apology."

"And I yours," he muttered before lifting the towel off of her before leaving her again. Ceara glanced over her shoulder as her hands mindlessly put her hair back in place however she could, following his broad back as he went about doing whatever he was doing. She seldom saw him so relaxed except at the study. But this was different somehow.

Turning fully around, she took a gander at what was in front of her. Plenty of books and scrolls with one in particular catching her attention. Standing up to the shelve, her hand had already reached out before she knew what she was doing and began skimming through the pages of short rhymes until a very familiar one caught her eye.

"Star light, star bright…" Ceara chuckled as she murmured the rest under her breath.

"You have no sense of privacy, do you?"

Ceara smiled at Kouen as an apology but came back to read the rhyme in her head again. "It just caught my attention. Cael use to read this to me. He said our mother read it to him. And from that, I read it to Sou and Sui when they were little, too…" Clearing her throat and breathing deeply, she looked up to him. "Why do you have this?"

"Memory's sake," he just said, taking the book and instead giving her a set of robes. "Go and change. Being soaked will only get you sick." Somewhat confused but following as he showed her somewhere she could change privately, Ceara took her time to do so.

She had forgotten about that. Her clothes hadn't even felt heavy. But as she changed into the simple white robes, she felt herself shivering and her teeth chattering a bit from having been soaked to the bone from the rain that had unexpectedly fallen on her. The clothes were a bit big; she had managed to adjust one so that it would fit her decently well despite the chest being a tad big for her. The other she couldn't change no matter how much she tried so instead she wore it over loosely, off the shoulders since it kept slipping anyway and having to push back the sleeves at times since they were longer.

Once out, Kouen didn't bother turning to her as he sat at his desk back at work apparently. What she did notice though was the extra chair that hadn't been there before she left—it actually resembled the ones she had glanced at out in the antechamber—and on the seat was the nursery rhyme book. Ceara didn't bother announcing herself as she walked over and took the book's place by Kouen's side.

Out of curiosity, although she had an inkling of suspicion, Ceara lifted her hands showing him how the robes fit her a little big. "Where did you get these from?"

"You shouldn't ask questions you don't want answers to."

 _True._

One set of clothes were female, after all, and she really didn't want to know why he had them in his room. So instead she went back to reading the small book. As she skimmed through the pages again, whispering a few rhymes that she recognized, she felt calm and at peace now that all that had happened had been sorted out. But it was with one of the two she had to apologize to.

"I shouldn't be here," she muttered aloud. "Koumei's still mad at me."

"How did you know I was here in the first place?" he asked instead, not lifting his gaze from the scrolls and map in front of him. She went on to tell him about finding Koumei in the study when she went out looking for him and how his brother had reluctantly told him about his whereabouts. "Koumei told you for a reason. He won't stay mad for long."

"Still," she drawled on, setting the book aside and picking her knees up to lay her head against them. "I'll find him tomorrow and apologize."

"You won't be able to."

"Why not?"

Kouen left aside what he was doing to briefly look at her. "Tomorrow we depart for the summit."

 _That's right._ She had forgotten about that. But the fact that Sindria had sent an ambassador already should have clued her in on that. It would take a full three days to reach that desolate island. And Balbadd would be left to the government to run while its governor was absent. Kouen would be taking everybody who served him: his brother, his household members, and some military. And from what she had heard around the palace, a certain corp that had agreed to be on their side.

"And you will be accompanying us as well."

A chill ran down her spine at hearing those words. She didn't know why but every time she heard word of that meeting, her blood would run cold and a fear would grapple at her chest. Every time, she thought it was her gut feeling but a part of her knew it wasn't. This was worse.

"I don't want to go."

This time it was Kouen who was confused about her words. "It's not a choice—"

"No, you don't understand," Ceara muttered, raising her head to meet his eyes. She really didn't want to go. "I-I have a bad feeling about going there. I don't believe anything bad will happen to you or Koumei or the others but…" The chill came over her again and she wrapped her arms around her legs, huddling closer onto herself. "I can't explain why but this feeling I have won't leave me. It's there and it makes me afraid about being there."

"We have taken precautions against everything that could happen."

"I believe you." Ceara gave him a small smile but shook her head all the same. "But I believe myself more. If I go there...something bad will happen." Chuckling nervously, she placed the book on the desk not noticing at first how her hands were shaking. "I wanted to go and see Aladdin, too, and hear his story. But I think it's better if I stay behind. If it's all right with you, though, may Seijin go in my place?"

"Seijin?"

"He'll be my eyes and ears. I want to know what Aladdin wants to say but I—" Ceara stopped briefly to focus on her hands to get them to stop shaking. "—I can't bring myself to go."

By the looks of it, Kouen didn't want to agree. But she couldn't make herself do what every part of her told her not to, no matter how much she wanted to be there to listen to Aladdin's story. After all, Murmur did say long ago that the little boy was important to all of the djinn, and to her own 'existence.' She had always been curious as to what he'd meant by that. And this had been a grand opportunity to speak with him about it. Yet, she wouldn't go. She couldn't.

Finally, Kouen let out a heavy sigh, leaning his chin against his hand as his arm rested on the armrest. "I don't see a need for such precaution but...fine. If you're that adamant about it."

Ceara couldn't keep the smile from her face. "Thanks, En."

After a couple more hours of quiet or mindless talks, she left his chambers to let him rest and returned to her own, telling her youngest household member about what had been decided.

"Me go?" he called out quite shocked about the news. "B-But why? I thought Prince Kouen would be taking you on the convoy to the summit meeting."

"I declined." And there was no more elaboration as to the why. "But you're the most perfect person I can think of to go in my place. Especially because of your gift." Seijin stammered at hearing that, his ears getting a bit colored which made Parisa chuckle. Placing her hands on his shoulders to reassure him, Ceara gave him a smile. "Be my eyes and ears in that place. Can I entrust you that, Jin."

After he got over his mild embarrassment, he returned the smile before nodding. "You can, master. I will go there in your place."

"Then I guess I'll stay here with the lady of Ériu."

"Parisa?" Seijin questioned with the same confusion that Ceara felt at hearing her say her name. Despite knowing what Seijin had told Parisa, Ceara hadn't spent long with her. She was a brilliant magician which made her wonder why she stayed by her side even after she was all better.

"You don't have to," Ceara told her. "The two weeks have passed, after all. I'm better now."

"Yeah but I'm curious," she replied with a cute grin. "Seijin trusts you. And although I haven't known either of you for long, well, to put it like Jin did, I feel like I'm supposed to be here. So I'm going to run along with that and stay for a little bit longer. Would that be a problem?"

Ceara couldn't contain the small chuckle that escaped her. She certainly didn't understand their way of thinking but would gladly accept their requests if that was what they wanted. "None with me, Parisa."

The three spent some time to discuss what would happen on the morrow: Seijin would depart with Kouen and the fleet that were headed to the summit, Parisa would remain to act as her interim retainer, and Ceara would remain as well taking care of Balbadd and it's needs even if she wasn't the one appointed to them.

That next morning Ceara, along with Parisa, accompanied Seijin to the docks for departure. Once again she felt ill, not out of health but out of the foreboding that lingered. Taking the cuff earing to keep safe for him, Ceara stepped back as Seijin went to the side of Kouen's household.

"Please take care of him," she called out to them with a small grin.

"Don't fret, general." Ri Seishuu clapped Seijin's back a little too hard as he grinned back. "He could be in no better hands."

She didn't doubt that. Several ships were being taken to the meeting. By the looks of it, Alibaba's household and companions would board a separate ship from himself as she saw him get to the ship she stood in front of alongside Kouen and Koumei.

The boy couldn't have looked more distraught. The three of them stopped before her and Parisa while the troops informed Kouen that everything was ready and set to go.

Taking a deep breath, Ceara met each with a smile before bowing. "May your voyage be safe and swift, your highnesses." Once she stood straight, Ceara came forth to have a little more sense of privacy as she addressed each one of them.

First, she turned to Alibaba. "I know this isn't the easiest decision but I hope you choose what you believe best."

After, she came to face Koumei who she could tell was still quite cross with her. All she could do to appease him for the time being was show him a genuine smile. "I'm sorry about what happened. And I hope you take care of your brother and everybody like you always do."

Lastly, her stark blue eyes met crimson tainted gold and her smile curved the slightest at one end. "Be safe."

 _Please return. All of you._

Kouen was the only one to answer her. "We will be." The three then walked past her without another glance to board the ship. Parisa stood by her as Ceara watched them leave a few minutes afterwards, the sinking feeling in her gut never leaving her.

This bad feeling, even without being on board, still gnawed at her. Her eyes glanced down at her open palm where Seijin's household vessel rested. _Was it a mistake to send him? Should I have broken the rules and given him his vessel to protect himself?_

" _He doesn't know how to use it,"_ Marbas said a bit saddened to hear her so troubled.

" _And without Murmur,"_ Beleth begun with a stern tone to his voice, _"he cannot activate it."_

They're right. And even if she had Murmur and Seijin knew how to use the household vessel, breaking the rules of that meeting wouldn't have been worth the massive war it would possibly cause. It annoyed her that having all the power she did, Ceara could still be scared of some misgiving. All this anxiety because of that...it surely meant nothing. Surely, she was just overreacting.

 _Please let that be so._

Cradling the vessel in her closed palm, she prayed out to whatever was out there to protect them. Protect them of whatever threat would come their way.

 _Please be there when I cannot be. Bring them back to me safely. All of them._

* * *

This did not bode well.

As of twelve days ago, since their arrival to the capital, there had been no communication with the ninth base of Southern Tenzan Plateau front-line. The garrisons that ran along the southwestern part of the plateau, just shy of the shores around Rakushou, fell under the Reizei Household jurisdiction and as such Sousei had done what his father and si—what the two of them had always done upon arrival to any base: check on all frontlines. So far most of the bases south of Shika had responded yet there was still no answer from the ninth base.

"Sousei?" Sighing from frustration of the issues he was dealing with, Sousei tried to calm himself as he turned to Masami who had concern etched on her expression. "Is everything all right?"

"No," he replied seamlessly. "Bases aren't responding."

"Surely there must be a reason," she assured him, walking up to the map that laid before him with bases she recognized from her days as strategists plus new ones along the southwestern parts near the Tenzen Plateau.

"And I'll find out what it is." Storming out, he came to the captains under his command that stood guard at Shika. Ordering from the resources he had, Sousei mustered a battalion large enough, maybe thirty men, to be able to deal with any problems that might be present or that could abscond if the need came to be. His orders were simple: recognisance only. Attack if the need arose but no sooner. And lastly, be sure to return and report back.

The trip there and back should have lasted three days from Shika from where the troops departed.

It was already five and no word from or sign of them had been reported back. This definitely did not bode well. And it was getting harder to think of what to do. He couldn't reach Prince Kouen and neither could he get an audience with Empress Gyokuen. The war council that resided in Rakushou only sent men like he did and received the same results. Something was not right.

"You mustn't push yourself, Sousei," Masami reminded him. The three of the siblings kept together in her room out of necessity for some privacy. Sousei paced the room incessantly while Suisei watched just as impatiently, both trying to think of what to do. "More than four battalions have been sent and none have returned. You cannot work this by yourself."

"This happened in our jurisdiction," he corrected her. "I have to think of a way."

"Sucks that we don't have the power to go there ourselves," Suisei muttered under her breath.

Masami was the first to speak at even overhearing that. "You don't need those powers. She manipulated you with the idea of strength through powers she controlled."

"Enough. Both of you." His two sisters remained quiet and averted their gazes as he continued thinking of what to do. But that train of thought quickly became mute when the alarm bells began to ring all across the palace.

Instinctively as the people began to shout outside, all three siblings ran up to the window to witness the monstrosities that began to appear amid the once blue skies, tainting it a darker hue. And from what Sousei could see, soldiers rode the beasts that emerged from the dark skies. Before any of them could do anything, however, images began flashes through his head of different people—Empress Gyokuen, Prince Hakuryuu, and of the fire that ravaged the capital almost a decade ago—before Hakuryuu's voice echoed in throughout the palace.

"I'm here to kill the traitor who greedily devoured this country, Ren Gyokuen! I will cut down anyone who will get in my way! But if there are those who want to exact vengeance with me then...raise your swords!"

"Traitor?" Suisei repeated, grabbing at her head from the pain she surely felt too.

"He's causing a revolt!?" Masami exclaimed unable to believe such thing.

And he wasn't alone—Judar, the holy priest from the organization, was with him. As the hordes of enemies began to land in the palace, from their place, Sousei could see how easily Hakuryuu's soldiers began to invade. Not wanting to remain there for another second and fearing for the safety of his sisters, Sousei took swords, passing one to each of them, before grabbing onto Masami's wrist to drag her along.

"Sousei?"

"We must get out of here." Pushing through the doors of the room, the three of them were ambushed by servants and maids, the innocent and ones unable to fight, running amok and heading for whatever exits they could find. But even with the early warning from their flashy arrival, Hakuryuu's soldiers were quickly encroaching the palace. Luckily, most of them were heading elsewhere.

"They're heading for the palace's inner sanctuary," Suisei pointed out as they headed through the side of the palace grounds.

Careful with Masami, he led the front to get them out of the palace while Suisei took the rear. They needed to protect each other no matter what came. He needed to get them out of there to safety.

Up from the rooftops of the outer grounds, Sousei stepped back, pushing Masami to Suisei, as soldiers dropped from above. They weren't just any normal soldiers, though, and that was more than clear by how manic they appeared.

Almost like—

" _It can control people's minds? Sound magic is scary."_

" _Yes,"_ he heard his sister's voice in his head remembering what she had done once while teaching him how to use sound magic with his household vessel. A harmless lecture that had turned into a fearful lesson when she opted to control a small snake with her powers, making it crawl to a pond just inches away from drowning itself. _"But the scariest one is life magic, Sou. For as much as sound can control one mind, life magic is capable of controlling numerous minds by messing with its composition and it can also reach a greater number of people much easier than sound can. And it can be much more devastating as well."_

"It's Hakuryuu's metal vessel," he muttered under his breath. As one of those crazed soldiers rushed to strike him, he took it calmly and avoided the lunge at him and struck him down instead, his arm drenched with the blood that poured from the wound. Taking his sword back, Sousei glanced back at Suisei and Masami who parried away the manic blows. Fighting them wouldn't work. They were no match for anything that was being forced to fight against its will. "Go, keep moving!"

Striking a few more down to open a path, he pushed Masami forth with Suisei leading as he kept the path clear from every side he could. But despite their low numbers, the ferocity with which they fought was relentless and it was quickly draining everything in them to fight and run. They were almost out of to the outer palace when they found themselves surrounded by more of those soldiers who blocked the one exit they were headed for.

"We can't run out of this one." Sousei brandished his sword, the blood on its sheen spilling in a straight line.

"Then we fight." Suisei held onto hers with a taut grip, taking her own stance despite the heaviness of her clothes drenched in blood.

Masami didn't reply but did take her own stance, preparing for the enemy to attack. The soldiers didn't hesitate, there was no patience or warning before they rushed towards them. Striking one after the other, Sousei couldn't help but feel the pain racking his body or the fear that ravaged his mind. Fighting his people, people more than likely controlled by magic, wasn't something he ever thought would have happen. It's the last thing he wanted to have happened. But nonetheless it did, and they were caught in the middle of a coup d'etat by their own prince.

 _It isn't right._

"Sou!"

Lost in his mind, Sousei missed the soldier that had lurched to attack him. Suisei's warning gave him enough time to react and step back, the blade slashing a straight line across his temple near his left eye and catching his left forearm as he brought his own sword up to block it too late. The momentum he lost, the enemy gained and took to his favor as he retracted his elbow to plunge the sword directly into his right shoulder. The pain hitting him and breaking the hold he had on his sword, Sousei fell back only to hear a loud cry before Masami blocked his view.

Sword brandished, she rushed forward and, with their statures being so disparate between her and the soldier, Masami managed to stab the blade through his neck, the blood spraying out as she pulled it out and the body falling before her. Her breathing heavy, Sousei watched in a hue of half-red as Masami came back to him, grabbing to secure him. Reaching his sword again with his left hand, Sousei couldn't manage the blade well with how blurry his vision was getting even with Masami trying to guide his strikes. Suisei was parrying well but the few blows that she kept receiving—the slashes all over her body tarnishing her—were piling up, making her stagger from the blood she was constantly losing. Backing up against Masami and him, Sousei felt her tight grip on his injured hand and winced.

The soldiers were fast approaching. They showed no remorse and no restraint. None of them could fight for any longer. They were going to be killed.

Shutting his eyes and grasping onto Suisei's hand as tightly as he could while leaning against Masami, he gave a small prayer that he never thought he would give.

 _I'm sorry, Haku-nee. I couldn't protect them. I love you. I love all of you._

" _ **Rakah!"**_

Hearing Masami's voice pierce through the barbaric battle cries and screams of anguish, Sousei couldn't comprehend at first why or even what she had called out at the top of her lungs. Just as the words left her, though, a cyclone burst all around them, cocooning them and pushing every soldier back, enemy or ally. Masami held tightly onto them as the cyclone danced, covering their faces as the eye expanded until it left a large enough area for them. None could trespass the destructive winds, not even the ravaging soldiers that kept trying and trying only to be ripped into shreds.

"Well, well, well. Who here calls me?"

A voice lilting with every word made Sousei lift his head and catch the red-marred image of a young man that appeared before them. The blond man stood without a care in the eye of the cyclone, his plait swivelling every which way but his amethyst eyes never wavering and garnering the sight of them. But what unnerved him most was the large grin that he had splitting his face from ear to ear and making his eyes shine brighter.

"Help us!" Masami cried out still holding tightly to either of them. Sousei brought his face up and tried meeting the man's eyes but he only paid attention to Masami when she spoke.

"Help?" He scoffed and stood, his back straighter as he leaned back. "Now why would I do that?"

"Y-You helped me before," she shouted over the winds that thrashed around them yet never really touching them. "The poison—"

"Was not a gift." His correction made Masami tense up and Sousei had to force himself to pay attention to the man before him. "I gave you that poison in good faith, believing you would actually be capable of killing her. Now, I find out she's alive and well?" He clicked his tongue softly, as if chastising her, while shaking his head. "You did a poor job, Masami. And now you expect me to give again knowing your precedents of failure?" The grin from before appeared on his lips as he flicked his fingers and the cyclone around them began to quickly lose speed. "Sorry, darling. I'm a broker—businessman through and through. And as such I don't give anything for free. If you want my services, then tell me what you are willing to give in exchange."

Sousei couldn't help the gut wrenching feeling that twisted his insides at hearing him say that. He was playing fast and loose with her. But Masami spoke before he could even voice his fear and doubt about the man, making his heart race at the words she spoke.

"I'll do anything!" she shouted, tears running down her face as the cyclone was just about letting up. "So please, just save us—save them!"

A malicious glint darkened those amethyst eyes a second before he reached his hand down, wanting hers to shake. "That's what I love to hear." Sousei could do nothing to stop her as she reached her own hand out and grasped his tightly. Out of the blue, three strange rings of dark light hovered around their joined hands before shrinking against their hands and arms. Despite the light disappearing, the mark remained, letters or runes that he didn't recognize staining his sister's hand and arm.

Raising his other hand above his head, bright yellow light rings appeared above them, three of a kind and becoming smaller as they stacked skyward to surround them. A wicked grin on his face, the man brought his arm down onto the ground and a split second after lightning began striking down and killing off every soldier that came remotely close to them. The noise mingled with screams from his sisters and it deafened him as it continued on. But what seemed to last forever finally ended as the lightning struck no more.

Lifting his head, Sousei met with a gruesome scene: bodies upon bodies of soldiers—he didn't know whether friend or foe—dead and scorched by the ferocious bright purple lightning that had struck everywhere except where they were. They were unrecognizable and the fact that he had attacked so indiscriminately and carelessly didn't take away from the fact that whatever magic he had used had been powerful enough to deal with how many soldiers had littered those grounds.

"I've done my part." Sousei met the man's eyes briefly, the wide grin still on his lips, before he turned back to Masami. "Seeing as I have a summit to attend to, I'll come for my payment on a later time. For now—" He chuckled just a few seconds before his body began to become transparent, "—enjoy Emperor Hakuryuu's reign."

His barely visibly silhouette refracted, breaking into diagonal crystals before vanishing completely. Sousei had no time to question Masami because not a second later did the inner sanctuary explode sending a cloud of black smoke up to litter the sky.

"The palace…" Suisei mumbled, holding tightly onto both his hand and her sword but both shaking all the same. "The empress. What has Hakuryuu done?"

"It doesn't matter." Sousei flinched as Masami moved from around them, his injured arm pulsating in pain and his vision blurrying by the second. "We'll get ahead of what's to come and survive." Despite her brave statement, though, Sousei felt the grip on his side tighten and tremble. And that left one thing very clear to him.

His sister was petrified. What he couldn't decipher was whether it was because of the revolt that had just happened at their capital or because of the terrifyingly powerful man that she had just brokered with.

* * *

Alma Toran. King Solomon. Queen Sheba. Al-thamen. And the young magician born from that tragedy, Aladdin.

So much information had just been thrown their way and Seijin made sure to never once look away. No matter how gruesome or grievous the tale had become, Seijin wanted to make sure that he would be able to recount it in its every detail to his master.

And he left his mind open to listen to the young magi give his ultimatum: would they save the world or destroy it?

 _It's an easy choice._ Despite the animosity, if they refused a cease-fire, the three warring nations would have no world to fight for if Al-thamen was not dealt with first.

But it appeared they all had a different idea. In spite of the clear common enemy they faced, Seijin could see through King Sinbad's conniving methods. His master had been right to warn him about the king of Sindria. From the few words he spat, even when they sounded so logical to his mind, wanting Kou to separate from the organization before forming any kind of alliance with them was just an excuse to weaken them as the nation they were.

Prince Kouen obviously didn't fall for the ruse. But it put both ends into a debate that wouldn't have a clear-cut answer, Seijin was certain of that much.

And there wasn't. In the end, although he absconded from reaching an agreement or alliance, Prince Kouen told Aladdin that he wasn't going to join with the 'antics and fanatics' of that woman. Arba, Seijin thought immediately, but felt like Kouen was referring to someone else, someone that according to him had already taken hold of the Kou Empire.

But in his mind, Seijin couldn't think of this woman that he spoke of. At least no one that he heard or was aware of.

"Impure army?" All heads perked at hearing the voice that called out over everything. "That sucks. Don't put me together with that lot."

From a riveting power above them, the magi of their empire appeared. Everybody was wary of him and Seijin could tell why. Somehow the priest seemed different. Judar kept talking and talking, calling the ceasefire boring, and addressing Prince Kouen and pointing out that obviously Arba was Ren Gyokuen.

 _The empress?!_

"Yep," Judar said nonchalantly, shrugging his shoulders. "But that hag doesn't exist anywhere anymore."

Seijin didn't understand what he meant, at least not until their vanguard came and told his highness the news: the empress had been murdered by Prince Hakuryuu. And somehow Judar had helped Hakuryuu to accomplish that.

Judar flew skyward, a third eye appearing on his forehead while he took his dark staff in hand. "Take it. This is just a way for me to greet you all." All around the sky, clouds began to take shape as dark lightning formed dangerously close to them. Judar didn't want to end the world's problems by talking, he wanted war. "This is my answer as a magi!" His thumb crossed his throat as the lightning struck down; with his work done, the magi left using space and time magic that Seijin had falsely thought possible by only a handful of people. Seijin could do nothing but cower back as it came closer to them. But before it even reached the ruins and at the same time the protective borgs came forth for the island, a grand seal appeared above them, one that shone a bright yellow and seemed to absorb the dark lightning that had meant to strike directly at them. The rest, though, dispersed all around the island, creating a chasm of unfathomable size.

"Whew! That was a close one." A lilting voice called over them right in the middle of the eight-pointed seal, two warring lightning bolts converging to a diamond center, and hovered down to the floor before them. A grin split his face and was the only thing visible as he covered his face with a cowl but Seijin could still see the long gold plait that swayed as he stepped closer to the people around them. "Had the magic he casted not been in concord with my original gift, I don't think I'd have taken that as I did."

"Who—"

"You came," Aladdin spoke up with a shocked tone to his voice.

The blond man turned down to look at the magi, the grin never going away. "Came a bit late—some business to attend to—but I heard the gist of what you wanted to tell."

"You know this man, Aladdin?" Alibaba asked his friend, both him and the Fanalis girl stepping forth to flank either side of him.

"I met him briefly while I studied in Magnostadt," the young magi told them. "His name is—"

"Rakah." The man bowed and came back up, pulling his cowl back and showing striking amethyst eyes. "Pleased to make your acquaintance. But truth be told, I came out of curiosity, not obligation."

"You came all the same, Mister," Aladdin said, his voice sterner than before. "So you either wanted to know or you came for something else. And if you tell me otherwise, I know you're lying because you don't care about this world."

"Astute little boy!" he called out, leaning back with his hands on his hips. "But we've had this talk before, right? I don't care and I won't deny you the truth; I only came here to hear what you had to say and see if someone I know came."

He eyed the crowd before him, his cold amethyst gaze scanning everything and everybody around, before they settled at the Kou Empire and to Seijin in particular. His grin fell a bit before he chuckled and shook his head.

"But the coward didn't come."

"Who are you talking about?" the magi from Reim called out confused.

"No one of importance to Reim or Sindria," he confessed and immediately caught the attention of Seijin and everybody else in Kou's side.

"Is she one of them too?" Aladdin asked him.

"How are you sure we're talking about the same person?" Rakah retorted back.

"Because I've met her." Seijin couldn't help but feel ill at this whole pronoun game they were playing, both aware of whom they were speaking of but leaving everybody else in the dark. "Briefly but I could tell."

"A magi's power, huh," Rakah scoffed, tilting his head to the side as he eyed the shorter magician. "No. It's just the fact that you're from Alma Toran that you can tell." Standing back, he motioned his head to the rest of the countries present. "Don't be bothered, kings and magi, I didn't come to disrupt your precious peace or lack thereof. If anything I come with a similar goal as you all: to destroy the darkness and abnormalities that lurk in this world."

"Darkness and abnormalities?" King Sinbad repeated.

Something akin to a glare passed over Rakah's eyes before it changed back to the nonchalance that he had held so far. "Exactly. This isn't something little Aladdin could've shown you—it's not a story for him to tell, after all—but he will tell you that what I speak of is the truth." He took a few steps back before stretching his arms out to either side of him. At doing so, three small eight-pointed seals appeared around him, each of a different color and with different symbols in their centers. One held a royal blue hue with the insignia of a rolling wave centered; another was of a solid black with a circle and dot in the center; the third was of a white color and a swirl of wind as its sigil.

The sight of that one gave Seijin a chill down his spine. Grinning, Rakah gave him a brief smile before turning to the rest of the crowd at large. "The world is plagued with abnormalities that none of you can imagine, much less fight against; ones that Al-thamen did not cause but will exploit all the same. They arise from powers stolen and which I have fought hard to retrieve. So far I have obtained three—" Reaching his left arm out, Rakah pushed back his sleeves to show his forearm as another sigil showed itself. This one was the same insignia from before, a bright yellow with two centered lightnings forming the diamonded center that circled around his arm. "Including the powers given to me inherently, that makes four in total. Only three remain, one of which I have located."

Tilting his head to the side, he glanced Seijin's way with a chuckle before making the insignias disappear and facing the young magi. "And I will obtain the one that lies here in this world as well."

"Are you going to kill her then?" Aladdin inquired.

"I'd rather not. She's a sensible woman, though, so I'm hoping she will resign them to me. But if she's unwilling to cooperate, I will see myself forced to," Rakah told him with a nod. "You understand this is for the good of everybody, even for her."

"Killing someone for their own good?" Alibaba called out unable to understand what he meant. "That's ridiculous."

"Bark all you want, Saluja." Rakah walked past them and towards the rest of the crowd. "But you know nothing of what we have suffered because of what was done. We had no choice in the matter and now we pay. Well, I say no more!"

Anxiously expecting it after so many sidelong glances, Rakah's eyes met Seijin's for the briefest second before his image refracted and he appeared right in front of him. Seijin stepped back out, startled, and could only stare at the striking eyes that pierced through him as some kind of innate fear shook in him.

He didn't know where it came from or why he felt it so deep in his bones, but every part of him screamed to _run_.

But he couldn't. Seijin just froze as Rakah stared him down. Leaning over, the blond spoke in a quiet whisper against his ear. "Glad to see you have a plentiful life, Kijani. But you and Parisa should better separate from Speirr. Unlike you two, she's cursed still, bound like I am, and misfortune will follow her like it did you once and will affect you both." Pulling back, he smiled down at Seijin before patting his head. "I won't harm you. I have no need to." Rakah let out a low chuckle in his throat, "So stop shaking like a scared rabbit."

Seijin heard something from his side but by the time Chu'uun and Ri Seishuu got to him, Rakah's body refracted quicker than before and returned to the place he'd originally been. It was like he never even moved. Had he really stood before him? He had to; Seijin wouldn't have heard him so clearly if he hadn't been.

"Stop this, Mister Rakah." Rakah turned to Aladdin who stood with his staff held by him and with the Fanalis girl and Alibaba there as well. "What you want does not justify her death or anybody else's."

"Even when she'll be better off if I do?" Rakah asked him but immediately shook his head as the two remaining magi joined behind Aladdin. "Forget it. I see there's still no use negotiating this with you." His body began to become transparent then, losing color part by part. "But it matters not. Things will be how they should with or without your blessing; they always do."

Before he lost all color, Rakah glanced over his shoulder and smirked at Kouen and Koumei. "Don't get too attached, boys."

His silhouette refracted a second before he vanished completely. Turmoiled quickly ensued thereafter as the Kou Empire hurried to board their ships to leave. Ri Seishuu and Chu'uun tried to calm Seijin down from what had happened but he was shaken beyond belief. So much had happened—his heart still felt like it would pop out of his chest—but he couldn't think for a second as many things rushed through his mind.

 _Kijani. Why did he...call me that? And why did it sound so familiar?_

But more importantly than that, Rakah's brazen approach had more than confirmed his fears about just who he and Aladdin had been speaking about. As startled as he was, it took Aladdin a couple of times to get his attention.

The young magi appeared concerned with pursed lips as he stood before him, his closest companions right behind him. "I'm sorry. I didn't consider that any of you would be here."

"I-I don't know you" was all Seijin could tell him as shaken as he still was.

"I know." Aladdin took a large breath before giving him a small smile. "But I know what Mister Rakah talked about and…" The young magi rubbed at the back of his head. "I can't really talk about it here. It really has nothing to do with Al-thamen's threat as it stands now but I feel that she should know."

"Please," Seijin muttered going over and bending down to meet his eyes. "Tell me, what does he want with my master?"

"Nothing good," Aladdin assured him. "But he will not harm her. At least, I don't think so. Not unless she gives him a reason to. So just tell her that she shouldn't listen to Mister Rakah."

Seijin knew his master better than that though. If the magi had a reason to think she would and she actually did, then there was little Seijin could do to convince her. "What if she doesn't listen?"

Aladdin pursed her lips and hung his head. "Then stop her however you can. What he wants—" The young magi's gaze fell askance towards the king of Sindria for a fraction of a second, but that was all Seijin needed to see it "—one person shouldn't be given so much power. So take care of her."

"I will."

"Seijin!" Turning at being called, Seijin glanced over his shoulder to Prince Kouen and Prince Koumei who had been too busy giving orders to get their fleets to leave as soon as possible that they had missed his and Aladdin's exchange. He gave the magi a small bow and thanks before heading back to the ships.

Everything was in chaos as information poured in about Rakushou from Balbadd as it came. The garrisons that had escaped from the capitol told many stories but they mostly concurred with each other: Prince Hakuryuu had been the one to murder Empress Gyokuen with the aid of the priest, Judar.

But it was some other news that shock him, ones that had been buried amongst the chaos of the revolt and ones that he had read through in a matter of minutes. The refugees that had arrived from Rakushou had been all account for at Balbadd; names and statuses had all been recorded.

And among none of them did the names of the Reizei family appear.

* * *

Rakah took a deep breath as another part of him returned to his temporary source, the ache from the distortion using borrowed Light magic taking its toll on his conscious. With his body elsewhere in his original world, Rakah knew that without little sparrow's original gift, he would have never gotten the ability to distort like he could; were it not for his own powers and those he'd retrieved, though, he knew that distortion from borrowed magic would only allow him to distort through that same world.

Her Light magic was versatile. But where raw power was concerned, he had the upper hand. That's what brought him so much confidence about returning to little sparrow's world when he had no more magic left to leave. Where she to refuse, he would easily make her submit.

A groan caught his attention and brought him back to the present where the lithe woman he knew entered the tiny cottage she called home. It was midday and the sun shone clearly through her opened windows, lighting her auburn hair ablaze into a fiery mane with golden feathers tinted crimson hanging low and out from behind her right ear.

Rakah could only scoff at the warm welcome he seemed to be getting everywhere he went. "Good to see you too, Noé."

"Spare me the civility." Her voice, like his, had a lilt to it but with a much thicker accent. "I'm not in the mood for you right now." Throwing the large satchel she'd been carrying over her shoulder to the side and letting it hit against the wall, Noé reached out one hand while the other rested on her hips. "Hand it over."

Not wanting to waste either of their time, Rakah did as she so politely asked and pulled the necklace over his head before laying it on the palm of her hand. Without even saying a thing, a bright orange seal marked the right side of her face, lighting the dark olive tone of her skin and making her emerald eyes shine ever brighter.

Inside the eight-pointed seal, a burst of lines came out from the center like rays of sunshine. The almost empty sphere filled in a matter of seconds before it shone bright with Light magic. Haphazardly, she tossed the necklace back but Rakah found no trouble catching it.

 _Someone's quite bitter today._

"Troubles in paradise?" he asked.

"Troubles in yours?" she asked, a half grin hiding what he knew to be the truth of what had her in such sour mood. "You've been coming back more often that I'd like seeing you. What's making you distort from place to place so damn much?"

"Business," he merely offered.

"Right," she muttered under her breath. "Friendly advice: don't let your body be without a conscious for too long. It'll do away without your rukh in it and if somebody finds it while you're out of it—"

"—I'll get possessed. I know. I've only been told this a couple hundred of times."

His cockiness seemed to amuse her as she grinned. "So what's the update? You finally convince her?"

"Not yet."

"Hurry up then," she demanded. The order irritated him since she couldn't understand that one couldn't just speed up such delicate process. "I'm damn tired of living in this fucked up world. This ain't no different from that shitty hell-hole underground or the damn tower. People hate and fight all the same. Idiotic bastards."

"You can't hurry this, Noé," he reminded her. "I'd rather not pressure her. After all, I can't take her seal unless—"

"Unless she activates it first," Noé finished for him going over to lay in her hammock, swaying back and forth with the one long leg she let rest on the outside. "Otherwise it'll just skip forward to whomever's next. I know, I know. It's just, _ugh,_ so frustrating to wait on your ass. I'm sick of the world being so fucking disgusting."

"Then stay here." Even with his eyes closed, Rakah could feel the daggers that Noé glared his way. "Ah right," he jeered, "being cooped up isn't your thing, is it?"

"Just go fuck off and get her seal already so you can take mine." With that said, she placed her arms over her face, practically ending the conversation on her side.

Always the dramatic little sparrow.

"Don't worry. It shouldn't be long now," he assured her while placing the necklace back over his head. "I just brokered a little bargain that will surely get her to react like I want her to. So if you'll excuse me..." His silhouette began to quickly lose color as it became transparent. "I've got to instruct myself a poisonous snake on how to disclose some twisted truths to the world." Just as he said that, the light around him refracted and he distorted out, leaving no trace.

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _Oh look, it hasn't been a month but I uploaded xD Wrote this in maybe three days because of how inspired I've been._

 _Now bear with me, here, because I know there's a bunch of information here that may not necessarily pertain to the story as a whole but it will. I'm broadening the scope to fit in better with what's going to happen later (it's broader from when it started) but I promise it won't go further than this. At least I don't plan it to go any further than this in Silent Lamb. But that's for another time._

 _There's a bunch of things that happened here certainly. Especially with Rakah and his character because I could tell that some of you thought he would be helping Ceara :) But just to put things clear, he isn't a completely chaotic character, he has purpose although he does love to cause "mischief." There's also some deeper (although not that deep) delving into Seijin and Parisa's character. It's barely scratching the surface really. No worries, though, next chapter for sure, I'll focus more on Ceara and Silent Lamb's plot and not as much on this whole metaverse thing I'm working on (-w- ) Pinky promise._

 _Let's welcome the awesome people that Favorited and Followed, joining the little family of readers:_

 ** _\- NeverStory  
_ _\- Crazywordsmith_**

 _It's only been a couple of days but hope you enjoy this! If I'm not wrong with how I'm planning on delivering this (which I'm almost 99.9% certain) we'll be having a pretty intense fight next chapter :3 It'll be a 2v2 but who against who will be the question I'll leave you with x) So like always hoped you enjoyed and stay tuned for the next chapter! :D_


	14. Claws as Long and Sharp as Yours

_**Chapter Fourteen:**_

Claws as Long and Sharp as Yours

* * *

Hakuryuu's revolt, Judar's frightening new powers, and their killing Ren Gyokuen could only result in one thing: war.

And in the midst of all of it were Sousei and Suisei unable to escape the capital.

Ceara was beside herself with anxiety and fear. There had been no word from them or concerning them from any of the refugees that she'd talked to as they arrived from the capital. The chaos that had ensued also made it impossible to smuggle information in or out. Even Shika remained at a standstill with none of her sources answering her calls. Her panic grew exponentially everyday and soon she could no longer sleep nor eat properly, preferring to spend her time working with the military or intelligence in order to rescue those who still were escaping from the eastern parts of their country.

It kept her informed and involved, something that Kouen was refraining vehemently from doing. Ever since the whole convoy returned from the summit meeting, he had refused to talk to her. In his place, Seijin had told her everything in detail about what had happened; he told her all about Alma Toran and how their world came to be and also about Rakah. But whatever threats or lack thereof he'd given, she didn't care for. Whatever that man could do could not be as bad as the fear that clawed at her insides every second and intoxicated her every breath at the thought of Sousei and Suisei trapped in the capitol where Hakuryuu now reigned.

The sweetest boy she'd known now a man that found no qualm in killing his people or destroying his own country.

And with the crisis their country was currently facing, Ceara knew that there were more important matters to attend to than what they would surely consider her whims. As things stood, though, she desperately needed help. Even after eight days of nonstop work to figure out a way—because surely there must be someway to reach them—she was starting to run out of options and, little by little, out of hope. She couldn't handle this alone.

Not this.

And like the past eight days, for the one hour she had to eat or rest during the day, she would go search for Kouen to talk; to see if they could figure something out to get to them. And as she stood outside the meeting room, its entrance blocked by guards that refused to let her in, she continued to fume and let her anxiety drive her back and forth in front of the door. Thankfully she was alone since Seijin and Parisa were out working as well, helping however they could with the situation they had at hand. But that didn't mean that she didn't have those that still nagged at her to stop.

" _My king, please,"_ Beleth pled. _"You must rest. You will kill yourself from exhaustion at the rate you're going."_

"Not knowing will kill me first, Beleth," she replied not caring that the guards overheard her talking to herself.

" _You have to sleep,"_ Marbas reminded her, annoying her that much more.

"No, I have to find them!" she hissed, effectively shushing them both. Thundering footsteps got her attention and made Ceara turn to her side to find Kouen's household members rushing towards the room. Despite the opportunity she saw, she couldn't keep up with them to sneak into the room. The guards kept her at bay outside but Ceara knew that whatever they had to say was important. Instead she chose to augment her hearing using Beleth to clearly listen to whatever his household would say.

 _An imperial edict...from Hakuryuu?_

And it held weight. Hakuryuu vowed to strike down Kouen, 'the traitor.' And what was worse, he had declared that anybody who opposed him would be executed. Ceara shook to her core at hearing that.

Sousei and Suisei were smart enough to not go against it. Even if they didn't agree with it, they would follow Hakuryuu's orders to stay alive. But even then…

 _I can't tell if Hakuryuu will trust their word._

He knew them. He knew where their alliances fell and what the Reizei were known for. They took care of their own first and foremost. And if Hakuryuu got the slightest hint of betrayal from them... Her legs almost gave way underneath her at thinking the worst outcome.

Ceara had been so lost in her cynicism that she hadn't noticed either Seijin or Parisa calling out to her after having found her frozen in place. But even their voices drowned as the doors of the room were pushed opened and the people inside began to file out. Seeing his aloof expression hiding what she could tell was distraught after eight days finally broke through her and made her act out on her distress. Stepping out before him, Ceara didn't allow for him to move a step further as she placed herself firmly between him and his way.

"En, I-I can't find them. There's been no word," she told him, feeling the emotions that had been piling up in her for the past week finally coming out making her stutter.

"Them?" she overheard one of the household members say.

Kouha answered them, "Sou and Sui."

Just hearing their names broke her apart. After a week of doing nothing but worry and work to find them during every hour of every day, she had left herself no time to deal with how she was dealing with it. The simple mention that Kouha made got let those emotions loose as her tears began to fall. Reaching out, Ceara could only hold onto his arms and lean her head against his chest as she cried.

"I'm scared for them, En," she whispered between sobs. "I-I don't know what H-Hakuryuu—I can't let this happen again. Please, y-you've got to help me bring them home. I-It's not safe for them there."

The feeling of his hands on her shoulders was familiar and even a tiny bit calming but as he pulled her back to meet her eye-to-eye, his words were everything but. "I know it isn't but there is no time."

"N-No time…?" she repeated baffled. Ceara tried to undo his hold on her but when she couldn't she resorted to raising her voice instead. "How can there be no time? I can't do nothing and let them die there!"

"They won't."

"You can't promise me that!" she yelled, trying desperately to undo the grip on her shoulders but the energy from the sudden anger that came had already left her. In the end, despite how much she hated it, she couldn't do much other than beg. "Please...don't do this. Help me."

Even through the tears that still came and stung her eyes, Ceara could see Kouen's unwillingness in his crimson gaze. The simply glance told her what she didn't hear, what he didn't dare say.

" _There is no point in searching for two civilians amidst a war."_

Ceara knew that what she was asking for was near impossible to do. But she had trusted that him, out of anybody, would be able to do the impossible. He'd done so before. But now all he gave to her in response was silence. That was enough to crush whatever hope she had kept alive thinking he could help her.

"Seijin. Parisa," he called, his voice somewhat lower than normal.

"Yes."

"Take her back to her room. Get her to rest. And don't let her leave for the remainder of the day."

"Of course," Seijin replied before taking her from Kouen. In spite of feeling their hands touching her body, Ceara couldn't fathom that it was her they were hauling away. She was so dissociated by that point that she hadn't even noticed how fast they got her back to her quarters. It was like she wasn't in her own body anymore. She couldn't even tell when or what Parisa got her to drink.

It tasted bitter.

But even whatever medicine she'd given her couldn't undo the panic that didn't let her rest peacefully. Her mind flooded with ideas, whatever she could think of to help. But her mind was muddied from the medicine and whatever she thought of left quickly and without a trace.

As much in chaos as the country was now, Ceara couldn't fathom it being in anymore pandemonium than her mind. But as much as she tried fighting it, it ended coming over her and settling her mind into a half-awake, half-asleep state. It felt odd and disgusting, like being submerged in thick water that made her breathing and heart beat slow to a painful pace.

It felt like days had passed when she could finally breathe on her own accord. It'd only been hours but enough to let the day waste away into the late evening. Frustrated about the lost time, Ceara snatched the pillow from beneath her and threw it across the room as she sat back against the headboard of her bed, curling into herself as she wept.

So much hope placed onto him for nothing. After days of nonstop work, Ceara had hoped that if all of it amounted to nothing, then she could trust Kouen to have an answer. Just like he always seemed to have. But that felt wrong somehow.

 _When did I place so much trust in him?_

It wasn't hard to find the answer to that question. The more she thought about it, the more excuses she came up with. The idea of the companion, the scrupulous treacher, and the passionate man she had found stood out the most. Without knowing, he had become an important pillar to her almost as strong as the twins were. Letting herself get to that point had been a mistake.

Kouen had an obligation to his people and country first and foremost. She was neither as Ceara of Eriu. And as such, despite how bitter the thought made her, she shouldn't expect his help anymore. Not in this time of crisis.

 _I'm on my own on this._

Furiously, she wiped at the tears that stung at the corners of her eyes and took a deep breath to calm herself and to think straight about what to do now. The logical part of her pleaded her to rest seeing as it was already late to do anything today. The other part of her that drove her brain to that edge told her to work—there must have been something she missed. Because of the sleep she got from Parisa's medicine, the latter won the debate. But staying in her room wouldn't help. Changing quickly, she snuck out of both her room and the palace that early morning, thinking that perhaps some of the officials from the capital had some way to contact the it.

Balbadd at those early hours of the morning, though, was rather quiet. Only the merchants, dock loaders, and the ship's crew were out at those hours. And by the time dawn had colored the sky above the city, Ceara had talked to everybody she could think of that could hold any sort of information. All for naught. Anybody with access was either lying or was scared about whatever they had seen. Even telling them who she was and why she was asking didn't help her get any answers. But a part of her understood that they were scared about what the imperial family wouldn't tell them, what they refused to admit to their people. Even with Hakuryuu's imperial edict having been kept under hold from the public, she knew that gossip had gone around about it. People were aware and that put fear in their minds.

And she couldn't deny that she wasn't part of that fearful crowd. Many of their loved ones were in Rakushou and they were in the same boat as she was, unable to contact their families or loved ones. And before she realized it, they began to plead her for help. All at once with that, she saw herself in them again, asking for help that they knew or felt she wouldn't be capable of giving them.

 _Did I know he would deny me?_

She thought so. At least somewhere deep inside, Ceara had known Kouen wouldn't help. That thought alone solidified her mentality that, at least where this was concerned, she was truly on her own.

The last place she went to search for any kind of information was the orphan house simply because she thought it the less likely to hold anything at all. By the time she arrived, the morning was well on it's way and the streets were full with busy people going about with their lives, some hiding behind fake smiles and others simply oblivious to the threats.

"Lady Reizei!" The current matron of the house, a young widow and mother of one of the kids in the house, called out at seeing her coming towards the doorstep she was currently cleaning.

"Hello." Ceara could only give a tight-lipped smile as she came closer and entered at being invited. Some of the children that she had seen on her last visit almost two weeks ago left their toys to run to their matron and her to give some cheerful hellos that somehow managed to get her to smile a little. "How is everything here?"

"All right considering how understaffed we are," she replied frankly. A small boy trotted over to her and got her to pat his head before he went running off. The two of them had the same pretty eyes.

"How's your son?"

"Growing healthy and educated." A smile came to her lips as she turned to Ceara. "We have you to thank for that."

"That's not true," Ceara retorted with a chuckle as her nose scrunched. "We all work hard to make this happen. It's because of you and those who work here that your son is doing so well. You've worked hard."

"And this would have never happened had you not created it in the first place." Another of the caretakers came over and called for the kids as their playtime ended. They groaned in unison but said their goodbyes before trotting away further into the building. "Here, we're safe, my lady. And that's something we have you and their highnesses to thank."

Being reminded of that delusion of safety, Ceara asked her if she had by any chance gotten into contact with anybody from Rakushou or if there had been any word from the refugees she or others were housing. Expectantly, the young woman shook her head. "I'm afraid not, my lady. We have received refugees but none have said anything they haven't told his excellency or the military."

"I see." Of course there wouldn't be. At least she couldn't say she didn't try everything. Giving her a meek smile, Ceara bowed before thanking her for her work like she did every time she had come around to visit them. "I hope you and your son keep doing well."

"Thank you, my lady. I hope you and your family are well, too."

 _Me too._ Keeping that comment to herself, Ceara excused herself before going back outside to the boisterous crowd. That struck her as odd, though, especially the volume. The morning had been loud but not this loud. Ceara pulled the hood of her cloak over her head to keep the sun rays away from her eyes as she entered the crowd to see what was getting them so rowdy this early in the morning.

"Is this—"

"It's a memorandum from Rakushou!"

 _What?!_ Heart beat racing, Ceara pushed through to make her way until she came to be a few heads behind where the large parchment had been hung. But even from that close, she couldn't read it very well.

"B-But is it true?"

"It has to be! Look who wrote it."

"But then that woman—"

An abrupt noise from above got all of their attention before, from one of the rooftops, somebody haphazardly tossed out stacks of loose parchment into the air and let them spread through the crowd. Ceara got lucky to catch one with a slight jump and unwrinkled it as more shocked voices started to raise all around her.

And just from reading the first line of the paper she understood why and felt even sicker than she had ever thought possible.

 _No. This can't be._

But it was.

At that instant, Ceara couldn't keep from running away from the crowd, letting the parchment fall from her hands, to make her way back to the palace.

* * *

 _This is beyond idiotic._

They shouldn't be here. They shouldn't have given up. They should have fought.

And yet he still heard Masami's quiet sobs the night after the revolt happened. _"We can't win. What matters now is that we're alive and to stay that way."_

Didn't feel like it. Sousei reached up with his right hand to his brow where bandages covered over his left eye and then to his arm where a sling was placed to keep him from injuring it any further. Despite how much he told them, neither Suisei nor Masami believed that he felt better. But after eight days, Sousei was sure that his wounds were more than healed and properly scarred but humored them by wearing the sling and patching the cut on his brow.

The recovery had been under much stress, however, seeing as Hakuryuu had taken over Rakushou with a frightening speed. It was something hard for him to understand since he knew for a fact that the majority of Kou, a staggering 80% at that, were more inclined to follow his highness, Prince Kouen. But Sousei doubted that he could do the same seeing as they were under house arrest by the emperor's orders. Whatever he had done to his troops, he didn't seem intended to do to them for whatever reason. They had allied themselves with him to keep their heads for the time being but he doubted it was their alliance that stopped him. Sousei was sure that the young emperor knew their exact intentions. Thankfully, Hakuryuu allowed them to live but ordered their current imprisonment until he decided what to do with them.

And for eight days they had followed that order...until Masami broke it a few hours ago.

"Are you in pain?"

Sousei gave his older twin an assuring smile, one both knew he didn't mean. "No, Sui. I've told you before, I'm fine now."

Suisei nodded solemnly and scooted closer to him as they sat on the bed the three of them now shared in what used to be Masami's old quarters. Despite his clemency, Hakuryuu didn't appear to have any trust in them to give them each a room. Hospitality aside, however, Sousei couldn't complain. He'd spent most of his life sharing with Suisei and Masami had left them the bed to sleep in the antechamber instead.

"Do you think he'll kill her?"

There was no lie he could tell her that would calm the anxiousness in either of them. So he didn't. "I don't know."

Certainly Masami had done something neither of them expected her to do simply because there was no need for the world to know. Sousei didn't know how but Masami had found the time in the past eight days to write a memorandum, one that she somehow managed to spread not just within the Kou Empire in the east but also towards the western plains, including Balbadd.

And in it Masami had written what she had told them the night before they left Balbadd about how Ceara of Eriu had spent over a decade posing as their sister, gaining favor to exact her revenge against the empire that stole everything from her.

 _A lie._

But if he couldn't prove what he knew to his own twin, there was no way he could disprove what a whole mass of people would think.

Even before Masami ever told them, Sousei had had some kind of inkling. Despite being so young, he had been a bright boy, one that paid attention well to everything around him. From his young age, he'd picked up on certains nuances about his family that distinguished them from how they acted and who they really were. The one of their father's foul moods that made him harass their mother or of their mother's drunken fits to cope with the abuse or even of Masami's rebellious tendencies that got her to sneak out late at night. All of these uncharacteristic things about his family—things about them that no one else in the world saw—were things he caught onto and had engraved into his memory.

And when young he'd caught onto his sister Kohaku's fixation with the world. He recalled her talking nonstop about what she would do once she was old enough to travel: the places she would go, the people she would meet, the things she would do. A fixation that had completely disappeared after the fire to their estate. Instead, after that tragedy, she spoke with a much quieter voice, saying that she wanted to go with them to the seaside.

Overnight she had changed from an overtly cheery girl to a much more quietly passionate one. From that point on and for the years that followed, Sousei had never felt things to be quite the same. At the time he had blamed it on the fire but his unease never settled and always lingered at the back of his mind. It wasn't until after he obtained Beleth's household vessel that he found out why. The spirit of the household that had bonded with his sword only ever spoke to him twice in his life: once when he came to nested on his sword and then a few months after when he had been struggling to achieve any real progress with mastering its powers.

It told him that Beleth had chosen him in order to have him before another took him. It told him that Sousei had began showing signs of a splendid household member but for two metal vessels simultaneously. It was when it refused to explain further that Sousei felt compelled to search the meaning of what he'd said. At that point in time, no other but his sister had a djinn anywhere near Shika and she had only just captured Beleth.

There was no other djinn. Or so he'd thought.

It had been one night after the attack that had left her throat disfigured and voiceless—a night that up to this day he didn't know whether to call lucky or unfortunate—that he had been training with Sakhiba Shafarat out in the woods when he heard her weeping and found her talking to something.

It was the small specter of a young girl, one he recognized well as his older sister, Kohaku. Sousei had been so taken aback by the scene that he couldn't move or say anything and inadvertently continued to watch. That woman, Ceara, was speaking with a hoarse voice, incessantly apologizing to her over and over and calling the phantom 'Kohaku.' Sousei never knew what she was apologizing for but heard Kohaku forgive her while saying that Murmur accepted her decision. That she could choose to no longer wield him as her djinn if she so wanted and he wouldn't hold it against her.

" _They waited much longer for king vessels to appear. He's willing to wait a few more years for you."_

The small Kohaku had come down to hug her just before it evaporated into bright flecks of green that vanished into thin air. And from his vantage point, Sousei had caught the sight of the small hairpin, the one that he'd seen his sister carry only after the fire. One she explained away by saying it belonged to the young vassal that had served her and that had died in the fire.

It was the same hairpin that he'd seen her hold out to show them that night in Balbadd. It was the prove that Masami had spoken about and one he knew about himself. Sousei never understood why he had never said anything to anyone and simply kept up the charade. He never understood himself for that decision.

Perhaps a part of him had wanted to think what he'd seen was a lie.

Perhaps a part of him had wanted for it all to be a lie.

After all, she had been a kind sister to them. She had taught them how to live, how to fight, how to survive. And above all else, she had loved them.

But a part of him had broken when sh—when Ceara had admitted to everything. All at once, he'd turned into a little boy again and was facing the reality of what happened during that fire. He'd lost his sister; they all had. And it'd ripped opened the wound that he had fooled into nonexistence after what he'd witnessed in the forest.

Sousei had lied to himself for years about it, doing anything and everything to keep that lie for his own sake. And in one night she had torn his makeshift reality into shreds. But even despite the grief and anger he felt, he couldn't keep himself from loving her. She'd grown with them and had given them nothing but love and sweet memories.

As things stood though, he couldn't bring himself to choose on whether he hated her enough to forsake her or loved her enough to forgive her.

" _ **Souchi.**_ " The small sobbing caught him off guard and got Sousei to turn to Suisei while she wept, tears streaming down her cheeks and eyes beginning to turn puffy and red. _**"I miss her."**_ At saying that, she bit her lip and frowned before burying her face against his arm _ **. "And I hate myself for it."**_

" _ **Don't,"**_ he muttered, taking his arm out of the sling to soothingly stroking Suisei's back like their sister always did when they were scared. _**"I miss her too."**_

"Why do we?" Suisei cried, turning back to speak normally as she pulled away from his hand and body. "I can't understand. After what Sami-nee said, after every lie, why do we care still?"

"Because we love her, Sui," he admitted with a small smile. His hand reached out and brought her head forward to let their foreheads touch. At doing so, he felt the drops that fell from his chin and found himself crying without knowing it. "She took care of us. She loved us."

"She lied to us…" Suisei muttered but Sousei could tell that she was trying her hardest to convince herself more than him. She needed it to be true just like he had. It had always seemed much easier to hate than to forgive, after all.

"Did she?" he asked, choking a bit at remembering words he finally understood. "Because...she may not have been the sister we were born to. But Sui, I think...she's the sister we welcomed into our lives."

Suisei couldn't keep her tears back anymore as she threw herself at him to cry on his shoulder. And as he held her as she cried, he accompanied her in their joint grief. Perhaps Suisei was having trouble still understanding being as family-bound as she was, but Sousei felt he was slowly losing the fight Suisei was fighting so hard against.

He did love her. He loved them all as his family. Despite their wrongdoings, despite their flaws, he loved them all the same.

And now Sousei realized he made a grave mistake by returning to Rakushou and leaving her behind by herself. Especially now when Masami had published such an outrageous lie. But that brought him back to his initial point: he had no prove to the contrary. He only had Masami's word on what Ko— _Ceara_ 's real intentions were. But he had a hard time believing that the 'woman that had killed Kohaku out of revenge' would plead for forgiveness to the same young girl so heartfeltly.

No, there was something strange about this all. And he would find out what.

" _ **Souchi?"**_ Sui's soft call came to deaf ears as Sousei stood from the bed and began searching the room. _**"What are you—"**_

"Prove."

"Prove?"

"Masami told us that Ceara of Eriu had held her under the threat of harming us so she would serve her. But I don't believe that."

"You think Sami-nee lied?"

"I don't know." Finding nothing in her drawers, he moved onto the closet that although mostly empty still had some of her old belongings that hadn't been moved since their arrival a year ago. "But I don't think she's telling us the whole truth either."

"Y-You should just leave it alone, Sou."

The small quiver in Sui's voice caught his attention and got him to turn towards his sister who now cowered and curled into a small ball on the bed. Her sudden fear and anxiety caught him by surprise and he focused his attention on her as he approached her.

Suisei was almost never this restraint. She was always the truthful one—unless it had to do with her sneaking around the house through the pathways and tunnels she'd found or made. During their childhood, their parents had always scolded her for doing it but she never stopped even then. She liked going about unnoticed and pranking others. Only when she saw really bad things would she come back to him in tears, telling him about everything she'd seen.

 _Everything except for that one night._ The night that she told him those same words. And all at once, he felt like they were thirteen again, him holding her as she cried herself to sleep afraid about whatever she'd witnessed.

" _ **Suichi, why should I?"**_

" _ **Because…"**_ She suddenly buried her face against her knees. _**"No, I can't tell. I promised not to."**_

"Promised?" Sousei repeated. Out of the blue, he reached out and grabbed her shoulders, holding her closer to meet her eyes as she tried averting them in vain. "Did you promise Masami not to tell?"

Suisei shook her head and covered her ears. "I didn't."

"You did." Sousei pried her hands away from her ears before whispering, "Tell me. What did you promise not to tell?"

"Don't make me, Sou."

" _ **Suichi. I won't let anything happen to you. Whatever she said to you—"**_

" _ **I don't want to end up like that."**_

" _ **Like what?"**_

" _ **Like Haku-nee…"**_ By that point, she was sobbing again as if she had remembered something most awful. _**"I-I saw her hurting her through the pathway walls. I saw and s-she found me."**_

 _The abuse?_ "You knew?"

" _ **She told me that Haku-nee had done something bad. And that if I was a good girl that nothing like that would happen to me."**_

"Since when?"

" _ **A-A-After they came back...from Haku-nee's first mission."**_

After her first mission...from which she'd returned from with her throat slit and no voice. Forgetting about Suisei's secrets, Sousei couldn't keep his mind from working on its own with this information. The abuse that started after that mission, the same mission where her throat had been cut, and Masami's severe cold treatment after it all. She must've found out the truth that day and done something...he didn't want to believe her capable of doing. But he'd seen her do worse.

Frankly, though, it explained a lot—from among them why Masami had suddenly turned to cold and hateful out of the blue—it certainly could explain why she would be lying now.

But still...this was all speculation. Pretty damn good work if he said so himself, but at the end of the day nobody would ever believe him with no concrete evidence.

That thought driving him, Sousei left Suisei to continue searching every nook and cranny of the room. He didn't know exactly what he was looking for or what would count as proof but looking was better than doing nothing. In a panic, Suisei scrambled from the bed towards him as he came to the closet's upper shelves and began pulling at his arms, pleading for him to stop.

"No, Sui," he said, using his better arm to keep her away and searching the shelves with his other one. "We shouldn't be lied to. We deserve to know who's lying and why."

"What good is it going to do now?" Suisei cried bitterly. "She lied to us and Masami is screwed up. Both of them did horrible stuff but we chose to go with Masami. We abandoned Haku-nee. And nothing we do will make any of this better."

Sousei stopped at that and turned to her with a serious expression on his face. "You're right. Nothing will make it better. Nothing we find will return us the real Kohaku just like nothing will change the fact that Masami isn't the best of people. But it can give us a chance."

"...chance for what?"

"To choose what we want to do from now onward. And whatever that choice is, even if it's not the best one for the family or for them, it has to be a choice that we can live having made." A wry grin came to his lips as he finished his small speech. "Because I know that if I leave things be as they are now, I won't ever live in peace with myself."

That seemed to keep her thinking for a while and allowed him time to search unhindered through the shelves. But there wasn't anything. At least nothing he could find right away.

"Behind it." He turned to Suisei as she stood a few feet behind him, her tear-stained face becoming one a bit more determined as she pointed up. Walking forward, she stood on her tiptoes and jumped a few times to knock at the far wall of the upper shelves.

The noise it made. It was hollow. Stepping forth to stand beside her, Sousei reached over easily and knocked at the walls hearing a distinct low sound that suddenly changed as he tapped the wall Suisei had knocked on. Pushing on it hard did nothing and it wasn't until he gave it a firm punch that a small piece of the wall broke off and fell back into the crevice.

"Shika's estate and Rakushou's palace have similar structures," Suisei told him as she wiped her face with her forearm. "Masami kept a lot of her things in one of these back home."

"You did search every square inch of our house, didn't you?" Sousei asked as he felt around the fairly large hole they'd uncovered.

"I liked knowing my own home," she retorted before leaving from his field of view. He was starting to get frustrated that he couldn't find anything until Suisei placed something before him. Looking down, he spotted the small footrest that gave him the few inches necessary to be able to see over the shelf. Sharing foot space, each set a foot on the small rest and lifted themselves over to see a small gray box to the far corner of the hole. Taking it out, the two sat down on the floor and emptied the box finding nothing but papers.

"Parchment?" Suisei called, looking at a couple at a time in her hands.

"Letters," Sousei corrected her as he looked at one in particular then at another and another. And they were all addressed to the same person: Cael of Eriu. Sousei waved at a couple of memorandums that they had gotten ahold of a few hours before and that they'd left on the bedside table. Without a word, Sui went to get them and brought them back for Sou to start comparing some of the things he'd recalled from the published paper. "Cael of Eriu is the supposed older brother that Ceara is trying to avenge."

"Why does Sami-nee have letters addressed to him?"

"Not just to him. From him, too." And as he skimmed through the numerous letters, Sousei was quickly noticing a clear pattern. "They were lovers."

"What?" Suisei spat out in disbelief.

"Look." He pointed out at a good amount that told of how they missed each other, how they couldn't wait to see one another, or the things they would do when they did. "There's no mistaking it."

"But—" Suisei grabbed one of the ones he held and looked at the small date written on it "—these were sent during the time of peace. Just before the expansion further west started. Wasn't Sami-nee already engaged by then?"

"Yes, to Prince Hakuyuu."

"Did she have an affair?"

"They weren't married yet. And a lot of these date further back to before their engagement." Sousei said, garnering that information from the letters as he began to arrange them in whatever chronological order he could. "But these show that she knew Ceara's older brother. In her memorandum, didn't she say that the Eriu family had served as mere foot soldiers and hadn't been anybody of importance?" Sousei only nodded as an answer. "Then how did they meet?"

"Father's battalion?"

"Not likely since no soldier ever got close to our fami—" No, one had. "Father's right-hand man."

"What?"

"The soldier that was father's right-hand man. He's the only one I can think of that ever had any contact with us."

"He was Cael of Eriu?"

He had to be. It made sense then how they knew each other. But it didn't make sense as a whole. Picking up the memorandum again, he read through it, taking every word in as he did. If he'd been Masami's lover, why would she be defaming him, and more to the point, his little sister?

 _She isn't._

"She's using him as an excuse."

"What do you mean?"

"Masami is using Cael's death as an excuse for Ceara's actions. She claims that after he died, she disappeared for those three months where she captured that djinn, Murmur, so she could avenge his death."

"We can't disprove that, though. She disappeared, remember? Only Haku-nee would know what really happened."

"It's true that we can't know but we can prove that Masami knew about Ceara's disappearance and had been searching for her during those three months," he said, raising a specific letter that didn't fit in with any of the others. It was a letter responding to what he assumed had been one from Masami. It was from the refugee camps that were established in the Eastern Isles and they were informing Masami that no girl by the name of Ceara of Eriu had come to them. "If she knew of Ceara's existence then and had been searching for her, she'd done it out of concern."

"Concern for the little sister of her late lover," Suisei finished understanding what he meant.

"Why would she search for the little sister of someone she claims to have never known?"

"Let's find out," Sui replied, quickly going through the letters that she gathered around her.

With a nod, he told her to go through each letter carefully to see if there were any others aside from the love letters. If Masami had found out anything about Ceara during those three months but said nothing after she came back to their household then it had to be because of something. If they could find anything else that contradicted Masami's memorandum, it would do to connect more dots.

It could work.

They could find out the actual truth.

They just needed time to piece it together.

* * *

"We made a mistake by letting her leave Balbadd."

Kouen couldn't agree more with his brother. "It's too late to change anything. What's done is done."

"And now the people are expecting answers."

Imagining that situation only brought him a headache. These parchments had been spread all over Balbadd in the matter of a few hours after first light and their content was more than ludicrous.

It told what it deemed to be the truth of who Reizei Kohaku was and how she had lied to all. It told about a child conquering a dungeon, using it to kill the actual Kohaku and how this child postulated herself as her double in order to avenge her brother's death by the empire's and the Reizei family's hand. It told of how Ceara of Eriu threatened Masami with harming the twins if she didn't do as she told her. It even cast doubt of why she had began her personal projects: how the orphan houses were only raising the children to gain the profit from the government and how the memoirs were being used to keep a watchful on eye on those who knew her or her family. And to top everything off, it even mentioned them by name as knowingly sheltering a murderer without promising any sort of retribution for the Reizei Family or those that she had harmed.

Everything was a meticulous fairytale that had been concocted to fool those who knew nothing. Those who didn't know the truth as they did.

It had been Kouha who had brought it to their attention that morning. Being the only one that hadn't been mildly informed because of his absence, he'd been disturbed by the contents but was taken away by Kougyoku so she could explain some of what she knew after leaving the memorandum behind. And just a few minutes ago, his own household had come forth with concerns that the soldiers and a large portion of the citizens had come with to the soldiers posted before the palace entrance. Some wanted verification on the accusations which he assumed were the people she had the most contact with; others were merely angered over the news that such things were being allowed to happen under their watch.

Some had some sort of axe or another beside them while others held theirs at the ready to strike no matter how dull their argument, but mostly everybody wanted to be given a reason to grind it.

"Do you think she's seen this?" Koumei asked as he looked out the window to the outside were some people still stood—mostly soldiers or people of Kou that had gone to Balbadd—even after the guards kept constantly dispersing them.

"I don't doubt it. As such, it won't be long before she bur—"

The doors of the meeting room suddenly burst wide open as Ceara stormed into the room not caring for the household members that threatened to get her out. Kouen gave them a dismissive wave of his hand and allowed her to stomp her way to them.

"You said no one else would find out," she exclaimed, her cheeks flushed profusely darkening her fair skin.

"Miscalculation," Koumei told her. "That Hakuryuu has control of Rakushou left no way for us to monitor her actions."

"That's why you shouldn't have trusted her to leave." As infuriated and anxious as Kouen could see she was, he watched her as she began pacing the room unable to keep still. "Now the people know and it's chaos out there."

"What the people know or don't doesn't matter," he clarified. "It won't affect anything."

"That would be true if we were talking about you or Koumei or Kouha. The same doesn't apply for me." Going over to the window, she gave the outside a glance, her own gaze turning dark as she motioned her arm out to show him. "Look at them. I have spent more time socializing and connecting to these people than you. They put loyalty in other than just the name I had; their loyalty was to the person I postulated myself to be. I was the general's daughter that cared for and looked after the working class. With that illusion broken, everything I've worked with them to accomplish will break down."

The idea of that seemed to hurt her as she brought her hands up to her chest. "The orphan houses won't function when the volunteers working them don't believe in me. Neither will the memoirs when the soldiers stop giving their accounts. None of the things I've built can function without their trust. All this work for them will tumble down because of this and it'll hurt so many."

Frustration got the best of her as she groaned and buried her face into her open hands. "I told you. People like her don't need a damn reason to hurt others. They just do it for the sake of harming them, to make them hurt just as badly as they are. And it won't stop..."

Out of the blue, she ran across the room towards the exit. Uneasy about her words, Kouen turned to her and spoke with a stern voice, "Where are you going?"

The question made Ceara stop as her hand came up to the handle of the door. "To try and find a way to fix this." A slight glare over her shoulder his way made him wary of what those words could mean. But it certainly gave him a hint of what she'd say next. "Because I know damn well nobody else will." She slammed the door behind her as she left, leaving Kouen bitter.

There was no doubt now for him that she was still quite resentful about before. It had been hard to deny her before especially because of how desperate she had appeared. Kouen had felt some remorse at denying her his help but he had more important things to handle with what extremes Hakuryuu was taking. Now, however, the same unease that had planted itself weeks ago grew from what she had said.

 _She won't do anything. She can't._

Kouen had to remind himself of the egg that he planted in her. Surely, with it there, she couldn't possibly do any harm no matter how angry she was at what was happening. Frankly, though, he couldn't say he completely disagreed with her reaction. This was only adding unnecessary troubles and it indeed made him incredibly irritated.

"My brother and king." Kouen lifted his gaze to meet Koumei's as he stood before him. "We must assuage the soldiers' reservations. Especially those of the Southern army."

Calming the rage and uneasiness of their soldiers came first. And there was only one way they would do that with any positive outcome. "Let's go."

"Correct me if I'm mistaken but there would be no merit in mentioning what she's told us, correct?" Koumei asked, already knowing what Kouen had in mind to calm the soldiers.

"Right." Kouen thought over things quickly as they headed out of the meeting room. Once out, he ordered his household to gather the crowd at the barracks for answers before leaving for said location. "We need only mention our intentions with how we will use her for the subjugation of the west."

"And if they demand imperial punishment?"

"I won't give it." It was the one thing he would refuse to give them or anybody else. "Her powers are a necessity. They will accept that as fact."

Koumei nodded and kept up with him as they neared the barracks where a crowd would surely form before long. "As you say."

* * *

After giving up and suffering so much for their sake, a single parchment filled with Masami's lies had destroyed it all. People were angry, they were anxious, and they wanted the truth. And like everybody else they would want restitution for what she had done. But what baffled her most was that they believed Masami's words over her actions, over all the good she'd done.

 _Lies. That's all they are._

The sudden thought made her stop in her manic pacing as it repeated in her head. That's right. All that had been in that memorandum were nothing more than lies Masami fabricated. Ceara knew that after this, her credibility was beyond broken. But even so, there was no use in her fighting this with the truth. Doing that would only hurt her more now that something as ridiculous as Masami's lies were out there.

No. To beat this, there was really no need for her to say anything. To fix this, all she needed to do was for Masami to retract what she wrote. Most of it had been lies. And being the one who had written them in the first place, only Masami's words would matter the most in changing any of them.

 _She needs to tell the truth._

Ceara had suffered through enough pain and suffering caused by her. Stupidly enough, she had believed before that so long as the only one getting hurt was her then everything would be fine. But now, Masami's actions had hurt others. People that had nothing to do with them or their fight. And if Masami could do this without a qualm of who or how many she was hurting in the process, then she could do anything to anybody. In the end, Masami had to tell the truth to fix this.

 _And if she didn't, then I will make her._

Out of the blue, a terrible headache started at the side of her head. It was one that had been there for days now and had been but a mild pounding at the back of her head. Now, it blew into a full-blown ache to the left side of her head.

Biting down her lip to ignore it as best she could, Ceara changed into clothes that would be better for fighting. Although the royal blue, white and silver robes flowed like any other she'd worn before, the trousers she wore underneath gave her plenty of freedom to fight. Lastly, she settled her metal vessels in their rightful places—tying the pouch with Murmur's broken vessel at her side—along with Suisei's and Sousei's household vessels. As she pulled up her hair to a bun at the back of her head, letting the longer strands fall freely behind her, her eyes lingered off to the small carnation hair comb that she'd set aside.

Kouen's present. Ceara got into the habit of wearing it ever since he gave it to her and that day wouldn't be any different. She held onto it as a reminder of what she had promised herself after the twins left Balbadd. No matter who or what, Ceara would do anything to protect them. And it appeared she would have to make true on that promise sooner than she hoped to.

Solo missions had never been her favorite. She hated having no one to fall back to. This was no different and it actually disheartened her because of how perilous a task it was. To retrieve all three, she would have to infiltrate Rakushou and safely get them out. From what limited intel she garnered over the past eight days, Hakuryuu had done away with his mother with a small army, one that would have grown larger with Rakushou's troops being taken. But normal soldiers were the least of her troubles. Only two factors really mattered to her.

One was Hakuryuu. If it came down to it, she could very well deal with him. Despite being fellow metal vessel users, Ceara knew that Hakuryuu's Zagan held no light against the combined powers of Marbas and Beleth. The ideal scenario would have been to negate his powers with Murmur but because of Masmai— _again_ —that argument became mute. But she outnumbered him where power was concerned.

The second one, though, would easily make her own powers seem meager: Judar. The magi was the real problem that hindered what could be an moderately simple task. Ceara had no idea how powerful Judar had become since they last met but from Seijin's account, there would be no point in going by herself to fight both the magi and his king's candidate.

 _But I won't be alone._

"Rakah."

"Yes, my dear?"

Eerie was all Ceara could think of as she turned to see Rakah standing behind her only a few feet away. The wide smile that spread across his face made her uneasy for a brief second before she addressed him. "I'm going to go after Masami and the twins to bring them back to Balbadd."

"Really?" Rakah chuckled somewhat amused at her claim. "The twins I get. The hag, though?"

"The lies she's spread won't stop no matter what I say." She secured her feather pen well in the folds of her ruqun before turning to face him. "But if she recants, things can still be salvaged. The pain she's caused can be reversed."

"You believe that?"

 _I have to._ But she didn't voice what small doubt she had, instead choosing to ignore his comment and continue. "Winning a fight against Hakuryuu when Judar's by his side isn't feasible for me. You said if I ever needed help that I should call for you."

Rakah smirked at hearing this. "Never said it would be free, though."

"You want my seal, right?" The way his lips curved up on one side told Ceara that perhaps this wasn't the best way to go about this. All the same, though, she knew it was the only way to fully convince him to support her. Seijin had explicitly told her about what Rakah had said, done, and what his aims were from what he said at the summit. And she had something that he wanted. If so, then she had the upper hand in all this.

And frankly, the faster they got this useless barter over with, the sooner they could leave and get Sou and Sui to safety and rid herself of Masami's shadow for good. Whatever she had to give in exchange—whatever this 'seal' was—she would easily do without if it meant reaching those goals.

Waving her hand dismissively, Ceara scoffed. "Then you can take it if you help me against them."

"That's not how things work, dear." Rakah walked closer after saying this, closing the gap between the two until there was a breath's space separating them. The smirk never disappeared from his face and neither did Ceara's uneasiness but his eyes brightened as he explained further. "I'm a broker and your powers can't be given so casually. You want my help, then pact with me."

Ceara raised an eyebrow at his words. "Pact?"

"A vow or commitment if you will from both of us," he explained with a shrug of his shoulders. "You name your terms, I name mine, and we shake on it. Simple, right?"

Her terms...

Because Ceara knew exactly what she was giving herself to, she took a longer moment to think exactly how to word it. Returning with the twins and Masami was a must. But she knew that asking for just that would be too lenient with Rakah. After what Seijin told him about the strange yet powerful magic that Rakah was more than capable of, she knew that she couldn't leave a single loophole with this man. And finally, after a minute, she mustered the voice to speak her terms.

"I want Sousei and Suisei back here safely, along with Masami."

"Absolutely."

"And—" she spoke up before he had any chance to say anything more "—I don't want those I love to be harmed in any of this; enough people have already been hurt. We will only fight if I say it's absolutely necessary and no other time. Am I clear?"

"Crystal," he said with a smile. "And in exchange, you vow on your life to bestow upon me, Rakah Azeri, the original gift you carry?"

"Original gift?" she asked, confused.

"Or seal." He gave a nonchalant shrug. "Really no difference in either except for the name. So—" Rakah took a step back before reaching his hand out to her with a gleam in his eyes "—do we have a deal, Ceara of Eriu?"

Her gut hurt from how much it screamed at her not to do this. But this was what needed to be done in order to save Sousei and Suisei. And if she had to carry the burden of using this person despite the danger, then she would.

"Yes." Without any more hesitation, Ceara took his hand in his and saw him grin briefly before a blinding light shone for a split second as three rings burst from Rakah's arm. The rings of dark light hovered over their joined hands before shrinking into place and marking both of their hands and forearms. As he undid their grasps, Ceara tried but failed to recognize the letters that were engraved against her hand. It didn't burn, didn't even hurt. It just left a strange sensation across her arm. But it wasn't the only one.

Out of nowhere, her mild headache from before intensified without warning making her grab at her head. It was a horrible pain that began running from her head down her spine and throughout her body. It quickly drove her to the point that she had to lean against the wall to keep herself standing.

"Let me." Ceara lifted her gaze as best she could to Rakah as he reached out his hand and placed it against her head without warning. A click of his tongue told her it wasn't anything favorable. "It's a pesky bird."

"Bird?"

"Egg that hasn't hatched yet, actually. By the looks of it, it won't let you proceed with this." Rakah scowled for a second before his smile returned. "I can negate the effects of it for a while. Not for that long but it'll give us enough time to do what we've compromised on." The pain intensified by the second and Ceara could do nothing but nod in agreement. "Then allow me."

A soothing sensation came over her a split second after he said that and after a few moments of feeling it, it took away the pain from her head. Not only did it take away the pounding headache but also the heaviness that had plagued her body. It made her feel lighter for some reason.

"Now, shall we?" Ceara lifted her gaze to Rakah as she let go of her head. The look on his eyes was predatory but it didn't feel that it was against her. No, when she looked at him, the predatory look changed; it became gentle suddenly. She didn't know which was real or if both were fake but it didn't matter. All was set and once she was successful, she would deal with the repercussions of what dealing with him meant.

"Let's go."

A shuffling from behind the doors separating her bedroom and antechamber caught her attention a brief second before her doors forcefully slid open as Seijin strutted in. Ceara hadn't noticed he'd been there or for how long, but it seemed he'd heard enough to know. Anger marred his youthful face as he passed a glare to Rakah before shoving past him to reach Ceara.

"Stop this, master."

"Jin—"

"You mustn't do this. It won't help anybody and much less yourself."

"You're wrong, Seijin," she told him sternly. "This must be done. I have to protect them and right the wrongs Masami has caused. This is the only way to do this."

"There's always another way." His anger vanished as concern etched on his face. "You taught me that. There are still things we haven't looked into. There must be something other than this that we can do."

"Try all you want," Rakah said, coming up to stand by Ceara's side. "She's already made her choice."

Without saying a thing, Ceara left Rakah's side to close the gap between her and Seijin. The boy smiled as she showed him a similar warm gesture. Reaching up, she brushed strands of his golden hair behind his ear before cupping her hand against that side of his head.

"You're a good and smart boy, Seijin," she said tilting her head to the side while smiling. "Which is why I know one day you'll forgive me for this."

 _Beleth._

The snap of her fingers so close to his ear caused the augmented sound to travel faster than it would have otherwise. The vibrations reached in a millisecond and Ceara saw the immediate effects of it as Seijin's eyes glazed over before he fainted. She caught him in her arms and hauled him over to her bed to lay him down.

Rakah whistled loudly as he followed behind her. "Cruel much?"

"I don't know what exactly he heard. But whatever it may have been, he would've run to Kouen the second we left," she explained, brushing the hair away from his sleeping face. She pursed her lips in regret but knew that it'd be better for them both if Kouen knew nothing of this.

 _Knowing him…_

Ceara didn't let the thought wander far. She had more important matters to think about. Turning to Rakah, she pulled out Beleth's metal vessel before nodding off towards the back of her room.

"Let's leave before anybody else comes."

* * *

" _Awake, child. You must warn them."_

 _...who are…_

" _Awake, Industria, and stop Caritas before she falls as Humilitas has."_

Seijin shot up from the bed with voice echoing in his head and gasping for air. Frantically looking all around, it took a solid second for him to remember what happened and why he'd been laying in his master's bed.

" _Which is why I know one day you'll forgive me for this."_

"Damn." Jumping out of the bed, Seijin ran out of the room and gasped at the sight of the outside. The sun had been bright out when he got to his master's room. It as clearly starting to be the afternoon now. An hour or maybe more he'd guess was how much they'd been gone for.

 _An hour. How much could they have traveled in that time?_

With whatever Rakah's powers were and his master's djinn equips, they could very well be crossing the Tenzen Plateau that very instant. There was no time to waste. Without caring who or what tried to stop him, Seijin ran until he burst through the door where the Kou princes were holding meetings still.

Ignoring the confused or shocked looks that Prince Koumei, Prince Kouha, or their households were giving him, Seijin focused on the one person he knew could stop his master.

"She's gone."

Prince Kouen's brow furrowed at hearing this. "What?"

"My master. She left with that man, Rakah, from the summit." His hands become fists from the frustration of being unable to stop any of it. "They're heading for Rakushou."

"Rakushou?!" Prince Kouha exclaimed before turning to his brothers. "Is she insane? She won't be able to hold her own against both of them."

Prince Koumei frowned as well as he thought over what Seijin told them. "Having that magician, Rakah, might give her an edge but…"

Seijin couldn't help his concern at hearing all the negativity but he was quickly shaken out of it when Prince Kouen's voice came over the room. "How long since she's been missing?"

"A-A few hours I think," Seijin muttered and coming closer to explain further. "She knocked me out when I tried stopping her this morning."

"You what?"

"She what?"

He ignored the outbursts from either of the youngest princes and continued telling Prince Kouen what he knew. "They made some kind of agreement. It's how she got him to agree to help her. She said she'd bring them back."

Silence came over the room with Seijin's last words. He was bitter that there wasn't much else to tell them but it appeared that the eldest prince already had something in mind. Sadly, it wasn't what he wanted to hear.

"We'll leave her be."

"W-What…?" Seijin stammered incredulous about what he'd heard. "Y-You can't be serious."

"There's no point in dealing with her insubordination. Her and Alibaba are both foolish to think they can deal with Hakuryuu by themselves but we cannot concern ourselves over a few stray soldiers with everything else that's happening," he said with a tired sigh to his words. "Return to your post, Seijin. That's an order."

Anger and panic surged through him and without knowing, he let them take him. "She trusted you. How can you just let her go like that?"

"Watch you mouth, Seijin!" Ri Seishuu spoke from his place with the rest of the household members.

Seijin stood back, ignoring him and giving himself space. "Master would've never gone as far as asking for that man's help had she had any here. You forsake her when you all are the ones she trusted most. And now she's given up something that none of us know anything about to a complete stranger."

"What do you mean?" Prince Kouen asked.

"Whatever power that he has," Seijin told him, "she does too. He wants it. And she's going to give it up in exchange for his help."

And none of them had any idea of how destructive any of it was. The small display at the summit held nothing to what Seijin feared that man was capable of doing. Aladdin said so himself, if his master chose to follow Rakah then they had to do everything in their powers to stop her.

"Let me go after her."

"Absolutely not," Kouen replied.

"Aladdin warned me about not letting this happen," he explained fervently. "But I did. We all did. If a magi was concerned because of the certainty that this would happen, then I'm afraid his other concerns might be valid as well."

"Aladdin said that?" Prince Kouha asked.

Seijin nodded, regret and shame coming over him at the thought. "He said that I should take care of her. To keep her away from Rakah. And If I couldn't then to stop her in anyway possible. That magi feared something like this happening."

 _Now it has and I couldn't stop her._

"My brother and king." Prince Koumei's sudden call to his brother made Seijin lift his gaze to see Kouen rise from his seat.

The piercing gaze of Prince Kouen came down on Seijin as he asked his question. "You swear this is all you heard?"

"Y-Yes," he stammered, feeling somewhat disturbed by the sudden change of tone. "It's what Aladdin told me before we left the summit."

Prince Kouen clicked his tongue and ordered his household members to leave the room, take Seijin with them, and watch over him so that he wouldn't do anything stupid like his master. The boy struggled as Ri Seishuu and Kin Gaku took him away from the meeting room and the three princes of his country. The same ones that were leaving his master out to die.

But it was hard to deny to himself that he didn't have any fault with her leaving either. He'd told her everything about Rakah except what Aladdin had told him. Seijin thought he'd be able to convince her if he tried. He thought if anybody would listen to him, it'd be her. And he thought that he could save her from whatever Aladdin spoke of.

He hadn't. And now none of them would.

* * *

It had to have happened now when that same morning Kouen had found out that both Alibaba and Aladdin were missing from Balbadd. Both he and Koumei suspected where they were headed, and after interrogating them, Alibaba's household had confirmed that Rakushou, and more to the point, Hakuryuu was their goal.

Kouen could fathom why the two of them, the bleeding hearts they were, would go to confront Hakuryuu despite what he'd done. He knew that it could happen, never thought it actually would.

And now another of his concerns came true yet again. The one he least wanted to leave and put herself in harm's way because of stupid and hurried decisions was the one that placed everything on the line to save those she thought needed saving.

Undoing his crossed arms from in front of him, Kouen reached out to the hilt of his sword, the metal ornament that dangled freely touching his fingers. _How come the egg hasn't hatched when she's already gone this far?_

" _Interference, my king,"_ Phenex admitted. _"And I can tell that it's the same magic that negated my powers when you hatched the other egg in Reizei Masami."_

So it had been Rakah that did it. With the kind of magic he'd demonstrated at the summit, he wouldn't doubt the man powerful enough to stop his djinn's powers.

"They're both foolish beyond belief, thinking they can stop this with their powers alone," Koumei said aloud, bringing his attention back to his brother. A few minutes after Seijin and their households left, Kouen had sent out Kouha to assure themselves that Parisa wouldn't attempt anything after finding out where Ceara left to as well. That left only himself and Koumei in the large, empty council room.

Koumei grimaced at some thought before he spoke, "Miss of Eriu more than Alibaba. The moment she sets foot onto Rakushou, it is likely that Hakuryuu will attempt to take her head as a general that follows under your command. Not only that but by attacking the capital that's now under Hakuryuu's regime, he will use it as an excuse to fortify his edict."

"I know." Kouen could see how that could be so easily twisted. By attacking Rakushou, Hakuryuu would say it was an attack against him that proved his words right. It wouldn't matter for what reason she was going there in actuality. There could be more dissonance caused by her than there would be by Alibaba's presence at the capital.

"I must say, despite what was said, my brother and king, I believe our best option would be to sent someone to stop her before she kills herself and we lose a valuable asset to our military or worse, this causes a wider scope of discord," Koumei added pensively.

"I know."

"You should go after her."

The suggestion made Kouen scowl at Koumei from how ridiculous it was. Before he could say that, though, Koumei continued. "I comprehend how foolish what I'm suggesting is but if she intends to go, there are few who can truly stand in her way. Neither Kouha, Kougyoku, nor myself can stop her by ourselves. She outnumbers us in power. Only you can stand on par where djinn are concerned and can easily subdue her."

Turning to Koumei, Kouen tries to understand where this was coming from. Koumei was never one to say such outlandish things, much less when he himself saw how insane they were. But as Koumei sighed and tilted his head, Kouen knew that he wasn't done speaking just yet.

"If it'll be better, I'll accompany you so that the trip is as short as possible," he proposed while rubbing the back of his head. "We can leave Kouha and the rest of our household members behind to take care of Balbadd for a few hours. No one will know where we've left to. It will be fast with both of us to stop her."

"Why are you so adamant about going after her?"

"Because I don't want you to regret having let her go when you could have stopped her."

For a second, Kouen couldn't think of anything to say. Regret. He surely had much of that surfacing nowadays. With Hakuryuu, with his family, and now with her. And despite how much he wished he could deny it, Kouen knew Koumei was right.

If he didn't do this, he knew for a fact he would regret it.

"This is absurd…" he muttered under his breath, unable to believe he was actually considering what Koumei told him.

His brother gave him a smile before coming up to him. "It is. But I know you will do worse if I don't help you now."

"I wouldn't."

"Maybe in different circumstances, I would believe you." Koumei kept his smile for a brief second before nodding to himself. "But as things stand, I dare say this would have been the first time I would see you do something as equally unreasonable as she has. After all, people tend to do the most unreasonable kind of things for the people they love."

Kouen pondered over his words for a second. His brother could really be a cheeky little smartass when he wanted to, even with him. But that didn't take away the fact that he was right. That was something Kouen couldn't deny to neither of them.

He had already let Hakuryuu fall. That was the one mistake he would allow himself to make.

"Inform Kouha and arrange for our departure in five minutes. I want to get this over with as soon as possible."

"Of course."

Koumei did well to prepare everything for their swift departure in under those five minutes. By the time everything was set, Kouha was standing back with the rest of the household members, including Seijin, as Kouen and Koumei stood at the ready. Obtaining the most current location through Phenex's untouched egg, the two had precise coordinates for the teleportation magic circle the latter casted with Dantalion.

"I'll take care of things here," Kouha assured them with a confident look.

Kouen opted to not say anything and occupied himself with thinking instead. Koumei was the one that answered him and offered some reassurance to their little brother. "We'll return shortly."

He only saw Kouha nod before he called Koumei so they could leave. Both equipped swiftly, Kouen choosing Astaroth, before both stepped through the magic circle that took them away. The plain they landed on after exiting was one Kouen recognized as being the plains that separated their country.

"There." Following the line of Koumei's pointing, clawed finger, Kouen caught sight of a blur of red and white alongside one of gold rapidly approaching them before the two figures halted before them.

Ceara glared their way, clad in Beleth's equip, while the blonde man, Rakah, hovered by her side. The circlets of green light vanished from her hands and feet, leaving only the ones on her staff as she scowled.

"Move aside."

Kouen didn't waste any time either. "You're returning with us."

"No," she snarled.

"You're an idiot for making a petty deal with someone as shady as him for something that doesn't matter."

"They may not matter to you." His eyes wandered to the tight hold that she took on her staff. "But they're all I have and I won't let Hakuryuu or Masami or you put them in harm's way. So if I have to deal with Rakah then I will."

It's then that Koumei stepped into the conversation. "You don't have to do this. They're more than capable of surviving. I doubt they would be foolish enough to put themselves in danger. "

"What they do won't matter," she told him, "not when the people wanting to harm them won't care. All this harm that Masami has dealt to myself and others who have nothing to do with us stems from a hatred that she spreads like her own personal poison. I won't let Sou and Sui be hurt because of what she's chosen to do, nor will I allow innocent to suffer because of her lies. I will put an end to both by making her recant."

"That's illogical," Koumei refuted her straight away. "Her recanting won't fix anything. The truth is already out in the open. No matter what you do now, things cannot go back to how they were."

Ceara frowned at the same time a pulse of vibrations swept across the fields. Kouen's eyes lingered on Rakah as he came to her and leaned closer to her ear. "You were right. They don't understand."

Out of ire and pure annoyance, Kouen aimed his sword toward him, sending the white dragon to attack him. But with a swift movement of her own staff, the rapid trajectory of his attack stopped as it crashed against the sound sphere she put up around them. The smirk that Rakah gave him infuriated him all the more.

"Unlike you, I won't let this propagate any further. Not when I can do something to stop it." Ceara twirled her staff to lay it parallel against her arm, the rings making the softest of noise as they rung above her head. "I will save them and you won't stop me. And if I have to resort to fighting you, then so be it."

* * *

She didn't let them attack first.

Dashing through with _Dajij 'Aghlal,_ Ceara shot straight to them. She had expected them to move to avoid her attack but to her surprise only Koumei stepped aside but only due to the energy that exploded outward when Kouen took her attack head on. His sword brandished before him, Kouen didn't move an inch, instead blocking her dash with his sword.

Shoving herself off of him, Ceara slowed herself a second to hear him move. The flurry of flames blazed through the air as they shot at her, but she quickly raised her own staff to scatter the particles around her and dissipate the fire away.

Kouen wielded his sword again but instead of attacking her, he shot a flurry of red to his left. Ceara didn't understand why until she saw the portal that had appeared beside him a split second later.

 _I didn't hear it?_

Those things didn't make a sound. Too late she felt the scorching heat at her back and turned ready to take the hit or defend herself if she could, but the attempt itself became unnecessary when a small black sphere popped into existence between herself and Koumei's exit portal. The black sphere sucked in air with a speed and force that threatened to pull Ceara towards it but it's strength took priority against the flames that came out and took them in. The sphere imploded and collapsed but nothing came after; it just disappeared.

"Don't sweat it, dear. I've got your back." Glancing to her right, Ceara stared at Rakah's back as he faced Koumei's direction. Flaunting his arm where a bright yellow insignia appeared, he smirked while gazing at her over his shoulder. "I'll handle the little brother and support you when and however I can. You deal with his imperial highness."

She didn't bother thanking him. Instead she spun in midair and without warning sent numerous wind sickles out towards him. Kouen took them all, striking each one of them down with ease, and it gave her enough time to rush at him. He was faster to defend himself, though, and parried her strike, angling the grip on his sword to bring her closer.

"You don't want to fight this—" he said calmly, as if the fight wasn't wearing him down in the least "—not against us."

"I don't," she confessed, her grip on the staff tightening even more and turning her knuckles white. "But I won't leave Sou and Sui where that evil lurks." Shoving herself off knowing she wouldn't move him an inch, she shot up skyward instead before using _Dajij 'Aghlal_ on her staff only, concentrating the vibrations to a much higher point where she could no longer hear them. Kouen followed to attack but with his momentum bringing him towards her, Ceara dove down just as he was about to reach her and struck down with her staff, forcing him to catch the attack fully with his sword.

Both their eyes widened at hearing the distinct cracking of metal from the concentrated vibrations against steel. Kouen got her to fall back quite a distance when the white dragon burst out from behind him, snapping its jaw at her.

He glared at her as he ran his hand across the blade now slightly cracked from the edge. "They made their choice and it was to leave you." He swung out his sword and white and blue flames spat out at a much higher intensity and much faster than before. Reacting on instinct, Ceara brought up her shield but noticed how fast it began to crack from the sheer force of his attack. "You have no right to deviate them from that."

More cracks appeared as the fire continued to scorch against her defenses but she held her staff steadfast. "They don't understand what kind of horrid person they chose to leave with. All she's done is gain power to destroy me for what I've done and has caused nothing but havoc in her wake. And if it's to bring that same evil to an end, then I'll do the same. I'll garner those same monsters to bring me closer to what I want."

In spite of the raging inferno ravaging against her, her ears caught his voice sounding slightly enlightened, "You're using him."

 _Just like I know he's using me._

She wasn't an idiot. Ceara knew that just as Masami was a person without redemption, Rakah wasn't a saint. He had threatened to kill her at the summit and she knew there was nothing good from pacting with him. But as badly as he wanted what he did, she wanted what she did just as much. And if using him as much as he was using her was what it took to bring them back, then she would let herself be used.

"I won't back down. I have nothing left to lose except them," she shouted at him, bringing back her staff and letting the sphere around her weaken. "So even if you all hate me for it, I will continue to protect them against what threatens to harm them." With a full swing, she brought the staff back down against the sphere and broke it herself, letting the flames shoot outward and back towards him as she took the recoil of her walls breaking.

Out of breath, Ceara watched from afar as the fire disappeared, leaving the sight of Kouen unharmed before her eyes. She clicked her tongue already having guessed that just hitting back his own attacks wouldn't do much against him.

Sound wasn't working. All she could do was keep him at bay with it.

Without undoing her equip, she called upon Marbas and switched them, her body turning to that of the small child with her fangs bared. Settling back against her hind legs in midair, she sprung forth with her claws fully clad in dark energy that crackled everything time he parried them with his sword. As agile as she was in such small form, though, a few of her attacks landed, ripping through the skin of his arms or chest. All the same, though, such close fighting brought her into greater proximity of his flames and burned her arms and legs as she continued to attack.

Pushing her away from him, Kouen followed suit and undid Astaroth to turn to Agares' equip. "If this is how you intend to protect them, then I see why they chose to leave you." Ceara couldn't help the anger that boiled through her at hearing him say that.

In a frenzy, she launched again but was significantly slowed as pillars shot out from the ground impeding her way. Her claws dug into one of the many pillars that rose, the energy breaking it in half and letting the top crash down against the plains.

Climbing up to the pinnacle, Ceara eyed the terrain for a second when no other pillars came out. From her vantage point, she could see Koumei and Rakah fighting, bolts of lightning and what looked to be spears of ice shooting one after another at the former. Dantalion's powers were well suited for a ranged match though and she could see how he was faring well by simply returning Rakah's attacks back at him. What she didn't see between the rising stalagmites was Kouen; he was hiding from her.

 _Hide all you want._

Ceara flared her nostril and took a huge breath that took in her surroundings. Initially, she smelled nothing but grass and dirt and fumes from what the lightning singed. But after everything else, she caught the scent of spices and earth different from the one they were on, along with the slight hint of vanilla.

 _There._ Concentrating the magoi into her hands, the energy molded itself into larger claws as she pivoted in time to catch Kouen's frontal attack, their hands colliding against one another at impact. The dark energy clashed and crackled around them but quickly dissipated as the two negated each other, sending them both back against the pillars he'd created.

"Just leave me be!" she shouted, one of her claws digging into the pillar. "This doesn't concern you!"

"Wrong," he called back hovering up to stand at the pinnacle of his. "You are of concern to me. And we will be bringing you back to Balbadd, conscious or not."

There was an obvious threat there. He was overconfident and she could tell why. Kouen hadn't expended as much magoi as she had. Even when the two had changed equips in the middle of the fight, hers had run out sooner with how many large-scale attacks she'd used and from the hours of traveling on Beleth's equip. She could already feel the grip on Marbas' equip slipping.

 _I need more magoi._

Good thing Rakah's limited magic coincided with one of hers.

"We'll see who that ends up being," she snarled at him. Forcing herself to change, the child turned to her fully grown woman-form as she hauled herself up to stand at the apex of her own pillar. Tilting her head to the side, she called out loud as she could, "Rakah!"

With a mere glance over her shoulder, Ceara caught how Rakah disappeared briefly from view, avoiding the redirected ice spears from Koumei, to reappear by her side. "You called?"

"I'm running out of magoi."

He smirked before he reached out to touch her back. "Then let's do something about that, shall we?" A strange sensation came over her just as a dark purple light glowed behind her. Despite not being able to see it, Ceara knew the seal that had appeared behind her. It was the same one that he'd called upon to use the Strength magic that allowed him to fly. And it was the same one that now gathered the corresponding rukh, the intensity of it pulverizing the pillar she was standing on from the excessive gravity. But instead of feeling that same pressure, Ceara felt her body revitalized as the rukh hovered around her, her ears humming as she felt a good portion of magoi coming back to her.

"This is all I can give you from magic that wasn't originally mine," he whispered under his breath just a few seconds before he made the seal above them disappear.

His support was limited but there was something invigorating about the magoi that coursed through her now. The rukh about her felt livelier somehow. And with what magoi she'd recovered, Ceara felt that she could very well finish this if she did it right. "Can you immobilize them?"

"Sure. The little brother for a good minute. Him for like eight seconds maybe."

 _Good enough._ "Do it." Bouncing off from the pillar's apex, she turned about and shot past Rakah towards Koumei who stood at the ready for them. Readying her claws, she kept her aim at the ready, her arm pulled back to attack, but feinted the second she saw a blur of orange and white fly past them letting her know Kouen went to protect Koumei.

Perfectly predictable. "Now!"

"You got it, my dear!" Rakah called out as a bright royal blue seal appeared beneath them, connecting to one at the palm of his hands. "Thalg Hajar," he murmured, his breath a puff of white from the cold that suddenly appeared around them. Before either Koumei or Kouen could move far enough from it, ice rapidly grew out and crawled its way up to hold them in place.

Kouen didn't waste a second in using Astaroth to burn it away but Ceara was faster and already began casting her Extreme Magic.

"Answer my call, great beast of yore. Eradicate with nature's ferocity all that which threatens your holy lands: _Sharisat Alttabiea!"_

Taking the magic and focusing it on only her feet, she turned them into rigid talons of black gemstone and took their weight and the intensity of the gravity she carried to propel her down towards them. But as she traveled, she saw the bright light of another Extreme Magic being casted.

"Spirit of Terror and Meditation, thou who gives power to kings, bring forth the great hellfire that judges the earth: _Astor Inqerad!"_

In the split second before her own attack landed, the white dragons that emerged from beneath swallowed her whole just as her talons made contact with the ground, shattering everything in the surroundings of the impact. As the gemstone broke off from her talons and she landed on the broken ground beneath her, Ceara struggled with the white flames that engulfed her. Like a python strangling her whole body, she felt the scorching touch of their scales as the twin dragons spiraled around her, tightening their grip. Beyond the flames, she caught the glimpse of Koumei and Kouen, both wounded from her own magic, fighting Rakah back as he fired off bolts of lightning to keep them at bay.

Wounds but only those; hers kept growing as the flames licked her entire body. Sharisat Alttabiea wasn't long lasting like Astor Inqerad. The flames weren't going to vanish. But as her mind struggled to fight against the pain to think of someway to break away from them, it froze and came to a different notion.

The notion of how impossible and absurd it always seemed for her to fight against Kouen. The fact that she had never been able in the past which lowered her hopes of winning now. Although she thought she had held her own against him well enough on this fight, the disparity between them had always been obvious. For an instant even, she believed that with Rakah's help she might actually have a chance that put the odds in her favor. But it hadn't.

There was no mistaking that Rakah was extremely powerful but his strengths were limited. Kouen had proven to have some limitations but unlike them, he was able to force himself past them and overcome them. Ceara never had a doubt that were pure raw power was concerned, she couldn't hope to surpass Kouen. This had only proven everything she feared.

 _I'm not strong enough._

But she had to be. For them. If she didn't defeat Kouen and Koumei now, Ceara wouldn't be able to reach Rakushou. If she couldn't reach Rakushou, then Sou and Sui would be left there to await whatever malice came over them. She couldn't allow that to happen.

 _I can't lose them._

All of a sudden, a strange burning sensation coursed through her, one that held nothing against the white flame dragons that tightly curled around her body. This scorching feeling coursed through the inside of her body, leaving a cool sensation wherever it went. All at once, it concentrated on the left side of her chest and around her shoulder. Grabbing at it, Ceara spared it a glance and saw through the flames a bright jade light glowing from her bare shoulder and chest just above her heart.

An eight-pointed star marked the margins of the seal and a small diamond over a smaller circle centered it.

" _If so, then this is yours now,"_ a soft voice whispered in her mind, " _the Silver Echoes of this world."_

"Echoes…?" she repeated under her breath. At doing so, she felt a pain that wracked the insides of her body; ungodly brisk vibrations originated from her very core and hastily left her body when she screamed from the pain they gave her. The vibrations caused by that yell casted magic she felt too similar to Beleth's as it forced the particles of air around her to be blown away, giving no more fuel to the white dragons and dissipating the Extreme Magic from her body.

The injuries from both Astor Inqerad and the strange sound magic that was casted rendered her to her knees as Marbas' equip vanished from her, leaving the echo of a soft hum coursing under her skin. Barely seeing it, Ceara watched Rakah throw a sharp lightning that struck in front of the two brothers and gave him enough leeway to make it to her before she fell completely forward.

 _What in the world…_

"You released the seal," Rakah whispered against her ear as he held her up by her waist and leaned her head against his shoulder. "Using those powers hurts you more than it ought to right now, but this is good."

"H-How?" she panted, unable to understand what he meant. Using her Extreme Magic had exhausted the source of Strength magic Rakah had given her. She had meant to incapacitate them with Sharisat Alttabiea as much as she could but it hadn't worked. Now she felt how she was running dangerously low on magoi.

"Equip Beleth."

"I-I can't." She couldn't fight anymore. The bitterness of knowing and admitting that caused small tears to begin forming at the corners of her eyes.

"If you were ever willing to trust me in anything, do it on this," he insisted, his hold on her hip tightening as he said it. With his other hand, he reached to the feather pen and placed it in her hand. "Equip Beleth."

Somehow, his determination fueled her own and gave her the mind to concede. _If I have to die, then I'll die fighting for them._

"Spirit of Vainglory and Champions—"

" _My king, don't!"_

But she ignored his pleas. "Dwell within my body."

The familiar warmth of her equip coming over her body soothed her for a second before she stabbed the end of her sound staff against the ground. An instant later, though, she felt the full toll of equipping with her magoi so perilously low. But it didn't last for long. Her ears hurt from the wings she heard fluttering around them and it amazed her to hear so many rukh surrounding them. That wasn't what shocked her most, though. What did was how almost immediately Ceara could feel her body less exhausted as magoi somehow restored itself from nowhere.

"...what?" she breathed and stood straight, amazed at how easily she could do so now.

"The Silver Echoes; their original gift was that of sound upon the world. Rukh that corresponds with sound magic will easily flock to you, entranced by the beacon you hold."

"Is that what I'm hearing?" she asked unable to believe the gentle flutter of their wings enveloping her like a warm cocoon.

"Yes," Rakah replied. His head tilted to the side as he came to face the two brothers that came strode forth from his last attack. Ceara could see they were injured but still not as much as she had been a few seconds ago. At least they could still hold their equips when she had lost hers. But with this she wondered who truly was better equipped now. "It's your original gift, Ceara. Use it to empower the metal vessel you conquered."

There wasn't enough time to reply or question his advice seeing as Kouen, fully equipped in Astaroth still, flew off towards them at a staggering speed. Stepping back, Ceara lifted her staff readying to cast a wall and heard the fluttering become erratic once more, her body hurting again as sound seemed to tear inside of her. Biting her lip to ignore the pain that wracked her body, Ceara did her best to concentrate what she could on her staff before sending of sickles of sound at him. These were different, though. They weren't just straight slashes of sound; the slashes were undulating erratically as if they could barely contain their shape from how rapidly they were vibrating.

Kouen took them in stride, though, striking them down as they came but at doing so the sickles broke apart, exploding into a barrage of overly high-pitched noise. The cacophony being so near him made Kouen stagger back as he grimaced and covered an ear with one hand, blood coming from the orifice as he retracted his hand.

It worked.

 _I can subdue them now._

Extreme Magic. The magoi that coursed through her was enough, she could tell, for one more hit with Beleth. Although not completely offensive, it would encase them, and she and Rakah would be able to head onward to Rakushou. And seeing as the sun was quickly beginning to set, Ceara didn't want to waste anymore time than they already had.

"Keep them away from me, Rakah."

"Roger that." Spreading both his arms out, the white seal with the gust of wind at the center appeared at his palms before whirlwinds formed and spread around them like a protective tower.

Aligning her staff parallel to her body, Ceara let the rings lay gently against her forehead as the sound echoed in her ears along with the fluttering of wings.

" _My king, refrain from this. You have done enough."_

" _He's right. We can leave now. Don't do this!"_

"I'm sorry, Beleth, Marbas. But I won't let anybody get in between me and those I love and have vowed to protect." Her hands held tightly onto the staff as she lifted it to stab it against the ground, making the casting circle for her Extreme Magic appear beneath her feet. "Grand champion of pride, lay waste upon the conquered and let your mighty warcry surrender them to their knees."

Breaking through the whirlwind barrier that Rakah had created, Ceara dashed straight ahead at Kouen and Koumei who had been but feet away trying to breakthrough it. Raising her staff, Ceara readied her aim but was slower to strike by a fraction of a second as Kouen brought his sword across her chest first, flames erupting and deepening the wound. Choosing to neglect the pain and how her body screamed at her to stop, Ceara continued her initial trajectory and brought her staff down against the floor.

" _Sijn Altanafur!"_

A small sphere of concentrated vibrations formed in the split of a second where her staff impacted the ground before it expanded into a dome around them. The ground beneath them pulverized as the dome formed, and Koumei and Kouen both dropped to their knees as those same destructive vibrations started messing with their brains and balance.

Ceara stood before them exhausted but unaffected by the cacophony that was starting to make their ears bleed.

 _Dull it, Beleth. Just enough to incapacitate them but not enough to hurt them anymore._

Beleth didn't respond but did as he was told. Ceara felt as the pressure from the vibrations was slightly lifted still strong enough to keep them on their knees.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, genuinely meaning her words, "but I have to do this." Giving them her back, Ceara stepped out of the dome's area to meet Rakah on the other side.

"Why don't I feel more tired from using Extreme Magic," she asked aloud as he came up to her.

"The seal," he offered, placing his hand on her bare shoulder. Ceara followed his arm up to her body where she could see the deep green seal that was imprinted on her flesh shining even through the deep gash across her chest and the veins around it pulsating and bulging disgustingly. "It will always fill you with magoi; one that works with sound magic to be precise. Can you fly?"

Simply thinking it made the green circlets from _Dajij 'Aghlal_ appear around her ankles and hands. Sound magic; so long as the seal kept refueling it, she could fight. Even against Hakuryuu and Judar.

"Good. But before we go—" Rakah pointed behind them to her dome "—let's get rid of them."

His suggestion made her brow furrow in confusion. " _Sijn Altanafur_ will hold until I'm out of range. By then we'll be at Rakushou. There is no need."

"I disagree," Rakah scoffed while glancing at the two behind her. "They've come this far to bring you back. There's no telling what else they'll try to do to stop you."

"No," she firmly responded. "I won't kill them."

A glint came over Rakah's eyes as he raised his arm, the bright yellow seal appearing again. "Then allow me."

"You touch them and I'll retract my end of the bargain." Giving him one long, stern look, Ceara gave him her final word, "We are leaving. Now."

Rakah's grin changed to a scowl at hearing that and he glared her way. "I've always hated your bleeding heart."

The phrasing of his words puzzled her but she didn't have time to ask what he meant when agony without comparison ruptured her head getting her to scream and fall to her knees. She was so distracted by the pain that she lost focus of her equip and let it fall.

"Sorry, my dear. They might not be that much of a nuisance to you but they have been a great one to me. Especially the older one." Rakah took her chin in his hand, lifting it so she would meet his gaze, and smiled just as sweetly as he had before. "I'll let Phenex's little bird deal with you for right now while I deal with them. And then I'll get my reward."

"Y-You c-can't—" she groaned through gritted teeth. "Our deal—"

"Is done," he called, spreading his arms out gleefully. "Our deal was to bring Sousei, Suisei, and Masami back to Balbadd safe and sound." He chuckled as he made his way towards Kouen and Koumei, the dome that had encased them no longer there but having left lasting effects as they struggled to stand. "Never once did you say that you had to live through any of this."

Ceara tried to push herself up and stop him but the pain from Phenex's powers only increased the more she fought against it. A second wave of that torture struck her again but she bit her lip this time to keep from screaming, tasting blood in the process.

Phenex's powers—a life djinn.

 _Murmur_.

But there was no answer. The pain grew tenfold as she called out to him again, her head feeling ready to explode. Through the pain, though, she could still see Rakah standing before them and raising his hand above his head as the bright yellow seal shone from his arm.

Anger and desperation driving her, Ceara tried again to stand and fight but the few steps she got only landed her a few feet closer before she fell, this time falling face first on the ground from the agony. The small silver comb fell into her field of view as it tumbled out of place. Tears blurred her vision but she managed to reach out and touch the silver piece and grasp it in her tight grip.

It baffled Ceara how she could think of nothing more than saving Kouen and Koumei from Rakah after fighting so vehemently against them. If she truly wanted to save the twins then what Rakah suggested was the better option. She should be capable of doing whatever it took to save them. Yet the thought of them dying turned her stomach and tore her apart even more.

Despite all the things she did and said, Ceara now realized that she couldn't have been more indecisive or weak about her resolve.

" _That's not it. You're not weak. Just blind."_ For some reason she heard the soft voice of a child—of herself—in her head. What was more, she could even conjure the image, imagined or not, of that child, stark blue eyes wide and full of a compassion that contrasted harshly against the solemnity in them. _"Look at what you've done and what it's caused. All that you built has crashed to the ground and instead of searching for a way to fix it, you let the despair of it consume and blind you. And because of it, not only did the people you care about get hurt, but you have also hurt them yourself in the process."_

" _You will never be able to do as Masami and Kouen have done,"_ the little girl said with a stern tone. _"You can't harbor those monsters within you, and the answer to why is simple."_

Her words struck a part of her that Ceara had been neglecting that whole time. The part that told her how wrong all of this was and the same one that told her that she could never do it if this was her approach.

 _I...can't do it. I can't do...as they do._

No matter how much she tried hiding her remorse and pain behind a rightful purpose, Ceara knew from the bottom of her heart that she could never justify doing all this wrong for what she wanted. Kouen had been right after all. What she wanted was to control what the twins chose—to control them—and even when it pained her for them to be there, Koumei hadn't been wrong either when he said that they were smart and capable enough to survive.

Ceara's eyes focused from their blur and caught the sight of brightness that hovered over Rakah's head. The two were so hurt and unstable from her attack that Rakah felt secure enough to garner as much power as he could on the one attack and it showed. The lightning that was gathering above his sealed arm looked powerful enough to pulverize anything.

Panic swept through her like ice, freezing her completely and making her grip on the comb tighten, the teeth of it painfully digging into the palm of her hand.

At the sight, everything that had happened up to that point flooded her mind. All Ceara had done—all the hurt she'd caused and kept causing out of her own selfishness—suddenly made her sick. She didn't want to be that type of person. She didn't want to fall like that. And most of all, she didn't want anybody else to suffer for the mistakes she made.

" _They will survive,"_ the child assured her. _"They always have. And despite what you have done, you will too. You all will live and learn from what's happened. After all…"_ The soft voice that had been speaking to her all that time suddenly became deeper and much more masculine. It was Murmur's. _"I chose you because you remind me of a very special person. One who, like you, loved so innately and wholeheartedly that it borne in her a desire to protect."_

"That's what I want—what I've always wanted. To protect them. All of them."

" _Then just keep that promise, little one,"_ he told her. _"No matter who they are or what they do, whether they abandon you or curse you to the depths of hell, you love them all the same. So long as you do, you shall be there when they need you and know well enough when to let them and yourself grow alone. Your protection will never be far off—like a parent who martyrs for their children so shall you for them for you love is just as whole, innocent, and strong."_

"I don't want this mistake to hurt them, Murmur," she confessed as she struggled to take a knee and lift herself from the ground while ignoring Phenex's magic.

" _I know."_ A bright light shone from her side and it took her by surprise when it shot up to the carnation hair comb in her hand, embedding the eight-pointed star on the flower. _"Which is why I'm here, little king, to help you right your wrongs. Let's stop this broker and keep your promise to your little brother and sister."_

"Right." Without a word, she called upon Murmur's equip, his magic and Phenex negating each other and ceasing the pain that stopped her from moving.

Forcing herself to move beyond the toll of using another equip, Ceara launched forward but did so a second too late. Rakah's arm struck down and guided the lightning to its target. Kouen didn't miss a beat and despite his unbalanced footing, stepped forward in front of the sharp and lean bolt that struck cleanly through the right side of his chest. He didn't take the hit for nothing, though. The bolt went cleanly through him missing Koumei and Kouen took the opportunity after the attack to slash at Rakah's midbody just as Ceara reached to hack at his neck with her scythe.

Rakah's body, though, seemed to disappeared in the fraction of a second it took for the two of them to attack. Skidding to a stop next to Kouen, Ceara glanced forward as Rakah's faint silhouette started to quickly refract in and out of view a few feet away from them.

"H-How imprudent of you, Speirr." Like his body, his voice sounded distorted. Like it was cutting from a faulty connection. "I was h-helping you."

"No, you were helping yourself," she corrected and frowned. "Just like I was. But I'm done dealing with you and your treachery and lies. I'm keeping my reward."

"Like h-hell you are," he chuckled, staring at both of them with a glare before it quickly changed into a wide grin. "B-But I'm a pa-atient man, C-Cea—" Ceara could barely understand him as his image began to refract even more than before, his voice distorting even further as well. "D-Dea-th has d-done us par-rt pl-lenty of times. I-I will wa-it f-for as long-g as it t-takes."

Without any other warning, his image refracted completely until it finally vanished like it had the many times before. After undoing her equip, a small pressure lifted from her arm at that same moment. Reaching up and rolling back her sleeve, Ceara watched as the strange markings from before that had formed after they pacted erased themselves, vanishing like dark fog into the air.

" _His contract broke,"_ Murmur hummed in approval and gratefulness.

 _Because he hurt Kouen. He promised me that we would only fight when I deemed it necessary and that nobody I love would be harmed. By harming him that last time, he did both._

Sighing in defeat, Ceara turned to the brothers that now stood before her, both still fully equipped despite their wounds with some more severe than others. For a moment, she turned to Koumei deciding that it'd be best to address him. "We should go back and get you two treated."

"We will," Koumei agreed but the scowl didn't disappear from his features. "But you won't be coming back without there being consequences, though."

Ceara hung her head at hearing this. "I know."

 _At this point, I don't expect any different._

Thinking back on everything, she saw how many mistakes she had committed, what they had cost her, and those she had harmed by blinding herself to the effects. A regret struck her at glancing over her shoulder to the east where Rakushou was; she hated that she wouldn't be able to secure anything where Sousei and Suisei were concerned, but at this point she couldn't do much except believe in them like they all reminded her to.

"Ceara of Eriu."

Ceara turned to Kouen at hearing him say her name so sternly and detached. This wasn't the man who had trained her, the one she fell secure with, nor the man that she just now— _regrettably_ —accepted she loved. This was the General Commander of their army, the governor of Balbadd, and the First Prince of the Kou Empire. "You are hereby detained and will return with us as a criminal under the charges of treason against the Kou Empire, the attempted murder of the princes of the Imperial family, and for military desertion."

Harsh but just was all she could think of. A small chuckle escaped her at the irony of what was happening. She'd fought so hard to get here and now she was giving herself up like nothing.

 _It's for the best._

Raising her hands with her wrists together, Ceara gave Kouen a small, grim smile. "Just promise me you'll make sure they're all right, okay?"

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _Gosh, I've felt horrible the whole of today. And what's worse is that I don't know why. Maybe the lack of sleep finally hit me mentally. But hopefully sleeping in early for the rest of the week will help me with that._

 _That said, I almost didn't upload this today. I wasn't feeling up to proofreading but somehow I got through it and it made me feel somewhat better (-w-) I don't know if playing League will lift my mood or not but I'll see about it._

 _What did you guys thinks about this? Despite all the action that happened, I didn't think this chapter would end up shorter than my usual count (odd). But 18K is still good, I suppose. FYI, the original plot I had written did not have this whole fight in it. I actually had to do it adlib and writing without having to look at something for reference really freed me and reminded me of the old days when I used to do that cx But I really liked how it ended up coming out :)_

 _Now Ceara fucked up and well, she gonna pay for the stupid things she did. Too bad she didn't listen to anybody that told her 'don't be stupid, stupid.' But that's that. And a lot of other little secrets came out too. Let's hope the twins find everything they can to refute Masami's words. And speaking of them, what do you guys think will happen to them now that Ceara won't go after them? Or even what will be Masami's or Ceara's punishment at Hakuryuu's and Kouen's hands respectively? So many questions but I hope they keep you occupied until the next chapter c:_

 _Real quick, let me thank the wonderful people that have Followed and Favorited since last time:  
_ _-_ _ **tinybean98  
**_ _-_ _ **Crimson. Haven**_

 _And for those who reviewed that I couldn't reach:  
_ _-_ _ **Esmee**_ _: It is so much information. *throws confetti along with this chapter* Have some more! And yeah, Noe is the woman that Ceara met that time (technically not the same one but let's leave that as that for now cx) And let's hope I mind read you well this time! xD And tell all of Holland hi from me (0w0)/_

For now I'll leave it at that. Lots of sleeping to do today and lots of studying to catch up with tomorrow. Well, I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and stay tuned for the next update!


	15. The Finitude of Life

_**Chapter Fifteen**_

The Finitude of Life

* * *

 _Nobody was in the room when Ceara chose to sneak in to visit little Hakuryuu. She didn't expect anyone either. Most of the adults, including Reizei Koujirou, were running amok searching for whomever had started the fire in the imperial palace. All of them had looked desperate to avenge their emperor and two crown princes who had been savagely murdered in that same blaze._

 _All of them searched and left the one person who had survived the atrocity in the hands of complete strangers. The only one she'd seen coming in and out while waiting for the right time to sneak in was Hakuei and Lady Gyokuen, but the widowed mother had taken her daughter away to rest. It bothered Ceara greatly that Hakuei fought so hard to stay when even she could see how tired and downtrodden the princess was. In the end, Lady Gyokuen took her away, ordering the healers to keep a watchful eye on Hakuryuu._

 _His treatment after they had found him had lasted hours and the poor boy barely survived his injuries. It took everything in her to keep her eyes trained on the boy as he breathed heavily and somewhat labored yet fully, most of his body bandaged to the point that it was hard to distinguish his face or tiny body._

 _Briefly, Ceara checked over her shoulder to make sure she wouldn't be kicked out by anybody before trotting inside and pulling a small stool to his bedside. He laid there whimpering despite clearly being asleep, obviously in pain with some of the blood from his burns seeping through. She pursed her lips uselessly stuck between wanting to change his bandages but fearing she would harm the already delicate state of his body._

 _Fire. It just reminded her of Kohaku and her family. Both people who had lost something amidst the flames._

 _At least Hakuryuu survived it._

 _Reaching out, she touched the tiny hand that grasped the linen sheets tightly. She had to pry his small fingers from it but as soon as she did, his hand grasped onto hers tighter than she thought possible. His breathing hitched and he groaned in pain._

 _Wanting to calm him down, Ceara leaned forward and gently swept matted hair away from his forehead as he moaned from his pain. His grip on her hand tightened making her wince but she didn't let go. She hated that she couldn't help him any other way, that there wasn't any other way to soothe his pain._

" _When this world is no more_

 _The moon is all we'll see_

 _I'll ask you to fly away with me."_

 _Ceara remembered Cael singing to her when she was sad. Singing to her when their father died. And his song—one he said their mother used to sing him—was the only one she remembered. The one she sang to herself when she fell to her woes._

" _Until the stars all fall down_

 _They empty from the sky—"_

 _Hakuryuu's grip tightened before lessening, his breathing becoming a tad bit more relaxed despite still being shallow. Ceara smiled to herself but felt the tears that stopped flowing at the corner of her lips at doing so._

"— _But I don't mind_

 _If you're with me_

 _Then everything's alright."_

 _Ceara soothingly stroke back Hakuryuu's hair, her thumb caressing his forehead. Leaning back and taking her hand away from his head, Ceara laid her head onto the bed next to him and continued to sing softly, thinking that it would help to appease him._

" _...Prince Hakuryuu."_

 _Her head snapped up and turned back to see Kouen standing at the doorway, door slightly ajar as he stormed into the room to the other side of Hakuryuu's bed. Ceara didn't understand how he was there; Kouen had been sent out to capture another dungeon, after all. But by the fact that he still donned some parts of armor, including his pauldron, Ceara gambled that his convoy had just arrived._

 _What a time to too._

 _His brow perfused with sweat and stains of what she could only think of to be blood. His eyes fleeting but not straying from Hakuryuu's condition, but also distracted by something else. At that moment, Ceara wondered if he knew about Hakuyuu, Hakuren, and Emperor Hakutoku._

 _But of course he did. How couldn't he with the commotion that's going on._

 _Her eyes strayed to Hakuryuu's other hand as Kouen grabbed it in his, kneeling before the bed which got her to gasp shocked._

" _...forgive me…" Despite his whispers, she could hear him choking on his words and it just made her choke on air as she sobbed, holding onto Hakuryuu's other hand tenderly._

 _As if praying, Ceara lowered her forehead to touch against the little boy's knuckles._

" _When this world is no more,_

 _The moon is all you'll see._

 _I'll ask you to fly away with me—"_

 _Her voice wasn't anything higher than a whisper but it was audible in the quiet room with only Kouen's apologies ringing through. Fighting her own cracking voice, she kept on singing, her lips tasting the tears that she cried._

" _Until the stars all fall down_

 _They empty from the sky._

 _But I don't mind._

 _If you're with me,_

 _Then everything's alright."_

 _Ceara lifted her gaze slightly from place and caught the mere glance of Kouen in the dim light. The sight struck her deep. Ceara had always thought the boy strong and unyielding which made the view all the more heart breaking as she watched the glint of tears at the corner of his eyes, some spilling down his face that he quickly wiped away._

 _The sight only made her all the more wistful and she couldn't do anything else but cry, her sobs choking her song mute as she leaned against the bed to weep into it as silently as she could. Her grip on Hakuryuu, like Kouen's, remained steadfast though._

 _They had all lost people in that fire—people that neither this country nor family would ever come to replace. And the hopelessness and anguish struck them all the same. Now all they could do was safeguard what had survived and wait for the wounds to heal._

 _Because they would heal. The only thing Ceara wondered was how much pain would the scar that remained cause them anytime they saw it._

* * *

Stuck in the cell, Ceara found herself without much to do in the empty room. Aside from a small bed, a table and chair, and small lavatory room to the side, there wasn't much to it. After a whole day and a half, since the night Kouen and Koumei brought her back and that following day passing, she explored all of the tiny room.

Besides being small and empty, there was absolutely no way to see the outside except for the tiny slitted windows that lined the forefront of the room. Even then it was just a view of the room outside of her own, another antechamber she guessed, that was heavily guarded.

Ceara didn't understand what the purpose of guarding her like so was needed anymore. The only reason she had even been able to escape before was because of Beleth's powers. Kouen made sure that such thing wouldn't be possible, seeing that even before they got back to Balbadd, he stripped her of all her metal vessels, including the hair comb he had gifted her.

Without them, Ceara returned to being a powerless woman. At least, so long as they kept her properly restrained. Otherwise she could very well take out any normal soldier with a sword. Not like she felt up to that at the moment.

With the imminent threat of the civil war, Kou would need all the soldiers it could get. Especially because any hope she had left of having the twins back safely rested in their hands. Her heart and mind were still plagued with concern for her brother and sister but, as she had seen, her hasty and idiotic decisions had done nothing but cause unnecessary trouble. Had she been sane enough to think about things straight, she would have realized that a certain way to assure their safety would be for the west faction of Kou to win this war. And that the best way to assure that victory would have been to join in the ranks one last time as General Reizei Kohaku.

That option was but a pipe dream now.

With what Masami had done and what she subsequently aggravated, her stance on that battleground would be shaky at best. No soldier would listen to her orders. No general would fight alongside her. If she joined that war—which she assumed would happen because of the power she held—she would go to that war practically alone with no one to back her up.

But that was fine. If she got to fight that would be something even when no one would support her.

 _It does suck, though, that it might be the last thing I do._

"I have permission from his majesty."

Ceara recognized Seijin's voice coming from the outside of the antechamber, even without Beleth, and clearly heard his footsteps as he came to the doors before the room. It amazed her that he still bothered to knock and await for her reply.

It was only after she told him to come in that the blond boy came without a word. He strode across the room and first thing he did was take a sit on the only chair that was there while giving her a chiding frown. Disturbed but knowing it was right for him to be angry, Ceara came to stand before him slightly averting her eyes from the shame but deciding to push that aside in the end.

"I'm sorry about everything I did," she quickly started rather quietly, "I know that it was idiotic."

"Beyond idiotic."

"Beyond idiotic," she repeated, her shoulders slacking from the remorse. "I know that a lot of people are left in trouble now because of this. And I hate myself for it."

"As you should." It felt odd getting a lecture from the young teen but as things stood, it seemed proper. Everybody had told her that but she turned a blind eye and deaf ear to them all. Concern, panic, and anger had clouded her judgment, basically darkening it. A part of her believed that she had been too overwhelmed to have made any sane decision then. Another, though—the same one that she had over this past year developed and ignored all the same—told her that she chose to do all that knowing the consequences deep down.

At least that was the conclusion she came up with. She didn't know if it was right or not. It felt like it but after what she did—what it cost her—it made her second guess herself.

"I can't undo what I've done, Seijin." Taking a deep breath, she ran a hand through her hair, undoing her large braid, before plopping down onto the floor to take a sit, her legs crossed haphazardly. "Of that I'm damn sure."

Lifting her stark blue gaze, Ceara met Seijin's deep green stare that didn't falter as he spoke. "So what are you going to about it now?"

She scoffed a bit surprised he'd ask that but knowing the undeniable truth.

"What _can_ I do?" she inquired, incredulous. "I'm locked up here under serious charges. There's no way to dissuade the people from thinking whatever they want from what Masami has done. And all I did was add more fuel to their doubt, proving her right. As things stand, I don't think that there's anything I can do to make any of this better. Honestly, I might just make things worse again."

"Is that all the value you have of yourself?"

The question caught her off guard, her brow furrowing. "What?"

"You think that anything you end up doing will just make things worse, so doing nothing will be better than doing something?"

"All I have done has made things worse."

"All you've done are insane things without thinking!" he shouted, making her flinch and her ears hurt from how loud he raised his voice. Seijin took a deep breath, his shoulders relaxing from being so rigid before he continued. "Out of all that makes you who you are, your pessimism and rashness are the things I can't handle. But that ends today."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm telling you that you're going to help me make right on all you've screwed up from the stunt you pulled the other day." Seijin pulled up the satchel she hadn't seen him wearing before he pulled out scrolls and bound books to place them neatly on the table.

"I can't help you," Ceara told him standing up and scurrying to the table to stop him from emptying his things. "I'm a prisoner. I can't legally—"

"I got permission." This baffled her seeing as the only one who would be able to give that was either Kouen or Koumei. Before she could ask who it had been, Seijin stood from his seat before turning to glower at her. The determination she saw in that glare shocked her and his words only added to her bafflement. "His majesty acknowledged that you shouldn't be let off scot-free after what you did. And I agree. I may have no idea what he's got planned himself but I did get him to agree to this." He motioned out to the scrolls that sat on the table with a single swipe of his arm. "You and Reizei Masami have cost our people precious resources and connections. As such, you owe it to them to make right on your mistakes. So for once in your life shove that pessimism aside and do something about it."

 _Pessimism._ It was true that some people did call her out on that, especially when things tended to turn dire. It was useful when she could think straight because it helped her think of every possible way things could go wrong and prepare in advance for them. Not so much now after the fact, though. Now all it did was impede her from completely admitting she made mistake, from moving forward, and most importantly from fixing what she had made worse.

 _It's worse. But it's not hopeless._

She had to believe in that. She had to believe that even after what she'd done there was still a way to make things right without doing any worse. She had to believe there was another way.

Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath to compose herself. There was always another way. It was a matter of finding it amongst the wreckage she left behind.

"You're right. Moping won't get me anywhere. Much less to the people that need me." She smiled back at Seijin despite his frown still being very much present. "Thank you, Seijin, for not giving up on me."

The frown remained for a split second before he blinked and his whole demeanor changed. A small crooked smile came to his lips and he nodded, his deep mossy eyes sparkling a tad bit. "Of course. As vassal I'm supposed to be there in the good times, the bad, and the stupid."

Her smiled became smaller at hearing him say that. It was unbelievable that he still saw her as his master even after all that. The boy was truly a saint. "How can you be so forgiving?"

"I have faith," he just said as he sidestepped to leave the seat to her. "Faith in you and the people that lead this country. That's all I have, really. Besides, it's not like I completely forgive you for knocking me out."

The words reached Ceara as soon as she took her seat, making her shrink into it from the regret. "Of course not. I am so sorry about it."

"Don't apologize. Instead, help me fix this and it'll be a start." Nonchalantly, he pried one of the scrolls open before laying it out to her. "Speaking of which, we should start with this."

Ceara didn't know how long they spent inspecting every little problem that had arisen. Certainly some good hours since her evening meal came in after a while. But she refrained from eating more than a few bites before going back to working with Seijin.

According to him, there were three massive hits that her and Masami's actions had caused and aggravated.

First, the orphan houses became very shaky at their foundation. The volunteers, after hearing about what had happened and her charges, were quickly dispersing and leaving the houses even more understaffed than before. The ones that stayed, widows or older women, only did so because they were provided with free housing and extra rations from working there which kept them alive.

"We have allocated what resources we could but with everything that's happening with the civil war, they're scarce as it is."

Ceara could see that plainly by the declining numbers on the scrolls that held the information for the different houses. There was something that bothered her, though. "These are all still under my name."

Seijin's brow furrowed but looked at the papers to assure himself of that fact. "They haven't changed them yet? Odd. We should do that, shouldn't we?"

"Absolutely," she confirmed. "The people won't lay their fear to rest if on paper I'm still in charge of these facilities." She shook her head as she stared down at the numbers. Even with the government's support, there was still a steady decline after the sharp dive it made a couple days ago. The alternative to her name, though, made her stomach turn. Nonetheless, it was the better option at the moment. "Make it a governmental facility."

"Are you sure?"

"Once they see it's been taken away from me, they'll see that Kou's parliament and its imperial family are doing something to make this right even through this chaos we're in at the moment."

The likelihood that the numbers would keep declining was high, but if it worked like she thought it could then they wouldn't be on a deep dive forever. If anything, the citizens would be less against the houses being run by the government than by her. So even if they did go down, they could recover once this whole commotion was dealt with. It took Seijin maybe half a minute to jot down the importance of all she said before they moved on to the next topic.

Second on the agenda was how the memoirs were a wreck. After the memorandum and word spread, fewer letters than before were arriving for her which completely stopped after her charges were announced to the public. What was worse, some of the soldiers that had already given their anecdotes wanted their letters back, not caring whether they were transcribed properly or not. Everyone was suspicious and she couldn't blame them.

"Give me an estimate," she asked, lifting her legs to sit cross-legged on the chair as she gazed over the demands of soldiers who wanted their letters back. "How much of the accounts have you transcribed before this started?"

"Percentage wise?" Ceara nodded. "A good eighty."

"How long might the other twenty take you?"

"Three days," he said. The furrowed brow she gave him made Seijin rethink his answer as he massaged the back of his neck. "Maybe a day or so if I don't sleep."

"Make it a day," she demanded, narrowing her eyes on the demands of the soldiers. "Transcribe everything and then return the originals."

"They don't want you with any of them, though. Should we really keep them waiting with how frustrated they already are?"

"Make up an excuse: you have to gather them from all over the library; you have to ask for permission from the princes. Something, Jin, so that it gives you enough time to transcribe what's left." Mindlessly, Ceara played with the small feather pen that he'd brought, brushing the tip of it against her chin. The action reminded her of Beleth and the others, and their absence stung her. She put the pen down before bending one leg so that her chin could rest on her knee. "If we return them, there's a good chance they'll destroy them. Some of those accounts are from soldiers who've already passed on. We can't let those stories be lost."

Briefly, she eyed Seijin for an answer. All he did was nod in agreement.

The third and most problematic by far was the people themselves, mostly soldiers and commoners that she had worked for prior to all this. They were vehemently asking the imperial family for retribution.

Ceara as Reizei Kohaku had taken away from them their people and lands under false pretenses. They didn't want retribution for the one family she took over but for the countless others she conquered. According to them, had they known she wasn't part of the Kou Empire's army, they would have fought back. That's a claim she didn't doubt either. Ceara knew that many of the people she convinced to cede only did so out of fear of what the Kou Empire could do. Despite having once commanded the Southern Armies, that amounted to barely 100,000 men, a number that decreased by almost three quarters after Hakucho. By no means had she led a huge army the likes of Kouen's or Kouha's but she hadn't needed it. Not with the threat of Kou as a whole behind her. Now armed with that knowledge, people wanted what was right by them.

A foreigner had conquered them under guise and protection of the Imperial Family and the Kou's military. There was no way for them to have their lands back, that they knew, which is why they were adamant about calling for imperial punishment.

One head for thousands. Blood for blood. It wouldn't be enough but they believe it would quell their anger.

"His majesty denied them the imperial punishment." Ceara had heard him say that title before but hadn't been quite clear on who he was speaking about. At asking, Seijin pursed his lips. "Emperor Kouen, master."

"Emperor?"

"Prince Hakuryuu declared himself the rightful heir and Emperor of the Kou Empire in the east. To counter and quell the people's fears, Prince Kouen crowned himself as Emperor of the western Kou Empire."

Goodness. This had truly split their country in two.

"And he's been denying them imperial punishment?"

Seijin nodded. "The reason for it is because of your powers. He claims that he'll be using you to fight against Hakuryuu."

"Sounds about right."

"To be honest, I don't think he spoke that with any truth." That comment got Ceara to face her young vassal to ask how so. "Well, for one this was only publically announced. But from what he told me, his majesty said he would keep his word."

His word? Oh. _To not execute me._

But that didn't make sense. He made that promise because of her past misdeeds; that had nothing to do with anything now. It was the same reason she was imprisoned here now and not before. He pardoned the actions of a child, not of the conscious adult. In the end, though, Ceara chalked it up to his overall war plans.

Hakuryuu and his small army would be rendered helpless with the six metal vessel users they possessed. And between her and Kouen, they could easily annule Zagan's powers using Phenex or Murmur.

"Master?" Ceara hummed her small acknowledgement as she spaced out, gazing into a certain point of the wall in front of her. "Although he told me not to, I think you should be made aware of this." The sullenness in Seijin's words caught her attention, making her face him with a puzzled look. "Aladdin and Mister Alibaba arrived a couple of days ago."

That didn't make since. "From the summit island? Isn't that a little late."

Seijin shook his head. "From Rakushou."

 _What?_ The mention of it got her to shoot off from her seat, stumbling with the chair as she grabbed Seijin by the shoulders. "Did they see them? Are they okay?"

"They don't know them, master," Seijin reminded her. "Even if they did, there's no way to ascertain it was them."

The words dosed the small embers of hope that the information had ignited. Sadly, she had to recognize that Seijin was right. Neither Aladdin nor Alibaba ever met Sousei or Suisei. Calming herself the best she could, she asked what had happened and the somber look that came over him was something she didn't like.

"Aladdin arrived a few hours into the night after you and his highnesses...with Alibaba in coma."

"What?"

"He's been like that for almost two days. The magicians under Prince Kouha, Parisa, and Aladdin himself are searching for a way to make him better as we speak."

"How did it happen?"

Seijin pursed his lips again and shook his head."Prince Hakuryuu did it." He took the next couple of minutes to tell her all that he found out about the situation through Parisa.

Aladdin and Alibaba went off to Rakushou to convince Hakuryuu to abandon his plan for war. He hadn't listened and a fight ensued between the four of them, Judar included. In the end, Hakuryuu lost his legs but dealt Alibaba a deadly injury with his new metal vessel, Belial, while Aladdin made the choice to kill Judar.

Hearing those news choked her. Judar was gone, Hakuryuu wasn't backing down, and Alibaba was in a dreadful condition.

 _Gods why…_ Ceara held in the need to cry and cleared her throat to due away with any sobs that would've escaped. There was no time for that. "What about Phenex?"

"Nothing," Seijin told her. "Parisa mentioned that it was strange, something about his rukh but didn't know how to explain it well. At the moment, I believe Aladdin is using those strange powers of his to search for a remedy."

Strange power. He must mean Solomon's Wisdom. The same power he used back in Magnostadt to enter the rukh of the Medium. Ceara didn't know if that would work but she hoped and would pray it did. Both of them were good kids. And she didn't wish the sadness of losing a close friend on anybody.

Late as it was, Ceara told Seijin they were done for the day but got him to leave the documents behind. "I don't have much to do here. Might as well think of some permanent way to fix things while I'm here. You take care of what we talked about."

"Certainly." Seijin saluted her but before he left, dug through his pockets again before bringing out a journal. It looked brand new, the bindings a dark maroon with gold etchings around the edges. He placed it on the table with a half-smile. "I know it's not the same but it's better than the one that got torn. Goodnight, Master of Eriu."

She shook her head at how odd that sounded but returned the gesture. "Goodnight, Jin. And thank you."

It was after that he left for good, leaving her alone in the small yet vast room yet again. Sitting in front of the desk, Ceara tried looking over the documents for a couple of minutes before a yawn came out of her. Finding it hard to keep awake, her eyes went over to the bound journal that Seijin left behind before she took it in her hands.

The book was brand new and it seemed to have garnered quite the fee from the boy by the feel of the pages as she flipped through them.

 _To replace the old torn one, was it?_

Her journal that had been more than torn apart, really. At remembering, she also recalled the letters that had been turned to ashes. Those had no replacement. The thought alone made her heart heavier than it already was.

But it wasn't like they were completely gone either. At least not all of them. Taking the pen that Seijin left behind, Ceara opened the journal and tapped at the first page, leaving behind marks of ink. All it took was a quick scan through her brain to recall one of the many she had memorized before she began writing the words that were fresh in her mind onto the blank page.

They all started and ended the same.

" _My dearest little Ceara,"_ and, _"I promise I'll return home. Always."_

Sadly, that was a promise Cael couldn't keep. Promises seemed to be breaking right and left ever since Magnostadt. Ones she made to Sousei and Suisei, to Seijin, to Kouen and the others, to herself.

The only thing now was that there were no more promises to keep, no more to break. In a way, it was good; in another, it was bad.

 _Wait. There is one._

A small chuckle escaped her, baffled that she could have forgotten such a thing. Compelled by her conscious, Ceara turned the book to the back cover before opening it and writing. It took her almost two hours to put her thoughts into words and it ended with a good number of letters. Some were her last words to those already gone. The remaining ones were words for those she knew that still remained in the world.

Of those many, she only ripped out the pages of three: Hakuryuu's, Masami's, and Kouen's.

Ceara wished she could send each of them to whom they corresponded but that was a null thought. At least writing things out made her thoughts easier to digest. Mindlessly writing what she felt helped condense the information and small portions were easier to take. It wouldn't reach them but she would at least have it off her chest.

A sudden pitched noise that she hadn't noticed before rung through her head and racked her brain so bad that it made her wince. Reaching for one of her ears, the earlier noise was already gone, having left as fast as it came, yet deep in her eardrum she still felt the quiet vibrations and the low hum that accompanied it.

 _They could still be hurting from the fight._

The first time using Silver Echoes had left vibrations—aside from the bulging seal that had barely started to reside—that left some aftereffects: small buzzes she heard from time to time. But they all went away eventually.

And as annoying as that small hum was just sitting at the back of her mind, surely it wouldn't last for long either.

* * *

The instant the young magi's tears poured from his eyes and he crouched down in a futile attempt to wipe them and his grief away, Parisa stepped out of the room.

Five days of searching for a way to cure Alibaba-dono proved fruitless. Parisa, alike Reirei and Junjun, could see how the rukh inside the young man was no longer human. And despite his body still functioning, that too would halt soon enough. Even through the other side of the door, Parisa could clearly hear their cries of anguish at having realized what they as magicians already did.

Alibaba-dono was as good as dead.

" **Parisa!"**

The panic that rose in her from Seijin's loud exclaim made her jump. Wiping the small tears that sprouted before lifting her gaze, she met the young vassal just as he almost stumbled into her. Seijin stopped inches in front of her but quickly took her by the wrist and dragged her behind him without another word.

Parisa struggled to raise her voice, preoccupied more with breathing with how fast they were running. "S-Sei!" Her calls were useless though. Seijin was far more preoccupied and hysterical with whatever or wherever he was dragging her to. "Sei, what's going—"

"It's master!" he called out, turning a corner just as he glanced over his shoulder to address her. "She's—"

Despite seeing them the second they turned the hall, Parisa wasn't quick enough to stop Seijin and with how fast he was going, he collided with the emperor and his younger brother. All she could do as his majesty raised a questioning eyebrow was pull Seijin to steady him on his feet. The boy, however, didn't bother giving an explanation.

"We have to hurry!" Seijin completely ignored the two men despite the clear hint of fear in his gaze when he turned to shout at her. None of them could put in a word as he ran off and dragged her again, zigzagging through hallways and unexpecting servants until they reached the cell rooms where they kept Ceara of Eriu.

The first thing that tipped her off that something wasn't right and that Seijin hadn't lost it completely was seeing the detail that guarded both the outside and the antechamber door completely out cold.

The second and much more subtle in her opinion was that at nearing the proximity of the room, Parisa could hear a soft rumbling in her ear. It was bothersome and got her to pick at her ear thinking it was her. It wasn't until they reached the antechamber door and he left her some steps away to open the door with one hand while covering one of his ears with the other that she knew this was indeed worthy of panicking.

"What in the hell?" Parisa's whisper got lost in the hum that rung through her head and the room.

Seijin stepped back, rubbing his ear hard to rid himself of some noise as dread drained his face of color. "Please tell me you know what's happening."

"I…" But there weren't any words she could say to describe what laid before her. Beyond the door, the small cell that Miss of Eriu had been locked up in was completely wrecked. The chair and desk were pulverized at spots, like a blast of something pierced through them and broke them apart. Papers and scrolls were scattered across the floor some moving despite there being no breeze coming in from the outside. The bed, the pillow and sheets were dismantled as if crushed into fine pieces of linen and wood.

What bothered her the most was the horde of rukh that spiraled inside the room like a gleaming storm tinted green that raged over the small figure and curled itself against the wall straight ahead of them.

Parisa only recognized the small ball as Ceara when she began hearing the muttering over the noise the rukh made. The woman that cowered against the wall tucked her legs against her body and held her arms over her head, her lips moving erratically as she muttered incoherencies and kept recoiling at odd times.

 _What in the world…_

"What's happening here?"

Parisa and Seijin both turned about to face the emperor and his brother. She hadn't expected them to follow after them but with the spectacle Seijin had made to bring her here she wasn't surprised either.

Surprisingly still, Seijin actually bothered to answer the emperor's question. "I-I don't know. I found everything like this when I came to visit this morning. She's not well. We have to do something!" His sudden exclaim and the step he took towards that room caught her attention.

But just as she reached out to stop him, another voice called out louder than hers just a split second before the sound of the rukh going berserk reached Parisa's ears.

" **Stay away!"**

Parisa recognized Miss of Eriu's voice but didn't have time to pull Seijin back before the wave of sound spread out and pushed them away, throwing them both off of their feet and just a few feet before the two brothers. Raising their heads, she and Seijin both saw the blue-eyed woman raise her head, those eyes brimming with tears and her hands grasping tightly at her head while the rukh that went mad calmed itself down to a spiral around her again.

Ceara recoiled, hitting the back of her head against the wall and groaning before her muttering started again. In between the rambling, her voice barely came over a whisper. "Don't come near me." Beneath the white of her robes, Parisa caught the gleam of dark green that shone beneath it before the rambling got louder. Doing so deemed the brightness of the mark beneath her clothes but only briefly as she quieted down and was forced to mutter louder.

"My brother and king, that's—"

"Parisa." Hearing her name in such steely tone got her to face Emperor Kouen and Prince Koumei after she and Seijin stood up from their fall. "Can you perform sound magic?"

"Sound magic?"

"Can you?" he repeated with a deeper pitch and an underlying sense of gravity. She nodded as her reply. "Then negate the magic that she's using."

 _What?_

"Magic?" Seijin repeated in disbelief. "But she can't—"

"Do it. Now." The fact that he didn't have to raise his voice much higher yet she still heard the commanding notion in it, told her that this was indeed urgent. Done with dawdling around, she came as close as she could to the threshold until the buzzing in her ears was tolerable before taking out her wand and dealing out a simple command.

The rukh bustled around but seemed to disperse as her magic negated some of whatever was beckoning near Miss of Eriu. The amount that left though was meager and quickly got replaced as more came.

"What?"

"What's wrong?" Seijin asked.

"The rukh—" Decided to undo it, Parisa shook her head. She concentrated and drew her wand around to command the few higher level formulae she knew on sound magic before casting another spell. And although it nullified a larger part of the magic, the rukh quickly returned and reformed the constant spell that was being cast. "The rukh keeps coming back even after I nullify it."

"How?"

"I don't know," she replied to Seijin before turning to look at the two brothers. "I don't know how she's capable of doing this. It's like a high magician's level of casting but…"

 _It's also drawing rukh compatible with sound magic from her surroundings like a magi would._

"Can it be nullified?" the emperor asked.

"I-It keeps regenerating it's source. It'd be impossible—"

"Can it be nullified." That deep tone told her well what was actually being asked. He didn't want to know what couldn't be done. He wanted to know what could be.

"M-Maybe," she corrected herself and thought quickly through the options. "Perhaps if we get a force of sound magic that equals or surpasses that which she's using, we could negate it at a constant enough rate to not let it replenish as fast."

"Theoretically, it should work," Prince Koumei said with a nod after he listened carefully to her. "By balancing the magic's output, it would have nothing to restore and therefore nothing new to create. It could very well stop whatever this field of sound she's posed around her."

"Seijin, go to Kouha and tell him to send as many magicians with such affinity this way." Seijin nodded and didn't bother to wait to be dismissed before he ran off. "Parisa, keep negating this. It appears to lessen her burden."

With a quick 'yes,' Parisa hurried to continue and cast a low level magic that she could keep dispensing without wasting too much magoi. It should last to give Seijin and Prince Kouha enough time to gather the magicians because this level of magic would need a tremendous load of countering magic to even come close to balancing it out.

Parisa really hoped her comrades in Prince Kouha's vanguard were well-versed in sound magic. This would be a heavy load to parry against.

* * *

The first thing Ceara noticed after waking up was the small humming at the back of her head that was rendered almost inaudible like it had been when she first noticed it. Skeptical, Ceara moved her fingers to make certain that her body wasn't in any pain either. But when moving didn't cause those vibrations from before to tear at her muscles, she thanked the heavens.

They were gone. Ceara's relief was high enough to make her want to cry.

"Miss of Eriu?" The small whisper sounded more like her normal voice when Parisa called out her name. Turning her head to face her, Ceara briefly caught the sight of someone running out of the room—even heard the doors as they shut closed behind them—before seeing the girl rise from her sit, concern clearly etched on her face and mirrored in her eyes. "How are you feeling?"

Ceara tried to speak but tasted iron in her throat that came with a hoarseness. Parisa quickly left to come back with a glass of water that Ceara gladly took to drink. The coolness was soothing and washed away the taste of blood from her mouth and throat. Softly thanking her for the drink, Ceara looked around to orient her absent mind. This place wasn't her jail, it was a sickroom. Both were just as bare, though. The sickroom a tad bleaker.

"Why am I here?"

Parisa's brows furrowed in confusion. "You don't recall what happened?"

"A little," Ceara replied, "mostly the pain."

She tapped her mouth with a couple of her fingers before addressing her again. "Tell me about that. When did it start? How bad did it get?"

"Bad." That was the only thing she could vouch to.

It started with that small hum that buzzed in her eardrums and the back of her head. But as the days kept going, she could hear it getting louder and louder until the humming became discernable. They were voices.

At least it started with only voices. Some were happy or excited, some angry or panicked, and, mostly in the beginning, only spoke in whispers—the humming she kept hearing that got a bit clearer, a bit louder. But everything kept going from bad to worse as days, hours—and soon enough—as minutes went by. They got louder, more unruly and vicious, and soon enough hearing those raucous voices colliding so disorderly against one another was what began messing with how her mind perceived the world around her.

Soon the voices took shape. A monstrous amalgamation of faceless strangers torturing her with their screeching words. They interacted with the world without really interacting with it. Like a ghost, they were there but not truly, because no matter how much she hit at them to go away, they would just step aside and cackle in the most grotesque way she'd ever heard. Every noise they made hurt her ears, hurt her mind.

It wasn't until she began shouting at them that she found some sort of reprieve. The more she yelled the more they quieted down, their misshapen body wavering like a mirage. Simply speaking got them to quiet and leave. It was something and she took it. Ceara began muttering to herself about anything and everything. Reciting, singing, humming—practically anything that made sound alleviated the pain in her head.

But by the second day of doing that, Ceara realized that it wasn't the infallible solution she wanted. It took away the pain in her head, yes, but in exchange gave her a new one. The normal vibrations that enabled her to speak were augmented beyond what her body could take. What was once a harmless way to communicate became a damaging storm of vibrations that shredded every inch of her. The more she talked to alleviate the pain in her head, the stronger the vibrations became. They got to the point that the vibrations reached beyond her throat, propagating outward to her body. Soon the pain from her muscles tearing off bit by bit immobilized her against the wall.

If she kept quiet, her mind suffered. If she didn't, her body did.

In the end, she opted for the latter. For once in her life, Ceara thanked Masami. Were it not for her punishments acclimating her body to constant pain, she wouldn't be able to bare how her body was literally destroying itself so that her mind wouldn't.

Even as she told Parisa this, Ceara heard the humming in her ears and felt the soreness of her muscles—their voices prevalent quietly in her brain and the vibrations crawling under her skin as she spoke to the young magician.

The fact that neither one nor the other was overwhelming shocked her after having lived through such horrid experience for the past four days. "But—" Ceara touched her ears, ignoring the hum and focusing on what else she could hear. Nothing out of the ordinary, really. Just what sounded like a million wings fluttering just outside of the room. "Things are quiet right now. Why is that?"

"Probably because of those." Ceara followed Parisa's pointing finger to the far corner of the room where a strange dark crystal stood. It didn't look like much larger than her hand but it was tall, and the inside glimmered an odd bright green almost like a balefire. Eyeing the rest of the room showed her that similar crystals decorated the corners with the same odd glow. "They're helping nullify the magic your casting."

"Magic?"

"When you talk it seems the vibrations release sound magic." Raising her arms, Parisa showed her long cuts that were covered in bandages. "Every time you kept waking up screaming from the pain, anybody in this room would be lashed with it."

Completely in horror and disbelief, Ceara couldn't help but grimace and hold her hand. "I'm so sorry I hurt you."

Parisa didn't take it to heart though and simply shrugged the apology off. "It actually helped to gauge which magic tools would be best to counter the magic you emanate. I'm actually still tweaking through the prototypes since they keep breaking from the overload."

That fact got Ceara thinking about what she said before. "How many times have I woken up before this?"

"Five." The blood drained from her face at the thought of having hurt gods knew how many people with whatever powers lashed out without her even knowing it. "But you weren't really conscious. It was like you're body reacted on its own. Like it knew to forgo your body to safeguard your brain."

 _Smart but still strange._

"And also, if I may." Parisa reached out to Ceara, stopping briefly before she got anywhere close until she got her okay. Nodding, she let her continue and Parisa leaned forward to touch her left shoulder. "This hasn't disappeared all the while you've been in here."

Reaching up herself to lay back part of her robes, Ceara's eyes widened at seeing the seal vibrant and bulging from her skin. The dark jade outline of it felt rigid against her fingers, like thin metal lines jutting from under her skin. Many of the veins around the outline were extended as well as if wrapping onto something living.

Plenty of things that Parisa told her suddenly made sense to Ceara as she eyed the seal that marked the top left side of her chest and shoulder and touching the scar on her throat above her vocal chords. Her afflictions made sense too. The vibrations it caused spread from her throat. The pain in her head went away when she spoke. Casting the magic from Silver Echoes kept her sane but hurt her body.

"It's casting magic without your knowledge."

Hearing Kouen's deep voice rumbling through her body made a shiver run through her. Ceara spotted him alongside Koumei and Seijin who she supposed was the one that she'd seen run off ealier.

"It looks like it." Her eyes wandered as she accommodated her robes back on her shoulder and found Seijin with small bandages also covering various cuts on his arms and face. A grimace came to her as she reached out for him. The blonde boy came up to her bedside beside Parisa and grinned.

"It's not as bad as it looks," he assured her, patting her hand and placing it beside her. "They're all superficial."

"Anybody else?"

"Some. Nothing worse than tiny cuts though."

That they were few didn't garner the same optimism in her as it did in him. Facing Kouen, Ceara tried her best to not avert her gaze from his no matter how much it bore on her. "I didn't know it could cast magic on its own."

"I doubt you knew or cared to ask anything about it."

"Do you know anything?" The question caused his eyes to narrow in annoyance. Ceara hadn't meant for it to, though. She was honestly curious about it. Kouen shook his head, however, and that was enough to tell her that even him who seldom boasted about his broad knowledge knew nothing. It seemed that at the moment only one person in that room knew anything remotely concrete about this thing. "Parisa, can I leave this room at all?"

"I'd suggest not to even try." That did not sound good. "That the crystals are nullifying the magic doesn't mean that it's not casting it anymore. These are only countering the output so that no new magic is created. It won't hurt so long as—damn, Miss your nose."

Ceara's eyes widened at her call and felt a warm something sliding down her upper lip. Touching it, she got one look at the blood that'd come out of her nose before wiping at it. "It's from talking," she assured them, cleaning herself with the wet towel Seijin gave her. "The vibrations are there still. I can feel them." Without any warning, she forced herself to cough, spitting anything in her mouth out only to see the reddish pink that mixed with her saliva. "They're not as strong but looks like they're still causing internal damage."

It was Kouen then that asked, "What did Rakah tell you about the seals?"

"Nothing much. I don't think he wanted me to know anything either. But I can guess plenty from what I saw him do and what's happening right now."

The obvious was that it casted magic. Not only that but how it did also baffled her. The other obvious thing was that it came at a great toll both mentally and physically. That last bit made her wonder if Rakah also suffered something similar whenever he did and didn't use his. No matter how many times she recalled him, nothing came to Ceara's mind about the seals in particular.

Her train of thought quickly shifted when a sharp pain struck the side of her head followed by the voices raising in volume inside her head. As they got louder, she held her head, gritting her teeth as the pain increased.

 _W-What? But I thought—_

A loud crack echoed in the room at that instant before it burst into pieces. Parisa cursed loudly, swiping her wand out to cast magic. "Sei, take them out of here before the others break too."

"I'm not—"

"Do as she says," Ceara groaned through her gritted teeth not knowing or caring who had spoken. "I can't control it. So please, leave before you get hurt."

"What is this?"

A sweet voice she hadn't heard in ages flowed into her ears but was quickly drowned out when the voices exploded in her head along with the remaining crystals in the room. Ceara wanted to scream but refrained by biting down on her tongue. If she screamed to relieve the pain in her head, she would hurt them. That wasn't going to happen again.

A small gentle hand fell on her arm, the touch soothing. The feeling suddenly spread and shut the voices up at once, making her heave a deep sigh of relief. Opening her eyes, Ceara met with a pair of royal blue eyes and a smile that was just as gentle, albeit small and somewhat bleak, as his touch was.

"Does it help?" Aladdin asked as quietly as he could.

Ceara didn't answer. She just lowered her hands from her head but never tearing her eyes away from the young magi. The little boy had somewhat sunken eyes, leftover streaks of tears still visible, and his black garments impregnated with the heavy scent of incense. Ceara only knew of one thing that could have left him like that. She herself had been to two. And the fact that she recognized it only brought a heaviness to her as she forced herself out of the bed to sit at the edge and pull Aladdin into her arms to hold him tightly.

There were plenty of things she wanted to tell him. Ceara wanted to tell him that things would be all right, that it was okay to be sad, that it wasn't his fault. But she refrained from that and instead held him.

 _He's just a boy._

And he didn't deserve this—none of them did.

Aladdin's tiny hands shook but wrapped around her for a small squeeze before pulling back, his head hanging low as he turned to Parisa. "You can't have her like this."

"She's a criminal," Koumei answered him instead. "The fact that she's even allowed in the infirmary for such intensive care—"

"I don't mean that." The little boy wiped at his face before lifting it, his expression still somewhat empty, to address Koumei before turning to Parisa. "Restricting the flow won't work."

"There has to be a way," Parisa replied fervently, "We can't just let the rukh flux into her body so uncontrollably. There has to be a way to stop it."

"There isn't." Ceara's brow furrowed at hearing the definitiveness in his answer. "What you're trying to do is stop all source of sound magic from returning to the world. You cannot do that for long without destroying her in the process."

"Then…" she whispered, cautious now that there were no more nullifying crystals in the room, but noticed that whatever Aladdin was casting was doing something to ameliorate the damage. "What _can_ we do, Aladdin?"

"Build something that doesn't stop the flow but instead helps you withstand its passing." When voices rose up to protest or question, he went forward with a more detailed explanation.

"The seal turned your body into a channel for the rukh." Leaning his staff against his shoulder, Aladdin pushed his hands together and left a slit open between them. "The rukh flows in a singular direction—whether it's here or in Alma Toran, it followed the direction 'fate' predicted for it. Before magic or magicians or even any life came to be, the world created by Ill Ilah was given its vitality via the gifts it bestowed upon the world. Later, the essence of those same gifts was bestowed upon the humans as magic. These seals work as valves and filters for the flow of rukh." He bend a finger from each hand to cover the middle slit but still leaving them some space. "Their job is to keep rukh flowing in that singular direction like a one-way valve. The moment an opposing flow comes along it shuts and helps filter what causes the backflow so that it eventually reverts it back to normal."

"This opposing flow you speak of," Kouen asked coming closer and crossing his arms in front of his chest as he listened. "Is it the black rukh from those fallen into depravity?"

"In part but only because it contradicts the flow that Solomon established," Aladdin acknowledged. "Like I said, the job of the seals is to keep the flow moving in one direction. Whether it be white or black rukh wouldn't matter so long as they both flow the same way."

"What is the point of them if they can't correct what is wrong?" Koumei inquired not understanding.

"That was never their original purpose. Their purpose was to keep the world and every living being moving forward no matter what reigned over it. It controls a fraction of rukh that makes up the Great Flow, but even that fraction is huge. It can cause great damage if left unchecked, especially considering that it's going through a human's body that has a finite capacity for it."

"Such a load," Seijin said aloud. "Wouldn't that kind of burden kill anybody?"

"It would." Aladdin averted his eyes then, an odd look on his face.

Ceara saw that as very strange. If this was enough to kill a single person then why would it be bestowed to one? All of a sudden her mind recalled something that Seijin had talked about before when he told her what had happened at the summit meeting. Something that Rakah had said to them.

"They were stolen." Aladdin lifted his face to meet her eyes when Ceara said that. "Rakah said that these 'gifts'—" her hand unconsciously reached up to her shoulder— "were stolen. That he was retrieving them to stop the abnormalities and darkness of the world. Is that true?"

The little magi pursed his lips as if pondering his answer. "I don't know if he was telling the truth about his intentions but he did tell the truth about the seals. The original gifts were stolen from Alma Toran and given to this world when it was created . They have existed here in an unnatural state, though. They went from their natural existence at the core of the world to tiny, scattered ones in human beings."

"So tiny that the sheer overwhelming number of rukh pummels through and bypasses them altogether," Ceara said understanding what he said.

Aladdin nodded in agreement. "The rukh passes through the seal still but it's not filtered or controlled. It rushes through your body and the excess without control is very damaging."

Ceara knew that. Not only from the previous experience but also from Murmur's magic. Siphoning too much magoi hurt her body to the point where it almost shut down completely during the battle in Magnostadt. In a way, she understood how the two were similar.

Nullifying stops the flow and confines it, overloading her mind. Letting it flow freely released that tension but like any channel or duct it wore down her body from the fast and heavy flow.

"That's why easing its passage through is the best you can do," Aladdin concluded but grimaced at some bitter thought.

Ceara was almost sure she knew what it was. "It's all we can do."

A quiet came over the room as the thought lingered in her mind. Surely, he knew what Ceara had surmised from all that information. "I'm sorry."

 _He did._ A small smile came to her lips at that apology before she shook her head and reached out to take his hands in her own. "It's all right. What you're telling us helps plenty; you've done more than enough. Don't beat yourself up over something no one could help."

It seemed the meaning of her words stuck to him as the small grimace simply became a flat line completely void of any expression.

There wasn't much of anything to talk about after that. Aladdin talked to Parisa briefly, his expression just as lost, before leaving. Worried about him, Ceara asked Seijin to accompany him for awhile. Although dubious about the request, he adhered after making Parisa promise that she'd let him know if anything else changed. Parisa hurried instead to cast some magic on the broken pieces of crystal. She said it was something different, some formulae that used what Aladdin had suggested as basis to ease the travel of the rukh through her. It would take some time to figure out but Parisa promised she'd get it done. Ceara didn't doubt she would.

"At least now there is some direction to go on."

Ceara's eyes lingered on Kouen when he spoke. Despite having stayed behind, Koumei busied himself with the detail that was to be placed at her sickroom at all times and paid little attention to his brother. Ceara had paid what necessary attention she had to him. Nothing more than that, though.

"It'll keep me alive long enough to send me off to battle."

His eyes fell to meet hers and despite initially diverting hers, Ceara opted not to look away anymore. "What makes you think I'll send you to battle like this?"

"I would think you foolish if you didn't. And I know for a fact you aren't. Not doing it, would give those who doubt more reason to." She didn't understand why he was saying such a ridiculous thing. Certainly Kouen knew better than anyone that if he didn't comply with his word of using her for this war, then the people would question his motives for keeping her alive. That was something that Ceara began to do at that question, no matter how rhetorical it might have been. "Whatever it is you have in mind for me, though, I'm sure it's fine. It'll quell what anxiety the people have and vest even more of their faith in you. Frankly, that's all you need for this war."

"I have their loyalty as does the Kou Empire," he replied sternly. "However, this war will be won with more than just numbers. It needs strategy, contingencies, prowess."

"Things I'm sure you and Koumei have already checked thrice for." An irritating sensation caught onto her throat but the more she cleared it, the more pronounced it became. _Blood._ It tasted like it anyway. Ceara reached over for the glass of water Parisa had left her but Kouen got to it first, passing it on to her. With a small 'thank you,' Ceara drank from the glass until the lump in her throat went down. As she drew back, she noted the slight pink color left in the tiny bits of water left in the glass. _Definitely blood._

"All the same, though, I'm also certain that you won't risk anything. You'll use every asset at your disposal, including prisoners like myself. In all honesty, you can rest assured that I'll fight wholeheartedly. You may want to reclaim your empire back but all I want is for those trapped there to be returned safely to their loved ones."

"That includes yours."

"Never said it didn't," she quickly retorted. "As things stand now though all I have left to give is my power to fight. But you and I know that's not something that will last long. Not after what Aladdin told us."

 _Or more what he didn't even dare say._ The poor thing had already suffered the death of a loved one. Now, in spite of not a word being said, Ceara knew what this seal would eventually do to her.

"There must be ways to prolong it," Kouen told her with a long sigh. Glancing over his shoulder, he and Ceara caught the glimpse of Koumei finishing and returning to his side. "Parisa will have access to all the resources she needs. This will be mended."

 _For how long?_ But Ceara restrained from voicing that question. "And once it is, I'm going to that front line," Ceara said with all the confidence in the world.

Kouen's expression didn't change nor falter. Neither did he reply. Despite his avoidance, Ceara knew just by the circumstances their country was in that he wouldn't forgo anything to win this war.

 _He never said he wouldn't send me after all._

When he didn't answer, Koumei saw it fit to put the whole argument to rest. "All troops will leave for the western borders of the Tenzen Plateau in two days' time. You will be taken there by Chuu'un the morning we depart and will be under Kouha's command at the vanguard." She gave a curt nod as her answer.

"And my metal vessels?"

This time Kouen seemed to find the voice he restrained. "They will be given to you before the battle begins. Not a moment sooner."

Precautions. Fair enough. So long as she had them to fight, she wouldn't complain. That explanation, as lacking of details as it had been, seemed to be all they would give her. It annoyed Ceara to be in the dark like that but she would have to deal. The two left pretty quickly after, leaving her heavily guarded on the outside and alone in the inside.

Although Ceara felt tired, she didn't want to sleep. Didn't feel like it would help much anyway. Instead she did her best to get out of bed to at least clean herself off with a cloth and some water. Whatever happened when she was out had left her drenched in sweat, her body seemingly overexerting on its own. Thankfully, there wasn't much pain now. At least none that felt as harrowing as the one she felt over those last four days.

The humming was still there. The vibrations were still there. But they were calm as hard to believe as that was. Whatever Aladdin and Parisa had done made it easier to bear with. But that was all Ceara was doing, bearing. And it looked like from this point onward that was all she would be able to do.

In two days the military along with her would leave. She would have to bear the scrutiny and scorn from soldiers she had once commanded. Be relegated to a mere tool for this war. But as far as she was concerned, it would be fine. So long as she could fight, Ceara was fine with it all. If she endured years of disdain and ridicule, then she could bear a few days of that in battle. And she would do it, all to restore the empire she grew up in and for the family she loved.

* * *

"You built these in a day?"

Parisa nodded, relishing in the praise that came from Ceara's astonishment. "I know, I know. I'm amazing." Scooting closer to the table where the three of them—Ceara, Seijin, and Parisa—were just finishing eating breakfast, the young magician grinned with pride at her work that now rested on Ceara's left wrist.

"Toot your own horn why don't you," Seijin cajoled with a smirk that got Parisa to pout.

Shaking it out of her system, Parisa turned her attention to Ceara as she played around with the heavy bangle. "It's made of the same crystal from before. Aladdin was nice enough to help me figure out the formulae I needed to make it function properly."

If it functioned properly or not, Ceara couldn't very well tell. Everything still sounded and felt the same as yesterday, just quietly resting at the back of her mind and under her skin.

"So how does it work?"

That question alone perked the magician girl right up as she scooted further up, accidentally tumbling with the table and getting Seijin annoyed as he quickly caught and stabilized it. Parisa didn't care though, and instead reached to take her wrist and the bangle in her hand. Ceara called it a bangle but it felt more like a manacle from how tight the crystal was around her wrist.

"It's made of clear quartz like the crystals from before. It's easier to channel magic with them but is still sturdy so it's perfect for this."

"Not to mention valuable." Seijin chuckled as he laid back against his chair. "The researchers Prince Koumei introduced us to for this were so mad that we had to use so much of it that I had to keep myself from bursting out laughing right then and there."

Ceara hummed her agreement. Kouen hadn't been kidding when he said no expense would be spared to fixing what was wrong. Well, 'fixing' in the relative term that was.

"Anyway," Parisa interjected clearly peeved about being interrupted. "These runes are what Aladdin and I worked on and what is making it work. It's basically running as a second filter, one that focuses more on you than the rukh. It helps rid the excess magoi of your body by helping the filtration along."

"So you made the valve larger?" she asked.

"Not exactly. What we did was more along the lines of improving the process that's already happening."

Ceara watched the crystal manacle on her wrist that despite being called a clear quartz was anything but. Inside the inch thick bangle, tiny specks of green darted in and out of view, like tiny flares going on and off and swirling around inside the bracelet.

Taking a bite of an apple he grabbed, Seijin gulped it down before motioning out at Parisa. "What if it breaks like the others?"

"It won't," she assured them both. "The reason the others broke was because they were trying to contain an insurmountable amount of rukh. From what Aladdin told me, it was like trying to dam the ocean."

 _Pointless as it sounds, I'm sure._

"So instead of building a dam, we focused on a more effective container. Every human has different capacities of how much magoi they can retain in their bodies so we based the magic on that. The simple fact that Miss of Eriu is a multiple metal vessel user actually made this much more feasible."

"It did?" she asked a bit curious about that.

Parisa nodded as she took a sip of water before answering. "You have a larger reservoir of magoi than what's considered normal—it gave me a bigger container to work with. The bracelet not only feeds on the magoi that comes in but on the magoi that your body naturally restores to itself."

"I thought you were trying to fix this. Isn't that detrimental?" Seijin pointed out with a scowl on his face.

"Not entirely." Parisa drank all her water before placing the cup in the middle of the table and filling it up close to two thirds full with wine. "Normally magoi never really restores itself completely. There's always a gap that remains empty. This keeps the body from being too full because too much magoi harms the body just like too little does." Taking the jug of water, she poured the cup up to the brim, the liquids dangerously close to overflowing. "From what I can tell, the seal makes that gap nonexistent and keeps pouring even after that threshold is reached. This essentially breaches through the capacity of the body and can account for why your mind suffers if you don't use it. Much like blood, magoi is a lifesource connected to our vital organs: the heart and the brain."

"Why does my body hurt when I do use it then?" Ceara asked.

"Because the magoi that comes into your body from the outside is too raw. It's not as refined or attuned to your body as your own is. It's the same reason why metal vessels like Beleth's that use sound magic seem to be much stronger when using this rukh and magoi. It's rawer power."

Parisa carefully took the cup into her hands and raised it to her lips to drink a good amount out of it effectively emptying the cup of most of its wine and water, only leaving a little bit behind. "What the bracelet is doing is using both the magoi that's entering and the magoi that's already there as its energy source to ease passage of the rukh through. Primarily, it siphons off of your own but once it reaches a certain level it begins to siphon out of the magoi coming from the seal. Keeping your magoi at low levels allows for more excess from the outside to pour in for longer periods of time without causing too much damage. It'll allow the rukh to filter through the seal without jeopardizing much." Reaching for the jug of water once more, Parisa filled the cup with water, the liquid in the cup turning a clear crimson from the diluted wine. "There is a problem though. The seal causes the rukh to have a much higher rate of influx; it'll fill you to capacity faster than compared to your own magoi."

Parisa grimaced as she said this, her head hanging low. "It's the one thing we couldn't find a solution to. Your body needs to renew its magoi constantly because of the bracelet but because the foreign magoi innately refills it at much higher rates, it won't give it time. You can't live out of that raw magoi without harming yourself and you can't survive with low reserves of your own magoi either. So in order to allow some space and time for it restore itself, you have to make that space."

"You mean I have to use it."

Parisa's grimaced turned larger as she nodded. "Constantly."

Ceara pondered over that. To live through this, she would have to use that magic, something that happened merely by talking. But at the same time, it augmented the vibrations that harmed her body. _But I can deal with that._

"It's fine, Risa," Ceara assured her with a smile, reaching out to squeeze the girl's hand. "You did wonderfully."

It helped at least to make her smile grimly. "Aladdin helped tons. It's really him you have to thank."

"I have all of you to thank." Ceara corrected her, reaching over to both their hands. "You've done far more for me than I would have ever hoped for. More than I ever would have expected, really."

Parisa shrugged her shoulders but didn't take her hand away either as she smiled. "You can do stupid things but it's easy to tell you mean good."

"Obvious if one cares to look closely," Seijin added with nod of his head. "You may be hasty and sometimes unreasonable but those things are fixable. We people learn from our mistakes, right?"

"We do," she agreed.

Despite how much Ceara found it hard to admit, that was a lesson that proved hardest to learn for her. Many people before told her that mistakes along with defeat were meant to be learned from. After all this, Ceara knew her strengths, she knew her weaknesses. Some overwhelmed the others but overall she could count them easily. That she would only have this last day to work on them reminded her of how short her unusual freedom was.

But the biggest problem stayed the same. If she controlled her emotions and allowed herself to think things thoroughly at every step, then she could very well be useful on this war. Ceara had worked a year to do it but had always felt a rogue part of her denying that such thing needed to be controlled.

There's no problem with it, it would say; there's no problem with you.

But there was. And it was about time to see to it.

Dismissing the two for the rest of the day, Ceara took what was left of it herself to calm herself from the anxiety that still plagued her. She couldn't let herself be distracted by the thought of Sou or Sui being injured or in danger. No matter how much it pained her to do it, Ceara had to set that aside for now and concentrate on what would become of herself and others in mere hours.

All troops would leave Balbadd in a few hours. She and Parisa under Koumei's vanguard; Seijin accompanying Kougyoku's troops. They would fight, certainly lose soldiers, but in the end they would retrieve their capital and their empire.

Hakuryuu would fall and with him all would end. The thought saddened her but that was something that also had to be set aside for this to work—for her to be able to fight the boy she had befriended. He was no longer that boy. The man that they would soon fight was not that boy. Hakuryuu was but a man who'd shown to sacrifice his own people for what he thought was right.

 _Wouldn't we all…_

As night came, Ceara found it hard to conceive any sleep. Instead as the late hours of the night went by, she found herself simply flipping through the pages of the bound journal that Seijin had given her, only mildly damaged from the mess she'd caused in her jailroom. There wasn't anything really for her to write anymore; she'd made her piece with each letter she wrote the few days before.

Now all she had left was a mindless night ahead of her. On occasion, Ceara heard the flutter of the rukh around the room that grew lighter after the crystals and manacle had been put in place. Sitting on her bed, she raised her left hand above her head and watched the crystal give off a small glow by itself, one that matched faintly the dark jade of the seal that marked her body.

Ceara hummed under her breath, feeling at ease making the soft sound and mildly lifting her mind's heaviness at doing so. Words would escape her lips from time to time, the senseless words lifting into the air and gently stirring the air around her. It was hard for Ceara not to notice it now. It was actually hard for her not to notice anything anymore. Her hearing had gone beyond what she considered 'normal' for her; at this point, she could practically hear any and every sound no matter how soft or nuanced it might be. She could hear the faintest of scurrying from animals or the slight breathing of the maids and servants that slept soundly in their quarters almost a whole courtyard away.

And she could also hear the soft steps from outside her sickroom that interrupted the small flutter that filled the room. Ceara looked over her shoulder before the door opened and she was met with a much unexpected sight.

"Chuu'un?"

Koumei's household member gave a curt nod before motioning for her to come closer. Suspicious but wanting to know what it was all about, Ceara stood from the seat on her bed and cut the distance between them. She took a peek over his shoulder and saw the detail deeply asleep but somehow still standing.

 _Wait.,,did I do that?_

Chuu'un didn't bother asking and neither did he seem to take concern with what she thought of him because of it. Instead he motioned for her hands, a gesture Ceara knew was for her to give them so they could be tied. Ceara was reluctant since he still had yet to say a word—she knew little about him but if she knew anything solid, it was that Koumei's household member, like his master, was a man of few words.

Opting for the best, Ceara raised her hands for Chuu'un to do quick work of them, tying them tightly with rope before taking her out of the sickroom. Neither spoke to one another as he led her away. There wasn't much she had to talk to him about anyway, so instead Ceara chose to inspect her surroundings.

The East Wing of the palace was practically empty. It was very late into the night and seldom did she hear another soul awake in their proximity. If anything, the noises she did hear were of nocturnal animals going about their routine. But as Chuu'un stopped in front of a very familiar room, Ceara had to stop herself to process why exactly they were there.

 _Kouen's quarters?_

"What is this?"

The household member refrained from replying, though. She was about to ask again when nearby footsteps caught her attention and got her to face the doors a split second before they opened. Dressed in what seemed comfortable robes, Kouen eyed Ceara for a small instant before facing Chuu'un.

"Your majesty, as per your request," Chuu'un said with a curt bow and salute.

"If she isn't in the sickroom by morning, retrieve her from here for your departure."

Kouen's orders were clear from the nod that the household member gave him. With that Kouen dismissed him and took the end of the ropes that tied her wrists together from Chuu'un before he left. Ceara didn't comprehend what was happening but followed Kouen inside all the same. The moment she entered, the fact that his antechambers were so brightly lit caught her off guard. The tables were littered with scrolls and papers, surely from the workload he still had to do. But aside from them, Ceara caught the sight of the world map, one she had ingrained into her brain after so many lessons with Koumei on strategy. This map was written on, though, marks of ink dirtying some spots of it and the table beneath.

For a man that was usually so well organized in both his public and private lives, Kouen certainly appeared to have a disorderly side to him. From the looks of it, one that got triggered by loads of stress. And calmed with doses of alcohol. That last guess came from the bottle that sat next to the mountain of work and an empty cup.

"Troubles?" she asked as he turned to undo the knots of her restraints. There wasn't an answer or a second glance, he simply continued his task until he was done, laying the piece of rope aside on the nearest chair.

"Sit."

"I'd rather not." That brief yet terse objection got his attention. Ceara didn't falter even with the bleak glare that he gave her. Trying to keep things civil, she shrugged her shoulders. "Thank you anyway."

"Then stand." Kouen returned to his armchair where he started looking into the scrolls and map simultaneously. "For what I want you, your presence is more than enough."

"And what would that be?"

He didn't answer and instead stayed on task. Ceara watched for a few minutes before deciding that perhaps she'd take that seat after all. If he was just going to have her here as a token, then she might as well act like one. Taking the chair to the side of the table, Ceara tucked her legs in against her body and eyed the papers laid on the table.

Announcements from the public. Soldier records: human, dungeon creatures, and magicians. Past battle strategies. Armory counts.

All but the history he so loved. It didn't surprise Ceara that much though. They were heading to the warfront on the morrow. Everything needed to be accounted for.

"Are the citizens supplied with sufficient rations?" she asked, reading the numbers on the few about public information. Kouen gave her a peeved glance for a brief second but didn't give her an answer. It didn't deter her from continuing her questions. "What about those bordering the plateau; have they been evacuated? Koumei and you distributed the troops, I'm assuming. Will they be properly armed for the strategies? I mean, I see by just skimming that there's maybe about twenty contingencies; so have they been assigned accordingly for ea—"

"Yes, they have the normal numbers and emergency rations as per protocol. Yes, they were evacuated days ago. Yes, they will be and yes, they have." Kouen took a deep sigh to calm himself before lowering the scroll he held and met her eyes with a steel gaze. "Are you done?"

"Hardly." Ceara narrowed her eyes before sighing to herself. "But I'll stop asking nonsensical questions if you tell me why Chuu'un brought me here."

"That's inconsequential."

"Not to me." But it didn't do much to convince him. His silence made it clear to Ceara that he wasn't going to play along with her inquisition. At least not this particular one. So instead she opted for another. "Why haven't you given the order for imperial punishment against me?"

Despite not giving a reply, Kouen lifted his gaze to meet hers. Once their eyes locked, neither looked away from the other. Even when she asked that Kouen did not flinch or avert his gaze. There wasn't a sign of mild irritation or resignation like what her previous questions had gotten out of him. This time he was truly his old nonchalant self when he replied.

"I promise I wouldn't."

"That was when you pardoned a child's crime," Ceara corrected with a frown, puzzled at his answer. "And I've come to accept that. But I can't believe for a second that the man I know would forgo his people what is right by them because of a promise he made."

Kouen scoffed at hearing that. "Then you do not know him as well as you thought."

"Belligerence doesn't become you."

That got him to raise an eyebrow at being called out like so. "Belligerence would imply that I'm addressing this matter aggressively. That, I assure you, I am not. It's mere logic."

 _Is it?_ That new doubtful part of her—one borne out of her own belligerence after running out to Rakushou—surfaced after realizing how made up her mind was. Despite doubting herself though, Ceara doubted his so-called logic much more. This was a smokescreen.

"Then prove it." Ceara motioned her hand out, wanting to lay everything out in the open. "Tell me why I'm here. What's your logical answer?"

"Company."

Ceara's frown got deeper but that didn't make Kouen explain himself further. But as she sat there watching him work as if nothing, she came to understand the one word he'd used. This wasn't his study or a library but the ambience felt the same somehow. The larger space of his antechamber that had seemed so vacant when she entered filled with a peacefulness the longer she was there. It reminded Ceara of what she felt when she ran away to any library or study. But now it wasn't just an empty place that made her feel that way; it was a person.

 _He gives me that peace._

It made Ceara wonder if that was the same for him. And if so, it made her want to preserve that serenity, especially in these times of stress for both of them.

Ceara rose from her seat and walked over to his chair. There wasn't any room for her to seat but for what she wanted to try, she only needed proximity. Deciding that a cushion was better than the hard floor, Ceara took one from the nearby lounge and sat on it with her back against the side of his armchair.

"What are—"

"Don't talk. Just listen," she whispered, hanging her head back as she began humming at the back of her throat.

Ceara felt the magoi in her body starting to pile up even after so much drainage. And what's more she noticed how weary it made her body, like she was just a night's sleep short from recovering but never quite reaching that point. At least talking used the stocked up magoi which was easy to do. And in spite of what she thought, the old childhood habit of humming or singing to herself returned now that this inconvenience had surfaced.

That reminder brought a bleaker one to mind.

"I'm glad I get to fight in this war," Ceara said under her breath as she stared at the ceiling, briefly stopping her humming between sentences. "At least I can fight before this thing does me in."

"You're not going to die."

Ceara contorted herself to look behind her but Kouen hadn't lifted his gaze from his work. It told her that he didn't want to talk about this. But she wasn't going to ignore the obvious and wasn't going to let him blind himself to it either.

"You didn't hear what Parisa—"

"Both Parisa and Seijin informed me exactly what that circlet does and what they uncovered about that seal on your shoulder," he interrupted, his voice terse. "From that, it is true that it will shorten your life but you won't die in the span of days. Stop exaggerating."

 _Exaggerating?_

"I'm not." Ceara bit back her lip as she felt the bitter sting at the corner of her eyes as that thought finally sunk into her head. "I took this thing in without knowing what that implied and I'm paying the consequences for that. I feel it under my skin and in my head—incessant voices speaking, constant pain barraging my body—but I know this is the bed I've set to lay. And what Parisa and Aladdin did for me is incredible but still…the thought of dyi—" her voice cracked on the word, dread hanging on it heavy as lead. Sniffling, she wiped away at her face wanting to rid herself of any tears that had begun to gather.

This morbid recognition of mortality had hit her plenty of times before anytime the Southern Armies under her command would go into battle. Even though those times had been few and far between, that fear had made itself known and like an airborne sickness had spread across fields and soldiers. Their only saving grace was that it left as soon as they brought safety back and their peace of mind along with it.

This, though, was constantly there, reminding her of her choice. Reminding her that what she had chosen wasn't a gift. It was a burden.

There wasn't any doubt that death would take them all—death is what defined the living after all. The only difference between Ceara and all the others was that she couldn't forget about it. There would be nothing that would make her overlook what would eventually come. And she chose to always have that reminder present in her mind.

 _But just because I accept it as fact, it doesn't mean that the thought of dying doesn't scare me._

Shuffling caught her ear but Ceara didn't turn to look. Instead, she stiffened at the warm touch of his hand as it laid atop her left shoulder from over the armrest. Ceara brought her legs closer to herself, her hands hiding her face as she tried her hardest to keep herself from sobbing, and curled up against herself, finding the small act thoughtful.

Kouen didn't say a word but she didn't want any. That he lended a hand was enough for Ceara. The mere gesture gave her the small reassurance she needed. It told her that in spite of everything, and even if a little, Kouen might still care about her. And that simple possibility made her finally cry as she took her hands away from her face to take the hand that he'd laid on her. Her smaller fingers twined between his larger ones, the warmth from his palm reaching her cold hands.

"Don't—" But Kouen heaved a long sigh when he noticed he couldn't stop what already started.

Even if Ceara wanted to too, there wasn't anyway to stop herself now. So much was going on— things she couldn't possibly control that disheartened and saddened her—that keeping herself from crying proved impossible. She had already snapped before, making things all the worse. But it felt like a miracle that someone she never expected to still treat her kindly did so.

Now it was Kouen who had to contort himself as he went over from his seat to help her stand and sit on the lounge. Ceara held tightly to his hand with both of hers even with the tears that rolled down her cheeks, the falling drops spotting her lap.

Through them, she barely saw him reach up with his hand, taking one side of her face into his palm and brushing away the tears. "It's all right to be afraid." Ceara blinked her bleary eyes to focus it, his crimson eyes tinted in gold coming more into focus as well as he said those words. "It's normal to be. Especially when what you fear is something as inevitable as that. But you can't let it take a hold of you and stop you. Use it instead to keep walking forward."

 _I've heard this before...somewhere._

Before she recalled from where, Ceara's mind won her to it and said the rest. "Because in the end...I'm the one who's creating that fear and stopping myself."

What looked like a faint smile to her reached his lips as he nodded. "This may be as inevitable as you fear it to be but you can't let that make you live in fear forever. You're far stronger than that and we both know it. Instead use it as incentive. If your life is shorter, then live it to its fullest."

That brought some far overdue hope to her mind and heart. It even made her smile through her tears. "...I can do that."

"I know you can," he replied, his thumb brushing against her cheek, drying it off of the last tears that came from the corner of her eyes.

"But...not in Kou." Ceara hadn't noticed she had said that aloud until Kouen asked what she meant. Hating she'd let that slip but knowing he wouldn't let it go without an explanation, Ceara decided to humor him. "Everybody here knows the truth. I cannot live freely in a country where I'm a traitor."

"That is mendable," Kouen told her as he took back his hand from her face but left his other when she wouldn't let go. "Once the war ends, you'll have served your purpose. Showing your devotion for this country by having served in this civil war should be enough to at least warrant a pardon."

"Maybe," Ceara said with a small perk of her lips on one side, "but even if you somehow manage to grant an imperial pardon, the people won't easily forget and forgive. No matter how or who pardons me, I've already been found guilty by some." A disheartened chuckle escaped her then at the thought that came over her. "And I don't think I can live the rest of my life hated like I have the past thirteen. Not after knowing what it's like to be accepted for being me again."

Even if she could live in Kou after being pardoned, Ceara would never be able to live the life she wanted to or could possibly live with so many people hating her so. No, that wasn't a life she wanted to live but she didn't want to be forever imprisoned either. Not when there were so many that still needed help, not when there were so many she loved and didn't want to leave behind.

 _I can't have it both ways, though._

Either she lived and everybody she knew hated her, or she was kept behind bars unable to do anything to help anybody again.

 _There is one other option._ It wasn't one she particularly liked even when it granted her those impossibilities together though. It was the best choice for everybody, including herself...even it pained her that such option was the only the be considered 'best.' But as the idea solidified in her mind, Ceara felt regret surface in her mind. Lies had already harmed her relationships with the people she loved. She wasn't about to let that happen again.

"You said I'd have Beleth, Marbas, and Murmur for the war, didn't you?"

"Yes," he replied, his brow furrowing at her odd question. "Why do you ask?"

Her lips parted to tell but stopped halfway as another thought came to her. If Kouen knew, he could end up liable for whatever she did. Knowing him, he would lie if he had to. She didn't want him to carry those lies on his back. Not when he already carried much heavier burdens.

 _I don't need to explicitly tell him though. He's smart enough to figure it out on his own._

Just enough clues would be enough. Just enough to give her time to do this and not be enough for him to figure enough in time.

Ceara shook her head and smiled sincerely instead. "Just making sure that I'll be ready." Hanging her head, Ceara's gaze fell on his hand which she still held in her own, her grip tightening as she gambled on the nuance she gave. "People will die, won't they?"

"It's war," he reminded her, his tone nonchalant, almost sounding like he was meticulously listening to her every word. "Casualties are bound to happen."

She hummed in agreement. "Then it'd be sad but normal...if anybody we knew personally died, wouldn't it?"

"What are you—"

"All I'm saying—" Ceara quickly said, interrupting him and lifting her gaze to meet his as she smiled, "—is that it'll be okay then. Even if that were to happen, we always remember those who leave. At least I know I would."

Finally letting go of his hand, Ceara stood and walked over to the scrolls Kouen had been reading to skim them over. They were plans on how the soldiers would be distributed and it matched perfectly with the markings on the map. Hakuei would take the north, Koumei as their new General Commander would front the western headquarters with Kougyoku and Kouha manning the vanguard towards Rakushou. And from Balbadd, Kouen would command them all as their emperor.

"You and Koumei definitely have everything under control. Whatever may happen, I'm sure you will reign—" Her words stopped in her throat when Ceara turned to meet Kouen as he stood in front of her, his gaze of pure steel not wavering from her own.

"Tell me what it is you're planning," he demanded.

Ceara kept her gentle smile, stepping back as she did so. "Nothing. All I will do is fight with everything I have so that the west faction of Kou wins."

"And after that?"

"Kou will prosper once more and you will continue with the unification of this world," she added. "Nothing more, nothing less."

"What about you?"

Her smiled stayed but she felt her resolve waver. "I'll do as so many have taught me to do: I will live the rest of my life how I want to live it, however short it may be."

Hearing this, Kouen's eyes narrowed before he dared say what she didn't want to speak aloud. "And it won't be in Kou."

The fact that it hadn't even been asked made it clear to Ceara that Kouen figured it out like she had wanted, just too early. But she couldn't very well agree to that and leave him with the liability of her escape after the war.

 _So one more white lie won't hurt._

After all, Kouen would never jeopardize his country over this. Even if he figured it out— _he surely has already—_ he won't stop her. Not when what she intended to do would yield the best outcome for him as emperor and for her as a little lamb with no real place to belong anymore.

"Of course it will," she replied with the same smile. "After all, you all are here. And I would never leave behind the people I love."

Kouen sighed heavily at this but didn't question any further. Instead, he grabbed her wrist in his hand to pull her forth and before she could stop herself or him, Ceara felt the softness of his lips against hers.

Despite the suddenness, she couldn't help but sigh blissfully as his hands came to the small of her back, pressing her flush against him. The kiss was tender yet felt like it had some sense of urgency in it. In wasn't until they parted that she knew why.

"I hate this vague secrecy you think is so clever," he whispered, his breath tickling her lips. "If you plan to run away, then just say so."

Ceara's eyes widened a mere second before they went back to normal and she tried pulling back from him. "I'm not—"

"I will help you if that is what you intend to do." The offer shocked her more than his on point accusation and it caught her tongue enough for him to continue. "After this war is done with, even without your powers, the unification of the world will continue. Once it is complete, you will be found again but by then nothing from the past will matter anymore. You will return to be a citizen of Kou when that time comes."

Breaking herself out of the stupor, Ceara shook her head and locked her gaze with his, their face mere inches from one another. "That's putting a lot of faith in a future that's still uncertain."

"It is no different from what you are doing," he retorted. "After all, if I'm thinking about this correctly, you will most likely escape after everything is done through the fog of war further east." Another thought appeared to come to him as he slightly tilted his head sideways. "The Eastern Isles?"

"They're part of Kou's territory," she reminded him.

"Then Kina," he said pensively. "You're wagering on the Seven Seas Alliance taking you in? I thought you despised King Sinbad."

"I don't particularly despise him per say. I've never formerly met the man, after all. The fact of the matter is that I don't like his way of dealing with things."

"Which makes me wonder all the same why you would even consider seeking refuge in an alliance he reigns over."

"From what I've heard, out of the kingdoms and nations that comprise the alliance, Kina is the most vocal about its disagreements. It seems its current king doesn't agree well with the Sindrian king." As far as Ceara was concerned, the Kina Kingdom would be best for refuge after the civil war. She gave herself some space by pushing her hands against his chest. "Even if I'm gone, though, I won't leave everything up in the air. Seijin and Parisa will be here. Working together, they can take over everything that I once held reigns on. The people trust Seijin because they believe he was also fooled by me. They'll sympathize—could empathize with him even when he claims that he wants to 'correct' the projects that I started."

"And Sousei and Suisei?"

The names made Ceara flinch as she shrunk onto herself. "They'll be safe here with you. Knowing that and that they're happy is all that matters to me. If they are, then I have nothing to worry about. If help is what you're offering, then I just have one thing to ask of you."

"No need," he replied without even hearing her query. "They'll be taken care of here. You have my word."

"Thank you," she whispered and hung her head as she sighed in relief. This was indeed putting faith into a heavily uncertain future but it was all she really had to go on. Once this was all over, things would be drastically different but at least they would change for the better.

 _And I won't be seeing anybody from here for a very long time once that happens._

That's right. Once this was over, Ceara would never see any of them anymore. The thought made her chest tighten, her throat dry, and her grip on Kouen a little tighter. Words she had written on that journal— _the letters_ —rushed through her mind and made her heart wrench at the notion that she would never tell any of it to any of them.

 _I could tell him._

Ceara lifted her head and met with those same eyes of crimson tinted gold. Those were eyes she had met years ago, that she had doubted, that she admired, and now that she loved. And even if he did or didn't feel the same, if she acted now she would at least not have the regret that came with not having gotten an answer.

"En." The low timbre of his humming in acknowledgement rung through her body at being so near, sending a shiver down her spine. This was bold even for her but she really had nothing to lose by doing it as things were now. Mustering the courage she needed, Ceara felt her cheeks get warmer as her lips parted to speak. "After I leave tomorrow, I won't be coming back."

"I'm aware of that now."

Ceara didn't dismiss the small movements of his hands, his fingers tighten every so slightly against her hip and back. "And I won't see you again."

"Won't be for long."

"You can't be sure of that," she corrected with a faint chuckle at his childish retorts. Shaking her head, Ceara railed her train of thought back on track before continuing. "What I'm trying to say is…" Her lips pursed, a tinge embarrassed at what she was trying to say, as her hands reached up to brush back strands of hair that obscured his face.

This was certainly taking all of her courage to convey.

"Say it."

 _And he knows it_. Oh, Ceara knew that he knew what she wanted to say. But like before, like he always did, he left the choice to her. That made her that much more certain of her decision.

"I know where we stand," Ceara said, her voice a little stronger as she garnered what was needed to say this. "And I know what will happen after tonight. But I want to forget that for a while. I don't want to think about it. Not now. Definitely not here when you're with me." Leaning forward, Ceara stood on her toes to softly press her lips against him. His hands held tighter onto her but before he could press her flush against him again, Ceara pulled back with her lips just a breath away from his. "So just for tonight, let's forget what's happening around us. Let's just be and do what we want to do with each other."

There wasn't an answer from him. There was just a breath of relief before Kouen leaned forward again to take her lips in a much deeper kiss. Rougher too. But she didn't mind it. In fact, she liked it better. But the kiss didn't take away from his hands as they roamed her backside and legs until they finally found the opening of her robes and Ceara felt the warmth of his hands directly against her skin.

Shivering from the sensation of his hands caressing her thighs, Ceara had a hard time keeping up with him, her arms barely coming up to wrap around his neck to deepen their kiss further. But as they came apart to breathe, Ceara let out a shocked yelp as Kouen hauled her up against him. Her eyes widen from the shock and she straddled his waist, holding onto his neck tightly for security. A low chuckle rumbled through his chest and reached her ears as he placed his arm under her.

"I'm not letting you fall," he assured her.

"Please don't," she asked under her breath.

It wasn't until Ceara made damn sure she wouldn't fall that she loosened her grip on his neck and leaned back a little. When she pulled back enough, Kouen caught her lips again in a rough kiss as his tongue danced against hers. Ceara got so distracted by the barrage of sensations that she didn't even notice when Kouen took her into his bedroom. She wouldn't have either had he not pulled back—no, she had when he let her down onto the bed gently. Ceara sunk against the soft bedding and gazed up as Kouen stood over her, his hands reaching down to untie her robes.

Out of sheer panic, her hands scrambled down and caught his just as they took the ribbon around her waist.

A tired, almost defeated sigh escaped him as he looked back at her. "Do you wish to stop?"

Ceara shook her head, embarrassed enough not to speak, but had to open her mouth to explain herself. "I-It's just…" Gods, this would take forever if she didn't say anything now, and they didn't have all night. _It's not like I have to spell it out._ Betting on his intellect to figure it out, Ceara lifted her head to meet his eyes even as she felt the warm blood rushing up her neck and cheeks. "Could you be gentle about it? I've never…" Ceara let her voice waver and quiet down.

Kouen's eyebrow raised, one of the few gestures he ever gave which irked her a lot at the moment. "You've never…?" But as he repeated that, his nonchalant gaze widened a tiny bit before he leaned back, one knee to the side of where she laid while the other withstood his weight against the floor. The tiny surprise in his eyes disappeared as a vacant look came over him. And she recognized it; it was that same vacant look he gave Alibaba when Koumei mentioned the whole 'cherry boy' thing. That in itself turned her embarrassment into a flash of pure annoyance.

"Is there a problem with that?" she hissed under her breath, shooting up to a sit a second before he covered his mouth with his hand, clearly trying to keep down his laughter.

"None."

The tenor of his voice surprised her. It'd change into a deep rumble with something she could only describe as a growl at the back of it. When Kouen turned back to look at her, Ceara could tell immediately that all laughing matters were left forgotten in less than a second. The deep stare he gave mesmerized her because she hadn't seen it since a long time past, that prowling gaze of the predator he was. He chuckled again, this time the rumbling from inside his body reaching her ears. His hands reached up to her shoulders and deftly brushed the fabric off of them. Ceara innately wrapped her arms around her chest, letting him disrobe only that upper half of her. Kouen scoffed but leaned in to kiss the exposed skin on her neck and collarbone, distracting her well enough to let him set her back down on the bed.

The soft touches became a bit harder with the small bites he gave her as his ministrations traveled from her collarbone, to her bosom just above her covered breasts before pressing a soft kiss onto her hands that still held her robes steadfast against her chest. Pulling back, those crimson eyes tinted gold locked onto her stark blue ones that widened at the strange look she saw. It wasn't just a predatory gaze; it was longing.

Kouen took one of her hands into his and brought it up to lay another kiss on them. "I'll make an effort to restrain myself then. But in all honesty, you shouldn't have said anything about it to begin with."

Her curiosity got the best of her and made her ask, "Why?"

"Because—"

Lowering his head, Kouen took the side of her robes she'd left unhindered with his teeth to expose her supple breast before taking the rosy nipple into his mouth. Ceara gasped as she got caught unawares but the surprise and shock quickly changed, turning into a heat that began to burn at the pit of her stomach. Her other hand, the only one free as he still held onto the one he took, reached up to grabbed at his head, her fingers entangling in his hair as he nipped at it. Her meekish moans escaped her as he moved to her other breast, giving it the same treatment. Her mind whirling, Ceara didn't notice her hand tugging at his hair and gave a soft sorry for it when he hissed under his breath. Kouen didn't acknowledge the apology though, and instead took both her wrists in one hand to pin them up over her head. Confused at first, she got no time to think about what was happening as his tongue went back to caressing one of her breasts as his hand took over the other.

A louder moan uttered from her lips at that and got a throaty chuckle out of him. Kouen lifted his head and met her eyes again. The same predatory gaze came accompanied with a crooked grin and a tinge of raw hunger she'd never seen before on him. It didn't scare her, though, it actually made the pit of warmth in her stomach grow. And his words only made it worse.

"It will certainly make our night amusing to see just how long you last—" his calloused hand left her breast and came to her leg where he trailed his finger up against her inner thigh until it reached the apex where he slid it against the warmth that pooled there, making her gasp and toss about from the unfamiliar yet not so unwelcome touch, "—before you plead for me to forget about being gentle."

* * *

Dawn was reaching over the sky, the orange rays pouring in through the window, when Kouen awoke the next day. Tired as he'd been, his whole system seemed to accomodate for the late night with a few more hours of sleep, letting dawn reach the skies before he even fully woke.

Wanting to stretch, Kouen moved slightly but stopped when he felt a weight laying on his forearm. There wasn't a need for him to look down though when the waft of lavender, a scent he'd all but drowned in the night before, came over him. Lowering his gaze, he adjusted himself to lay on his side, the silk sheets though cool easily slipping from them both, and have a better view of Ceara as she laid with her back to him. Her caramel tresses fell to the side leaving most of her back and shoulder bare. His eyes followed the dark spots he'd left through her skin knowing fully well that many more covered the front side of her.

Kouen reached out his hand to the larger bruises that formed overnight on hips from his harsh grip. He'd promised to be gentle but after a mere hour of nothing but teasing her to her limits, she'd sweetly pleaded like he wanted her to. The mere sight of her so ravished and the sound of her begging made him forget about the promise altogether as well. Frankly, though, for being her first, he might have been somewhat rough with her if the small bruises painting her fair skin where any evidence of it. And knowing her, they certainly would be. As he continued tracing the marks, Ceara flinched, tossing and turning until finally stopping once fully turned about and facing him before dozing off again.

Now that he could thoroughly see her face in the midst of blissful sleep, his gut wrenched at the thought of not seeing it—of not seeing _her_ again. Not wanting the disheartening notion to sour the serene morning, Kouen reached out with his free arm to the small of her back and, with the other already under her, brought her closer to him so that her bare body was flush against his. Ceara tossed some more as she accommodated herself, finally resting her head on his chest and hiding her face against the crook of his neck while he laid his chin on top of her head.

This serenity that she brought onto him hadn't been mere coincidence like he first thought. Despite how much he wanted to disprove it to himself and Koumei who so bolstered about being right, he couldn't.

Not after last night. Not after all he had said and done. Not when he felt like it'd been the right thing to do for himself.

And yet Kouen had been foolish enough to resist at the start. It'd been the reason he moved his work to his antechamber instead of his quarters. It was meant to appear less enticing. She hadn't made it that easy.

But what happened happened. And truthfully, there wasn't a regret to be found in him because of it.

The sun was quickly beginning to raise high, letting him know that time was ticking against him. Chuu'un would be there to take her away with Koumei and the rest. And as much as he didn't want to, he had to get her ready for it. Somehow managing to tear himself away from the tight hold that she had on him even as she slept, Kouen dressed and called for servants to prepare a bath. Since his bathing room and quarters could be accessed through different doors, there wouldn't be a need to wake her up too soon. Nobody would see her anyway.

But even if she bathed, there were no clothes for her there. And something told him that getting her to wear other women's clothes again wouldn't settle well with her after last night. Opting for the safer option, Kouen gave a message for En Shou to pass along to Seijin. Surely the boy would be smart enough bring her garments without asking questions. It wasn't until he was informed that the bath was set that he approached Ceara as she still slept soundly in his bed.

Intent on waking her, Kouen started reaching down but stopped when out of nowhere Ceara flinched again. It'd been like before but seeing her face this time told him that whatever made her move hurt her. And it did again when her whole body jerked and curled into itself, her hand immediately shooting off to grab onto her shoulder as a dark green gleam began to glow, tracing the mark that never left her shoulder or chest. Before he had a chance to do anything, the glimmer burst into a much brighter light that made Ceara wake with a scream, her head slamming down against the bed as her breathing hitched and turned labored.

Unaware of what was happening, Kouen reached down again and helped her sit up, one of her hands pressing down on her shoulder as the other reached up to her head. Without any prompting, Ceara let herself speak through the clear pain she was in.

"I-It's fine," she said, a little too loudly. After saying that, Ceara began muttering under her breath. It seemed she wasn't really thinking about anything and just speaking whatever came to her mind. After a few minutes of that, Kouen heard her sigh as her tight grip on both her head and shoulder slackened considerably. Ceara turned her gaze up to offer what he guessed was a reassuring smile but it did little appease him.

"Are you all right now?"

"Yeah, I think so," Ceara replied, her hands touching her eyes, ears, nose, and mouth as if checking for something. _Blood._ Kouen recalled the sight when she'd been in the sickroom and remembered what Parisa had said about it.

"The magic casts even when you sleep." It wasn't a question, just a mere deduction. One that sadly turned out to be true by the nod she gave him.

"When Parisa said I needed to constantly use up the magoi reservoir that piles up in me, she wasn't joking around." Excusing herself, Ceara coughed into her hand, intentionally by the looks of it since she checked her palm right after. "It collects all the time."

"And it wakes you," he added, brushing his thumb under her eyes where dark circles started to become visible.

"Mild headaches through the night," she explained, wiping her hand on the sheets before taking his hand off of her face. "I've woken up with blood coming out of my ears and nose. Sometimes from my eyes. I think exhausting the load helped me sleep through the night though." As soon as that escaped her lips, Ceara pursed them shut. The gesture itself made him curious.

"Exhausting the load?" he repeated, wanting some elaboration on that.

Looking away, Ceara mumbled something under her breath that he couldn't hear. Kouen had to tell her to raise her voice so he could hear for her to finally speak up. "It helped me get rid of magoi, using my voice so much...last night."

 _Her voice._ Ah, yes. She had been quite vocal with the incessant moans and cries of ecstasy that he could still hear in his head. And recalling that made the whole memory surface more vividly. Kouen chuckled under his breath before placing a hand on her head. "It's good you slept well then. A bath is waiting for you."

She turned curious, her previous embarrassment forgotten, and asked, "Bath?"

"To clean up. You depart soon."

Her gaze askance, Ceara seemed disheartened at the reminder but Kouen had done away with what veil of bliss was still left from the night before. After all, she had said that they would use that night only to forget about the world and everything else that was going on. They had, and now that the sunrise was peaking, that night was regretfully over.

Kouen gave a brief word about the rest of his quarters before beginning to leave to give her some privacy. Before he even turned though, a small hand stopped him in his tracks. Glancing over his shoulder, he saw her standing with one hand holding one of his and the other pulling the silk sheets to cover her front side. His eyes lingered on the bare skin she couldn't cover with one hand alone that was covered in small bruises or bitemarks before they met with hers, a slight dust of pink on her cheeks catching his attention.

"What is it?" he asked when she seemed to refrain from speaking.

Ceara took a deep breath, something he knew was meant to compose herself, before replying "Join me."

He raised an eyebrow at the bold invitation but didn't completely discard it. It certainly was appealing the way she looked.

 _There's no time to fool around._

He wouldn't. At least not long enough to warrant it be called a waste. Taking a hold of her hand back was all it took for the color in her cheeks to darken. Not caring anymore, Ceara pulled him along to his bathing room giving Kouen a sublime view as she walked ahead of him. And since time was of the essence now, Kouen's hand readily undid the tie on his own robes before they even crossed the doors.

* * *

"I know I shouldn't worry, or even ask for that matter, but I certainly am curious. I thought this was supposed to be a cordial visit to help rid you of stress."

"It was," his brother replied, "and it did."

Koumei nodded not believing for a second what his brother said. They weren't waiting on their prisoner to finish dressing in his own brother's bedroom for nothing, after all. He knew about Ceara being taken out of her sickroom by Chuu'un—it'd been a request from his brother—and he knew for what. Or could guess at least. His brother had always said he enjoyed his leisure time better alone. That changed when he didn't seem to mind the young woman's presence. At first, out of necessity, and then out of something more.

Something Koumei surmised that his older brother didn't want to admit. Not out loud at least. But even when he never said a word about it, Koumei had been more than aware of the change in him. Subtle at first, he recognized it for what it was: something he never thought would affect his brother as much as it seemed to now.

"Sorry about the delay." Koumei's gaze fell over the door as Ceara trotted out, tying the ribbon of the simple robes Seijin brought for her, said boy running after her with a sword and necklace in hand.

He didn't so much as acknowledge her apology and instead turned to Chuu'un who politely asked for her hands. There wasn't a complain from her as she reached out her joined wrists so he could tie them with the rope in his hands. Once secured, Ceara turned to both brothers with an indifferent expression.

But what her face didn't tell him, the dark marks that poked from underneath the collar of her robes certainly did. Koumei dragged a long sigh before nodding and letting Chuu'un take her away.

"Don't arm her until I authorize it," he ordered the young boy who simply nodded and followed after his household member and their prisoner. Koumei gave his farewells to his brother and emperor but stopped briefly before looking over his shoulder at Kouen. "Is there anything that I need to be made aware of?"

The question wasn't arbitrary. It wasn't accusatory either. Aside from being genuinely interested for his brother's wellbeing, Koumei needed all the information he could get to strategize accordingly.

"Nothing that will hinder our plans," his brother replied after a brief pause. "I can assure you of that."

He nodded but a part of him wasn't that all assured, his mind already concocting contingencies plans for anything that woman could do. She had shown to be an extremist when the situation called for it; that needed to be accounted for.

"Koumei."

Those stern eyes of his brother's locked with his, ones that reminded Koumei much of their father. Awaiting for him to speak, he watched his older brother curiously like when they were children. An influence and force to be reckoned with, Kouen was many extraordinary things but subtle wasn't one of of them. Especially not with things that he was passionate about.

"When this ends, all soldiers that cannot be accounted for after three day's time will be declared deceased." Kouen sighed and averted his gaze to the scrolls and maps that laid on his table. "We will put this all behind us afterwards and continue as planned."

And by the sound of it, this was something he would personally see through. But whatever it may be—there was no question, really, what _it_ was—Koumei believed that Kouen would do what was right for their country. He believed in his brother enough to know that whatever he chose to do, it would be right for all those involved. Even for her despite all she'd done.

 _There's really no difference between lover and prisoner it seems._

Even still, whatever hazard she could pose to Kouen, Koumei would be sure to ensure his family's safety first and foremost. And at the moment, that implied winning a civil war against the self-declared emperor of the eastern Kou faction—against their younger cousin, the brother and son of the most awe inspiring men he had ever met.

With everything that was at stake now, there was no room for leniency. If Ceara did not cooperate or if she did anything as asinine as she did before, he wouldn't hesitate to give Kouha the order to execute her.

There would be no room for error with him. She _would_ cooperate or by the time this war ended, they would have her head along Hakuryuu's.

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _Damn, I had to hurry about finish this chapter. It legit took longer than I thought it would but I finished it. And perfect since today I start the long and hard 5 weeks of summer school. Two labs in 5 weeks is going to kill me and my free time. So I'll leave you guys with this and more updates._

 _First of all, that bit of smut towards the end? Completely ad lib. That thing was not in the rubric. Nothing remotely close to that was ever in the plans. And then when I start freaking working without an outline, it suddenly pops up. Well, it's rated M anyway. If you liked it or not, well, that's for you to decide. It just gives me a better timeline to work with in all honesty. (And perhaps I'm a naughty little shit that can't help herself (-w- U))_

 _Also, the song at the beginning flashback was_ _ **Everything's Alright**_ _by Laura Shigihara and featured in 'To the Moon.' It's a cute and heartfelt little song. Haven't played the game but sounds like a heartwrencher from what I've heard. I might just play it whenever I have time (or a life) again._

 _Let's answer the reviews since I didn't have much time to answer all of them and thanks the other wonderful reviewers as well:_

 _-_ _ **grimxichixshiroxmomoxorixx:**_ _Thanks, I really like fighting scenes and try my best to describe the freaking Cirque de Soleil shit that goes on in my brain when I'm imagining them. Yeah, everybody was a baka last chapter._

 _-_ _ **Esmee**_ _: Haha, yeah, love finally comes out for the two densest characters I know (and had the pleasure to create). And thanks as well for the kudos on the fight scene. A nickname for Ceara? I always just thought her name was enough, or Speirr even, but I guess maybe a nickname for her real name. Cea (See-a)? That makes me wonder what the couple name would be for these two dorks, actually. Meh, I'll leave that to the experts (the fans). And yes, I'm all right. Just some life blues is all *reaches for the syrupwaffels and stuffs them in mouth* Thanks though for worrying about me. And no, I'm not Ausie, mate cx Just a normal, ol' Californian. About the women's clothes in Kouen, that was basically a little pique about his private life as prince, something that is delved on in one of the omake's of the manga. Basically, princes are given women to sleep with so that they can ensure they leave heirs. The older, the more. That was just a tad bit reminder of how experienced (sexually, as least) Kouen is which contrasted here with Ceara's inexperience. *Fist pumps* Yes, for mind read. Let's go for an 3-0 score on my mind reading skills this time too._

 _-_ _ **Aviantei**_

 _ **\- Miqila**_

 _ **\- Crazywordsmith**_

 _ **\- AmericanNidiot**_

 _Now the kudos for those lovelies who Follow and Favorite:_

 _-_ _ **Cexin**_

 _ **\- Sonata Fuling**_

 _Now for something a little, sort of unrelated but still important, guess how many more chapters this story has? Surprise, I have no solid number but I know almost with 99% certainty that it won't be more than three chapters. That means that after a year Silent Lamb will be ending. But we'll cross that bridge when I built it to burn it down ;) At least after SL, ya'll have more stories to look forward to: three to be exact. I'll be focusing more on my KH story after SL finishes but I'll surely be working on the other three for this series (that I still have yet to named→ suggestions welcomed!) all the while on the background._

 _For now, I'll leave you all with this. I'll keep updating on twitter ( xkeyoftheabyss) if I start writing between these 5 weeks if I can. Hoped you enjoyed this chapter and stay tuned for the next chapter! :D_


	16. Tearing Down Walls

_**Chapter Sixteen**_

 _ **Tearing Down Walls**_

* * *

Thousands upon thousands of able soldiers and their tents spread across the vastness of the plateau. Their presence was just as greatly spread, her eyes unable to see where they ended and the rest of the prairie began. But with over half a million men to fight this war, Ceara supposed that a whole plateau was necessary to hold the fort that was their headquarters.

A light tug of her ropes broke her out of her stupor and got her to walk forth following after Chuu'un into an empty tent. It wasn't small by any means and it was well furnished. Surely it must be their new General Commander's.

"Wait outside. I'll call for you to retrieve her in a few minutes."

Ceara held the sigh she wanted to let go of before meeting Koumei as his household member left the tent. His light crimson eyes scrutinized her and her stark blue ones did the same wanting to know why exactly she was there.

 _I have my suspicions, though._

"What happened between the two of you?"

Her mind reeled back for a few seconds. She wanted to ask him what he was talking about but they both knew exactly what it was. Playing coy with him wouldn't do her any good, not when he was the most serious she'd ever seen him. So instead, Ceara opted to tell him the truth.

"A mere carnal need on both our sides." A lie. At least where she was concerned. Ceara knew exactly what she felt for Kouen and why, but telling that to his little brother wouldn't be good at this moment. She still was doubtful about Kouen as well even after last night. One thing kept her hope alive, though. Words he never once uttered but that Ceara swore she felt with every kiss and every touch he gave her. But again, that wasn't something to say to the little brother. "He was willing as was I. There wasn't really much more to it than that."

"He wouldn't be trying to make up excuses if that were it," Koumei countered, his brow furrowing and quickly turning irate.

"He isn't."

Koumei's frown turned more prominent at hearing this but it didn't deter her from the answer she gave. His reply did make her stop to think about things, though. "Whatever it may be, I assure you that if your intentions put him in peril, I will personally rid us of you."

"There won't be a need." Ceara didn't want to spill the truth about her running away after the war. Kouen was already doing enough to help her with what he could. All she could do now was try and maintain the status quo and get suspicion away from herself as much as possible. But Koumei didn't seem like he would leave things just like that. Especially now when they concerned his brother.

Frankly, though, she understood his concern. And there was one way she knew she could dispel that doubt.

"Koumei, I love Kouen."

His eyes widened at the declaration that came out of nowhere. Ceara almost felt the embarrassment crawl up her neck at saying those words, ones she hadn't even told Kouen himself, but she knew they were true. After all that happened, Ceara knew they were. Koumei's bafflement didn't disappear for a solid second and gave her enough time to explain herself as a smile came to her lips.

"And I am never telling him that," she confessed, letting that same smile falter but keeping his gaze locked with hers. "I'm fighting this war to save my siblings, to give stability back to the country I grew up in, and to bring the man I love a step closer to his goal. I'm doing this out of selfishness and because I am, you should know that I'll do whatever's in my hands to make it come true." Ceara chuckled dryly after saying that, wiping her cheek with her joined hands. "So don't worry, Mei, I'll do my best to end this war with you all."

The second prince remained speechless for another second before sighing and calling out for Chuu'un. Before the older household member could enter, though, he gave her a quick word.

"Then end it and begone from our lives and his once it's over."

"I will," she promised, knowing it to be the best for them all. Chuu'un entered quickly thereafter and took her away from Koumei's tent, taking her instead to another where Parisa and Seijin awaited. Although pleasant, it'd been a surprise.

The two hurried her way as she entered. Seijin questioned if the restraints were really necessary while Parisa went ahead to check on the condition of the bangl around her wrist. Chuu'un's reply was that they were orders; she couldn't be let off of her constraints unless it was necessary. And according to Koumei's order those necessities narrowed down to self-care and fighting. Nothing else. And to top it off, Chuu'un remained with her since he had to escort her back when Koumei briefed the generals and captains about tomorrow's deployment.

"Where are you being stationed?" Ceara asked them both. Seijin eyed the household member that remained by the door skeptically. Ceara simply waved her hands dismissively—as best she could, anyway—before asking again. "He's here. Forget about it and answer me."

Parisa went first seeing as she was the one less bothered by Chuu'un's presence. "I'll be with Prince Kouha and the first army."

"I'll be supporting Princess Kougyoku with the second army," Seijin told her.

"Be on your guard, both of you." Ceara turned to Seijin first, her eyes steeled with solemnity. "Seijin, don't try to conjure up your household vessel. Even if I have Murmur while I'm fighting, you haven't had any time to practice. So don't put your faith in it when it's never been tested before." The blond nodded in agreement, his hand brushing up against the cuff earing that held the household vessel.

She then proceeded to address Parisa who simply sat listening intently. "Parisa, I know you're strong and can handle yourself but I don't believe you've ever been in a real battlefield, have you?"

"Not really." The young magician averted her gaze, tilting her head sideway with a pout to her lips. "Magnostadt allowed those who didn't want to fight to leave. So I left with enough time to escape the big fight that happened. Wasn't my country to protect anyway."

 _That's not disconcerting at all._

"Would you do that now?" Ceara asked.

It was then that Parisa turned to face her fully again with a grin that spread from ear to ear. "I may not fight for a country that's not mine and that I owe nothing to but I'll certainly fight for the people that I'm close to. And you two're certainly that. So no worries there, Miss of Eriu. Rest assured that you have the great magician Parisa on your side for this."

"Good," Ceara breathed before smiling and returning to face her vassal. "In that case, be sure to remain by Junjun, Reirei, Jinjin, and Kan Meihou. They're Kouha's most trusted which means they're well trained as well. So even if by some god forbidden happenstance something occurs, you'll be safe with them. We're fighting to stop this, yes. But, you guys, don't die on me," she reminded them tenderly. "Whatever happens, I want you to live."

"As do we," Parisa told her and gave her a cheeky grin before she continued. "We want to live beyond this war as well. After all, we've got all those projects and stuff to take care of, don't we?"

Ceara watched the small smile that grew on Parisa's and Seijin's lips when the magician said that. They knew that she could no longer lead the orphan houses or the memoirs and both had stepped up to claim ownership over them. Ceara had expected Seijin; he always talked about how proud he felt about working for such a good cause. Parisa had been the surprise yet again. The young magician had been smitten with the idea and volunteered to join the cause. It was because of them that she was so sure that she could leave without either project suffering.

 _They're in good hands._

"Plus, after this war, I don't think your incarceration will be permanent." Seijin grinned at the thought, leaning forward. "His majesty never ordered for imperial punishment, after all. Surely it'll take some years but you'll be able to come out and work with us again after this."

Ceara couldn't help the smile that came over her along with the happiness his words gave her. It pushed aside the gloom that also arose when they were thinking so much about a future that she wouldn't be a part of.

 _It's okay, though. Even without me, they'll pull through. They're capable of that._

And that was enough reassurance for her. She took an hour more to talk through with them some of the things she knew they would encounter out in the battlefield. None had fought in a real battle, certainly not a civil war. Without a doubt, this fight would be different than others. Here, they wouldn't be fighting strangers. Here, they would be fighting their own country. And that was something they had to be ready to face.

"It's time." Ceara heaved a sigh and nodded to Chuu'un over her shoulder before all three of them stood up.

Seijin and Parisa came up to her, touching her bound hands tenderly and smiling at her. She reciprocated the gesture knowing nothing else that there could be said except for a quaint 'take care of yourselves.' Chuu'un wasted no time and took her away. It was the middle of the day still but Ceara surmised that this meeting would take most of what was left of daylight to discuss.

But as she walked through the multitudes of soldiers, Ceara noticed a tangible animosity that crawled under her skin. At first, it'd been something she could ignore when they arrived at the camp. Now that they were heading to their General Commander's tent, though, she felt all eyes on her, digging into her like daggers. Murmurs came above the shuffling of their walk but she ignored them the best she could.

Those she heard outside were nothing in comparison to the ones she heard the instant she entered, though. All eyes turned to her once more, some accusatory, others purely of hatred. Heaving a sigh, Ceara scanned the place quickly, noticing that mostly all of them were people she knew or had heard of. There were generals and captains, about twenty or so altogether, gathered there. Amongst them, Ceara instantly noticed the pair of magenta and pink eyes staring at her. Kouha's was definitely more somber than Kougyoku's but certainly both intense for the position they were in. The princess and princes joining their people in the battlefield as metal vessel users gave them a much higher responsibility, especially in this civil war. Now they had to uphold an image. It was one that Ceara once held. One that she didn't have to hold anymore. And that was good because what some of them were saying was definitely meant to upset her.

"Traitor."

"Why is she still alive?"

"She shouldn't be here."

"His majesty said they'll be using her for the war. It's imperative we keep her alive."

"Surely, she will be dealt with once the war is over and she's served her purpose."

They weren't even trying to hide their enmity. It was more than apparent where they stood where she was concerned. But Ceara wasn't about to let them or anyone have their say with her. Not anymore. Not ever again.

Stopping in her tracks and making Chuu'un stop with her, Ceara took a deep breath so that her voice would resonate well through the space. "Say what you will—you can wish for my death all you want or even derogate me and what I've done—the fact still remains that I'm here because you need me. You need _us_ to win this war. So I could care less how you treat me or what you say."

 _In the end, I'll be glad to see you writhe in the embarrassment once you realize you actually need me._

With her piece said, Ceara finally followed after the household member as he stood off to the side with his hold still tight on her rope. Ceara watched from her place behind Kougyoku, the princess shifting a bit and her glance wanting to turn over her shoulder, and listened intently at what Koumei had to say.

They would position themselves tomorrow and advance when the time arose. As of now, Koumei would be commanding them as General Commander, just like she had thought, while Kouen commanded both the western and northern armies. From the recount of their current territory, Ceara could see that their western faction held a good portion of the continent with Rakushou and its nearby territory being exempted.

On paper, Hakuryuu appeared hilariously overwhelmed by their numbers. They had almost ten times his troops and much more terrain to work with. And that wasn't even mentioning the fact that they had ten metal vessels and six metal vessel users where he had up to two.

On theory it should be a flawless victory. But Ceara knew better than to ride on theories and plans.

"And what happens if we're defeated?"

Kouha's abrupt and grim statement caught everyone's attention. It also corroborated the same fear she harbored about this civil war. Ceara had fought her share of battles, few as they were, and the one that most vividly resembled this was Hakucho. The conquer of that city should have been clean: they hadn't the numbers, the techniques, or the strategy that she had had. And yet, despite everything pointing to a flawless victory, they had failed.

And Ceara knew that this could turn out the same if they became overzealous. This was why she greatly appreciated Kouha's words. It grounded their minds to the reality of what there was to win and, more importantly, what there was to lose. They were fighting to protect the Kou Empire they knew. They were fighting to protect what Emperor Hakutoku and his sons built. And what Koumei added to it only fueled their determination.

 _We have to win for everybody's future._

And his last request to them was a simple one.

"Please win."

Everybody present took a knee and saluted, vowing that they would win. Knowing it to be right, she stood and took a knee as well, simply bowing down her head when she couldn't salute seeing as her hands were held up by the rope Chuu'un held.

And Koumei made it clear to them how they would know they have won. It would be when they had Hakuryuu's head. And that was her grim reminder of the price of war they would pay.

* * *

Night was passing quicker than she thought possible. Even the few hours she had alone were been restless. Ceara's mind was full of voices and her body tense from vibrations, both of which she quelled with a well-deserved holler. She startled the group of soldiers that were left to guard her in the tiny tent and unintentionally dazed them at letting out the shout. It made her feel bad for about a second.

But just for a second. Too bad she had to do it to safeguard her sanity. Otherwise she would start losing her mind before she even entered the battlefield. Raising her tied wrists, Ceara watched the bracelet on her left wrist as its light dimmed from the waste of magoi. But after that, she couldn't ignore how the exhaustion of not having replenished her own magoi for the last couple of days took its toll on her.

"Dawn's coming already, isn't it?" she said to nobody in particular, wanting to waste the magoi from the seal as much as she could to let hers recover. Ceara tilted her head back and stared at the ceiling of the small alcove she was in. Despite being unable to see the outside, she could tell from the clamoring of voices that her ears caught instead that a new day was beginning. The whole of their troops would be moving on towards the Kannan Plains soon. Every soldier and magician would already be mobilizing to their ranks in order to advance east.

"Your highness."

Ceara lowered her gaze to meet Kouha's stare as he walked in. Deliberately and with a kind smile, he dismissed the two from their posts so they could wait outside. She wasn't so sure what for. At least not until she saw the mound of clothes he held in his arms. Coming closer to where she sat, he laid the clothes aside on a table before staring down at her. A long strenuous silence came over them that she decided to break when she saw one of his fine brows raise.

"Are these for me?"

"You can't very well go to battle out in rags." Taking a small dagger from behind him, Kouha swiftly undid the ties on her wrists. He sighed and walked over to the exit, lifting the flap of the tent and eyeing her over his shoulder. "Get dressed while I bring you some armor." Kouha left her quickly thereafter, surely with the guards still outside for privacy.

Reminding herself to thank him, Ceara took the time to change into the simple blue and white hanfu Kouha brought her. The colors were simple as was the design. The sleeves were just long enough and the breeches comfortable enough to move under her skirts. Funnily enough, they fit just right, too. It was as she adjusted some of her hair into a bun at her nape of her neck to let the rest fall when Kouha returned with the light armor he promised. This time, though, he wasn't alone. Kan Meihou and Reirei were with him, the former carrying the light armor and the latter carrying a small chest with her hands.

Kan Meihou left the light armor for her on the same table Kouha had left her clothes. Ceara took the pauldrons and put them in place on her shoulders along with the rest of the armor before turning to nod at Reirei and the chest.

"What is that?"

"Your weapons." Kouha took the lid in his hands and opened the chest to reveal her metal vessels neatly nestled inside together with a zircon necklace she recognized.

This time it was Ceara who raised a questioning brow. "I thought Koumei said that I wouldn't get them until we reached the battlefield."

"You're under my command and I want all my soldiers able and ready to enter a battle as soon as we march out onto the plains." He motioned to Reirei who promptly placed the chest on the table. It wasn't until she did that Ceara noticed the sheathed sword that the magician held on her hip which she also drew out and held in her palms.

These weren't just her metal vessels. These were Suisei's and Sousei's household vessels too. Ceara wanted to ask how Kouha got ahold of them but refrained after a second. She didn't need to know. Having them close was good enough. She thanked him for bringing them to her before she placed them on herself. Beleth's crimson feather fit well between the folds of the ribbon on her waist. Seeing as her left wrist was now occupied by Parisa's bangle, Marbas' bracelet had to go on her right. There wasn't really a difference either way. Murmur was the one that she promptly placed in her bun, some more of her hair falling down her back as she accommodated him. A distinct and familiar warmth rushed through her body, one that she relished in after not having had them with her for what felt like an eternity.

Their presence comforted her days of solitude and madness. That she had their household vessels as well let relief come over her like a calm wave.

"Thank you for bringing them safely to me," Ceara said with a genuine smile. "And for the equipment too."

Kouha nodded and dismissed his attendants, speaking only after they left. He tapped at his neck, just at his collarbone, before a wicked half-grin came over him. "You have fun with someone?"

Feeling the blood rush up her neck and to her cheeks, Ceara brought the edges of her garments closer to hide her own collarbone where she knew faint marks were still left from two nights ago. "It's really nothing for you to poke around in."

"It is if it's with who I think it was." Kouha's mischievous grin changed into a more sincere one. "Was it?"

Ceara didn't want to lie. She hadn't to Koumei. There wasn't really a reason to lie to Kouha, either. "Yes."

The young prince let out a scoff followed by a chuckle. "Who would've thought, huh?"

The giddiness that he gave off despite their current situation lifted her mood a bit. "He's not as distant or difficult as he comes off as. Rather caring and gentle, actually."

Kouha scrunched his nose in feigned disgust before chuckling again. "Stop. I don't want to hear about your sexual endeavors with my brother." The two shared a small laugh before his tone turned serious again. "We'll be moving out soon. With you, we will have three metal vessel users and five metal vessels. The plan is to reach Hakuryuu—"

"And finish it all using our Extreme Magic against him," Ceara finished for him with a weary smile. "I know. I was there when Koumei told us the plan. I wasn't spacing out all of the time."

"I hope you weren't," he pointed out. "You're a type of secret weapon for us. That thing—" he said pointing at the gleaming bracelet on her left wrist then at her shoulder "—Mei-nii told me about it. It casts magic, right?"

"Yeah," Ceara replied, rotating the bracelet around her wrist anxiously. "What I can do is limited by itself, though. But with Beleth I should be able to exploit it."

"Then keep that hidden. We'll use you as a trump card if things get worse."

"Our hopes are they won't," she finished for him.

Kouha agreed and motioned out toward the exit. "Shall we?" Ceara took his lead and both left the tent but as soon as they did she felt their glares and heard their whispers. Again the hatred seeped into her ears but Kouha said just enough to calm her down. "Don't listen to them. They're afraid without even knowing it. You're the easier target right now. Things will change when we get out on the battlefield."

"You sound so sure," she whispered under her breath.

"I am," he replied, "Trust me, once we're fighting, they won't care about you much when they're busy trying to kill off Hakuryuu."

 _He's not wrong._

It took them another hour to round the battalion. The first army of which she was a part of consisted of 220,000 men. That was an unfathomable number to her. Even the second army with its 200,000 men amounted to so much more than she had ever commanded herself. Now a young prince and princess commanded them. And those were just the largest of their armada. It certainly didn't account for the 100,000 of the third army or the 90,000 of the fourth which were nothing but dungeon creatures.

After gathering the huge army, it was easier to move them toward the Kanan Plains. By the sound of the information Junjun, Jinjin, and Reirei gave them, Hakuryuu's army had advanced towards the center of the plains. Ceara supposed that he chose his battlefield; if so then there was a good possibility that he'd be joining the battle himself. That would make their jobs much easier.

As they rode on their horses towards the center of the plains, Ceara heard the hoard of rukh surrounding them. Or her, more like it. She knew that as the beacon she was, Ceara could garner rukh that was compatible with sound magic. And from the side glances that the three magicians kept giving her and the fact that she could hear them loud and clear, she supposed they were fluttering about.

A sudden disturbance shook the rukh around them, though, their fluttering became suddenly more erratic a second before a familiar voice thundered through the plains. Ceara crushed her hands against her ears as Hakuryuu's voice rang through the air, the volume hurting her eardrums as the boy spoke.

"This is a message for all the soldiers in the rebel army—"

 _Too loud._

" _Allow me."_ Beleth dispersed the particles around them, nullifying the vibrations. Even with Beleth's protection, she could still hear the message through her soundproof sphere.

Hakuryuu wanted Kouen's head. And if they delivered, they would avoid annihilation.

At least according to him. Not only that. He spread lies, claiming that Kouen was in league with Gyokuen and had aided in Emperor Hakutoku's and the crown princes' murders. Ceara knew, far more than anyone, that that was a huge lie. And by the looks of it, his soldiers went with that lie, chanting 'usurper' at the top of their lungs as they marched towards them.

Ceara held tightly onto the reins of her mare, disassociating for a split second. There wasn't any stopping Hakuryuu. He'd gone through hell and back to finish this, something that Ceara presumed had been boiling deep in him for much too long.

Kouen had been somewhat right. Having left Hakuryuu to himself because they thought him a lost cause due to his deep-seated hatred had been a grave mistake. One they should have dealt with from its roots. But thinking about what could've or should've been done was useless now. Now, to take action was necessary.

Hakuryuu needed to die.

 _No matter how against it I am._

In a fell swoop, Ceara caught the sight of Kouha bringing down his arm, bellowing to the air for their advance. Gripping the reins tighter, she rode ahead at full speed flanking Kouha as Kougyoku did the same. Thousands upon thousands of hooves stampeded through Kanan's terrain, causing an uproar of noise that Ceara felt crawl under her skin as the rukh around her went crazy. As they neared the enemy brigade, Ceara drew her brother's sword from its sheath praying that this ended swiftly.

And as they clashed, army against army, she pierced through a soldier before the monstrosity it had become could take her off from her horse. The next came and just as swiftly, she dealt with them. But the more they came after her and the rest of the army, the more Ceara noticed something wasn't right. Despite their overwhelming numbers, these people weren't backing down. It's like they felt no fear. And that kept their momentum going. Even with the disparity of their numbers, they weren't deterred.

This abnormal behavior only became starker as their second battalion came through, the brutes slashing cleanly through soldiers and horses alike with tremendous strength. That fearlessness and perseverance was killing their soldiers. They had little against them in strength with whatever had been done to them.

They weren't normal.

 _I can't fight them like they are._

Sheathing her sword and calling out to Murmur, Ceara summoned her weapon equip, the chains of the lantern wrapping around her waist as she held the reins of her horse and part of the chains in one hand and the scythe in the other. Without hesitation, she sprung forward at the same time she flung her scythe out towards the enemy. The long reach and sharpness of the blade caught six enemies right through the throat, decapitating them, before it returned, the chains clanking against each other as she caught it above her head.

Soldiers of theirs she saved by killing those six backed off, letting the next line of men step forward. Ceara was about to attack again when two blurs of pink rushed by the corner of her eyes. Following them, she saw Kouha and Kougyoku protecting their soldiers the same as her as they kept fighting.

But even so, she also saw something in Kougyoku. Something that she recognized.

Hesitation; it was as clear as day.

" _Regardless of the situation, she's killing her own people,"_ Murmur told her, _"That would cast doubt in anyone's heart."_

"Kougyoku! Look at 'em!" Kouha shouted as he swung his sword to deal with the enemy that came at them. "They're fighting against their wills—"

Ceara couldn't agree more with Kouha. These people weren't themselves anymore. They needed to take care of it. Hesitation would only cost them a larger number of casualties. Kouen, Koumei, and Hakuei were elsewhere. And all they had to take care of the war, to finish it all, was the three of them.

Her breath hitched for a second when Kouha was about to be struck but was shocked to see Kougyoku pushing forward and slashing the soldier with her sword, protecting her brother.

 _That's right._ _This is all to protect the people we care for._

Calling Murmur, Ceara conjured the souls of the soldiers that died in the battlefield. Their rukh fresh from their bodies retained some awareness for a couple of seconds before it was gone, the lantern by her hip burning brighter the more of their rukh she took. With enough in the lantern, she armed them and sent them forth to deal with as many of Hakuryuu's men as they could.

The specters weren't sturdy to begin with, so a single hit from those behemoths destroyed them easily. But the small openings they made for their soldiers were worth it.

"First and second armies!" Kouha called out, the call getting her attention as well. "Follow me and Kougyoku; we're going according to plan. We're putting an end to this once and for all!"

Reining her horse towards Kouha, she rode next to him all the while letting her scythe recover and conjure as many specters as it could.

"We're not supposed to waste our magoi!" Kouha shouted at her.

"I'm not wasting it!" Ceara corrected. In reality, she couldn't. Using Murmur and Marbas would deplete her own magoi, true, but anything she wasted, she could easily replenish with Beleth and her seal. And despite how constrained the flux was, it still filled her at an unbelievable pace. It would hurt like hell but if it helped them stop this massacre sooner then it was worth the pain.

Without a word, Ceara followed after Kouha and Kougyoku as the rest of soldiers at the sidelines encircled the enemy army. It proved useless, though. Normal strategies wouldn't work on soldiers who didn't feel fear or hesitation. But it appeared that the brothers had thought of this as well seeing as Koumei's transfer circles appeared before them. Ceara watched Kouha dismount and summon his weapon equip, sending hordes of gravity magic to destroy the enemy's surroundings and creating cliffs around them.

Undeterred, the enemy fell through wanting to climb to the other side but the oil and fire that they shot at the pit all around turned the moat into an inferno. But it didn't end there. Slabs upon slabs of stone fell from the sky through Koumei's transfer circles, creating a makeshift furnace.

Her mind racing, Ceara understood their logic. If they couldn't fight them head on, it'd be easier to entrap them and kill them all off at once. Not to mention that such thing would decrease the number of deaths.

"Ceara!" Turning her horse, she sped off after Kouha and Kougyoku after he called out for her. Everything was going as well as could be expected. With their magoi mostly intact, the three of them could finish this.

The earth shook as both of Hakuryuu's generals landed before them, impeding their path. "We can't allow that!"

Impatient and rash as he could be, Kouha struck first but his Niyoi Rentou got sent flying with him. And Ceara could see how. One look was all it took for her to realize that those two were Household Members, surely of both Zagan and Belial.

 _Full assimilation?_

Yes, but not normal either. And Kouha agreed with that. These assimilations were too fast, too forced. But their powers were just the same as those of fully assimilated members. Belial manipulated their own soldiers against each other and Zagan sucked the magoi out of the magicians it caught in its vines.

And it was forcing them to fall into their hands by getting Kouha to use his magoi.

 _I don't have that problem._

Summoning Beleth in Murmur's stead, she brandished her sound staff before vaulting over her horse to send sound sickles towards the two generals.

"Anegimi, you can't—"

"I can't waste magoi!" she told her, redirecting her question into the answer. Feeling the noise under her skin, Ceara felt it travel through her as she used the seal's magoi to augment the power of her attacks, effectively drawing the two behemoths back. Landing next to Kouha, she urged him back, reminding him of what Kougyoku had. "Don't waste it here."

"A path needs to be cleared for us," he reminded her, holding his sword tightly in his hands.

"I know." A sound from the distance caught her ear and got Ceara to recoil, bringing her weapon up to protect the boy beside her. It was needless, though. The attack hadn't been meant for them. Following the trajectory from whence it came, Ceara saw Ri Seishu and Kin Gaku in their fully assimilated forms. Ceara couldn't help the grin at Seishu's cheekiness but ignored it as she pushed Kouha to his horse, urging them to leave.

They still had to finish this.

"Their headquarters aren't far!" Kouha shouted through the ruckus of hooves clashing against the plains. "Once there, we attack with everything we have on my signal."

"Understood!" Kougyoku agreed.

Ceara only nodded; there wasn't much to say. Not when they were so close to ending this. When the enemy headquarters caught their attention, Kouha bellowed his order to djinn equip. Neither she nor Kougyoku hesitated.

 _Dwell in my body, Murmur._

Murmur's was the most destructive Extreme Magic she had. Able to manipulate the rukh and magoi of the dead, with all that she collected in this war, _Qahr Al'abria'_ would implode the rukh of anything alive and drain it from them. Death rukh would fuel its power and implode more of the life rukh, killing it; a vicious cycle that wouldn't stop until there was nothing else to destroy or she stopped it. With this, _Lelazzo Madraga_ , and _Vainel Ganezza_ nothing and no one would survive.

Not even Hakuryuu.

But as they casted their magic circles, a noise caught Ceara's attention. It was fluid—water rushing towards them. Turning, she saw the king of the Kina Kingdom with reinforcements.

 _So this was what Koumei meant with 'a third country that would aid Hakuryuu.'_

Kina, a part of the Seven Seas Alliance. And it wasn't just him. Another king, a knight by the looks of it, was also there. The instant those two points connected, a horrible thought clicked in her head. And the king's words only affirmed her suspicions.

"We, two kings, have come to assist our fellow ally of the Seven Seas Alliance."

 _Hakuryuu...please, tell me you didn't do what I think you did._

Lowering down as Kouha and Kougyoku did, Ceara stood before Hakuryuu as King Takeruhiko and King Darius stood alongside him. It wasn't until Kouha questioned their belligerent invasion in their civil war that King Darius gave them an answer; it was the one answer she had hoped wasn't true.

"We come to the side of the legitimate ruler of the Kou Empire, Emperor Ren Hakuryuu," Darius Leoxses claimed, brandishing his arm outward to showcase Hakuryuu as he stood between them. "The Kou Empire has already pledged an oath to the Seven Seas Alliance, and became one of our allies!"

"...damn." She couldn't keep the curse from escaping under her breath.

That single proclamation made all of this make sense. Hakuryuu's start of this civil war was nothing more than an excuse for the Seven Seas Alliance to interfere since the beginning. Their creed to 'not invade nor allow themselves to be invaded' played right into Hakuryuu's and their plan.

As did they.

"Such cowardice…" Ceara didn't fail to hear Kougyoku's anger underneath her bated breath.

But her attention from the princess was quickly deterred when King Takeruhiko took a hand to his sword, unsheathing it. "I must aim for the head of the enemy general."

The sword aimed directly at Kouha, Ceara stood beside him with her sound staff held at the ready. A sound barrier would be enough to protect them from anything that the man would hit them with. But King Takeruhiko didn't give them a second to think. Equipping his djinn, he gave one slash, one that broke cleanly through the shield she barely managed to call forth but clearly missed both her and Kouha as it flew between their heads.

" _My king, his objective—"_

Her breath hitched as Kouha called out Koumei's name.

 _No, way. He couldn't have._

 _"With Caim, he could,"_ Murmur told her.

Killing their commanding general would certainly halt things. But she couldn't believe in that outcome yet. Not when this was still three metal vessel users against three. Even if Koumei was indeed hit, even if the rest of the Seven Seas Alliance was on their way to Balbadd like she feared by now, there was still one last thing they could do to stop all of this.

"Kouha, listen!" Ceara called out at the boy as he began to lose his temper in this critical situation. "We must continue. The Seven Seas Alliance won't have a reason to stay if—"

"If we defeat Hakuryuu. I know," His grip on his weapon grew tighter as he turned to tell this to Kougyoku. "Kougyoku, lend me your power."

A horrendous ringing came to Ceara's ears an instant before Kougyoku spoke, her voice distorted and her body contorting. "No...brother…" Hearing the contractions of her muscles and knowing what Kougyoku meant to do, Ceara tried reaching Kouha but was too slow to do so before Kougyoku grasped him in her arms, Vinea's blade leaning dangerously close to his neck.

"W-What are you doing…?" Kouha muttered, utterly confused. "What is the meaning of this?"

Ceara grinded her teeth in anger as a familiar voice spoke through Kougyoku, one she hadn't heard since the battle in Magnostadt. "Prince Kouha, could you please lay down your weapon? It would be difficult for me to bear any more bloodshed…"

The man announced himself and proclaimed his purpose: Sinbad intended to aid Hakuryuu in dethroning Kouen from Balbadd and bring about world peace. What Sinbad intended wasn't far from what Hakuryuu wanted which gave more sense as to why he joined their alliance.

They wanted Kouen off the throne to stop any further wars. They wanted to stop this at all costs.

 _But in the wrong way._

In a sense, they were like she had been. No matter the means, no matter the sacrifice, this needed to be dealt with. This needed to end. Kougyoku was being controlled. Kouha was alone to fight against four. As would she if she fought against them.

Even so, this would end horribly for all of them if this wasn't done. Kouha didn't have the power to fight against them. Not alone.

 _But I do._

" _Ceara. Are you sure about this?"_ Murmur inquired, his voice reverberating in her head. _"With what you're thinking of doing, you could die."_

 _If that risk weren't applicable here, then I wouldn't be doing everything I can to stop this._

If Sinbad and Hakuryuu won, Kougyoku, Kouha, Koumei, and Kouen would be executed. All of them would be. She couldn't let that happen.

 _The one question I have is will you accompany me to die, my friends._

Simultaneously, Ceara heard Beleth, Marbas, and Murmur speak.

" _Always."_

"Then it's settled." Undoing Murmur's equip, she stood bare to them all. Kouha mumbled his confusion and she saw that same puzzlement in Hakuryuu, King Darius, and King Takeruhiko.

"Ceara...?" Kouha murmured in disbelief of her actions, "W-What are you—"

"What I have to," she whispered back before grabbing Beleth's metal vessel and equipping it without a word. Swiping her staff outward without warning gave none of them time to avoid the attack that pushed them away from her.

"Ceara of Eriu, was it?" Hakuryuu asked as he stood with the other two kings beside him. "Whatever noble cause you might think you can achieve is meaningless now. Desist from this futile struggle. You are the same as Ren Kouen. Nothing more than an usurper."

"Unlike him, I am," she admitted as she took a step forward. "Thirteen years ago, I killed my one and only friend and took her place. Thirteen years ago, I met you and the rest of your family and thought that maybe I could live long enough to amend for what I had done. But thirteen years ago is a long time past now. Neither you nor I are the same. You have done terrible things, as have I, and today will be the day we both pay for what we've done."

Concentrating the vibrations around her, Ceara pierced her sound staff onto the ground letting a wave traverse the space around them. The sound intercepted with Kougyoku's mind making Sinbad lose control of her and letting her body fall against Kouha's as she lost her equip. The same vibrations reached the bracelet on her wrist, shattering the crystal.

Without it, Ceara felt the surge of magoi all at once. It was invigorating but within seconds she could feel its heaviness on her and hear the voices that roared to life as the rukh around her became manic.

"Forgive me for this. But if killing you is what must be done to safeguard them, then—"

Her sentence was cut short as King Takeruhiko rushed forward coming face to face with her. A grin came to him, his sword halfway down with his strike at her. Willing it with her staff, Ceara caught the slash of his blade with her sound barrier, the cracks on it making it explode outward and parting them both away from each other.

"Sorry, lady, but that won't be possible. 'Sides, you're betting a lot on just you fighting against the two of us." He raised a fine eyebrow in amusement. "You seriously think you have what it takes?"

"That and more," she admitted. Without a word, she called upon the seal.

The Silver Echoes reacted to her call, the mark burning deeply on her chest as the noise became louder in her head. But before she could do anything, both King Takeruhiko and King Darius rushed towards her to attack. Not having a second to waste, she parried their attacks with her barriers, each breaking and sending them off from which they quickly recovered. Ceara knew that she could easily get Hakuryuu by himself using Beleth's Extreme Magic but with these two bullying her to a corner, it wouldn't allow her to even begin casting.

Takeruhiko had been right on one thing. She couldn't deal with the two of them by herself. She gritted her teeth at seeing no other choice but to change equips. She could stop them using Murmur, but that would only be temporary. Only when using Beleth did her attacks become more powerful. Murmur and Marbas were still the same.

 _Then I'll deal._

But the second it took her to undo her equip was enough for both kings to step forward with the clear intent to kill her. In a split second, just as they stepped forward to strike her down, two blurs took her by the shoulders as they ran at her from behind the kings. Two hands grabbed at her at the same time—one grasping at her neck while the other grabbed at the sword on her hip—as a blur of light and noise took her by surprise.

The moment she opened her eyes, Ceara couldn't understand why they were there, why they protected her. But a part of her didn't want to know. She was just happy to see them.

"Sousei! Suisei!"

Both her siblings stood against the metal vessel users, holding their attacks from reaching her as they used their Household Vessels. Sousei parried Takeruhiko with Sakhiba Shafarat and Suisei held off Darius with Sharisa Bahima as best as they could.

Sousei chuckled under his held breath, concentrating on holding the metal vessel user away from her. Even then, though, he managed to give her a glance over his shoulder, the same cockiness in his grin that she heard in his chuckle. "What? You thought we'd leave you?"

Ceara couldn't keep the truth from escaping her, "I did."

"Well, you thought wrong," Suisei grunted as she struggled to keep Darius back. "We figured things out. We're not dumb, you know?"

"You figured…?"

"We know the truth. Not what Masami told us," Sousei corrected her before her mind ran off to that idea. "We know what actually happened. And most importantly, we know you, Ceara-nee."

The one word made her tear up a bit even during all this.

"We promised each other that no matter what happened, we would always be together to face whatever would come," Suisei called, baring her teeth. "And we're keeping that promise."

"And that's our choice!" Sousei called out forcefully. Out of the blue, Ceara watched an intense light shrouding both of them as their voices carried over.

"Household member born of Beleth—"

"Household member born of Marbas—"

" _ **I surrender myself. Grant me greater power...become one with my body!"**_

Ceara, blinded by the light that emanated from them, brought her arm over her eyes for a brief instant. Once gone, she couldn't believe her eyes as to what stood before her now. It was still them—it was still Sousei and Suisei—but they weren't human anymore.

Sousei took a lithe form, a young man with long, flowing dark ruby hair and long horns sweeping from his ears backward against his head. He held the longsword that his blade became in clawed hands and was robed in white silks from his hips down. His bare chest was marked with red while gold necklaces laced around his neck.

Suisei took a miniature form half the size of Sousei's. But despite it, she held her stance better against King Darius, her overtly large claws digging against his lance. Her fur a dark brown was accentuated with flares of gold, her tail glowing in its golden hue. Golden fur covered her chest and silks were on her hips as they fell to just above her knees and tied off to the side. Her legs were completely transformed into talons and her hands were razor sharp claws.

Her ears perked as she lunged forward, pushing King Darius back before she went on a rampage giving hit after hit to draw him back. Following her lead, Sousei used his long sword to parry against King Takeruhiko, backing him away from their sister. Over his shoulder, the boy smiled and gave her a nod before driving the two metal vessels out of range.

 _Their giving me the space I need._

It was doable. Without them to protect him, Hakuryuu was hers to have.

"Beleth!" she bellowed, her voice carrying the magic that her seal cast across the fields.

" _Of course."_

Taking back Beleth's djinn equip, she stood before Hakuryuu and began casting her Extreme Magic circle. From the corner of her eyes, she the saw a few of Takeruhiko's followers coming forward to stop her. They were too slow, though, as she stabbed the floor with her staff sending off waves of sounds to keep them at bay.

Sousei and Suisei would be able to held those two back for only so long. She had a small window of time to do this, but it had to be right. Her barrier had to last if they came to attack her.

Ceara didn't know if this would work, but she had to try. "Silver Echoes of this world, bestow upon me your gift. Grant me and mine greater power as I give my body and mind to you." The simple call for it worked and she felt it as the voices rang louder than ever, the rukh more manic than before. Her body hurt as if a thousand blades were piercing her from the inside out, but she held onto her staff as she aligned it against her forehead, the rings on it ringing out.

 _This will be enough._

"Grand champion of pride, lay waste upon the conquered and let your mighty warcry surrender them to their knees: _Sijn Altanafur_!"

The small sphere that conjured at the top of her sound staff wavered in shape, its vibrations much too fast to keep contained for long. Ceara wasted no time and struck the ground between her and Hakuryuu, casting the magic and creating the small dome around them that expanded out of proportion. She felt the noise tear her muscles as the dome expanded farther than it ever had, and when it reached its end, she saw the uncontrolled vibrations lashing out, creating blades that spun around and shredding anything and anyone who came close into ribbons.

This would be enough. As she took a step toward Hakuryuu, she noted how he could no longer stand with the vibrations that ravaged his mind. What's more, she felt the muscles in her legs tear and the pain drove her to her knees. The warmness of her blood seeping from her eyes and mouth was more than tangible and Ceara could guess that it was from using Silver Echoes so carelessly.

And she knew that continued usage would tear her open from the inside if she didn't finish this now.

Ignoring the pain, Ceara dragged herself to stand before Hakuryuu. Now only arm's length away, she held tightly onto her staff as the boy glared up at her.

"Y-You," he grunted through gritted teeth, his stance wavering as the vibrations made it hard to speak or concentrate on his balance. "W-What are y-you…?"

"A monster apparently," Ceara replied with a smile despite the blood that she felt seeping from her lips. "Or something to that effect at least. But, in the end, it doesn't matter anymore."

" _My king, hurry,"_ Beleth urged her. _"Your body won't last much longer like this."_

Then this would be the last thing she did. Brandishing her staff, Ceara conjured the vibrations again, this time around the top of her staff to create a razor sharp sound blade around it. Her grip tightened as she looked down at Hakuryuu's glaring blue eyes and her own gazed softened.

Despite what he had done, there was still a part of her that saw him as the little boy he used to be. There was still a part of her that saw him as the young man that wanted to do good, the one that had talked about having made friends after capturing Zagan.

 _But he isn't that boy anymore._

And she had to accept that. Hakuryuu had done too much harm to a lot of people. And he wasn't going to stop until Kouen was dead.

 _I hope you can forgive me, Hakuryuu. And I hope that your sister can too._

Raising her staff, Ceara readied it above his head to lunge down.

" _Kohaku onee-san, why do you pray so much?"_

" _For forgiveness."_

" _You did something wrong, onee-san?"_

" _Yes but I believe that if we try our hardest to amend those wrongs then anybody can be forgiven. At least, I hope I am someday."_

 _His little hands grasped onto her joined ones, smiling as his eyes shone brightly. "Then I forgive you, Kohaku onee-san! That way you don't have to be sad about all the wrong stuff you did and can be happy."_

" _...Hakuryuu."_

Choking on her tears, Ceara's grip wavered as the staff fell from her hands, clattering on the floor in front of Hakuryuu. The pain too much to ignore now drove her to her knees before him as her mutterings increased in volume.

"...I can't…" Teary eyed, Ceara gazed up at him, his eyes wide in shock, as she reached up her hands to cradled his face. "...I can't do it…"

 _I'm sorry, En, but…_

"I can't kill you." Bringing herself closer, she took him in an embrace that she hoped conveyed exactly why.

Despite what he had become and all that he had done, he was still Hakuryuu. He had made all those mistakes but it was still him. He was still the same Hakuryuu that was a part of their family, of their people. And she couldn't do that to someone she knew. She couldn't kill Hakuei's little brother; she couldn't kill Alibaba's and Aladdin's friend; she couldn't kill her own friend.

Even after all she hed repeated in her head, Ceara couldn't bring herself to do what needed to be done. Not when it implied killing him.

 _Even now I can't do what they so easily can. I can't set aside my heart to listen to my mind._

Because despite how much her mind screamed at her to end this all for the good of the many, her heart told her in a quiet yet stronger voice not to. Even after years of working on not listening to it, she couldn't deny it.

Ceara could not kill him.

Feeling her consciousness beginning to sway and the voices ravaging her mind as she began to lose it, Ceara held as tightly as she could onto Hakuryuu.

This war was over. They lost.

"...I'm sorry, En…"

* * *

Overhead where he sat over the cell, Rakah remained hidden from prying eyes using the water magic of the Blooming Waves to keep him that way as he watched the poor woman slowly lose her mind. After six days of not being properly restrained, Silver Echoes seemed to be causing havoc in Ceara's mind and body. Sitting back against the furthest wall from the door of her prison cell, Ceara sat panting heavily and muttering or at times yelling incoherencies to keep her mind as sane as possible.

Despite how much he had wanted to watch the civil war, Rakah had other things to tend to—a little sparrow among them. That last errand did a number on him, too. He had to admit that underestimating a Vastago had been a mistake on his part but one he lived to learn from. At least the woman knew now of their enemy's true nature.

But as devoted as Noé was of a follower, Rakah knew she would find any and all excuses to prove him wrong. It wouldn't be something she would accomplish, though. Not when the truth was on his side. But having her distrust now meant that the usage of his Light magic would have to be limited. From now on, he would have to make his moves as tightly woven as he could have them.

That is exactly what brought him here now: to find the little lamb distraught and on the verge of insanity. Silver Echoes was the worst of the bunch alongside the Peaceful Darkness where penances were concerned. The bearer of either gift would lose their minds one way or another. And as he watched her writhe in her pain, a part of him stirred in familiar grief.

In spite of all that had been done, their pain was never something he wished for. After all, this whole endeavor of his to attain the gifts was to stop their suffering. To stop the pain that was brought upon them by no fault of their own. The only reason he had killed Kijani and the others had been because he'd known of no other way to take their gifts when they wouldn't give them voluntarily. There had been no other way. So he blinded himself to his duty to save them.

And in that blindness, he killed his friends, the woman he loved, and his own son.

" _Surely, there is another way. I know there is."_

A pair of molten gold eyes flashed across his mind which he quickly dispelled with a shake of his head. No, a child like her couldn't understand. She couldn't possibly. This was the way things were supposed to be. This was how things could be fixed.

It was the only way.

The thought let his gaze linger on the woman below him before they shifted to the door that suddenly opened. From it, Reizei Masami entered, anger and grief marring her face. How curious that where he came from the woman had grown to be exactly the opposite of this wretch. The bitch walked up to Ceara more than likely ignoring the pain that Silver Echoes was causing her.

Through gritted teeth, she growled. "I hope you die in here."

Ceara's chuckle filled the room, louder than he expected it to because of the pain she was surely in, before raising her head to meet her gaze. "You and I both."

Masami was unable to contain herself and stepped forward to kick Ceara as she laid there incapable of defending herself. Rakah let his nails dig into the palm of his hands to restrain himself and simply watched from afar as the older woman continued to kick Ceara.

"You were supposed to die in that battlefield. Sousei and Suisei were never supposed to have joined the war efforts, especially not beside you," Masami hissed louder than she had intended to. "Even after all you have done, you still took everything away from us. You've done nothing but tear this family apart."

 _Look who's talking._

But again Rakah held his tongue and instead wondered how the little lamb could be laughing at this point. Usually when badgered like this, she'd retaliate. But it seemed like she was much too hurt to even do that. All she did was laugh and it irritated Masami rather quickly.

"What are you laughing at!?" she screeched.

"That you and I aren't really that different." Ceara laid her head back against the wall, swaying side to side from the dizziness before laying it against her shoulder to speak to Masami. "You and I worked in tandem to rip it apart without knowing it."

"I did no such thing," Masami countered.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night," Ceara replied. "I won't argue with you when you'll never see anything beyond what you want to see. I may have killed Kohaku, Masami, but I at least had the guts to stay and right my wrongs. At least I had the damn heart to not lie when faced with the chance to tell them the truth."

"I never lie—"

"You twisted this all for your benefit!" Ceara shouted and struggled to stand so she could face Masami as the older woman took steps back out of fear. "You never thought of what that would do to them! You only cared about taking your revenge on me!"

"You killed Kohaku!" Masami yelled back, having the strength to fight back. "You started this by not saying anything! Had you told us—"

"You would've killed me, all the same," Ceara said, calming down and falling back to a sit against the far wall. "I guess that's how things will always end."

 _You're not wrong, darling._

It seemed that a lifetime of suffering finally taught her that. Rakah couldn't blame her either. The Silver Echoes along with all the other supposed gifts demanded penance to retain balance. What was gifted to the world had to be the same as what was taken from them—prosperity for the world in exchange for their endless suffering.

And it was exactly what he wanted to put an end to. For all their sakes.

Seemingly tired of the conversation, Masami stepped back, readying to leave her. "As it should. And if the world is just and fair, then Emperor Hakuryuu will see it fit for you to die as well."

 _As well?_

Curious, Rakah, still hidden by Blooming Waves, stepped down to fall just behind Masami to follow after her. Before the doors closed behind them, he heard Ceara's small gasp but couldn't see what she had reacted to. Had she seen him? No, he was well hidden. If anything, the disturbance in the vibrations could have told her something was amiss but nothing else. She wouldn't have known it was him.

Rakah followed after the wretch for a while to witness what became of the civil war this time. Despite knowing the outcome, he knew that they were never exactly the same. Sometimes, the princes died. Sometimes, Princess Kougyoku fought against Sinbad's control. Sometimes, Hakuryuu lost the war.

But in all of them, by the end of the war, Ceara had always come to die. That was the point he was betting on. If she was to die, he could disguise himself as the executioner and make it as quick and painless as he could for her while taking her gift all the same. It would certainly take down two birds with one stone.

This time around it seemed that the twins had chosen differently from before. This time they chose to assimilate fully to fight beside Ceara. That was new. Masami was still alive, as well, which dampened his mood a lot. He never liked the woman; in all, if not most of her incarnations, she'd been a truly vicious woman. One he hated having to work with. It certainly made his job easier, though. But it still struck him as odd that at this point all of the Reizei children were still alive when they had never made it past Kou's civil war before.

 _Why is this one so different than the rest?_

That was the answer he really wanted. If he could figure out why this one out of all the rest turned out so different, then it could help him greatly.

Leaving Masami behind, he stepped out of the way to reach another cell's door, one that was heavily guarded. Must be where Ren Kouen was. And by the looks of it, he wan't alone in there. A ruckus cut his thought short and made him turn in time to step aside from the young magi that bolted through the doors despite the guards trying to keep him out.

Stepping in while avoiding the people was easy and got him inside to hear the back and forth between the magi and Emperor Hakuryuu. Aladdin wanted for him to not kill Ren Kouen; Hakuryuu, however, had his head screwed on bad since a long time past and knew exactly what he wanted.

"I am the one who won! I am the emperor! Therefore...who lives and who dies depends on me."

 _So this is what she meant by 'as well.'_

Rakah hung his head in thought before gazing up to the man in question. Ren Kouen sat in solace and hung his own head in resignation. Well, he was ready to die. Not like he could blame the man. After all this, even he would throw in the towel. But his stakes were much higher than a mere country's future. Before any of them could stop him, Hakuryuu stormed out of the room and, even though he wanted to stay back, Rakah followed behind him as he headed to a familiar cell. The same one he'd been watching over for the last six days.

Smart enough to notice, the little emperor stopped at the entrance of the cell. Rakah watched Ceara from over his shoulder; she had fallen over on her side, breathing heavily and muttering under the gasps that escaped her. Aladdin, finally having caught up, startled at finding her in such a state.

"Hakuryuu," Aladdin called, drawing closer to him, "you can't keep her like this. You're killing her!"

 _He doesn't care._ Rakah watched the little emperor with zeal; perhaps this time Hakuryuu would be the one to make his job easier. If he left her to die like this, he could simply step in and kill her himself to end her suffering.

Hakuryuu called out to the officials that had been following him since his visit to Kouen's cell. The old men stepped forward as he stepped aside to let them through, the old fools cowering before their emperor.

"Have the magicians place the stones in this cell."

Rakah's eyes widened at his order. _What?_

"Hakuryuu…" Aladdin breathed in relief for a small instant until Hakuryuu glared down at him.

"Don't misunderstand," Hakuryuu told him. "She had the chance to kill me but her weakness made her falter. Letting her die now without a punishment for that attempt would be meaningless."

That excuse...Rakah didn't buy it. The boy was ruthless but there was a reason to everything. Anger or hatred, those were the only two reasons why the little emperor functioned right now. There had to be another reason then. Rakah didn't agree with prolonging her pain but he couldn't bring unwanted attention to himself either.

Ceara had to die, and it had to be by his hand if that gift was to be his.

" _Humilitas…please, stop."_

" _Rakah, desist from this."_

 _Be quiet, the two of you._

His hand reached over to his arm where he felt his seal—the Rumble of Thunder—pulsing and heard the voice of those two speaking to him, hers becoming more prominent over his. What a pest she'd become, much more than Arikos when Rakah first began hearing him. After finding out the truth, Rakah knew that Arikos would oppose him. He never understood why or how Arikos, the first bearer of his gift and far-off ancestor, was able to communicate with him. Regardless of that fact, Rakah knew that something wasn't right about the man that spoke to him and taught him how to use his gift. He trusted his knowledge, not his motives. And that irksome feeling only became clearer when _she_ began speaking to him. He ignored their pleas, though, and instead focused on his mission.

Even when he didn't know who or what she was exactly, he knew one thing with certainty: she could be killed. And no matter what he had to do or who he had to kill, he would do his damndest to accomplish that.

" _I wonder…would that really solve anything?"_ Those golden eyes had been gentle and appeared to have so much knowledge in them. He remembered they softened as her mind wandered until a smile spread across her lips that made her look so much like her mother.

In that split second, Rakah swore he had seen Ishtar in the girl's whole demeanor.

" _I don't know, Rakah ojii-san. You and I have seen that same place. And I know that it's a place full of nothing but darkness now. But...that doesn't mean that there was never any light. I'm sure there's hope in there somewhere, and we can find it. We can stop this together in a different way. A way that...won't risk anybody. A way that we can all live happily in the end."_

Her words had betrayed her youth and naivete. There was no such way. There was no way that would avoid their sacrifice or his. This had to be stopped— _that woman_ had to be stopped—at all costs. This relay couldn't continue. He wouldn't allow it to.

And if he had to sacrifice himself and those he once called his friends and loved ones then so be it. Rakah swore he would see this to an end.

* * *

She didn't remember when or how the voices and pain stopped, but they had. Days that felt like months of torture left her somewhat absent-minded and unable to concentrate well. They also left her unable to figure who had walked into the cell just then.

The doors had opened. She heard their footsteps nearing her. But she couldn't see them, her vision blurry from crying out in pain. And yet she still felt the arms that slipped behind her back and knees as they picked her up from the ground.

Her ears so close to their chest, Ceara could hear their beating heart. It was rushing, beating louder than she ever heard, as if trying to pump blood to barren vessels. The sound went away as soon as she heard it, though, as the person who'd been carrying her set her down on the small stool they had placed in the cell.

Ceara's upper body hung forward unable to hold itself straight. A gentle hand put her back straight and allowed her to lift her head and focus on whomever had helped her from the floor.

The first thing that came into view were bright baby blue eyes—one lighter than the other—and a scar covering the left side of their face.

"Haku...ryuu…?" she whispered, her throat parched and tasting of blood.

Lips pursed, he sighed as he bend over before her. The gesture made it easier for her to look at him, not forcing her to lift her neck and aching muscles as much. "You seem more sane."

She chuckled despite the act hurting her throat. "It helps that it's quiet again. Thank you for placing the stones in here."

His grimace became deeper but returned to being the taut line after he heaved a heavy sigh. "Tomorrow is the execution," he told her.

Execution? _Oh, mine._

It made sense to her muddled mind. It looked like Masami would get what she wanted after all.

"What about—" Ceara coughed feeling the blood starting to block her throat but gulping it down to speak. "What's going to happen to them? To Sou and Sui…"

"They'll be imprisoned with the rest of the retainers," he told her, his voice soft to her ears. "They won't be killed."

"Thank you for that…" she whispered.

"Tomorrow," he continued, "you'll be there to watch. That's all I can offer to them as appeasement."

Her brow furrowed at the words she heard, her mind unable to keep up with such simple sentence. _Appeasement?_ "What are you—"

"You spared my life. As emperor, I see it fit to grant you the same."

 _What…?_

"I'm not...going to die…?"

Hakuryuu didn't answer. He simply left her with those words. She couldn't decipher what he meant. She wasn't going to die? But she was part of the rebellion. Did that mean that Koumei, Kouha, and Kougyoku were pardoned too? And what did he mean by 'watch'... Watch what?

Ceara didn't know how much time passed after that, but after awhile, soldiers came to fetch her. Before even moving her, they latched two cuffs around her wrists, making space through the ropes that tied her wrists together. Her mind a little clearer, Ceara was able to hear the rukh that dispersed from her as they stepped out of her cell. Closing her eyes from the intense light of the sun, she heard the roaring crowd before she even opened her eyes.

 _What...is this?_

The soldiers dragged her away onto the stage. She heard the jabs and jeers of the people, none of which she could discern. Not now when her mind was so confused as to why she was being made to kneel before the executioner and not before him.

It wasn't until a set of doors opened and she saw him that her mind finally fully processed what was happening.

This wasn't her execution.

It was Kouen's.

Panic and fear coursed through her and struck her out of her stupor. Ceara tried standing to reach him but the soldiers beside her held her down on her knees as the others brought Kouen to kneel before the executioner. Her cries were muffled through the man who claimed all of Kouen's crimes.

"Lies! Lies! LIES!"

But no matter how much she screamed it, nothing could be heard above the people's roaring voices or the man's claims. As the executioner readied his blade, Ceara couldn't contain the tears that spilled over as she cried for them to stop, struggling as she did. But the moment she lifted her gaze and met eyes of crimson tainted gold, her breath hitched, her body stilling from the intense look.

Those eyes held her still. Those eyes bore into her and got her mind to think. Think of only one thing. One thing that she fought her hardest to get past her parched and bleeding throat.

"I-I—I—"

In an instant, Ceara let out a cry that bled her throat dry the moment the sword swung down and in the end left her words unsaid.

* * *

She couldn't keep her cries quiet, no matter how much she shoved her face against the thin fabric of her robe. Parted away from the rest, Ceara sat in a small room of a ship meant to carry them to an island in Kou territory.

Her, Koumei, and Kouha.

Their fates had been declared alongside Kouen's two days ago: exile while he, as their leader, would be executed. An execution that haunted her every conscious hour after having seen it. Whomever Hakuryuu was trying to appease by having her watch that was the cruelest being she ever met. Even if they didn't know about her feelings, having her alone watch…

 _Why?_

" _You suffer because it's what is fated for you as a bearer of the gifts."_

Ceara gritted her teeth, the sound of them grinding together from her frustration and grief making vibrations in her inner ears.

That voice...it wasn't one she'd heard before. This wasn't one of the multitudes she'd heard when Silver Echoes haunted her. Despite having only heard them in ruckus and in a manic state, Ceara knew those voices by heart. She could tell them apart from any other in the real world. And that made her that much more certain that this one—this woman's voice—wasn't one of them.

It only borne after Kouen's death. The mere thought choked her and let tears pour from eyes anew, tears she foolishly thought long barren.

"Be quiet."

" _I know your grief, Ceara, but you mustn't curse your fate. You cannot fall."_

"He's dead... I could've avoided that!" she shouted, startling the guards that stood but feet away. Ceara didn't care if they thought her crazy. By this point, she thought herself insane anyway.

" _No, Ceara. That was his fate. But you shouldn't taint the memory of your love with bitterness and hatred."_

Easy for her to say when she hadn't watched the man she loved die. That pain was rawer than she thought it to be. But despite the warning, Ceara didn't think this loss would cause her to fall. Some things in the past almost did, she was almost certain of that, but after so much loss she would grieve her piece and live on like she had before.

Overcoming the grief his death came with would certainly take longer than the others, though. Of that she was sure. And she wanted to have her time to grieve.

"...leave me be. Please."

Whoever was talking to her didn't heed her word and instead stayed for a while longer—Ceara could feel their presence despite being unable to see them—and didn't go away until the ship docked.

Dragging her behind them, the soldiers that escorted them to their exile, wrapped the ropes around her waist not bothering to tie her wrists together this time. Ceara covered her eyes from the light of dusk as it hit her obscured eyes. The island they landed on was one she didn't recognize. The young soldier that escorted her informed her that Samon Island was a deserted island to the east of Kou, south of the Eastern Isles. It had been mostly utilized for storage because of its spaciousness but Hakuryuu had deemed it the best place for their exile. According to the soldier, they would be delivered daily goods via ships. Anything else, they would have to conjure themselves.

She supposed it was better than nothing.

Those thoughts ran from her mind when a pink and a dark red head appeared at the corner of her eyes. She watched from the side as Kouha helped Koumei walk towards the house she supposed was where they would live now. Both were tied as she was and it let the young boy help his older brother carry himself. Ceara supposed that Koumei still suffered from the injury he got from King Takeruhiko.

 _At least he's alive._

The bitterness that thought brought to her mind shouldn't have overshadowed the gratefulness but it did. And she hated herself because of it. Out of nowhere, Ceara felt the distinctness of eyes on her and when she lifted her gaze, she caught Kouha's intense glare and it made her stop in her tracks. She had never seen that intensity of hatred in the young boy's eyes. Perhaps back when he was a child and they first met, back when he was still protective of his mother, but even that childish glare paled in comparison to the one he gave her now. This was just pure hatred mixed with sorrow.

Frankly, Ceara couldn't say she didn't deserve it. Koumei seemed to ask Kouha something before following his line of sight. He gave her a glance but there was no malice nor hatred in it. It was just a blank stare. It lasted only a second, though, before he turned to tell Kouha something that got the boy to continue walking.

None of this was unexpected to her. She had the chance to change the course of what had happened. Had she had the guts to ignore her heart and kill Hakuryuu, Kouen would be alive right now. She would be their living reminder of their beloved brother's death.

 _It's like Masami all over again._

Surely they, too, would hate her like she had. It was only natural. Heaving a heavy sigh of resignation, Ceara walked on, following behind them by a good distance. The soldier took her to the room that would be hers and untied the ropes to let her be in the small space. It wasn't empty like she thought it would be. There was a bed with sheets and pillows, a small desk and some extra clothes.

He explained the couple of rules that were imposed on them. First, there would be no contact with the outside. Period. Second and most importantly, they were not allowed anywhere near the port where the ships docked. Logical.

"I understand," she replied. The soldier left then and left her to herself. But she didn't want to be alone, the desire long gone after spending the time she did by herself in the ship. Not now, not anymore. In her selfishness, she went out to seek comfort from the other two people who were hurting just as bad if not more than her from their loss.

Coming without announcement, she slid the door of the room she saw them enter before slightly ajar. Koumei was laying on the bed of the room she supposed would be his, his back raising as she entered the room. Kouha sat by his bedside, apparently intending to take care of his brother's wound when she walked in, and turned only to glare at her when he noticed who had opened the door. Despite the hostility, she wanted to talk—she needed the company—but before she even got to breath again, Kouha stood up and with determined strides reached her only to grab at the neck of her robe.

"Get the fuck out of here!" he shouted vehemently.

"Kouha," she called out, her hand reaching up to try and pry his off of her uselessly. "Please, I just want—"

"I don't care what you want!" he shouted back, his teeth baring and his eyes puffing and beginning to get red. "You—you don't deserve to be standing here alive!"

 _He's right._

No, she told herself. She wasn't about to fall back into that hole of self-guilt again. No matter how much in the right he was of being angry at her and hating her, she wouldn't do the same to herself again.

"I-I know you're angry—"

"Anger doesn't begin to describe how I feel." Ceara was about to start arguing again but stopped, her breath hitching at seeing the tears that sprung from Kouha's glazed over eyes. He was upset, more than that even, but those tears weren't from anger. They were from grief. "It's your fault. You could've stopped this. If you had struck him down, En-nii would be—"

"Stop, Kouha."

Both were startled at hearing Koumei's request to his little brother. Ceara most of all didn't understand were Koumei's composure came from. It wasn't until she stared into his eyes that she saw a look she recognized all too well. It was a vacant stare—like he was there but not actually—one she had seen much of in the mirror the days after Cael's death. Koumei may not be crying like Kouha but he was suffering from his brother's death all the same. Perhaps even more than either of them.

He sighed defeated and asked him to return to his side saying he needed help changing his bandages. Kouha complied, shoving Ceara back and towards the door before returning to his brother's side. As he helped him, Koumei gave Ceara another blank stare. "Don't come back here. Neither of us want to see you right now. So it'd be best if you just stay away."

 _I can't. I don't want to be alone. Not for this._

But she understood his request. It was all she had wanted when Cael and Kohaku died. Yet even when all she wanted was somebody else's company now, she would forfeit that if it would help them.

 _I may have lost him but what we had was one-sided on my part. We were never anything to begin with. But them? They lost a brother._

And she knew and understood that grief all too well.

"If that's what you want." It wasn't anything but a whisper. Reluctantly, she left them and returned to her room.

As dusk began to turn into night, Ceara spent the time locked in the alcove that were her chambers. Appointed dinners were being served for the time being while Koumei recuperated but she skipped this one and instead went out of the small manor.

She'd been told that the southern docks of the island were off limits. They never mentioned anything about any of the fishing spots she spotted out towards the northeast when they first arrived. Figuring that the peace the ocean brought would serve enough as a companion, she walked the shoreline barefooted letting the waves flow and ebb and lick her skin as her feet sank onto the dampen sands.

It reminded her of home. The beaches of Shika were Cael would take her. The shores she would take Kohaku and Sousei and Suisei to.

As the moonlight rose overhead, it shone its light upon the sea, creating a mirror that reflected her face as she stared down at the lapping waves. Distorted. Broken. Sorrowful. Unconsciously, Ceara stepped on the waves as they rushed towards her, wanting to dispel the image of herself. But the more she broke it the more she hated the sight of it when it returned, making her stomp down on the waters more and more until she couldn't anymore. With all her will gone, she fell to her knees on the shore, the ocean coming by to comfort her as she cried into her hands.

This same scenario happened the next day and the day after that. She awoke empty and had no strength or desire to eat, so she didn't which only made her unbecoming nausea worse. From afar, she would watch Koumei and Kouha taking care of one another. From hour to hour, she would check on them from afar, leaving necessities that she saw they needed but were too distracted to get, and always making sure that she was far enough to not be seen by either. And each night when she couldn't sleep, Ceara would head to the far eastern shores of the island. Her intentions always to have the ocean's company but always ending in her hating herself and crying her heart out.

For three nights straight her meager tears added to the ocean. But like she was to the world, they were insignificant to the vastness of the sea. And by the sunrise of the fourth day she had enough. Not waiting til the night, she ran off to the eastern shores, her bare feet clapping against the wet sand as she neared the lapping waves. With her ankles submerged, Ceara bated her breath at the sudden decision her mind concocted.

Living like this...wasn't life. She didn't want to live like this again. Not with this regret and agony corroding her.

The thought had come in passing moments during the past four days along with the plethora of ways she could achieve it. A knife from the kitchen. Goading a guard to do it. Hanging herself. All were possible. But she didn't want anybody to discover her body and be scarred by that. Nobody deserved that. At that thought, her gaze lifted to the vast ocean that stood before her so bright in the morning.

 _The sea will carry me._

All she needed to do was walk towards to bottom. Determined to see it to the end, she distracted herself as she took slow and short steps towards the open ocean. She comforted herself thinking of the good things she'd experienced at sea. The wonderful times she had spent there with her brother, her siblings, and with Kohaku. The thought of seeing them again almost made the sensation of the water brushing against her knees forgettable.

 _Distract yourself. It'll hurt but just divert your attention somewhere else._

One way that always worked came to her mind and as she parted her lips to let her voice echo through the air around her, she felt Silver Echoes thrum within her as her voice escaped.

" _Short steps, deep breaths.  
Everything is alright_

 _Chin up, I can't step into the spotlight—"_

The vibrations were soft against her throat. There was no blood, no pain. It was like Silver Echoes was trying to soothe her in this time of need. _How considerate._

" _She said, "I'm sad,"_

 _Somehow without any words_

 _I just stood there_

 _Searching for an answer_

 _When this world is no more_

 _The moon is all we'll see_

 _I'll ask you to fly away with me_

 _Until the stars all fall down_

 _They empty from the sky_

 _But I don't mind_

 _If you're with me, then everything's alright."_

It'll be over soon, she told herself as she felt the water reach to her thighs, the chill from it running up her body as her wet clothes clung to her legs making her feel heavier. Good, she thought, it would help her sink. Her steps continued slow and methodical, wanting this last breath to persist for a while longer. Just enough to let this sink in before she did.

" _Why do my words_

 _Always lose their meaning?_

 _What I feel, what I say_

 _There's such a rift between them_

 _He said, "I can't_

 _Really seem to read you."_

 _I just stood there_

 _Never know what I should do._

 _When this world is no more_

 _The moon is all we'll see_

 _I'll ask you to fly away with me—"_

As the water reached her hips, Ceara felt the waves starting to sway her body back and forth. Surely the shore would end soon. Surely there would be a sinkhole closeby. Surely once she lost her step, the water would swallow her whole.

 _Surely…_

Another step. Nothing. Another step. Ground. Another step.

The water rippled beneath her but it wasn't because of her steps or the ocean itself. It was her tears again, trying to fill an ocean full of everybody else's sorrow. But as insignificant as they were to its totality, they spilled freely, choking her words as the tips of her fingers broke the surface of the water.

" _Until the stars all fall down_

 _They empty from the sky_

 _But I don't mind_

 _If you're with me, then everything's alright_

 _If you're with me, then everything's alright"_

Another step. The edge.

 _Finally._

"You're really doing this, aren't you?"

His voice shocked her for an instant and got her to glance to her side to see Rakah standing above the water, his feet seemingly gliding over the surface of the ocean's surface.

"I'm tired of this. I'm tired of being sad, of doing everything I can only to stumble and ruin everything in the end. I'm tired...of seeing everybody I love die."

"You would've never done this. The SpeirrI know is a woman who loves life, who cherishes it because she knows what rarity and beauty it is that we even exist. She cherished herself and those she loved, even when they were gone."

"You don't know me."

Rakah took a deep breath and heaved the heaviest sigh she'd ever heard. "...apparently not. You're nothing like what I knew. You're different."

His words confused her but she didn't bother asking why. There wasn't a reason to when just one step would sink her deeper. Ceara was intent on walking past that line and took a step forward but before she could fall, Rakah dropped into the water before her holding her by the shoulders and keeping her feet on the ground. She didn't understand how he didn't sink, not until her mind recalled him standing on the surface of the water a few seconds earlier. His appearance also shocked her greatly. He appeared like a completely different person; his hair wasn't long anymore and instead had been cut to his nape, a small ponytail sitting at his neck and a small side plait falling before his ear with a couple of beads and blood red feathers tinted gold. A long wound ran from the right side of his temple down across his eye and ended at the edge of his lip; it wasn't even scarred. But the shock of his appearance didn't last long.

Shaking herself from that stupor, her hands shot up to her shoulders as she fought to pry his hold off of her. "Let-me-go!"

A whispered 'I'll regret this' came to her ears and made her stop a second before Rakah began talking. "I'm not going to let you kill yourself like this."

"Then kill me yourself!" she cried out, her tears spilling again but this time the sorrow mixing with anger and frustration. Her hand jumped up to her left shoulder, smacking the seal underneath her clothes. "You want this, don't you? Then kill me and get it, you coward!"

A tick ran across his temple but he gritted his teeth through his anger. "Contrary to any belief you may have, I don't actually want to watch you suffer, Ceara."

"Then let me go," she hissed.

"No," he answered, "this isn't you. This is your sorrow talking. This is that kid acting out of grief again. This is you when you don't want to live."

"So let me die already!" she cried out, the air in her lungs spent with the one shout.

"I'm not watching you die again!"

Her eyes snapped wide open at his words, confusion and bewilderment filling her irises. Stuck without words to answer, Rakah simply caught her eyes with an intense glare. His eyes flashed behind her for a second before the glare left them and tenderness, along with slight envy, clouded his sight.

Rakah gave her a crooked smile. "Not when you have so much to live for."

 _So much to live for…?_

Before she could ask him what he meant, he gave her a genuine smile, one she'd never seen on him before. "You've impressed me this time around, Speirr. So surprise me again. Show me that we can live this kind of life, even through the pain. Because if anybody can teach me about the hope the little missy talks so much of...it's you."

Rakah stepped back and vanished in fractals of crystal that mixed in the sunshine. Ceara stood dumbfounded unable to understand his words or actions. After all this time of trying to get what she had, he simply let the chance go.

Chance…

He left her at the edge. He didn't push her away or towards it. It was still her choice.

 _Just one more step—_

" **Ceara!"**

The voice that thundered through the arid morning air reached her ears and rumbled through her shaking body. Her heart stopped the moment it reached her and made her take a step back and turn completely. Far into the shore and several feet away stood three distinct figures under the sun. Two she recognized. The third Ceara swore her mind was playing tricks on her.

But her ears didn't. Her ears heard his voice clearly. And that was enough for her legs to move on their own, running underwater despite the heaviness of the ocean that tried stopping her. But now there was no being washed away willingly. Now she fought tooth and nail against nature itself as it tried to keep her away to reach them—to reach him.

By the minute, she managed to tear herself away from the water, tripping a bit on her own feet as she reached the sand but putting a hand out to catch her fall and pushing herself up instantly to keep running. And just as she reached them and the tears poured down her face, she ignored Koumei and Kouha and instantly threw herself at Kouen, grasping onto him with all her might and not caring that her throwing her full weight at him caused them both to end up on the ground. She ignored Koumei's and Kouha's protests about being rough with him and instead pushed her ear against his broad chest.

 _Ba-dump. Ba-dump._

The mere sound made her cry harder. Ceara lifted her gaze, fixing her position as she pulled back. She had never been happier to see those crimson eyes tinted gold that shone in the light of the morning sun.

"I-It's you," she cried, her sobs choking her at times. Her hands reached up to cradle his face, chuckling as he gave her an odd look. "I-It's really you."

"Unsightly as that thought may be, yes." His reply only made her tears fall faster as her cries mingled with her laughter. Reaching up with his right hand, he took her cheek in his palm and roughly wiped at the tears that came. "Don't be leaving that far into the ocean again. At least not unaccompanied."

Ceara couldn't help the childish way she shook her head vehemently, her loose hair sweeping back and forth with the motion. A smile spread across her lips as her tears began to slow. "Never again. I promise."

"Good," Kouen told her, pulling his hand back to brush the loose strands of her hair behind her ear to clear her face. "Now, if you don't mind, would you let me stand?"

She chuckled and sprung back to her feet while the three of them helped Kouen back up. Ceara barely noticed the strangeness of both his legs and his left arm but was distracted at losing her footing on the wet sand. A firm hand caught her by the arm and Ceara turned up to see Kouha as he fumbled for words. The oddness of Kouha's help made her gaze at the boy as he sheepishly looked away.

"C-Ceara, I wanted to—"

"Don't." She didn't give him time to protest. In the same breath that she spoke, he turned to him and embraced him tightly before pulling back. Turning to Koumei who had the first genuine smile she'd seen in days, she hugged him as well out of happiness. "It's all right."

Pulling back one last time, Ceara gazed up at Kouen who only held the same stoic expression from always. But even through it, she could easily tell that he was just as pleased to see them.

 _Yeah, everything is going to be all right._

Rakah was right for once. She'd been stupid to try this. She had things to live for, if not Kouen, then for Koumei and Kouha, for Sousei and Suisei. For those that were gone and for those that were still here.

She'd been blind to that out of the pain—that always seemed to be the case—but now she saw it clear as day. There was always a reason to keep on living. There was always that one hope to live for. Always. And right now, her hope rested in the three people right here that would need her. That was enough of a reason for her to stay.

A grand smile spread across her lips as she trotted up to Kouen, placing a hand atop the one he was using to grab his cane. "Come, we'll show you around." With a glance over her shoulder, she reached out to Koumei and Kouha with her other hand as a smile spread across her lips. "Shall we?"

* * *

 _ **Three years later**_

* * *

The enthusiasm of that loud voice got Ceara to turn towards the horizon, her eyes scanning far off beyond the shores of Samon Island towards the west. Brushing the long strands of her caramel hair behind her ear, she cupped her fingers against it to make the sound clearer and sharper to her sensitive hearing.

Yes, it definitely came from the west. She hadn't been wrong about that. But that hadn't been the reason why she focused her hearing. Over the past three years, she had grown to ignore the noises that her much too sensitive ears would hear from all around her or from all over the world. But this time, it was different. This time she recognized the voice.

 _And yet...why can't I recall who's it is?_

The perplexity brought by being unable to recognize such voice despite being able to hear it so clearly bothered her. Why on earth could she not remember whose voice that was? Ceara took care to lean against the nearby tree to help her stand up. Maybe if she heard it even clearer, then going closer to the western shores of Samon to see if she could differentiate the voice she heard wouldn't be a bad idea. Then again, she wasn't looking forward to such a long trek when she felt so tired.

Picking fruits from the small western orchards wasn't something she was supposed to do, but she'd been craving some peaches and plums all morning. And since nobody would know which were ripe without her, Ceara had to do it herself. But carrying a semi full basket of fruits in her condition wasn't easy. The way to the orchards was near the house but the western shores not so much, and carrying the basket of fruit with her didn't sound like a good idea.

Especially if anybody found her now. If anybody even saw her outside of that house, they would instantly rat her out. Seriously, even if they had her wellbeing in mind, the restrictions were unnecessary.

All the same, her curiosity wanted to be satiated. Ceara needed to know who's voice she heard that sounded so familiar.

"Cea-nee!"

Ceara froze in place, guilt and fear crawling through her body at hearing that worried yet chiding tone. Heaving a defeated sigh, she turned with the basket in her arms to watch as Kouha ran up the same small hill she'd climbed to get there. His long hair swayed back and forth as he quickly made his way to her.

Before she even got a word out, Kouha took the basket from her hands and began chastising her. "Are you crazy? You shouldn't be carrying this kind of stuff!"

"It's a basket of fruit, Kouha," she countered cheekily and chuckled at the slight pout he gave her. "Besides I was craving some and neither you nor Mei know which ones I like."

"Cravings…" he sighed, reaching his hand out to her to help her down the small hill. "I swear, you and your pregnancy are going to drive us insane with worry."

Ceara chuckled at that comment but could see why he'd say that. Her other hand came over her distended belly that was a much larger bump than some seven-odd months should have given her. But she didn't complain. She was used to it by now.

"You three worry too much."

"We worry enough," Kouha told her, placing her arm threw his so she could support herself on him while he carried her basket of fruits on the other. She was grateful for the support but Ceara always found it odd how much the boy had grown in three years. He was already her height for goodness sake. "You know En-nii hates it when you exert yourself."

"Now _that_ man is the epitome of worrisome," she confided with a sigh.

"Not even," he countered himself. "He loves you. We all do which is why we worry. Especially after what happened."

 _Yeah, I couldn't imagine._ That was the only reason why she let them coddle her like this. After that, she managed to listen to them more about her being on bedrest during her pregnancy. But then again, she could only stay in that house for so long before going crazy. Her and _them two_. If they had anything in common it was definitely her free spirit.

A soft wailing caught her attention as it spread from the center of the island—from their home—outward. Surely nobody would hear it until it got louder. But she heard it; she always did.

Over it, though, a sudden shout caught her ear, one that came again from the west. Stopping briefly and catching Kouha's attention, Ceara stepped back and turned her ear towards the western shores again, cupping her ear and letting the loud voices mingle.

" _...hurrah for her majesty…"_

" _...hurrah for the empress…"_

" _...hurrah for the Kou Empire…"_

A smile came to her lips at hearing that last voice stronger and above all others. _Now that's a voice I recognize._

"Cea-nee?" Kouha asked, a bit confused.

Ceara turned back to him and shook her head. "It's nothing," she assured him and got him to continue walking towards their home. The lightness in her chest at hearing their enthused voices—Kougyoku's most of all after three long years—didn't let the smile falter from her lips. En would certainly love to hear about this later.

" _...mama…"_

But first, there were a couple of cherubs that needed her. Her husband could wait for now.

"I'm coming," she assured in a soft whisper. Surely, today would also be a long day.

* * *

 _A/N_

 _Does it sound like an ending? Well, guess what, it isn't quite yet. There is still one last chapter to go before Silent Lamb ends._

 _Although I'm sad it's ending (I really loved writing this story) I'm also happy that it'll open the door for the future protects in the series. And seeing as Magi is also ending in 4 more chapters, I'd say next chapter will be enough of a farewell to such a magnificent series. I'll spare you all the details and my own personal thoughts on that._

 _I know it's been a long time since the last time I updated, perhaps a month and a half (at most), but now that I have lots more free time in my hands, I can really focus on keeping the ball rolling for this series. So I have good new and bad news about the next chapter (aside from it being the last one). Good news is that it's fully written. Everything, down to its 28k words. It'll be the longest chapter of this story, and any I've written by far. Bad news is that proofreading for this next one might take longer than I thought at first because of three things:_

 _1) It's a behemoth of a chapter._

 _2) I really want to let you guys enjoy this one and ask as many things as you want. Because SL will be ending and new stories will be starting, this and next chapter will be the last that I focus on Ceara's story. So if there was still anything that any of you were curious or confused about, now would be the time to ask. PM or review, I'll be sure to answer. This exempts the last part of this chapter-that'll be delved in on the last one._

 _3) I have lots of fact checking to do. Fun fact: I am freaking OCD when it comes to plots. And because the series intertwines with one another, I need to have a good idea of what the other stories are going to entail (at least in important points) in order to not have plot points later on. Believe me, it's a headache especially since ideas are vague and not that concrete right now. But I will focus on dealing with that the best and fastest way I can to give you guys the last chapter as quickly as possible._

 _Now to talk a little bit about this chapter. I felt like I rushed it, especially with the Kou Civil War arc but truthfully there wasn't much for me to write for it except that added scene. So I guess it got down to just the right size._

 _Sou and Sui were a surprise. A similar scene was outlined but I deviated from it in the end. Masami was originally supposed to be her main obstacle in reaching Hakuryuu. I think I had planned for her to be a household vessel of his that assimilated too quickly like those other generals but went against it in the end. So sorry for those of you who wanted Masami to die and suffer (which was a good amount of you). I don't know if next chapter will be satisfying enough of an ending on that front with the way I wrote the resolution between Ceara and Masami, but at least it felt right to write so that's that._

 _There were two new characters introduced if briefly throughout this chapter(excluding the short snippet at the end). Both will be introduced properly (at least by name) in the last chapter. Both will also be prominent in the series as a whole._

 _And, of course, I'm sure you all are wondering about that whole time skip that happened so suddenly at the end of the chapter. I thought about not putting it there. I really wanted to just cut this chapter short and end it were they reunited and Ceara decided to keep on living. But~ what kind of cliffhanger would that be for a second-to-last chapter. It ends on a happy note for once so that's different_ _（⌒▽⌒ゞ_ _But aside from that, I don't have much to say about it that don't be discussed next chapter. Seriously, there's a reason that thing is 28k and why my wrist now hurts like a MF._

 _Now to give some thanks to the lovely people that Favorited and Followed:_

 _ **-Kaiko Pyon**_

 _ **-GothicVampireLolita**_

 _ **-trouvaille**_

 _ **-annap310**_

 _ **-SoraMythos9276**_

 _ **-NinjaChipmunk**_

 _ **-Candy-orange**_

 _ **-Astrasky**_

 _And also to the great people that Reviewed:_

 _ **-Esmee**_ _: I wish I could give you some more cute moments of the little ones. You'll get little ones next chapter though as that's something to look forward to x3 And yeah, that scene took me some time to write because of how dense they were. But after working so much on building their relationship throughout the story, I saw it was about time for it to happen. And ta-da, I think you got your wish with Kouha's small teasing. And yeah, nice catch on the GOT reference. Watched some of it but not completely caught up.  
And here! Have some Cali sun! o(≧∇≦o)_

 _ **-Avientei:**_ _I answered you already, friend, but I still just want to say hi_ _ヾ_ _(_ _｡･_ _ω_ _･_ _)_ _ｼ_

 _ **-kreizywordsmith**_

 _That's about it for this time. The next time I talk to you guys will be the last for a while. For now, feel free to drown me in any questions you may have. So hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and that you stay tuned for the next and final chapter of Silent Lamb! ( ´ ▽ ` )_ _ﾉ_


	17. Building Bridges

_**Chapter Seventeen**_

 _Building Bridges_

* * *

A stranger.

She'd never seen a stranger here.

The stranger was...strange. And blonde.

Why was he blonde? And why was he undressing? He came in with the ship that came everyday to their home but he wasn't like those other people. He wasn't bringing in the good food that mama and uncle cooked.

"...weird."

"What?"

"Shh," she hissed, her finger on her lips as she turned to her little brother. "He'll see."

"Who?" the little boy inquired. Though he couldn't speak as well as she could—she was good with words and was really smart, or so baba told her—he knew how to ask questions. A lot of them.

"Him," she pointed out from behind their hiding place near a rock. Mama always told her to keep away from the ships. But she always wanted to see them. The sea was strange. The ships were strange. She liked strange things. And that was why she couldn't keep her eyes from the stranger as he walked on, passing by their hiding spot without noticing either of the two.

But the stranger didn't get far. He met up with her uncle Ha and stopped to talk. The stranger knew her uncle?

" _Shushu_ Ha," her little brother said a little too loud, pointing at their uncle. Not wanting to get caught, she grabbed her little brother by the hand and dragged him away. But even when he could walk, running wasn't something he did very well without tumbling. And tumble he did, tripping her and sending them off on a couple of circles before stopping a few feet away from their uncle and the stranger.

The blonde stranger looked confused but Uncle Ha wasn't too happy to see them there. Oh, they were in trouble now.

* * *

 _ **Exile: Year One**_

* * *

It was strange. Ceara had never been one to feel or get sick, especially not for months on end. And it wasn't the best of times to get sick either. After four months things, as well as the others, were starting to calm down.

Kouha had taken well to the life here. Since he had never been one to care about what others thought about him, his attitude in Samon was almost the same as back in the palace. What was changing gradually was his temper. Most of the time, Kouha had been quite a tempest to deal with, one that could roar to life at any second and destroy half a population or simply maim a single person completely. Now he was just a much calmer boy. Seemed like the quietness and proximity to his brothers made him accept his calm demeanor better. It wasn't to say that he didn't lose it at times.

This life also treated Koumei well enough. His wound had already healed, leaving only a palm-sized scar on his chest. His hairstyle also changed. It was actually something that he asked Ceara for help with. Since she was the one that could more or else maneuver a knife without accidents happening, he entrusted her with the make over. She didn't have a reason not to agree. Koumei guided her through most of what he wanted. In less than an hour, his long hair was completely gone and in its place was a stylish look that reminded her very much of Prince Hakuren. Ceara figured; the two of them had been quite close when little. She supposed it was Koumei's way to change for this new life.

Kouen was the one that was having the hardest time adapting. It wasn't so much adapting to this new life that he was having trouble with, either; she swore that as long as that man had scrolls or something new to read, he'd be content and appeased. What he was truly having trouble with was having to adapt to an arm and legs that felt completely foreign to him. Ceara couldn't know what that felt like but simply seeing how frustrated he got at times, sometimes even lashing out at them only to later apologize, made her chest tighten with pity. It was like he abhorred what his body became—she bet it was the uselessness of being able to do nothing about it that frustrated him the most—but it was a feeling that receded when he appeared to understand, time and time again, that it had been his choice to give his limbs to Hakuryuu.

Still, Ceara hated having to see him like that. That day hadn't started all that well, either. Kouen had woken up on a particularly bad mood. She hadn't even left her room when she heard him all the way across the hall, shouting obscenities at the top of his lungs that she had to cover her sensitive ears for.

Surprisingly through these bouts of anger, Kouha had proven the best to calm him down. Perhaps a touch he gained from having to live with his mother for so long _._ And whatever he did usually worked most of the times after a while. But this particular day wasn't one of those times.

Ceara had wanted to help but knew that she couldn't. Not when that morning she had felt like puking her innards out. Again. The worst was that she hadn't eaten anything but still could smell what was being cooked in the kitchen by Koumei. Fish. The smell of it simply sent her stomach hurling.

Not wanting to sour the mood and wanting to find something more appetizing to eat, Ceara left the place without telling anything to anybody and headed west. She remembered some of the soldiers there talking about a small orchard being near the western shores of the island. Fruits sounded delectable right now and the mere idea of sweet, succulent fruits made her stomach feel a little less queasy. The further she got from the horrid smell the better, but the further she went the more she realize that she kept feeling a little too unrested. Not tired, just not fully recovered even with the amount of sleep she had. Ceara twisted the crystal bangles around both her wrists—the permanent shackles that Hakuryuu had left her with if only to let her live that life longer—as she climbed the small hills like the obstacle course they were to get to that hidden orchard.

It shocked her that even this was putting so much strain on her. _I seriously need to get checked out._ The practitioner they had at Samon was good for his old age but as senile as he was, he sometimes had to be reminded by the couple of attendants he kept around about what he'd been doing. His judgement wasn't one Ceara trusted much, not unless those same attendants that would eventually take over his job agreed with whatever conclusion he came up with. But with the way she'd been feeling these past months, she'd even take the kook's word at this point.

That would come after she ate something, though.

It certainly took Ceara longer that she first thought to reach the orchard, if one could call the place that. It truly was just a bunch of different trees that had been fenced off. By the looks of it, they were trees of different fruits too. Not all were in bloom and even less were bearing any fruit. Thankfully, the one that was was the lone peach tree that stood somewhat apart from the rest. Walking past the fence, Ceara grabbed part of her robe as a makeshift basket and picked some peaches from both the ground and low hanging branches. Those were the best by the looks of it. Tender but hard all the same.

 _Just peachy._

She chuckled at her own joke and picked more as she bit into one of them. They were amazingly sweet and did just right by her stomach as her nausea began to fade away. Five minutes and two and a half peaches later, Ceara thought that she had enough to last her for a couple of days and began heading back home. Surely by then, things should have calmed down. Or so she hoped.

"Oof." A careless misstep down the hill brought her down. Ceara let go of her half-eaten peach and the hold on her makeshift basket as she fell to clutch at the ground to keep herself from rolling down the small hill. Once she came to a complete stop, she sighed heavily. How clumsy of her.

 _I should really be more careful._

"Ceara!"

At hearing Kouha's voice from afar, she gazed up to see the boy waving his hand over his head as he wandered her way. If he was there, then the whole fuss from this morning should be over with. That was good news. Now her problem would be to get those peaches she dropped back. In a complete hurry, she got up quickly but as soon as she stood up a sudden spell of dizziness hit her hard enough to render her back to her feet. She heard Kouha shout but ignored it as her whole world spun for a full second. By the time, Kouha got there the spell was mostly gone but she could still feel her head light.

Kouha rushed to her side and grabbed her arm to help her up. "Ceara, are you okay?"

"Y-Yeah, I think—" But the dizziness came back with a fervor when he pulled her up. "Slow down. I'm dizzy."

"You look sick, too," he added with worry etched on his face. "Here, let's go back and see Old Man Zhu."

She didn't want to but it felt like a necessity at this point of complete absurdity. Ceara was clearly not in the best shape and she wanted to know why. Kouha accompanied her to Zhu's lodgings on the west side near their home and the old man welcomed them with open arms and an expression of concern at seeing Ceara's state.

"Sit her, my lord. Slowly." Kouha did as he was told and set Ceara down on the stool. Zhu went about examining her with his two attendants helping him out. After checking her out, he asked a few questions. What surprised her was the fact that the few he asked were things that hit straight to everything she'd been feeling for the past few months. Her nausea, her loss of appetite, and her tiredness were all things he pointed without hesitation.

"Master Zhu," she asked a bit better now that she was sitting down and offered a glass of water. "You seem to know what's wrong with me. Is it treatable?"

The old man had the audacity to laugh heartedly at her problem, something that neither she nor Kouha were appreciative of. And Kouha was the first to tell him.

"Spit it out, old man."

"Sorry, sorry," he mumbled, coughing a couple of times into his sleeve. "No, child, you are completely healthy. Just burdened."

"Burdened?" she repeated, not understanding.

"Yes, yes," he continued, "It'll last some months more but the nausea should subside after a while. You seem to be craving lots of sweet things, I see. Yes, that's a good sign that you're both healthy."

"Um," Ceara hummed, trying really hard to decipher what the old man was saying. Although a part of her had an inkling of what he meant, Ceara didn't want to admit it. Not without some concrete confirmation. "W-What do you mean by b-both, Master Zhu?"

The old man stroke his beard pensively before a chuckle came from him. "Why, you and your child, of course."

 _Oh goodness. I heard him wrong. I must have. He didn't just say that._

Her mind repeated those same questions as Zhu spoke to her and Kouha. Her mind half-listening, she noted that there would be quite some limitations for her aside from other things now that she was... _with child._ Ceara had to ask him a couple of times to make sure and even ask his attendants to make sure that he wasn't going truly senile this time.

But no. He wasn't wrong. She was with child.

 _I'm...going to be a mother?_

The thought made every horrible feeling evaporate into thin air as her hand came close to cradle her stomach. Now she knew what the tiniest bump in her abdomen was. Now that she looked for it, she found it. That bump...that was a life. It was growing inside her.

 _It's my child and—_

"Dear gods…" She had overlooked when they departed from Old Man Zhu's lodge but stopped all at once in the middle of the path home when that heavy thought crossed her mind.

"Ceara?" Kouha asked when he noticed her stopping. But she didn't listen. Ceara was still lost in the thought of telling _him._ And to her amazement and shock, Kouha seem to know exactly what she was thinking. "Are you sure it's his?"

At hearing this, her head snapped up with tears prickling at the edge of her eyes. "There's no one else that it could be...I-I-I've never been with anybody _besides_ him! Oh gods…how am I going to tell him…?"

"You could always just tell him, you know?" Before her anxiety and panic could shut his idea down, Kouha raised his arms up in mock surrender and continued. "No, hey, listen to me here. He's not as insensitive about things as you think. Especially not now."

"But this will only be more trouble. He's already dealing with enough stress having to cope with all that's happened. Telling him this could just make things worse."

"Or it could makes things more bearable. Have you thought about that?"

"How in heavens could it do that?" she asked, actually sounding desperate for an answer. "It's a _child_ , Kouha. Kids seldom make things easier." From her experience, they often made things a lot busier not easier.

"En-nii is a sensible man, Ceara," Kouha assured her with a small smile. He gently took her arm and wrapped hera over his to guide her back as she continued to freak out. "I doubt he will not pay attention to you. Especially not when you're carrying his kid."

"Oh gods…"

"Relax," he said and soothingly patted her hand on his arm. "You'll make yourself feel worse, and you heard what Old Man Zhu said. You need to take things easy for right now. It won't do either of you any good."

"Either of whom any good?"

Both her and Kouha froze immediately, although the latter didn't know why, when they heard Kouen's voice rise over their conversation. They'd been so into their own little talk that they had failed to notice they had arrived near the house. What was worse, Koumei was helping Kouen out on a walk like he usually did. Neither of them noticed or recalled that small yet important detail.

Out of panic, her nails dug into Kouha's arm. He cringed slightly but patted her hand to try to calm her down and get her to loosen her grip. With a small push, he urged her forward. Ceara took the few steps but kept her glance askance.

"Ceara?" Hearing him say her name only made her growing anxiety tenfold. "Is something the matter?"

Yes.

 _You can't do this alone. And he deserves to know. It's going to be his, too._

Relegating herself to whatever may come now, Ceara took a deep breath before lifting her gaze to meet Kouen's. "T-There's something...that I need to tell you…"

* * *

When Alibaba came to Samon Island after Kougyoku told him that Kouen was still alive, he expected to find Koumei and Kouha there. And although they weren't what they were three years prior—nobody seemed to be—he found them just like he thought he would.

What he didn't quite expect in his wildest dreams was seeing two toddlers in the island. What was more was their uncanny resemblance to the Kou siblings, especially to Koumei. But something told him that that was a wrong conclusion to make. Although both the girl and boy, siblings from the looks of it, had uncanny fiery red hair, they also had the brightest blue eyes Alibaba had ever seen.

 _Not true. I've seen those eyes somewhere before._

But the more he thought about it the more he couldn't seem to remember. The unmistakable feeling of stares brought to his attention the tiny pairs of blue eyes boring holes into him with their gazes.

The young boy that was perched on Kouha's shoulder as the younger Kou sibling carried him suckled his thumb as he laid his head against his shoulder and watched Alibaba. The little girl, too, who trotted beside Koumei to keep up with him as he took her by the hand would constantly throw curious glances behind her shoulder at him.

Both stares gave him a fright and sent a chill up his spine, almost like needles prickling at his back. Why? Why were a couple of children making him feel uneasy by their mere gazes? Alibaba shook his head out of that feeling knowing that he had other things to concern his mind with. That thought settled once Kouha and Koumei led him to the small study in what he assumed they had called home for the past three years since their exiled. In that room, he found the man he had sought after.

"Long time no see!" Alibaba called a bit surprised but glad to see him nonetheless. "To think that you're still alive, Kouen."

Kouen grinned, his aged appearance surprising Alibaba somewhat. "It took you three years to answer my summons. You're a little late, Alibaba."

The seriousness of their encounter, though, shattered completely when the little girl let go of Koumei to run over to Kouen. Reaching him, she tugged at Kouen's robes and raised one hand to grasp out towards him.

"Baba, pick Haku up."

Alibaba understood what she said but didn't quite hear the first word. What did 'baba' mean? Kouen however didn't seem confused and instead asked, "What do you say?"

The little girl smiled with some of her teeth showing. "Please!"

Alibaba couldn't believe his eyes at the genuine smile that came over Kouen's features, softening them somewhat as he reached his normal hand out to the girl. Gleefully, she took it and wrapped her arms around it before Kouen easily lifted her onto his lap. Crawling up, she nestled against his shoulder, wrapping her tiny arms around his neck and kissing his cheek.

"Thank you, baba."

"My pleasure," he quietly responded, letting her be with his arm cradling her against him.

"Baba! Yuu too!" the boy suddenly cried out, stretching his arms away from his mouth and Kouha to reach out towards Kouen.

Curiosity winning him over, Alibaba leaned in to Koumei to ask, "Hey, they called him 'baba?' What does that mean?"

Koumei scoffed but smiled as he answered. "It's an endearment in Kou's language. It means father."

 _Oh. Father._

Then it sank in.

" _ **FATHER!"**_

The little boy, Yuu, jumped in Kouha's arms scared at being so near Alibaba when he shouted. Tears began to well up in his eyes and soon enough he broke out into a loud wail.

"Oh, sorry," Alibaba apologized, wanting to calm the boy down but only making him more frightened at approaching him.

"Yuu-chan, don't cry. It's okay," Kouha cooed but was ignored as he wailed harder, this time calling for 'mama.'

As if summoned by his cries, the doors to the study opened and Alibaba only saw a woman walk in straight to Kouha before taking the boy into her arms.

"There, there," she hummed under her breath, bouncing on her knees in a soothing motion for the boy. Her long caramel hair swayed back and forth as she did this and stark blue eyes came in and out of his view. As if by magic, the little boy's cries stopped in an instant and were reduced to a few hiccups as his thumb returned to his mouth and he laid his head on the woman's shoulder. "There, that's a good boy." Finally, the woman turned to face them, her look more than peeved. "Now, can someone tell me who shouted so loud to make him cry?"

Both Koumei and Kouha pointed at Alibaba who simply looked at the two siblings before sheepishly rubbing the back of his head. Once his eyes landed on the woman's face, though, both their eyes widened at seeing one another.

All at once, their voices rose a bit too high.

" **It's you!"**

"It's you I heard," she called out shocked but was drowned by Alibaba's much louder exclaim.

"You're the general from Kou!" Alibaba called, finally remembering her. "You're Miss Reizei Kohaku."

"No!" Alibaba shrunk at the high shout that came from the little girl at Kouen's side. Her cheeks puffed, the little girl glared back at Alibaba. Seeing that glare finally made him understand why their stares had been so bearing on him. _They look just like Kouen._ "Haku is right here!" she proclaimed clapping a hand against her chest. "Mama not Haku. I'm Haku."

The woman he knew as Kohaku chuckled nervously but nodded. "Yes, Kohaku, you're right." The young woman turned to Alibaba then with a smile. Finally, he got a good look at those stark blue eyes, the same ones on both children. "And sorry but my real name is Ceara of Eriu." Still holding onto the boy, she reached one hand out, "Nice to meet you again, Alibaba Saluja." Alibaba returned the gesture and shook her hand with a small 'nice to meet you' but retracted when a crooked smile came to her lips. "Although, it's kind of weird to say that to someone who's supposed to be dead."

Alibaba chuckled at that. That was something he'd have to get used to, he supposed. "I suppose so. That aside, I'm surprised. Never knew Kouen and yourself were together back when I first met you in Kou."

"We weren't," she said rather simplistically and bubbly. "Some things happened after our exile, and we've been together for the past three years. We actually married not long after we found out little Kohaku would come to our world." That explained some things. She walked over to Kouen's side and reached down to the little girl. The toddler jumped up from Kouen and accepted the ruffling of her head with a giggle. The little boy's cheeks puffed as his grasp on her got tighter. Miss Ceara bounced the little boy once more as she cooed at him before speaking. "And Yuu came a year after. He's our youngest one as of now at one."

Yuu raised his head and picked up his hand to show off two fingers at her mother's face. "Yuu is two."

She chuckled and cradled her son closer to her making him giggle too. "Yes, that's true. You're going to be two next month."

Alibaba still couldn't believe the familial scene he saw before him. He watched as Miss Ceara argued childishly with Kouha who jogged up to her wanting to take little Yuu away from her. Neither she nor the boy that clung so tightly to her were yielding to his request and Kouha seemed to be running out of ideas to convince her.

"Ceara, you shouldn't be carrying Yuu," Kouen told her, finally intervening in the familial dispute.

Miss Ceara pouted at this, turning to him this time with a slight frown on her features. "He's not heavy. Carrying him won't hurt me or the baby."

"Baby?" Alibaba repeated. It wasn't until she turned again to face him fully this time that he noticed the large distended belly of hers that he somehow failed to see when she first walked in. "Another?"

Ceara couldn't do anything but smile at him. "What can I say? I grew fond of big families." Her hand reached out to Kouen's hand, one he took into his without any thought whatsoever. "Besides, we owe Kouha a godchild."

"Damn straight you do," Kouha called out, hands on his hips. "After that fiasco with Yuu-chan you don't get to disown me with this next one."

"Yes, yes," Miss Ceara cooed, trying to appease the older man like she did her children. But after that, she turned to Alibaba with a knowing smile. "But I'm guessing that's enough of that. After all, I think you came here with the intentions to speak with En." She turned to her daughter then and patted her head, "Come along, Haku. Let's leave your father to speak to this nice big brother, all right?"

"No," Kohaku called out, clinging onto Kouen's neck fervently.

"Kohaku," Kouen chastised, but the girl still didn't flinch and instead buried her face further against her father's shoulder.

Miss Ceara sighed and scrunched her nose for a second before a thought came to her. "How about we go for a walk on the beach?"

Both tiny heads turned up to their mother, their faces bright with excitement. Kohaku climbed down from her father while Yuu tugged at Miss Ceara to put him down. Once both were on the floor, they reached up to their father's robes and began to pull.

"Beach! Beach! Beach!" they chanted together, pulling at Kouen every time they called out.

Kouen lifted his gaze up at Miss Ceara with a raised brow. "This is your plan to give us time?"

"You'll have some once we reach the beach," she pointed out. "They'll run off to play and we'll have time to hear out Alibaba. After all," she said turning to Alibaba with a curious gaze, "I want to know what this young man has done to bring our Kougyoku so much encouragement. Don't you?"

Alibaba couldn't help wonder how Miss Ceara knew he'd gone to see Kougyoku first. But that thought quickly dispelled when he heard Kouen sigh and give her a small smile. Simply seeing him so expressive like that was strange, especially because he'd been such a stoic man before.

With her and Koumei's help, Kouen stood on his legs; Alibaba couldn't really tell what was wrong with them but the cane certainly told him that something wasn't right.

Once he stood up fully, the children squealed and ran up ahead to run around the door waiting for him. Miss Ceara stayed by his side to help him but Kouen and Koumei argued with her saying that she shouldn't. Seeing a place to intervene, Alibaba stepped up and took Kouen's artificial arm.

"I have him," Alibaba assured her with a smile.

Miss Ceara smiled and nodded asking Koumei for help herself. Kouen sent him to her and he dutifully went, letting them go ahead as Kouha caught up with the two toddlers and Kouen and Alibaba took their time. The children, seemingly knowledgeable of where to go, guided the way to the eastern shores of the island.

* * *

Kohaku bounced with every other step as she trotted ahead. Her little feet carried her towards the waves as they ebbed into the ocean, and she squealed in delight as she ran away from them as they reared back onto the sandy shores. Yuu tried mimicking her but since she was much faster than him, he cried out to his sister to slow down as the water lapped against his legs. Kouha chastised them from behind, telling them not to go too deep into the water. The two called out in unison but neither seemed to want to listen in actuality.

Ceara couldn't help but chuckle at her children's habits. They reminded her too much of herself. But as they were being watched over by Kouha, she focused more on listening in on what Alibaba had to say. Kou was on an economic downfall. And although he was trying to help, he needed the magic research that Kou had been working on.

She knew very little of that subject. She'd known such things existed, it was why there were dungeon monster corps in their military to begin with and why artificially made magicians like Kouha's attendants existed. Despite knowing this, Ceara never really sought out to learn more about it.

But she was sure that the three brothers knew. And Alibaba thought so too. It didn't make it that less surprising that he asked Koumei to return with him to Rakushou and to Kou, though.

"You're asking a pretty hard thing," Ceara admitted right after he spoke. "What you're asking could easily dismantle Hakuryuu's and Kougyoku's reign and its legitimacy. Especially because you want to bring former princes of Kou who've been accused of murdering the emperor and the crown princes."

"Our sister is right." Ceara sighed in defeat at hearing Koumei say that. She never liked him calling her so formerly. Kouha's nickname was cute, one she actually liked. Koumei's felt a little more forced, one he assured her wasn't. Ceara didn't believe him though. "If such criminals as us return to Kou, the legitimacy of their reign will suffer a great blow. It would cause an uproar and it could risk our nation falling into civil war."

"It's not like you'll be returning as princes."

 _Huh?_ That certainly caught her off guard. It wasn't until Alibaba explained himself further that she understood. They wouldn't be returning as princes. They would still be there as exiles, as criminals, and would be treated as such. It certainly could work but…

"There are no problems then." Her train of thought stopped when she heard En move, landing a firm hand on Mei's shoulder. "In that case, take him with you. I ruled in times of war. Koumei will be a suitable ruler in times of peace. Since the beginning, I had thought of leaving the Imperial throne to him once the war was over..."

Ceara smiled at that. Certainly sounded like something he would do. And apparently Kouha knew while Koumei hadn't. Thankfully, there wasn't a need to convince Koumei once Kouen put his two cents in.

"Mama! Mama!" Ceara turned at the voices that called out to her. Kohaku ran up to her with Yuu trotting behind her as the two carried shells they found that had been washed up by the shore. Putting more attention to them than to the conversation, she failed to notice when Alibaba received a call. More importantly, from whom. But there didn't seem to be any hostility when Alibaba spoke to Sinbad. In fact, there was this strange easiness with which he spoke with that she kept hearing.

She certainly agreed with Kouha when he said that Alibaba said whatever came to his mind. But despite this span of insanity, Ceara had to admit that Alibaba's argument was sound. Be it its people, criminals, or princes, they were all property and assets of the Kou Empire. And as such the empire should be able to use them as it saw fit for its own prosperity. But the argument seemed to be escalating and it turned into a loud rumble that even she could hear. Even her children, susceptible to emotions at such young age, whimpered and clung to her in fear as Alibaba raised his voice.

But just as fast as it rose, it quickly became normal again. Somehow he convinced Sinbad. And just like that, her brother-in-law decided to depart their small island.

"Is _Shushu_ Mei leaving?" Kohaku asked her, her face expressing the confusion she felt with all the commotion that was going on.

Oh, this would be hard. Kohaku loved her Uncle Mei. But she wouldn't lie to her. Bending down as best she could with her stomach as it was, Ceara cradled her little girl's cheek in her palm. "Yes, sweetie. Uncle Mei is going back home."

"But…" Kohaku spoke a bit confused if her frown was anything to go by. " _Shushu_ Mei's home is here. With Haku and Yuu. And Mama and Baba and _Shushu_ Ha, no?"

Ceara knew this would be hard to explain to her as attached as she was to her uncle but she'd have to try. Before she had the chance, though, a firm hand rested on her hip which got her attention.

"En?"

Kouen glanced at her before gazing down at his children who looked up at him confused and downtrodden by the news. "Your uncle won't be going by himself. You, your brother, and your mother will accompany him too."

Now Ceara was just as confused as her children, although who was sadder about the unexpected news was anybody's guess. "Wait, what?" she whispered unable to understand what he meant.

"Mama's going too?" Kohaku cried, her tears welling up as she gripped Ceara's robes tightly.

"Mama no go," Yuu called out doing the same as his sister, already crying.

"You have to," Kouen told her, setting his children's worry aside for a minute.

"Like hell I do." She hated cursing in front of them but this wasn't the plan. This wasn't even close to what was decided. Only Koumei was needed back in Kou. He knew enough. "There isn't a need for me to go."

"There is," he corrected her. It wasn't until his hand came to lay on her distended stomach that she understood why. "There's nothing assuring us that what happened with Yuu won't happen again."

Ceara frowned at that, her own hand coming up to her unborn child before her eyes came down to her youngest son. Yuu lifted his face, tears staining his beautiful chubby face and obscuring his bright eyes.

Yuu's birth—what he spoke of she didn't recall. All she did was seeing her son well and healthy before passing out and then suddenly waking up with a jump of her heart. _And a voice._

Regardless of what did or didn't happen, Ceare knew that the incident had changed the three men she lived with. All of them worried to an extreme after Yuu's birth and became almost paranoid after she found out she was with child yet again. They feared for her unborn child, those already born, and herself. They didn't want for her to be gone from any of their lives.

"It's a precaution, Ceara," he told her under his breath, "They need you alive."

"And they need their father," she corrected him with a frown but felt the sting of the tears on her eyes. Using the heel of her hand, she wiped them away wanting to make her point without getting emotional. Damn her mood swings. "I need you."

"You'll come back," he assured her, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. "This will only be until after they're born and we're assured you will be fine."

She didn't want to leave. She really didn't. After three years of this, she had grown so used to it. Finally, she had a family again, one that loved her as much as she loved them. And now he wanted to send her away. Despite all this, the saner part of her also knew that he was right. This might actually be the best choice for her and their child.

"Fine," she agreed with a heavy sigh and gave him a pitiful excuse for a smile. "But I'll have you know that I'm not happy about doing any of this."

"As long as I know you are in the best hands possible, I'll manage with that resentment," he assured her, laying his forehead against hers.

"I no wanna go!" their daughter's cries rang through the air catching both their attentions. "I wanna stay with baba! _Shushu_ Mei no go too!"

Ceara couldn't keep the sigh that escaped her. Convincing her was one thing; convincing Kohaku and Yuu that they needed to leave with her would be another. Despite how much Kouen told her otherwise, he was a wonderful father and one their children loved to no end. Kohaku and Yuu would be fine in either of their hands. The thing was that Ceara didn't want to leave them. It was her overprotectiveness all over again. Leaving them here for months would be hell for her just as much as it would be for En. But he seemed to be able to swallow that heartache as he knelt down with trouble to reach Kohaku's and Yuu's line of sight.

He cradled their daughter's cheeks as she cried with a scowl on her face, her glaring eyes resembling his.

"You won't be gone forever."

"Liar," she spat, sticking her tongue out.

"I swear it, _baobao_ ," he said, using his other hand to round up Yuu near him as well while still holding his cane. "This is actually something important that I'm tasking you two with."

"Dasking?" Yuu repeated, mispronouncing the word.

Somewhat seeing where her husband was heading, Ceara used him as support to kneel down before them as well. "It's a very important job, Yuu."

"You will go with your mother and keep her safe."

"Keep mama safe?" Kohaku asked.

Kouen nodded and patted her red head. "Your mother needs to leave to have your baby sibling somewhere safe."

"Home is safe," Kohaku corrected him with a quiet sniff.

"It is, Haku," Ceara confirmed and wiped the girl's eyes of tears with her sleeve. "But your father and I want to be sure that your baby brother or sister is okay. And that mama is going to be okay too. Do you get that?"

"Is it because of Yuu?" she asked.

Ceara tried her best not to cringe. It amazed her that Kohaku remembered what had happened when she hadn't even been a year old. She wasn't wrong but neither of them wanted to admit that and make their son feel bad or to feel like he was the reason all this was happening. "No, sweetie." She reached out with her arms and both children ran up to her and clung tightly to her while Kouen stroke their heads soothingly. "Never think that. Nothing we do is ever your fault. This is just to make sure mama and your baby sibling come home healthy." A new idea came to her at that word. "You guys remember how I tell you to always eat all your vegetables." There wasn't an answer to that, only a couple of nods. "The reason for that is so that you're healthy and don't get sick. And well, what mama and baba are doing now is making sure mama is healthy by going with Uncle Mei."

"Good food?" Yuu asked seemingly understanding the core idea of what she meant.

"Yes, Yuu," she assured him, "And good people who will help mama and your baby sibling be okay. And once your baby sibling is here with us, we will come back to baba."

"We promise it's just for a while," Kouen added, wiping Yuu's eyes as he lifted his gaze to his father. "Just until your mother and sibling are well. After that, you'll come back."

" _Shushu_ Mei too," Kohaku corrected with a puff of her cheeks.

Ceara couldn't help but sigh in relief. That Kohaku was being cheeky meant that she was going to go along with this, no matter how stubborn she would be against it. Yuu only nodded in agreement with his sister and broke from their mother's embrace to hug their father. Kohaku sniffed and hiccuped but did the same, both hanging onto their father like they would never see him again.

 _They will. This will only be for a little while._

She had to convince herself of that too. Her sensitive ears caught En's soft 'I love yous' to their children and that just touched her heart. He had always been a loving person despite never really showing it. Once they had Kohaku and Yuu, those things flourished like never before. Even Koumei and Kouha thought it strange but not unlike him. He always had been like that deep down and the three of them knew that.

Kohaku pulled back from their embrace and rubbed at her face with her sleeve before looking at her father with a determined expression.

"Haku take care of mama!" she proclaimed with slightly puffy eyes.

"Yuu too," he commented, wiping at his runny nose but with a little of his sister's determination seeping into him.

"Good," Kouen said with a smile. "I'm sure you two will do a great job. So take care of your mother for me, all right?"

"Yes!" they exclaimed in unison, grabbing onto their father's hand tightly.

Ceara turned to Alibaba and the others who had witnessed this whole scene unfold. With a somewhat forlorn smile, she responded, "We'll be accompanying you as well, Alibaba. Although it'll be for a shorter time than Mei, do take care of my children and I."

Alibaba grinned before nodding. "Of course."

He was a good kid. Three years hadn't changed that. Surely, if anybody could, he would be able to help Kougyoku restore Kou to its former glory. Her hand came to her stomach and the child that she carried. Ceara knew their concern had ground to stand on, but a part of her still thought of it as unnecessary. Then again, she didn't remember much of Yuu's birth unlike Kohaku's. But she saw the fear and panic in their eyes, especially Kouen's. _That_ was real.

Whatever happened that she couldn't remember had scared them to death. She didn't want to be the cause of that again. And if she and her children had to leave Samon Island—leave home—in order for them to be if only a little bit more at ease, then she would swallow her own anxiety and go.

 _It's only until you're born and healthy, my star._

Only to make sure that what happened didn't happen again.

* * *

 _ **Exile: Year Two**_

* * *

A year had passed already since their exilement and in that short year not only did she find herself with child but that its father was a man that had accepted her just the same.

To her surprise, Kouen had been the one to suggest they wed. Ceara didn't know why; her first thought was that it was so the babe wouldn't be a bastard and fatherless. But Kouen dashed those ideas when he told her the real reason why. He had denied for long enough, he told her, but he had to accept what others saw in himself. He had to accept that he did indeed feel something for her.

Ceara didn't want to bring her hopes up. It didn't help to when things were in such fickle state. But this life changed more than just their statuses, it changed their minds. Or what Ceara liked to believe better, it allowed them to be who they truly were. It allowed them to be human. And it allowed Kouen to tell her he loved her and their child she bore.

She was about six months along when they held the ceremony. It was quaint, small, and Ceara loved every second of it. Not three months later did she birthed the little cherub of hers: a girl that she named after her dearest friend, a choice that her now husband agreed with.

Ren Kohaku was the first to be born. Days ceased being quiet ever since their little girl's birth. Kouen could not have been happier in her opinion. She never saw him actually smile that warmly until after Kohaku's birth. Neither had she seen him return to a semblance of who he used to be so quickly; it was like the frustrations from before had been set aside so that he could care for Haku. Kouha had been right. Kohaku's birth had indeed made things better.

Imagine their surprise and shock when just six months later they found her with child yet again. Kohaku was not a babe of a year yet when Old Man Zhu told her that she was once again about four months along. There was glee for sure—who knew she was this fertile?—but there was also explicit concern from Zhu. Too close, he'd said pensively, and that precautions should be taken. And they were. During her pregnancy with her second child, she enjoyed the leisure time raising Kohaku the best she could while remaining at home resting. There was no more trips to the orchard, the beach, or kitchen for her. Then again, Ceara had her hands full with the little sun that had been born into their lives. Her smart little girl that reminded her way too much of her husband.

But all the precautions in the world didn't prepare them for what happened. She remembered little of that early godforsaken morning. Zhu and his assistants ran through like clockwork just like she'd seen them the first time around. Some things had been easier the second time around—things like measuring the pain or the right times to push—but the amount of pain was unexpected. She recalled being in pain before but birthing Kohaku had not hurt as badly as this. But she ignored it as best she could and instead focused on the laborious task of birthing the child.

She lost track of time after five hours. In the early dawn, Zhu finally told her that the little babe was coming. Just one more push.

"It's a boy." She couldn't believe she heard that over her pain and lightheadedness. But her giddiness was short-lived when she failed to hear the most beautiful sound ever. Her baby boy wasn't crying.

"W-Why—" she croaked, her head spinning as she tried pushing herself up. The women put her down wanting to calm her down but Ceara struggled. Why? Why wasn't he crying?

Her head spun with worry. But everything suddenly muffled instantly and it scared her. Her breathing labored, she saw her vision blur and tunnel until nothing but darkness came over her. The muffled noises disappeared quickly thereafter and everything seemed peaceful and quiet.

Her body didn't hurt anymore. Her head didn't feel light either. It felt peaceful and nice. It felt calm. It felt like sleeping now would be good. And a soothing voice only made it seem that much easier.

" _All is well, child; you have performed your task formidably. Rest and leave if you must. There are now plenty who can carry this gift for us. You deserve your peace. Now...sleep."_

But before she could fall asleep, her sharp hearing returned and caught a single noise.

Cries. Lofty and deafening cries of a newborn. The sound—it's energy—rushed through her body and she couldn't help but inhale sharply at the hit that her heart and lungs took. It was like she'd been drowning and her head had finally broken through the surface. What had been minutes felt like hours underwater.

When she finally opened her eyes, she didn't notice Kouen, Koumei, or Kouha at all. All she wanted was her little boy.

"...where…" she whispered, her throat sore from the hours of labor. "...my baby…"

"Ceara, you're—" Kouen didn't get to finish his sentence. Zhu came right up with his medics to check her. Shockingly to them, she struggled fiercely against them, pleading to see her baby. It wasn't until after their fussing that they obliged and she finally got to hold her little boy. A boy that had that same fiery red hair as his father and big sister.

"...h-hey, you," she cooed weakly with a chuckle when her baby shifted and tried grabbing at the fingers she used to touch his little face. "...welcome to the world, my love…"

Ren Kouyuu came to their world just shy of Kohaku's first birthday. The two were but a month apart in birthdays yet couldn't have been more different with how quiet her little moon was. But little Yuu had also caused other changes with his arrival, one being the three men's strange attitude towards her.

It wasn't until after a few weeks of them acting weird that she finally beat it out of them to tell her what was making them act like that. Kouen was the one that told her the truth one night after their children were blissfully asleep.

"Ceara...for a split moment after Kouyuu was born...you died."

* * *

With things set, the four of them readied themselves for the trip back home. It would be a long night for them, she could tell. This would be an overnight departure to Rakushou but at least that there seemed to be a blessing in disguise. Ceara thanked the heavens that their kids were so young for once, since they collapsed soon after the sun fell over the horizon. It would be much easier to get them through this long journey like that.

Koumei and Alibaba took her children inside as they slept, her little girl still sobbing even in her sleep. Ceara set that aside for a second to go and say her goodbyes to the two that would be staying in Samon Island. She gave Kouha a chaste kiss on the cheek which he reciprocated and gave her a sad smile.

"Take care of him for me. And take care of yourself too."

"I will," Kouha replied with a crooked smile, "You take care of yourselves too, all right?"

She nodded and glanced up at her husband, the man towering her even as he leaned on his cane and on two artificial legs, and gave him a genuine smile. Reaching up, she brushed her hand through his hair before laying it upon his cheek.

"Be good with Kouha. Try to have patience, okay?"

He didn't answer. There wasn't any need to, frankly. Instead he gave her his piece. "Don't act rashly and take better care of yourself. Our only goal is to avoid what happened from happening again."

Ceara nodded. "I will." For once she wasn't lying. To get better as soon as possible, she would have to actually listen to that advice. She would actually have to be careful until this child was born.

"And be sure to come back. All of you."

A sudden presence she knew all too well presented itself when she heard those words. What was more, it spoke.

" _Why put so much faith in something so uncertain?"_

 _It's not._

"We will," she smiled, ignoring that voice that played in her mind. Leaning in as close as her distended stomach would allow, she stood on her toes and gave a chaste kiss to his lips before stepping back. "Be ready to meet your new child when we come back!"

Everything after that was a blur. Because they were stowing away in the ship, Alibaba snuck them through the cargo and told them that by the morning they would be docking at Rakushou's shores. It'd be fast. Kohaku and Yuu would surely be awake by then.

Needless to say that Ceara didn't feel like parting from them. Instead she kept near, soothing them as they slept with her quiet songs. By doing so, she utilized her magic to keep them calm through the whole trip. But using Silver Echoes only made her presence more prominent. And soon, she appeared fully without any prompting. Ceara hated that.

" _How adorable they are when asleep."_

"Leave, Euphemia."

Euphemia, however, was unfazed by her words soaked in threats. Not like she cared, anyway. Ceara cast her gaze aside to where she heard Euphemia and met eye to eye with the spirit or mirage or whatever it was. There wasn't any telling what exactly she was.

All Ceara knew for a fact was that it reminded her of Murmur.

And she hated that. This _thing..._ it wasn't anything like her kind djinn.

Despite seeing her fully in her form, Ceara still couldn't fathom how this could be. She understood why she saw her, not so much the how.

The rukh she often heard around herself, even with the one bracelet she had on, hovered around Euphemia caringly but the young woman she saw in faint appearance never paid them any attention. Like she didn't care for them. And the matter of the fact was that she didn't, not about them or about anybody. That wouldn't change no matter how meek or friendly she appeared.

That was a facade. A hollow soul used as a vessel, a messenger. Something she would eventually become a part of once she, too, died.

And the one thing she would never allow either Kohaku, Yuu, or this child in her to become.

Done with her mind games, Ceara raised her hand at Euphemia's specter and felt the seal on her left shoulder spring forth with life. She rarely used it so vigorously or with such strength. The only times were for protection or to rid herself of this pest. "You're forcing my hand, Euphemia. Leave before I will you away and we both suffer from it."

The ghost tilted her head curiously, clearly perplexed by her demand. _"That is not prudent. You will harm yourself and the progeny in you. Vessels are priceless, so I would not suggest you do that."_

"Then leave. Now," Ceara finally demanded.

" _Very well,"_ Euphemia agreed. _"But I warn you once more, Ceara of Eriu, you mustn't go against our master's orders. She only has the best at heart for this world. You must bestow our gift. A Champion must be born. It is what is best for the world."_

"If she's anything like you, I highly doubt that." Ceara readied what would disperse Euphemia if she didn't leave that instant. As if sensing her threat becoming real, Euphemia lowered her head as a bow before disappearing completely. But she kept her hand aloft, only lowering it once she felt her presence completely gone and heard the rukh around her fly about as normal.

This was getting out of hand. Ever since Kohaku was born it'd started getting worse. Yuu's arrival didn't make it any better, either. But Ceara would be damned if she was going to let that freak or these 'others and their master' dictate how she was to use her powers. The thought of calling the one person that she knew would know what to do came to her but she cut it short as soon as it came.

Rakah didn't answer her call a year ago when this first happened and she and Kouen agreed that he was their only lead on how to approach this. She doubted he would answer her now of all times.

"Sister?"

"I'm here," she whispered not wanting to awake her children. Not like they would, anyway, since she continued humming, easing their minds with her voice and the magic of Silver Echoes.

Koumei came out from the adjacent room with Alibaba behind him. His voice lowered, he nodded at the toddlers. "You should rest as well. You'll need it. It won't be long before we arrive to the eastern shores. It'll be another few hours on carriage back to the capital."

"I will, thanks," she replied with a crooked grin. At seeing the former Balbadd prince, Ceara's mind concocted a question that she hadn't thought about before. "By the way, Alibaba, have you come into contact with Aladdin?"

The boy's enthusiasm from the whole day wavered a bit, perhaps from being reminded that he was still separated from his friend after three long years. "No, regrettably. But surely if I help Kou, he'll notice me. For now, anyway, helping Kougyoku and the Kou Empire is my priority."

"I see. As things stand, though, I am glad to hear that." He gave a sheepish, almost boyish grin at her answer. Ceara had been wrong at thinking the young boy hadn't changed over these past years. Even when she didn't know the unique circumstances of how in the world someone that was supposed to be dead came back, she could tell that those experiences changed him. Or more like opened him up to himself and thus allowed him to share that brilliant part of himself with the world.

At least that was what her gut was telling her.

Enthused about what would become of them once they landed in Rakushou, she patted the chair next to her at Alibaba. The young man took the hint and took the seat while Koumei shook his head but joined them.

"So do tell me, Alibaba. What is it that you plan on doing to help Rakushou and our Empress?"

A brilliance, the same that told her that this boy was unique in his own way, shone like a thousand suns in summer from him as he beamed a grin. Without much more prompting he began explaining the plan that he and the rest of the parliament in Rakushou had concocted. Ceara knew this information would be good for Koumei since he would have to deal with all this as the new 'strategist' of this economic war. But she also benefited from the information.

After all, what was the purpose of returning if not to help.

"That's a splendid plan you've come up with," she complimented with a smile. Alibaba shyly rubbed the back of his head.

"We've stumbled into trouble thinking of how to transport our goods but with Koumei's help, I think we can manage just fine."

"You surely will." Ceara laid a gentle hand on Koumei's shoulder, reassuringly. "Mei's knowledge will undoubtedly help in this."

"You flatter me," he countered as his gaze went askance and he scratched the back of his head, a habit that never really went away over the years.

"Justly so," she guaranteed with a cheeky grin, "En may have his strengths but where smarts were concerned, you were always miles ahead of him. There was a reason he intended to leave you the throne, you know?"

"I suppose so."

His unusual meekness got her to smile before her eyes wandered off to her sleeping cherubs. She hummed softly as her fingers brushed through their hair. "I want to help these endeavors as well."

"You mustn't," Koumei reminded her, "in your condition—"

"Of course it's not going to be now, Mei," she corrected him with a pout. Wanting to talk to the one that would actually take her seriously, she turned to speak to Alibaba. "I still have a couple of months until I give birth. I'll need a few months to recuperate after that, half a year at most. But through that I can still help you and Kougyoku. Not to boast but I've worked with the people before. They might not be fond of me anymore but I learned a lot about them and can teach you how to work with them efficiently."

"That would be a great help," Alibaba agreed with a beaming smile. "But I'll have to agree with Koumei on this one and insist we wait things out. You can help us but only after your condition is taken care of. How does that sound for you?"

She agreed and the plan was set much to Koumei's dismay. He surely feared Kouen's reaction but neither he nor Kouha were here. Ceara could deal better with one mother hen than three. But her work would have to wait a few months.

" _Indeed. Do take care of yourself. That is a precious thing you carry."_

There was no warning this time. Ceara simply activated Silver Echoes without a word, the seal on her shoulder shining brightly even from underneath her clothes as her powers burst out and dissipated all at once. Euphemia's presence disappeared just the same, the surge of rukh actually making her shattering visible as tiny shards of torn up rukh fluttered like broken glass before disappearing.

Alibaba stared dumbfounded and Koumei only flinched from the sudden attack. Ceara simply wiped her nose from the blood that began falling from it as she stared at the place where Euphemia's ghost had been standing.

"Her again?" Koumei asked without any prompting. Ceara only nodded as she tilted her head back to help the nosebleed stop.

"Her?" Alibaba repeated utterly confused.

It took her raising her hand to get Alibaba to give her a moment before she lowered her head to stare at him and answer. "I don't know how to accurately describe it. All I know is that it's not good. What it wants, I won't give to it. _Even_ over my dead body. And it's the reason I've been wanting to speak with Aladdin."

* * *

 _ **Exile: Year Three**_

* * *

As Kohaku grew, it became clear that not only had she inherited her father's looks and deadly glare but also his intelligence and curiosity. The little girl was able to learn things rather quickly. Whatever they taught her, whatever they said, she would catch onto and absorb it.

There was no telling how special she could come to be. Although she already thought of Haku as her bright little sun, they all knew she would achieve great things.

Because of this, it wasn't rare for her imagination to flare. It often did and it was mostly her and Kouha who went along with her plays as she would babble loudly in the open, entertaining her little brother in the process. And because of this, Ceara didn't see anything wrong with what her daughter had said that day after she had barely turned two.

"Mama, who pretty lady?"

"What pretty lady, sweetheart?"

"She!" Kohaku chimed giddily, pointing her finger out. Ceara broke back from her small errands to glance at where her daughter pointed. The chill that ran down her back stopped her in her tracks.

"...you're—"

The woman's specter, or what appeared to be, gave her a smile before her gaze fell down to her children and waved her small hand. Fear struck her even more when Kohaku waved back as did Yuu, forcing his hand to close and open. Ceara rushed to pick them up to run out of the room and bring them to the others. She knew that _she_ was still there; it followed her. But the moment she put her children in their room, she sprinted out without a word. She ran all the way to the shore until her legs and lungs couldn't take her anymore.

Only then did she face the specter. "What do you think you are doing, Euphemia?"

The phantom appeared from thin air and looked just the same as the first time she'd seen her years ago when they were first exiled, before she even knew about Kohaku.

It was a woman, or at least what looked to be a woman. Her small round eyes appeared a gentle aquamarine that gazed at her. Her full lips pursed into a line, aloofness etched on the perfectly round face of hers. She was dressed in odd robes; they were silks that wrapped around her torso and across one shoulder to connect to the belt on her hips where more silks flowed down. Her feet weren't visible, they disappeared into a glow that blurred her after her knees. But what caught her attention most was her hair; it was long to her back and blazing in flames the same aquamarine as her eyes.

It reminded her of Murmur. And her assumptions had proven right the first couple of times she spoke to her. Apparently, Euphemia had been part of Murmur's tribe back in Alma Toran, the Dea Icaunis. The name had sounded familiar to Ceara and for a good reason. Murmur's tribe had situated themselves in a stretch of islands in the middle of the world: islands they dubbed the Isles of Icaunus, and islands she had known as the Eastern Isles. Her mother's and brother's birthland, and her own.

Those with Icaunus blood were connected to her tribe of Dea Icaunis. And as such they were descendents of Euphemia's who turned out to be Murmur's granddaughter.

When Euphemia didn't answer, Ceara decided to ask her why she could see her, a question that she never answered before. Euphemia pursed her lips and averted her gaze before replying. _"My grandfather and our tribe's chief supported me greatly when I decided to join my friends in order to aid Master Uraltugo in creating this new world you live in now. Us seven were the ones that went into the core of Alma Toran to strip it from the gifts Ill Ilah had bestowed upon the world. I was the first bearer of the Silver Echoes of this world."_

"...the first…?"

Euphemia didn't bother explaining that subject further. Instead, she diverted and continued elsewhere. _"We helped craft this world in Alma Toran's image from the outside. And once it was completed, continued to aid to its existence from within it. We are the sources of the magic in this world—the source of Ill Ilah's gift—and you, as our descendents, carry that same task."_

It was the same thing Aladdin said to her. Because she possessed Silver Echoes, she held and could control the source of sound magic, or rukh compatible with that magic, in her body. And it was what was slowly killing her now.

"W-What task are you talking about?" Ceara asked, wanting to get as much vital information as she could.

" _The task to bestow the gift of sound upon this world. The seven of us took from Alma Toran to give to our people, and as our descendents, you must do the same. The gifts demand penance in order to keep the world functioning. For us, the reason sound is still here in the world is because you and those who bore Silver Echoes before you have paid its due penance."_

"Paid...penance…?"

" _You suffer so the world may live."_

 _What?_ They suffer? Her and those that bore it before her… There has been others? _Who—_

"My family—who from my family?" Ceara asked vehemently, holding onto her shoulder were she felt the seal thrum with energy from the rukh that had gathered around her like moths to a fire. "Who's had this before me?"

" _A plethora of people have,"_ Euphemia replied but tilted her head, her eyes becoming somewhat blank as she gave some more thought to it. _"But if what you inquire is whom of those you knew possessed it then it would be those which you call Speirr and Cael of Eriu."_

 _Mother...and Cael?_

Euphemia shook her head languidly, however, and heaved a heavy sigh. _"Alas, neither were capable of fully wielding Silver Echoes. Speirr of Eriu barely even touched the surface of our powers before she perished. As such, Silver Echoes followed the line of inheritance and was bestowed to her firstborn and most compatible. Lamentably and despite the great potential, Cael of Eriu was killed before our powers awakened in him. So it followed the line once more and came to you. I must commend you, Ceara of Eriu. Over the span of this world's creation, you are the first aside from myself who's been capable of wielding Silver Echoes to such exemplary magnitude."_ Her head hung for a bit as another sigh escaped her. Ceara noted something this time; the sigh and look weren't out of pity or sadness, they were out of disappointment.

" _Alas you have suffered greatly and your body cannot withstand the rukh of the world as you are now. We theorized that this would be a possibility. But because only humans are left now in the world to wield our gifts, we must find a way to make this assimilation work."_

"Assimilation. You mean the seal and how it makes the rukh course through my body?"

" _That is but a side effect. You wield Silver Echoes for minimalistic tasks and that's dull compared to the true power beings like us could produce. You were a grand candidate for our gift, Ceara of Eriu. But, as you are now, it is impossible for you to fully become the Champion I once was venerated for being. I say this with a heavy heart but you can no longer succeed me. But not all is lost."_ A smile spread across her lips as she clasped her hands together happily. _"Thanks to you and your valiant efforts now there are more vessels compatible with our gift. Surely one of them will be able to wield Silver Echoes like I once did. So now, Ceara, bestow our gift to them and create the Dea Icaunis Champion this world needs."_

Champion. Bestow. Inheritance. The instant it clicked in her mind, Ceara felt the insurgence of energy that gathered around her. It was the rukh. Her mind held but not completely taken by anger, Ceara could hear the ruckus of the rukh that surrounded her and heard the cacophony of the energy that her emotions were causing. It was so much that sparks of vibrant green flashed across her vision and across the field, creating a field of noise that affected neither her nor Euphemia.

"You want me to give this curse to my own children?"

" _Of course."_ The nonchalance that she spoke with only fed into her anger and caused the field to pulse. A slight crack came to her ears but she ignored it as her fists tightened, leaving her knuckles white. _"They are the most compatible. And as young as they are now, your progeny should be able to wield Silver Echoes with your tutelage swiftly. With your guidance, they can master our powers before they expire. You can cultivate these vessels to be worthy of being Champions of this world."_

"Champions, gifts." She took a step forward and under her feet the ground pulverised as she stood on a sphere of sound. "You talk about this as if it's some kind of extraordinary feat. Like my suffering, the death and suffering of those that wielded this thing, is somehow honorable, even desirable!"

The blank stare that Euphemia gave her told Ceara her answer even before the apparition replied.

" _It_ is _honorable."_ Euphemia spread her arms out to show her their surroundings, as if to show her exactly what they were capable of. _"We wield the powers that god itself created! We succeed the weak ones that perished under the hands of Patientia and safeguard the world from its demise. We stood with her as Champions of Alma Toran, and stand now as guardians of this new world! To die for this cause, is to die for the greater good! Do you not see this?"_

"The greater good to me is my children and the people I care about and love!" she exclaimed back, the barrier extending further even more. "And for me to pass this godforsaken curse to them would be the same as leading them to their death. That I will not allow!"

" _But you must!"_

"I will not!"

"Mama!" Ceara's head snapped at hearing the cries of her daughter. From afar, she saw her little girl running towards her with more people behind her. Before she could run further, though, Kouha dashed up and caught up to her to scoop her into his arms. Kouen and Koumei followed as closely as they could with Koumei holding Yuu as he cried. The three of them stared knowingly at her powers but Ceara also saw the concern in their eyes. The rest of the people simply stared in terror at the sound barrier she had built. What was more, she could see how the vibrations were beginning to escape and pulverize nearby foliage and trees.

It was running out of control.

 _No. I can control. It's mine._

Ceara took a deep breath to calm her anger and felt how the barrier responded in kind by shrinking further and further until it became nothing but a tiny sphere of sound in her palm ready to rupture from the vibrations encapsulated in it.

"I will not bestow this to them."

Euphemia showed no signs of anger. Just like before, she showed no sign of any emotion as her blank, aquamarine eyes stared at her passively. Ceara didn't know if they could see her, but the sound of her voice clearly resonated and came to all of them now that her powers were so concentrated and controlled.

" _What a shame. But they are young. Although the perfect candidate would be a progeny at this age, the transfer can wait a few years until you expire and still be successful. And when that happens, you will have no say in our choice. Silver Echoes will choose its vessel and they shall carry our legacy until a Champion rises once more. This world deserves its guardian. Your selfishness will not hinder our Master's mission to us seven."_

"For all I care, you, yours, and that shit-eating master of yours can disappear," Ceara confessed tired of her nonsense. "I won't give this thing to any of them and I won't die either."

" _You cannot stop us from achieving our Master's mission. Such a feat is a fool's errand alone."_

"I won't be alone." Ceara couldn't help the cheeky grin that came over her lips. Lifting her hand where the sphere of sound was, Ceara minded her control just as the bangle on her wrist—one of the two—broke and fell from it. One limiter was enough. "And I won't be dealing with your shit anymore."

Flicking the sphere her way, it floated to her and exploded in the contained area that Ceara created. The vibrations shredded her body made of sound rukh and made it scatter like broken pieces of glass. Her presence disappeared and Ceara felt a lightness to the air around her. Weak and exhausted, Ceara failed to hear the shouts calling her name when she passed out without a word.

* * *

When things were planned, they needed to be followed. That was why they were called plans.

Alibaba would present them as newly added to his entourage in order to help Kou's revival. That had been the plan. It was a pity that both she and Koumei had to hide their faces behind masks. It mostly scared Yuu seeing his uncle and mother like that but Kohaku managed to convince him of it all being a game like she believed it to be.

"Mama and _Shushu_ Mei are it. We hide. They find us, we lose," she'd explained childishly.

"Yuu no wanna lose," he assured her with a shake of his head.

"Then we hide!"

Ceara blessed the heavens that Kohaku grew so much faster than either of them expected. That would give her some peace at having left them with a couple of maids while they dealt with this. Alibaba assured her it would only take a couple of minutes for her since their main issue would be discussed with Koumei. Ceara didn't find issue with that since she was quickly tiring from standing so much.

Alibaba finished presenting them as the reformed Imperial 'strategist' and 'counselor' as fast as he had promised. Koumei bowed to the parliament and she followed suit, listening to the old men that were crying from seeing Koumei and most likely pitying him for having to hide his identity. They didn't seem to care about her presence. Ceara doubted they remembered her at all. Not that it bothered her.

 _But it's not all of them._ Her eyes and ears did catch the rare sight of a quiet pair that stood off to the side closer to Kougyoku. At rising from her bow, and the instant her stark blue eyes met a pair of mossy green and gray eyes, Ceara almost felt like shouting in joy.

 _Goodness, you two have grown._

Seijin stood tall above the rest of the parliament almost at Ka Koubun's height. She should've expected as much seeing as he was at his peak age at fifteen; he still had much to grow, though. He definitely looked the part of a young man. His golden hair was mostly cut and styled short except for the long stresses that he gathered at his nape as a long tail. He looked in tip-top shape as well with his physique much better than his twelve-year-old self. But that same tenderness and loyalty that she had always seen in his eyes was still present and gazed at her fondly from a distance.

A perky little thing also stood beside him and that almost got her to chuckle in amusement. Despite being his senior, Parisa now stood a whole head shorter than Seijin. Her hair was much shorter than before but was still gathered to the side of her head with a small ponytail that curled into itself. The small wand she remembered her having was gone, now replaced by a wooden staff wrapped in vines that curled out at the top and blossomed with white bell flowers with small shining pearls dangling from inside them. Like those flowers, Parisa had truly grown into a beauty of her own.

Both gave a glance to her alone it seemed while the others were distracted with Koumei. Seijin briefly touched the silver vine ear cuff he wore before bowing respectfully while Parisa bowed, crystal bangles clinking from both her hands.

Her tender albeit silent reunion was cut short when Koumei went straight to the point and asked for the location of the magic research facility. They were about to part and Kougyoku was about to join her when she heard a couple of familiar giggles and tiny footsteps nearby. Before she could even speculate and hope she was wrong, her two cherubs clashed against her body with loud laughter. For once in a long while, Ceara felt flustered at having her children bursting in like that.

"Mama found you!" Kohaku called out giddily.

"Mama it! Mama it!" Yuu shouted with glee like his sister.

What?

 _But...I thought I was already it._

Murmurs began to spread around the room like wildfire on the driest of grass. Luckily, Kougyoku whom they had only just encountered with now like all the others, approached them. As if sensing the qualm they had caused, Kohaku and Yuu clung closer to Ceara while staring up at Kougyoku. Their empress shocked the parliament men by kneeling to meet the children with a small smile.

"Oh my, who do we have here?"

Kohaku shrunk closer to Ceara as did Yuu but surprisingly enough, he spoke over their shyness with a quiet voice. "Yuu."

"Yuu is your name?" she asked to which he nodded meekly. Kougyoku clasped her hands together and smiled sweetly at them. "That's a rather fine name for such a brave young boy like yourself. And is this your sister?" Yuu nodded again, this time more confidently and coming a bit away from Ceara's robes. Kougyoku turned to Kohaku this time with the same smile. "And what would your name be, sweetheart?"

"K-Kohaku." Puffing her chest and cheeks, she stepped away from Ceara while still having a firm grasp of her robes. "Ren Kohaku."

Ceara visibly cringed at that. She'd forgotten that Kohaku had gotten into the habit of saying her complete name after she learned it. Her eyes wandered over to Koumei who simply shrugged his shoulders and shook his head. He was right, it didn't really matter now, anyway. No matter what the people who heard her say her full name would think, it would only be speculations. And with the misinformation they had, Ceara knew they would never guess who sired the two.

"Is that so?" Kougyoku chimed in gleefully. "My name's Ren Kougyoku."

"That's Yuu and Haku!" Yuu called out recognizing their surname as well. "Baba and mama too!"

"Isn't that splendid," she cooed before reaching out her hands. "Say, Kohaku-chan, Yuu-kun, would you like to go explore my home with me? I'm sure you'll find lots of fun things to do here."

The geezers from parliament began to oppose about this but her children didn't seem bothered by the whispers. Instead, they seemed encouraged. Kohaku reached out to Kougyoku without hesitation but before Yuu even touched her outstretched hand, he looked up at Ceara with pleading eyes. "Yuu go, mama?"

Ceara looked away for a second knowing that if she stared too long at that face she would eventually cave. There was a damn good reason Kouen took over disciplining them most of the time. She caved way too easily. Gazing at Kougyoku wasn't any different. Even after three years, that puppy look was still there. What was worse...it worked, too.

"Don't worry," Kougyoku assured her. "You may accompany us as well, Miss Counselor. I'm sure you'll find our palace a pleasant place and our staff truly a sight for sore eyes."

Oh, Kougyoku worked on her subtlety over the past three years. Ceara could easily tell that the sentences were carefully crafted for a reason. _She wants me to join them for something._ And Ceara really wanted to know what.

"That's a good idea," Alibaba chimed in. "Miss Counselor isn't in the best shape to be walking around too much, though. Perhaps a small walk and then rest would be good. Don't you think, Kougyoku?"

Their empress nodded with a smile. "Certainly sounds like a fine idea to me. Ka Koubun and the rest will guide you and our Lord Strategist to the research facility while Miss Counselor and I acquaint ourselves. Is that alright with you, Miss Counselor?"

"Certainly, your majesty," Ceara replied with a smile and with a small bow. Kohaku and Yuu both clapped and cheered, jumping up and down before taking one of Kougyoku's hands before urging her to take her to see her home. Each group left to their respective locations within the first few minutes. Not quite alone though. Aside from Seijin and Parisa, Kougyoku had an entourage of maids that followed her around.

Everywhere. Literally.

She supposed that it was lucky that in her state there wasn't much energy in her to walk around Rakushou's palace anymore. This prompted her and Kougyoku to take refuge in one of the many parlors scattered around the palace. Once situated and once her children were gone to explore the large room, Kougyoku quickly called out for her maids to retrieve some afternoon refreshments. The maids left quickly at their order with her two old friends following behind. Kougyoku, however, stopped them briefly as she called out to them.

"Parisa, Seijin—" Ceara watched tentatively as both turned to face their empress with a low bow.

"Yes, your majesty," Seijin replied solemnly for the two of them.

"Do summon the captains. Tell them that I request their presence immediately, would you?" Captains? Of her defense corp? What for?

Seijin, however, didn't seem disturbed. In fact, a bright grin came to him as he and Parisa raised from their positions. When he rose, there was a gleam in his eyes that he directed at her before replying. "Of course, your majesty."

"We shall convey your message to them," Parisa replied with a smirk of her own.

Before they left through the doors, they smiled and bowed again but this time they didn't mean it to Kougyoku. No, for this one, they faced her alone and their expressions changed completely, showing off the happiness with smiles that spread from ear to ear as they raised once more.

"Welcome back, Master," Seijin called out with nod and the broadest smile she'd ever seen as he tapped his Household Vessel.

"There's much to talk about but that can wait for later," Parisa assured her with a wink. She waved her hand about and snickered, "We must heed our empress' orders, after all. I trust you understand, Miss of Eriu. But we'll surely have time later."

"We will see to it that there's time," Seijin promised her . "For now, excuse us."

Ceara couldn't keep the smile that came to her lips. They had changed but hadn't really. She was glad about that. Her small bubble burst, though, as within seconds after the door had closed Ceara had to cover her ears from the squeal that left Kougyoku. Her magenta eyes shining brighter than she'd ever seen them, the young woman lunged from her seat to hug Ceara with tears prickling her eyes.

"A-Anegimi! How I've missed you so!"

"I've missed you too, Kougyoku," Ceara commented, hugging the young empress tightly against her. When Kougyoku's hand brushed against her belly accidentally, the girl jumped back before an even wider smile appeared on her lips.

"And look at you," she called out gleefully before her eyes turned out to the two kids that were climbing onto chairs again and again, testing their cushiness. "Look at them! You have kids!"

" _We_ have kids," she corrected as her hand came up to stroke her distended stomach. "Your brother certainly proved himself to be a family man."

"Big brother Kouen, I'm sure." Ceara couldn't help scrunching her nose before nodding to assure Kougyoku of her suspicion. That caused another squeal to escape her. This one wasn't high enough to hurt her hearing, thankfully. "I can't believe it! Oh, I wished I would've been there. I wish I could congratulate him too. They're adorable little things!" Kougyoku's breathed hitched as she winded herself mute before a serious look came over her. "Do they have godparents yet?"

 _What is it with these siblings and wanting my children?_ Ceara couldn't help but chuckle at that commonality between them. Seemed only Koumei was the odd one out of the bunch.

"They do actually. We convinced Koumei into taking Kohaku. He didn't seem as confident about it as we were when we decided on it. Yuu also has a godfather, though not one he sees often." Ceara looked over at her children who were now jumping up and down on the chairs. Quickly, she chastised them, telling them not to and the two looked at her then each other before chiming a 'yes' and climbing down the chairs to run around again.

"And this little one?" she asked reaching out but holding herself back. Ceara smiled and took Kougyoku's hand to bring it against her stomach. Her cheeks dusted pink at feeling it, suddenly chuckling when it moved inside her. "Quite the active one, I see."

"Which is why Kouha already took the role of godfather without even knowing them." Ceara sighed remembering the whole debacle that prompted Kouha to fight for his claim on their third child. "I guess he expected that Koumei would take the firstborn and he would follow if we decided to have more. Which is why he wasn't really fond of us when En and I decided that Yuu wasn't going to be his godson. So, we kind of promised him that the next one would be all his."

"Yuu's not Kouha's godchild?"

"No," Ceara confessed, "That falls upon the younger brother of the man whom Yuu was named after."

Kougyoku had to think about it for a second before a gentle smile came to her lips. Her sight went over to the young boy in question before that smile broadened. "Hakuryuu must be happy."

"He was." So happy in fact that he cried a bit when they first told him. He, Aladdin, and Morgiana visited them once before they disappeared almost a year ago. That had been a few months after Yuu's birth. And when they told him their son's name, he only had one thing to say.

" _Ren Kouyuu; a fine name, indeed. I will gladly take that responsibility if you will have it of me. I'm sure…he will grow to make his namesake proud."_

"I only wish he could see him more often to tell him stories about his uncles," Ceara admitted with a defeated sigh. There were a lot of things that she wanted to tell them herself but knew that now wasn't the time. They wouldn't understand.

Kougyoku reached out and cradled her hand with hers. "Surely the day will come when that's possible, anegimi."

"You think so?"

"I believe so, yes."

Tears sprung from her eyes and she hated it, laughing them away instead. How she abhorred how much more emotional she got when pregnant. Certainly made her cry much more than she ought to. The maids returned swiftly with the refreshments promised. Ceara appreciated the drink since she was parched; Haku and Yuu were gaudy over the succulent fruits that were brought. The scene itself made the two women chuckle as they continued talking.

Everything stopped though when Ceara heard footsteps approaching the door. Quieting for a second, she let the knocks on the door rumble through the room before Kougyoku called out for them to enter.

The person that entered wasn't human. Not anymore at least. And neither was the other that sat on their broad shoulder. Despite that, Ceara recognized them instantly. She stood up abruptly, dropping the cup she'd been holding, and ran up to them before hugging the giant of a man that now stood before her.

This time she didn't hate the tears. She embraced them tightly because of the happiness she felt in her.

A couple of firm clawed-hands gripped her shoulder gently and brought her at arm's length. A good head or two over her, Sousei smiled warmly. His dark ruby hair was still long and now rested over his right shoulder in a long, thick braid that ended near his knees. Horns protruded from his head and were swept back, the right one pierced at the tip by the looks of it with a short chain dangling a small gold coin with a crest on it: their family's. His attire was different from when he fully saw him assimilate before. He wore loose trousers and an even looser robe. It seemed to only be there for modesty's sake since it was wide open and barely hanging by his shoulders, leaving his marked chest and abdomen in plain view.

Sousei smiled at her, that boyish grin of his having all the confidence and charisma she always saw in him. "Welcome home, Ceara-nee."

"Oh, me too! Me too!" a slightly higher pitched voice called giddily as the small creature climbed down from his shoulder to perch on his arm like a monkey with her sharp claws.

Large ears perked once, the left one pierced at the tip with a golden hoop and a gold coin emblazoned with the same crest as Sousei's. Her dark chocolate mane poofed out with the tips of her mane flaring to gold as she moved and the light began to hit it just right. Her wolfish nose twitched for a second before she grinned wide, her large incisors peaking out from her lower lip. Her fluffy tailed swept back and forth, the tip gleaming gold as well before she jumped from Sousei's arm and onto Ceara's.

"Welcome back, Ceara-nee!" she squealed, hugging the life out of Ceara.

"Too—tight," she wheezed but held her just as tightly.

"Knock it off, Sui." Said little thing giggled and lessened her grip before pulling back to grin at Ceara.

Ceara only smiled, the tears coming down her cheeks as well before she buried her face against Suisei's mane. "I missed you guys."

"We missed you too," Suisei mumbled and hugged her again. Reaching out to him, Ceara chuckled at seeing Sousei bending down to reciprocate the embrace he readily came to.

 _Gods, I missed this. I missed them._

"I love you, Sousei, Suisei. I love you so much."

" _ **We love you too, Ceachi."**_

"Mama, no!"

Yuu's shriek caught all of them off guard and made both her and Sousei flinch at the high pitch of his voice. Parting from their heartfelt reunion, Ceara wiped her eyes before gazing down at her son who, for the first time ever, had a glare that resembled his father's way too much.

"What's wrong, Yuu?" she asked with a chuckle.

"No, mama. They scary!" he shouted.

"Yeah!" Kohaku shouted as well but safely from Kougyoku's side. "Get away, mama!"

"Yuu care mama. Baba said!"

It took a moment for Ceara to decipher her two-year-old's babble. He was the brave little one that took their father's words way too seriously sometimes. A chuckle came to her at the misunderstanding before she gave Suisei back to Sousei before she bent down to pick Yuu up and motioning for Kougyoku to bring Kohaku with her.

"They're not monsters, honey," she assured him and Kohaku with a glance and pat on the head. "They're mama's family."

"Mama's?" Kohaku asked confused as she stared up at Sousei warily.

"Yes. They're mama's little brother and little sister. Just like how Yuu's your little brother, Haku, and how Haku's your big sister, Yuu."

"No," Yuu pouted. Suisei snickered and climbed down Sousei's arm again to get at Ceara's height. The little fluff stuck out her tail and brushed Yuu's face playfully with it. Her son didn't seem to appreciate it and swatted her tail away.

Suisei visibly deflated with a defeated grin. "Guess not."

"They're...yours?" Sousei asked. He bent down to look at Kohaku—still with a whole head over—as Suisei climbed up to sit on his head. Kohaku shrieked before sticking her tongue out and quickly hiding behind Kougyoku's robes.

"Mine and—" Ceara pursed her lips to quiet herself from saying something unnecessary. Kougyoku however didn't seem fazed. Far from it. She actually nodded as if telling her that it was fine to say it. So she did.

"...and Kouen's."

There was silence. For like a second. All hell broke out after that when the two shrieked out in disbelief. It took her a while to explain that yes, the ex-first prince was not dead; yes, she and him married during their exile in Samon Island; and yes, he was the father of their niece and nephew and soon-to-be-born third child.

"Who would've thought?" Sousei said with a chuckle as he sat on the floor. Due to his height, he apparently hated sitting on chairs now. Instead he took the floor as his seat. Suisei, on the other hand, simply rolled around on the floor, tucking her tail and limbs into herself to form a little ball of fur that could roll about the room. The kids, after having lost their fear of her and despite still being frightened of Sousei, clamored about the room following a ball of fur that went rather fast in her opinion.

"Well, _I_ saw it coming it a mile away," Kougyoku replied pompously. Her eyes narrowed mischievously while the grin on her lips didn't disappear. "Just like I saw you and Parisa-san getting together as well."

"Parisa?" Ceara repeated curious. Turning to face her little brother, she caught him just as he stopped trying to shush Kougyoku behind her back. His cheeks dusted a dark crimson as he averted his gaze, something that was highly noticeable due to his much fairer skin tone in his assimilated form now. "Care to elaborate for me?"

"Well...you see—" He cleared his throat and took a more serious expression but it all was for naught since the effect was greatly diminished due to his still tainted cheeks. "It happened over time, really. Risa stayed in Kou even through the hardships it went through to help Seijin with his assignments. And since Kougyoku—I mean, her majesty pardoned us Household Members with the International Alliance's permission, Sui and I have worked as the corps captains. And because of the work that Seijin and Risa were doing on your behalf, we got to spend a lot of time together. That's how we spent these past three years. And well…" His sheepish nature returned as he began to mumble.

Although Ceara heard him loud and clear, she played along if only to embarrass him further. "Huh, I didn't hear you, Sou. You and Parisa are what?"

This time, though, a furry head perked out from its ball as Suisei's ears perked up in enthusiasm. "Souchi and Risa-chan are gonna get married soon!"

"Suisei!"

"What? Are you not?"

Sousei didn't have the heart to deny it. What his mumbled 'yeah' barely told her was clearly shown by his flushed face getting redder and redder. Soon both began to quarrel and bicker like she remembered. Ceara couldn't help but laugh wholeheartedly at their antics. No matter how much they grew, they never changed.

 _None of them changed. Not Sou, not Sui, not..._

At the somber reminder, Ceara's mood fell and she got the sudden urge to meet with her again. That just made her feel worse. This guilt she felt—unfounded as her mind told her it was—wouldn't go away, and Ceara knew it wouldn't ever leave if she didn't face this last ghost for herself.

Sad to break their happy reunion, Ceara raised her voice when she spoke to them. "Sousei, Suisei, I would understand if you don't want to but...could you take me to where she is…? Please…"

It took the twins a minute to understand what she asked of them and just as she had a expected a somberness came over them like a dark cloud. She hated to do this to them but Ceara had to put these mixed feelings she's carried for years to rest now. And the sooner she did, the better it would be. As if understanding this, Sousei stood up and Suisei returned to her post at his shoulder. Her little clawed hands soothingly stroke Sousei's head but Sousei didn't seem to need it after a deep breath.

He gave Ceara a grim smile and nodded. "We'll take you to her."

* * *

 _ **Exile: Year Three**_

* * *

Ceara couldn't cry. There wasn't an ounce in her that felt any remorse or sadness at the words that the little, smuggled letter told.

But she couldn't deny that there was something wrong.

"What is it?"

Kouen's voice didn't reach her. Not at first. He had to touch her shoulder to break her out of her daze. When she finally noticed him, she blinked a couple of times before feigning a smile.

"A letter from Seijin. Something happened in the palace. Nothing important, really. Just that someone passed away."

 _Not someone! Her! She—_

But she quieted the voice in her that shouted with a loud voice. She had to. There shouldn't be remorse or sadness. Not after all the things that she did to her. Not after all the pain and suffering. She was so concentrated on convincing herself of that notion that she failed to see Kouen reading the letter over her shoulder. It wasn't until Ceara felt his arms surround her from behind that she shook a bit taken aback by the gesture.

"Whatever you are feeling is normal. Don't hold it back."

"I'm not holding back," she admitted and forcefully undid his hold on her. Crumpling the piece of parchment in her hands, she ran for the door only muttering a quick 'I'll be back' before running out. He wouldn't follow. He knew better than to do that.

So she had the chance to run to the eastern shores. Kohaku and Yuu were asleep; even if they woke up, Kouha and Koumei were there to help En. She could afford a few minutes away. Even at the beach she didn't stop and instead kept going into the waves as her hands crumpled the paper up into a ball. Once far enough, she yelled out at the same time she threw the letter out with all her might into the ocean. The ball hit the water soundlessly and disappeared just the same. Out of breath, Ceara took a moment to compose herself and what she felt.

Frustration. Anger. Annoyance. That was it.

Not sadness. Not loneliness. Not remorse.

She deserved to die, a part of her told her. After all that she did to you, she deserved to die.

 _Did she…?_

But the louder voice of her torment won the battle and didn't allow her to feel those things. It was easier to hate. So much easier to be angry and know that she deserved it.

"...you were a monster…" she whispered into the air, hoping it would carry her emotions away. Hoping to clear this sudden feeling that she couldn't begin to describe but wanted nothing of. "...you brought this...upon yourself…"

And after the night faded away into dawn of her convincing herself of that, she returned home. Kouha and Koumei asked questions; she didn't answer with anything specific, only with quiet 'I'm alrights.' Kouen knew better than to ask, so he didn't. She skipped breakfast but before her children even noticed something was wrong, Ceara came back to her usual self.

It was like the night before and the news it brought hadn't happened. And that's what she wanted to think. So she did.

* * *

 ** _"Reizei Masami"_**

Her name was the only thing engraved upon the gravestone. Ceara was somewhat surprised that they had been allowed to bury her here after the fact but she supposed that simple favor from Sousei and Suisei was enough to have Kougyoku agree.

As dusk was starting to end, the sun's rays began to touch the stone less and less, making the name less visible to her eyes. But her mind didn't forget what she had learned but a year ago from Seijin's letter.

An emptiness carved itself on her inside the more she stared at it. For some reason, that same emptiness made her ask the most imprudent of questions.

"Seijin...never mentioned how it happened," she whispered to Sousei and Suisei as they stood a few steps behind her and to the side. "How did she die?"

Sousei wanted to speak by the sound of it but in the end the words seemed to lodge in his throat. It was Suisei who replied to her query.

"Sami-nee...drank one of her poisons." Ceara heard her swallow and clear her throat before continuing. "Risa-chan said that it was water hemlock. That she passed out and most likely didn't feel any pain at all."

"Did you...find out why…?"

Suisei shook her head with a solemn definity. "There wasn't any note in the room where they found her. Neither did we notice anything wrong. At least...I know I didn't."

"I didn't either…" Sousei whispered coming closer and laying the small flowers he and Suisei had picked to leave for her. "She must have been in pain somehow for her to choose death rather than face whatever it was. But I won't…" He took a deep breath and knelt before the grave. "I won't judge her. There wouldn't be a point in doing that. We all had our demons. Perhaps hers were just too big for her to handle."

"And she never talked to any of you about it?" Ceara asked.

Her little sister climbed down from Sousei's shoulder and went to the grave to place the small crown of flowers she had made on top. She heaved a sigh and wiped her arm across her face before shaking her head. "We...weren't on good speaking terms for a while. Even after we did start talking, it wasn't the same. I guess she never really saw us the same after we chose you during the civil war. The funny thing was that after we were released, she never spoke one bad word against you. Granted she never spoke about you at all but when you were brought up in passing by us or by Seijin or Parisa, she would remain quiet."

"There was this look that came over her, though," Sousei pensively said as his brow furrowed. "I never understood what that was about."

Ceara hummed understanding. There were no more questions left for her to ask after that. None that they had any answers to anyway. She stared at the gravestone that her siblings mourn at silently and tried feeling what they did.

But there was nothing.

Not even the anger, the frustration, or the annoyance.

Looking at the gravestone of Kohaku's eldest sister only brought emptiness to Ceara. Emptiness and disillusionment for feeling said emptiness. She honestly thought that if she ever did get to see this exact scene before her that everything she felt when she first read that letter would be there just the same. She's been wrong though, and she couldn't understand why.

A few minutes later, dusk ended and the sun's absence gave way to the darkness of the night. Ceara watched Sousei and Suisei as they rose from their mourning state and turned to her.

"Let's go back inside," Sousei told her somberly and quietly.

"Yeah," Suisei agreed with a small yet just as sad smile. "Those littles one are surely asking for you right about now. We should take them away from Risa-chan and Jin-chan before they drive them crazy."

Ceara nodded and waited until they walked forward to lead the way before she started walking. Her steps were slow though, her footsteps feeling mightily heavier than before. The night brought with it quiet, something that was absurdly overrated for her. Everything was always making noise. Not one moment was filled with silence. There was always something, and if not, there was always the rukh that flocked to her like a beacon.

But tonight, they remained silent. At realizing that, Ceara stopped and hung her head in thought.

 _Why..._

Why now when all she wanted—all she wished for—was noise? Why when the noise helped her forget?

 _Why when it distracts me...from the truth of how this makes me feel._

It wasn't just emptiness. There was remorse, there was sadness, there was sorrow. But they weren't the type that she could muster and express. Not now, at least. Any tears she had for Masami had been spent over the years of hatred, anger, and pain she'd dealt. Even recognizing the truth of what she tried hiding from herself couldn't get her to cry for her.

And so all remained silent.

Until it didn't.

" _Masami one-sama!"_

The cheerful voice and laughter that burst out of nowhere and echoed like a beautiful note made Ceara snap back into reality. Turning to where the voice traveled, she looked back at the gravestone only to see the noise bouncing around the rukh that gathered there. Because of her, the sheer amount of rukh was astounding and the sounds of it caused enough reverberations to make a mirage only she could see.

A faint outline of a small girl—barely of age nine—ran towards the gravestones giggling all the way. A sound that was all too familiar to her. The little outline of green jumped into the arms of another, their outline appearing as the vibrations resonated with the rukh around the place. There was no mistaking Masami in her beauty. She caught Kohaku in her arms and twirled about laughing alongside her sister.

When they finally stopped, Kohaku drew her head against her shoulder with a smile on her face. Masami cradled the girl in her arms tenderly but her expression changed when her eyes landed on Ceara. Astounded that she could see her, Ceara couldn't move or say a word.

There wasn't a need.

Masami only smiled tenderly at her as she cradled Kohaku closer and as two other faint silhouette's garnered the two girls in their arms. There wasn't any disdain or ill intent. For once, Ceara saw the smile for what it had once been.

Tender. Compassionate. Loving.

Ceara could do nothing but return the gesture and bow to them like she had done long ago when she had been a child. This time, however, it wasn't as a servant. It wasn't for forgiveness either.

It was simply her resolve to see them off. Her last farewell.

At lifting her head, she only saw Masami lower her head slightly as if nodding before the rukh dispersed and their images faded, the laughter ebbing with them.

"Ceara-nee?" Ceara turned at Suisei's call. Both her siblings looked at her from a few feet away as if just having noticed she'd stopped following behind them.

Sousei furrowed his brow before speaking. "Is everything all right?"

"Yes," she replied as she caught up to them, "everything is fine."

She left that gravestone with no remorse or tears. Only peace of mind and a smile.

* * *

The Kou Trading Company, with Alibaba's and Koumei's help, would certainly prosper. And now that they had teleportation magic to assist in deliveries, all that was needed were outlets from which produce and people could travel. And as such, Alibaba was chosen to represent their newly formed company for that. By the end of that week, he left Rakushou with a grin on his face for what wonders of this world awaited him after three years.

Koumei remained at work with Kougyoku, Ka Koubun, and the rest of the parliament working on things from the capital. She, sadly, couldn't work for much with only a few months left before she gave birth. Although she held the title of Imperial Counselor, she hadn't done much of any advising to anybody mostly because none of them allowed her to work in her condition. So until she recovered, she was relegated to being babysat by her siblings, Parisa, or Seijin. The latter two took the position today.

Parisa took over entertaining her children with her magic while Seijin worked on the sidelines. From the appearance of things, Seijin had become one of the members of Kougyoku's parliament, much to her surprise. Three years ago this wouldn't have been possible with him being but a servant. Now, thanks to Kougyoku's regime and her kindness to allow hard work to overcome status, Seijin garnered a position that rivaled the importance of Alibaba's as prime minister. Ceara was sure that if it weren't for Ka Koubun and his expertise in the subject, Seijin would have taken that role even before Alibaba came to Kou. All that at such young age of fifteen.

 _I can only imagine what he'll be capable of in the future._

There truly wasn't much to advise the young man in where his work was considered. Truly he had things under control. It wasn't until he asked for her advice personally that she found it odd. When she asked about what, Seijin gave her a knowing smirk before passing the parchment to her.

"Master," Seijin called, relishing in being able to say that after three long years, "I believe this will be something you will want to involve yourself with."

Curious, Ceara took the parchments and skimmed them through. Only when she noticed what they were did her eyes widen.

 _The orphan houses?_

"But I thought these would have disbanded after Sinbad imposed his laws." They allowed people to travel freely between countries after all. And she surely knew of other places in better countries where these people could live.

"The one in Balbadd and Rakushou did. Not the one in Shika."

"It didn't?"

"Somehow. Despite being part of the Kou Empire, Shika was more capable to acclimate to the commerce war that Empress Kougyoku spoke of. It was mostly due because of their location."

Location. The southeastern shores. "Fisheries."

Seijin nodded. "Not only that but after being released, Sousei-dono actually worked separately from his post as captain of the defense corp in order to assimilate Shika and the Eastern Isles to make that market flourish for them. Because of their location, certain species are rare and exotic to them, sort of how the Southern Creatures were for Sindria, and that made it possible for them to stay afloat. Because of this, the houses weren't evacuated. It, in fact, still stands and I hold reigns of it as its supervisor."

"That's amazing, Jin. You did a wonderful job."

"Hardly," he said with a frown. "I couldn't stop the ones in Balbadd and Rakushou from falling. However, with this resurgence of the empire, we might be able to open them back again."

Ceara got thoroughly informed after that about the leniency services like the orphan houses she had established years ago now had in the new world. The International Alliance couldn't really be hard on them since they provided necessary services even in times of peace like these. Peace didn't mean tragedies wouldn't still befall. Children and women were still left without places to call homes. And since Seijin had placed them under his name which wouldn't connect him to the Kou Empire, he was allowed to manage them without hindrance.

"So once we gather necessary funds, more can be opened," she surmised.

"Exactly." Seijin finished his piece then but still seemed fidgety to her for some reason. It was after a while of uncomfortableness that she finally bullied it out of him. "I-It's nothing bad. Actually, it's pretty good."

"Then tell me," she insisted.

Seijin nodded and with a smile took a journal that she had noticed he always carried with him now. Grabbing it when he offered it, Ceara leafed through and saw columns upon columns of names, dates, and positions.

 _This is…_

"The memoirs…" she whispered as every single name settled into her mind. "But I thought...nobody wanted to be apart of that after everything was found out. Why—how?"

"They didn't," he assured her with a scoff. "But after _this_ came out _—"_ he placed another scroll upon her lap, this one seemingly made amass "—there was a gradual change of heart until it all started up again."

Ceara opened it and was astonished with only the excerpt that started the whole thing.

" _ **This is our truth, one that we found and inferred on our own. We serve no lord, we serve no master. We have made our own decision. And with this, it is our hope that you can make yours as well. A cognizant one.**_

 _ **We—Sousei and Suisei Reizei—gives you ours."**_

It was a memoir of their own. A published one. One that garnered all the things that they could about their family. It was completely transparent. It talked about their parent's gifts and problems—their father's alcoholism and their mother's raging tendencies. It talked about Masami. It talked about Kohaku. It talked about the fire at the estate.

But mostly, it talked about her and Masami. More specifically, the truths and lies that each had said to the world. Most of it, Ceara had known for a long time—her involvement in Kohaku's death, her impersonation, her conquering of Murmur—but there were also things that she had no idea of. The one thing that shocked her the most was learning that Cael and Masami had actually been involved way before Masami was engaged to Hakuyuu. And there wasn't much room for doubt, either, because the twins had made sure that every statement they made was supported by evidence. Actual evidence that they had found and scavenged over the three years.

"When was this published?" she asked quietly.

"About nine months ago," Seijin told her. "After three, the letters started coming back. By the end of the year, Parisa and I were flooded with them. Plenty were from those that we had transcribed and returned three years ago, like you told me to, but many new ones appeared as well."

 _Incredible._

Ceara couldn't believe that this—Sousei and Suisei's mere act of truthfulness—had convinced the people of one thing or another. Perhaps they still didn't view her in the best light, but this at least told her that they believed them, and ultimately her, to the point that they were willing to place their trust back in the memoirs she had created.

They wanted their stories told. And they wanted her to be the one to tell them.

"A good amount of letters have already been transcribed." Seijin rubbed the back of his neck nervously but smiling sheepishly all the same. "There's still a lot more work to be done before it's complete. Certainly with your help, though, I'm sure it can be done."

There was no helping the surge of happiness that overcame her at hearing this. So much had happened and yet hope still found its way to them. Things could still work out. All they needed was to work hard for this. Work and believe it's possible.

 _Because it is._ _And we can make it happen._

"Then sign me up, Jin," Ceara called out enthusiastically, "I may not have as much free time as I used to but I will do my best to make this memoirs a reality. Their stories have to be told."

Seijin nodded with pride in the smile that he showed her. "And we'll be the ones to tell the world what they've entrusted to us. It may be three years late but we can do this, Master."

"Yes, we can."

* * *

It amazed her how easy it was to get used to the palace again. What was more, Kohaku and Yuu found it rather enjoyable with so many new people and places to meet and explore. Many times, especially at night, they would cry inconsolably wanting their father. All Ceara could do was be there and ask Koumei to help give them comfort. Her relationships with her former friends and siblings also grew as the weeks went by.

Seijin proved to be a great young man that helped greatly for Kou's cause. Parisa did as well, granting much more comfort to any magician in Kou that would have otherwise left the country. Sousei and Suisei had changed over the years but in the best of ways. Sousei flourished into a man that had a natural talent to lead, especially when he started working to help supervise the food production. What he had feared all his life doing had turned out to be one of his best abilities. Despite still having a childish nature, Suisei grew to naturally take care of others and encourage them on. This time she truly became the older twin sister she was born as.

It was with their help that she managed to cope without Kouen and Kouha. It was because of them that Kohaku and Yuu could endure their separation from all they knew and be able to smile right now.

Within a month, Alibaba was back with good news. All the countries had given positive responses to opening teleportation magic circles in their territories in order to move along trade. And although Parthevia had yet to agree to anything, Alibaba mentioned that things had seemed to have gone smoothly.

But things weren't always what they appeared. She couldn't keep her gut from telling her that something wasn't right after Alibaba's cheerful return. Apparently, Koumei shared her sentiment.

"It just seems...too easy," he had said but didn't explain anything further. There wasn't really any need to because Ceara felt that those words explained things just right. By the end of that month, however, the tensions from not having Parthevia's answers finally ruptured when a single answer came to them.

They had refused. And although Ka Koubun had a point with how the other countries had already accepted, Ceara doubted that Parthevia would be an isolated case. And her fears turned out to be right when Alibaba tried contacting the rest of their collaborators.

Sasan, Artemyra, Magnostadt, Heliohapt, even Balbadd and Reim; all of them had refused to allow a Kou Trading Company outlet. All because of a rumor about Kou rearming itself. Everybody was completely devastated, including her. Alibaba took it a step further and went to Parthevia the minute he could in order to assuage this problem.

He had to or else everything they had done till now would be for nothing. But through his absence, Ceara couldn't help think that all this seemed a bit too planned. It felt like they set the pieces down accordingly to their plans but someone else had dictated where said pieces fell and were thusly capable of dismantling them with one fell swoop.

"...it feels too set up to be a mere coincidence…"

"Indeed it does."

Ceara looked up at Koumei as he hid his face behind his fan. He'd spoken quietly for nobody else to hear but knew that she would be able to hear even the quietest of whispers. "You have your suspicions?"

"As I'm sure you do as well. And I'm also sure our conclusion is one and the same."

Sinbad. She didn't voice it, however. It didn't matter, anyway, who spread the rumor. What mattered now was dealing with the outcomes. They had two options, either dispel the rumor from its source or change their plan.

 _Change Koumei's plan…_

The realization of what that implicated came to her suddenly, and she didn't wait to ascertain her suspicion. "You've got something else, don't you?" she whispered to him. "Some kind of contingency."

Koumei gave a subtle nod. "However, I wish to know what Sinbad has to say about this. It could very well verify or disprove our conjectures and also prove useful for the future to know how to deal with this man."

Ceara saw that decision for what it was, cruel but necessary.

Alibaba came back that same day with the news that he couldn't stop the rumors. At that, everybody was downtrodden. The air in the place literally changed and became heavy and Ceara felt it drown her. It felt horrible.

"I think that's your cue, Mei."

He didn't answer. He simply raised his hand. "You needn't worry, Minister Alibaba. I have a backup means of transport in place." And Ceara had to admit that his idea wasn't bad at all. Transport as far as Kou's boundaries and ship normally from there, keeping the produce chill and viable with the tiagram talismans.

But even that sounded like a back-out solution. Frankly, it was. Which made Alibaba's point even more valid. They had to regain people's trust in Kou, practically rebuild it from the ground up. If that could be done, then their original plan could easily work again. But they would have to be transparent with their neighboring countries. They would have to show just what kind of nation Kou was aiming to become in this new world.

Kougyoku agreed, although, she also admitted that she had no clear vision of what she wanted her country to become. It was hard to hear but she admitted to having only been following behind her brothers' footsteps.

 _She's been following a beaten path._

And for this country she loved, and as its empress, that shouldn't be the case. She was following a path literally beaten into shape, one Ceara helped in making. But a path like that would never work in this new world. As scary as it was, Kougyoku had to traverse past that and create a new way.

For her and for her people.

"No, you're right, your majesty." Ceara watched Mei intently at hearing his words and noticing the tenderness in them. "All those who aspired to unify the world through military might...have perished. Hereafter, please envision your own dream and share it with everyone. You can handle it."

"Lord brother…"

Ceara could only smile warmly at the tenderness of the scene. Kougyoku had everybody's support, including her brothers. Including hers.

"There's no need to follow their beaten path," Ceara said to the crying girl as she stood up to get to her. Gently with her sleeve, she wiped the young woman's face from her tears before cradling her face in her hands and smiling. "You have what it takes to go beyond what they did. You are and have always been capable of accomplishing great feats. You only need to believe in yourself more, and know that from that strength you show we will make the choice to believe in you too. Traverse on with courage, your majesty, and we shall follow."

"A-Anegimi…"

Kougyoku couldn't help but wrap her arms around her and embrace her tightly. Ceara did the same and stroke her head soothingly. She needed encouragement aside from Alibaba's. She needed it from her people. And she had it.

Pop.

Ceara doubted that it was audible to anybody but her. It certainly was tangible to her, especially because she felt the warm liquid trickling down her legs much too fast.

"...oh boy," she mumbled, stepping away from Kougyoku to look down.

The young empress followed her line of sight and shrieked when she saw the water on the floor. "Anegimi! You're—"

"D-Don't worry, Kougyoku," Ceara assured her, despite finding her reaction funny, and went about gathering the edges of her robes to ascertain herself that, yes, her water had indeed broken. "It's just time for this little cherub to join us, is all."

Koumei was the first to run up to them. "Already?"

"Apparently so," Ceara mumbled and took his arm to support herself at the small surge of pain that ran through her body. "Oh, yeah. It's happening."

Kougyoku acted like a true trooper then. Ordering Ka Koubun to work on without them with Koumei's alternate transportation plan, she hurriedly ordered Seijin to ready the sickroom and staff for a delivery. Parisa stayed with them to help get Ceara there as quick as possible, and it helped them get there quite fast indeed. Mei and her helped her lay down on the bed the healers had prepared and a much too familiar process began after that.

Despite her state, Ceara found Alibaba's nervousness adorably funny and chuckled between the bouts of pain that were coming faster than she thought they would. This one definitely was coming in a hurry and the medics were still getting ready.

"H-Hurry, people," she groaned as a huge wave of pain came over her. "This one really wants to come out now!"

And it really did. It was wracking pain across her body like crazy. Ceara didn't know whether minutes or hours went by but the pain kind of blurred everything together. It only got worse when she started to push. Different hands came and went for her to hold as the pain increased. At first she saw Kougyoku, then Koumei. By the time the doctor told her 'one more push,' Alibaba had taken their place and was just as nervous and jumpy as before.

The doctor said push, so she did. And with it she heard a wonderful cry.

"It's a boy," she heard someone announce. Ceara was overjoyed but not enough to ignore the pain that she was still feeling and one that urged her to keep pushing. The doctor hastily returned as she did so and with that last push, there was utter relief.

Alibaba's voice rose over the rest and reached her ears with a chuckle. "T-They're twins!"

 _Twins?_

It took a while for them to be cleaned and for her to be tended to but once they were, Parisa and Kougyoku came up to Ceara as Koumei helped her sit up from the bed.

In their arms were a couple of bundles both with small messes of dark caramel hair. Surely, as they got older it would turn lighter like hers. Wanting to hold her two little ones, Ceara reached out. Parisa gave her the one she held first which she cradled in her right arm while the one Kougyoku gave her snuggled against her left arm.

 _They're so small._

So much smaller than Kohaku and Yuu when they were born. When she voiced her concern, Parisa waved her hand off dismissively.

"It's normal," she assured Ceara, "having two and having them small is completely normal. You'll just have to take a bit more care of them to make sure they stay healthy." She gave her a grin then and pointed her thumb out towards the door, "By the way, there's a couple of little devils who are beyond eager to meet their new brothers."

Ceara smiled and nodded, asking Koumei to bring them. He came back a few minutes later with Sousei and Suisei who had been caring for her children. Kohaku and Yuu came in on either of Sousei's arms while Suisei strutted in behind him. Urging him closer, Sousei kneeled before her bed to allow Kohaku and Yuu a better look.

"Look, Haku, Yuu—" Ceara loosened the grip on her newborn sons if only to allow them to move freely and for her older children to see them, "—they're your new baby brothers."

"Two!" Kohaku cheered with an giddy chuckle.

"That's right, Kohaku. Two new brothers."

"Baby," Yuu cooed and reached out to touch. Ceara reminded him to be very careful and that put him on the spot. Thankfully, Yuu was careful enough and simply poked the nose of the older twin, his birth denoted by the little red ribbon that Parisa tied to his wrist. His younger twin bore the same ribbon but in a blue color. Yuu quickly retracted his hand when the baby squirmed but giggled when it smacked its lips. "Soft."

"They are, aren't they?" Ceara murmured. The tiny little boys opened their eyes a tiny bit and from it Ceara saw their eyes. They were a vibrant crimson tinted in gold but were much too soft to be like their father's.

"So, Ceara-nee," Sousei called out from behind her children, "what are their names going to be?"

 _Names._ Neither she nor Kouen had thought this bundle would end up being double. The name they picked out wouldn't do. _I suppose I must improvise._ Her gaze wandered for a second and came to Sousei and Suisei. At that instant, she gave it some thought and came up with the perfect names.

"The oldest one will be Kourei." Ceara gave Kourei, the one with the red ribbon around his wrist, a small kiss atop his head. Kourei squirmed for a bit before gurgling. "The youngest will be Kousei." She gave another small kiss to the cheek of the one with the blue ribbon. Kousei stayed quiet and simply shifted his head towards her warmth. "And they'll be my little stars."

"Sei and Rei," Suisei said softly under her breath. Chuckling, she gave her brother a glance and the two grinned.

"Then I suppose it's fine if we call them Seichi and Reichi, right?" Sousei called with a grin of his own.

"Sei! Rei!" Kohaku and Yuu chanted in between chuckles, repeating the chant quietly when Ceara hushed them a bit.

"We should leave them to rest," Koumei suggested. The smile in his face clearly told her that he was more than happy for her and about the blessed names of her twins. He began ushering people out that needn't be there.

Ceara kissed Kohaku and Yuu goodbye. "Be sure to behave for _Shushu_ Souchi and _Gugu_ Suichi while mama gets some rest, alright?" They gave a chorus of yeses that eased her mind. Everyone as they left gave their congratulations and wishes for a quick recovery. Parisa and Kougyoku were the last to leave as they placed her children in the cradles that had been placed next to her bed.

Parisa smiled and bowed. "I'm sure you'll be wanting them nearby. However, I'll be close to care for them while you rest. So do rest assured, Miss of Eriu."

"Thank you, Risa." Ceara reached out to Kougyoku as she smiled, ready to leave the room.

"And don't you worry about anything, anegimi." Kougyoku held her hand tenderly and smiled before placing it on her bedside. "I'll be sure to take care of everything with everybody's help. You just focus on getting your due rest."

Ceara smiled and squeezed Kougyoku's hand. "I know you will. But that's not why I stopped you." Kougyoku's brow furrowed and prompted Ceara to continue. "I never expected two, in all honesty. Kouha might have some trouble with them by himself. What I'm asking is if you'd like to be their godmother too."

Shock came over Kougyoku's face before it turned into pure bliss and amazement. The young empress came to take her hand and squeeze it before she answered. "I would be honored." And so they agreed on it.

Kouha would be Rei's godfather while Kougyoku would be Sei's godmother. Frankly, Ceara couldn't think of anybody better.

The two left thereafter leaving her to some blissful silence. Silence except for the calm fluttering of the rukh that surrounded her. But even that seemed quite monotone with how tired she was. It didn't help that Rei's and Sei's soft breathing sounded so soothing to her. Soon enough, Ceara's exhaustion took over and she fell asleep.

* * *

It took six months for the Kou Trading Company, now known as the Fanfan Trading Company, to rise to the level of its competitors. Although the majority of this achievement started with their food production line and their patent of the teleportation magic circles for transportation, the selling of the tiagram talismans itself was what broke the proverbial glass ceiling for them. People were now capable of creating their own inventions with those talismans they bought from Fanfan and it spurred an industrialization the kinds she never imagined possible.

She thought three years of Sinbad's hand had been incredible to create this new world of peace. But seeing what Alibaba accomplished in less than the appointed year had truly been a miracle in the making.

 _What a turn of events._

A lot of things seemed to have changed because of him. Ceara managed to return to Rakushou, to Kou, to her home. Her children got to know more of the amazing people she called a family. And what was more, her two baby boys were born in the city where her husband and their father had grown. That was another thing that surprised her and made her heart soar with love for the people she now called a family. Although they were not a princess or princes by title, the people that knew of the nature of their heritage acted almost as if they were. But Ceara could see that even those who knew nothing of their heritage other than they were of the Ren Family, came to love her children.

They came to love Kohaku, the rowdy little girl that had the free spirit of a bird and a golden heart, something she was sure she got from both of them. They came to love Yuu, the quiet boy that was more curious about the outside and the wonders this wide new world had to offer than even her or her father combined. And they loved little Rei and Sei, who were little cherubs full of wonder for their new home and family.

Truly things were going smoothly. To her relief, Koumei also managed to figure a way to deliver letters to Samon—of course with Kougyoku's permission and secretly from the rest of the palace. And it was there how he managed to inform her husband about the new additions to their growing family. It saddened her that she couldn't do this in person and that for the first time, he had missed the birth of his children. But she supposed that knowing she and their children were doing fine in Rakushou would have to suffice for now.

Despite her wanting to return, Ceara knew that there was still plenty to be done. The year that Sinbad had given Kou had yet to expire. Ceara wanted to make sure that the man wouldn't interfere yet again with Kou's resurgence. And if staying some more months until it was over and she could be assured that Kougyoku had everything she needed to continue her regime, then she would stay.

A regime that she was now ready to claim of her own volition. The young empress should be at the Tenzen Plateau where the assembly of the International Alliance would be held. As nervous as she had been about it, Kougyoku had come to her to vent the night before. She told her little of what she intended to do, but Ceara really didn't need to know in order to encourage her.

"Kougyoku, I'm sure that whatever it is you have decided to do will be the best choice. If it is your choice, then you have nothing to be nervous about. Hold your head high and remember that it's normal to be afraid."

Kougyoku smiled, tearing up a bit at hearing words she surely hadn't heard in three long years. Her empress nodded, determination coming to her delicate features. "But I won't let it hold me back."

Surely, Kougyoku was before Sinbad and the rest of the Alliance by now. But there was no worry in Ceara's mind that everything would turn out fine.

Setting that aside, Ceara focused on her task at hand instead. Today, surely, would be another busy day. Ever since she got better from Rei and Sei, Ceara made the best of her free time which was rather limited with two newborns and two infants. Nonetheless she made it work in order to help Seijin with the orphan houses. Just like he had said, after Kou regained trust from the people it was much easier to work in order to establish these institutions. Although they weren't for housing anymore, the Houses stood mainly as educational establishments now and stood strong indeed because of it. Aside from the one in Shika, six months had given them enough time to re-establish the one in Rakushou and Balbadd and even open ones in the Eastern Isles. Currently, they were even negotiating with Magnostadt and Reim to establish new houses. And since these services were established under the Fanfan Trading Company's name, they added more to Kou's newfound integrity.

As for the memoirs...Ceara had returned to being its author as Ceara of Eriu. Now that Kougyoku let it slip that their Imperial Strategist was in actuality Ren Koumei, there hadn't been any further need for her to hide her own identity. Not many were happy but because their empress deemed it to be fine, they had no voice to complain with. A part of her wanted to think that it also had to do with the fact that she had helped them alongside Koumei. Perhaps their view of her was changing. If theirs could be changed, Ceara thought that the mind of the masses could as well.

So instead of letting Seijin carry on the memoirs like they had planned to, Ceara asked for the task back. Seijin had no reason to deny her.

"You started this endeavor," he told her when she had asked for the memoirs returned, "I think it fitting that you be the one to finish them."

So she took them. At first, she thought that people would oppose. But it appeared that just like she had hoped, they had seen past what had happened and put their trust again in her hands. Ceara honestly believed that all this renew hope was due to what Sou and Sui did. It felt like it, at least.

And because they were now in an era of peace, there was a clear end goal. No more wars meant no more losses. No more losses meant that any future stories could be told by others. All she needed to focus on were the stories of a past long gone. Gone but not forgotten.

"It's nice to see you so happy, Miss Ceara."

Hearing his voice after such a long time brought a smile to her lips. And it gladdened her that he had made it home safely. "Welcome back, Aladdin."

The young man that Aladdin now was stood before her, smiling warmly. Coming closer, he asked if he could accompany her for a while to which she happily agreed. Leaving things aside for now, she sat with Aladdin for some afternoon snacks. They shared some idle chatter at first. Because they had been busy announcing Alibaba's and Morgiana's wedding to their friends, Ceara had missed their first arrival. But now, she heard attentively to what the magi had to say, his eyes lighting with every description of the things he'd seen in the Dark Continent. She added her share of stories from Samon after their visit and certainly about the new addition to her family.

Aladdin chuckled at hearing this. "I'm sure Uncle Kouen must be extremely happy about that."

"I'm sure he is," she agreed with a chuckle of her own. Ceara took a sip of her tea before returning to gaze at the young magi. A thought came to her head, one she had been playing around with ever since the night Alibaba brought them back to Rakushou. "I'm sorry for being so abrupt about it, but I must ask—"

"It's about Miss Effie, right?" When Ceara couldn't well decipher the name, Aladdin shook his head and gave her a small yet somber smile. "I guess you know her better as Euphemia of the Dea Icaunis." Ceara couldn't help the tightening of her grip on her skirts. Aladdin nodded and took his staff from where he'd leaned it next to her desk. "Miss Ceara, what I can show you of Miss Effie is limited. Even I with Solomon's Wisdom aren't privy of things that existed before Alma Toran."

Ceara's brow furrowed at that statement. _Not privy to things that existed before his original world?_

"It's fine," she admitted, "whatever you can show me will help."

"Before I do, would you mind telling me why exactly you harbor so much hatred towards her?"

She couldn't believe the simplicity in his voice. If he knew about Euphemia, then she didn't understand how he didn't know about this cultist mentality that she harbored. Nonetheless, she gave him the benefit of the doubt and explained what she knew. She described what Euphemia had told her about wanting for her to bestow her children with Silver Echoes despite knowing how it would certainly shorten their lives. All in order to create this Champion that their so-called Master wanted for the world.

Aladdin hummed in understand as he tapped the end of his staff on his forehead. "That's...odd. Were those her exact words?"

Ceara nodded. "More or less."

"Mm. Well, let me show you what I know then." Gripping his hand on the spiked vines of his staff, he bled his palm slightly before letting his fist hover over his cup of tea. Once drops of blood had dropped, he casted magic on it, allowing a projection to appear between them.

The images were blurry at first but cleared up quickly to show a young man in glasses and strange robes holding a staff. Around him were seven different people. People of different tribes from Alma Toran she was guessing. What was more, despite being so different from each other, they held the same determined look in their eyes. And among the seven, she saw Euphemia. The only reason she recognized her was because she was exactly the same as how she saw her. Everything was the same. Everything except that blank look in her aquamarine eyes.

Ceara didn't know how to describe it. Only one word came to her that came remotely close to describing what she saw in those aquamarine eyes: life.

Aladdin pointed out Ugo, his djinn and friend from long ago, as the man with the glasses just as he began speaking.

"We have no way of knowing what can happen to you all by trying to do this." Ugo pursed his lips into a taut line and hung his head. "What we're asking of you could very well mean death. Or worse."

"Master Ugo, we know this." Ceara stared at the young woman that had spoken. Or at least what looked like a woman. Her body was covered in golden feathers and her face was a mix between human and birdlike. Ceara couldn't describe her even if she tried but what caught her attention the most was how bright her eyes were.

A bright emerald sheen.

The young bird woman fisted her chest and smirked. "We're all aware of this. We may not know the risks or what may happen to us when we get there. We know that there's the chance we could fail and end up trapped in that place along with her. But...we made up our minds. We choose to risk ourselves in order to let our people live on in this new world you seek to create."

It was Euphemia then who stepped up and smiled warmly, something that shocked Ceara since she had never seen such emotion from her, or any other for that matter. "Lord Ugo, she taught us to be compassionate. She taught us to be there for one another and those who cannot fend for themselves. But what is most, she taught us to have hope. And we share the hope that together we can succeed. We can retrieve Ill Ilah's gifts to Alma Toran that master told us about. We can make this new world of yours a reality for the sake of the people we love. So please believe in us."

"I do believe in you. You're her apprentices after all." Ugo couldn't help grimace at the thought of possibly sending them off to their death. "But what you're asking of me is to send you head first into something unknown. That dimension isn't something any of us was aware of in the first place. We know very little if anything about it. It exists outside of Alma Toran. Even Solomon thought better than to tamper with it and he could _see_ it. It's the reason why..."

He held his tongue. Whatever he had wanted to say brought him grief.

To Ceara's surprise, the smallest of the seven stepped forward and took Ugo's hands in her own. She was a child but in her large doe-eyes Ceara saw so much that it astounded her. Ugo seemed to have noticed what she had and let his lips tug upward into a small smile. The child simply smiled back and shook her head, her dark shiny hair bouncing back and forth. Those eyes—dark as the reddest blood but bright as the finest ruby—were tender as they gazed at Ugo.

Then she spoke.

"It is our choice, Ugo jiisan. She holds those gifts within her now. We know where they are. Effie-nee is right. Together, we can reach her. Together, we can retrieve them so that you can create the world in Alma Toran's image. This world...may not be salvageable anymore, and it is sad to see our home disappear. But a world isn't home without the people that make it so. We must do what we have to in order to make our 'home' survive. Have hope, Ugo jiisan. I do. No matter how dark and abysmal things may seem, I will always have hope."

"Ignis." Ugo's eyes watered a bit at their words but he wiped them off with his sleeve quicker than they could see. "Y-You're right. You guys, thank you for this and for everything up until now. I know it was hard to continue your work without her but you did splendidly. I will retain everything you ever collected, no matter what happens. I will safeguard what you spent your whole lives creating. And also...I'm sorry that nothing you wished for came true."

"What are you talking about, Master Ugo?" the bird woman called out with a cheerfulness that amazed Ceara. The grin that appeared on her was mirrored as smiles or grins among the other six. Even Ignis as she stepped back to rejoin them had a smile to her as she held her hands behind her back. "Our wish did come true. We have each other now." She reached out with her hands to wrap an arm around Euphemia and ruffling Ignis' hair. Her grin broadened as she turned back to face Ugo. "And if that's not what it means to have friends, then I have no idea what is."

The images began to break up and before Ceara knew it, the images disappeared and the clairvoyance magic was dispelled.

Aladdin regained her attention when she heard him move to straighten on his seat. "I have a few other memories concerning Miss Effie but they don't have anything to do with the seals or with the one they call master. This is the only memory from Alma Toran that exists about this."

"What about their journey?" Ceara asked genuinely curious.

"They made it," Aladdin assured her. That's something she could conclude herself though seeing as they were all alive here in this world. "But I have no memories that allude to anything about whatever happened during it. They traveled to a place outside of Alma Toran and returned, that is all we know for sure. Whatever happened in between that span of time, there's no way for me to know."

"I see." Ceara nodded and sighed. Despite her disillusionment of only having learned so little about Euphemia, she smiled warmly at Aladdin. "Thank you, Aladdin, for showing me all this."

The magi reciprocated the gesture. "You're welcome, Miss Ceara. I will be sure to help you more once everything settles down. I know that you're time is limited and that there's great things at risk but without knowledge I cannot be of much help."

"Where do you intend to get more knowledge if Solomon's Wisdom can't help you?"

At this, Aladdin grinned and sat back against this chair. "The Dark Continent is a dimension unlike any other. Even during Alma Toran it was exempt to a lot of the rules of the world. The same is true about it now as well. There must be some clue there and I think I might know just the person to ask. But, if I may, can I ask for your patience? Like I said once things settle down, you and I can head there and ask my friend directly."

The thought of going to the Dark Continent and meeting this friend of Aladdin's lighted a fire in Ceara's heart so fierce that she felt like her chest would burst. The simply idea made her giddy.

 _I could finally see the world. If only part of it for the both of us._

"I'll hold you to that promise then," she accepted with a smile. "I'm not fond of leaving my children at such young age either so I think it will be best for us to wait too."

"Of course." Aladdin grinned and reached out his hand. "Then it's a promise."

Ceara chuckled at his boyish grin but shook his hand firmly nonetheless. "It's a promise."

* * *

 _ **Epilogue**_

 _ **The Sixth Champion: Ceara of Eriu**_

* * *

Peaceful. Things were so peaceful now.

Ceara for once relished in the absolute silence that echoed in her room. Kohaku and Yuu were quietly asleep after having played for so long with Sousei and Suisei. Rei and Sei were taking their afternoon nap as well, completely fed and needing the rest. It truly was perfect for her to work on the memoirs.

Everything was quiet. Everything was still.

Then she felt it.

At first she couldn't breath. It was like something held tightly onto her lungs. Then it was her heart. It beat to a pace that wasn't her own; it's beating was incongruent with the panic that her mind raced with. All of a sudden her body felt heavy as if chains were wrapping around her body and neck to hold her down.

Her mind was quickly turning blanker the tighter the chains wrapped around her. The more they wound, the more she felt something was chipping away from her.

 _No. Leave me alone. Get off—_

"Get off of me!" she shouted.

The moment she did, Ceara felt the seal on her shoulder pulse with energy. That single lashing destroyed the chains and lifted the heaviness from her body. At the lightness, she dropped to her knees and held onto her shoulder. That surge of power exhausted her so much that it was unbelievable. Not even dispelling Euphemia had ever caused this debilitating sensation. Breaking those things had been harrowing.

Her eyes darted upward to her children but was relieved to see that she hadn't harmed them by accident. Giving herself a few seconds, she regained the necessary strength to stand and go to them. They were still asleep. The mere relief got her to fall by their bedside. It was almost as if nothing had happened.

 _Did I imagine this?_

No. That sensation—those disgusting chains—there was no way she imagined that.

"Shit. We're late here too."

Ceara couldn't believe her ears when Rakah's voice reverberated in her inner ear. Turning to where she had heard him, she watched as a teleportation magic circle opened. This one, however, wasn't like any other magic circle she'd seen before. This one fractured the light before her and bent into itself until a portal large enough opened.

From it, Rakah came out, a grimace on his face. Ceara couldn't believe what she was seeing. And by the amazed look on his face, Rakah hadn't expected to see her there either.

"Speirr?"

"Oh, she's here! Our timing was wonderful then."

The young woman's voice she heard caught her by surprise, especially when she couldn't see whom it belonged to despite knowing it came from the portal. Rakah clicked his tongue and glared behind him. "Did you even listen to what others say to you? I said that that bastard already took control over this one already."

"It's inevitable, Rakah ojiisan. It's something that's bound to happen. What we care about is that she's fine from its control."

Rakah gave Ceara a once over before he spoke. "You there, darling?"

"What the hell are you doing here? How the hell did you even get here?" Ceara shook her head and instead flared at him. "What in the hell happened?"

Her questions didn't garner any answers. What's worse, they got a crooked grin from him. "Yeah, that's her alright. Ever the patient and eloquent one."

"Good." Ceara's eyes widened as from the magic circle another figure appeared to come into her room.

A young girl came through and Ceara could easily tell that she was maybe Aladdin's and Seijin's age. She was dressed oddly, in a style she could only describe as similar to Alma Toran's people yet unique in its own way. In her hand, she held a magician's staff made of pure silver and etched in blue gems with the top curving like a crescent moon as if something was meant to be cradled in that space. She had skin on the darker side but not too dark. There was just the faintest kiss of the sun on her skin. Her wavy midnight blue hair was short from behind but was enough for it to be tied into a small tuft of hair springing at the back of her head; long bangs fell over her shoulders almost reaching her stomach. The bright emerald loc hair tie she used popped out as did the small medallion that was emblazoned with a symbol that she thought seemed familiar. There wasn't a clear name in her head, though, but she did recall it being from another country.

What shocked her most were her eyes. Eyes of molten gold.

Her large doe-eyes gazed down at her and widened in worry. Concern etched on her young, pretty face, she trotted over to Ceara before falling to her knees and putting her staff down.

"Are you okay, Miss Ceara?"

Her voice had a lilt to it as she said her name. It sounded like Rakah's but just not as pronounced. "I-I am," Ceara admitted. The girl helped her back on her feet as Rakah approached them. "Who are you? Why are you here? What the hell happened just now…?"

"The rukh of this world was rewritten," Rakah explained to her.

 _Rewritten?_ "As in changed? How? What does that even mean?"

"Sinbad hijacked the Sacred Palace." That place, Ceara had heard about it from Aladdin. It was where he was raised by Ugo. "And it means that this whole world now yields to that man's will."

"What?"

"Miss Ceara, what you felt just now—those chains?—they were your rukh being rewritten. Or at least trying to be." The young girl smiled though as she stepped back to pick up her staff. "But because of what you possess, because of Silver Echoes and because you're in Miss Euphemia's direct line of descendancy, you were strong enough to divert that rewriting."

"So...I'm still me?"

"Lucky for us, yes," Rakah replied as his shoulders slumped. "But things won't be calm for much longer. What Sinbad intends to do won't be good for anybody."

"Please, stop with this ambiguous talk." Ceara stepped back and faced the young girl and glared. "Tell me who you are?"

Rakah eyed the girl that stood beside him curiously as if awaiting for her to answer. The girl didn't give him a glance and instead smiled at Ceara and bowed her head slightly.

"My name is Basia Calore. I hope you can forgive my rudeness but we are in a hurry. We must leave immediately." Basia swept her staff behind them—the staff flared with energy that sprouted to line the curve around the outside of the crescent with bright blue wings that grew smaller as they reached the staff; on the vacant space an orb of the same bright blue sprouted and glowed brightly—and opened the portal anew, the fractals of golden shards breaking apart to open a doorway.

Ceara however stepped back away from them. "I have no idea why you would even think I would go with you to wherever you'll take me. Forget that I don't know what the hell you're up to, I will not be leaving my children where something terrible will happen. I won't leave them where somebody's changed their rukh and will."

"Oh, your little devils weren't affected."

She couldn't believe what her ears heard Rakah say. "What?"

"They share your lineage. And although the bloodline has thinned, it is still effective." Basia came forward towards the bed and smiled. "They look just like you and Kouen ojiisan!"

"You know…?"

"Yes," Basia replied giving her back to her children and facing Ceara once again. "And I also know that you don't want to do what Miss Euphemia wants of you. I know you'd rather fight and find a way to stop this than ever give it to your children." Ceara saw as the grip Basia had on her staff tightened. "And I know this because it is the same thing that the remaining bearers want as well. They don't wish for the relay to continue. They want to stop it. And I've found a way to do that without any of you dying."

Impossible. _But could it be a chance that she has?_

No, her mind shouted at her to doubt the girl before her. Ceara knew nothing of her and what she knew of Rakah didn't put any trust on anybody he was friends with. But the part of her that wanted to believe, the part that had hope, wanted to trust her.

There was something about her...something that simply told Ceara that the girl wasn't lying. It was the same thing that told her she could trust her.

"Even if I did believe you," Ceara began with a hint of hesitance in her voice, "I won't leave my children here. I don't trust the people who've gotten their rukh rewritten like you said to care for them."

"That's understandable." Basia gave her a knowing nod before motioning to the portal. "Where we're going it is safe for now. It's not connected to your world or any other. Not even god himself could reach it because of the walls separating it from the rest of the worlds. Another has already brought her son as well, fearing the same as you. So please, bring them with you and come with us. There isn't much time for leisure."

"Why?" Ceara asked wanting one last answer before she came up with her answer. "Why isn't there time?"

"Because to stop this once and for all, we have to reach a world where all this is already reaching its peak." Rakah's explanation confused her but when Ceara thought about it in the sense of how Alma Toran and her own world were two completely separate entities, it became a little clearer to her. "In that place, the clock is ticking down. The walls become thinnest then and that's how we came to get you. Only now is when we could bring you along. But just like we can use that to our advantage, so can those that are trying to stop us. That's why we need to round you all at the core."

"The core…"

"The original world," Basia told to her. "The one where all the others, including this one, branch off from. If we can change the outcome at the core, it will have ripple effects on its branches. If we stop things there, we will help stop them here and in all the others as well. Miss Ceara, this is why we're here. Even Rakah ojiisan changed his views. Despite all the things he's done to you all, he's agreed and willing to try this as a last shot to end the relay of the gifts. The others as well have decided on their own to do this. That is why I'm asking you, Miss Ceara—" Basia reached out to offer her hand to Ceara, "—come with us in order to stop it all. To stop the destruction of the world, the relay, and save yourselves and those you love."

To stop this all. To save her children, to save her family, she would do anything.

 _That hasn't changed._

And it never would.

"If that's what's at stake then I will go."

Basia's smile widened and she nodded. "Thank you, Miss Ceara. Now, let's wake them and get going." As Basia helped Ceara wake her groggy toddlers and carry the twins, Rakah approached her with a bag that clanked as he waved it around.

"Here." Rakah exchanged Rei with the bag, reluctant as Ceara was about giving him her son. She took it nonetheless and opened it, gasping as soon as she saw what was inside. "We had to retrieve them now since you're only their master in this world. You'll need them."

 _Beleth. Marbas. Murmur._

" _My king."_

 _"My king."_

" _My king."_

Ceara couldn't help but smile as she placed her metal vessels on her, loving the warmth that she had missed for three long years. "It's been far too long, my friends."

"We should leave," Basia suggested, trying to handle Sei in a way that wouldn't wake him up. Kohaku groggily held onto her staff with one hand and rubbed her eyes with the other as she walked. Yuu did the same while holding onto her sister's clothes. Ceara took Rei back from Rakah and followed behind him and beside Basia as they entered the magic circle.

A small pressure came over her for an instant before it dissipated. When she opened her eyes, Ceara saw nothing but a grand expand of green beneath the bluest sky she'd ever seen and in the far horizon she saw a lone tree, one bare of any leaves and its bark a dark putrid color.

Basia took them all to the grand oak that stood in the plain and set Sei down on the floor. Kohaku and Yuu went to their baby brother at her mother's request as she herself set Rei down next to his twin.

"Will they really be safe here?"

Basia nodded and waved her staff as a small bubble of blue energy came off from the orb. It wavered in shape like a bubble of soap until it shook to form tiny arms and a tail with two white spots that she assumed to be the eyes. "Care for them alongside Theo-kun, would you?"

The little wisp of blue nodded once. A strange noise came from it, like a high squeak, before it parted into two and then again into four. Once they separated they transfigured into larger beings with a human silhouette before they rounded about her children. They seemed to be able to speak in a way she didn't understand but that Kohaku and Yuu fully did.

It was unnerving to say the least.

"My wisps are extensions of my rukh given form by my life magic. They'll take good care of your children, Miss Ceara, of that I can assure you."

"Oh, baby Bass, you're back. About time!"

"Basi, thank god you're here."

Ceara turned to the two new voices that came to her ears. The first one had a heavy accent and drawled on but had a kind of mellowness to it. The second had been a worried voice with a lilt very similar to Basia's.

"Yes, and we retrieved her just fine as well!" Basia called as she turned to face the two women she'd heard. Ceara did the same to find them standing behind her along with a young boy that clung to one of them.

"Your Effie's successor, I presume." The taller woman grinned tenderly as she laid a hand atop the young boy's head as he clung to her leg. Her hair was long and of an auburn color, her eyes shining brightly with an emerald sheen. The feathers behind her right ear bristled as the grin widened. She shared many of her soft features with the boy along with the feathers and bright green eyes. But it was those same eyes, a strange feature whose origin eluded her, that seemed to carry fierceness in such little boy. "Oh wait that's my bad, you're name is Ceara, right? You're not Effie." That realization seemed to come to the woman quite heavily, as if the fact saddened her, but her demeanor quickly changed back to the cheerful one before she continued. "That's good in my books, anyway. You'll be better than her, I'm sure. My name is Noé."

"Speirr...?" The tenderness with which the other woman called her name made her turn confused. Bright red eyes gazed at her with that same tenderness she had heard in her voice before a smile spread across her full lips.

"No, Ish." Ceara glanced back at Rakah who gave her one long glance before turning to the woman with a smile just as sad as hers was. "She ain't our, Speirr. She's Ceara of Eriu."

The woman's eyes began tearing up at that but her smile grew wider for some reason. She nodded her head vehemently as if ridding herself of some notion and making her dark midnight hair sweep about. She wiped at her eyes with the heel of her hand before smiling again. "Nice to meet you, Ceara. My name is Ishtar. Ishtar Calore."

"Calore…" Ceara couldn't help but stare back at Basia as she came over to that lady's, Ishtar's, side. The hair had made her think it but the name had only solidified her thought. "Your daughter."

Ishtar nodded but the smile disappeared from her lips as determination took over. "She was the one that brought us together. All to end the relay of the gifts once and for all."

"Glad that you all get to introduce yourselves to each other," Rakah called with a wave of his hand, "but we have to get going. Our world's destruction isn't going to wait on us."

"And neither are we," Noé called out with just as much determination. Her features softened though as she turned to her son and knelt before him. "Be good, Theo. I will come for you when it's all over."

The boy, Theo, nodded as the feathers behind his left ear drooped. "Be careful, mom." He threw himself at her arms and held her tightly as she did. "...I love you."

"I love you too."

Ceara turned away from the scene to see her own children that now stared up at her as she approached them.

Kohaku tilted her head as she knelt before them. "Mama?"

Ceara cradled her cheek in one hand and took Yuu's in her other. "Kohaku, Kouyuu, mama has to go for a little bit."

"Mama go?" Yuu repeated, tears springing up from his eyes already. That he wanted to cry didn't help Kohaku restrain herself as her own tears began to come as well.

"No, Haku don't want you to go," Kohaku cried. She threw herself at Ceara just as Yuu did and Ceara held onto her children tightly before kissing both their heads.

"I don't want to go either. But mama has to go save our family."

"What's wrong?" Kohaku asked.

"Something bad. It wants to hurt mama and baba, your uncles and aunts, and all the nice friends you made back in the palace."

"No!" Kohaku shrieked, her tears falling as she shook her head. "No hurt my family. I love mama and baba. I love everybody."

"Which is why I'm going to help them," Ceara assured her, wiping their tears with her thumbs. "But I'll be back. And once I am, we'll go back home to baba. But for right now, mama wants you to stay here. You'll be okay here. Can you promise me you'll wait for mama?"

Kohaku and Yuu wanted to cry and protest. They wanted to. She could see it in their puffy eyes. But her brave little sun and moon only nodded.

"Thank you," she whispered and kissed their foreheads. "Take care of each other and of your little brothers for me."

Kohaku and Yuu hugged her once more before they both said a quiet 'I love you.' Ceara now wanted to cry. She didn't want to leave them but if this is what it took to make all this better. To safe everybody and stop this once and for all, then she would.

For them. For her family. _Always._

"I love you too." Getting up was the hardest thing to do for Ceara. It hurt every fiber of her being to leave them but she did. As she got up, a little red head bobbed up from her side to her children.

Sheepishly, he turned to Ceara with a smile. "I-I'll take care of them for you, Miss. Since I'm the oldest here, Mom said that I have to take care of the little ones." He took a deep breath, letting the feathers behind his ear bristle. "So don't you worry. We'll wait here for you and mom."

Ceara couldn't keep the smile from coming to her lips at the little boy's bravery. "Then I'll leave them in yours hand, young man. Take care of yourselves."

Turning before she could regret it, Ceara walked up to the odd group that had gathered.

"Don't you worry your pretty little head." Ceara glanced up at Noé as the taller woman placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed good naturedly. "We'll be back before you know it." Curiously enough, Ceara saw the same anguish that she felt in Noé. Leaving their children behind would be hard. But this was for the best.

"Alright, ladies," Rakah called out as he got his wand out. Basia beside him did the same thing and both motioned outward to cast a magic circle, creating the fractal opening of the portal. Ceara summed that this would be the one to take them to that world—the original one. "We're walking into hell so you'd better be ready."

"Right." Ishtar beside her held onto the hilt of a sword at her side before light engulfed her and Ceara watched as she djinn equipped and felt the heat emanating from her very being. Fire. Blue fire.

Not wasting a second, Noé garnered the same conclusion and equipped hers as well. The bright light that came from Noé almost blinded her but it was the grand golden wings that spread behind her that astounded Ceara. Light.

Being the last, Ceara lifted the feathered pen in her hands and touched it to her lips.

 _Here we stand, friend. Let's give this all we have to finally stop this._

" _Your wish is my command, my king."_

All at once, Ceara felt the powers of Beleth envelope her as she took the form she'd bestowed her. This power—Beleth's, Marbas', and Murmur's—that was a gift.

It was a gift bestowed upon her by beings that recognized her. Beings that became her friends after all that happened.

Friends, family, loved ones. Those were gifts. And the love, friendship, and hope that they gave them were the kind of gifts that should be passed on. And that was what she would do.

 _For them..._

Ceara might not have been the Champion that Euphemia wanted her to be. She would not save the world because she told her to. She wouldn't save them because it was her legacy. Ceara would save them because it was what she wanted to do and certainly not the way Euphemia wanted. She would stop this and the relay of the gifts to save them.

 _I'm not the champion you wanted me to be. No, I'm much more than that._

Ceara would be the champion that she deserved to be for her loved ones and for herself.

 _Always for them and for myself._

Without anymore hesitation, Ceara followed beside the other four and stepped through the magic circle.

* * *

 _A/N_

 _Silent Lamb started on Nov 10, 2016. On Sep 22, 2017 it now ends. This story started as a quaint little idea for D. Gray-Man, then it settled down not finding what it needed to flourish. A year later, I find myself watching Magi and then reading it only to fall in love with the series. It inspired me to revisit that quaint little idea that suddenly burst to life with all the new magic I found. Now both Magi and Silent Lamb reach their end. Magi soon enough, but I am proud and sad to say that Silent Lamb is now complete._

 _This is far from the end for me and Magi though. I love the series to no end and will continue with this fanfic series that I've set for myself. Silent Lamb was supposed to be a stand alone fic. Now it's sprouted into something I never thought it would. And I hope that you all will accompany me down this long, winding road I'm taking._

 _Ceara. Noé. Rakah. Ishtar. Basia._

 _These are all names that you will see more of in the series as a whole. Although Silent Lamb ended, this will certainly not be the last you hear of Ceara. Although it might be a while before she returns, I can promise you that much at least. That can also be said about some minor characters that have appeared in Silent Lamb._

 _As a last gift to you, and since I am pretty sad about seeing SL end (especially b/c Kouen is and always will be my most favorite character in Magi ( ´•̥̥̥ω•̥̥̥` ), is that I'll accept any kind of requests if you want to send them. Take it as a little scenario or headcanon thing, if you will. I've always wanted to start one as a side blog on my tumblr but haven't found myself brave enough to start it_ _（_ _*/∇_ _＼_ _*_ _）_ _. Maybe one day, but take this as a little gift and sneak peek to what could be one day. Digressing, I'll compilate an extra chapter just for extras and omakes. So anything you want to ask, just go ahead and do and I'll do my best to give you cute or sad or any kind of moments you want to see with Ceara or any other character from this story. It will be sometime before I upload that, though, since I want people to have time to request what they like. So go crazy with it people! ⤴︎ ε=ε=(_ ง _˃̶͈̀ᗨ˂̶͈́)_ ۶ ⤴︎

 _Also a huge thank you to magi-related from tumblr ( ˘ ³˘) . I commissioned this lovely person to have another picture of Ceara. With how this came out, I'll surely be commissioning them in the future for the other characters as well. I always thought that art tells more than words, and in this case, it's true. Plus I love seeing my babies come to life like that. By the time I post this, though, it won't be finished just yet. And since I didn't want to leave you guys waiting for this behemoth, I'll just be reposting the chapter with the proper link to the commission once it's done. You can come back later or just check out my tumblr ( xeveningx) to see it if you think you'll miss it._

 _And because it's been such a short span between chapters, I'll just give a huge thank you to everybody who stuck with this story for the past ten months. Crazy, right, that it's been that long? I have every one of you lovelies to thank for encouraging me forward, whether you reviewed, followed, favorited, or read it, I give you a huge ol' thank you and a lot of hugs and kisses_ _._ _〜_ ٩ _( ╹▿╹ )_ ۶ _〜_ _I truly couldn't have done it without you all being there and encouraging me on._

 _Also a sidenote:  
I know a lot of you won't be pleased with how Masami ended. I was really amazed how a lot of you wanted her to just be dealt with because of how cruel she had been throughout the story, no matter her reasons for being like that. And because of that I almost know that what I've written as her conclusion might not satisfy those people. But the way I see it is that there was no more need for violence. The way that these characters grew to be, especially Ceara, told me that violence would only perpetuate a never ending cycle of sadness and hatred. The point of this whole story was for Ceara to grow from her own cycle of sadness and hatred and learn from that. And she did in my eyes. She ended one cycle (one that she had a part of) knowing that despite how everbody ended, things couldn't have ended better or worse. They just were. Overall, it was acceptance that I was trying to portray in that scene. Something along the lines of, things may not have ended the way you expected them or think that these characters didn't get what they deserved like they do in pretty or totally conventional stories (the good guy wins and the bad guy loses) but things seemed to have somewhat fallen the way they should have in the end to me. _

_So for now, I'll leave you how I always have. I really, really hope you enjoyed this chapter and Silent Lamb as a whole! And also stay tuned, all you lovelies, for what the future brings for what I've dubbed the Gift Bearers Series. Hope to see you all next time when we delve into Noé's story: "The Meanderer."_ _ヾ_ _(*_ _･_ _ω_ _･_ _*)o_


	18. Extras: Part I

_**-x-x-x-**_

 _ **I. A Child's Sentiment**_

 ** _-x-x-x-_**

Hakuryuu could not fathom how Miss Ceara dealt with her children. Much less how Kouen did in the state he was now in. He supposed that having Koumei and Kouha at Samon had been of great help but still. Even with the extra hands now, Miss Ceara certainly seemed to have her hands full with the two newcomers.

Rei and Sei were only weeks old. As such, Miss Ceara had given most of her attention to them, and although not completely leaving the other two, Hakuryuu could tell that Kohaku and Kouyuu started to get cranky with the lack of attention from their mother. It made him wonder if he'd been like that when younger.

But he digressed as Miss Ceara wandered off from their work to tend to the small newborns. Because of her load, Kougyoku had asked him to help Miss Ceara out with work she'd put onto herself and that she was adamant about finishing. So here he was with her. Despite having told her multiple times that he could certainly handle something like this alone, she remained steadfast about finishing it. Soon the morning came and went and around the afternoon, her little ones finally needed their time to sleep again. After putting the twins to their naps, he couldn't help but notice how exhausted she appeared. But even with how she was, Hakuryuu could tell that Kohaku and Yuu were going to have none of that.

"Mama, play!" Haku whined while pulling at her mother's skirts.

"Play, play!" Yuu called out too as he pulled her sister along.

Miss Ceara heaved a sigh but amazingly kept a smile on as she talked to them. "How about later, sweetie. Mama's really tired."

"But Mama said that last time!" Kohaku complained, pulling harder.

"Now!" Yuu cried out being a little too loud. Hakuryuu cringed and on instinct—or god knew what came over him—laid his hands on top of Kohaku's and Yuu's heads making both toddlers face up to him.

"How about I play with you?"

" _Shushu_ Ryuu?" Yuu asked, having gotten used to calling him uncle incredibly fast.

"You don't have to," Miss Ceara told him, but the yawn that escaped her made him all the more determined to help. Poor woman was tired beyond belief. She was a good mother to these kids and she needed her rest. And if keeping these two occupied for a while was what it took for her to get it, then he didn't see the problem.

"It's no bother, really," he assured her instead, squatting down to the level of the two little ones and smiling. Haku stepped back but Yuu smiled at having his head patted. "We can go play ourselves, right?"

"Yeah! Shushu Ryuu play!" Well, at least he was excited. Kohaku wasn't as much but Yuu managed to convince her somehow. Miss Ceara thanked him deeply and said that she would make most of the time he gave her. Hakuryuu simply smiled before taking the toddlers out of the room.

At first there was an awkward silence. Despite the bravado and assurance he wanted to portray for her, Hakuryuu didn't know the first thing about taking care of children. Having been the youngest of his own family warranted that they mostly took take of him.

"What are we gonna do?" The moment Yuu asked him this Hakuryuu froze. He had no idea either. Thankfully, at that precise moment, Yuu's stomach growled loudly.

"H-How about before going to play we go to the kitchen and grab an afternoon snack!"

"Snacks!" Yuu exclaimed and grabbed tightly onto Hakuryuu's hand before nodding and babbling a tune about snacks.

"Are you alright with that too, Kohaku?" The little girl pouted as if annoyed but nodded slightly and didn't really grab onto his hand like Yuu did. Not taking that to heart, Hakuryuu took the two to the kitchen where the maids were more than happy to put a small something together for the two. Soon enough they had plates full of cut up pieces of fruit, all different types and all delicious by the faces he saw them give as he sat back.

The time it'd take them to eat would be enough for Hakuryuu to figure out what to do. There was plenty he could think of that they could do but then again, he wasn't sure if the type of things he thought of were appropriate for a couple of toddlers of barely three and two. But he had to think of a way and fast.

"What the hell? Hakuryuu, you got degraded to a damn nanny? Shit, that's a new fucking low."

Hearing that last sentence got Hakuryuu to react and turn quickly about to meet Judar's eyes as he entered, snickering at the sight. "Would you refrain from that language?"

"Language?" Judar repeated and scoffed. "Weren't you the same, though?"

 _He has a point._ Nevermind that. "Not in front of the children, you idiot," he hissed under his breath. His gaze fell back to them as they ate their fruit tenderly, Kohaku giving Yuu the ones he liked rather than eating them herself. Judar fell into his field of view then as the magi stepped forward, his view shifting from the toddlers to Hakuryuu.

"Why do you have _Taozi's_ brats?"

"I'm taking care of them while she rests. Why do you call her peach?" Hs question fell on deaf ears as Judar went over to Yuu's side and picked at the peaches that Kohaku had given him. It took Yuu a moment to realize that his favorite fruit had been taken away, but the instant he did, tears began to well up in his eyes which sent Hakuryuu into a panic. Before he could eat it, he snatched the piece of fruit from Judar and placed it back onto Yuu's plate. "What is wrong with you?"

Judar, not one to give up so easily, kept trying to reach for the fruit while Hakuryuu pushed him back and Yuu kept his dish close to himself knowing what the magi's aim was now.

"What's wrong with _you_?" Judar groaned, stepping back and giving up for the moment at seeing Hakuryuu's stubbornness. "It's a damn piece and I'm hungry."

"Ask the maids and leave theirs alone then."

"But those are already peeled."

"It's theirs and they're kids, for goodness sake."

"That's got jackshit to do with me." Judar pushed back Hakuryuu who kept interfering, their little pushing and shoving becoming worse every time. It kept going for a while until both tired of it, like the little kids they themselves were. Annoyed as he was, Judar pulled out his wand and expanded it to a staff. "Alright, asshole. You're getting on my nerves. Move or else."

"You wouldn't," he hissed but certainly knew better. Hakuryuu wouldn't put it past him. Especially where his favorite dish was concerned. He knew that firsthand after having lived with the magi for such a long period of time.

"Try me." Judar's staff crackled with lightning but when his gaze fell behind Hakuryuu, he scoffed and stopped what he was doing. When Hakuryuu's brow furrowed in confusion, Judar gave a nod behind him. "See? They didn't even want it. Fucking waste."

Even more puzzled by his words, Hakuryuu turned about to find the seats that had been previously occupied completely empty. On the table, only the plates that had been served with plenty of leftover fruits were left. There was no trace of the two.

 _Shit._

"We have to find them. They couldn't have gone far."

"No, thanks. I'm hungry!" Judar brightly jested as he picked up the plate and plucked one of the peach slices from it, hovering it over his open mouth.

"There's no time for that!" Hakuryuu cried out before pulling the magi by his chunnari and dragging him out.

At first Hakuryuu's worry was small. After all, as small as they were, those two couldn't have gone far. Oh, how wrong he'd been. Twenty minutes into their search and there was still no sign of either one. Even when Judar—after some good convincing and a hit on the head—searched for them by flying overhead, neither Kohaku nor Kouyuu were anywhere to be found. They weren't outdoors which left the inside of the palace. But the place was huge. Finding them by searching every room would take hours.

 _Wait. I'm an idiot._

Dragging Judar back to his room, he took his spear and summoned Zagan. Judar watched curiously as the small sprouts began to rise from the floor and twine around the pole before reaching his hands.

"What are you doing?"

"Finding them." Hakuryuu was surprised he didn't think of it sooner. With Zagan, he could easily connect to every flora and fauna in the palace. And with the aid of magoi manipulation, he could use them instead to search every square inch of the palace. For a brief moment, everything was normal until Zagan told him about disturbances to his flora out towards the East.

The royal quarters.

"Found them. Let's go." Judar didn't complain this time, surprisingly, and followed behind him as they headed to the eastern parts of the palace. Approaching the room where Zagan had noticed the disturbance, Hakuryuu grabbed ahold of the door and jerked it open. The sight before him baffled him for a second. Feathers were everywhere, hovering downward like snowflakes during winter. Amongst the makeshift snow, Kohaku and Yuu jumped around on a couch, giddily laughing as the two held ripped pillows in their hands, the feathers coming out of them with every jump they gave.

"Kohaku! Yuu!" Both stopped immediately and turned to Hakuryuu as soon as they heard their names called out. The feathers hadn't even settled when he entered the room to reach them. "You shouldn't have—" He didn't get to finish his sentence. Instead he ate a mouthful of feathers when Kohaku threw her pillow which hit him square in the face.

Judar's cackling burst out at impact. The magi held his stomach as Hakuryuu stood stupefied by the action. Not wasting a second, he yanked the thing off his now red face and glared at the two toddlers. Yuu stood confused at her sister's actions but Kohaku glared back before taking her brother's hand and running away again.

"Ah, there they go," Judar commented as he wiped a tear from his eye.

"They won't get away this time." Hakuryuu held his spear taut and was about to summon Zagan before hesitating.

This wasn't right. Using Zagan to catch them, even if he was annoyed at their misbehavior, wasn't the right thing to do. He remembered for a fact that Hakuyuu and Hakuren were never mean to him when he misbehaved and acted like a brat, few as those times were. No, they talked to him and always with patience. He needed to have that same patience now. These were his br—Kouen's children after all. He didn't want to treat them unjustly. Calming down, Hakuryuu lowered Zagan and instead dragged Judar with him again as they ran after them.

This time, they didn't go far. The two got to the outer gardens by the time Hakuryuu began to catch up. Yuu was the first one to tire out and fall behind. Kohaku, however, didn't stop, though she appeared to be just as tired as her brother. Instead her eyes scanned the area before landing on a tree. Before Hakuryuu could reach her, she climbed quickly enough to be out of his reach.

Quickly checking Yuu and leaving him to Judar—no other option, really—Hakuryuu readied to climb but was surprised at the pebble that hit him on the forehead out of the blue. "Damn…" he groaned as he rubbed at the mildly sore spot. He tried to climb again after her but every time he did, she would throw another pebble from the bunch she'd picked up beforehand and climbed higher. And surprisingly, she kept hitting him in the same exact spot.

Judar let out a whistle and chortled. "Damn, that's good aim."

"Haku good climb!" Yuu added with an excited clap of his hands.

Instead of trying again, Hakuryuu glanced up from his place. Kohaku was pretty high up, almost reaching the canopy of the tree. She was a damn good climber indeed. Hakuryuu, though, focused on her ammunition instead. She had no more pebbles at hand, but she was high up there too.

"Kohaku, please come down. You'll get hurt."

"No!" she shouted.

"Why not?" Hakuryuu asked wanting to calm her down a bit from her apparent tantrum.

" **Because I hate you!"**

That declaration came to him as a shock. Kohaku hated him? That didn't even make sense. He met her once when she was one and again now. Those were few meetings from where to form an opinion of someone, especially at her young age. Shaking his head out of that, he focused instead on what was at hand. He could ask about that later.

"I don't believe that's true. How about we talk about it? Would you come down to talk about it?" Hakuryuu slowly crept closer to the tree as he spoke and by the end of his second question, he'd planted a foot on the base of the oak. Now that she was out of pebbles, he could climb safely without her throwing stuff at him.

"No! Get away!" she cried and instead climbed higher into the canopy. But on one of her steps, Hakuryuu saw the branch bending under her foot. Before he even shouted out his warning, Kohaku climbed and placed all her weight on it, making the branch snap. Hakuryuu reacted fast and grabbed a hold of Zagan before willing the vines from the floor to sprout out and break her fall midway. The vines cradled her tiny body and wrapped gently around her to secure her before Hakuryuu lowered her to him. Once he had his arm around her waist, he undid Zagan's vines but the moment he did, she began to struggle. The instant she did, he let go of his spear to avoid hurting her by accident and placed her on the floor to face her.

"Koha—Stop. Don't. Kohaku, stop right now."

"No!" She pried at his strong hold on her shoulders but cried out when she couldn't undo it. "Let go!"

"Not until you calm down." Hakuryuu held steadfast to the little girl for two or three minutes before she stopped. But not because she wanted to. He could tell just by the glare and tears in her eyes that she wasn't happy at all about this. But neither was he. "What were you thinking climbing up that high? You could've gotten seriously hurt, Kohaku."

"Mama would've come save Haku! I don't need you! I hate you!"

 _That again._

"Why do you hate me?" he asked not wanting to beat around the bush seeing as she wasn't having any of it.

At being asked that one question, she stopped completely and her puffy red eyes glared back at him with tears welling up. "Because of what you did to baba!" _To Kouen?_ "You—You took baba's legs and arm!"

"...took?"

"Not true!" Hakuryuu turned with Kohaku in his arms still to look at Yuu who was also upset now, his glare just as similar to hers. "Baba said!"

"Baba lies!" she shouted at Yuu as she unleashed her anger out. "He lies about not being tired! About not hurting! He lies and it's all because of him!"

"No! Baba and mama said no!" Yuu screamed louder, this time fighting with Judar who quickly let the kid down not wanting to deal with him. Kohaku did the same, kicking and scratching at Hakuryuu who couldn't do much except let her go. The instant they left them on the ground though, they began lashing at each other.

Kohaku was the first that throw a clean punch to Yuu's arm. The boy retaliated quickly by taking a strand of her hair and yanking hard. Judar cheered them on as Hakuryuu panicked over their fighting. Running up to them, he separated them easily to his relief, having to hold Kohaku under his arm and by her waist and keeping Yuu at a distance with a simple hand on his shoulder. Both were crying but mostly out of frustration, and their glares were intense against each other.

This...it didn't seem to Hakuryuu like it'd been the first time they fought this viciously. Even as he separated them they kept calling names at each other, mostly exchanging 'stupid' or 'idiot' as if they were playing ball. Finally fed up with their bratty attitude, Hakuryuu took a deep breath before raising his voice. "You will stop this instant!"

The two toddlers did as they were told out of shock. Even Judar, who'd been cackling in the background, saw himself stopping without meaning to. Hakuryuu looked at each in turn before putting Kohaku down and getting them at a safe distance in case they decided to fight again. Once things seemed a bit calmer, he addressed them.

"You shouldn't fight like this. You're siblings; you're suppose to take care of each."

"He's an idiot," Kohaku called still furious, "You too. I hate you."

"Yes, I know." Hakuryuu took another deep breath to calm himself before continuing. "And I believe an apology is due here."

"Apology?" Judar came closer to them and raised an eyebrow at his King Candidate. "You don't owe them squat. Didn't you say Entei gave you those limbs because he wanted to?"

"Lies!" Kohaku exclaimed to the air.

Yuu shook his head before and managed to reach Kohaku, wrapping his arms around his sister's and pulling. "No, mama said no. Baba said he give to little brother."

The redheaded girl looked into her brother's eyes as he stood on the verge of crying. Her own eyes welled up in heavy tears that threatened to fall too. But Hakuryuu saw a stubbornness in them as well. By the looks of it, she'd been told this all before but somehow hadn't accepted it. Perhaps she didn't even clearly understand. But she held steadfast to her own belief. A belief that was quickly starting to break before his eyes. "But baba's strong. He wouldn't…" Kohaku sniffled a bit before she fully started crying her lungs out. Yuu, affected by her emotions, followed suit quickly after.

Judar wanted to scream along with them but instead covered his ears and kicked Hakuryuu. "Do something!?"

He wanted to but...what?

 _What did Hakuyuu and Hakuren do when I got like this?_

Thinking about them brought along an idea. His brothers had always been kind and straightforward. They always told him things in a way that he understood and that made him feel better. It did so because they wouldn't leave him in the dark. Even if he didn't fully understand either back then, he understood the sentiment that they portrayed with the few words he could understand.

And he had nothing to lose in trying that too.

Reaching out, he wrapped his arms around the two and brought them closer, something that surprised and shocked the toddlers. Both spent from their fighting and crying, neither pulled away and it gave Hakuryuu time to think of how to phrase his thoughts.

"Your father…" he began quietly and gently for only them to hear, "is a man I never understood. One I still don't understand much. I don't get what made him do a lot of things, like how he gave me his arm and legs way before you two were born. I admit that I'm not a good man. Far from it. I've done things that I'm not proud of and some that I regret, but there's no denying that I did them. But both your father's and my actions are things that happened already; they're in the past. What matters, and what should always matter, is what we do now, in the present. I've...forgiven your father for a lot of things that happened in the past. And I like to believe that he forgave me for the things that I did too. I think his gift was a way to show that. We're...brothers, after all. I don't think we should fight anymore; I don't think either of us want to fight anymore. It's also what I think about Kohaku and Yuu."

Reaching back to take their hands, he linked them together and held them in his. "You love each other. Kohaku, you love Yuu a lot. You're a wonderful big sister to him by always taking care of him. And Yuu, you're a brave little brother. Even though you're younger, you pay attention to help your sister and set her straight when you think she's done wrong. You do good for each other, just like your father and I have done recently. Hold that to heart. Don't fight against each other; always be beside each other. You'll never find anything stronger than that bond you have as siblings. And Kohaku…"

His young niece for once looked him in the eye. There was no glare or ill will coming from her. There was simply a calm and slight curiosity as to what he had to say.

"Your father did give his arm and legs to me. I didn't take them. But I know you won't believe me if you hear it from me. But maybe, when you see him again, you can ask him yourself."

Kohaku stared wide-eyed at him as if he'd given her a sudden revelation that she never had seen before. Her other hand reached to her skirt and held it tightly in her hand, her pouting lip quivering it slightly. "Y-You think Baba will tell the truth?"

"Of course he will," he replied. Letting go of their joined hands, Hakuryuu cleaned away her tears with his sleeve before doing the same with Yuu. "If you ask him, I'm sure he will."

"Mm." Kohaku pursed her lips and pouted before turning to face her little brother. "I-I'm sorry, Yuu. About hitting you."

Yuu nodded back and wiped at his face with his own sleeve for good measure as his nose began to run a little. "Yuu too. Sorry."

Kohaku lowered her gaze before turning back to face Hakuryuu. "I'm sorry too, _Shushu_ Ryuu. Haku was...mean."

The meek way she spoke those words made Hakuryuu smile warmly as he patted her head. "It's alright. So long as you learn and understand." Things were a bit less tense after that which allowed Judar to come closer to them as Hakuryuu stood up from the ground.

He nodded their way as he held his hands behind his head. "What you gonna do with the brats now?"

Hakuryuu overlooked the two toddlers as they stood beside each other, having a normal chat it seemed. They had time to spare. And he actually had some things that he wanted to do now that he had time to think about them. He turned to the two to ask them and after hearing his proposal, they looked at each other before smiling and nodding. They were still full of energy it seemed.

"Well, whatever," Judar called out, changing his wand into his staff before readying to leave. "I have better things to do than stay with you and those snotty brats."

"Oh no, you don't." Before Judar could even cross through the teleportation circle he'd conjured, Hakuryuu caught him by his chunnari and kept him in place. The cocky grin Hakuryuu held was enough to tell Judar that he wasn't about to let him go either. "You're going to come with us, Judar."

"Huh? Like hell I am!" But his shouts and slight profanities did little to dissuade the toddlers that heard their uncle's proclamation.

"Yay!" they cheered as they ran up to Judar and grabbed his braid to pull him like Hakuryuu was. "Come play, _Shushu_ Ju!"

"Who the hell are you calling uncle!?"

Hakuryuu ignored the loud magi's protests and, between the three of them, they dragged him along. He kicked and punched all the way but eventually gave up when they came to the dining hall. It was already late, so some food was best for a start. Afterwards, they were more than ready to play. Not wanting to be outside as the night came, Hakuryuu convinced them to play in the room that was theirs now.

There he went about using his plan from before to entertain them for the night. Although small ideas—small crafts that Hakuei taught him when they were smaller mostly—the two appeared to enjoy working with their hands. Judar was the one that had the most trouble. Truly, it seemed to Hakuryuu that the magi was only good for fighting and ordering others around. But he coped pretty well. He did fight back a little when Kohaku wanted to decorate Judar's hair with the paper flowers he taught them to make, though. Judar didn't like the idea at all saying something about how he wasn't about to let her do that to him too like her mother had. Hakuryuu convinced him eventually to accept saying that children wouldn't do anything that bad.

He still refused. Vehemently. Hakuryuu kept dishing out excuses which Judar quickly dispelled away. He didn't realize that all the while they bickered, Hakuryuu had summoned flowers to sprout from the cracks near the walls behind the magi which Kohaku and Yuu quietly picked before carefully putting them at the end of his braid. Judar went ballistic when he finally noticed. It took a while for Hakuryuu to calm him down after that little stunt. Afterwards, though, he was a bit more relaxed about it and actually agreed to let them, or at least didn't complain about it as much anymore.

Now with permission, Kohaku undid the braid with Hakuryuu's help and before long she and Yuu played with his long hair, decorating it as they saw fit with the real flowers that Hakuryuu made sprout with Zagan and the paper ones they'd made. All the while, Hakuyuu kept Judar busy but talking to him for a change. And the subjects were pretty mundane; the empire, his sister, Kougyoku, Aladdin, and Alibaba even. They even spoke about their time in Judar's village.

"Which reminds me, I don't see why you don't like your name," Hakuryuu pointed out as he sat on the floor against the wall to be close to Zagan's metal vessel and easily be able to make flowers for the kids.

"It's ridiculous," Judar scoffed indignantly. The magi laid on the floor on his stomach as the two toddlers went about sitting to either side of him, each doing one half of his hair. "That name doesn't—Ah! Watch it brat—it doesn't suit me at all."

" _Shushu_ Ju's name?" Kohaku asked, her head popping up from hiding on the other side.

Hakuryuu nodded. "Judar isn't his name. Want to know what it is?"

Kohaku's smile widened and she nodded. Hakuryuu called her over to him which she quickly complied with. Wanting to stop the spread of it, Judar attempted to stand back up but Yuu climbed fast on his back to keep him there with his weight. A toddler was enough to keep a weakling like him there for the few seconds it took.

Not wanting to be overheard, Hakuryuu cupped his hand against her ear and whispered. Kohaku listened intently and chuckled, covering her mouth as she did.

"You ass!"

Hakuryuu knocked him over the head for that, getting angry about his constant profane language in front of them. "Knock it off."

Judar held his head and missed as Kohaku trotted over to her brother to whisper the secret. Yuu giggled when he heard it, making Judar even angrier about the decimation. He was about to say something when the two kids patted his head affectionately, catching him by surprise.

Kohaku spoke up for the two of them after a few pats. "It's okay, _shushu._ Haku and Yuu think your name is pretty!"

The magi blinked a couple of times, his fair skin tinting a bit—if from anger or embarrassment, Hakuryuu wasn't quite sure—before he slammed his face on the floor, his arms hiding away the rest of his face. He mumbled something against the floor which only muffled his voice further but Hakuryuu didn't really mind it. Judar exaggerated a lot. It did leave him compliant for the kids to do as much as they wanted with him.

After an hour or so, Yuu yawned. Like a sickness, it spread and made his sister yawn alongside him as she rubbed her eyes. After a glance out the window, Hakuryuu had to admit that it was getting late. Maybe putting them to sleep would be best. Without much trouble, he prepared the bed, undoing the comforter and putting pillows in place for them. "Come on, you two." Yuu stumbled to him to lay down and dozed off quicker than he expected. Kohaku came after and took Hakuryuu's hand with a small tug.

"What about _Shushu_ Ju?"

Hakuryuu turned to said magi and noticed how he'd fallen asleep in the midst of them playing with his hair. It seemed that he didn't completely abhor it, after all. Hakuryuu smiled and took one of the spare blankets before giving one end to Kohaku. Getting the gist of the idea, she helped him place the blanket over the magi who lazily turned about in his sleep. Once done, Hakuryuu lifted Kohaku in his arms before going back to where Yuu was and laid Kohaku next to him. He took the other side and yawned a bit as he propped his chin up to watch over them.

Kohaku was taking longer to fall asleep, even with him gently patting her to soothe into it. When her eyelids began to weigh on her at last, her hands reached up to tenderly take his. Noticing this, Hakuryuu glanced down to see his niece smiling softly. With a yawn, Kohaku mumbled, "Goodnight, _Shushu_ Ryuu...love you."

There was no hiding the smile that crept onto his lips at hearing that from the little girl. "Goodnight, Haku. Love you too."

* * *

Ceara had been looking everywhere for them. Her rest had taken longer than she expected. She thought Rei and Sei would have woken her up eventually but she didn't expect Kougyoku and Koumei to look after them so they wouldn't. In the end, she ended up sleeping through dinner. Koumei and Kougyoku saw to it that the twins ate but they hadn't heard anything from Hakuryuu or her son and daughter.

That in itself was very strange to her. With her sons asleep for the night, she asked Koumei to accompany her in her search. He gladly accepted. And thankfully, he was leveled-headed enough to ask some of the maids around if they had seen them.

"According to them, they saw Hakuryuu and Judar heading to Kohaku's and Yuu's room."

"Really?" Ceara almost wanted to slap herself. How did she not think about that earlier? This late at night, of course that's where they would be.

It took Koumei's urging for her to finally move again and head to their quarters. They reached the room quickly enough; Ceara pushed the parlor room's door open and quickly went to open the door to their room but stopped with her hand just on the door.

"Ceara?"

She didn't answer. Instead she focused on the odd noise that came from the other side. _Is that...snoring?_ Quietly, Ceara opened the door and slid it gently across just enough to take a peek inside. The mere sight beyond the door warmed her heart and made her smile. Koumei hovered over her and took a glance that made him smile as well.

Her children were safely in bed and deeply asleep. Kohaku took the middle of the grand bed with Yuu snuggling beside her and Hakuryuu to her other side with an embracing arm over the two. Judar, seemingly by the trail of flowers, had risen from the floor and taken a spot at the foot of the bed were there was plenty of space and curled up in the blanket he had, quietly snoring.

It was a heavenly scene to her. As gently and quietly as she could, Ceara closed the door behind herself. As the two of them stood there in the antechamber, she smiled up at her brother-in-law.

"I hope En and Kouha and Hakuei get to come back someday too. It'd be great for all of us to spend time together as a family."

Koumei indulged her and nodded. "After all that's happened, yes, I agree it would be." Laying a hand on her shoulder, he caught her attention. "Come, you should get as much rest as you can. Kougyoku and I will take care of Rei and Sei for the night."

Grateful for that, Ceara nodded and accompanied him out of the room and to hers. She truly had the greatest family she could have ever dreamed of.

* * *

 _ **II. Debt Repaid**_

* * *

 _Life had been fair. Maybe not as pretty or easy as others but it was ultimately fair at every turn. And as just as she'd seen it be to her, there would come a time, she thought, when she would have to repay the goodness of others with some of her own._

* * *

Parisa was five years old when she learned about magicians and magic. As a child she had seen the royal healers pass as they went about the outside courtyard of the palace picking at ingredients. Because her parents worked at the stables and kitchen, as a child, Parisa only had menial chores before she was allowed to freely play. Most of her time she spent playing with sticks or with the other servants' kids, and from time to time she also watched the royal healers of King Ceylan.

Being such a smile child had its advantages. Being able to sneak in and out of the magicians' courts and quarters without being noticed was the best one. It allowed her to freely see what extraordinary miracles they did with magic she had never seen before with her eyes. And seeing such things brought wonders to her heart and to her eyes.

It wasn't until a year later, led by curiosity and perhaps fate, that she spontaneously made her mother's favorite plant overgrow. She'd been mimicking the movements that she'd seen some of the magicians do with a mere stick she found outside her shack. And on one, the flower's single bud flourished despite winter having killed off many other plants and putting others to slumber. But it hadn't just been the one bud. The plant grew like a rampant beast until Parisa's father drew her away afraid, making her drop the stick she held in her hands. Without it, the plant stopped, leaving behind the manifestation of the miracle she'd procured.

Parisa couldn't have been happier knowing that she was able to do the fantastical things she'd seen others do. Her parents weren't. That same night during that harrowing winter, Parisa hurried alongside her parents as they whisked her away from the life she'd known in Parthevia.

As they trekked towards the ports that headed east, Parisa couldn't help but ask what was happening and why they were suddenly leaving their home. As they stowed away in one of the many cargo ships that left that night alongside a horde of other travelers, her mother held her close and spoke in quiet whispers through the night.

"We're going somewhere safe. Somewhere safe."

"Safe?" she repeated curiously yet still confused. "But why?"

"The king, his guard, they'll—"

"Julia—" Parisa and her mother both turned to her father's harsh whisper. He eyed their questionable companions for a brief moment before talking in a low voice. "Leave it be."

Her mother nodded and only held Parisa tighter . Unaware of what was really happening, Parisa held her back as her mind raced and came to one conclusion. This had all happened because of what she did. She was sure that all this had been her fault. But instead of voicing her doubts and guilt, she cuddled closer to her mother and wept the night away.

The ship carried them as far north of the eastern continent as its cargo went. It took a couple of months but by then, her parents explained to her to never again do what she'd done at home. Contrary to what she believed, magic wasn't beautiful or fantastical. It was looked down on by most of the world; this included Parthevia but they used the magicians they had for other things. Despite its connection to the rest of the world, it held its magicians at hand, taking any citizens that constituted the signs of being one. In exchange, they would recompense the families for their loss seeing as any who were taken by the royal family didn't return to their own. Magicians in Parthevia weren't allowed many liberties outside of the work they could accomplish in their royal court.

It was, as she learned years later, what their parents had escaped from. They would have rather run away from a stable home and steady food supply than give up their only child. So they fled. And as their life in the far northeastern quarters of the continent began, Parisa also learned many things about her parents as she grew older that she'd never known.

Apparently, her father was born of a nomadic tribe far in the southwestern regions of the world, close to what the world called the Dark Continent. This had been years before he met her mother in Sicilene Island back in the Reim Empire. The deserts near Cathargo had always been dangerous, he told her, but his people borne from their vast sands and harsh sun. He learned from a young age how to survive in hellish environments and was teaching her to do the same during the first months of their living in the northern plains.

Opportunity and fate brought them to the feet of a caravan that sold their goods at bazzars. They were accepted into their ranks and founded a life as merchants, something that her mother knew of having been born into a family of one. Said family though, from what Parisa knew, had disowned her after having her and marrying her father. From what she told her years later, her mother had chosen them instead of her old life and if she ever had to make the choice again, she would do the same thing.

Parisa admired and loved her parents with all her heart after having given up so much not only for each other but also for her. And as such she swore never again to use magic. Its wonder had been driven out of her by the choices it forced her family to make and it had driven her to her choice. For the good of her family and herself, she would forget all she had known about it and live life simply.

Years went by and by the time Parisa was almost twelve they had traveled through most of the northwestern half of the continent with their caravan. It was during their trek south to the capital city of trade Balbadd that they were attacked by bandits. But these weren't any normal bandits. They held odd magical artifacts with them which put aflame the caravan with their goods and comrades inside. The bandits looted as she and the rest of her family helped their friends get out before the fire reached them. Enraged despite her fear, Parisa drew the blade she carried with her and went forward to attack the distracted bandits.

She only managed to injure one before the others turned on her, disarming her and waving their weapons in her face. Instinctively, she urged herself to fight and for a brief instant her mind flashed back to her mother's plant that had grown so savagely, like a feral beast wanting to devour the world. It wasn't until she heard the screams that she opened eyes she hadn't known she'd closed and saw the bandits tangled in vicious vines. They sprouted from the hard floor and swept them up, turning them into cocoons that began to suffocate them. Fearful and grateful all the same, Parisa scooted back until she came against someone and felt her mother's arms around her, protecting her from the vicious attack. But something in Parisa told her that those plants wouldn't hurt her. She knew somewhere in her that she caused them to flourish just like she had five years ago.

Even after the last bandit's body went limp in the cocoon, none of them vanished or retreated. They merely stayed in place. The caravan managed to save most of the carriages and some of their goods. Thankfully, no one had been seriously hurt. But the chief and the others had seen what had happened and had seen what Parisa did.

Fearful again about having to leave home because of a mistake, Parisa came closer to her mother and held tightly. But instead of the lashing or anger that she always thought would come from those who found out, she found them thankful for having saved their lives. These people hadn't feared her powers. What was more, they were grateful for them and for her.

It surprised both herself and her parents to say the least. All Parisa had known about magic had been tainted black after they fled Parthevia but in these regions of the world, they seemed to be at least more accepting of it. Parisa could tell that they were still somewhat afraid of her since no one else in their caravan was known to practice magic. Nonetheless, they treated her almost as if nothing were different and she thanked god for that. It was obvious that her parents were grateful for such blessing as well.

Wonder for magic had left her once after a bad experience. Now it returned with a fervor after such a good one. As much as she hated to admit it though, it never really left. It had just festered in her, her mind wrangling it down to keep her and her family safe.

But once they reached the southern reaches of the world by the end of the year after that incident, the wonder and hunger for more knowledge about it had grown exponentially. It was around that time that they came across the borders of Magnostadt.

To say that she was enamored with the mere sight of so many magicians would be an understatement. These people were trying to enter into the country known for being one of magicians and for magicians. These were people that like her could do extraordinary things and what was more, were seeking to expand their knowledge and practice of it.

Such place to her was like a dream come true. One that she couldn't realize. She found more importance in staying with her family than anything. They raised her, saved her from enslavement to the royal family, and took care of her even now. She couldn't just leave them.

To her surprise and shock, though, they thought differently.

"...you want me...to stay…?"

Her parents smiled at her and remained outside the caravan camps to talk with her. They had just left the outskirts of Magnostadt's borders, they said, if she retraced their path, she would surely get there within the hour.

Still, their request baffled Parisa. "But why?"

Her mother gently placed a hand on her cheek and leaned forward to lay a soft kiss on her forehead. "For you, my sweet. You are who you are, and we can't change that. We don't want to. Being this—being a magician—is part of who you are. And we knew it even before we left Parthevia."

"...You knew?"

"You got this from me, Risa." Speechless at her father's declaration, she had no time to ask anything as he continued. "But I never worked on it. Where I was born, things worse than being taken by the nobility happened to people like us. So I never used it after I learned the truth. We thought we could do the same for you."

"But you're different than your father," her mother explained further. "You've never hated magic. I would always see that in those eyes of yours, so full of joy and wonder. Magic is a part of you, Parisa. And Magnostadt is the country of magicians. So if your wish is to pursue this, then go ahead. You're father and I will remain with the caravan and settle at Balbadd."

They were giving her a chance, the biggest opportunity to stop hiding and seek what she always found happiness in. They were telling her that it was okay to want what she wanted, to wish for what she wished for.

For once in a long time, Parisa couldn't keep from crying as she ran into her mother's arms. She held her tightly and felt her warmth along with her father's as he bend over to hug the two of them.

There wasn't a reason to decline. Having packed everything that belonged to her, she said her farewells hoping to one day see them again in Balbadd and left to the country of magicians.

There she spent the next four years studying and learning how to use her Life Magic. There she made friends with her fellow students and neighbors once she decided to live in the city itself after graduating. But even after graduating at fourteen, Parisa's curiosity wasn't sated. She learned about her type of magic and basics of others but she wanted to learn more. After a brief break from the school, she returned with the Chancellor's permission to study the manufacturing of magical items and, thanks to a particular professor, how world known ingredients could be used as both medicines and poisons when worked with magic.

She lasted a year in those studies before word came to her about the imminent war against the Reim Empire. All students were given the choice to either fight or leave. They wouldn't be judged whatever they chose, the teachers told them, but that those who stayed would nonetheless fight for the independence of their country were all magicians would be free.

Despite the fervency that came from the coming war, Parisa couldn't decide. She loved Magnostadt because it accepted and taught a girl like her. All the same, Magnostadt was not her country. She had no country to return to in fact. No, she thought, she had one to return to and that was simply because it was where her parents waited for her to return.

And she couldn't very well return to them dead. Choice made, she packed her things saying nothing to her friends or acquaintances. It was better that way. It seemed many of the normal folk that also lived in the city were adamant on leaving and their bodies crowded the streets of the usually peaceful districts. Parisa fought with herself to not lose patience, she would exit the city eventually, but she stumbled down when someone shoved her out of the way from behind.

The people didn't seem to care about her as she attempted several times to stand back up only to be thrown to the ground. They were more concerned with their own safety than someone else's and despite her chagrin, she couldn't blame them. It was exactly what she was doing, after all.

Adamant to try again, Parisa got to kneel before a strong hand grabbed her by her forearm and pulled her up to stand. The crowd continued to shove and pass them as she and her savior stood amidst them, but his hold didn't let their pushing bring her to the ground again.

The blond man was several feet taller than her which she guessed was because he was much older than her as well. His attire was odd, nothing she'd ever seen from Magnostadt or anywhere near their neck of the woods. His blond hair was long and plaited, the braid falling near his legs. A hood over his head made it a bit hard to make out his face but she did notice the bright amethyst eyes that stared at her before he smiled.

"You alright, missy?"

Parisa nodded and cringed at the many people that kept shoving and shouting at her to move out of the way. "Thank you."

"Don't worry." Parisa couldn't help but stare in confusion at hearing the distinct accent to his voice. The man bent down to pick up her bag with her belongings from the floor and passed it to her. "Be careful, missy. Things are getting bad here so you better be on your way home."

Nodding again, he dipped his head in a small bow before letting go of her arm and walking against the crowd. Even when people shoved him, he didn't fall. Parisa noted as she took glances behind her that the man was heading towards the school. She didn't know why but she had the feeling that she'd seen him somewhere else before. But those thoughts went away as she focused more on exiting the city.

But even as far away as she and the rest of the evacuees were, the monsters reached them and blocked their paths. People rushed in and out of the way, the violence and chaos becoming even greater now that the threat was in front of them. Unable to withstand this mayhem any longer, Parisa dropped her bag and conjured as many of the wild flora that grew around the country to wrap around the black djinn and kept them from attacking. But no matter how many she held back, they were quickly beginning to tear through the vines with their massive hands.

Before they could escape completely, though, a distinctive ringing came to her ears before the djinn visibly vibrated and exploded into masses that rained down on the crowds.

Shocked from the immense magic that had been used, Parisa looked up and saw two woman floating high above them. They weren't magicians, she could tell as much simply because they were dressed so oddly. Djinn metal vessels, her mind concocted. She'd heard about those magical items that laid in dungeons from what professor Myers had told her once. These people weren't magicians and yet they were capable of wielding powerful magic because they conquered these dungeons.

One had bloody red hair and wore white with plenty of colorful jewelry and held what looked like a sound staff in one hand. The other was decked all in white, her hair included, and she was the one that spoke loudly as the other woman held her staff over her head.

"Evacuate as fast as possible! We'll keep them at bay as long as we can!"

With that said, the white lady nodded at the redhead before flying away. The redhead, though, made sure to stay close enough to the crowd before continuing to fight. Parisa guessed in case anything else tried attacking them. And as more of those djinns drew near them, intent on the kill, she watched as the women and other metal vessel users fought in the skies over Magnostadt.

A fervent longing to fight burned in Parisa, especially as she watched that redheaded lady switch between different equips and continue fighting along her comrades. It was insane. But the desire quelled itself when she heard the voice in her head—her own mind speaking to her, she thought—speak.

" _No, Temperantia. Flee. Survive."_

All she needed was to hear those words to be reminded of why she left in the first place. Her family, she needed to return to them alive. She turned on her feet, catching her things as she ran away, and left Magnostadt to the ruins it would soon be.

The many that fled scattered at the borders of Magnostadt. Those non-magicians, sadly, trampled each other trying to escape through the narrow exits of the borders that surrounded the south of the country. Magicians like herself, though, could easily fly over the borders and continue afoot from there as many did.

She was flying over the border alongside some others when the sky darkened overhead seconds before a tremendous lightning bolt pierced the skies and fell upon Magnostadt. The moment she landed on the other side, Parisa halted like many others and watched as light gathered over the country seconds before an attack befell it. She held onto her cloak as the aftershock flew across the land. The ruckus from the people quieted right after the aftershock came but returned as their quickened steps rushed them forward. Parisa was no different. She had no idea what that had been. Frankly, though, she didn't want to know.

Parisa then continued her journey without troubles. Traveling in the numbers that headed out of the country in every direction, she stuck with the groups that headed south towards Balbadd which took about a month to reach.

The city wasn't anything like she expected but she coped by finding an inn to reside in while she searched for her parents. Even after days of that, though, things began to appear futile. Ever since Kou acquired Balbadd, things had changed. People changed. Parisa despaired thinking that maybe her parents had left Balbadd after seeing what had become of the trading capital. But despairing would get her nowhere, so instead she kept looking and hoping.

A week into her search, she had almost given up hope when she stumbled across magicians of the royal family as they scouted for new recruits. Parisa guessed that they knew about the amount of refugees that fled to Balbadd after Magnostadt, some of which were magicians. Even if they wanted to recruit for their master's vanguard as they proclaimed, she didn't think them smart for doing so seeing as those they called to arms were the same people they tried to conquer not too long ago.

But one simple prospect enticed Parisa in signing herself up to this Ren Kouha's vanguard: they could tell her if her parents were in Balbadd. So she took that chance and became one of the Imperial prince's magicians. It took her maybe another week or two to get acclimated to the environment and to the people. The newcomers were tutored on what serving entailed and Parisa found it ironic that she had come to such a position.

She ran into the very same situation that her parents had run away from the day she first used her magic. But she didn't really complain about the irony of her fate. Her superiors treated her fairly albeit a bit harsh when training; she lived through it, though, thanks to Prof. Myers being much more ruthless during her years at Magnostadt. They fed her and gave her shelter and clothes. They even paid her for her services in the military she was now a part of. Her current situation often made her wonder if this would have been how Parthevia would have treated her had she not ran away. Those thoughts quickly fled her mind though, seeing as it was ultimately useless to wonder about the 'what-ifs' of the past.

After being properly oriented and given freedom of her own, Parisa talked to one of her superiors in the vanguard and asked what she meant to with no hesitation. They had no answer but they did have a lead. The officials responsible for distributing rations would know if anybody going by the name Klados currently lived in Balbadd. Parisa found out later that there was more than one distributor; the day flew by with her going from station to station asking about her family. None in any of the districts she'd gone to so far had records of parents.

But just as she was about to give hope again, she heard a familiar voice speak very familiar names as she stood in line to ask the officials in this particular station.

"Zane and Julia Klados."

"Mom? Dad?"

The words were out of her lips before she realized she spoke them. But they'd been loud enough for the couple that took their rations to notice and turn as they left the line. Parisa wanted to cry at seeing the gentle gray eyes of her mother as they stared in shock, her hands dropping the bag they'd been given. It didn't take long before she ran up to Parisa, taking her in her arms and holding her as tightly as she could. Parisa inhaled the sweetness of her mother and choked in her tears as she hugged her back. Before long, she felt her father's strong embrace on her. Her heart soared at seeing them again, alive, after the years they'd been apart.

And she told them this and so much more when they took her to their home. The day went by with them reminiscing with each other about what had happened during their time apart. But soon they caught onto the fact that she wore colors unlike theirs. They noticed and called out the clothes she wore for what they were, the uniform of the militia under Prince Kouha's hand.

Parisa grimaced at seeing her mother gasp and sob when she confirmed their suspicions. Before she even said anything more, she laid a hand on top of her mother's and smiled.

"It's alright, mom. I made the choice to join. I did so to find you."

"But the military..." She cried, holding her sleeve against her mouth to try and quiet her sobbing. "It's not worth the risk you're putting yourself in."

"It is to me. And now I get to use what I learned in order to protect this place that took you in and more importantly you who live here." Parisa stood from her sit around the table and smiled grandly at them. "I won't die, mom. With my magic, I've learned how to heal others and even myself. All the things I've studied will be useful for me and I'll make it through. And I'll still be here, you know. I'll come visit as much as I can. I promise."

Despite her words, her mother still seemed unconvinced. Her father, though, laid a gentle hand on her mother's shoulder which caught her attention. He gave her a taut smile before facing to Parisa. "We're proud of you, Risa. And of everything you've become. I can assure you that neither your mother nor I approve of the choices you've made concerning this but we will be behind you all the same." He walked over to Parisa and kissed her head before embracing her. "So, please, stay alive."

Her tears choked her again but she managed to nod and hug him back. When her father pulled away, Parisa stood and knelt before her mother as she sobbed quietly into her sleeve. "I promise, mom, I'll come back from wherever I go."

This time it was her mother's turn to nod as she seemed unable to form coherent words. She gulped and held her face tenderly, "I love you, Parisa."

Hearing this, Parisa flung herself into her mother's arms again, burying her face against her shoulder. "I love you too, mom."

* * *

"Isn't there anybody?!"

Parisa lifted her gaze from the book she'd been reading to stare out towards the common room of their quarters. Tapping the shoulder of one of her comrades nearby, she asked what the ruckus outside was all about.

The magician shook his head, a glum expression visible on his face. "It's Lady Kohaku's vassal. She was attacked last night and the healers are having a lot of trouble finding how to cure what ails her. Some poison, I think I've heard some say."

"What poison?" Parisa asked.

He shrugged his shoulders before nodding towards the door that led to the room. "I think he wouldn't be at our doorstep asking for any help he can find if they knew."

Curious, Parisa closed her book and went to open the door that lead to the common room. There a young boy maybe a couple of years younger than her, blond and green-eyed, was vehemently arguing with one of her superiors. From what Parisa could discern, the boy was asking for help from the magicians in the vanguard. Any magician, really, that could help with the predicament of his master.

Parisa didn't know if she'd be able to help. The likelihood of that being the case was close to none. Then again, she studied many types of flora used in spells at school and she was well-versed in poisons. But it wasn't just her expertise that told her that she could help.

No, something else told her that she could help the young lady from her predicament. And although she didn't hear it in her head anymore, Parisa was almost sure that this feeling came from the voice she often heard calling her by such a weird name.

Her mind made up, Parisa stepped out into the common room catching the attention of her superior and the young boy.

"Klados, can we help you?" her superior asked.

Parisa shook her head but raised her voice to be heard clearly when she spoke. "I don't think so." She turned to face the boy that stared at her with wide eyes, concern clearly etched on his face. Pity came to her before she shook it away and stretched out her hand to him. "My name is Parisa Klados, a magician specialized in Life Magic. I was a student at Magnostadt and my field of study was spell ingredients with a focus on poisons. I think I may be of help to you."

* * *

 _ **III. Finding Beauty in the Beast**_

* * *

He'd been godsent to care for children. Even when being the youngest of the four, Sousei was great with kids. He learned much about what kids liked and didn't from his own experience and mostly how to take care of them from imitating how Ceara and Masami took care of him and Suisei. But for the love of everything that was good in the world, he couldn't get anything right with his niece and nephew that now stood awkwardly before him and Suisei.

"They really don't like us." Sousei couldn't help but sigh at finally voicing the lingering thought of his.

"What are you talking about?" Suisei asked out loud as she climbed down from his shoulder and onto the floor to take a sit. "They love us!"

"They love _you_ ," Sousei corrected, giving Sui a slight tap to her back with his foot to make her tumble forward into a ball like a pill bug. True to his statement, as soon as she was set rolling, Kohaku and Yuu ran after her cheerily. And certainly glad to be away from him.

Right now, they were babysitting for their sister. Now that her pregnancy was nearing it's end, Ceara was tired most of the time and had to rest for the majority of the day. Parisa took care of her health while Seijin worked on their conjoined job. And since Koumei was helping Kougyoku and Alibaba with the trading company, there was a need for extra hands even more. That left their sister's kids without anybody to look after them most of the times. Thankfully, someone always offered when they wanted some break from working so rigorously. Today was their day off and they thought they'd spent it with their niece and nephew whom they only met a month and a half ago.

But even after that much time, the two of them still had some trouble being near him. Obviously, they were scared because of his assimilated form. He couldn't help be equally parts sad and envious that while he looked like a big ole monster to them, which oftentimes made them cry, they were perfectly fine with Suisei who looked like more of a life-sized stuffed toy.

That and a furball for chasing around.

Said furball jumped from the floor and hit a couple of chairs before striking a pose at landing as she unfurled. Kohaku and Yuu clapped, amused by the show. Him, not so much. Sou let out another heavy sigh and gave himself space to take a sit on the floor. The sudden movement made the children wary enough to stop cheering and look at him until he stopped moving. Only then did they go on about their business with Suisei.

"What's wrong, Souchi?" Suisei asked as she jumped off the chair to walk his way. The kids followed behind her, still cautious, and stopped to keep themselves a few paces away from him.

"If you haven't noticed, Sui, they're scared of me."

"They are?" Her ears twitched a bit as her head tilted before she looked back to the kids and repeated the question. "You guys scared of _Shushu_ Sou?"

Kohaku nodded as she and Yuu held onto one another's arm. It was little Yuu that said it aloud, though. "Big, scary _shushu_."

That he said it didn't help him feel any better about it. "See? They think I'm scary."

"What about him is scary?" Sui came closer to the kids which gave away how she was only a couple of heads taller than them.

"Horns?" Kohaku said that as if she didn't exactly know what to name first, motioning to her own head in the shape of his horns.

"Horns?" Suisei repeated curiously. A grin came to her before she traipsed through the furniture to jump onto his shoulder and climb onto his head. "But look," she replied while toying with them and twirling his hair around the ivory to mask them. "You can hang stuff on it. Don't you think some pretty ornaments would make him look pretty?"

Despite their previous fear, Suisei's comment made them giggle. Sousei didn't appreciate her making fun of him, though. He already had a hard time accepting the form he took after a while of having it and this wasn't helping his self-esteem.

 _Wait a minute._

They were laughing. Perhaps at him, but this was the first time they were looking at him without terror in their eyes or them backing away.

" _ **Keep going, Suichi. They seem to like that."**_

Suisei glanced down with a mischievous glint in her eye that he definitely didn't like. _**"You want them to laugh at you?"**_

" _ **If it helps them get comfortable with me then to hell with it. Go crazy."**_

"Hey, guys!" Suisei announced rather loudly which hurt his sensitive ears. "What else do you think we could make prettier for _Shushu_ Souchi?"

"His claws!" Kohaku said, pointing to them.

Sousei consciously stared down at them and frowned.

"His hair!" Yuu offered.

"And he's too tall!"

Okay, they were just nitpicking now. But with how they kept pointing out thing after thing, he couldn't help but feel like they were actually looking at him for once. So instead of protesting when Suisei began to have really bad ideas as to how to 'make him prettier,' Sousei let them play with him as they wished.

Surely it wouldn't be so bad.

* * *

"I love you. I really do. But by the gods do you look awful."

Sousei tried his hardest not to reply to Parisa's remark. But when Seijin couldn't keep his laughter in any longer, he blew a gasket. "I want to see you deal with them then!" he cried out but refrained from moving as Kohaku was still not done doing his hair. He'd already made that mistake and it ended up with her pulling it by accident.

" _Shushu_ Sou looks pretty!" Kohaku corrected from behind him.

"Yeah, pretty," Yuu agreed as he stood on a chair to hand paper ornaments they've made and cut out to hang on his horns.

"So true." Sousei clearly heard the chortled Suisei tried hiding as she continued to paint his claws with some polish she'd borrowed from Kougyoku. "We're helping Sou find his feminine side, Risa-chan."

At that the three of them finally let out the laugh they were holding back loudly enough to make his ears hurt again. Kohaku and Yuu didn't mind the loudness and instead focused on their task. Honestly, though, even with how flustered he was of his friend, sister, and girlfriend mercilessly driving him through the mud because of this fiasco, Sousei couldn't be happier that his niece and nephew were being more receptive of him.

And he really, really tried keeping that very close to heart when Seijin and Parisa offered to help them. Sousei protested vehemently against this but when Kohaku and Yuu got so excited about the extra hands to help, he couldn't deny them. In the end, they lasted an extra hour and by then they had completely changed his attire along with everything else.

His hair was braided—what was with these kids and braiding?—and adorned with ribbons of white and gold that were entwined between the folds of the plait. Drawn decorations hung from his horns by small metal sticks Sui procured and bent into hooks; the tips of the horns were also painted the same bright gold as his nails. Thanks to Parisa and Seijin, his attire had also changed into some more colorful, not to say expensive, clothing. Silks always were a staple in the east—what with the rise of the empire booming that demand—and that made up the whole of his clothes. They got the longest white robe they could find and it managed to fit him just right. They also came up with a makeshift sash of red and gold from another set that Parisa brought for them. Instead of normal slacks, they simply told him to wrap a dark ivory silk around his hips and tie it with a gold sash.

The whole crowd that had a hand in the fiasco stood before him, contemplating their masterpiece.

Parisa was the first one to comment. "You know," she began, pointing a slim finger his way, "it's not half bad now that it's done. It actually looks, dare I say it, good. Well, your horn ornaments aside, that is."

"Don't joke, Risa," Sousei pled as he reached over his shoulder to grab his braided hair. In actuality, that was the only thing he liked about it. Ever since his assimilation, he had trouble thinking of how to deal with so much hair, especially when no matter how he cut it, it would almost instantly grow back within a day or two.

At that, she shook her head. "That's the thing, I'm not."

"I agree," Suisei added as she sat on Seijin's shoulders, her hands crossed on the top of his head as she laid her chin on them to watch him. "It's even cool!"

"At least we finally found clothes your size," Seijin reminded.

"I guess." Sousei's misery got cut short when a pair of hands yanked at the sash around his hips. This made him bend low enough to meet two pairs of bright blue eyes like his that gawked at him.

First Kohaku pursed her lips as if contemplating something. Sousei had some idea about what it was she couldn't keep out of her mind. Deciding to hunch down instead of keeping such uncomfortable position, he smiled at her while eyeing both of them.

"Still look scary?"

Kohaku couldn't seem able to keep from nodding. The grip on his sash, though, didn't leave. "You look scary and mean. But...you're not mean."

"Not scary too," Yuu added as he also held tightly to his sash as well as his sister's hand.

"Then what am I?" Sousei asked curiously.

Kohaku thought a bit about it before letting a little smile crawl to her lips, and though her lips were quivering a bit, Sousei could tell that it was genuine. " _Shushu_ Souchi."

"Yeah, _Shushu_ Souchi."

That certainly brought a smile to his face and joy to his heart. At least they were trying. He placed his hands before the two, opening up his palms to show them before asking, "It's almost lunchtime. How about we go get your mom some food and take it to her as a surprise."

"Surprise mama!" Yuu cheered, jumping up and down as he let go of Kohaku and his sash.

"Yeah," Kohaku agreed with a nod. An idea appeared to come to her as she gasped and tugged at Sousei's sash to call his attention again. "Mama really likes peaches. And she likes fish with lemon and spices."

"Lots of spices," Yuu enthusiastically pointed out.

"Then how does steamed fish, rice, and vegetables for dinner with peach tart for dessert sound?"

"Peach tart!" the two shouted, very clearly liking the idea.

"I guess we need to go ahead and tell this to the kitchen staff then." Seijin patted Suisei's head, asking her if she would stay up there and go with them. She liked getting free rides on whomever could carry her, so if she was going to go anywhere it'd be on someone's shoulder. Seijin and her went on ahead while Parisa stayed behind to help Sou with the kids.

Kohaku and Yuu walked a few paces ahead following after Seijin and Suisei since they wanted to 'lead' their uncle and big sister Parisa. Sousei let them and simply watched from his spot behind them as the two marched on hand in hand.

Sousei heard Parisa breath in a second before she spoke, "They're adorable."

"They are."

"And it's nice that they're getting used to you albeit after some beautification."

"Small price to pay to get them comfortable."

"I want some."

Sousei almost choked on his own spit as his breath hitched. Despite how sudden and out of the blue the subject turned out, Sousei had to ask. "Want some what?"

"Kids," she offered perkily. She paused and placed her index finger on her cheek pensively. "Yours, of course. Well, they'd be ours but you know what I mean. Wouldn't you?"

"Well...yeah, of course but we're barely going to get married. So let's take things a step at a time, why don't we?" He chuckled but the morbidity of the thoughts that came to him brought a shade of solemnity to his mood. "Besides, I don't know how safe it is for me to be intimate with you."

"What do you mean?" she inquired seemingly curious.

"Well..." Where did he start? The fact that he still had trouble controlling his strength in this new body even after three years with it? Or what of his really bad insecurity problems. But when he voiced what troubled him, Parisa giggled. That certainly wasn't assuring to him.

Thankfully, she clarified quickly thereafter, linking her arm and his and coming close before slightly jumping with her step until she reached his cheek to give it a chaste kiss. Amazed and more than pleased with the gesture, Sousei touched his cheek in slight disbelief before glancing down at his fiance who merely smiled up at him.

"Whatever it may be, I'm sure it's just you being a worrywart. I don't care about how you are now or how you used to be. All I care about is you, Sou. I think that's enough to trump any uncertainty or worry you have." She patted his arm affectionately, before the smile turned into a grin. "So rest assured, darling. We're good."

The hearty laugh that he let out made the toddlers in front of them glance over their shoulders back at them. Sousei let them be—though he heard the giggles that came from them— and instead laid a kiss to the top of Parisa's head.

"We definitely are."

* * *

 _ **IV. What Goes Bump in the Night**_

* * *

Flames were spurring everywhere she looked. Her feet, bare after having lost her slippers, burned and ached from running. It hurt to breath. It was hard to think. But there was no time to stop.

She couldn't stop.

The flourishing determination made her grasp onto the hand she held behind her. Her large blue eyes kept glancing back and forth between the inferno in front of her and who she dragged behind her. In one of those times she glanced back, a tumultuous noise caught her attention to her front a second before the ceiling ahead of them collapsed under the increasing pressure of the fires.

In that brief moment that they stopped, she felt the tight grasp on her arm as Kohaku's hand latched onto her tighter, crying out her fears. Ceara didn't have that luxury. Only a couple breaths with residue of smoke was all she could afford before turning on her feet to head another way.

One of them had to be clear. One of them had to lead outside.

She would find it. She would lead her out if it was the last thing she did. She wouldn't let Kohaku die.

* * *

Despite how hard she tried, Ceara couldn't keep her head from lolling back and forward. She was too tired after not being able to sleep. Nightmares plagued her. And restless nights were common, already. But with so many piling up, she was finally feeling their toll. And a particular one took ahold of her mind most nights.

The fire that had just happened three weeks ago. Two weeks ago they arrived at the Imperial Palace in Rakushou. Three days ago, they celebrated Kohaku's birthday. And three days ago, Prince Hakuyuu found out her dreaded secret. She hadn't spoken with him ever since then. Didn't have a chance to. Maybe the fear that he would really tell on her was weighing on her mind more so than before. Maybe those nightmares came from that as well. But he promised he wouldn't. He promised they'd find a way to make things better.

Although, she couldn't begin to imagine how.

"Do you feel alright, Kohaku?"

It took Ceara a split second to react to the name, but the need to didn't really seem to matter. Masami held up her hand and placed it under her bangs and over her forehead. "You're not feverish. Have you not slept well?"

"N-No," she stuttered back but kept it quiet with her head down as she stared at her barely touched breakfast. Letting go of her utensils, she rubbed at her eyes and gave Masami the best smile she could muster. "B-But it's okay. I'll be fine."

It fooled her for about a second. "Are you sure? Maybe you should rest. We can postpone the outing, you know."

Ceara jumped from her sit at the table as she faced Masami. "No, don't!" The moment the words left her, though, she realized how loud and how much of a disturbance she'd turned into. Especially with General Koujiro and Lady Arianna present. Sousei and Suisei, barely of age six, didn't seem to care much about her outburst and glamorized it as they repeated her words while shooting their arms out above their heads.

More than a bit embarrassed, Ceara tried ameliorating the situation by slowly sitting back down and apologizing outloud. She really needed to get used to this.

"Now, Kohaku, stop being so crass," Lady Arianna reminded her as she gave the twins a couple of napkins to clean themselves as they ate. Daintily but not as discreetly as she thought, Ceara watched as Lady Arianna picked her cup to drink, one she knew was full with wine. Ceara couldn't see how she could drink this early. "It's not becoming of a young lady."

"Yes, L—mother!" That she raised her voice at almost slipping didn't help her case. Ceara apologized again and this time decided to just nod or shake her head if spoken to.

"Mother, Father," Masami called out as she laid her hand on Ceara's back, "maybe today isn't such a good day to go outside. Kohaku doesn't seem to be feeling too well."

"Nonsense." General Kourijo's loud and stern voice made both of them flinch. Ceara felt Masami's hand on her back freeze in place but her hold was just as tight as before. "His majesty has made the time to join. Neither of you will shame me by making up excuses. You will attend and that's the end of it."

Ceara didn't reply which left Masami to answer for the both of them. "Yes, father."

It wasn't like she wanted the gathering to be cancelled, either. Far from it since with this she would be able to finally see and maybe even speak with Hakuyuu far from prying ears. At least as far as she was concerned anyway.

The outing was more of an excuse for two friends now separated by class and positions to talk, she came to notice once the families came together near the outside gardens. Lady Arianna and Empress Gyokuen stayed behind, enjoying themselves better by talking and and drinking tea indoors. General Koujiro and Emperor Hakutoku alongside his brother spent the time together the same way but out in the open, talking and drinking...liquor.

Thankfully, Prince Hakuyuu, Hakuren, and Masami had the heart to lead them away from that. Instead the lot of them—the two crown princes, along with Hakuei and Hakuryuu, Masami, the twins, and the oldest nephews of the emperor—spent the time playing around.

As tired as Ceara was, hide and seek was all she could muster to do. Thankfully, the way the twins played it, they would get tired of waiting for her to find them and instead sneak up on her to tackle her to the ground, preferably face first.

Hakuryuu didn't like playing like that but Hakuei calmed him down pretty quickly before going to help Ceara up for the fifth time from the ground.

"Are you alright?" she asked helping her dust herself off.

Ceara nodded with a small, reassuring smile before turning to the twins with fake anger. "You two need to learn how to play!"

"Haku-nee is too slow!" they cried out in unison. "We'll look!"

"I-I don't want them to look for us," Hakuryuu whimpered, obviously scared about being slammed face first onto the ground.

Ceara couldn't blame him. The two devils had already scratched her up pretty good. So she agreed to let them look instead if they promised not to tackle anymore. They took a brief glance at each other before looking back at Hakuryuu who flinched at the mischievous glint in their eyes. Grabbing onto one another's hands, Sou and Sui smirked before raising their free hands above their heads and calling out, "We promise!"

"It'll be okay, Hakuryuu," Hakuei told him with a pat to the head.

"Yeah," Ceara assured him. "They promised they wouldn't do that and I believe them. So let's play, okay?"

"You bunch playing hide-and-seek?"

"May we join?"

The faces of both the princess and the little prince brightened up as they turned to see their brothers approaching. "Yuu-nii, Ren-nii!"

"Are you going to play with us?" Hakuei asked.

"Sure, why not?" Hakuren cheered as he squatted down before them to bring them closer to him in a hug.

Ceara smiled, happy that at least Hakuryuu wasn't crying anymore. As she glanced about though, Hakuyuu's eyes caught hers in a deadlock. Panicked for some reason, she averted her eyes to her feet and simply overhead as Hakuyuu called Kouen and Koumei over. She glanced up through her eyelashes to watch as Kouen dragged his little brother to them, the younger redhead boy seemingly just as sleepy as she was.

"Want to play with us?"

"I would rather not, your highness," Kouen replied. Ceara found it strange that he was so courteous. Even if he was the First Prince, the guy was still his cousin.

"Whatcha say, Mei?" Hakuren asked coming around from his siblings and picking up the teen in his arms. Lazily, Koumei didn't seem bothered. Actually, he seemed quite used to being wrangled like Hakuren was doing.

"I'd rather sleep, in all honesty." As if to emphasize his point, a yawn escaped him, one that caught Ceara and made her yawn as well.

"No sleep for you!"

"Ah!" Ceara couldn't help screeching as a heavy weight jumped onto her back with enough force to push her face first onto the ground again. Lifting her face and spitting out dirt, she finally had enough and cried out, "Why me!?"

"Haku-nee falls over easier!" Sousei cheered as he patted her back.

Suisei was the one to point at Hakuryuu with that same glint on her eyes. "But Ryuu-crybaby falls best!" At that, Hakuryuu flinched and held onto Hakuyuu who was nearest to him, and Sui clearly saw this. "Ah, he moved!"

"Get him!" Sousei hollered. At being called to rally, the twins jumped off their sister fully intent on tackling down the fourth prince. Ceara struggled to get on her feet to stop them but before they even got halfway there, Masami caught them both with an arm around their waists.

Sousei struggled to get her grip off while Suisei struggled to keep her head up from dangling with how she was being held. "You two need to learn manners." Bringing them and herself over to Ceara, she bent down before her. "Are you okay?"

"After five times of that, you get used to it." Ceara excused herself for a second as she spat out dirt and cleaned her tongue with any part of her clothes that wasn't dirty. Overhearing the clamoring from the twins, Ceara pointed out what she had promised before, "They want to seek."

Masami wasn't having any of that. "Not with the way you two are playing, you aren't." The twins protested loudly at that, wanting the liberty to play however they wanted. "No rough housing. You can't be like that to Prince Hakuryuu."

"Hey, what about me?" Ceara asked.

Masami chuckled. "You said you got used to it, right?"

 _Not funny._ But Ceara knew that Masami meant that for everybody. The twins were pretty rough kids for being six. They thought themselves invincible. They liked being strong. And for some reason, that meant often teasing Hakuryuu who they thought of as a crybaby. Ceara could see why too but that didn't condone their poor behavior.

But they couldn't just make them. They were kids, after all. Brats much like she remembered herself being with Cael. Having that in mind, Ceara gave herself a minute to think.

 _A way to make them behave. How do I convince—_

Bingo.

"If you don't hurt anybody for the rest of the day, I'll make you almond cookies!"

As if turned off, the twins stopped struggling in Masami's arms and contorted themselves to be able to look at her; Suisei let herself fall and glance back at Ceara with her head upside down while Sousei tried his best to glance over Masami's arm.

"You promise?" they asked together.

"Only if you promise me you won't tackle anybody—including me!" She sternly added that last part just to make sure she made herself clear.

The two went back and spoke to each other. From what Ceara heard, it wasn't anything anybody would understand. It was that language of theirs. One no one understood. But they finished talking quickly and turned back to Ceara.

"We promise, Haku-nee!"

It was easier after that to convince Masami to let them play together with them. With that settled, Prince Hakuyuu found it best to make teams. Since many of them were children, Ceara thought it sensible.

Masami would stay with Sou and Sui to help them look, and make sure they kept their promise and not get into any more trouble. Hakuei would hide with Hakuryuu, Kouen with Koumei, and Hakuren alone, which took Ceara by surprise until Hakuyuu came close to her and took her hand in his.

"Let's go hide."

Before she could get over the babbling mess she was and protest, Hakuyuu whisked her away farther and farther until she could barely hear the twins' loud counting that Masami corrected when they messed up. Hakuyuu found them a good hiding spot near the back of the buildings near the woods. It was ways away from where staff usually roamed. No one would find them unless they were looking for them.

"Looks like the coast is clear," he said in a small whisper that Ceara clearly heard along with her own racing heart that thumped in her ear. Turning to her, she stiffened for a second until he smiled and scooted closer to her. "Masami seems worried about you. Is there a reason in particular?"

The thought of not answering him was heavy on her mind but when he only looked at her so familiarly and lovingly, she couldn't help but reply. Even if it only came out as a mumble as she hid her face in her hands and knees. "I'm having trouble sleeping."

"Nightmares?" Ceara nodded. "I see. Things will be very hard for awhile. A long, long while, in fact."

"Will I sleep again?" She realized how childish the question was once she spoke it, but he didn't seem to think of it as such as he gave it a long thought.

"It'll take awhile and a lot of talking through things. But mostly time. And I can't really assure you that the nightmares will stop fully. They may go away for sometime but they may come back."

"I don't like that," she confessed.

"I know. I don't like how it works, either." Ceara didn't move when she felt Hakuyuu's hand lay on her head, stroking her hair soothingly. The gesture calmed her somewhat from the reminder of those nightmares. "But things are what they are. And first of all, we need to take care of you."

"Me?"

"Yes. Nothing of what we may or may not do will matter if you cannot live through this first. You're just a child."

"I'm older than Hakuei, though."

"Eleven is still a kid," he replied, wanting to get his point across. "And you can't just deal with this alone. I thought we talked about this."

"It's kinda hard not to think about it like that."

"Well, we'll work on it. You have a long trek ahead of you, after all. But you won't go at it along. I'll be with you. As will be that djinn of yours."

"Murmur?" she provided as her hands reached up to touch the carnation hairpin that stuck out from her bun.

"Yes." Hakuyuu sat back as he lifted his hand from her head. "From what Kouen tells me, djinn, or at least his, are quite humane. They chose you as kings and bestowed you with great power because they saw something in you that they believe warranted it. But with that power comes great responsibility, like this one you've incurred. But it's not impossible to bear. Not when you have help."

Ceara didn't know what to say. Prince Hakuyuu was proving to be the best ally she ever could have found in her situation. As things stood, she was really starting to think that things could get better.

"Koh—mm."

That pause made her blink owlishly at him, curious. "What's wrong?"

"Calling you Kohaku seems a tad bit morbid, not to mention disrespectful to her. But I can't very well call you Ceara, either."

That's right. Him knowing meant that things would be different between the times they interacted in public to when they did so in a private one-on-one setting like this. "Well...what about Speirr?"

"Speirr?"

Ceara nodded. "It was my mother's name. And it's a variant of mine. Cael called me that a lot and it sort of became like another name for me. Nobody knew about it at the estate though. And if anybody asks we can just say it's an endearment or something."

"Alright, then let's try our best from now on, Speirr—" Ceara got a bit panicked when Hakuyuu's demeanor suddenly turned serious, a far cry from the gentle man she was talking to seconds ago. Before she could even ask what the matter was, Hakuyuu glanced over his shoulder a second before he panicked while all the same letting out a chuckle, "R-Run!"

Scared but knowing that he wouldn't laugh if it was serious, she followed after him and heard the laughter of the twins as they were quickly gaining on her as she fell behind. Hakuyuu fell the steps back to pick her up and run away towards the tree they were using as a safe base. Because of his quick feet, and the fact that she didn't drag him down, both of them ended up being safe from Sou's and Sui's attack which made them quite cranky.

And as Hakuyuu chuckled from their reaction, Ceara found it in herself to crack a smile, one that she felt genuine. This man was helping her so much, trying his hardest to do so, and everything for a stranger like her. A murderer nonetheless. But he saw past that—what exactly did he see, she didn't think she would ever know.

But as the day dragged on and they continued to play more and more, not just that game but others as well, Ceara found the sky darkening quickly as dusk began to fade just as they were playing the last round of hide-and-seek again. This time, it was Hakuryuu and Hakuyuu seeking. Hakuei went with Hakuren and the rest of the groups stayed. She wanted to go alone, wanting to give the little prince more of a challenge.

And she decided that the back spot where she and Hakuyuu used that afternoon would do the trick. As she waited by herself, dusk finally fell and darkened the skies and her surroundings. Overhead, she could hear the excited cries of people as they were getting found one by one. After some moments of silence, Ceara assumed herself to be the last to be found so she did her best to stay silent and concentrate on listening for Hakuryuu or Hakuyuu.

But as the silence surrounded her, something disturbed it. It was faint but she heard it. Something that wasn't either of the princes. Something that seemed to be coming from the nearby woods just outside of the palace. Curious, Ceara got on all fours and made her way as quietly as she possibly could.

 _There's...something there._

"Kohaku one-san!"

Ceara couldn't keep the scream that came out when Hakuryuu's hands caught her by her legs. In a panic, she kicked but thankfully she didn't hurt him and he didn't really notice her freaking out. Sitting up, she took a few deep breaths as Hakuryuu hugged her.

"Caught you!"

She chuckle for a second, her head turning behind her shoulder to see that there wasn't anything between the trees. Whatever she had seen wasn't there anymore.

 _Did I imagine it?"_

"Thought you'd be here." At hearing Hakuyuu's voice, a lot of the panic from before dissipated as she struggled a bit to stand back up while holding Hakuryuu in her arms.

"Y-Yeah." She hugged Hakuryuu back, making the boy giggle, before putting him down and patting his head. "Good job, little dragonet. You found me!"

"You were the last too! And I found everybody else!" he exclaimed.

"Really?" she asked, exaggerating her amazement a little. "That's great! You know, that means you won this time!"

The little prince cheered and laughed with Ceara joining him. Hakuyuu chuckled a bit before motioning for the two of them to return to his side. "Come on, you two. Let's go get the others. It's dark out and I'm sure dinner is going to be served soon."

"Yes!" the two of them chorused, walking hand in hand towards Hakuyuu.

* * *

Fire. Nothing but the flurry of flames remained in her eyes as once again Ceara awoke that same day in the middle of the night. Covered in cold sweat and breathing shallowly, she huddled her blankets closer and sat back against the wall.

" _Little one, takes deep breaths."_

Ceara listened to Murmur's simple instructions and managed to calm her racing heartbeat. But the image had been vividly burned into her mind and she doubted she'd be able to sleep for the rest of the night. Even when Murmur urged her to try, she knew better than to do so. She didn't want to see fire anymore.

Really, a part of her swore she could still smell the horrid stench of burning skin, flaming wood, and ash as if it clung on her. Could still hear the crackling of the fire, the estate falling apart, and Kohaku's scream of caution.

One that came late to her ears. One that prompted Kohaku to act and push her aside to avoid an attack of one of Murmur's soldiers. One that took her away from Ceara.

"...I'm sorry."

" _S_ _ **o**_ **r** r _y_ _ **?"**_

The grotesque sound that she barely heard sent a chill down her spine. Her head snapped up from hiding in her hands and scanned her room, her eyes straining the most they could to search the whole of that room in the dark. But no matter where she looked, there was nothing there.

 _I...I imagined it._

She must have. There was no way—but the chuckle that echoed in the room told her otherwise. Something— _someone—_ was in there with her. And she couldn't see where.

Then it laughed again. And this time when it spoke, it was right beside her. And she felt them _breathing._

" **S** _o_ _ **r**_ _r_ y _w_ _ **o**_ n **'t** **cu** _t_ **i** _ **t.**_ **"**

Ceara couldn't help herself then and let out the most ear piercing scream her lungs could muster.

* * *

Nothing. No sign or trace of her.

 _Where'd you run off to Ceara?_

Hakuyuu had no answer to that question. Nor to the other pressing matter that came to his mind as the palace searched for her: what the hell had made her scream bloody murder so loud that it woke up those nearest to her quarters?

There wasn't any time to ponder that when he saw his brother running his way. "Anything?"

Ren shook his head, worry etched on his face that was surely enough for both of them. "She's not in any of the Eastern rooms."

Masami ran their way having just turned a corner, panting as she got to them. "S-She's not in the kitchen or servant quarters either. Father is searching the barracks and mother and the empress went to the priesthood to search as well. Y-Your highness, w-we have to find her. Haku—something scared her so badly."

"I know." As he said this, he held her at arm's length, his hands on her shoulders, as he addressed her clearly. "We'll find her, Masami."

"Your highness!" Kouen's voice, loud as it was, reached him before he even turned the corner. Koumei was hot on his heels despite still being disheveled from his sleep, his eyes wide from the panic that was spreading. "Koumei saw her!"

"Where Mei?" Ren asked quickly just as their cousins reached them.

"Towards the outside gardens," he panted, somewhat out of breath, and pointed in the general direction. "S-Somebody—she was running away from somebody but I couldn't see them well."

"Where did it look she was headed, Koumei?" Hakuyuu inquired, wanting a clear answer.

"Outside, towards the woods."

Damn. "Ren, take Masami and Koumei. Inform the rest of the search parties about this. Kouen, come with me." They all followed his stern but calm orders and the two of them sprinted out towards the outer gardens and to the only path that she would've known to take to reach the woods, the same hiding place from before.

He and Kouen ran through the woods, keeping their ears open and swords at the ready in case they caught anything.

"Come out, come out~" The sound of another's voice stopped the two in their tracks. It was loud enough to reach them but it still sounded far away. It was a man. "Come out, girly. I caught a very, very bad girl by the toe, didn't I? Come out and play with me~"

"Prince Hakuyuu," Kouen eyed their left side, "it's coming from over there."

"Let's g—"

But there wasn't a need for the order. They sprinted out towards the source of the voice the instant they heard Ceara's cry quickly followed by the man's loud voice calling her a bitch. It didn't take them long to reach the man that was dragging his foot along which had been badly injured from something.

The instant the two reached him, they raised their swords and Hakuyuu promptly spoke first. "Stay where you are."

But they didn't. Instead, the man turned about, twisting his already bloody and protruding ankle as he did so. The manic look on his eyes told Hakuyuu right away that the man was gone, high with some kind of drug more than likely. That was the only thing he could think of that would explain him still grinning wildly from ear to ear when two men held swords to him.

It was only after repeating and telling the man to show them his hands that he let go of his injured leg and raised them. But he didn't stay quiet.

"Look, girly~ You've got brave knights coming to your rescue! How about coming down to greet them? Will you play then?"

"Shut up," Kouen shouted at him before taking a step forward. Hakuyuu tried stopping him but the man seemed to only need that tiny bit show of aggression to react. And he did so violently as he turned and began bashing the tree behind him with his fists over and over again, calling to the 'girly.' Having had enough of the bastard, Hakuyuu took the initiative and reach him to knock him out with a bash to the back of the head. In an instant, his rambles ended and only echoed in the empty woods.

"C—" Hakuyuu was quick to hold his tongue. No matter how worried he was, he couldn't let the name slip from him in front of Kouen. So instead, he called another. One he knew she'd answer to. "Speirr? Where are you?"

"O-Over here."

Her tiny voice reached them and got them to face upwards towards the tree that the man had been banging on. In the dark, Hakuyuu could make out her silhouette several feet higher than him. She'd climbed up to get away.

"Goodness, are you alright? Can you get down?"

"I-I can't. It hurts."

"...hurts?"

"Your highness." Hakuyuu turned at Kouen's call and watched as his cousin brought a hand out near the tree only to have something drip on it several times from above. Touching it, Hakuyuu noted the thickness and warmth. "It's blood."

 _She's injured._

"Can you climb, En?"

"Me?" he asked, a bit incredulous.

"We don't know how badly she's injured. It'll be easier for you to climb and pass her down to me once you get low enough." Kouen looked down for a bit but quickly acceded, leaving his sword behind to climb.

* * *

Kouen had to admit that the girl had gone quite far up the tree. Injured however she may be, to have escaped from the man that had been pursuing her by climbing one must have been hard. Hard but smart.

Reaching the dark silhouette that Prince Hakuyuu indicated from below ground, Kouen let his eyes adjust until they found her clear figure. She was utterly shaken, holding for dear life onto her leg with one hand while grasping something tightly to her chest.

Setting himself close to the sturdy branch she sat on, Kouen reached out his hand to grab her but she recoiled backwards against the tree trunk almost instantly.

"I need to bring you down."

"I can't move. My leg—"

"Show me."

Her eyes darted to his when he said this and stopped for a brief moment before pursing her lips and reaching down to the hem of her skirts. It was as she began to lift it that Kouen's eyes noticed it was torn apart, and tearing further until she lifted the skirts above something. It wasn't until she uncovered herself as much that he saw the glint of a blade coming from her thigh, very close to her knee. It was a very small dagger but considering she wasn't that big to being with, it was enough to remain lodged there. Her leg was stained with blood as it ran along, dripping at the end of her bare and dirty foot.

 _She's still losing blood._

Without speaking, he reached again and she recoiled like before, this time hurting herself at bringing her injured leg back and crying out.

"Kouen? What's the matter?"

"I need to give her some treatment," he declared before turning to face her. Sternly but as calmly as he could, he repeated that to her. "I need to treat you. You're losing blood."

"W-What are you going to do?" she asked, scared.

The question got him to grimace. It wouldn't be pretty. "I need to take the dagger out and bandage you up." As he explained that to her, he quickly undid the sash around his waist and ripped it in half with his teeth. Knowing she would only flinch back if he didn't, Kouen kept talking to her as he worked. "I need to tie this above the wound. Can you lift your leg?"

"N-Not much—" she groaned as she tried doing as he said, even using her one free hand to prop it up.

"That's good enough," he muttered. Quickly as he could, he tied a makeshift tourniquet above the dagger. She didn't say a word but he could hear soft whimpers up until she lowered it.

"Now what?" she asked, her voice a bit shaky. He guessed she pretty much anticipated what it'd be.

"I take the dagger out." Instantly, he saw how her eyes widened and he shook his head while preparing the other hand with one half of his sash. Knowing it'd be better for her to be distracted for it, he told her that he needed her sash as well. And while she was busy doing that, Kouen took the chance to yank the thing out to quickly press down on it with the half he had in his hand.

The cry he anticipated left her loudly. What he didn't expect was her fists thrumming down on him as she called him names, "You jerk! Bastard! That hurt! You should've told me!"

"It's out, isn't it?" he back talked but mostly ignored her and merely swept her hands aside as he took her sash. "Press this down." She placed her hands over his with a whimper and sniffles, but he clicked his tongue at how weakly she held onto it. "Hard."

"It hurts."

"Do it." In the end, she did and Kouen took that time to wrap the sash around the wound, tell her to take her hand away, and tie it down hard enough to the point she whimpered. "There. It'll do until we get back. Now, here, hold on," he instructed as he scooted closer to get her to wrap her arms around his neck. Since he needed both hands free, he told her to hold onto his waist as well as she could with her legs. She quietly complied and held on tighter. Thankfully, it lasted until he reached to where Prince Hakuyuu still stood and where he helped him get down from the tree with the kid still holding onto him, more easily now that he could properly hold her.

"Speirr, are you alright?" Hakuyuu asked, bending down to their height and brushing hair away from her face that was so close to his.

She nodded but whimpered when Kouen moved slightly to adjust her in his arms. "I-It's just my leg. But I'm okay."

"Let's get you home then. That needs to be treated pro—"

Kouen's blood ran cold for a second as a guttural cackle ran through the air very close to them. He felt the grip around his neck tightened too. Kohaku stiffened in his arms as she turned to face the man that laid on the ground a few feet away from them. Following her line of sight, Kouen and Prince Hakuyuu watched as the man they'd thought unconscious lifted his head, cackling all the while as his eyes landed upon him and Kohaku.

 _No, he's looking at her._

"No fun, Speirr. You're no fun! Play some more~ Play!" He cackled more, louder, and kept repeating that over and over. Kohaku whimpered and hid her face away against his shoulder.

"Take her back, Kouen. She needs to be treated."

The order surprised him. "But your highness—"

"Go," he commanded.

Kouen didn't want to leave him but he was given an order too. So he mumbled a quiet 'hold on' to Kohaku before jogging off, heading back to the palace. But as quiet as the woods were he, and surely Kohaku too, heard the guttural voice cry out and drown before it completely stopped.

"You think Hakuyuu…ki—"

"I'm sure he did what he knew to be necessary."

She only hummed her agreement and that was the last thing she said to him before they reached the palace. The Reizei quickly came to take their daughter which they hurried off treat. Prince Hakuren was the one to ask about his brother, and just as he was about to say something, he felt a hand on his shoulder that stopped him. Looking over his shoulder, Kouen couldn't discern anything from the aloof expression on Prince Hakuyuu's face. But it didn't last long. Soon enough, he smiled down on him and Koumei.

"You two go rest. It's been a long night."

"Y-Yes," he replied quietly. He tapped Koumei who followed after him, but Kouen kept glancing back only watching Prince Hakuren's face as Prince Hakuyuu told him something he couldn't hear. But by the sudden seriousness that came over his face, ir told him enough.

Kohaku had the right idea. Surely, the man that chased her out into the woods wouldn't bother them anymore.

 _Thank god._

"Oni-sama?" Koumei's quiet voice brought him back to the present. Kouen watched his little brother's eyes a bit wide and confused at the arm that he'd wrapped around his shoulders to keep him close.

"Let me take you to your room." Koumei blinked a couple of times but nodded languidly, letting himself be guided off by Kouen.

* * *

Masami couldn't understand from where they had snuck in. Even with the morning light of the day after what had happened, she couldn't find a trace of any forced entry to her sister's room.

Poor thing was still shaken and she couldn't blame her. Kohaku had stayed all night with her and the twins but she had barely slept anything. Aside from her wound, Masami doubted she would be able to after the horrible experience. Too bad that the bastard didn't live to get tortured. He deserved that after what he did to her little Haku.

What she wanted to know now was how the bastard managed to get in her room. But no matter where she looked, nothing was amiss. It was like the man hadn't even been there. Tired of looking, she sat on the bed's edge for a second but in the silence heard something...squirming...under the bed?

 _What?_

Coming down, she lifted the covers that blocked the underneath and saw nothing but darkness there. Instinctively, she reached inside wanting to see what was making that noise she kept hearing. Her arm was stretched out as far as it went reaching almost the middle of the bed when she felt it.

Something...small and squi—

"Ow!" Her hand immediately retracted at the prick that she felt on her hand. Like a million little needles had bit down on her. And when she checked her hand for anything, she saw black muck stuck to it. Disgusted, she wiped it on the covers but the thing felt sticky as hell. Soon enough, though, she wiped the whole thing off only leaving a faint discoloring from the irritation. No marks, though. Whatever the hell kind of animal or bug had been down there bit her but left no marks. "Little bastard…" she cussed as a small whisper back at the bottom of the bed.

"Masami?"

Embarrassed and caught off guard, Masami's head snapped up from underneath, chuckling as Kohaku furrowed her brow at her. "H-Haku, hey. Were you looking for me?"

"Yes," she replied, her confusion not leaving her face. "Mother and father want us to have breakfast together."

"Oh, of course." Masami raised from the floor and dusted her skirts off before going up to Kohaku. "Come on, Kohaku, let's not keep them waiting."

"Okay." With that Masami urged her towards the door, from time to time glancing down at her hand and seeing nothing.

 _A bug. It must've been._

As she thought that, a woman's chuckle came to the back of her mind. She heard it but chalked it up to some maid working nearby. That or she was simply still paranoid about what had happened last night with Kohaku. Maybe it was just her mind playing tricks on her.

So she took that for what it was and forgot about it, telling Kohaku to do the same.

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _Well, this is a first half of the extras. So far there's a total of seven extra stories, the latter three are longer which is what prompted me cut this in half and upload in two parts. The last three aren't requests but more like extras that didn't really fit into the story itself but that I couldn't just keep to myself. I'll leave my comments for those for next time. Also, sorry if some of the line breaks aren't there. FF isn't cooperating with me for some reason and I don't know how to fix it (-w-u)_

 _Because there's not much to say, I'll just write a little about each of these extras now._

 _I. This one is for Miqila. Although it isn't exactly all four children, I hope it's still good with only the two oldest._

 _II. This one is for Aviantei. I hope you enjoy this one, friend. I did say that Parisa's backstory would be told in another story, and it wouldn't be this one, so I figured I'd give you a snippet of what her good life was like. Hopefully, those who liked Parisa as well like this one._

 _III. Another one for Miqila. This one I actually had more fun writing because Sousei's character is easier to write for than Hakuryuu's, again he's one of mine so that's expected. Sorry that it was considerably shorter though and about how the focus shifted towards the end (blame my brain)._

 _IV. This one is a personal one. I wanted to write more with the Ren Princes before they died. Especially to show how her relationship was with Hakuyuu. The attack and Masami's encounter may seem weird now but it might make sense later if you're willing to read the stories that will come along in the future. Here's a hint: think Venom and the Symbiote._

 _I hope you guys enjoyed this. It's been hard not writing for Magi. And since I want to work on another story before starting another one, The Meaderer might be some ways away. So to deal with my own withdrawal, I'll be working on the other half and upload it when I can. Hopefully sometime soon._


	19. Extras: Part II

_**V. A Brother's Tale**_

* * *

"So, are you ready to be a big brother?"

It was a chilly fall afternoon when our mother told me those words as she laid in bed, exhausted but overall joyous, holding you tenderly in her arms as you slept rather quietly bundled in a warm blanket. I was just shy of nine years and I knew what entailed being an older brother. Or at least, I thought I did.

Throughout the nine months we waited for you, I was told it meant different things. Dad said that it meant protecting you. Mom said that it meant to always be your side. In my mind, those things weren't so different from one another. If I'm by your side—if we all were—we would be able to protect you from anything.

So my answer to her question was a resounding yes. And as I sat next to mom while she held you on her lap with her other arm around me, I couldn't help staring at you. So small, so fragile. So new to the world.

And yet I could feel myself already loving you.

"Then say hello to your little sister, Cael. Her name is Ceara."

* * *

Mom was the first to pass away. We were still living at Icaunus then, though it would soon be renamed the Eastern Isles. From what dad told me after she died, mom had always had a weak physique. The doctors had told her numerous times that having children would always hold a higher risk than normal for her because of it. There hadn't been a problem when I was born. I suppose, that's what brought hope to them, having survived my birth, that she could survive another.

And she did. For about a year and some months. That day she collapsed while at the marketplace. She'd left Ceara and I with a good friend of hers who watched over us while she did those errands. I still remember the last words she told me.

Be a good boy, Cael, she said, and take care of Ceara for me.

Dad was devastated. Even when I was still young, I could tell how much her death affected him. It affected all of us terribly. So after the funeral rites were done, he took us as far away from the Eastern Isles as he could. He had some friends on western coasts from the isles whom he got in touch with, so we settled there with them for awhile after she passed.

Within months, he had managed to get enough for a new home. It was small and nothing really special, but I called it home because that's what it was. To me and to you too. We didn't have much until dad enlisted in the newly formed military of a certain man. I didn't understand what the need to fight was or the why or how of our dad's interest in joining the man's cause. Not until much, much later. All I knew then was that dad was doing all this to give us a little more to eat everyday. All for the cost of having him away more than ever. I could tell he didn't like having to leave us by the forlorn smile he gave us. The first time he left to fight in a battle, he prepared me for his absence days on end. When the time for him to leave came, he simply patted my head, giving us each a kiss in turn, before telling me words I never once allowed myself to forget since mom said them to me.

Be a good boy, Cael, he told me, and take care of your sister.

And he left me, a ten-year-old, with a toddler sister of two alone for the first time out of many to come.

Three years of this same routine followed. As I grew older I became better suited to my life and more knowledgeable about the circumstances that surrounded us. Dad had brought us to a small country called Kou which had since before our arrival began to surge forward against two other smaller yet equally fearsome countries, Gou and Kai. The man that had called upon him and many others to rise had been Ren Hakutoku, a somewhat wealthy man with status in their country.

From what father told me many times whenever he returned from battles, this world was full of violence that although justified due to natural circumstances needed to be vanquished. And the way they sought to do that—the reason why dad fought—was to unify the countries in their side of the world. Their goal was the unify the warring nations of Kou, Gou, and Kai under the same mantle.

Back then, as young as I was, it struck me as a wonderful idea. If this unification of his stopped the wars, then dad could come home. That's what we wanted. So I blindly cheered alongside dad for this to happen until the time came that I didn't.

That was during my thirteenth birthday when dad came home. But unlike his usual happiness at being home, there was a solemnity to him. It wasn't after I put Ceara to bed that I found out why.

"...what?"

"It's conscription, son." Dad poured a cup of wine for himself and was about to pour water for me but thought better of it and instead filled my cup with wine as well. "The war against Gou and Kai is reaching its peak. And as such, Kou needs as much manpower as it can gather in order to guarantee its victory."

"But what about Ceara?"

"Your sister will stay in the nearby convent. The priesthood were convinced to take in the children left behind. She will live there until our return from battle."

He had an answer for everything. I never liked the idea of leaving you behind. But I also didn't like the idea of letting Gou and Kai win this war on their last legs and let the violence come to our doorstep and to you. So in the end, I only had one thing to say to him.

"When do we leave?"

* * *

I didn't see the end to that war until two years later. In that span of time, many things happened.

First was my training. It took a couple of months before I was able to enter the battlefield, especially since there we were one of the bigger troops. From what dad told me in the beginning after we left, our town was home to one of the generals directly under Ren Hakutoku. And the most prominent at that. His name was Reizei Koujiro and he was ruthless and just, both as a man and general. Although he received a majority of the conscripts, he meticulously went about training us before we even set foot on the battlegrounds. I like to believe that it was this fact that kept me alive for so long.

During one of these training sessions—us new recruits fighting against those older and more experienced than us—was when I first came into contact with General Reizei.

"You appear quite adept at this, boy. What is your name?"

Stepping back from my rigid stance, I gave the man before me a once over while brushing back the hair from my face. "Cael of Eriu, sir."

He stroked his chin a few times before nodding and letting his hands fall behind his back. "You are Evander's son."

"Yes." He proceeded to examine me all around as if I were some kind of specimen. It got me nervous and uncomfortable enough to open my mouth and ask, "Is there a problem, sir?"

"You are of the Eastern Isles. Icauni, correct?" He huffed at seeing the nod I gave as an answer. "My wife is an Icaunus as well."

"Small world," I commented but regretted not holding my tongue. Thankfully, the general saw some humor in it, letting of a lofty chuckle before slamming his hand against my back.

"I've heard your people aren't quite as adept as you and your father in the physical department. You are more of the studious kind. Scholars, I am told."

"A blanket statement, sir. I assure you that I am as capable as any other man in this camp in a fight."

"Prove it."

That threw me off the high horse I was just climbing onto. "E-Excuse me?"

He didn't answer me. Instead he pulled out his own sword and took his stance before me. "You heard me, boy. Show me what you have learned thus far."

At first, I was apprehensive. It's not like I could beat up my own superior, not to mention that I didn't have much confidence in my own abilities as a fighter despite my boasting and his compliments. Dad was the one that got me to accept his challenge; he overheard the conversation and convinced me to accept. He seemed to be able to sense my worry but assured me that all I had to do was my best and that'd be enough.

So I did. And I surprisingly held my own and almost beat the general to the ground. In the end, though, he threw me down instead after we both disarmed each other. The breath left my lungs the moment my back touched the floor but as he stood up, the general let out another boisterous bout of laughter.

"You're good, boy. You certainly show promise. But you've a lot to learn still." I thanked him for the 'compliment' and overheard what he told my father after I got to my feet. "You have a good son, Evander. Teach him well and I might consider him."

This lighted up dad's eyes and, afterwards, made my training a hell on earth. After that day, he pushed me during training and even further when we trained privately. It was only after we were to go into my first battle that I found out why: General Koujiro was searching for a right-hand man. With the amount of troops that were beginning to accumulate, it was necessary.

He had offered the position to dad but he refused. I don't know why. He never commented on it either. Dad did tell me that he had proposed me instead. A younger prospect was how he put it. It was obvious only after we returned from that battle why. Those of higher ranks were compensated highly.

I understood then that what he did was to grant us prosperity and opportunity. For me, he wanted the more likely chance to live. Being the right-hand man to the general meant that I would be in fewer battles, only in those in which the general himself would be present or those he commanded me to. Those were few already since he fought mostly by Ren Hakutoku's side in major battles. And the other was for you and I to have a livelihood from all of this.

And he was right. Becoming General Reizei's right-hand man was a goal that would benefit us three as a family. So I stopped doubting and began taking my training seriously, even more so than when I first got there. At that time, my mindset wasn't that I fought so as to not die in the present. I fought for the chance of a prosperous future.

It took a few battles and plenty of injuries on my part but eventually General Reizei asked. "Young man, I have a proposition for you: would you be my right-hand man?"

I couldn't have agreed fast enough.

Those were my six months as a rookie soldier who climbed up to reach his place in the military. As celebration for that promotion and another won battle against Kai, we returned to Shika and all soldiers took part in the feast the general threw complete with entertainment. I wasn't much interested in anything aside from the food and exploring the lavish home of our superior.

I had never seen an estate this grand in my whole life. It was as I walked the gardens outside the grand room where the feast was being held when I met her.

"You…" Her dainty voice and volume caught my attention instantly being so different from the boisterous shouting of the inside. At first I didn't know from where, not until she emerged from her hiding spot several feet away behind a large tree. From the corner, her dark blue eyes peeked over staring right at me. "You're one of father's soldiers. What are you doing out here?"

Father. She was one of the general's daughters. The older one, too, but by the looks of it, I was still older than her. Both of those things clear in my mind, I tried not scaring her as I replied to her query.

"It gets stuffy in there with so many drunken men," I said, pointing back at the room. "Sorry if I disturbed or scared you, my lady."

"You didn't." Her brow knitting together into a frown, she stepped out of her hiding spot to stand proudly, her back straight as she looked at me. "But you're forgiven. I have seen you before going around with father the few times the troops have been back. Who are you?"

"I am the general's right-hand man, my lady. My name is Cael of Eriu."

"Cael of Eriu? What a weird name."

"It's quite exotic, yes. I herald from the Eastern Isles, you see."

That seem to pique her interest as her expression changed into amazement. "My mother comes from there too!"

"So I've been told. And I can also see it quite well in your appearance too." She shared the distinct features of the Icauni I knew, mother and us included. Lighter shades of hair, blue eyes. But they seem a shade darker than mine or Ceara's. But that wasn't saying much when even ours appeared like the dark depths of the oceans compared to mother's. "You should leave from here, my lady. Surely your father wouldn't like you being near drunken men."

Her large eyes blinked at me at that comment and before I knew it, she sprinted off. I didn't mind it and instead went back to where the rest of the soldiers were. I didn't know it at the time but that girl that I would see grow into a splendid woman would mean the world to me one day.

The years went by and after two, the war against Gou and Kai seemed had reached an unexpected stalemate after a great battle, one known as _Lóng de dùzi._ It seemed that after too much fortune, it's sibling, misfortune, quickly followed into our lives. The Battle of _Lóng de dùzi_ was the first move of that misfortune.

We lost many soldiers and good men in that battle...including our father. Evander of Eriu died at _Lóng de dùzi_ adding to a total of 160,000 odd men from either side. It'd been a massacre, one that the savages from Gou and Kai sought to take advantage of, wanting to frighten our troops with shows of inhumanity.

I'll never forget that sight: bodies piled against one another at the trunk of the lone oak that parted the plains. Their bodies mutilated and desecrated, heads on pikes or rounded together with ropes and hung from the branches, the heaviness of the dead weighing nature down as the blood soaked her feet. Men, women, old, young—god, _the children._ I couldn't face them. Not when all I saw on their faces was yours. It was horrendous to witness the sight of such atrocity. To rob them not only of their lives but of the sacredness that should be their burial was despicable.

Ren Hakutoku—no. Our emperor spoke his truth in volumes and it rang true with me. Despite the atrocities, the ones who'd done this were human, scared of being robbed of what they loved. I could understand that. I saw validity in that.

Because as much as I thought of them as monsters, I couldn't think any more of myself when after they had killed father, I could think of nothing but do the same to them. I swallowed my hatred and grief and let it burn alongside the pyre that was made for the mass of dead soldiers. Cremation was the way for Kou's soldiers. That way they're bodies would become a part of the land and live through it, nourishing it. Dad went with the thousands of others up in flames. I went back home to you, body torn and spirit broken after that.

"Cae-nii?" In your eyes, the moment I came home, I saw joy and confusion alike. Joy at seeing me, confusion from not seeing dad, surely.

Seeing you was what made my resolve burn once more despite my sadness only growing tenfold as I brought you inside to tell you.

"Speirr, dad...isn't coming home anymore."

"Why?"

"He's—" I had to tell you. I had to. "Speirr, dad died."

It took a minute. When it sunk in, you denied it, saying that it was absurd. That he was just late and that he would surely walk through the door any minute now. I couldn't bare look at you like that so I held you close repeating to you that he wasn't. He was never going to walk through that door and greet us. He would never tell us he loved us again.

He was gone and we were alone.

But as we cried in each other's arms, holding one another as strong as we could, the words they left with me carved themselves into my mind and heart. Mom and dad were gone but I would keep the promise I made to them.

I would take care of you.

* * *

After dad's death you were less than complacent about me leaving for battle again. I can't say I blame you. Having lost him, even I was apprehensive about returning. But I had a duty to fulfill. Besides that, I didn't want that evil to come to you either.

I had to return. But as stubborn about it as you were I ended up promising you something I didn't know if I could keep. I would try my damn hardest to, though. And because it was the only thing I could think of, I made the promise tangible for you.

"What are these?" Your nose scrunched up at the two pieces of silver that laid in the box I held before you.

"A present...and a promise." Taking one of the pieces out, I held the silver carnation hairpin in one hand to show it to you. "You know what this flower is?"

"Carnation."

"Do you know what carnations mean?" When you shook your head, I asked you to turn around and let me do your hair. After having many years of doing it, the action was effortless and soon I had made a good sized bun with how long your hair had gotten— _was it always this long?_ —and held it together by placing the hairpin through. "They mean pure love and good luck. You like these, don't you?"

"Mm," you replied still a bit confused about it.

"Mom liked them too. They were her favorites." Undoing my own hair, I made it so I could place the other hairpin, one identical to yours, in place to hold it up. "I'm giving you this as a promise that no matter where or how I am, that you'll always have me and my love for you here with you. These are a pair, and as long as we have them with us, we will always be connected."

"Liar." You were obviously not buying it by a longshot but something in me told me you wanted to. Even at seven, you were smart enough to doubt me and my promises. War had already taken away from us and you knew that it could just as easily take what was left away as well. I knew that too. But I couldn't just stand back and do nothing.

"I'm not lying," I admitted and held you close. "This is my promise to you, Ceara. I'll always love you and care for you no matter what happens to me. But more than that I promise that I'll try my hardest to come back to you."

You finally held me back as I said those words. "You promise? You promise you won't leave me alone, that you'll come back?"

"Always."

That promise was enough to ease you into letting me go once more, no matter how much you cried the day I did leave. To be fair and completely honest, I wasn't completely happy. I had been told that the convent was starting to get their hands full with how many children were being orphaned because of this ongoing war. And because they were prioritizing the care of those children with no living relatives, those they housed because their families were off fighting were left to pretty much their own devices.

I didn't like that. It bothered me greatly to know that while I was off fighting, you weren't being properly taken care of. And that concern showed. During the small reprieve Kou took to regain it's lost numbers, I trained at the Reizei estate with the rest of the soldiers when General Koujiro called me aside.

"Sir?"

"Is something bothering you, son?" Averting my eyes, I ignored the name he had been fond of using for me before replying with a resounding no. He didn't quite believe me. "Let me guess, is it the young one you take care of? Is this about your younger sister?"

His accuracy astounded me. "How did you—"

He stopped me with a raised hand before continuing. "Evander was a good soldier and man. As close as your father and I were, he told me many times of his two children, a boy and girl. After meeting you, I assumed her to be younger. How far apart are you in age?"

At first, I wasn't sure whether to answer for I didn't know where this conversation was going. In the end, I replied as simply as I could. "Ceara and I are eight years apart. She's eight."

"I see. And I presume you worry about her wellbeing in Shika while we're away."

"Very much, sir." Having a bit more confidence, I tell him about my concerns with her growing up in the convent without proper care or supervision. As a father, I assume his mutter was of understanding. And it seems I was right seeing what he proposed to me.

"Tell me, son, how would you feel about your sister staying at my estate."

"Sir, I appreciate the thought but—"

"Hear me out," he said, placating my confusion with a raised hand. "It has been quite troublesome to get my second daughter a vassal. I presume that it's their age that bothers her since most of them have been much older than her. It would seem she and your sister are but a couple of years apart. It's my thought that maybe she could find a friend more than a servant in someone like her. I'm not urging you to answer me now. Take this as a friendly suggestion."

General Koujiro explained to me further that as his daughter's vassal, you would have shelter and food and would be properly taken care of by the rest of the servants in the estate. Not only that but as a vassal you would also be properly educated for the role. The more he spoke, the more convincing her sounded to me. In all honesty, I knew you wouldn't like it and it would take some time to convince you, but as things stood, I felt better leaving you in their hands than in some other strangers'. So before I even talked to you about it, I accepted his offer.

And as expected, you did not take it well at all. In fact, when I went to you that night and told you about what I'd accepted, you broke down crying before throwing several things at me and running away. I had no qualms in finding you though. Usually when you were angry or upset, you went to the nearby jetty where we used to go fishing when little. Back before I went to fight in the war.

When I found you, you were crying your eyes out, saying that you would change and not be a burden for me anymore. You would do all that if only I would not send you away.

"No, Ceara, you're not a burden." I held you tightly against me, watching the sea at night ebb and flow as you cried. "It's me that's worried about you. I can't let you live here when nobody takes care of you."

"I know how to take care of myself," you contended, "so you don't have to do this. I'll be good, I promise."

"You already are, Speirr," I assured you, bringing you to arm's length to wipe away your tears and runny nose. "This is me, though. I easily worry about you. Especially because it's you."

"Really?"

I nodded at you and smiled. "So you see, this is for you to have a better life while I'm gone. It's so that I can rest assured that you're in good hands while I'm not with you. And I know that in the Reizei estate you'll be in good hands."

You sniffled a couple more times before sticking your face against my chest and holding me as tightly as you could. "What if I don't get along with this girl?"

"Who wouldn't love you?"

"The kids at the convent don't. They're boring, though. And they complain a lot about me being a loudmouth."

"I'm sure you'll be plenty entertained at the estate and nobody there will call you that. So are you willing to do this, Speirr?"

After a quiet moment, you sighed and noded languidly. "I'll try for you, Cae-nii. But you've gotta promise to come back."

"I already have," I reminded you, touching the hairpin that holds your hair up. The one that resembled mine. "But I will again if it makes you feel better."

"It will."

I hold you tightly then, like I'm holding you for the first and last time. "I promise you I'll come back home to you, Speirr. I always will."

So on the summer of that year, you became the vassal of a young lady, the second daughter of the general, Reizei Kohaku.

* * *

Over the next year, I spent more and more time at the Reizei estate not only to train the new conscripts that came but also to watch over you as you became acquainted with your position. It seemed that you and Lady Kohaku kicked it off well enough and although you were never one to play well with others, you got along with her pretty well.

One thing that bothered me was the way you two resembled each other. You were always small for your size since mom had you before it was time but I never realized how this made you look several years younger than you actually were. Having you side by side with another Icaunus only reminded me of how small and fragile you were inside and out. It reminded me what I was supposed to protect more fervently than ever.

Through that year as well, I would often go around the estate working for the general and would meet the little lady that I met two years prior. It was during that year that I finally learned her name: Reizei Masami.

We were four years apart but Lady Masami was always eager to learn from her father and me about the status of the country and the war. The general often dismissed her, telling her that those kind of things she shouldn't bother knowing. I disagreed. As a citizen of this country and daughter of a very prominent general, it was her birthright to succeed his role. I knew better than to question him about this though. Instead, I did my best to answer what I could of the questions she had.

Lady Masami was curious by nature and according to her, I was a good teacher. Very patient and kind. I noted often how the general's loud voice would make her flinch visibly. It made me self-conscious of my own tone and volume when I was around her. I also noticed how she hated being near him whenever he drank. I could see why too. Despite how honorable a man and general he was, Reizei Koujiro was a foul beast when intoxicated. Us as soldiers could take that harsh mouth and brutal attitude of his when directed toward us. It was our daily bread and butter from him after all. But I was guessing that such thing could easily scare a girl.

Not a girl, really. Despite being so young, Lady Masami was very mature for her age. Knowledgeable as well. It was quite nice to be able to sustain a conversation with her about plenty of things. In all aspects, she had grown into a very respectable woman.

One that I started to see in a different light after she confessed something to me.

"P-Pardon me but I must've misheard you."

"You didn't." It had been one morning after her studies that she found me and invited me for some tea so we could talk. That wasn't weird. She would often do this when she had the chance. And since I often trained by myself in the early morning, tea often did wonders to help me soothe me down for the afternoon trainees. Usually, this was the time she would take to ask me about any queries she had about the world or the war at large. But this time, she had hit me with something I didn't quite expect. "I said that I like you, Cael."

"Well, Lady Masami, I surely do appreciate you as well but—"

"No, you idiot, I like you as in I like you, like you!" she hissed, seemingly wanting to shout it in my face but finding it in herself to quietly hiss instead. "I love you, Cael."

That confession hit me hard. No one had said that before to me. It was actually cute but just as embarrassing to hear it. Especially from someone like her, who not only was younger than me but also my superior's daughter. But a part of me couldn't help being happy. This young woman was one I could speak to freely despite our differing status. She sought me out of curiosity; I answered her out of respect. But her curiosity grew into what she thought was love; my respect grew into...something.

I couldn't quite tell what exactly.

"I'm grateful that you have those feelings for me, Lady Masami. However I don't know how this can work out." Her hopes seemingly dashed, her expression fell into grief. Before she completely sank into her despair, I spoke and, as apprehensive as I was, I couldn't believe what I decided to tell her. "But maybe this is just my mindset that's hindering this. I appreciate you as well, Lady Masami, perhaps I do like you in the same way you do. But that's a little too early for me to tell."

"T-Then what about a trial!"

"A trial?"

"Like a test," she proposed, face flushed as she struggled to put her words out for me. "For a while, let's continue like we have. B-But instead of just seeing me as my father's daughter, see me as a woman."

"That's kind of hard to do," I confessed.

"That's why it's a trial, it's to try. You have to see me as a woman and I'll see you as a man. Nothing about status or ranks. I'll just be Masami and you Cael. And if by the end of the year you still think the same then I'll forget about this."

The end of the year. That meant six months of this. What she asked was crazy. I should have stopped her then and there and cut any contact with her to let her forget about it. But I don't know what in gods' name compelled me to say otherwise.

"Alright, if that'll quell you, then I'll try it, my lady."

Her face brightened up, her doe-like eyes shining as her smile widened at my answer. "T-Thank you." The smile became small as her cheeks dusted a bit pink. "But...if it's not much to ask, when we're alone, could you maybe call me by only my name? And could I do the same?"

I was treading dangerous waters, but by then my head wasn't in control anymore. Something more powerful guided me from then onwards where she was concerned. "Sure, Masami."

After that, for the next year that I was stationed at Shika to train the new recruits, I became more acquainted with Masami. I always had in mind that she was younger than me by four years and that made me apprehensive, not counting the fact that she was my superior's daughter. Yet I couldn't help but start to enjoy our interactions and how they became more intimidate as the year went by. We weren't soldier and young lady anymore, just a boy and a girl engaging in mutual courtship.

And I have to admit that after awhile I did indeed begin to take the courtship seriously. Getting to know her after consciously ignoring her because of who she was was nice. She was quite mature for her age in some aspects, in others I could tell how age separated us. With this in mind, I kept things slow. Some well-meant words here, meaningful gifts there; before I knew it, she came to mean much to me. Well after her fourteenth birthday, I gifted her one thing and said to her the one thing in particular that I never thought I'd say to anybody other than you.

"It's beautiful." It wasn't. It was a simple silver band that thankfully fit just right onto her ring-finger. A custom that nobody in the east in Kou knew of but that was pretty common in the isles. Mom wore a similar ring, something she said dad gave her long ago. It wasn't after I got older that I knew what for. Surely, it had been for the same reason I gave it to Masami.

"Yes, you are." Her cheeks darkened as she flustered, the change easily noticeable on her fair skin. "It's not much but it reminded me of you." As I said this, I reached out and brushed strands of her hair that obscured her face from my eyes behind her ear. "Pure, simple, yet precious."

"Simple?"

"Well, you are," I admitted. "When you're happy, you're happy. When you're angry, you're angry. No matter what it is, I can tell easily just by looking. You're transparent and it's quite refreshing when so many people hide what they truly want or who they really are."

"Are you lying to me, Cael?"

That question surprised me somewhat. Had we not been doing this for the better part of a year? "Of course not, what makes you think that?"

"Just…" She hid her gaze, averting it from my sight as she spoke. Before I knew it though, she shook her head. "Never mind."

I didn't let it go though. "Masami, please tell me. If there's something bothering you of what I'm doing, or not doing for that matter, you should feel free to tell me. Isn't that what we decided on?"

At hitting her with this, she pursed her lips before that smile that I loved came to them again. "You're right. It's just that I'm...uncertain. I don't know if what you're doing is actually what you want to do or if I'm the one forcing you to do all this."

Oh. That was a justifiable doubt. Very well thought out for her age again. That kind of thinking was healthy, though, so I gave her the truth as a reward. "Maybe at first I did indulge you. I thought back then that you'd bore out of this infatuation and that we'd go on our merry ways afterward. But the more I got to know you, the more I began to realize something about myself: I'm an idiot." This obviously confused her and made me chuckle. Before she could blow a fuse, though, I explained further. "I'm an idiot for not having taken you seriously from the start, Masami. A lot of things weighed in my mind about this—they still do—but I'm working on seeing past that to discover what it is I'm feeling. For now, all I can tell you for sure is that I care very much for you. Perhaps not to the extent that you might for me but I can certainly tell it's something big."

"Really?" she asked somewhat incredulous.

"Yes, but I'm working slowly through it as I said. I don't want to hurry anything. You're still young, this could still change, so I'll take it slow with you. You're precious to me, and maybe that means that I do like you as you do me, but I can't act on anything for now."

"That's fine!" she exclaimed but quickly covered her mouth just as I started to hush her. We were still in the estate, although in a secluded area near the woods. Somebody could easily overhear us if we spoke too loudly. Once calm, she reiterated her words, her cheeks just as flushed as before. "That's alright. I know I'm too young for many things still but I'm willing to wait as long as it takes if what you say is true."

"It is," I assured her. "I have no reason to lie to you."

"Neither do I. B-But having said that." She began to fumble with her words then and the scene began to be reminiscent of many others before. "I was wondering if maybe...this time we could actually..."

I knew exactly what she wanted to ask before she even said. She'd asked it of me many times before, wanting to rush in for some reason. I didn't see the need for such rush. Now, though, I felt a bit of what she described feeling around me. And I thought I knew what drove her to want more.

"Close your eyes." She easily did as she was told and simply sat there, her cheeks molten red. Wanting to appease both of us, I slowly leaned in.

The time with her felt ephemeral and precious. And because it felt that way, I wanted to preserve it for as long as I could all the while wanting to keep that feeling lit with new experiences. Despite this, though, I still managed to have some restrain.

Instead of fully placing my lips against hers, I swerved to the side and kissed the side of her lips instead, barely having the edges touch before pulling back. I didn't know she could get any redder but she did as she pulled away.

"T-That wasn't—"

"Never said I would," I chuckled, her childishness infecting me as well. "Remember, I'm taking this slow with you. I may love you but I'm not going to push you to it either."

"Say that again."

I blinked a couple of times as what I said ran through my mind. Once I got to what she more than likely meant, I smiled, finding it in me to say it without regret. "I love you, Masami." Leaning in closer, I gave a chaste kiss to her forehead. "But like I said, I won't rush this. You're too precious to me to do that."

"F-Fine," she said quietly. It seemed my impromptu confession placated her. Having said those words also calmed me plenty, like a load off my chest.

And it sent me away in good spirits for the last battle that ended the wars against Gou and Kai and united the Tenken Plateau. That fight would be the first of many where General Koujiro would send me to fight alongside the main corp where the emperor and his eldest sons fought. That would be the first battle where I met Ren Hakuyuu and Hakuren.

The battle lasted five whole days but at the end of it all we reigned victorious. In the end, we returned to the capital of the newly formed Kou Empire where Ren Hakutoku was crowned emperor. I, as well as the whole of the military, vowed our allegiance to him and the imperial family. This would be the beginning of a new era for us.

It certainly felt like it too.

All of Rakushou celebrated and that brought people together. Thankfully, it brought you to me as far apart as we were from each other. The Reizei family came in celebration of the newly united nation. The general had been one, if not the major, ally of Emperor Hakutoku in this endeavor and was graciously invited along. The invitation extended to his family as well which meant that you came to me.

That day was the happiest of both our lives, I'm sure. Relieved of my duties for the day, I found you and asked for your relieve as well. Reluctantly and with Masami's convincing, your charge, little Miss Kohaku, agreed. With that we spent the day away, enjoying what the capital of our country had to give. In the end, as exhausted as you were, I carried you on my back as we returned to the imperial palace.

You sang under your breath sleepily as I hummed alongside you quietly. Mom's song—one she had sang to both of us and that I had taught you—rang quietly through the night that after hours of festivity had quieted down. It usually helped you sleep but with how tired you were after so much fun, there wasn't really a need for it. You just sang it out of pure joy apparently. But by the time we returned to the palace, you were already sound asleep. I was ready to leave you with the Reizei's when I met him personally, Prince Hakuyuu.

"I apologize, your highness," I told him when we encountered him exiting one of the large meeting rooms. As full as my hands were at the moment, I couldn't very well salute him as he deserved.

Seeing you on my back, he excused me with a smile. "You're one of the soldiers who fought with us, aren't you?" Frankly, I was quite surprised he recognized me out of the many that joined his battalion during those last few days. My voice not working, I simply nodded at him. "I'm glad you returned to your family."

That's something we could agree on. Before I could answer this to him, though, the doors from the exact room he'd been in opened to reveal the emperor himself followed by General Koujiro, both laughing boisterously. Their loud voices made you stir a bit but they quieted when noticing us in the middle of the hallway.

"Cael, my son, returning late from the bash, I see!" Loud. Uncharacteristically obnoxious. Yeah, he was drunk. Or at least getting there.

Nonetheless, I answered him. "Yes, sir. We both are."

Thankfully, he wasn't as far gone to not see what I meant and noticed you on my back. "Ah, yes. Little Ceara. Were you on your way to return her to my daughter's quarters?" At my nod, he shook his head. "Forget it for tonight. Take her with you and enjoy the time you have together. It's been quite the while, hasn't it?"

It had. Years of it. "Thank you, sir. Being that so, I will be excusing ourselves then. I believe we both need our much needed rest."

"Of course, of course. Be on your way then."

"Your majesty, your highness, have a goodnight as well."

The emperor smiled our way and gave a nod. "Be well, young man." As I turned my back on them to this time head to my room, I overheard the general loudly speaking about me to the emperor. It was more embarrassing than anything, really, since he was getting drunk. Both of them, I presume. But those thoughts escaped me when I heard footsteps that trotted behind us.

"I thought I recalled your face, too," Prince Hakuyuu spoke quietly, sparing you, as he walked beside me. "You're General Koujiro's right-hand man. Cael of Eriu if I remember correctly. He sent you and the major squad to us."

"I'm flattered to be remembered, your highness."

"You've earned that recognition, I believe. You fought very well out there, although I could see some improvement could be made on your temper."

Ah, yes. His ever-evolving flaw. It's the one thing that the general had always pointed out to him as well. Even now that he had trained and after years of fighting, there were times his emotions could control him and make him do stupid things. Apparently, he'd done enough stupid during those five days to be remembered too. Oh well, at least there were some positive things sprinkled about in that too.

"I've been made aware, yes. General Koujiro and I have been working on such thing since he took me under his command. I hope it didn't inconvene either of your highnesses."

"On the contrary, your passion was quite admirable." His eyes fell behind me to where you laid sleeping, your very light snoring making me chuckle somewhat. "It's obvious what brings about that passion now. Is she your sister?"

"Yes."

"Is she your only family?"

"Regrettably. Our mother died at our hometown when we were still young. Our father died at the battle of _Lóng de dùzi_."

That seemed to dampen his mood quite a bit. It did the same to me somewhat but after years of internalizing it, I'd come to peace with it. "I'm sorry about having asked."

"It's nothing you have to apologize for." I meant that. Father's choice had been to fight as was mine. He fought for us, I fought for you. We both fought for a better future. "We knew the risks. It was our choice to join, after all, in spite of the conscripts."

"You were one of those conscripted?"

"Fresh of turning thirteen back when they were announced."

"The war is over now. Surely you have received notice of my father's new military decree."

I had and the information was fresh in my mind. Now that the three warring nations were now one, all conscripts had a choice of whether to remain or be discharged honorably from the military in order to return home. I could finally go back to you.

But something stopped me from agreeing to be discharged when I heard the news. I don't know what it was. I just knew that I couldn't give an answer that quickly. I needed time to think about what I would do from now on. I wanted to be with you finally in peace, in this nation we created. But something urged me to wait.

"I have. However, I asked the general to allow me some time to think about it. I'm still...unsure of what I must do."

"Of course."

When we finally arrived to the quarters the soldiers had been given, I stopped and bowed as well as I could to him. "If you'll excuse us, your highness."

"Yes, have a goodnight." I had my hand on the door when he raised his voice again to my surprise. "If you are unsure of what to do next, Cael, then perhaps you might want to join the meeting in a few days."

"Meeting?"

"Pertaining what will be done from now onwards. My father, despite having joined the three nations, as well as us, still has many things to accomplish. Perhaps you'd be one to agree with our goals."

I didn't accept nor decline. I thanked him for the information and left to my room before setting you down to sleep on a comfortable bed at last. And as I watched you sleep through most of the night, I pondered his words. His father and them still had things to accomplish. I couldn't see what would matter now that peace finally came to our country.

At least not until I heard them speak a few days later during that meeting. Erasure of war, not just from the Tenka region but from the entire world. And as crazy and idealistic as the idea sounded, it resonated with me. It's why I decided, despite all that had been accomplished, that I would remain as a soldier and as the general's right-hand man.

I never told you about the decree. I never told you about my choice. I didn't want you to hate me for it, I think. They gave us a year of reprieve; it wasn't much of one for me, though.

The year we remained at Rakushou, General Koujiro had me train the new recruits once more, this time for the new goal of the emperor to expand west. It wouldn't be started until later but they wanted the soldiers ready. So as such I worked. By the time I was eighteen, many of the soldiers called me a veteran because of my involvement with the unity wars. I never saw it as such. I was still just a boy despite my experiences. I had many things in my favor but time wasn't one of them.

I was too young and naive. The latter showed when I thought that during that year I could keep up with you and even with the new relationship I had garnered with Masami. Although secret, we had decided on it together after the wars were done and she turned fourteen. She had the faith that as long as she could prove her autonomy and worth in this new era of our country where strategy and war knowledge was needed, that she would be given the luxury of choice. Masami believed fervently that she could change the fate she was born to carry as the general's daughter. I hoped for the same as well. As for you, you seemed to have taken to a life apart from us. I was happy that you had opened to another after having only myself for company. Miss Kohaku was a shy and sometimes enthusiastic little sun, one that brightened you more than I ever had. It was like watching a flower bloom after years of being deprived of its due sunshine. You two seemed to have grown together, nourishing one another into what I saw now before me.

But just as I saw you and Masami rise before my eyes, it seemed that I couldn't keep both. Eventually, I saw one fall.

At first I overheard the news from the maids which quickly extended outward to the soldiers of Shikan origin. Our young lady of the Reizei Household had been betrothed to the First Prince of the Kou Empire, Ren Hakuyuu. I couldn't believe my ears. At least not until I heard it from her. When she affirmed the gossip surged throughout the palace, I couldn't discern exactly what I felt.

Disappointment. Grief. Loneliness. And not just for me—actually, after a few minutes of thinking, I felt horribly about all this for her as well.

"I'm sorry," I quietly said to her as she wept into her sleeves. She'd snuck out a few nights later with me and we met outside the palace, away from prying ears and eyes. My apology sounded dry to me, like I was giving up. A part of me thought it'd be best to do so if for her sake. Fighting this would be a losing battle, I knew that much with certaint. The other wanted to try no matter how hopeless it actually was, and Masami seemed to agree with that.

"Father h-had been talking with the emperor and the prince. B-But I can change this! I can still make father change his mind!" Masami turned to me with a determination that urged her forward but one that didn't seem to reach her eyes. "We can change his mind. He knows you. He wouldn't say no."

"...he would," I firmly stated as I wiped her tears away. Out of the numerous things he was, General Koujiro was mostly a loyal opportunist. Although he did believe in the emperor's ideals as both his general and friend, he also sought for the betterment of his own familial status. I was guessing that it was this part of his nature that got him to accept the union. It wouldn't be surprising, either, if he'd been the one to propose it. By Masami's frown and the tears that began to pour freely once more, I knew that she also saw the truth in my words.

"I don't want to marry him. I don't even love him."

"It'll be hard to marry someone you don't love. And believe me that this also tears me inside, but it's not something we can change by simply wishing it hard enough."

"You're wrong."

"We both know I'm not." Reaching out for it, I grabbed her hand in my, entwining our fingers. I opened my mouth and closed it several times, thinking about what to say to get her to accept what I knew she was smart enough to understand. But I didn't want to destroy her hopes alongside mine. She was so innocent and headstrong, so beautiful and loving; I didn't want to destroy that. "We cannot change what's to happen, Masami. You and I have to accept—" Before I could even finish my sentence, she threw herself at me, crying her heart out as I held her close. It broke my heart that I couldn't do anything other than that.

When her cries quieted a bit, it allowed her room to speak despite her voice being so quiet itself. "You're right...and I get that. I just—" she sniffled loudly, wiping her face as she pulled back from me, "I don't want to leave you. I don't want you to go away."

"Then I'll stay." I didn't know what possessed me to say those words. I didn't regret saying them though because it was what I truly wanted as well. "I'll be with you until the time comes I can't anymore. And even then, with what life I'm allowed, I'll climbed the ranks into the royal military and from there protect you and yours. That's my promise to you."

Masami didn't answer and instead nodded. From that point onwards and during the whole of her engagement with Prince Hakuyuu, she and I kept our relationship even more hidden than before. It was our choice to be together for as long as time allowed us. We kept meeting out of sight from prying eyes, out of earshot from hidden ears. And for once I felt the urgency of her love and the love I held for her that only grew now that I knew I would eventually lose her.

But then the time came for the Reizei to return to Shika. The militia would remain behind in the capital seeing as our first excursion to expand further west would come upon us soon. A celebratory gathering was held that night. For those of higher status, it was a dinner to pray for glory to the Kou Empire. For people like me and you, it was yet another farewell. One I was unaware would be our last.

At first I didn't recognize you. It didn't look like you. When I saw you trying to catch my attention all I saw in the beginning was little Miss Kohaku. But as I stared into yours eyes—those eyes so vibrant and full of vitality like mom's—I knew that it was you. You were dressed as Miss Kohaku.

Had I not known you for my whole life I wouldn't have been the wiser. Just like Masami and the rest of her family had been. It was during the middle of the party when everything was reaching it's boisterous climax that I saw you motioning off to the side minutes before you scurried away from everybody else and disappeared behind heavy curtains. I followed behind you as discreetly as I could and found you hiding some ways away in the hallway that separated the room from the outside gardens.

The smile you gave me, small yet cheeky, only solidified my suspicion. "What do you think you're doing, Speirr?" I called to you with a sigh.

Your features softened and your smile became sincere. "I came to say goodbye."

I couldn't keep the grimace that came to me. I hadn't told you about my staying behind in Rakushou to continue fighting but the fact that you were here meant that someone had told you. And by the ploy you were pulling now, I assumed it to be the little miss. Kneeling before you, I took you into the biggest hug I could and you held me tightly in return. "You shouldn't have. You'll get in trouble if you get caught."

"No one will know. That's what Haku said. And it seems to be true." Your small nose scrunched up as you smiled at me. "Nobody's noticed."

"I did," I told you, brushing your hair behind your ear. "Don't do something as reckless as this again, Ceara. You can't be disobeying them. I don't want you to be left out without anywhere or anyone to go back to, you hear?"

"I won't." Confident as you were, you held your head high as you glanced down at me, your eyes wide and bright as you spoke and touched the hairpin that held my hair in place. "Because you'll come back. No matter where you're going or who you fight, you'll come back to me, right Cael?"

With a nod, I took your cheeks in my hands. So fragile, so small. "I will." Mimicking your gesture, I touched the same hairpin that held your caramel tresses much like mine. I leaned forward and kiss your forehead and embraced you tightly once more. "I promise you I always will."

The moment broke as I heard footsteps coming our way. I reluctantly let go of you before standing up just in time to see Prince Hakuyuu turning the corner. He wasn't alone, though. With him was another boy, one I vaguely recognized. This redhead boy fought with us in the last battle. If I remembered correctly, he was one of the emperor's nephews and some years younger than me as well. "Evening." Prince Hakuyuu smiled at both of us before addressing you, "Kohaku, your sister is searching for you."

"O-Oh no, I'm sorry," you stuttered, bowing nervously. You surely didn't like this plan by how nervous you appeared but when I placed a reassuring hand on your shoulder, you calmed down significantly and smiled back at him while giving me a sidelong glance. "I wasn't feeling too well. I asked Papa's soldier to help me."

"I gave her some water to calm her stomach. Seems she ate a little too much," I added to make your story a bit more believable. I hear you chuckle under your breath when I said this.

"I see. If you're feeling unwell still, Kouen and I can escort you back to your room." That was his name: Ren Kouen.

You shook your head and smiled back before bowing respectfully. "I-I appreciate your concern, your highness but I'm feeling better now. I guess I won't be eating much more after this, though."

Prince Hakuyuu agreed and asked Kouen to bring you back to Masami. As you trotted to the boy and walked alongside him back to the room, you glanced back at me. The only thing I could do was give you a smile, one that you saw and reciprocated before you turned the corner.

"What a precocious little girl."

"She is," I agreed quietly.

"By the way, Cael, I heard you chose to join us for the venture towards the west." I gave him a nod as my answer and he gave me a sad smile. "I have to thank you then. Knowing who you're leaving behind, it must have been a hard choice."

"I do it to bring her a prosperous future, your highness. So pardon my imprudence but what I do, I do because I want her to be happy."

"I understand that sentiment. I also wish for my own family to leave happily and in peace in this nation we've made. One we're still making."

"One we'll make happen." We walked together back to the room where the celebration was being held. When we reached the doors, they spring open befor Masami scurried out of, face flushed.

"My apologies," she quickly responded with a bow. Her eyes flashed between the two of us before landing on the prince. "Have you found Kohaku, your highness?"

"Kouen took her back here, didn't he?"

Before she could answer, you pop from gods knew where from inside the room with Kouen by your side. "M-Masami onee-sama, I'm over here."

"Oh goodness, Haku," she huffed, her cheeks flushed before turning to us and bowing again. "Thank you, your highness."

"There's no reason to thank me." Prince Hakuyuu motioned to me instead. "One of your father's soldiers found her, Cael of Eriu."

Her eyes lingered on mine for an instant as she remained dumbfounded at what to do, how to act. I didn't falter. I bowed in front of her. This finally got her to take a better stance as she thanked me, stumbling in her words. "There's no need for gratitude, my lady. Looking after you and your family is my duty, after all."

"Y-Yes...of course," she replied quite deflated. Masami thanked us both nonetheless before leaving to return to you as you took a small speech from her about not leaving her side again. That night was the last I saw of you before we went off to fight in the west.

You would soon turn eleven. All that was in my mind back then were not the fights to come or the blood that I would shed for this country. All I could think of that made this worthwhile was the future that I would have remaining with you.

That and what I could possibly gift you for your eleventh birthday.

* * *

 _Xī máo_ was a large plain that fell more to the eastern side of the Tenzen plateau. It connected the southwest that bordered the villages and towns governed by Shika and the eastern cities that surrounded Rakushou. They were notorious for their fertility and from what I overheard was what gave it its native name, _Zìrán de zigōng_.

But instead bearing nature as if should have, that day a battle ensued that drenched the fertile lands in blood. And what's more, the battle that took place at _Xī máo_ was one we hadn't planned. It had been an ambush by exiles of Gou and Kai that wished to fight further even after their countries had already fallen and united under Kou's banner. But I realized then that a fire in a man's heart couldn't be extinguished by mere conquest or submission.

It appeared that the Imperial Family had been more than ready to encounter these types of rebellions after the unification of the three countries. Neither the emperor nor Prince Hakuyuu had been surprised by the attack that threatened our borders even before dawn's break. Without a moment's hesitation, they rounded the main battalion of 100,000 men. Although the numbers sounded small in comparison to other times, it seemed logical. There wasn't a reason to employ the lives of many when the threats, although present, were small in scale.

But we were wrong to underestimate them. Yes, they might have been few in numbers but they were also fierce and driven by mad revenge against the imperial family and those that served them. Not only that but they carried a handful of odd weapons that could perform extraordinary things. Magic is what Prince Hakuyuu called it. It wasn't something we saw anything of in the east. Nonetheless, we fought. But it appeared that the magic weapons they used were putting a clear dent on our numbers.

It was when they hit a certain low that Prince Hakuyuu, who commanded us straight west as his father and the General took the northern and southern fronts so as for us not to be surrounded, that he finally called for a retreat. Us underestimating them had been a mistake. We needed to back off.

"We can make them retreat, your highness!" Overhearing Kouen's loud voice roar after Prince Hakuyuu had given his command made me turn to him as he stood amidst the crowd, his sword still in hand.

"No, Kouen. We retreat, now!"

But the boy didn't listen. Instead what I saw was a bright light shine from his pauldron before his whole body morphed into something animalistic and small. It was like a lion's cub mixed with a small boy's body with a right hand larger than even the rest of his body that held a distinctive eight-pointed star emblem on it. His eyes shining red, the beast I recognized soon as Kouen laid waste upon the enemy, shifting the ground beneath them and attacking them with the magnitude of his powers.

Awed and terrified by the power he wielded, I recalled then the rumors that had been told about the young boy, the emperor's nephew, and how he had gone into one of those legendary towers. The ones said to kill over thousands of men who searched for glory and one treasure in particular. "A metal vessel…"

"Kouen!" Prince Hakuyuu's exclaim caught my attention as he rode close to me. But as he did, the soldiers that had been told by him to retreat, invigorated by Kouen's advance, went forth along with him. "Damn. Cael, we can't defend this with the number of men we have."

"I know." I agreed but as I watched the fight ensue before us, I also knew something else. "But they won't retreat now that Master Kouen has gone forth. You can't command a beast wild with power to retreat."

"Kouen isn't a beast!" Prince Hakuren shouted over the noise. "He'll listen to Yuu!"

"No, he won't." Glad that his highness at least accepted that gave me hope. Magic against magic. No matter how foreign a concept it was to us in the east, if we could counter it and with everything else equal, we were still the better army. There was still a chance for us to win.

"That leaves one way to go."

Hakuyuu gave the command to advance to the portion of the army that listened to him and we all headed after the young master. The power he held was indomitable. It gave strength to the soldiers that were still left, it gave them vitality. And we surged forward.

But as I saw a towering flower of earth burst from the ground, my eyes searched for the boy that suddenly lost his lion form and fell to his knees, sword in hand and exhausted, and found him as the battled raged on around him.

Without a second thought, I rushed towards him just in time to parry away an enemy sword before impaling its bearer and leaving him to die. Grabbing him by his arm, I tried helping him to his feet but his exhaustion weighed him down. I couldn't help him alone.

"C'mon, Kouen!" I yelled at him as I yanked at his arm so he could pull himself together. "Get up!"

At that instant, amidst the clashing of metal and dying screams, I heard a distinctive whistling. It was the sound of a blade rushing through air, cutting an invisible barrier of air as it swung down. And it was coming right from behind us, closest to Kouen. Before I could think, I yanked the boy away so he landed before my feet and turned meaning to parry the blow with my sword. But I'd mistaken it's trajectory and instead the blade slashed at my side, and I felt the warmth of my own blood sweep through my armor as I spun on my heel to stab the man through his throat. Injured, I fell to a knee, something shiny falling to my feet as I did so. I had no idea how deep the wound was but there was really no time to figure that out. Quickly as I could, I swiftly tightened the sash underneath my armor to stop what bleeding I could before grasping the hairpin that had fallen tightly in my hand and turning to Kouen.

The boy was still overexerted but was mildly more conscious than before. "Hurry," I hissed at him before helping him carry himself with one of his arms over my shoulder. The added weight almost made me double down in pain but I ignored it as best as I could and dragged him through the field where the battle still raged on. The hand I held the hairpin with was crushed against his side to keep him against me while my other held my sword still, swinging and clashing against anyone's blade that threatened us as we retreated.

It wasn't until I was far enough from combat that I finally saw Prince Hakuyuu. The instant our eyes met he rode his horse towards us and pulled Kouen onto it as I took a step back.

"Cael—"

"Leave with him, your highness!" I shouted as I turned back to the battlefield. Their numbers were significantly dwindling. This could be won if we only fought a bit longer. "We'll finish this."

Before he could say anything to me, I left and rushed out to the frontlines. I don't know for how long I kept killing men—I stabbed, I plunged, I parried, I mutilated—but I kept going until everything seemed to stop. It wasn't until I heard what few men remain call the ceasefire and our own apprehend them that I could finally breath again.

But it hurt to breath now.

An exuberant debility wracked my body and made me fall to my knees. The ground beneath me was hard as my whole body fell against it, my lungs hurting every time I inhaled. It felt like I was drowning.

"Cael!"

Whoever called my name sounded so far away. It wasn't until he came into view that I recognized Prince Hakuyuu. I don't recall what he did after—I recall hands touching me, carrying me off and then people coming in and out of my vision. But no matter what they did, it still hurt to breath.

Finally, nobody came. Only he stayed by my side as it became harder and harder to breath. As I held something in my hand, I felt it crack under the pressure of my grip.

 _The flower..._

"...Ceara…"

"Don't worry," I heard him say. A rare warmth fell upon my hand, the one where I held the hairpin, and contrasted greatly with the sudden cold that overcame me. "I'll see after her. I promise you that I'll see to Ceara's wellbeing, Cael. So it's alright..."

"...it's not...alright…" Talking hurt even more than I thought it would have. It made me cough violently and soon I could taste iron in my mouth. It was warm. "...I promised...always…"

But as I said those words my sight began to fade to black. Soon I couldn't even see shadows anymore. Soon I didn't feel cold. And then I started not being able to hear anything.

Strangely enough, I felt a warm hand stroking my head, brushing the hair back from my head, before I heard a woman's voice that echoed in my head. It was sweet and caring but it also sounded saddened.

It wasn't mom's. It wasn't Masami's. It wasn't yours.

I had never heard her before but I felt at ease hearing her voice.

" _It is fine, child. You have did what you could. All will now rest in her shoulders. So rest assured, your destiny will be hers now. She will carry on the torch and do what you could not."_

I didn't want that. I didn't want that weight on your small, fragile shoulders.

" _She will bear it wonderfully, child. Now sleep. You must be tired of it all."_

I was. And before I could fight it any longer, her warmth and voice left me and darkness took over.

* * *

 _ **VI. Another Time, Another Story**_

* * *

 _Different worlds equate to different tales where there are differences amongst what is known, what could have been, and what already has. As such, there exists one in particular and that is where this tale in particular takes place._

 _In this world there exist similarities to that other; Ceara of Eriu captured Murmur, conquering the 54th dungeon. She was still the cause of Reizei Kohaku's death. And she was discovered by the First Crown Prince, Ren Hakuyuu. But what differs also exists; Ren Hakuyuu shared this secret and burden with another, his oldest cousin, Ren Kouen. Ren Kouen vowed to the prince that he would uphold the girl's secret and help him undo the stigma she had created on herself. This promise was made out of duty, one he held after the rebellion and the emperor's and the two crown princes' murders._

 _Before they returned to Shika, Ren Kouen decided to undo the secret given to him, convincing the Reizei family to withdraw imperial punishment. Ceara of Eriu as a dungeon capturer was an asset that needed to be kept alive. Begrudgingly, they agreed to his terms. The Reizei left Ceara of Eriu behind and returned to Shika to hold the funeral of their second daughter._

 _In this tale, the twins never grew to love Ceara. Ceara also never suffered under the hand of Masami's abuse. She never searched for her brother's cause of death and thus never became infatuated with the culture and stories of her people. She also never captured Beleth or Marbas._

 _In this tale, she remained in Rakushou as one of Ren Kouen's retainers and member of his military. She still grew up amidst war but instead of commanding an army, she became part of the Western Subjugation Army. And she became closer to the First Prince faster than she would have otherwise._

 _And in this tale, something else occurred._

* * *

Ceara couldn't believe the lavishness that now decorated the receiving hall. She'd seen this place a thousand times and never had it been this adorned to the brim with fine silks or gold pieces of decor.

And all this to receive a king of the south. Not just any king, though, or so she was often hearing the maids say as the day drew nearer to his arrival. Oh no, this was the 'great man, conqueror of the seven seas and seven dungeons,' the king of the Kingdom of the Sindria, Sinbad.

Honestly, she understood that his visiting had a great deal to do with what Princess Kougyoku had sent word of. Apparently, he had delegated Balbadd into the Seven Seas Alliance's protection and thus his majesty had to deal with him coming to personally deliberate with Kou for Balbadd's release. As far as she was concerned, having any kind of talk about dealing Balbadd back to another country was idiotic. Not only had it fallen out of its own volition, it wasn't their fault that such a nosy person had stumbled into the princess' job of obtaining the damn country and made everything tumble down.

Now they had to put up pretenses and hold these luxurious parties that she hated with a passion. Crowds weren't her thing, much less when she was required to attend them since she was the only one remotely human in appearance out of all of the prince's retainers.

How she hated her position sometimes.

"Watcha doing, missy?"

Ceara didn't spare a glance at Seishun as he came over and placed his large hand on her head, bobbing it back and forth like a toy. "Trying to get used to this sight so I don't accidentally barf at it when I see it later tonight," she replied, taking his hand and stopping him before he accidentally popped her head out of her shoulders. "Seriously, Sei, why couldn't you have held back your assimilation by a couple of years? That way I wouldn't be dealing with this kind of crap on my own."

"You're still upset about that?" he asked.

"I'm not upset," she corrected, scrunching her nose in annoyance. "I'm just peeved."

"Same difference." He bobbed her head a couple of more times. "Be happy for me, missy. Unlike you that's had power similar to the young master's for so long, we don't have the luxury of time. Whatever power we get is for the young master's and Kou's sake."

"Mostly the former?"

"You know it," he cackled, smacking Ceara's back and, again, not controlling his strength and pushing her a few steps forward.

"Seishun! Miss Ceara!"

Chu'uun's shouts caught them off guard, making them turn to Prince Koumei's retainer as he strode into the room, the maids that had promptly ignored the two previously actually acknowledging him for a change.

"Afternoon, Chu'uun-san," Ceara greeted as Seishun reached out with his hand more than likely wanting to do the same thing to him that he was doing to her. Chu'uun smacked away Seishun's hand knowing how much it hurt since he still didn't have much control over the strength he used normally. Maybe she should learn from him.

"Hello, I'm sure you're—stop it, Seishun!—I'm sure you've readied yourself for the welcoming banquet?"

"Doing that as we speak," she pointed out. When he didn't seem to understand her idea, she sighed while Seishun snickered. Shaking her head, she gave him a smile. "Forget it. Yes, I am. I was told that their highnesses would be joining the welcoming banquet and that you and I would be accompanying them. I've pretty much got everything ready."

"Good." His smile for her faltered as he turned with a sneer to shout at Seishun. "Have you prepared for your duties tonight?"

The two bickering amongst themselves usually brought commotions that disrupted the servants so Ceara took the liberty of leading them out and instead walk around the palace as they talked about what would take place for the next three days.

Just thinking about it made Ceara sick.

"Oi, Brat of Eriu!"

"It's Ceara of Eriu!" she shouted back behind them as response to the idiotic nickname that Kin Gaku had given her. The giant boar of a man, another of Kouen's retainers, raised his hand and pointed out behind him as he reached the three of them.

"The young master called for you."

"Again?" Seishun asked before she could reply. Hating his nosiness, Ceara ignored him and nodded at Kin Gaku.

"Thanks. I'll meet up with him then. The library, I'm assuming?"

"Yeah."

With that affirmation, Ceara trotted away, ignoring the comments she overheard from Seishun about how much the young master had been calling her these past week. But as she thought about it, it wasn't really out of the norm. At least not for her.

When things got particularly stressful for him, there were few things that undid the strain he kept pent up. Reading was one of them. She was another. And like they had certainly noticed and pointed out, he'd been asking for her more than usual ever since word from Princess Kougyoku came that King Sinbad would visit Kou. Had the emperor not called the Western Subjugation Army back, neither of them would be suffering through this either. It was odd how things came to end up.

He'd never met the man to her knowledge, yet there was something explicitly unsaid about him from stories and the world at large that held an air of mystery around him. And this explicitness seemed to keep Kouen on his toes more than usual. He didn't like surprises, and that man was nothing but a big question mark for them all.

And frankly, she shared his anxiety, although on a more visible level than him. This was pretty obvious as she stumbled into the library, eyeing every corner of it as she went and noticing that it was as empty as could be except for the man that waited at the end of the large room. He sat behind his desk and held a scroll in his hands but was oddly distracted by something else. Ceara thought this extremely strange since Kouen wasn't one for reveries.

"You called for me, your highness?" Ceara asked loud enough to snap him out his stupor.

He didn't turn her way but she clearly saw the slight flinch when she spoke. Instead, he reached out his hand towards her without glancing back. Ceara sighed, knowing that he must be pretty out of it if he hadn't checked for any possible onlookers before doing that. Not worried since she checked herself though, she obliged and walked up to him before taking his hand in hers. Like he always did, he held tightly onto it before reaching to the small of her back to draw her closer as he pulled back from his chair.

Without a single word he laid his head on her stomach as his arm wrapped around her waist. Ceara rested her arms around his neck and brushed her fingers through his red hair waiting for some kind of response from him. When there was none, she opted to ask instead since she couldn't stand the silence.

"It's not like you to feel so wound up about things."

"I'm not."

"This is the eleventh time you called me over these past week." The thought itself made her chuckle. It's not like she was complaining or anything. She loved the time they spent together but this truly did show how much he was not okay about the situation. "And I know you don't call me just to talk."

"Don't I?" he asked, his hand traveling up from the small of her back to her shoulder blades and making a trail back down.

The ministrations made her glance back behind her shoulder before replying, "It's never _just_ to talk, Kouen. But if that's what you want then you know I'll listen. So talk to me."

"I don't want to talk because there's nothing wrong." Ceara blew the strands of hair away from her face. This man could be such a petulant child sometimes.

"No talking means I won't let you do anything to me. That's my condition, remember?"

The hand on her back stopped briefly before balling up the clothes on her back. Before she could chastise him for wrinkling them, he let go and stood from his chair towering over her and pinning her against the desk.

"I don't _need_ to talk, of Eriu."

His false machismo didn't get her to falter or fold and she glared back at him. "Then you're not having me, Ren."

"Why are you being so difficult?"

"Why are you being such a child?"

That jab made his jaw clench and Ceara saw quickly how his previous anxiety had turned into annoyance for her. She wasn't going to let herself be pushed around just because he was throwing a tantrum, though. They made a deal and she intended for him to keep his end.

"You said you're a man of your word, didn't you?" she asked, wanting to reiterate her point from before. Reaching behind her, she pulled his hand away from her back so that it rested on the wooden desk behind her before crossing her arms in front of her chest. "Then speak. You're not touching me otherwise."

A minute then two went by where a tense silence came over them as they stared each other down. Finally and like always, he caved. His head fell so that his forehead rested on her shoulder and Ceara didn't protest but did keep her hands to herself while waiting for him to speak. And eventually, he did.

"I hate these frivolous affairs."

"That makes two of us."

"What I abhor most, though, is that he dragged us away from the battlefield for something as insignificant as this."

Oh, his father. Now that he was complying, Ceara reached out and wrapped her arms around his shoulders before resting her cheek against the side of his head. "Well, you're not wrong to feel that. What you're doing for this country is very important."

"And he's an idiot for not realizing that. All he sees is power to garner. Not the future that they saw."

All at once, Ceara understood exactly what had Kouen in such an awful mood and just how wrong she'd been. He wasn't anxious at all about King Sinbad's arrival. He was exasperated because his father didn't see the great future his role models had, the same one he and his brothers saw, and the same one he would give anything to accomplish.

Ceara found out long ago that Kouen detested his father but out of respect and position held his tongue. He had always loved his mother—rest her sweet and kind soul—and Ren Hakutoku had been the only actual father figure he had accepted. As far as she knew, Ren Koutoku was only their father biologically and in name. But Ceara couldn't see that. She couldn't fathom how such a horrid man could father such kind and candid children.

"It doesn't matter what he thinks," Ceara assured him in a quiet whisper. Her fingers brushed through his hair again, this time to calm him down. "You're the one endeavoring for that goal. There's a reason their legacy was left to you and Koumei but not him. You're the future of Kou and you're making their ideal a reality everyday you fight. You've been fighting for years and once these three days are over and Balbadd remains ours, you will have been the one to unite the whole of the eastern continent. You will have ended the wars of half of the world. After such seemingly unfathomable feat achieved, conquering the west won't be a dream. It's a possibility we will make happen." Unable to help herself, Ceara pressed her lips against the side of his head. "And three days away won't change that."

He didn't reply to any of what she said and instead remained there, breathing deeply against her shoulder.

"Three days is all it'll be."

"Exactly," she agreed, "then we'll be able to continue. It's a small pause. That's all."

"Do you tire of fighting?"

The question caught her off guard. "Me?" When he didn't answer, Ceara thought about it for a moment. It wasn't like it was hard to fight. She had Murmur, after all. At times maybe she tired of seeing so much bloodshed and death but she knew that it was for the betterment of the world. That gave her some peace in order to keep going.

At telling him this, he took a deep breath and exhaled, the hot air tickling her neck as he moved to lay his face against her exposed neck. "Is that and all _this_ worth it for you? Being used and losing everything for this."

The reminder he spoke of made her pause.

Her life after Prince Hakuyuu's death had surely been one of havoc. The Reizei had forsaken her—a deed she didn't blame them for—and the country after having asked for her execution but being denied because of her value. Denied at least for now; the execution was more prolonged than anything. The emperor had promised her execution after the conquer. It wasn't like she didn't hold resentment for them either. She hated General Koujiro for causing her brother's death. So in reality, they were equal on that end.

Now that she had grown part of the Imperial family's cadre, she found where she was needed. She belonged as a soldier for their cause. And what's more, she found some solace in this odd relationship they had. Although a secret for so many years, Ceara liked to think that it was real. That he actually desired her aside from her body and the release he found in it. That he actually felt something else for her, the same thing she felt ever since he took her in after being exiled with no home to return to. She didn't know if what she felt was love; the only thing close to it she'd ever felt had been with Kohaku. That had been but child's play compared to now. But even so, Ceara kept quiet about it. Instead she took her place as his paramour—one of many, she was certain—and came to be at peace with the fact that she could help him with at least this much.

"I don't think I can give any real answer to that. At least not until it all ends and I kneel before the executioner's blade. It's only in the end when we realize what we regret most, no?"

"Then what do you regret now? There must be something."

There was, but telling him the one thing she regretted not saying every second she was by his side wouldn't change anything. So instead of telling the truth, she smiled and lifted his face to meet his eyes. "Just that I can't relieve you of all your problems. I'm here because of you; to do whatever I can to make sure you accomplish that great ideal you wish for is really all that I want. So right now, there isn't really much to regret about."

But when Ceara saw that he was mulling over her words way too much, she didn't let him think for long. Instead she pressed her lips against his and took his mind away from the conversation. As his hands began to roam her backside, they lifted her to sit on the desk before he pressed his body between her parted legs.

As they parted for air, he put attention on her neck to bite it. Before her mind could get clouded over by the pleasure that would soon take over her, she whispered, "What if someone barges in?"

"They won't," he breathed against her skin, "I specifically told them not to let anybody contact me until the banquet."

"That's five hours from now."

"It appears we have a long five hours ahead of us then." Ceara couldn't think of anything to answer him with as baffling as that idea was. But as he undid the thin sash that held her clothes together and used it to tie her wrists together above her head, a part of her couldn't help but shiver in anticipation of what she knew was to come. So much pleasure, so much pain.

"Try to be quiet this time."

* * *

Damn him.

Five hours had not been a good idea. Ceara could not, for the life of her, keep standing for more than a few minutes. Kouen hadn't been kidding about the timeslot he'd opened, and because of how long they took to leisure, they had barely gotten enough time to ready and appear for the banquet. And because she'd gotten no time to rest from the plethora, albeit pleasureable, positions he'd put her through, her body was still strung and sore. Especially her legs. And it was getting really hard to keep up appearances as guests were coming in since she was the one that had to stand around while Kouen and Koumei lounged beside their father.

Damn it all.

Thankfully, she somehow managed to keep it together to welcome the guests. It was almost over. There was just one more person to greet. King Sinbad walked into the room with a small but substantial entourage behind him. Watching him walk into the room was odd in a way. His presence parted the crowd and silenced the room like a ray of sun straight through clouds.

Mesmerizing pools of gold stared at them as he strode forward and came to stand before the emperor and the two Imperial princes. Chu'uun and Ceara stayed steps behind their respective masters but she couldn't keep her curiosity from winning over her which made her peek up from her bow.

The high king greeted them respectfully and with a grand smile on his face as they began to speak. All the while, Ceara couldn't help the ill omen that fell upon her at his presence. He appeared charismatic, also boyish despite being almost in his thirties from what she was told.

It was magnetic. It demanded attention. And Ceara felt an overwhelming sense of foreboding from the man. One that she couldn't quite explain.

Thankfully, over the span of the banquet, she didn't have to interact with the king or be near him. The negotiations would take place in the morrow; so the banquet was all about welcoming him and his. It wasn't until the night was almost over that she had to step away from the room when she felt she couldn't stand a minute longer. Excusing herself and asking Chu'uun to please take over for a few minutes, Ceara stepped out of the room and went towards the outer gardens that were far from the party but near enough for her to hear if she were needed. On the edge of the hallway, she sat herself down on the ledge and let out a heavy sigh as she massaged her hips and thighs.

For as much as she loved the man, Ceara knew how childish possessive Kouen could get without even noticing it himself. She guessed that it was that same trait of his that made him so harsh with her at times. Thanking the chilliness of fall for cooling her aching body, Ceara closed her eyes and enjoyed the fresh air away from the wine and festivity.

"I never imagined a cold night could be this lovely."

The deep, rich voice that came through the air to her made Ceara jump in her skin and literally jump as she hurried to stand back up. But as sore as her legs were, she stumbled on the first couple of steps, her knees effectively buckling like a deer's and gravity intent on seeing her fall took its course. Instead of a hard and cold floor, however, Ceara felt strong arms hold her steady by her own before helping her stand back up straight. Once her feet were well and firmly planted on the ground, Ceara gazed upward from the floor and took in the complete view of her rescuer.

Despite the embers of the garden lanterns being the only light in the night, Ceara could not misplace the molten gold that she stared into. King Sinbad smiled at her, finding himself able to stand face to face with her.

"Are you alright, my lady?"

The foul sense from before sent shivers down her spine again but this time because of his proximity. Wanting to put some distance between themselves, Ceara pulled away and took two steps back. "Yes, thank you for helping me, your majesty."

"There isn't a need to thank me. All I did was give help where it was needed. It's what anybody would do after all."

"Even so," she added, not wanting to be seen as insubordinate towards their guest, "your kindness is appreciate towards a lowly servant as myself."

At hearing this, King Sinbad stood back with his arms crossed over his chest, the smile never disappearing from his face as he simply stared at her. If he'd given a sense of foreboding before, now he was simply being creepy. But as those golden eyes scanned her, Ceara couldn't resist feeling like another shiny decoration in that receiving hall that was being ogled at. Thinking that seriously creeped her out to the point that it made her speak.

"Is something the matter, your majesty?"

"Nothing at all," he assured her as that boyish grin appeared on his face before he let out a coy chuckle. The moment his eyes met hers, though, Ceara knew that he was lying. "Just that I don't believe a mere servant would be a retainer of the First Imperial Prince of Kou."

Shit. She'd taken for granted her assumed invisibility in the party; Ceara guessed that among the crowd, nobody would be the wiser and would simply think of her as just another maid or servant. Clearly, that hadn't worked with him. He noticed. No, he was observant.

Maybe that's what made her so uneasy about his presence. Those irises of molten gold always attentive, always observing. Although subtle, the scrutiny was palpable on her skin. That just made her all the more cautious about what she said.

"I serve his highness personally. That is the reason of my accompanying him tonight. That's all."

"Is that so? Then would this lovely lady care to accompany me around the palace? A tour would be highly appreciated."

"I don't believe that's a possibility, King Sinbad." This time it wasn't her uneasiness speaking. Even if she wanted—and she really did not—her accessibility of the palace was limited because of her situation. She couldn't go as she pleased unless she was accompanied. But instead of telling him this, Ceara smiled amicably, wanting to portray the same confidence he did to save face after how they'd met. "The banquet is being held for you, after all. I don't believe leaving would be a wise decision. His majesty, the emperor, must be searching for you as we speak. I shall take you back inside."

"I came out here to take a breath of fresh air." After their long standstill, King Sinbad stepped aside and faced the gardens that were so dimly illuminated by the lanterns that ran along the hallways. "I have to admit that Kou does not appear as hostile as many proclaim it to be."

"It isn't." Ceara pursed her lips the second after those words escaped her. She knew better than to answer but she wouldn't let falsehoods from gossip smear the image of her home. "Kou is a grand country. It's people are happy and cared for."

"It appeared so when I arrived here. That is aside from the slaves."

Ceara didn't find his comment the least bit surprising. Many outsiders questioned Kou's methods which included their inclusion of slavery and of their continued conquest west. But having heard the argument far too many times, she already had a reply for him.

"It's a much more humane system than most I have encountered."

"It is a system nonetheless, don't you agree?"

"A necessary one for the time being."

"That's regrettable." His gaze turned from the gardens back to Ceara who kept her gaze averted from his. "Where you part of that system, my lady? Perhaps a slave bought."

"I've never been chained to nobody's whim. It's of my own volition that I serve the Imperial Family." Partially true. Circumstances had certainly brought her where she was but it was by choice that she remained.

"My apologies then. I did not mean to offend you."

"You didn't."

"Excuse my imprudence and crudeness when I ask if then perhaps you are a consort—"

"I don't excuse it." She gasped when her words escaped her again. Her mind and heart begin to fight against each other as she spoke, trying to clean up what she'd done. "I mean—I'm sorry, what I meant to say… I didn't mean to be so rude."

Despite her apologies, she didn't regret calling him out like that. She didn't want to be called that word. She hated it...simply because it was the one truth she didn't want to admit. She didn't want to admit that this was in fact only one-sided from her part.

All those thoughts fled her mind though when King Sinbad reached out to take her hand in his before bringing it up to cover it tenderly with his other as he held it daintily between them. Her eyes gazed at his face that had now changed; instead of the coquettish smile, he wore a grimace that showed utter repentance.

"It was I that was rude, my lady. I should not have asked such vulgar and inappropriate thing from such a gracious woman as yourself. Would you accept the humblest of apology of this idiotic man?"

She couldn't say no. There was no room for such answer. When she accepted the apology, King Sinbad smiled and without warning lifted her hand and placed a kiss on the back of it. As he lifted his head, she could see his golden eyes watching her from underneath his eyelashes and felt her face grow warmer.

"If it's not much to ask, could I have your name, my lady? I would be delighted to know what lovely name belongs to such beautiful woman."

Pretty words and romanticisms like those were things she'd never heard before. And despite knowing that this could all very well be a ruse, a part of her felt delighted at hearing those kind of things. A few seconds passed as she was left somewhat speechless but before she could blurt out her name, another voice, one with a deeper timbre that she recognized all too well, came through.

"Ceara."

Instinctively, she drew away from King Sinbad, placing a good distance between them. But apparently that wasn't enough as Kouen strode straight to them and effectively placed himself in front of King Sinbad to have her behind himself.

There wasn't any speaking after he called her name. Instead the two men seemed to be sizing each other up in utter silence. Thankfully the awkward silence was cut when two men she didn't recognize trotted up to King Sinbad and scolded him for leaving the banquet hall. The man finally tore his eyes away from Kouen and apologized to his retainers. When this happened, Kouen glanced over his shoulders to Ceara who stepped back sensing a odd annoyance coming from him.

The two Sindrian retainers weren't the only ones though. Prince Koumei and Chu'uun had closely followed behind them and came to Kouen and Ceara. Apparently, the emperor and the Sindrian retainers had noticed the disappearance of their guest and the emperor had asked his sons to search for him.

"Guess it's time to return then." He asked for their forgiveness at being inconvenienced because of him to which Prince Koumei replied that they hadn't been. Not true, obviously, but what else could he say.

Just when Ceara thought that at last the odd and uncomfortable encounter was over, she felt a tight grip around her wrist just as Kouen hid it behind his back before turning to his brother. "Tell his majesty I'll be returning to my quarters."

Prince Koumei eyed him curiously but nodded all the same. King Sinbad wasn't that oblivious to what Kouen said, however, and did turn back at hearing him say that. "You'll be leaving us, Prince Kouen?"

"Yes. My brother will accompany his majesty in welcoming you for what remains of the night."

"Unfortunate but it's not something to complain about." His eyes traveled from Kouen to Ceara and that sent a shiver down her spine as he flashed that boyish grin of his one last time as he waved her way. "It was very nice meeting you, Lady Ceara. May we meet again."

She cringed at the tinge of pain that ran up her wrist. It wasn't until they turned the corner that Kouen finally let go of her wrist. As she rubbed it from the soreness left from the tight grip, Ceara watched Kouen stride away towards his room. Dutifully, she followed and when they got to his room and he began to rid himself of his gaudy attire, Ceara could tell that he was indeed very much annoyed about something.

"Are you alri—"

"Don't ask." But the fact that he was mulling over it while pacing around his chambers told her that he wasn't.

"Look, I was just out for five minutes. I wanted to sit down and rest my legs. They were hur—"

"And he just happened to find you there?"

"Yes," she agreed, quickly starting to get peeved herself from the line of questions. He was framing this like it was her fault. "He told me he wanted some air and had come out. I offered to take him back but he refused me."

"What else did he tell you?"

At remembering what that conversation had been, she felt her face warm up again. "He asked questions. I didn't answer with anything specific. I was as vague as I could manage to be. I know that that man isn't any good news but I was trying to be polite so as not to cause you any trouble."

That answer only got him to scoff. "You couldn't have been more naive had you tried."

Finally fed up and tired of his attitude, Ceara reacted on her mounting anger and tackled him against his bed. Because he was so close to it, her shove managed to push the back of his knees against the edge of the bed making them buckle. Kouen fell back but caught himself enough to lift the upper part of his body just in time to meet Ceara's glare as she straddled him.

"You getting yourself worked up like this isn't like you and it's getting fucking old. So get over whatever you think happened because all I did was be polite and that idiot did whatever he wanted. I couldn't kick or punch him but believe me that I would've with how uncomfortable I was in that situation. So before you start talking and being almighty about what you think happened and how much of a moron you think I am because I let it happen, how about you stop to think about how fucking scared I was to be with a man that I didn't like from the second I laid eyes on him!"

Winded from the long speech she gave, Ceara took a second to take a breath and calm herself. The times she exploded like that were few. She often kept her cool when it was needed but there were things that existed that if done right could easily push her over the edge.

In spite of her feelings for him, Ceara had to admit that Kouen himself was one of those things that could push her right over that point. And because she had been good enough to keep everything pent up, this was a first for her.

Before she could completely calm down though Kouen sat up from the bed almost making her fall back. Both her arms reached out and wrapped around his neck instinctively while surprisingly his arm reached behind her to grab onto her waist and keep her in place.

Kouen lifted his gaze and finally met hers, his stoic expression telling her nothing of what his state of mind was after that outburst of hers.

"You were scared to be there?"

Still a little peeved, Ceara didn't falter with the truth despite being uncomfortable about it still. "It's stupid, I know, but I don't know why he makes me feel so uneasy. I didn't like being before him. Alone."

"Why?"

"I felt bare. Like he was looking right through me yet still at me. Like I couldn't think. The way he spoke—how he toyed with me with only a few sentences—really bothered me."

When she told him this, Kouen helped get her off of himself and sat her next to him at the edge of the bed. "What else?" Ceara felt like he was much calmer than before and because of it, she was also more relaxed. With that peace of mind, she told him what had occurred and he only listened attentively. He didn't question, just listened. When she was done, he took a deep breath that he easily let go of. "You did as well as you could have been expected to." Without warning, he brushed a finger roughly across her cheek but far more tenderly that he would have otherwise, she noted.

He let out a sigh and stood as he began to busy himself with whatever he found in his room. "I'll be retiring for the night. You should as well. We still have two more days of this to deal with." When she didn't move, Kouen turned to her and raised a curious eyebrow.

Pursing her lips, Ceara took a sharp inhale before standing up to speak. "Is it fine...if I stay here with you for the night?" Her hands that laid by her side took a tight hold of her skirts as her askance gaze came to meet his. "And just to be here, not for...anything else."

Oh the courage it took her to say those words. This was a relationship kept secret for a reason; as much as she hated to admit it, it was one of pure sexual desire. By its truest definition, she was nothing but a paramour to the prince. It was out of carnal pleasure for him, a destresser for when he fell to his lows. And unbeknownst to him, for Ceara it was simply a pleasure. Both carnal and amourous. But after having met such a man whose mere actions left a sourness to her, Ceara didn't want to return to a lone, cold room. She wanted his image and the feelings he elicited to go away, and she only knew one person who made her forget about the world.

But she also knew that because of the nature of their relationship that she had asked a fruitless question. There was no way he would—

"It's fine by me."

Amazed by his answer, she could do no more than blink at him. But when he swiftly told her to ready herself for bed since he truly was going to rest himself, Ceara snapped out of her stupor and did as she was told. It was strange to share his bed, to say the least. All their endeavors had always been during the day or late at night when she could scurry back to her room unnoticed. Not staying behind in his quarters had been an unspoken rule that came to be out of caution. Now Ceara couldn't believe that it was actually happening. All the same, however, she couldn't sleep.

Not like sleep ever came easy for her. Not for the past decade.

"Are you cold?"

His quiet voice still reverberated despite the low volume and made Ceara turn to face him. It'd been just twenty minutes since they blew out the candles and because he faced away from the far window to the gardens, his face remained obscured from her sight.

"No." She chuckled under her breath and scrunched her nose. "People are warm. You're no different. Your being so close keeps me warm enough."

"Then why do you quiver?"

"Habit." It wasn't a lie. Ceara couldn't keep neither her body nor mind free of the cold that crept and inhabited her body. It was as if the terrible ghosts of her past itself—one she kept hidden even from him—kept her company. Certainly, she was never alone. They weren't the best of companions, however, especially when all they did was made her feel cold inside. "I...don't sleep very well. Never have."

He didn't reply to that but he did reach out his arm to pull her closer to him. Abashed but letting him nonetheless, Ceara buried herself in the warmth of his skin so close to his. It was warmer and yet she could feel herself shaking. Kouen told her to try and sleep, stroking her back as he did. Wanting to rest and comply, she closed her eyes and simply focused on the sound of his beating heart.

Amazingly the sound made her drowsy, like the tolling of far off bells muffled by the distance, and soon she felt herself heavy. And for once she relished in the feeling of sleeping in peace.

* * *

 _Almost a year and a half later, the battle against the Medium in Magnostadt occurred. Kohaku was released but Ceara, unable to face her and with no promise to give about telling anybody the truth of who she was, never faced her. In this tale, she simply allowed the souls to leave Murmur's lantern in peace._

 _In this tale, Parisa Klados remained to fight in Magnostadt. At age fifteen, she was one of the many magicians that perished against Reim's forces. In this tale, Seijin remained a slave and would eventually finish his five years of servitude to later leave Kou and travel the eastern seas towards Kina._

 _Without him, Ceara of Eriu joined Prince Kouen and his retainers in their travels to the Summit. There she heard Aladdin's story and there she met Rakah Azeri for the first and last time._

* * *

"You're quite the storyteller, Aladdin! Had me quite hooked from beginning to end." Rakah couldn't help but watch as all those present turned towards him as he sat perched on the northern wall of the dilapidated building. He jumped off of his perch and hovered gracefully on the ground with use of his magic. His gelid amethyst eyes landed on the young magi as a grin came to his lips. "But you always forget to tell our little tale. How bizarre that is, don't you think?"

Aladdin's was not fazed by this accusation and instead held no expression in the least that he could read. "That story isn't mine to tell, Mister Rakah. It's yours."

That comment made him snicker and grin at the boy. "That's too bad then. I don't think it's a story that's worth telling since they all end the same eventually." Rakah couldn't help but give a faint glance over to little Speirr as she stood close to the faction she turned to most, if not all, of the time, the Kou Empire. And he did indeed recall every iteration where she was concerned. "In one they laugh and dance, in another they scream and flee. But no matter the contents, a story that always ends the same isn't compelling. But that's why I want to change it."

"And how do you intend to do that?" he asked. Rakah could hear Aladdin's hesitation. The boy was ever cautious with him ever since they met in Magnostadt, no matter the world.

"By balancing the scales." His latest theory. "Too much power on one side and the knowledge of it seems to be a common factor to the downfall of at least one of us. Usually hers." At saying this, Rakah came to meet Ceara's gaze, her eyes widening as if realizing his insinuation. "I've found that powerlessness and isolation are good for sowing and reaping greed. But no matter where I look, she's always accompanied by one or another. It's proven relatively hard to find her alone." He returned to face Aladdin as he gave a shrug at what that implicated, "So I figured..."

Lifting his hand towards her, Rakah directed his open palm there and felt the surge of power at summoning Peaceful Darkness. Dark spheres were a pain to create. Thankfully after years and years of practicing, Rakah managed to quickly form one in the midst of the Kou crowd that took the left side of the summit's room. Volatile spaces of nothingness, they were easier to mold than to create and making them explode into shards was easy for him.

Killing those pesky princes would be child's play...or so he had thought. Rakah could've sworn he had accounted for every mistake with the countless times he'd gone through this same scenario. But Ceara proved to be ever the surprise to him. The foolish woman did what he never expected her to and took the full brunt of the shattering sphere, covering it with her whole body. Although it didn't stop some from spreading outward, she took the majority of the attack, the dark shards of matter piercing her body at random.

The crowd shocked, it was Kouen's sudden shout for her that made Rakah react. Using a piece of Grace of Sunlight's magic, he teleported her body to him and caught it in his arms, the sudden dead weight bringing him down to a knee. People from all sides sprinted at him clearly intent on attacking him but with a swift wave of his hand, Rakah summoned the the roaring winds of Rondo of Whirlwind to keep them at bay.

The sudden choking he heard in his arms brought his attention back to Ceara as she half sat up against his arm. Having used the other gifts took away from his control of Peaceful Darkness effectively making the dark shards disappear. Her wounds unfettered, they began to bleed profusely and he finally saw the extent of her injuries. A good portion to her abdomen and chest had been pierced; it amazed him how she was still conscious trying desperately to breath. No doubt was she in terrible pain because of it. And aside from being numerous, the wounds were large; they would be difficult to heal if at all and it would certainly take time for her to bleed out.

Killing her now would be a blessing.

"I've always hated your damn bleeding heart," he muttered under his breath as he reached out his free hand to lay it on the side of her head. He was about to summon more magic when he gasped at the tight grip that she managed to get on his arm. Even with how slowly and painfully she was dying, she still managed to fight. This brought an uncharacteristic smile to his lips compared to the grim scene before him. Leaning closer to her ear, Rakah shushed her soothingly. "It'll be alright, Speirr. It won't hurt for much longer." Using water magic, he managed to wet the top side of her head well enough. Knowing the charge he needed would be pretty big, Rumble of Thunder was the safest bet to do her in quickly. He didn't want to risk having to electrocute her twice. Feeling a pang in his chest, Rakah soothingly stroke her soaked head as her breathing became even heavier to distract the two of them.

 _Just do it._

The surge of electricity ran through his body into her head, the shock making her body convulse and stiffen. Rakah held her tightly while not letting his hand off of her head for a good minute. He wanted to be sure one time would be enough. When he relented, her body relaxed and her head fell heavily against his shoulder, her noisy breathing stopping completely. Rakah placed his fingers against her neck to reassure himself that her heart wasn't beating. His heart never failed to sink whenever she died.

This time was no different. Unable to keep the winds of Rondo of Whirlwind up any longer, he let them fall. Strangely nobody moved from their place. Rakah didn't either but for a different reason. He felt no pool of energy, no weight being added to his already aching shoulders and soul. She hadn't released her seal in this world either.

The heaviness of his heart became greater at realizing she had yet again died in vain.

"I'm sorry, Speirr," he whispered against her head before laying a small kiss on it. His hand came from her neck up to her eyes and carefully closed them. Once done, he stood from his place while carrying her body and came closer to the people that waited with bated breaths. Rakah couldn't understand their calm. He laid her gently on the floor and as he did watched as her head fell to their side, showing them her face. If he didn't know any better, he'd think her asleep.

Rakah didn't understand how out of the lot of them it was only Ceara that always seemed to leave so peacefully.

He stepped back after that and once he was sufficiently far away, the first one to reach her and take her body was that damn first prince of Kou. Of course he checked her, and of course he soon realized what he'd done.

A fury marred the usually stoic prince's face as he stood with her body in his arms. "Kill the bastard."

"I would think better of it if I were you," he warned as soon as he saw the retainers heeding their prince's orders. They stopped briefly as if taking his threat seriously but more than likely because of the ice pillars he conjured with Blooming Waves to keep them away from him. He didn't feel like fighting this time.

"Why...?" Aladdin's question made him turn to face the young magi that expressed the sadness Rakah felt in himself. "She didn't have to die. So why..."

"I didn't mean to. Believe me, my target wasn't her. She just put herself in the way like she's always done." He grimaced and brushed his hand through his hair, "But in retrospect, I think it's better that she died here."

"How can you say that?!" Rakah never understood how Alibaba always felt like he could poke his nose into business that didn't concern him. Nonetheless, he answered.

"Believe me, Saluja, there were a thousand worse ways she could've gone." Man, did he know that was true. Giving them a grim smile, he glanced at the ground as he spoke the sour truth. "This was the only mercy I knew of to give her."

Without warning, he used Grace of Sunlight to open a portal. There wasn't anything left to do here anyway with Ceara not being a part of the world. No Ceara meant no gift. So onward to the next one it was. But as he took one step into the teleportation circle, he glanced over his shoulder towards the first prince. The man still held onto her body tightly but if he stared long enough, he could see just how much he was trying to hide his trembling hands.

 _She's never alone. She's always with you._

And how he hated that.

"Give her a good funeral." With that said, he stepped through the portal and left that world behind.

* * *

 _ **VII. Towards the Future**_

* * *

The spring was a beautiful season for Kou. It was the season when mother nature took over their fertile soils and let their crops flourish for the most profitable trade of the year. It was the season for many festivities which had only over the last decade prevailed in Kou as the true nature of its culture itself blossomed. And like everything else, the young girl that watched over the gardens from the window of the library was reaching the ripe age of eleven.

Such beauty, such allure. How Chie abhorred its banality.

The youngest of her family, Ren Kouchie was but a few weeks away from her eleventh birthday, and as such there was much to look forward to. Ever since her eldest sister Kohaku turned that age and asked for a special gift from their parents, it became a custom for each child to ask for one big gift when they turned eleven.

Haku-nee asked to be trained in swordsmanship by their father. He obliged happily.

Yuu-nii asked to join their uncles and aunt to the political assemblies they attended monthly with other countries. Their parents asked and were granted permission.

Rei and Sei asked to remain home and help their Uncle Kouha with the people. Of course their uncle said yes.

But as her birthday approached, Chie saw that no matter how much she wanted to voice her request, she felt like she couldn't. There was no way she could ask for such a thing. It would break their parents' hearts. But there wasn't really anything else she wanted.

Completely torn, Chie ruffled her red hair out of frustration before slamming her forehead against the book she was reading. "Ow..." Her muffled groaned barely came out. She lifted her head and rubbed the sore spot before laying her face to the side to glance outside to the gardens again, her large, red eyes staring faintly back at her from the reflection on the pane of glass.

It wasn't like she didn't like her country. Kou was beautiful and she would always love it. She spent the early years of her life exploring it and finding joy in each thing she discovered. But Kou was only so big and after four years, she had exhausted every mystery there was.

 _What I want is to explore the world._

But asking her parents for such a thing—asking them to essentially let her leave on her own at such age—was too much. She knew their parents loved them and would go to great lengths to see them happy but this? Chie doubted it'd be possible. Even with the relative peace in the world, she knew that there were many things nobody knew about, especially in the Dark Continent even after so many years. There were unknowns out there and people feared that which they didn't know. To them, mysteries were scary, but in her case, they excited her to no end.

Kou was home because it was safe. And Chie knew that safety for them was what mattered most to her mom and dad. Especially to her mom.

She couldn't ask.

 _But what if...?_

Chie couldn't keep herself from wondering that over the past days. What if they actually agreed? The dichotomy of her thoughts exhausted her. She didn't want to read anymore. Reading about the outside was not the same. But as she exited the library, a thought came to her. Maybe her siblings would be able to enlighten her. Maybe they would know whether or not their parents would accept such thing.

Certainly they would. And since the easiest to find was her older sister, Chie headed straight for the barracks.

* * *

"Explore the world?"

Chie nodded when her eldest sister at eighteen repeated her query, mulling over it as she stood a few feet in front their cousin whom she'd been training. Kohaku struck her sword onto the ground to lean on the hilt as she closed her eyes to think. Chie made sure to stay several steps away from the training circle drawn on the floor, one that their cousin, Izumi, currently stood at the borders of, utterly exhausted.

Izumi was their oldest cousin at twelve and son of their Uncle Sou. The scrawny boy had their uncle's complexion and caramel hair while keeping their Aunt Risa's silver eyes. Despite his small size, Izumi wanted to learn to wield a sword masterfully like her sister did. He wanted to make his father proud and learn what he had at his age. Chie saw the potential in him just like Kohaku had when their uncle asked her to tutor him. And since Chie knew her sister would never turn down a chance to fight and exercise, she took the request gladly.

"Is Izu-nii gonna get his butt kicked again?"

Chie couldn't help but chuckle at little Sachi's comment. Her large silver doe-eyes stared up at Chie as their youngest cousin stood in front of her snuggled again her to spectate. Unlike Izumi, Sachi was the spitting image of Aunt Risa, magical affinity and all. "Probably."

Seeing a chance to ambush Kohaku, Izumi rushed back into the circle with his sword held high and ready to strike. Snapping out of her thoughts, Kohaku took her sword back from the ground and simply sidestepped Izumi and trotted behind him to smack the back of his knees with the flat side of the steel. Because he was caught so unawares, Izumi fell to the ground, half way through the circle they weren't suppose to cross.

"Well, I don't see why they would say no, frankly speaking," she replied as she slung her sword over her shoulder. "Dad explored the world to conquer it years ago and Mom joined him for it. At least that's what they and Uncle Ryuu have told me. They've been to almost half of the world and over. I don't see why they wouldn't let you go when they have."

Sachi tugged at Chie's arms, catching her attention. "Are you gonna go away Chie-nee?"

"I don't know yet." She didn't want to lie to Sachi. The girl adored her and Kohaku and they tended well to their youngest cousin whenever they could. "But let's keep it a secret for now, okay?" Chie placed a finger against her lips and quietly shushed her. Playfully copying her, Sachi giggled and mimicked her gesture. Turning back to Kohaku as she once again brought Izumi down, Chie pursed her lips. "But weren't they not real fans of Yuu-nii when he asked for his gift."

"Sure." Kohaku shrugged her shoulders to make a point but quickly turned to Izumi just in time to parry his attack and somehow managed to disarm him in the process. She gave him some pointers before returning the blade and standing inside of the circle. "But I think that was more because he was joining Aunt Gyoku and Uncle Ryuu and Mei in politics that neither of them really like." The mere thought of the meetings her brother Yuu partook in made Kohaku shiver. "Honestly, I'll never know what fun he sees in attending those assemblies."

Chie didn't add or give her opinion. Instead she stuck with the idea that at least Kohaku thought their parents reasonable enough to think about her proposal.

"Hey, if you're that worried about it, let me finish here with Izumi and I'll come with you to ask them."

"Thanks, Haku-nee, but I think I have to do this on my own." For as much as she loved her mom and dad, Chie knew that they could be really scary when angry or upset. Each in their own right. And as sisters, she appreciated that Kohaku saw this restlessness in asking for such huge thing. But she hadn't been kidding when she said this was something to be done alone.

"Were you planning on asking Yuu too?" Chie nodded which made Kohaku stop for a second as she thought about it. "I think he's at the council room since the meetings are gonna start soon."

"I'll go ask for his opinion in this then. Thank you, Haku-nee."

"Good luck, Chie!" she called as both she and Sachi waved at her retreating back. Before Izumi could ambush her again, Kohaku easily stepped aside and threw him onto the ground. "Don't make so much noise, Izumi! Again!"

Sachi clapped as she took back her sit on the floor. "Go, Izu-nii!"

* * *

"Absolutely not. Are you mad?"

Well, that certainly was not the answer she expected from him. Despite being only a year younger than Kohaku, Yuu was as much if not smarter than their sister. Chie often heard their mom and relatives compare them to their father and Uncle Mei. Till this day, she didn't see what they meant.

Being so knowledgeable, Chie knew her brother to be an honest person. Almost brutally so. Case in point: the answer he just gave her at asking the same question she asked Kohaku.

"Why though?"

"Mother and Father, despite how much they work alongside the rest of the countries, aren't particularly fond of the unknown lands. Even after fifteen years, there's still much to learn and explore in those kinds of places."

"With all the more reason!" Chie groaned knocking her head against the bookshelf closest to her. "Ow." Groaning, this time out of the pain, she rubbed her forehead. Yuu shook his head and smiled grimly before taking his hand away from the book he read and reaching out to rub the sore spot with her.

"You seriously need to stop doing that."

"Don't change the subject."

"I'm not," he corrected before returning to his ledger. "But what I say is true. When I asked to join our auntie and uncles at the assemblies, you have no idea the earful that I got from both of them. The world outside Kou may seem fascinating but it's flawed and despite how much we put into keeping the peace, there are a still a lot of natural forces that we aren't aware of. Having no knowledge of the unknown and still diving head first into it isn't prudent, Chie. In fact, it's stupid."

"You're stupid," she mumbled under her breath.

Yuu sighed at her childishness. "You're barely turning eleven too. Letting me go outside was okay in the end because I was accompanied. You wouldn't be."

"I can find people to travel with. I'm certain I can."

"What then? Do you even know the first thing about survival tactics or anything like that?" Chie opened her mouth to speak but had no chance to when Yuu interrupted her. "Of course you don't. I know exactly the lesson plans father and Uncle Mei give us. There's so much you'd need to learn."

"But I can learn it! I don't need to leave this exact moment. I just want to be able to leave and explore as I wish."

"Then wait till you grow older."

"I may have said not 'this exact moment' but I didn't mean years from now either!" she chastised, punching Yuu on the arm.

He languidly rubbed at his arm, telling her to stop it before he shook his head. "Then it's really up to what they'll say. You have to ask."

She really felt like she shouldn't. Asking for such huge gift was scary. A sudden thought came to her and Chie somehow found the audacity to voice it. "You think asking for forgiveness instead of permission would be too much?"

"They'll kill you a hundred times over. As would Haku and I. So please don't. Just ask them."

"Yeah, I thought so." Heaving a sigh, she raised her head and was about to smack her head on the desk again but before it even made contact, Yuu put his hand in between the two.

"Ow," Yuu mumbled under his breath.

"Stop putting your hand between my forehead and the desk then."

"I'll stop when your head stops hitting the desk. Or any other hard surface for that matter." He let out a sigh just as large as hers before fully looking at her. "Will you ask Rei and Sei?"

"Might as well. They'll break the tie."

"I don't know how much their impulsive opinion will really help but go ahead by all means. I think they might be with Uncle Kouha in the city."

"I figured too." Getting out of her seat, Chie made her way towards the door but stopped when Yuu called out to her.

"I'm sorry if it's not what you wanted to hear. But if they do say no, I don't think it's with bad intentions. They love us. They just want what's best."

Chie gave him a thin smile before nodding. "Yeah, I know."

* * *

"Of course they would."

"Not. Yuu-nii's right, you are crazy."

"Could you guys maybe make up your minds?" Chie groaned in frustration a she leaned against one of the many stone pillars. Slowly, she slid down until she crouched before the house that her twin brothers were helping build.

Houses like this one that were built for the ever steadily growing population of Kou would be added to the lands that Kou had free for fifteen years. A good chunk—almost half of the new eastern continent—belonged to the Kou Empire, and because of the new lands, the empress and mother had been at work to create housing for those who wished to immigrate to Kou. Because of their particular strength and dexterity, Rei and Sei had grown rough housing amongst themselves and her to her chagrin but more to the point, they had grown knowing and experiencing what hard work meant.

The twins didn't like violence, not unless it was against one another, so they refused the gift of swordsmanship which Kohaku took. Instead they deemed their abilities useful for other means. Rei and Sei had always been the odd pranksters in their family which to her surprise always ticked their usual calm and loving mom off. Their dad seemed to have given up on controlling their behaviours to a certain point.

He drew the line with politeness and compassion; anything other than that, he said, they should experience and decide if they'll keep for themselves. Their mom was a bit less lax than that. Maybe more than just a bit. Uncle Sou said that it wasn't quite strange since she had basically raised them the same way. To be respectful, to be caring. Chie supposed that the dogma that the two were raised in was different from Kohaku's, Yuu's, and her own simply because they were different.

Not bad, just different. And in her eyes, differences weren't meant to be dismissed or pushed away. They were meant to be understood. Once they were understood, they would no longer be differences.

Now at fourteen, the twins helped day in and day out at the capital, serving under their Uncle Kouha who was in charge of reforming the city's infrastructure. He had the magician's fealty and love because he understood them best; it seemed he bestowed that same understanding to the people who could not join the forces in agriculture. The normal folk needed a helping hand as well, she thought.

"It's not something a parent would let their kid do at such a young age," Sei explained. His long hair was swept back into a ponytail and tied with a dark blue ribbon. A few strands escaped which he wiped back from his forehead along with his sweat as he pulled up a pile of blocks with a pulley.

Rei took care that the pile wouldn't fall over as it rose from the floor, only letting go once the load lifted beyond his height. Fixing the red headband against his short hair, Rei spoke as watched the load. "But Ma and Pa won't just flat out say no, either, don't you think? Tad bit cruel that would be."

"True but—" Sei groaned, pausing a bit, as he pulled in the load to the second floor of the house they built, "—you know how they are. 'Member how Ma never let us go near shit when we were kids?"

"Pa did to," Rei corrected.

"Not as much as Ma did. I'm telling you, Chie, you ask her that and she'll chain you down to the palace walls herself."

"No she wouldn't." Both Rei and Chie contested loudly, the latter getting angry that he was being so negative about their mother.

The younger twin shrugged his shoulders, not minding the verbal attack thrown at him. "Fine, don't believe me. But I warn you, you better be thinking about some other gift you want. Besides, what's wrong with home?"

"You moron," Rei called, heaving at Sei a ball of wet cement which hit squarely at his shoulder and eliciting an obscenity that Chie brushed off like she always did. It wasn't like Kohaku or their father were any better when they blew a gasket or two. "It's Chie's gift. We can't tell her what to want."

"Just do, Chie. Ask for something else instead. Like a pup, or a kitten, or a new dress."

Fed up with his attitude, Chie did as Rei and chugged a ball of wet cement that hit him square on his face. "Pig!" Chie shouted.

"What the hell!?" Sei wiped away the thick plaster while spitting parts that had gotten into his mouth away. Seemingly not liking what they'd done, he jumped off of the house and stalked towards them.

"You deserved that," Rei said with a snicker.

" _ **Fuck—off!"**_

Chie screeched at seeing what Rei didn't and luckily moved out of the way fast enough to avoid the chunk of mud and plaster that Sei threw at them. Well, Sei missed her, not so much Rei who spat at the floor just like Sei had done.

" _ **You little bastard!"**_

" _ **Not as funny when you get shit thrown at you, huh?"**_

" _ **You'll pay for that."**_

Chie didn't understand a word they said but knew by their angry tone that they weren't any nice things. Covering her ears as they went at each other, Chie ran away to hide behind a pillar that was far away from her brothers as they began hurling stuff.

"What in the seven hells?"

Looking up, Chie couldn't do much but frown at their Uncle Kouha who had plenty of materials on his back. She supposed they were for the house they were building but the infighting caught his attention more.

He turned to her and raised an eyebrow, asking what they were fighting about. Chie thought about it for a second; she'd gotten her answer from the twins and Yuu hadn't been wrong. It wasn't of much help. She didn't want to deal with them anymore either, especially like this. They usuallu took a while to calm down, less if someone intervened. So she figured if anyone was better at calming down a pair of idiots fighting, it would be her uncle.

"They couldn't agree on something. And well, you know what usually comes out of that."

"By god," he sighed heavily. Letting down the materials nearby, Uncle Kouha strode confidently towards her warring brothers before smacking them both upside the head to get their attention before promptly beginning to lecture them. Seeing that there wasn't anymore reason for her to be there, Chie left and headed home.

Four visits, four opinions that differed two to two. In the end, she wasn't any better than when she started. She still had no idea of what to do: ask or keep her peace. Chie guessed that since there were still a few days to her birthday, she still had time to think. Certainly in that time, she'd have made up her mind.

She prayed that she did.

* * *

"Why-have-you-forsaken-me—" Each hissed word was punctuated with a hit of her forehead against her pillow as the morning of her birthday came. She'd been unable to sleep the whole of the night before from thinking about what to do, and even after so many wakeful hours, she had come up with no good answer.

It'd be breakfast time soon and every year they would have breakfast to celebrate as a family. The celebration where the rest of her extended family would join would be at night, a small banquet that their aunt insisted on holding for them. As a child, Chie enjoyed the time they got to spend together, especially when many of her family members were usually busy or travelling. Now, though, all she felt was anxiousness. It was during breakfast that they asked about what she wanted. It's what they'd done with Kohaku and the others. But seeing as she had to face it sooner or later, she decided to go and face it now.

Braving through dressing herself while mentally preparing for what was to come, Chie quickly put herself together and headed to the dining room. Their mother and father weren't there yet, thank goodness, but the rest of her siblings were already there and in their respective seats. Their parents more often than not took to sit beside one another and had the oldest of them flanking each with Kohaku next to their dad and Yuu next to their mom. The twins were separated but still faced each other with Rei next to Kohaku and Sei next to Yuu. As the youngest, she took the seat across from their parents. Many times she thought it a privilege because despite being the youngest she was the only one that could talk to them while not being looked down on. They had to raise their heads to hear her from across the table, and as absurd as that sounded, she liked it. Now, her position made her want to puke.

"You alright there, Chie?" Kohaku asked, her face etched with concern.

"You feeling sick?" Yuu added just as worried.

She really wanted to groan and hit her head against the table but she restrained herself from doing that and instead gave them the best smile she could. "I'm fine. Just anxious."

"Did you make up your mind about what to say to them?" Rei inquired. His large hand came down on her head trying to soothe her. Chie shook her head and felt his hand move with it.

"If I were you, I wouldn't think much of it." Chie turned to face Sei whom she was still cross with because of his blatant lack of care. But right now it seemed that he was being serious which was pretty unusual for him. "Look, make it simple. If it matters that much to you then ask them and don't be scared. 'Cause you can bet that you'll regret it more if you leave what's important unsaid."

His words sunk in her mind for a second. It appeared that all of them had become quiet at his uncharacteristic wise words. It was Rei though that broke it with a snicker.

"Congrats, Sei. You officially sound like Pa."

"Fuck off."

"Ren Kousei and Kourei." Chie's heart stopped at hearing the rare sound of their mother's scolding voice. All five turned their heads to the entrance of the dining hall where they had failed to notice their parents' arrival. Their calm and collected father stood in contrast beside their mother who held a very annoyed air around her as the two approached the table. "The both of you will not speak like that in front of us. Do I make myself clear?"

Rei and Sei sunk into their chairs like cowards. Smart cowards, in her opinion. Their mom was the kindest mom there ever was. But when their mom became their 'mother' she was as stern as their father, if not more. And that usually was reserved for them.

"Yes, mother." Once hearing their joint agreement, her whole demeanor changed in an instant to one of complete joy. Before Chie could tell, her mom ran up to her and scooped her out of her chair into a grand hug.

"Oh my sweet child, happy birthday!"

"I can't...breathe, Mama."

"Ceara, watch your hold." Chie noted their father's words carefully despite still missing oxygen from her mom's tight embrace, one that was stronger with her left hand than her right.

Apologizing to her, their mom put her back down on her chair before smiling and caressing her face. Chie couldn't keep the smile that came over her as she repeated her merriments for her birthday, ending with a kiss to her forehead. Their dad came behind their mom and Chie got out of her chair herself this time to go and hug him. He met her halfway, bending to make her small hop enough to reach him, and Chie snuggled in the embrace her dad gave her. With a sweet kiss to her temple, he congratulated her in a soft tone.

Chie thanked him and then her mom again. Her mom clapped her hands and asked for all to be seated so they could eat. Thankfully, she didn't feel sick through the whole of breakfast. Their warm receiving made her forget about what plagued her mind for a couple of hours. Even after they ate, they fell into a chatter amongst themselves that prolong everything. And soon to the gifts that each of her siblings had gotten her. It was only after her siblings were done that her dad spoke.

"So have you decided on what your gift will be?" he asked.

The brazen reminder made her stiffen for a bit before her gaze lowered to her empty plate. Sei's words kept running around in her head and the more they did, the more she realized that her brother was right for once.

More than anything, she wanted to learn and explore about the world that she lived in of her own accord. And if she didn't ask this of them now, she would forever regret her silence. She didn't want that.

Mustering the courage she needed, she took a glance at each of her brothers and sister. Each held in their eyes silent encouragement, from the oldest to the youngest, and that gave Chie more than enough strength to answer them.

"I-I have."

Their mom excitedly clasped her hands together and smiled. "What is it, sweetheart? We'll do our best to make it true, so just tell us."

Well, here went nothing. "I want to go explore the world."

Although her smile didn't falter as fast, Chie noted a clear change in her mom's attitude more than her dad's. Apparently still somewhat confused, she shook her head and asked, "What?"

"I want to explore the world, mom. I want to travel...out of Kou. By myself."

Her mom blinked in disbelief, her lips moving but only mumbles escaped her. Chie thought her dad a bit more calm about it since he replied faster and because of how he began, it gave her some hope. "We understand, Chie. Let us ta—"

"No." The sudden lucidity that hit her mom brought those words out of her faster than she could see coming and cut her dad right off. "N-No, Chie. There is no way that's happening."

Instant reactions of inquiry were shot at her from all of her siblings, but not her. She had expected the answer but getting it was like an actual punch to the gut.

It took another second for her voice to come back to her. "B-But mom, I really want to go!"

"Chie, do you not realize how dangerous the world can be? Especially for a little girl travelling alone!" She shook her head, mumbling under her breath before raising her voice again. "There's no way—"

"I don't want to stay here anymore!" Chie cried, desperate to get the answer she wanted. "I'm tired of learning of a world I'll never see! There's peace now, it's not as dangerous anymore. Surely I can—"

This time the interruption came from her mom raising her voice and getting up from her seat. "You will not step a foot out of this palace, Ren Kouchie, and that's—"

"Ceara." The room became quiet as their father's voice echoed loudly through the hall. Once he had her attention, he looked directly at their mom without flinching. He didn't say another word, just stared, and their mother seemed to understand something unsaid between them before calming enough to relax her squared shoulders. It was when she sat back down that their father stood from his chair and addressed them serenely. "We'll finish here for now. Kohaku take your brothers and sister and do your errands for the day. And Kouchie—" Sniffling and feeling the prickling at the corner of her eyes, Chie forced herself to look up at him. "What you ask isn't a simple request. I'm certain you're intelligent enough to understand that. As such, wait until before the feast tonight. Your mother and I will speak about this and give you our answer then. Do you understand me?"

Feeling her throat too tight from holding back her tears, all Chie could do was nod. She glanced back while Kohaku was escorting them out to her dad talking in quiet whispers to her mother who seemed to still not be completely calm. As their figures obscured as they left the dining hall, she felt her sadness and anger boiling. It wasn't until they reached the foot of her door that she couldn't take it anymore and let herself cry. Her siblings took her in their arms and let her spend herself from the disappointment and bitterness.

Chie had known the sure impossibility of her wish but even so still she hoped that maybe she was wrong when everything else told her otherwise. How she hated being right.

* * *

"What is there to talk about, Kouen? Your daughter—your _youngest_ daughter—wants to leave!"

Kouen let out a heavy sigh at his wife's loud claim which she voiced the moment the doors to their quarters closed behind them. Like she did when it concerned the children, she was over her head with restlessness. Ever since Kohaku asked for him to teach her swordplay, Ceara's worry had notably doubled. Despite not blaming her for it—he certainly worried about their children's well being as well—Kouen also knew that she couldn't bet her all into overprotecting them either. That's not how they would grow to be the best they could be.

"She's eleven."

"A child!"

"One that has proven numerous times to be an abled young girl."

"Young girl, Kouen, you said it yourself. How do you expect me to willingly let my little girl run off, alone, into a world that's even bigger now than it ever was when we went around conquering it?"

She had him there. As much as he endorsed his children's independence and ability to self-discover themselves like he, his own brothers and sisters, and even Ceara had, as their father, he had to agree with her on this. The world was far different than what they knew before. He would've gone to explore it himself and learned what laid beyond the rift if he had the chance. But he had other responsibilities to his family and his country. Kou and his family had been and would always be his first priority. Because of that, Kouen understood her point.

Nonetheless, he argued forward. "We trekked through that world even when it was as new to us as this one is to her. We cannot judge her for skills she hasn't had a chance to prove."

"You and I were trained soldiers! You were proficient at what you did as was I. You cannot compare her life to ours when I know for a fact she has never learned to protect herself," she berated him. "And I won't let you test if she can survive by letting her leave, either. You can't ask me to let her go like that. You can't!"

"We can compromise," he suggested. "You're not wrong. She isn't trained in either combat or survival skills and that does deter me from giving consent. But those can be learned. She can learn fast and well; those are skills she's proven to have. And may I remind you that neither of us started out as masters at our crafts. You and I gave sweat and blood to learn what we did. You yourself were her exact age when—"

"Which is how I know she's not ready! I know exactly how shortsighted and idiotic a kid her age can be. More so when backed into a corner. I don't want her to suffer through that, En. I don't want her to make a mistake as big as that and for her to carry that weight around with her for the rest of her life!"

Kouen understood well what she meant. Despite this, he also knew that he couldn't let her project her fears onto Chie. She had done this with the rest, especially fifteen years ago after the fight that made their world as it was. And what left her as she was now. His gaze fell unto his own prosthetics that allowed him to move freely once again after years of struggling with his crippling body. Impulsively, he reached out to Ceara's left hand with his right and caressed it under his thumb. The gesture, one that he'd done countless of times after that battle to the limb she lost that had been replaced like his had, visibly pacified her as her breathing slowed down and her gaze lowered to their joined hands.

After a few more seconds, Ceara closed her fingers around his hand and heaved a sigh before sitting down on the nearest lounge. Kouen followed and sat beside her to wrap his arm over her shoulders and stroke at her arm. Gently, he leaned his head against hers as she buried her face in her hands.

"I know how you feel, Ceara. I'm wary as well about what she has asked because of the things I've mentioned and the many more I didn't. Nonetheless, we can't keep her here forever. We can't protect her or any of them forever. What we _can_ do is prepare them the best way we know how."

"...I know."

Kouen still felt her stiff shoulders and let out a deep breath through his nose. "I'll have them prepare a bath."

Ceara furrowed her brow in confusion. "We already took—"

"It's for you, to help you unwind. And once you're done, let's talk about this with more time and clear minds. It's the least we can do for Chie's sake."

She gazed down at her hands one last time before taking a deep breath only to let it out slowly. Ceara nodded without any further ado and leaned against Kouen's shoulder wanting to relax there for a bit. But it appeared she understood his approach. It was better to talk about this before making a rash decision they could regret or worse...that their daughter would hate them for.

* * *

With dusk quickly approaching, Chie didn't feel like changing even when the feast celebrating her birthday was but an hour away. Her heart and mind were still heavy and grieving about having been so blatantly denied. She had known that it was highly unlikely for them to say yes but she couldn't help feel sad about the outcome anyway.

After that morning, she really didn't feel like attending the banquet. Instead, she ignored and hid from the maids that were supposed to help her change and sought refuge in the west gardens where the changing landscape had made the side of the palace quite different from anything else in Kou. No longer a leveled plain, that part of the palace had to be rebuilt in order to adapt to the scaling hillside it became. These parts, though many were new housing for those who already resided in the palace, were also used as training grounds because of their landscape, making it a challenge for the soldiers that participated. But none of that interested Chie in the least and it was definitely not why she chose this place as her hiding spot.

What did was the tree that clung to one of many islands that now hovered around Kou. It wasn't one of the highest islands that came to be, neither was it the biggest, but it was the biggest tree she'd ever seen and it engulfed most of the island. It was easily reachable from the hillside of the eastern palace since, overtime, the roots that protruded from the bottom of the earth hunk grew long enough to reach the top of the hillside. It was almost like they had run out of nutrients in that tiny island and the tree willfully survived by extending its hands downward to the fertile land beneath. Those same roots were what allowed her to climb to it so easily and got her to that island.

The moment she stepped on its soil, she recalled the second reason why she liked this as a hiding spot. The so-called buzzing that rang through the air was something that not many could withstand for long. Or at least buzzing was what she knew the others to hear. Her and her siblings, however, heard something different. To them, the air carried with it a low humming that sounded more like a song than some annoying noise. And the nearer Chie got to the base of the tree the louder the humming became. Soon as the canopy of the great tree covered most of the moonlight from entering, Chie thought she'd have trouble making her way around. But the tiny voices that burst into laughter—like what she imagined faeries from the stories she read would sound like—guided her through the semi-darkness and into the core of the tree where she found a comfy seat around the glowing moss.

This place always fascinated her. None of her siblings knew what made this place and this tree so magical. From what she knew, only magicians like her Uncle Judar and Big Brother Aladdin could use magic. But she knew that these enchanting beings that lived near the tree, small bubbles of sound that burst into giggles around her, could only be made of magic. She liked it here and it certainly made what had happened before a little less dire.

Just a little.

"You look sad."

Chie couldn't help but jump at the little girl that appeared out of the blue and that had scared the daylights out of her. She held her chest for a minute before speaking, "W-Who are you?"

The girl smiled kind-heartedly, her dark eyes shining despite the lack of light. "A friend. And as a friend I don't like seeing you sad. Are you okay?"

She couldn't understand where the girl came from or why she was avoiding her question like that. But something in her put her enough at ease—be it the magic there or the serenity that she felt underneath that tree—to talk to the girl with the truth.

"Not really."

"What's wrong?"

Chie pursed her lips and pressed her hands against her forehead. "I want to explore the world. But my parents won't allow it."

"You're just a child," the girl pointed out. It didn't sound like advocacy to her parent's choice. Simply the statement of a fact.

"I know but...there's so much that I want to know about this world."

"There are so many books that tell of the world, though. Perhaps learning from those is safer."

There was no helping the groan that escaped her as she picked up a rock and threw it far away into the distance. "I've read every book there is and it's not enough. I want to experience it and see it all with my own eyes. I want to know the world that only I can see."

The little girl came closer to Chie and sat down, still keeping her distance by putting a few feet between the two. "I understand. You know, I too wanted just that a long time ago. My friend and I, we promised that one day when we were older we would get on a ship and sail far away and travel the world together."

"You did?" Chie asked curious.

The girl nodded and smiled before turning to her. "Do you know the legend of the wishing tree?"

Chie nodded. It was an old fairytale that Kohaku had been enamored with years before and that she never stopped telling them about. Chie liked it too albeit less fervently. It was the tale of a lonelsome boy who wished for a friend and in his loneliness buried his wish in a glass jar and buried it deep within the earth close to his home. The story said that his wish was so strong and filled with longing that it sprouted a seedling. The boy, amazed at the miracle, took care of the tree that came to grow like no other. During winter it would not die, during summer it would not burn, during fall its leaves would not wither, and during spring it would flower the most beautiful crystalline flowers in the world. This tree grew and grew over the years and when it's canopies reached the heavens, the story goes that the boy found a girl there. She had been lost and during that night's heavy pour had found refuge under the canopy of the tree. The boy took the girl in, took care of her, and soon enough became friends and married and never again were either of them lonely or sad.

It was a child's tale. One that she believed taught them that if they believed and worked hard enough for their wishes that they would be given what they wanted. But Chie didn't understand what that had to do with what they had been talking about.

The girl smiled instead of answering that question and pointed right beneath where Chie was sitting. "My friend and I would come here often and bury jars filled with ours wishes at times. I'm sure they're still here somewhere."

Curious, Chie stood up and used her hands to dig up the moss and soft dirt around the roots of the tree. Sure enough, not even a couple feet deep into the soil was a glass jar with cloth covering the top that was tightly wound around the neck. Chie cleaned the dirt off of the glass and looked through to see a rolled up piece of parchment inside, somewhat intact. Unable to help herself, she opened it and read what was inside.

" _I wish mom and dad would get along better."_

"Oh, that's mine. Not the one I wanted to show you, though." The girl pursed her lips for a second and pointed elsewhere. "Maybe it's that one there." Chie went about digging up another jar, this one containing a different handwriting that was barely legible.

" _I wish Cael would come home soon."_

"That's my friend's. Again, not the one I meant to show you. Mm...maybe it's over here."

* * *

"What do you mean she's not here?"

"We've searched everywhere, Miss," one of the many soldiers told her. "Lady Kouchie isn't in the palace premises."

Ceara could feel bile rise in her throat and her heart beating way too fast for her own good. It practically wanted to jump out of her chest. Kouen thankfully took the reigns and addressed the young soldier, "Search again. Expand the perimeter to the outside as well." Once he and the group of soldiers left, Kouen turned to her and placed his hands on her shoulder. "She's not gone. You need to calm down or your heart won't—"

"Please, don't. I know what can happen. Frankly, I don't care. I just want my baby back." Ceara couldn't help choking a bit as she tried pushing back her sobs. Crying wouldn't help, she needed her mind clear to help find Chie. Her baby was home. She wasn't gone. Ceara repeated those things to herself to stop from thinking about the worst case scenario of her having left already.

 _No, stop it._

Chie was in the Kou. She was in palace. She had to be.

Her anxiety got derailed as she overheard Kohaku shouting at her siblings from a mile a way. It took them a few minutes to arrive to where they were. Seeing their clothes for the banquet so disheveled from running reminded Ceara once again that Chie had never shown up for the banquet that was promptly cancelled after half an hour went by and nobody found trace of her daughter. As soon as the news got to her, Kougyoku mobilized the soldiers and servants to search the palace. Everybody was in on searching for her little Chie and as no news kept coming, Ceara only blamed herself more and more.

All she wanted was to find Chie.

" _Over here."_

Baffled, Ceara spun on her heels, ignoring her kids and husband, as she focused on the voice that had swam into her head. One that she hadn't heard for over fifteen years. It was just as clear and youthful as she remembered it being and it called out like an echo that came from the east.

" _She's over here, Ceara."_

"En, the tree."

"Wha—Ceara, wait!"

She didn't listen. Instead she went off at full speed towards the eastern part of the palace. All the way there, Ceara couldn't imagine how Chie found it. Certainly, the place wasn't a secret to anyone. It was the gift left to the world and was for everyone to embrace. But she never told any of her children about what it was or what it meant to her. Some lingering fear prevented her from ever doing that but it reignited when she heard Kohaku—her friend's voice once more calling her to it.

The island was easy to reach and easier to climb now that she was used to her new arm. But even with how tired she was and how she could easily hear the murmurs of her heart from overexerting herself, Ceara didn't stop for a break until she reached the tree's core. Her eyes scanned the area in the dark but all she saw as her eyes adjusted was that same tree now surrounded by small holes scattered around it.

The laughter and giggling of voices she had forgotten after so long came to her ears as they repeated 'she's here' over and over again. It wasn't until she heard her voice, though, that she believed them.

"You know—" Chie called out as she emerged from behind the tree with something in her hands that she kept cleaning with her sleeve, "—after ten or fifteen of these, I'm starting to think yours isn't here anymore."

"Chie."

Her daughter finally lifted her glance away from whatever she held in her hands to her and froze at seeing her. "Mom?"

Ceara didn't falter and ran up to Chie, scooping her into her arms before she could say or do anything. Chie struggled to speak but Ceara won her to it before she could. "Don't ever scare like that again, you hear me?"

"M-Mom? I'm sor—"

"No, I'm sorry." Ceara said, pulling away from Chie and brushing dirt off her face as she gazed into her eyes. "I shouldn't have dismissed you like that. I shouldn't have shot you down just because I'm afraid for you, darling. I shouldn't have."

Chie didn't reply, just kept slowly nodding her head in understanding. When she lifted it to speak, though, something behind Ceara caught her attention enough to raise a brow. "Dad?"

Hearing that, Ceara stood up in time to see Kouen and the rest of her children reaching the core of the island. The noise around this place didn't let her hear them coming and she stepped aside as Kouen went directly for them. He quickly made sure that Chie was alright and before Ceara could say anything, he had his hands all around her instead to check her as well. Ceara didn't bother stopping him and breathed easily as he finished by placing fingers against her throat to check her heartbeat. In spite of all the noise, Ceara could hear the murmurs in her heart. Even with them, though, it was beating as strong as it could be.

Once he verified both of their safeties, Kouen dragged out a long sigh. "Don't run away like that again. That's to the both of you."

Ceara didn't protest. Chie did. "I'm sorry. I just wanted to get away for a while. I wasn't feeling to good for parties."

"You should've said something," Yuu told her as the four approached the rest of their family. "You scared the living daylights out of us."

"Why here, though?" Sei's comment made Rei shrug his shoulders.

"It's secluded, I guess. Plus it's a fun place to be at no matter the time." The twins snickered between each other as if sharing a secret unvoiced.

"I was about to come search for you here, too," Kohaku added. "You disappearing reminded me of this place after a while since we liked it so much here."

Those news made Ceara's brow furrow in confusion. "You've come here before?"

Her four oldest stiffened a bit but guilt relaxed them before long as Kohaku rubbed the back of her neck, the twins chuckled nervously, and Yuu averted his gaze.

"It's a nice place," Chie said aloud as she turned to the tree. "Very magical and peaceful." She scrunched her nose and held what appeared to be a dirty jar before her to inspect. "And apparently a wishing tree."

"Wishing tree?" Kohaku repeated.

"Like that story?" Rei and Sei asked together.

Chie nodded and rubbed away the dirt from the jar as Yuu approached her. "What's that?"

"A wish." Ceara watched as Chie uncovered the jar's front to showcase the small rolled up parchment inside. Her daughter went about opening it, taking out the parchment and unrolling it to read what was written. Her brow furrowed after reading it. "Mom, it has your name written on it."

Confused, Ceara reached for the paper Chie passed to her and read it.

" _I wish to explore the world with Ceara."_

It took a few times of reading it over, looking back at the jar in Chie's hands, and to the holes in the ground before Ceara took a sharp breath in recognition. "They're our wishing jars."

"What do you mean?" Kouen asked.

"Yours?" Chie said at the same time just as confused. "But that girl said they were hers and her friend's." From her pockets, she procured about fifteen other pieces of parchment. "These too."

Ceara read through each one passing them along to Kouen as she explained. "We wrote these back when we first came to Rakushou. We buried them under an oak sapling the day after Emperor Hakutoku's coronation." As she read on, she couldn't help but sigh in relief and nostalgia. "I thought they were lost after the world landscape changed." Amazed but baffled all the same, Ceara turned to her youngest child. "How did you find them?"

"Like I said, that girl told me where they were. She said she was looking for one in particular. That one, I think." Chie pointed at the one that Ceara kept in her hand, "She said that it was a promise between the two of them. That I…"

The sudden sour turn of Chie's expression prompted her to ask, "That you what, Chie?"

"That even if you didn't let me leave, that I should keep on wishing. That I should never stop. Because her friend...because, I guess, you never did and eventually got to explore the world like you wanted."

Amazed by this, Ceara turned to Kouen wanting an explanation. One they both knew he didn't have. There was no logical explanation to why Chie talked to Kohaku. Logical in the sense that magic wasn't involved. Knowing that, Ceara walked up to the tree's base and put her back against it to slide down to a seat. Against its bark, Ceara could feel the magic that swelled in the great oak and spread out through the island. Despite the years, she felt the vibrations that the magic it channeled gave. It wasn't like having it in her body anymore but curiously enough, she missed the sensation even after all the hardships it put her through.

It would always be a part of her just like it was part of the world now. And just like all people were. Ceara looked up to Chie as she approached and reached out to her. Chie came and sat right before her as Ceara brushed her red hair back over and over.

"I don't wish for you to give up on your dreams either, Kouchie. And I certainly don't want to be the reason why you do." Ceara lifted her head to look at Kouen who only gave her a soft smile before nodding. Smiling herself, she looked back at Chie who waited expectantly for her to continue. "Which is why your father and I decided that we would give you the chance to explore as you wished."

Her daughter's eyes glazed over as tears began to well up in her in them and a big smile spread from ear to ear. "R-Really?"

"With conditions," Ceara told her, "but yes."

"Thank you. Oh, thank you so much!" Chie threw herself against Ceara and she caught her right into her arms.

The rest of her family came over and helped them both to their feet. Her children came together to congratulate her and talk loudly about what a grand thing it'd be for Chie once she's out there. And though it tugged at her heart, Ceara smiled as Kouen held her close.

"We did the right thing, didn't we?"

He nodded. "It's what we thought best. There's nothing more to hope where that's concerned."

Ceara nodded in agreement. It wasn't really a question of right or wrong, though. At least not for them. The only judge of that would be Chie once she left. It was kind of a sweet and sour thing that she felt; glad to see that she would live the life she wanted yet sad to see that she would part with them for goodness knew how long.

But Chie would leave eventually, she reminded herself. They all would. And like Kouen said, all they could do was teach them all they could in the best way they knew how.

Wanting to focus on the positive of all this, Ceara clapped her hands and got her children's attention as five heads turned her way. "It might be a little later than expected but I think if we tell Aunt Kougyoku now, we can still at least have dinner before the night is over."

The children erupted into cheers and hurried along to leave the island and return to the palace. Kouen stayed behind with her to help her down and at the edge of the island just before they would climb down, Ceara caught sight of her children already below and running away towards the western part of the palace were Kougyoku would be.

"We raised them well," she whispered, sitting at the edge and grabbing onto it for safety.

"I doubted I could but you and the others did give a good example for them."

Ceara scrunched her nose. "You were the most wonderful father they could ever have."

"Hopefully, the only one they'll ever have or need for."

"Don't worry. It's unlikely I'll ever marry again if by any reason, gods forbid, you're not here." A thought then came to her mind as she began hearing the murmurs of her heart again. "I reckon, though, that I'll be faster gone than you." She tapped at her chest just above her heart to make her point. "Doubt this ticker will hold on more than yours will." When Kouen gave her a rather unusual glare, she chuckled and grabbed his arm reassuringly. "I'm kidding. Although, I am sorry for mentioning it. I know you don't like talking about it."

"I don't because you're highly pessimistic about it."

"For a good reason."

Kouen heaved a sigh then as he held onto her hand. "Aladdin and those other magicians already assured us that it would work. That it will last longer than any normal one will, even a whole one. So try to be positive about it. For their sake and mine."

Ceara chuckled at his concern but nodded. "You know I will always try. If it's for them, I'll work my hardest to live even with his thing beating for me. I'll see all of them grow up to be old like us and listen to Chie when she comes home and tells us stories about her journey. You'll see."

Lifting his hand from hers, he leaned over and placed a chaste kiss on her lips. "That's all I wanted to hear."

She smiled warmly and started climbing down. "We should hurry. The kids will start wondering what happened to us if we don't." Kouen agreed wordlessly and both returned to their family, one that they would certainly live years to see grow.

* * *

 _A/N:_

 _Here's the promised three. These are mostly bits of story that I never thought fitted would fit well into the overall main story, so you get them as little specials this time around. Stick around for to the end of this A/N for a bit of information on the next story for Magi that's coming up sometime in the future._

 _Like last time, I'll give a little insight on the extras._

 _VI—While outlining stories, I write a lot about the characters and their lives in order to know them better and write them efficiently. Despite him having literally no screen time, Cael was a huge thing that I wrote about in the outline when fleshing out Ceara and her past. So here's that edited version. I condensed it as well as stick to already stated facts in the actual story. Even when he didn't appear at all in the main story, Cael, as a character, was a blast to write about. And I think he'll resurge when I write Ishtar's story._

 _VI—This one popped out of nowhere. While I was rereading the chapter in particular about Ceara not wanting to go to the Summit meeting. It was to write more Kouen and Ceara, and also to write a bit of interaction between Ceara and Sinbad which never happened but a lot of you were curious about seeing. Also about the ending of this one, I just have one thing to say: get used to seeing them die a bunch. Out of the main stories that they'll be written in, the main characters will be dying tons in other worlds._

 _VII—I was debating whether to actually write this one the way I did. Mostly because of the major spoilers it has about what happens after Magi's ending. If any of you ask me about them, I'll talk about them vaguely. I will only confirm two things here: yes, she does have a prosthetic left arm. And also, yes, she has the equivalent of a pacemaker. Her missing arm and wounded heart will be things that are addressed in the spiritual sequel of Silent Lamb and of the next two upcoming stories as well. d_

 _Speaking of that spiritual sequel, I've done a rundown of what's to come and wanted for you guys to know just in case you're interested._

 _Silent Lamb was the first foot on the field that I wanted to take. As I said, it was supposed to be a stand alone story and morphed into something else as it went along. Now it's the first of four._

 _The Meanderer is another stand alone and as stated before will focus on Noe. Characters and places that you heard from in SL or that you will know in the future will come through so keep an eye out for those._

 _The third story which I still have to title will focus on Ishtar's younger years before Magi. This is the one where you'll see many of the characters from before make a comeback including Ceara, Noe, Parisa, Seijin, and Rakah but not in the way you've known them. That's all I'm saying about this one._

 _A Little Patience will be the spiritual sequel to all three previous ones and will focus on Basia's journey. Because she is the one to gather them, it seems fitting that her story is the one that ties the loose ends on all three stories as well. In this one you will see the characters of SL, T M, and Ishtar's, as they are in their stories._

 _I know you all want to know what happens and how Ceara story ends but that will have to wait for now. Since I'll be taking a break from Magi stories to finish my KH one, TM won't be published until next year when I finish CoU. I'll do my best to finish CoU, though, and return to TM since I really want to Gift Bearers Series to progress well :)_

 _So for now, and for reals this time, SL is over. I hope you guys enjoyed this and that you stay tuned for The Meanderer when it comes out!_

 _Lastly, I wish all of you happy holidays and that you welcome 2018 happy and healthy!_

 _Cheers,_

 _-Evie_


	20. Update: The Meanderer

**News:**

I'll keep this sweet and to the point to give all a little update. The next installment of this series has just been posted today :D Here's a little summary to get your interest piqued.

 _"The world is beautiful and pure, it's the weeds in it that ruin it." And to save the world she loves, Noé will do what she must: find her friends to free her master. But as she learns what saving it implies—protecting the innocent and the wicked—discourse stirs in her. After all that it has done to her and those she loved, is it really worth saving anymore? "It's not the world that's worth saving," a red cub told her. It's hard to understand his words. But in them hides the truth she wishes to know, a truth she denies to herself, and a truth she has known since the beginning._

So if you're interested head over to 'The Meanderer' to read Noé's story!

\- Sincerely, Evie


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